Stuff White People Like

i’s wood luv to tells all yous a story bout me

1 day a cuple yeers ago i suked a big juicy dick and it was good reel good. last nite my dad stuk his tung in myz asshole and i liked it i’s like it alot mm mmm. this mornin i was wachin saved by da bell on da tv end i’s got real horny when i’s saw zak morris so i started jerking off wit a cheeze grater it bes da best tug i’s ever had than i had myz dog (whos i namd al sharpton) like my cumy dick cleen!

2 bes continued

put alil love in your heart

Check our site out, all of the games are awesome!

Again,

Hello everybody, I told you I would not change my name, and damn it, here I am. I am the REAL Enigma and don’t you forget it, you stupid red neck emposter. Suck a dick. I know I pissed you off, and I plan to do it for a very long time. To those who believed that asshole was me, suck a dick and get fucked, for those who knew it wasnt me and said nothing, kiss my ass too. I’m back, actually, I never left so get use to it. hahaha. Dumb Ass Luke, Buttaroo, Nobraina, and the rest of you dumbass redneck losers who conspire to get my goat, mission NOT accomplished. I told your bitch asses that you would give up YOUR name before I give up mine!!! hahaha

So, as a show of my appreciation to the piss poor emposter(’s) attempt to make me retire my name, I give you………

enigma da director on August 30, 2009 at 2:06 pm
For your reading pleasure

enigma da director #1 on August 29, 2009 at 11:09 pm

I’m back ya’ll and I figue I will start another lil story. I see I have enough players to make a decent little drama. After reading the post on this site, I decided to name this lil story,

“No country for dumb men”
enjoy

Let me tell you a story about a time when I almost got away with identity theft. Oh, who am I. I go by many names, but due to the fact I watched one too many tough guy movies, I call myself, Hot Foot Luke. I know, it’s a silly name, but due to the fact that I am not considered cool, hot seemed like a more logical choice. Anyways, I live in a city suburb in the mid west. I can’t disclose the actual location because,….. well, if I did, it would get more people one step closer to finding out who I am. I always had trouble in school, but I am finally about to graduate. My mommy pulled a few strings for me and convinced the principal to allow me to graduate this year. Yessss, I was starting to feel the pressure of being 23yo and in still in high school. I started to feel like, well, it just was’nt cool anymore. Anyways, my story begins, the way so many do, on a clear blue monday morning.

As my alarm clock rang and broke my slumber, I had a feeling this was going to be one of those days. I hate going to school, I hate having to wake up at 5:30 in the morning to catch the school bus. My only biggest regret though was staying up late last night watching dirty cable movies. But since I can’t get a girl friend, a nerds got to do what a nerds got to do. I get from under my sheets and I shove my teddy bear, Daisy, under the bed where no one will find her. Dear ol Daisy, she has gotten me through some really lonely nights. She used to be my lil sisters teddy, she had her all dressed up. When she went away to college last year, I took advantage of the oportunity and snatched her and hid her in my room. Her fur placed against my skin feels so natural to me, not to mention, with the lil outfit lil sis put on her, I can hide my glory hole around her private areas pretty well. The hole is nice and small, easy to miss, but nice and roomy for me to do what need to do. Daisy is a very good lover, but I have no time to day dream about it now, I have to rince the residue of me and Daisys hot late night cable porn adventure off my hands. Then again, on second thought, it will take only a minute. hehe, come here daisy.

Hot foot luke reaches underneith the bed to retrieve his beloved lover Daisy, the teddy bear. He unzips the long pajama zipper on his on peice footie pajamas and rest his love on his chest, rubbing the nose against his nipples.
“oooooh, you feel sooo good baby” he says in a slow dliberate voice.
He slowly slides the lil cheerleader bear outfit off of daisy and pulls down his underwear exposing his teddy bear pleaser tool. He slides daisy’s exposed privates down towards his lil wee wee. With a blank teddy bear look on her face, she slowly mounts mt. Luke. Hot foot shutters with pleasure. His breathing is getting deeper and more intense. Beads of sweat is starting to form along his body. Daisy continues to stare blankly forward as Luke does what he do. The pleasure is building up in Luke and he starts to thrust Daisys love hole even harder.
Now usually when Hot foot Luke has his lil make out session with his baby daisy, he is careful to lock the door to his room. The reason I brought that up is because HFL realized he did’nt lock the door as his mommy turned the door knob to enter to make sure he was up for school. She swings open the door and says……………….

to be continued

Reply to this comment

enigma da director #2 on August 30, 2009 at 12:07 am
When we left off, Hot Foot Luke was in the middle of a hot steamy make out session with this little sisters teddy bear Daisy when his mommy came to check on him. She opens the door and says….

“you up my lil swee…………………OH GOOD!!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU LIL PERV!!!!!!!” she yells.
“MOM, IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. I,I,I, I, WAS……..” he stutters.
“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT, OH GOOD, AND IN THE PAJAMAS GRANDMA GAVE YOU…….HOW COULD, OH GOD.”
she closes her eyes and slams the door. Luke lost his mood that morning. He throws his teddy on the floor mad and embarrassed, not to mention ashamed. But to ad to his indignity, his bedroom door opens again and his mom storms in with rubber gloves on her hands and grabs poor Daisy.
“MOM, NOOOOO!!!!” luke yells
“DEMON, this, this, this, THING, is of the devil. To hell with it” she yells as she heads to the trashcan outside. Luke can’t protest but so much. He was always a mommas boy and did’nt have very much heart. Mom ran his life. As he watched her fussing as she threw his lover into the trash, everything seemed to move in slow motion.
“How dare that lil freak embarrass me like this” she rants outloud, ” and I know this bear, We won this bear….at the amusment park (sniff), what have you done, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE…..!!!!!!” she says getting louder and louder.
” YOU NEED JESUS, you… you…. you ….bear raping FREAK!!!, it’s your sisters bear, wait til I tell her what you have been doing to all her stuffed animals. You should be shame of yourselfff.” she rants.

Fearing his neighbors may be looking, Hot Foot Luke decide not to look around out the window for fear he may see one of them listening. He sheepishly gets dressed and sneaks past his angry mother who has just came back into the house. Luke creeps out the door, to ashamed to say his usual good byes to his mother. As he closes the door behind himself, he can still here her calling him a ‘bear fucking freak’.

He walks to the bus stop up the street from his home and he feels like the whole neighborhood is watching him. The bus can’t get here fast enough he thinks to himself as he takes his walk of shame. He thought the worst was behind him til he looked up at the bus stop and saw who was standing there. He looked up with pure dread in his eyes. His mouth became dry, a lump formed in his throat and his heart just sank. Standing at the bus stop was his bully UH HUH. Uh Huh was a senior in high school, and he always got pleasure in kicking Lukes ass so when Luke saw him there, he wanted to turn around and run but his feet wouldnt let him. He just sinks his chin onto his chest deeper and takes the last few steps to the bus stop.

“hey dumbass” Uh Huh says
“yes?” Luke answers as he looks up from the ground.
That was not a very good idea, as he looked up, he was greeted by a five fingers balled up into a big fist that landed in the middle of Hot Foot Lukes face. As Uh Huh stands there laughing, Luke realizes, it’s barely 6:15 am and his day is already THIS bad, it will only get worse. The bus pulls up and everybody gets on board. Uh huh, Greg214, will talk about him later, and our zero hotfootluke.

“I’m not as happy as I should be” Luke thinks as the bus doors close behind him. I don’t want to go to school he thinks to himself, but his fate is sealed, and he still has to face the biggest threat of all once he gets on campus. But first he has to survive the bus ride to school, and with everyone, including the bus driver who is screwing his mom picking on him, it may not be as easy as it sounds.

The bus finally arrives at the school and Luke scans the area to make sure the coast is clear of other bullies. Uh huh is not paying him any attention at the moment, so he grabs the opportunity flee. As he bolts off the bus, he beelines to his home room, grabs the desk closest to the teachers desk and he waits, waiting on who else will be arriving. Waiting to see who will be using him as a punching bag next. As he stares out the door, he sees the shadows of students going back and forth. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room. Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees……………………………

to be continues

Reply to this comment

enigma da director #3 on August 30, 2009 at 6:58 pm
When we left off last time, hot foot luke was cowarding in his class room waiting to see who his class mates would be. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room…………

Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees a female student walk in. He felt sense of releaf seeing her. He let his gaurd down somewhat sensing she was no threat. To make a long story short, he experieced a drama free first half of class. Special education class was very good to him this year but every nerd knows, there is one place where they are not safe. 12:00 high, lunch time. The time of milk carton showers, lunch tray ducking, and giving up your lunch and lunch money judgement. Luke is dreading this time. No protection from the teacher, he has to fend for himself, but after 23 years, he has learned a trick or two to survive this horrible hour. He would set at the far end of the losers table with his head down, blending in with the rest of the more cooler and respected nerds. This technique did not work this time. Even the freshmen gave him hell, but thats another story. He survived his first day of school, but after his bus ride home, his life would suddenly change forever.

Luke got off the school bus and headed home, he breathed a sigh of relief knowing that his nimesis Uh Huh did not ride the bus home today. He was able to walk alil more confident than usual. As he was walking home this day, thinking how he will be the man once he graduates in June, something caught his eye. He looked down and saw a opened letter for the players ball. It was addressed to Big dick louie, For you L.7 (squares) folks out there, the players ball is for the coolest of the cool. The ball was tonight at 9pm, the letter said. Use the letter as proof for entry.
“I guess the mailman dropped the letter” luke thought to himself.
“If I put on my most spiffy clothes, I could remake myself into something cool. Look the part, be the part as the saying goes” he rationalized. ” I will just pretend to be Louie, They won’t know. There will be lots of people there, who will know?”

Luke rushes home, opens the door and heads to his room. Laying on his bed was a not written by his mother that says
” My son, my lil pervert. I never thought in a million years that you would break my heart the way you did. I want you out of my house. I made arrangements for you to live with your biological dad and his boyfriend. I will not have a freak living under my roof. Start packing you things, I will take you there this weekend.”
Lukes heart sank, he then remembered his beloved Daisy. He runs outside and opens the trash can. There, laying next to the burnt out vibrator and used condoms was Daisy the bear. He grabs his bear and runs back into his room. He closes his door and immediately opens his closet looking for something to wear tonight.

As he thumbs thru his old sunday suits, he tries to figure out what would a pimp wear to the ball. He grabs his 1984 Miami Vice pink shirt with white slacks. Yeah, this is nice. He needs a crown, he looks at his old hats but can’t find anything so he heads to his mothers room. He raids her closet and finds he has hit the mother load. She has a pink and white extra wide rim hat with chicken feathers on the side.
“yeah, I can work this” he says as he trys it on.
He then heads to her jewelry box and grabs several fake gold rings and gold necklaces.

“I am rocking this baby, now for the main attraction.” he thinks.
He reaches for the heavy duty wooden hanger with the long plastic on it that drags to the floor. He grabs that hanger and removes the plastic. Under the plastic is the killer, a grey and brown muskrat fur coat. He puts on the coat and profiles infront of the long mirror.

” I am da shit!!!!” he thinks to himself.
In his eyes, he thinks he is the man. But in reality, he is a royal hot mess.

It is now 8:00, he puts on his last minute touches. His mom wont be home til late tonight, she is out working the block. The keys to the second car is hanging on the wall, he is set. He grabs the keys to the car and heads out on his lil adventure assuming the name of big dick louie. Will it work, we will soon find out…….

to be continue

put alil love in your heart

no way, you like the kentucky yucky?

or kenyucky cuz the state is a sh-thole.

i like charbucks and spending lotsa money on dirty water/toilet water–ooogah–oogah

KFC is goooog yall my dick is tiny.

Hello everybody, I told you I would not change my name, and damn it, here I am. I am the REAL Enigma and don’t you forget it, you stupid red neck emposter. Suck a dick. I know I pissed you off, and I plan to do it for a very long time. To those who believed that asshole was me, suck a dick and get fucked, for those who knew it wasnt me and said nothing, kiss my ass too. I’m back, actually, I never left so get use to it. hahaha. Dumb Ass Luke, Buttaroo, Nobraina, and the rest of you dumbass redneck losers who conspire to get my goat, mission NOT accomplished. I told your bitch asses that you would give up YOUR name before I give up mine!!! hahaha

So, as a show of my appreciation to the piss poor emposter(’s) attempt to make me retire my name, I give you………

enigma da director on August 30, 2009 at 2:06 pm
For your reading pleasure

enigma da director #1 on August 29, 2009 at 11:09 pm

I’m back ya’ll and I figue I will start another lil story. I see I have enough players to make a decent little drama. After reading the post on this site, I decided to name this lil story,

“No country for dumb men”
enjoy

Let me tell you a story about a time when I almost got away with identity theft. Oh, who am I. I go by many names, but due to the fact I watched one too many tough guy movies, I call myself, Hot Foot Luke. I know, it’s a silly name, but due to the fact that I am not considered cool, hot seemed like a more logical choice. Anyways, I live in a city suburb in the mid west. I can’t disclose the actual location because,….. well, if I did, it would get more people one step closer to finding out who I am. I always had trouble in school, but I am finally about to graduate. My mommy pulled a few strings for me and convinced the principal to allow me to graduate this year. Yessss, I was starting to feel the pressure of being 23yo and in still in high school. I started to feel like, well, it just was’nt cool anymore. Anyways, my story begins, the way so many do, on a clear blue monday morning.

As my alarm clock rang and broke my slumber, I had a feeling this was going to be one of those days. I hate going to school, I hate having to wake up at 5:30 in the morning to catch the school bus. My only biggest regret though was staying up late last night watching dirty cable movies. But since I can’t get a girl friend, a nerds got to do what a nerds got to do. I get from under my sheets and I shove my teddy bear, Daisy, under the bed where no one will find her. Dear ol Daisy, she has gotten me through some really lonely nights. She used to be my lil sisters teddy, she had her all dressed up. When she went away to college last year, I took advantage of the oportunity and snatched her and hid her in my room. Her fur placed against my skin feels so natural to me, not to mention, with the lil outfit lil sis put on her, I can hide my glory hole around her private areas pretty well. The hole is nice and small, easy to miss, but nice and roomy for me to do what need to do. Daisy is a very good lover, but I have no time to day dream about it now, I have to rince the residue of me and Daisys hot late night cable porn adventure off my hands. Then again, on second thought, it will take only a minute. hehe, come here daisy.

Hot foot luke reaches underneith the bed to retrieve his beloved lover Daisy, the teddy bear. He unzips the long pajama zipper on his on peice footie pajamas and rest his love on his chest, rubbing the nose against his nipples.
“oooooh, you feel sooo good baby” he says in a slow dliberate voice.
He slowly slides the lil cheerleader bear outfit off of daisy and pulls down his underwear exposing his teddy bear pleaser tool. He slides daisy’s exposed privates down towards his lil wee wee. With a blank teddy bear look on her face, she slowly mounts mt. Luke. Hot foot shutters with pleasure. His breathing is getting deeper and more intense. Beads of sweat is starting to form along his body. Daisy continues to stare blankly forward as Luke does what he do. The pleasure is building up in Luke and he starts to thrust Daisys love hole even harder.
Now usually when Hot foot Luke has his lil make out session with his baby daisy, he is careful to lock the door to his room. The reason I brought that up is because HFL realized he did’nt lock the door as his mommy turned the door knob to enter to make sure he was up for school. She swings open the door and says……………….

to be continued

Reply to this comment

enigma da director #2 on August 30, 2009 at 12:07 am
When we left off, Hot Foot Luke was in the middle of a hot steamy make out session with this little sisters teddy bear Daisy when his mommy came to check on him. She opens the door and says….

“you up my lil swee…………………OH GOOD!!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU LIL PERV!!!!!!!” she yells.
“MOM, IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. I,I,I, I, WAS……..” he stutters.
“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT, OH GOOD, AND IN THE PAJAMAS GRANDMA GAVE YOU…….HOW COULD, OH GOD.”
she closes her eyes and slams the door. Luke lost his mood that morning. He throws his teddy on the floor mad and embarrassed, not to mention ashamed. But to ad to his indignity, his bedroom door opens again and his mom storms in with rubber gloves on her hands and grabs poor Daisy.
“MOM, NOOOOO!!!!” luke yells
“DEMON, this, this, this, THING, is of the devil. To hell with it” she yells as she heads to the trashcan outside. Luke can’t protest but so much. He was always a mommas boy and did’nt have very much heart. Mom ran his life. As he watched her fussing as she threw his lover into the trash, everything seemed to move in slow motion.
“How dare that lil freak embarrass me like this” she rants outloud, ” and I know this bear, We won this bear….at the amusment park (sniff), what have you done, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE…..!!!!!!” she says getting louder and louder.
” YOU NEED JESUS, you… you…. you ….bear raping FREAK!!!, it’s your sisters bear, wait til I tell her what you have been doing to all her stuffed animals. You should be shame of yourselfff.” she rants.

Fearing his neighbors may be looking, Hot Foot Luke decide not to look around out the window for fear he may see one of them listening. He sheepishly gets dressed and sneaks past his angry mother who has just came back into the house. Luke creeps out the door, to ashamed to say his usual good byes to his mother. As he closes the door behind himself, he can still here her calling him a ‘bear fucking freak’.

He walks to the bus stop up the street from his home and he feels like the whole neighborhood is watching him. The bus can’t get here fast enough he thinks to himself as he takes his walk of shame. He thought the worst was behind him til he looked up at the bus stop and saw who was standing there. He looked up with pure dread in his eyes. His mouth became dry, a lump formed in his throat and his heart just sank. Standing at the bus stop was his bully UH HUH. Uh Huh was a senior in high school, and he always got pleasure in kicking Lukes ass so when Luke saw him there, he wanted to turn around and run but his feet wouldnt let him. He just sinks his chin onto his chest deeper and takes the last few steps to the bus stop.

“hey dumbass” Uh Huh says
“yes?” Luke answers as he looks up from the ground.
That was not a very good idea, as he looked up, he was greeted by a five fingers balled up into a big fist that landed in the middle of Hot Foot Lukes face. As Uh Huh stands there laughing, Luke realizes, it’s barely 6:15 am and his day is already THIS bad, it will only get worse. The bus pulls up and everybody gets on board. Uh huh, Greg214, will talk about him later, and our zero hotfootluke.

“I’m not as happy as I should be” Luke thinks as the bus doors close behind him. I don’t want to go to school he thinks to himself, but his fate is sealed, and he still has to face the biggest threat of all once he gets on campus. But first he has to survive the bus ride to school, and with everyone, including the bus driver who is screwing his mom picking on him, it may not be as easy as it sounds.

The bus finally arrives at the school and Luke scans the area to make sure the coast is clear of other bullies. Uh huh is not paying him any attention at the moment, so he grabs the opportunity flee. As he bolts off the bus, he beelines to his home room, grabs the desk closest to the teachers desk and he waits, waiting on who else will be arriving. Waiting to see who will be using him as a punching bag next. As he stares out the door, he sees the shadows of students going back and forth. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room. Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees……………………………

to be continues

Reply to this comment

enigma da director #3 on August 30, 2009 at 6:58 pm
When we left off last time, hot foot luke was cowarding in his class room waiting to see who his class mates would be. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room…………

Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees a female student walk in. He felt sense of releaf seeing her. He let his gaurd down somewhat sensing she was no threat. To make a long story short, he experieced a drama free first half of class. Special education class was very good to him this year but every nerd knows, there is one place where they are not safe. 12:00 high, lunch time. The time of milk carton showers, lunch tray ducking, and giving up your lunch and lunch money judgement. Luke is dreading this time. No protection from the teacher, he has to fend for himself, but after 23 years, he has learned a trick or two to survive this horrible hour. He would set at the far end of the losers table with his head down, blending in with the rest of the more cooler and respected nerds. This technique did not work this time. Even the freshmen gave him hell, but thats another story. He survived his first day of school, but after his bus ride home, his life would suddenly change forever.

Luke got off the school bus and headed home, he breathed a sigh of relief knowing that his nimesis Uh Huh did not ride the bus home today. He was able to walk alil more confident than usual. As he was walking home this day, thinking how he will be the man once he graduates in June, something caught his eye. He looked down and saw a opened letter for the players ball. It was addressed to Big dick louie, For you L.7 (squares) folks out there, the players ball is for the coolest of the cool. The ball was tonight at 9pm, the letter said. Use the letter as proof for entry.
“I guess the mailman dropped the letter” luke thought to himself.
“If I put on my most spiffy clothes, I could remake myself into something cool. Look the part, be the part as the saying goes” he rationalized. ” I will just pretend to be Louie, They won’t know. There will be lots of people there, who will know?”

Luke rushes home, opens the door and heads to his room. Laying on his bed was a not written by his mother that says
” My son, my lil pervert. I never thought in a million years that you would break my heart the way you did. I want you out of my house. I made arrangements for you to live with your biological dad and his boyfriend. I will not have a freak living under my roof. Start packing you things, I will take you there this weekend.”
Lukes heart sank, he then remembered his beloved Daisy. He runs outside and opens the trash can. There, laying next to the burnt out vibrator and used condoms was Daisy the bear. He grabs his bear and runs back into his room. He closes his door and immediately opens his closet looking for something to wear tonight.

As he thumbs thru his old sunday suits, he tries to figure out what would a pimp wear to the ball. He grabs his 1984 Miami Vice pink shirt with white slacks. Yeah, this is nice. He needs a crown, he looks at his old hats but can’t find anything so he heads to his mothers room. He raids her closet and finds he has hit the mother load. She has a pink and white extra wide rim hat with chicken feathers on the side.
“yeah, I can work this” he says as he trys it on.
He then heads to her jewelry box and grabs several fake gold rings and gold necklaces.

“I am rocking this baby, now for the main attraction.” he thinks.
He reaches for the heavy duty wooden hanger with the long plastic on it that drags to the floor. He grabs that hanger and removes the plastic. Under the plastic is the killer, a grey and brown muskrat fur coat. He puts on the coat and profiles infront of the long mirror.

” I am da shit!!!!” he thinks to himself.
In his eyes, he thinks he is the man. But in reality, he is a royal hot mess.

It is now 8:00, he puts on his last minute touches. His mom wont be home til late tonight, she is out working the block. The keys to the second car is hanging on the wall, he is set. He grabs the keys to the car and heads out on his lil adventure assuming the name of big dick louie. Will it work, we will soon find out…….

to be continue

put alil love in your heart

Not only do I buy Fair Trade, Organic coffee, but it has to be locally roasted. I don’t buy it from Starbucks or the chains. It has to come from small businesses near my hometown. Moreover, I grind it myself and I use a French Press. And you know what, I’m not only white, I’m a WASP. And I’m not only a WASP, by forebears came over on the Mayflower. And I even like SPAM.

Not only do I like Fair Trade, Organic coffee, but it has to be roasted locally by a small mom-and-pop business. I hate Starbucks and the big corporations. Not only that, I grind the coffee myself and I use a French Press. And I’m not only white, I’m a WASP. And I’m not only a WASP, but I’m descended from folks who came over on the Mayflower. I even like SPAM.

My mother, who is special, went “back to the land”,