There is no doubt that white people love coffee. Yes, it’s true that asians like iced coffee and people of all races enjoy it. But I promise you that the first person at your school to drink coffee was a white person. You could kind of tell they didn’t enjoy it, but they did it anyways until they liked it – like cigarettes.
White people all need Starbucks, Second Cup or Coffee Bean. They are also fond of saying “you do NOT want to see me before I get my morning coffee.” White guys will also call it anything but coffee: “rocket fuel,” “java,” “joe,” “black gold,” and so forth. It’s pretty garbage all around.
If you want to go for extra points – white people really love FAIR TRADE coffee, because paying the extra $2 means they are making a difference.
To be fair coffee was invented by Africans and was/has been a African/Arab thing. But not in the way white people are into it of course.
To be precise its origin is Ethiopia and plant origin does not mean invention it was dissiminated by the arab and persian empires through europe and later brought to america and it is in latin and north america a comon drink
On a train in Southern India in the 60s, when we stopped at a station, vendors would run along the side of the train shouting, “Coppee! Coppee! Coppee!” You paid them a few coins through the window, and got a small clay cup with delicious hot SWEET coffee. And when it was done, you tossed it out the window. Very “green!”
Now they hand you the “coppee” in a plastic cup, which everyone STILL throws out the window. Not so great.
http://www.tucc.org
what does that have to do with this topic?????????????
…he was lynched for spamming shitty religious websites on an internet thread
LMAO
If you can’t be clever or funny, you still don’t have to be rude of other people’s faith.
> If you can’t be clever or funny, you still don’t have to be rude of other people’s faith.
That’s true, strictly speaking, you don’t *have* to be rude, but that doesn’t mean you *can’t*. Most religious people are too stupid to not be rude to.
your just the worst type of people, please try and not betray your self induced retardation.
Indian Railways is back to using the terracotta cups – “Kulhard”. And, at a price that beats all – Tea for Rs 4 (10 cents) and Coffee at Rs 5 (12.5 cents).
another thing white people like…tripping through India
I want to trip in India, have a double coppee mochachino and eat a cow.
and then talk about it at a dinner party
I want to be at that dinner party
One thing white people like more that tripping through India is being able to say they were in Manali, Poona, Goa, anywhere, way before it was as overdeveloped as it is now and are able to describe the now quaint ways of how it used to be.
I talked to a telemarketer from Goa. Once I got him started on the town he would not shut up about it.
He has topic on white people taking trips to the third world.
Janala, that reply was very white of you. Thanks for the travelogue from a foreign place.
I love you <3
whats coppee you self indulgant white crustaion?
“Coppee” is coffee in my language (from english obviously). This romancing of the Indian language even from throwing the cup out the train window is really ridiculous. Especially when these whites go all the way to India and see all of the shit, piss, and poverty everywhere and think it’s god’s greatest creation. There’s a lot wrong with India from corruption to opium to AIDs.
what the hell is wrong with opium? and who the hell cares what white people like, im white, i like rap, hate coffee, hate everything European, and most of all hate soccer. LEGALIZE POT****
You’re the wrong kind of white person … read the rest of the blog.
No, he’s the perfect case study…white people like to say how they hate white culture and everyone else has a better one…white people are great at hating themselves.
OKOKOK, I can’t dribble a basketball, and I don’t have rhythm, and I am not inscrutable, but I don’t feel guilty, even though I have liberal opinions. It is not a tough load. This site is a gas.
I’m good at basketball, I b-boy regularly and have rhythm and hated the idea of something like coffee defining my inheritance into a culture, when other cultures have such passionate arts and music and dance. I found this homogeneous example of what white people are insufficient. I dislike the current conceptions of ‘whiteness’ because white people are a diverse group internally and all creating a page about ‘white people’ liking coffee and dinner parties is going to do is plunge white people deeper into their bland stereotype. I went out of my way to learn many Asian languages / Accents so I would not insult them by grouping them. We are more heavily grouped as white people. because we are most separated in colonial countries and most represented in colonial countries. Development of culture in a multicultural zone will not give any of the one group specificities. Especially the majority whom can’t claim anything grand to their name in case of stamping on minorities or claiming superiority over them.
I don’t know whats good for poor people (I’m pretty broke myself), don’t like coffee, don’t have gay friends don’t care if I have some, I’m just disliking an underdeveloped non-culture representing me, bring something new to the table.
I noticed in the last paragraph of your post that the word “whats” is missing an apostrophe.
Keep this in mind, as stated clearly in post No. 99 (Grammar):
“Do not assume that white people will cast a blind eye to your grammar mistakes in email and official documents. They will judge you and make a general assessment about your intelligence after the first infraction.”
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that’s so true. I also judge people harshly if they’re too wordy.
X-D
Get a life – ever hear of “tongue in cheek”? This is a fun website and i don’t think ever intended to do anything but poke fun at “white people:. I believe the “whites” that read it. are there for laughs about themselves.
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Another perfect example of how whites enjoy being indignant! They defend themselves from the stereotypes and fail to note that the site is a satire! It’s phenomenal! FYI: I’m white! This site is hilarious! Not to mention true!
So not from a white person… they would know what opium is! Besides if that was true it just makes you a wigger!
ok, READ. He said what’s WRONG WITH opium. What’s a wigger? Also, why do ya have ta resort to name calling? Just not necessary. SO glad we are NOT all alike.
Obviously, they are not talking about *your* kind of white person
man you need to get you act together man, you saying this on a public web forum is about as smart as rolling a joint in front of a cop…. and rap music has gone down hill and shows no signs of gaining any more “smart-ed-ness” any time soon.
If you want pot legal go get out and preform some clinical trials to prove there is no ill effects of its use, or get a petition going, or better yet VOTE. you can only change the system by participating in it!
bummer.
Does Meena stand for just plain old mean? Some of us get to see shit, piss and poverty in places like Alabama and Mississippi (where we grew up in all white neighborhoods thank you very much).
they should just come to New Orleans and save all the money and effort of going to a foreign country. We have plenty of drugs, poverty and dirty water.
“Coppee” is actually the malayalam word for coffee.
White people like to explain things precisely which is why a white person invented wikipedia and, of course, a bunch of very white people, invented the Encylopaedia Britannica.
And the rest of y’all are the tards that use it so you don’t actually have to do a research paper for coll “cough” sorry I was going to say college but seriously what was I thinking. Your right we’re bastards that like to keep really good records of stuff.
Very true! White people also like to correct you if you explain something in a way they don’t like.
tom, aren’t you supposed to be over at myspace?
if they made cocaine legal maybe WP would forget about coffee.
Hilarious! It doesn’t have to be made legal, the super rich ones basically get away with it anyway. The penalty isn’t comparable to penalties for other drugs.
actually, crack & cocaine now carry the same penalties in nyc… other cities soon to follow.
Cocaine….thats a very white drug isn’t it?
Yes. It is a bright white color.
nah, i’d just drink coffee while snorting cocaine.
actually I believe the word coffee , is derived from the work qahwah, an arabic and orginates from Arabia not Ethiopia
DING! Officially, the whitest comment yet.
I second that.
What makes a comment white, because it doesn’t say bro or use slang. All of you people stating the most obvious things on this page thinking your so much more intelligent then the next guy, need to look in the mirror.
It’s ‘you’re’.. not your
haha a new whiteness has been reached
Blanca – that’s so white hee! hee!
the correcting thing, and the name thing
what makes it white is how uptight, defensive and patronizing the tone is. Quite an accomplishment as all this is achieved whilst appearing sensitive to country of origin issues and proudly displaying mock-familiarity with foreign languages…
thats what Im talkin about. Im an educated nonwhite and you wouldnt believe how often people patronize me for being successful just because I’m not white. As if they were saying “Hey! good job your not a failure like all the rest of those nonwhites.”
Telling somebody nonwhite good job for something that you wouldn’s say to another white person, is insulting. for example “your so well spoken.” is a complete insult to me. What you think I dont speak english, just because im not white. you know what, lots of people that speak slang CHOOSE to speak in that manner its not a lack of ability.
Why are you so fascinated with white culture/language? being a non-white. Why are you so surprised that people who are not white are stereotyped less knowledgeable of white language and white culture? You would stereotype a white person to be unable to speak Zulu or Xhosa for example, and they could find it just as insulting when someone says “you’re so well spoken” for that language. It seems you’re thinking only in terms of your own misrepresentations as a non-white-being-white.
bull shiite. people axing questions isn’t a choice. they’re retards who don’t know how to speak the english.
That, my friend, is called “the soft bigotry of low expectations.”
Oh, and since I’m so very white, even if The Wrong Kind, I can’t let this pass without pointing out to you that the word you were looking for is “you’re”, not “your.” No White Person of Any Kind would ever dream of patronizing you with a comment like “Hey, good job your not a failure like all those other nonwhites!” It simply isn’t cricket!
Haha
How ‘educated’ are you exactly? Primary school should have taught you about the correct use of punctuation and grammar.
ay yous a BITCH
that’s the spirit!
It is . . .
1. A precise explanation
2. Steeped in multiculturalism
3. About coffee
THAT’S what
That whole first sentence needs some grammatic attention. Is it a rhetorical question? What is your intention? Peace Out.
But, what if some hippy vegetarian who can kickbox said it in a really slow tone of voice that … sounded like patchouli. (yes, it’s that pervasive…it’s the smell you can even hear.)
don’t forget your ritalin
white people like pharmaceutical drugs a LOT.
Arabia? can you point to that on a map, because I have never heard of “Arabia.” I suppose you missed that geography lesson . . .
oh please – the term Arabia refers to the Arabian Peninsula, that thing that sticks out into the Indian Ocean including Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Oman etc. And yes, I learnt that in geography class
I’d like to make this thread just a little whiter. (Note my use of MLA conventions—unfortunately I am not a member, although joining it might move my whiteness-level into the stratosphere.)
The etymology of the word “coffee” is as follows: “Alteration (influenced by Italian caffè, from Turkish) of Ottoman Turkish qahveh, from Arabic qahwa.”*
*“Coffee.” Etymology. The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. 4th ed. 2000.
yeah but white people like it
You must have gone to graduate school!
ur a dick
and you suck dick!
your momma.
actually in Yemen – by a goat herder who noticed his goats getting hyper after eating berries from a tree (coffee berries before they are dried and beans are exposed).
actually, coffee originated in modern day Yemen and was distributed throughout the ottoman empire
^^^ Run On Sentence ^^^
^ Sentence Fragment ^
The Yemenis would disagree with you over who discovered and disseminated coffee.
white people like to ignore African and other non-white history that stares them directly in the face, indirectly insulting the intelligence and ingenuity of those people. Like, admitting that coffee came from Ethiopia, but implying that the Ethiopians didn’t use it, or that coffee wasn’t important until some other people brought it to white Europe. “Plant origin doesn’t mean invention.” How ludicrous! The Ethiopians cultivated coffee for thousands of years. That’s how the Arabs and Persians knew about it.
white people like to re-write history.
white people like to ignore African and other non-white history that stares them directly in the face, indirectly insulting the intelligence and ingenuity of those people. Like, admitting that coffee comes from Ethiopia, yet implying that the Ethiopians didn’t use it, or that coffee wasn’t important until some other people brought it to white Europe. “Plant origin does not mean invention.” How ludicrous! The Ethiopians cultivated coffee for thousands of years. That’s how the Arabs and Persians knew about it, through trade and migrations.
white people like to re-write history, leaving the contributions of non-whites out.
Hmmmm somehow this website is not racist. Its ok to make fun of one race as long as its white right? Imagine if someone created stuffasianpeoplelike or stuffblackpeoplelike. It would be down within minutes because we would all consider that racist.
I think we totally need “Stuff Asian People Like” and “Stuff Black People Like” sites. Preferrably done by white people.
White people like fighting racism by fighting against websites pointing out idiosyncrasies of particular races. Except against white people.
Idiot
Guess what a stereotype is…
Yeah, its a bunch of people seeing the same damn thing…
lol
don’t you know satire when you see it?
you people are ridiculous these post on this site are so funny especially 61 about bicycles it’s not meant to be racists just funny
so enjoy it don’t act like it hurts you are anyone else reading it
i don’t think the site is racist at all…but the comments start crossing the line when readers really miss the point of the jokes
Your grammar hurts my whiteness.
i think i hear satire! but you can see it if you want.
http://www.stuffethnicpeoplelike.com So funny.
I think white people would be the only ones to create such sites… we do, after all, enjoy explaining things.
…I think not.
http://stuffebplike.com/
There already is a Stuff Black People Like…written by Black people though. Sorry.
Actually I think it helps to be from the cultural group being mocked. It is just more fun to mock your own. This site is funny because it is so accurate and detailed. I’d have examples from my past for about 95% of the assertions made.
My son goes to school with bunch of expat Columbians and Venuzleans and he finds they have funny little quirks, but he can’t really pin down the details on how it all goes together and can’t mock them. He can do rich white teenagers without much trouble. My wife is from Japan so she mocks Japanese-people-things with great amusement.
People in Japan mock Japanese stuff all the time. I mock white-people stuff with a friend of mine.
Its not racist its cultural-stereo typing that is funny. Europeans do this really well with each other.
I’m pretty sure a white person writes this blog. Unless it was an Asian or Black person that wrote it, and it bashed white people for enjoying these things, it isn’t racist. This site won’t even flirt with racism unless it starts poking fun at other ethnic groups. You obviously don’t get on the internet much since you think sites can be “taken down” within minutes of their launch just because of their name. The chances are, “stuffblackpeoplelike” already exists in a completely different form. Lighten up, dude (which is something else white people like: calling other men “dude”).
its a white canadian guy and a filipino-cdn
Waahhhhh. Racist. Blah. Blah. Blah.
That would be, “bwaaaaaaaa!” Get your terminology right.
anonymous, r u replying to yourself? WTF????
Actually, it should be ok to make fun of black people, too. At some point people forgot that there’s a difference between picking on a person and making fun of people.
Feel free to check out http://stuffeducatedblackpeoplelike.wordpress.com/
It’s just as satirical and oh so embarassingly true. And we all know that we can never really call it racist if it’s true
A black brother? Is there any other kind of brother?
I have brother and he is white.
That’s just ignorant. Racist?
Are we still laboring under that false ideal that color blindness is color equality, or is it possible to have an honest (even humorous) dialogue about the pronounced caricatures (i.e. stereotypes) of various cultures, religions and even races provided such is done without hate or superiority? If the answer is the former, then I suggest the person above watch the stand-up of a great thinker named Mr. Richard Pryor, and catch up to, say, the 1970s.
dat be “ignint”
Ummm, what about the coffee thing…?
Indubitably!
Wait! How can I use i.e. in this post effectively??? *cries*
Oh! and if the answer is the former.. what is the latter?
Now that was a white answer.
am i the only person, besides ALL my black friends, who thinks there’s only ONE race: the human race?????
But, who will win this race? That is the question.
Then please explain to me how only black comedians get way with making fun of white people? Why can’t a white comedian get way with making fun of black people? “Reverse” racism is not only common, but acceptable. I don’t think it should be, but it is.
You must have missed a little sitcom known as Seinfeld. They spent 9 seasons making fun of white people.
You didn’t get his post at all, they said all kinds of people poke fun at white people, like the Jewish ensemble on Seinfield.
He said White comedian’s don’t get away with poking fun at non-whites. Please read before you write jeez
they were white people making fun of white people. and yes they were hysterical.
I couldn’t tell if you were kidding. Those sites already exist:
http://www.asian-central.com/stuffasianpeoplelike/
http://stuffebplike.com/
Any Hispanic ones???? Plz!!!
Its never racist to take the piss out of your own ethnic group. Ever watch any Mell Brooks movies? Nobody but a Jew could get away with what he does when joking at the expense of the Jews without being called an anti semite – and I.ve seen video of a famous black comedian making fun of ‘Stupid Niggas’. Cant remember the guys name right now.
So yes… its ALWAYS fine to make fun of your own people.
BTW I’m a Brit.. we’ve always had a love/ hate affair with racist humour.. especially about the dumb micks…
This has always driven me nuts.. you do realize that the Irish are the SAME RACE as you, right? They are as white as you are! So if you need to find a reason to feel superior (you Brits excel at that) I would think you could come up with something more accurate. The fact that someone of British citizenry even has the gall to make a comment like that after centuries of oppression, rape and murder of the Irish people is sickening.
This whole blog is idiotic, and not even remotely funny. Hurrah for broad generalizations and creating more division between groups by highlighting their “otherness”. Hahaha hilarious /
Please go find a sense of humor. If people can’t laugh at themselves about their idiosyncrases (?) then the apocalypse is upon us. If you can’t find humor in this blog–go somewhere else. It’s really easy to just click the “X” in the upper right hand corner. Ya’ll have made my day. WP are fun to make fun of–we can be absolutely enthralled with ourselves sometimes.
Can’t say I agree with your whole post, but that guy’s last line kinda got on my nerves too. I thought the same thing. However, I’m always laughing at my people, hell sometimes about other people so…. can’t fully agree.
Micks are Scots, not Irish. Find a list of Scottish clans and they’ll all start with ‘Mc’.
No, Josh, ‘Mick’ is (offensive) English slang for Irish.
To us ‘Sasenachs’ (Gaelic slang for Saxons= English) the Scots are ‘Jocks’.
Mick has nothing to do with the Gaelic patronymic Mc or Mac (which you’ll find in Irish and Manx surnames not just Scottish). It comes from the first name Michael, abbreviated to Mick.
Here’s a clue: Race is a cultural construct, not a biological one. If a Brit thinks the Irish are a different race, they are. Are the Japanese, the Chinese, and the Koreans the “same race”? Try asking a Japanese, Chinese, or Korean person, vs. an America person. You’ll almost certainly get different answers.
Who’s right? They all are. Race is a cultural construct.
Yeep, I could be a different race from my own cousin because we adopt many different ‘cultural actions’ but visually we are perceived the same.
race is a social construct invented by societies that want to keep people in their place. AND WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH COFFEE.
You’re ignoring another classic white person trait: self-depracation to the point of being obnoxious. How many times have we all seen the new white person in a group try to gain acceptance by being falsly humble and thus seem very “real” to the group?
There is a website for Stuff Asian People Like (see “JAPAN”) and there’s a link in one of the posts.
And get a sense of humor. This is funny stuff! 99% of my friends complain about their expensive coffee habit and yet do nothing to fix it. That’s great!
This is stereotypical; which means there’s a small grain of truth in it – look up “satire” in the dictionary.
White people get a hold of an idea/trend and won’t let go…they like to think it was all their idea. Just laugh it off.
I’m half white (but basically consider myself “white”) and I wish people would laugh more about their own races’ idiosyncrasies.
And yes, Jews are good with money.
first of all you aint my brother. second i have nothing to say for i dont want to over analyze comedy. looksl ike you are turning white. you need to drop out of grad school you self absorbed ahole. (what ever color you are).
You should check out the minority response. http://www.stuffethnicpeoplelike.com. It’s hilarious.
That is funny!
This is very true…however by NOT pulling it down it just reflects to me that we might be just a little more ready to laugh at ourselves….. a little more intune to the fact that it’s funny, sometimes true and that it’s ok to laugh.
“Its ok to make fun of one race as long as its white right?”
Right. Good boy!
It will be necessary to make a lot of fun of white people to get to the level of excess other ethnicities and races are unfortunately used to – and, consequently, to be racist against white people –, because white people, after ages of disrespecting everyone on Earth who was different, take great advance. And white people are still living of the profits of that… and hope to live a lot more… and I don’t mean money. I mean social integration; growing up where good schools are and your grandparents were born; being natural of organized countries, with security, health; not having to leave your country to have dead end jobs cleaning white people’s houses etcetera etcetera… all that was built up on richness that once belonged to other people and white people took in some moment of their glorious national histories. Plus – by doing so, white people made it impossible for other people to develop and organize naturally in their own time and territories. This is not yesterday, it still is.
Now, some people thought that at the slightest appearance of some regret by half a dozen white people, the rest of them could live happily ever after and not bother about anything anymore. Do they really believe centuries of exploration could be solved during the (oh, so white) love-and-peace-five-year-fashion in the 60s?
Individually no one is guilty of things done by another person: but communities have responsibilities, countries have responsibilities – is nothing but truthful to expect white people to volunteer and individually take a share of their heavy heritance. Someone must do it and act consistently. It can´t be abstract sorrow for no one to bear. There’s a whole world to change. Not being such a sissy would be a nice simple thing to start with.
GET OVER IT!!!!! Talk about a sissy…..
I think you’re right. In fact, my husband and I were just talking about this at dinner. I don’t think that it’s necessarily bad for us to talk about things like this either. I think we would all be better served if we layed our feelings and thoughts out on the table–honestly, and with an open mind. Racism didn’t go away when black people were allowed to vote and work regular jobs. Many people seem to think that because black people are “allowed” to do the same things (and in the same places) as white people, that everything is okay. But the reality exists that my grandparents got a head start, so to speak becuase they were white. Whereas, a black girl my age (28) may have a family who is years behind, socially, economically, etc., becuase while my granfather was working to build a life for future generations, her (black) grandfather didn’t have that opportunity. We fail to realize those things sometimes.
Racism will eventually become less and less of a problem, as cultures evolve. But to ensure that there is no relapse of the past, we absolutely cannot ignore the fact that it exists. Deep down, whether they choose to admit it or not, everyone knows it does. We should speak openly about it, intentionally crossing racial borders to get inside the minds and hearts of one another so that we gain a respect and understanding of what causes racial lines.
It would do each of us some good to stop taking offense to comments and start trying to understand why those comments are made, what causes them, etc.
While I’m not sure buzmav is right in that making fun of white people to level the playing field, so to speak, is the right approach, the basis for his comment was pretty much dead on.
Yours truly,
The White Girl in her Twenties
Racism will never fade, not until and black kid can go through 3rd grade without learning about abraham lincoln. We all need to realize that black people will always feel like they are owed something by white people, due to the fact that our great great great great great grandfather owned yours. You hating me for this reason would be like me hating the Red Sox because the ex ex ex ex ex ex ex owner and manager let the babe go,, but wait I DO, so wtf who cares this is like deal with it quit trying to solve it
What are you talking about? Racism won’t stop until kids stop learning American History? The importance of Abraham Lincoln’s presidency, while over-stated by historians, is symbolically as important as any other presidency in American History.
As a white person myself, I love the blog. It isn’t even making fun of me, it is making fun of “typical,” “trendy” white people. This blog makes me laugh because it’s true, and because it makes fun of the type of people I’m not friends with.
It makes fun of the people I *am* friends with, and it’s still funny.
Hahaha, I was just thinking that.
The White Girl in her Twenties
Racist hah! lol…
I do knot know about any ethnicity that shine above any other one. In Chinese, Arabic/Muslim, african or Inca’s cultures all nations killed, raped, sold to slavery and commited genocide of their own and other cultures and often they still do.
American Indians killed each other with unbelievable cruelty, committed genocide and took each other’s land . We all descendants of savages.
As for whining about “growing up where good schools are and your grandparents were born; being natural of organized countries, with security, health; not having to leave your country to have dead end jobs cleaning white people’s houses etcetera etcetera” – that’s EXACTLY what everyone experienced arriving to America – Irish, Jews, Chinese, and many others came through all these and own NOTHING to less succesfull citisens.
…all that was built up on richness that once belonged to other people … really???? Do you want to weight what exactly white people took from other people and what did they give them?
…but communities have responsibilities, … is nothing but truthful to expect white people to volunteer and individually take a share of their heavy heritance …
I never heard black community apology for burning and destroying american cities 40 years ago or mass pogroms of Koreans and their buisnesses in California ten years ago.
amen to that.
I disagree with some of what buzmav wrote.
“because white people, after ages of disrespecting everyone on Earth”
Many white cultures did not take part in slavery or colonialism. This is a terrible stereotype to put onto all white peoples shoulders. My ancestors were never involved in slavery but I am this Caucasian misplaced migrant we call ‘white’.
“Plus – by doing so, white people made it impossible for other people to develop and organize naturally in their own time and territories”
All underdevelopment world wide is at the blame of white people?! that also depends on your definition of ‘developed’
China’s economy is developing faster than any other nation in the world currently, do white people not have as strong a grip on them as under developed countries and 3rd world countries white people are sending aid to? You can place angst on ‘whiteness’, but not on its people in general.
How long do you think that white people should pay for the mistakes of the past because hate started back in the biblical times when man was all the same color? Do I ask you to judge a black man for slinging dope on the corner or judge a jewish man for his beliefs? There are so many different types of raceism. To pick one from so many is small and one sided. After you read this you should realise that hate and violence have created man to do such Sad Sad things to each other. We will all be judged in the end and when Iam Ihope that race is not an issue.
Kinda like creating a United Caucasian College Fund, eh? Love, peace, and chicken grease…
Blacks don’t need a “what black people like” Web site, they already have BET channel on TV.
Wow, BET. Yay, we get to get one freaking channel out of the hundreds available!!!!!! *Please note sarcasm*
How about http://www.uglychinesecandians.com run by a third or forth chinese-canadian.
Check out “Stuff Educated Black People Like”:
http://stuffebplike.com/
Not only racist, but liberally biased
BLACK BROTHER
Many people like to think that there not racists, when in reality they are. Like you big black brother, the fact that you thought about this site and racism at the same time makes you exactly that racist
ahem….
http://stuffebplike.com/
http://http://www.asian-central.com/stuffasianpeoplelike
There are such lists, dumbass! And people like me (a black guy) love them and laugh at them.
I agree. I love them too. I laugh at them knowing some of them true. Many comedians also makes jokes about their races, and I laugh at it because I know it’s true. For example, I remember I was watching a comedy stand-up talking about the difference between white people and black people. It was aying how most white people would be like “I hope no one takes my seat at the theater” while a black person would be like “I wish someone would try to take my seat.” It was just so hilarious to me because I knew it was true, and especially since I said something similar the day before about someone stealing my food. I think we just all need to lighten up and laugh about ourselves.
I think it’s always OK to make fun of your own peer group.
oh goad! didn’t you read? white people like people to make fun of them because it shows they are (their?) superior because they can laugh (that’s larf) at themselves, I mean, theirselves.
it’s not so much the coffee culture, as the cultural appropriation of the “coffee bar” concept in North America, and the fact that now we encounter f*cked up beverages like super pumpkin flavored double chai latte with soy milk, and furthermore, we buy it TO GO. In my town, the Starbucks is frequented equally by locals of Somali descent, but they drink…brewed, drip coffee. Or the occasional espresso. Like the rest of the world.
actually, the Turks during the Ottoman Empire had coffee shops….they were frequently points where political discussion and grouping of anti-sultan activity…..they were eventually shut down and banned for these very reasons….
But then so was the Banjo …
#.23 White people love to be right.
You are all stupid ignorant white people, coffee and tea (for that matter ) are two of the oldest and most powerful trade commodites in the world, long before WHITE people discoverd them. Ten years ago most of you losers didn’t even know how to order coffee, and thanks to the green machine you all are so sophisticated.
Maybe should all leave your sad little lives and explore the world to see what true experiences lay ahead.
Excuse, me you need to relax and stop looking for reasons to throw the race card at people. There are appropriate times to do so, but this is not one of those times. Calm down bro.
You mean there are times when you can throw a race card at someone, please, list them me too, I’m white, but hell, I can still do this right?
Is it OK if I just watch the Discovery Channel?
of course dahrling! we wouldn’t want you to catch any of those nasty non-white diseases traveling to palces where they haven’t eliminated salmonella or e-coli
Actually, a lot of white people are very ‘explored’ and look outside of their own culture heavily from my experience. they travel abroad constantly and love to take part in other cultural experiences, foods, language etc. Just look at which cultures performed studies of other cultures predominantly. I find a lot of non-whites more close minded.
No one argued that white people found coffee and own the rights to drinking coffee. Its a silly representation of what white people like. Not to say others don’t enjoy it as well, lighten up!
Wow! There is a lot of sanctimony in these postings and little humour. This is all farce. So many have taken this site, this phenomenon all to heart and have made it into a soap box to stand on. Trying to show that you have an intellect by this sort of debate only displays how little intellect you have. Hatred is the province of those with a weak mind and even weaker character. Give joy people and if you can’t, let those who can do so! There should be a twelve step group for Aholeism! Now I’ve succumbed to two other traits of being white, the compulsion of pointing out the failings of others and participating in a rant.
you know i can look things up on wikipedia too. i choose not to. i’d rather sit here and drink my red wine.
I invented Coffee, and wrote the articles you “googled” or pestered Mr Jeeves for.
i pooped my pants
You cant invent something that nature produces,coffee shops sprang up in 18th century in Europe which began the coffee house craze. They did not and still do not exist in Ethiopia where the first coffee trees were found
Lived there – and they have great coffee houses. (Photo from one… http://moourl.com/vki2o). Internet Cafe’s are popular all over the Horn, too.
… and in Ethiopia they say coffee was discovered by goats – not “people of color.”
But was it a white goat or a goat of color that discovered coffee?
I’m white, and if it’s a hot black liquid, is not on fire, and doesn’t smell like it been ran down someones’ butt crack… IT’S COFFEE… and being white… I DRINK IT.
i crapped myself
The “c*nt” comment raises an interesting point:
White people* love asterisks (and footnotes in general).
Also (may already be listed, didn’t check): quoting things and parentheses.
*I’m white.
ALLERGIC TO FUN!
Wrong. It was the Turks who invented coffee. And theirs is still better than anything you can get here in the US. As a die hard, seventh generation American, it’s hard for me to concede this, but Turkish coffee is superior.
Turkish coffee is good – but it was Yemen who started brewing the stuff and brought the plants to the Arab world. My favorite so far was in Sumatra – but getting beans roasted table side at a cafe in Yemen is nothing like the crap you can get imported here.
You know, people that post comments on these things are some know-it-all motherfuckers. you guys really know your shit. props.
retards.
“You know, people that post comments on these things are some know-it-all motherfuckers. you guys really know your shit. props.
retards.”
Oops, did you and I just contribute Derek?
BismillaharRahmanirRahim
as-salaamu ‘alaikum. It is good that you mentioned this, I think perhaps coffee is something that all people generally like. What a beautiful thing, something we can all agree on! Coffee…
-Saifuddin
you guys just obviously arn’t white enough to know that it doesn’t matter where it comes from, it was worthless until us white people made it worthwhile. Its like Jesus, He didn’t matter till he was white, thats all Im saying.
lol lol lol lol omg lmfao
In fact, Jesus was not white. He was middle eastern, from Israel. you know?
Firstly…best blog EVER! Whites do love their coffee, but even more specifically Starbucks. They like the status symbol of walking around with the cup and silently letting everybody around them know they can afford Starbucks. Also, they like the Jazz music at most stores. Whites love jazz. It echoes culture and the melodies stir the feeling of ease, calm and happiness in White people. Nothing like a little Miles Davis and a “cup of joe” in the morning for a white person to start their day.
not a big miles fan. and i don’t think i’ve ever called it a “cup of joe”. where r u from? new jersey?
funny but so not true. Your talking about yuppies, not white people. I am white and I love coffee I’ll give you that but starbucks is far too much money for me and when I can afford it I get and Iced chai latte. oh and Jazz sucks ass.
Hello, our names are Nicole, Rachel, and David. Being all white, we woud liek to add a few to your list.
White People like the idea of quakerism, golf, tennis, country clubs, and Computer Competencies.
Thank you,
Nicole Rachel And David
Wow. See Grammar #99
Maybe you should refer to #20…
and I’m talking about the very first comment…
This has to be the whitest thing I’ve ever read.
this whole site is so anti-white and anti-american. thats racism. racists
It’s not anti-white
It’s anti everything.
When you come to realise this, you may also earn google revenue and fool the masses.
once again white people taking ownership to stuff they are not entitled to
This site is blowing up! Your total hits might just double today.
I’m drinking some Vietnamese coffee right now!
Anonymous is definitely the whitest respondent on this entry. “To be fair” White people love fairness. “coffee was invented by Africans and was/has been a African/Arab thing.” Especially fairness to other races. People of colour invented coffee, get that, other whites! Not that is was stated otherwise, but anonymous must be glowing with multicultural pride by pointing out the achievements of non-whites.
Not true. To be fair, the thing white people like most is to pointedly correct somebody who uses the pronoun “he” that it could also be “she.” Second best is making a point of this in your own statements, but nothing compares to catching somebody else improperly properly using the generic ‘he’ as a gender neutral pronoun.
Omgosh I exploded
Fair? This is a term not familiar to the Human race, you must now by hung by a rope tied to an ever so familiar overhanging branch of a tree.
[...] Posted by Spartan2k supposed to get some good free trade coffee, but it hasn’t arrived yet #1 Coffee Stuff White People Like __________________ [...]
[...] Posted by Salted NutsNE1 #1 Coffee Stuff White People Like __________________ Leave the gun. Take the [...]
Arab kids start drinking coffee after they get off the bottle or the boob…
But we drink out of tiny cups and sometimes (if we are from the Khaleej) drink a clear-colored version of it-so i don’t know if that counts
Caffeine makes one want to go #2. How is this bad?
This is such a funny site. It’s been less than one month since this site’s existence and I congratulate you writers (“whriters?”) for the great material.
Continue to enlighten us non-whites about your whiteness; I believe many whites like to call that “integration”.
“integration”
Hello racist..
“Racist”
Hello bandwagon
“Bandwagon”
Hello Bandwagon hater
The list goes on, but while the point is very mute, I will add that integration as you state, isn’t about whites accepting other ethnicities, it’s about other ethnicities holding a life time of grudge and resentment for something they never experienced.
I’m white, but I don’t give a toss, but if you want to argue the fuck out of history, go for it!
Moot? dumbass.
Bravo. I couldn’t have said it better my self.
I recently found someone’s iPod (gee, ya think they were white?) that she left at a grocery store (!?) and after spending a day trying to get it back to her, while she flamed me on said 400 dollar device as a thief, she presented me with a $5 Starbucks card.
I don’t drink coffee.
20 bucks would have been nice.
why did you give it back?
I hope you are not in the position of makeing any decisions at the work place or a voice of reason to any young people?
terry couldnt cope well with making the the decision of whether or not to spell “making” correctly
Congratulations on being that douchebag who criticizes others for their typos in blog comments.
coffee is fucking delish, i’ll give you that!
Hey, the first ever SWPL comment.
You got you’re own TV show yet?
Coffee is wonderful…and I’m a black guy. If I couldn’t be the first to comment, I’ll settle with 2nd repy to 1st comment. LOL.
i’m white and i hate coffee
Ditto. I like diet coke, hot chocolate, ice tea, fruit juice and milk, but I hate coffee.
Wow you are insightful
I agree with you on whites loving the outdoors and making people feel bad for not joining them. I live in the tropics where the humidity is 70-80% and the daily temperature at least 30 degree celsius. It’s freaking hot and many of the white expats who just arrived love to show how they love going for jungle tracks and getting lobster tans in our blistering heat when no locals in the right mind would bother to go out in the heat, feed mosquitoes and run the risk of heatstroke.
hahahah this is so true. I know people who pay a premium for fairtrade/organic coffee just because it makes them feel good LOL @ white people. suckers
Know what else is white? making a list about white people.
ha!
Gee… I’m white, but I can’t stand coffee? Does this somehow diminish my white-ness? Can I still claim ‘caucasian’ on my job applications, or should I check the box next to ‘other’?
I’m so confused…
White people also like heavy set dancers that are light on their feet. Example: Kate Smith.
Some of you haven’t understood the concept of “whiteness”. It’s about trends, activities and behavior that only white people enjoy (liking diversity as such) or can enjoy (feeling superior to other whites). Of course, most of the subjects are of the lame progressive kind which are whiter than white. If you are one of these progressive minded idiots, we are here to mock you! If you are white and don’t enjoy the trends, activities and behavior on this site, we don’t care!
Obviously, Anonymous, making a list about white people is not white (something that is only enjoyed by white people) since many black comedians made a career out of making fun of whites. Of course, only white people like disparaging jokes about their own race made by an ethnic minority. Paradoxically, it makes them feel good about themselves (very white!)
You especially don’t want to call it coffee when you’re ordering.
Call it a “Drip”.
This site is hilarious. hahahahahahahahaha
I want to personally thank you for choosing this white person’s favorite thing in the world as #1. I’m sure organic food is somewhere on the list as well, and I just want to let you know that I’m drinking an organic blend that I grind and brew myself.
“They tried to make me switch to decaf, but I said, ‘No, no, no…’” –Amy Coffeehouse
I think Starbucks is not cool anymore; if you go to a Starbucks regularly, the only way not to meet with disapproval is if there literally isn’t any other coffee place in town. But if that’s the case, you have the opportunity to add hurriedly, with a hint of frustration and apology in your tone, “I really wish we had a good local coffee shop around here, but ya know, I have to get my brew from somewhere!” Sympathy and commiseration will ensue.
–LO
Is it a coincidence that 13% of the population enjoy orange soda?
i thought it was grape soda?
This whole series has been awesome! Check this out!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=QgmCBKPHnSY
oh god, it’s all so true…i do love fair trade coffee!
I never understand the addictions to coffee and cigarettes. You pretty much have to force yourself to like them by drinking/smoking for weeks until you’re hooked on the caffeine or nicotine.
EWWWW
You obviously have never tried either for more than a puff or a sip. Cigarettes get you REALLY high when you first try them so you keep going until you realize you’ll never get that buzz again, and you’re already hooked. Coffee actually tastes good when you dump crap in it like Starbuck’s, then after you get used to that the black stuff tastes good too.
That’s so true… I hate coffee, but I smoke. And when I started smoking, I did it for the social coolness of it, i was 16. And it was so bad, the taste, the heat, the smoke… well, I now love it and I know it’s my addiction that is speaking with my mouth. So bad.
Love is in the air
Ezekial,
That was quite the statement you made up there. I shall see to it that you are butt raped by a coffee loving mexican by the end of this week whilst listening to Morrissey’s greatest hits. G’night my little gringito…
Besos,
-Rudy “Tootsie” Cervantes
P.S. – Are you sure you don’t like iced coffee every now and than?
I’m white and I like fair trade coffee. I also like kona coffee from Hawaii. It’s very expensive and tastes great. I will flog myself with a bag of coffee beans for being this lame.
Fair Trade coffee is a rip off, the money does not go back to the farmers. Intersting the guy who runs the non profit org is having a 25,000 sq ft house build on the ocean in Cost Rica
[...] This blog referral post is about how the effective use of email. If you are looking for tips on how to reclaim your inbox or how to obtain a work-life balance, find a nice white friend and talk over it over coffee. [...]
Sometimes I like to bask in my rich whiteness by bathing in organic coffee beans and $100 dollar bills. I just picked up a new MacBook Air, not the $1,799 Air but the $3,000 Air. I absolutely LOVE the new Juno soundtrack, anybody hear it yet?
starbucks had that tv ad with the guy that woodent stop drinking their canned coffee product so the D calls ‘cut’…. remember?
the hush toned voiceover catalogues the ingredients, one of witch is ‘just a hint of non-fat milk’ !?!?
can you GET any whiter than that??
Jeezus!
hi
One bother about the coffee thing though. I work with coffee producers who get a fair trade price, and yes, it does make a difference. A huge difference.
I’m a Mexican guy who works at a Starbucks in downtown San Francisco, so not only do I find this hilarious, I completely agree.
It’s not just Americans either. Canadians, French, British, Germans…..they all love their coffee.
Now for something really cool, listen to and watch Nana Mouskouri sing about black coffee:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOHAdZUjLd8
Oh, yeah.
I’m white and I refuse to buy fair trade coffee because I prefer the free market.
fair trade promotes a free market. Markets are free when they’re controlled by one company.
i meant markets are NOT free when they’re controlled by one company. Fair trade promotes small business and competition. Old conservative values over neoliberal ones.
anonymous poster of comment #14 has a point.
also, blogging is pretty white.
I’m non-white, and you’ve helped me realize that pretty much ALL the things that I’ve felt inadequate about over the years (don’t snowboard or do yoga, don’t drink wine or coffee, don’t go to plays, don’t enjoy 80s nights (SO TRUE), don’t own a bike, don’t listen to public radio, etc.) are really just white things! Of couuurse I don’t fit the mold! Wow… even the kitchen appliance obsession suddenly makes sense! And the co-ed sports! And the cottages they buy on man-made lakes, so they can own waterfront property!
That’s a lot of exclamation marks, but I mean every single one. I am serious. This has actually affected my sense of self-worth. I feel so much better now. Thank you.
i think #1 on this should be blogs not coffee
I am white! I love coffee! I love to drink as many different types of coffee as I can!
Just doing the 12 step whitie program. First step is knowing I have a problem.
LOVE THE BLOG! SO FUNNY!!
Which number is “Blogs”???
I work in a coffee shop, and what white people love more than anything is ORDERING coffee. They like this more than they like drinking it, because it gives them a chance to be really picky about something. The worst thing you can do is get somebody’s latte or cappuccino wrong. They will immediately think you are stupid or intentionally trying to offend them.
White people also love to stand in front of a counter and spend at least 10 minutes sucking their teeth and staring at all the options, holding up the line while everybody waits for their white ass. The more meaningless variations on something you can give a white person to choose from, the happier they will be.
I am white and I started drinking coffee in first grade because it was what we had for breakfast along with toast! I don’t like Starbucks, and I get totally confused when I order a cup of coffee, and then have to answer a litany of questions about size, blend, flavors, cream etc., etc., etc. It’s even worse when I go to a restaurant and ask for a cup of tea! Why can’t people who work in these places understand that if I just say coffee or tea, that’s exactly what I mean. And who decided that a soy product should be called “milk” anyway? I do admit I buy Fair trade and organic products whenever I can because I am now at a place in my life I can afford to spend an extra $2/pound, and besides which, Why shouldn’t I do something harmless that makes me feel better?? Geez, it’s not like I’m buying coke or sniffing glue!
ok i totally agree with the soy milk thing… and rice milk
It is not milk unless it comes from a mammal
And, everyone knows it really does taste like crap.
Even my very-non-white husband who’s an islander agrees.
If a person has to acquire a taste for cigarettes and coffee, then I’m thinking the same could be said for non-milk-milk-products …
Coke and glue are both white … is this a coincidence??
And, I personally know a group of people who have helped Ethiopians develop their own farm to export corporations and they are finally done with being monetarily raped by the middlemen, so whatever your color, it’s worth the little extra — what else are us white people really doing except talking about changing things.
Drink up mateys.
I am having fun reading this blog — so, so hilarious.
And, I’m drinking coffee right this very moment, from a Disney Princess Mug — Belle, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty — all white.
I am white, and I love coffee so much that I spent five years making a documentary film about it. (hey, when are you going to add “documentary films” to this list? And what about PBS??)
You’ve got the white yuppies down, but you’re ignoring our brethren, white trash. What gives?
For a white person, you really have this stuff down. I thought for a while that someone in the white race lost the book on How to be White and Blend In. Love the site and the openess. Keep it up…I’ll Be Back
Instead of drinking their coffee before class, white students are like totally sooo busy that they have to bring a latte to class every morning. Their grande cup proudly displaying that classic green and white Starbucks logo. They look like such scholars sipping on their chai tea latte… it’s a proven fact that not only does everyone take you more seriously when you’re sipping coffee during a lecture but studies show it can add 10% to your overall grade. And let’s not forget the cup reminds all the poor people how rich they are because they can afford a $5 cup of coffee every morning. I love white people!
Hey Rudi, get the stick out of your butt. Different races make jokes at their own expense all the time. Black people make unnecessary Black jokes all the time for shits and giggles. I Hello…… Chapelle, jokes about smart talking Shequitas, people selling pot and running from the police. I mean I hate these jokes but you just learn to laugh them off after a while.
so umm who really gives a fuck?
white folks sound so dumb when they get angry.
What? White people love tea and coffee? Why not just throw some more random beverages in there too?
so if white people like coffee…what do ordinary, good, upstanding citizens like?
Coffee is so 2007…
turn me around 3 times after giving me coffee and see what happens…
I hates fair trade coffee, tastes extra bitter.
I wish I had coffee right now… :/
ROFL I need to make fun of white people because of my white guilt. lolololoser.
Obviously, coffee is an inherent white trait as even though my parents abhorred coffee, I somehow managed to pick it up. They were just ignoring their natural desires!
On a more serious note, this list is amusing and I love the satire, but a lot of it can be applied to American culture as a whole and not just white people. To be fair, “white people” do make up the majority of “traditional” American culture. However, many subjects are trivialized (recycling, art) in a way that I don’t see as funny, but hell, I’m a white person; I suppose that means I see things in a different light. Everyone, regardless of culture/ethnicity, is backwards and strange in the eyes of others.
I am using a Mac, by the way. A mac that my overpaid father who I hate bought for me as a Christmas present. Man, I’m so white. He can buy me expensive stuff I don’t need but can’t help pay for college, complain, complain, complain. God it feels so good and white to hate on him.
…
I don’t really hate him. We just have on of those indie movie type of relationships, cause, you know, we’re white. But seriously, I’m PAINFULLY “white.” Perhaps I should befriend Senator Obama to save face!
Dear,
I’m a korean living in seoul.(name: Oh Minseok)
Korean special investigative team are investigating samsung
corporation.
But they does not work right.
I am suspicious to be bought off.
samsung corporation has many crimes.
And the team investigates samsung corporation.
It contains korean companies samsung,huyndai,sk CEOs’ illegal issuing
stocks or bonds.
The quantity are plenty.
(Three company CEOs did(and are doing) many crimes to me.
Many koreans are knowing it.
But many koreans are bought off by illegal issuing stocks or bonds.)
The team are knowing it.
Korean special investigative team must investigate this.
But they are trying to conceal it.
I ask for asking for this criminal investigation to prosecutors in any
country.
And help the shareholders.
P.S)
Three companies are hacking me and trying to kill me.
And are suspicious to use my name and email illegally.
If you receive another message that I dictated above are not true,
it is not from me, but from three companies.
The things I dictated above are true.
leoscar7@gmail.com
How many of you other white people read the korean post out loud with an accent? this is so funny………
This blog is classic.
I can’t tell you how many people I’ve heard say “you do NOT want to see me before I get my morning coffee.”
Also, white girls love to drink coffee with both hands.
As a non-white, non-coffee-drinking person from Seattle, WA, the most coffee-obsessed city on the planet, this post is absolutely amazing and completely true. Your blog rocks!
This dude is outta control…hahah…read a lot of your other entries…
I just hit #1. This is the bestest site ever. I’m so sending this out on on MySpace bulletin. I’m 34, so it’s MySpace all the way – not Facebook. Did you mention MySpace as the place where white people get creative with their backgrounds and play bands like I Love Math and The Shout Out Louds to show they’re still indie to a core? Oh and for us older whiteys, we get to show off pics of our kids and our volunteer trips to New Orleans before our vacations in Tulum.
THanks for letting me laugh my ass off – and the dead-on commentary.
Best blog ever.
White people love Kudos.
Not the candy
i guess no matter what i do ill still be a stereotype.
im guilty of being white.
[...] saw one friends, he arrived in his Prius and was listening to public radio. He had a coffee cup in the car, left-over from lunch at an expensive sandwich shop. After he took a quick call on [...]
Oh my God. White people totally love coffee! Even white people who don’t love coffee love Starbucks. I swear I know people who drink coffee just so they can go to Starbucks! So true.
MY DAMN SISTER….this fits her to a “T”…..and she’s reading this NOW so I know she’ll know I’m talking about her….with her almost white a**……
Gotta love her, though!
how/why is it that (some) white people love things that are NOT natively available in (mostly) white (formerly) colonized places?
examples:
1) Coffee
2) Chocolate
3) Bananas
4) Oil
Imagine if coffee-producing countries boycotted (white) countries until they stopped colonizing?
Trade revolution, baby! And don’t think you can clone a good espresso OR dark cacao. Bananas has been tried (and it’s killing them off) and the oil thing…well, we don’t have to go there….
if white peiple did not colonize s.america and c. america you people would still be sacraficing virgins , building pyramids and trying to discover fire….
Actually, we (US) get most of our oil from Texas, where white people like to wear cowboy hats and square dance. I have never seen a non-caucasian person square dancing.
[...] of tell they didnt enjoy it, but they did it anyways until they liked it – like cigarettes." #1 Coffee Stuff White People Like __________________ "The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will [...]
The best thing about this site is everyone’s contribution via the comments. This blog entry is good, but there is so much extra value added by such observations as the preppy uni students (love Jessica #56) and women’s two handed drinking habits.
And Alina #39, I know exactly how you feel sister. I’m of Chinese descent and grew up in Australia where I felt that I had to aspire to everything that was white and middle-class, but felt SO inadequate. I didn’t know that it was because I’d never be white. What this blog shows is that all of these things that we felt inadequate about are the trappings of that “privileged” position of being of the dominant culture. That’s why self-effacing and cultural appropriation have become such a white thing. As an “ethnic” (such a white term) my difference is evident. If I were white, I’d probably feel stifled and would want to have a Chinese tattoo to assert my individuality (but I’d probably love my coffee).
Is it because your not white or is it a class issue? Is part of it the feeling of inadequacy we all get from not having the all of the stuff you see in commercials and the media.
White people do love their Starbucks, but it’s not enough now to order a tall latte. You need a custom drink.
“I’ll have the usual….tall iced nonfat latte with two pumps of sugar-free hazelnut syrup…no whip. Thanks.”
You can even get this on your Starbucks gift card now, so you don’t have to say it every time, but white people like saying it every time, especially when their hipster friends are with them.
OMG. I think I’m white. I LOVE coffee! I drink it everyday, and I have a Starbuck’s card that I am constantly refilling. I also buy organic fair trade coffee to “make a difference.”
Other white stuff I do:
Biking, hiking, snorkeling, cross-country skiing, recycling. Additionally I dream of riding a European city bike through the streets of Paris to shop at the fromagerie et boulangerie.
Oh, did I mention that my significant other is white? I’m AA.
This site is hilarious. It’s a broad generalization of middle and upper class whites, as well as other ethnicities of those classes.
I’m looking forward to what Asian, Hispanic, and Black people like. LOL.
hmmm, i had my first cup of coffee about 3 months ago. I am 29 (multi ethnic brown girl)….maybe there is truth to this? lol
ps. Elle, we like hot cocoa ! lol
to john #58
being on the pill makes our hands cold, lol!
this is so true. i am obsessed with starbucks.
yeah i know that i am very slow without my mourning drip. it feels like that someone has put me in slow mode. i don’t drink starbucks often but when i have the chance i go and enjoy a cup on the go.
This entire list of things is only loved by a smaller portion of white people: what they call in politics the “Middle Class Liberal Elite”. A list that truly encompasses what ALL or MOST white people love would certainly not include “being the only white person around”. That would go on the blog “Stuff White People Fear”. Nor would a proper list include “Natural Medicines” or “Asian Fusion Food”. “Natural Medicine”, for your average white American, consists of Pepto-Bismol, Aspirin and Miller Lite, along with a second-rate court drama show. I don’t know if this blog was written by a white person or not. If it wasn’t, well, the writer didn’t do their research. If it was, well, in the words of 3 Six Mafia’s Crunchy Blac, “Y’all gotta catch up wit yo kind, dawg!”
The writer of this blog is excellent at putting words together in clever and creative ways that make them roll off of your mental voice so smoothly when you’re reading. So thus, I give mad props to the writing talent.
But I agree with the experienced white person. This whole website is about the stereotypes people have of yuppie white americans. Go to any country and there are jokes about those crazy americans who love credit cards and HD-tv and paying $8 for a cup of coffee.
That’s the amazing thing about having a good sense of how to actually write and how to be a good story teller. You can say the most generic every day stuff, and pile on a ton of generalizations that allow you to avoid actually analyzing anything, but if you say it in a clever and melodic way, people laugh and say “OMG, that’s so true! Haha!”
You know what I want to see on here? Nascar, pick-up trucks, and professional wrestling. I want to see an entry about Christmas lights that get left on the house until the 4th of July.
Or maybe we could just call a spade a spade and admit that it’s a class thing and not a race thing. But that might take away the fun, because it’s one thing to make fun of other people for being white. You’re supposed to be proud of yourself for your own heritage, which can mean thinking yours is better than theirs as long as you don’t try to act on that opinion or do anything remarkably aggressive about it. But if you start making fun of rich people because “they’re rich” and “they have money,” all of a sudden you’re a socialist or just jealous. At least you don’t get the sour grapes argument when you poke fun at white people, and you’re allowed to keep your political leanings.
haha this is so true..they are obsessed with coffee and those corner coffee shops! I mean every race has their own common thing that they do and this happens to be the “white thing”. In response to the person above me: theres no need to get so defensive, this is supposed to be something fun and humorous. If they wanted to write about nascar,christmas lights and wrestling, it would’nt be funny anymore. It would just be a blog about random things people like but on the boring side. When listening to any stand up comedian, they all make fun of races and what people do because its funny and people like to hear about it so why not. If you feel so strongly then maybe you should start your own blog.
LOL—–They are also fond of saying “you do NOT want to see me before I get my morning coffee.
White people love to talk to you in coffeeshops like they are your best friends They will tell you ALL their business and then want to know ALL yours.
they will also look at the background on your computer and they to scrike up some lame conversation about it.
this is why Apple made so much $$$ from ipod. you must use it in a coffeeshop. it;s like reading a book on a plane to keep people from talking to you…
PS; white, im not stupid, i just dont feel like proofreading this
white people love blogs
Stuff African Americans Like:
Kool-Aid
I mean seriously, I saw a commerical for a Kool-Aid packets, not one person in the commercial was caucasian. There must be a market out there somewhere for dentists that cater to african americans.
Actually, if you really cared to even google search this claim (though it’s not like any others on your site have been painstakingly researched) you would find out that we drink more soda than coffee. Whites (and blacks) drink sodas around the clock. The vast majority of coffee in the US is consumed in the morning. Actually, water, from tap and bottle, wins the popularity contest. The English, the most whitest people on the planet, favor tea. The biggest coffee drinkers are Asians, and cities like Seoul are resplendent with coffee shops. But like the person says, about five comments earlier, these articles are generalizations based on one person’s observations of overprivileged upper middle class whites. My guess is that the authors of this blog live near some really exclusive well-scrubbed white community near LA, Chicago or NYC with lots of soccer moms, recent college grads, and classic yuppie types, and since the hate they feel towards whites prevents them from forming friendships with white people, they haven’t actually gotten to personally know any white people. To the writers of this blog, white people are some ugly, uniform caricature.
Thats true about white people calling coffee something other than the word “coffee.”
I used to work at a starbucks and I got confused alot with these coffee terms because I’m young, kids my age dont drink too much coffee and I had parents that aren’t native to the country. so coffee terms were not tought to me. The first one I remember was “can I get a redeye?”
I responded, “Thats not on the menu.” My boss yelled at me.
How can anyone entertain the idea FOR EVEN A SECOND that the peopl who write this blog are not white??? It’s actually not hard to figure out if you click around on the page, people…
Funny because I LOVE coffee but I don’t need it. I just love the way it tastes. Have you done an entry on coffee shops yet? Coffee shops – sigh. People pretending to study but really they’re checking everyone out.
Hmm… I think the ideal follow-up to this entry would one on oxygen. Really, ALL white people are totally into it. Some even go so far as to act as though they’ll die without it. Others are so into it that they even take it with them when they go swimming underwater. As if there isn’t an ample supply several feet above them (maybe that air for the common folks just isn’t good enough for them).
Sinfanti….Brilliant!!
I think things are becoming a step above starbucks now. instead of supporting the big chain coffee dealer, it’s trendier to go to more obscure cafes where the lights are dimmer and people talk about how they’re torn between hilary and obama.
i <3 middle class california
>> TwinkieInDenial
This is absolutely true now, this falls back on “Indie Cred.” Here in this college town the two most “underground” coffee places to be and be seen are places like “Black Dog Coffee” (Which offer exclusively Free Trade blends) and the Holy Grail, “All Saints Coffee.” This place is full furnished with antique furniture, fully populated by “hipsters” and the biggest key, open 24 hours.
On another note, I’m waiting for the entry on Diet Coke. I and many fellow white people find Diet Coke just as crucial as oxygen. Its all the pleasures of Coke without the guilt of Sugar and Calories. This also falls into white peoples addiction on caffeine.
Diet Coke may be white. But here is something whiter: Coke made with real sugar, not corn syrup, imported from Mexico (supposedly organic). There is an organic, local produce restaurant in the city that serves it.
I have never been there, yet, but I heard from a fellow member of the white race that the Coke is organic too! I bet it is $5 dollars a bottle.
Is all of this white or just elitist/classist? Or are they same thing?
I might be wrong, but I thought soda with corn syrup isn’t available in Mexico or anywhere else, except the US because of subsidies to agri-business.
you omitted to mention that mexican coke tastes sooo much better than american coke, and it is because of the real sugar!!and in california,it is not more expensive. white it may be..
Yes, Africans invented coffee, but white people adopted it. It’s the same with the green tea craze right now . . . I’m Asian and have been drinking it and gen mai cha my entire life, but now all the white people are drinking it because it’s healthy and helps them lose weight . . . ridiculous.
I’m white and I hate coffee and Starbucks…join me.
How in the world is money not up here..white people LOVE money
Ok… it’s not just Coffee… EXPENSIVE COFFEE!!!
So what if we like coffee? Should stop because we’re white?
Whatever, its good and i love it.
Hrm, it seems many people who comment on your blog are utterly and completely unfamiliar with satire. Weird.
Ha ha…yes we do enjoy our coffee
Coffee – it’s the trendy white people drug of choice. Since most white people dont do real drugs anymore, they have transferred their addictions to the coffee bean and the many flavor variations. Just like the heroin in the 80’s-90’s and the marijuana of the 90’s-2000’s, each strain gets it’s own exotic name/blend.
Darn right we need coffee. I was a late bloomer when it came to drinking the stuff, but now I can’t function properly without it. I’m like a zombie until I make the morning coffee run. I think it has to do with being at work more than anything, I never drink it on the weekend. All Hail Coffee for getting me through the workday!
Im white, but I despise white culture. I am married to a black woman and I dont like mainstream society. I think my people are sheep, and I cannot relate to any of them. I think the world is force-fed white culture, white history, & white music. Im an avid punk-rock, metal, hip-hop,blues, motown,r&b fan. I choose to go against the grain on “Whiteisms” and I wish more people would.
This world would be a much better place.
Oh yeah, and coffee sucks!!!
Finger
PazPraSempre:
You love punk and metal and yet you say you hate white culture? How silly.
you sound very white by decrying your own whiteness — brilliant
This is so SPOT ON. You know what I would really LOVE…
WHITE COFFEE!!!.
That way I could drink twenty gallons a day and not have to keep buying those damn teeth whiteners.
Other beverages should also be white.. With caffeine so although there is sprite / 7up, that is useless in my world. Red Bull is a good concept but a little too toxic for daily consumption in the a.m. per my preference…also not good with expensive sandwiches or salads. White Coffee YES..now make it happen UCLA grads.
[...] #1 Coffee: “But I promise you that the first person at your school to drink coffee was a white person. You could kind of tell they didn’t enjoy it, but they did it anyways until they liked it – like cigarettes.” [...]
word! my boss is arab and i am white. we work in a cafe…. i keep telling him that all these white people who keep moving into the neighborhood will pay extra for “fair trade” coffee b/c they think they’re making a difference….. then they don’t really have to do anything but buy coffee….. And this is what is so!
I read the post..found it amusing..find it true..90% of it. My first thought..I didn’t realize that White people had so much of their own ‘cultural diversity’ but the issue isn’t about having or not having cultural diversity..its about..seeing the world..consisting of people..individuals..who have two eyes..two ears..etc..we are all human..we all act stupid sometimes..and we all have our class differences..but at the end of the day..you can’t get butthurt..jus cuz someone pointed out an obvious thing..about your culture..hell..i wish i’d get a dollar..every time someone impersonated an indian person..talkin like raaa-ta–teeh toh or…beggin me to do the apu accent….or ask me questions about my cultural upbringing..etc…i don’t get butthurt..cuz thas part of my culture….their is a reason why indians talk that..or think like that..now if a white/black/brown/other person..was raised in a geographical environment..different..than the ones they knew [as in the land of their Ancestors]..you would these individuals..NOt sharing the same attitudes..as their white counterparts..living elsewhere..being raised by different cultural norms..
The Human Family – Caucasian [European, Indian]
Black [African]
Oceanic [Malanesian, Micronesian, Polynesian
Australian Aboriginal]
Mongolian {Asian, Native American]
Out of these groupings..I fall under the Asian Category..just because it’ devised in a way..to fill the gap by grouping as a whole..the remaining..nonwhite..african..or oceanic persons]
Since different geogrphaic climate and material conditions have shaped the peoples of this world..its no wonder..why our physical bodies..look dissimilar…ie an Eskimo..short and bulky…is better suited to survive in a colder climate..and tall and lanky African person.. is better suited for a hotter climate..one conserves heat..the other repels….texture in skin changes as a result..more layers..for an Inuit from the Artic..and less subcontenous layers of skin on an African… and being a nomadic species…we’ve traveled the world..only to not understand our own biodiversity…as a species..only focused on the surface…but upon closer inspection..we are able to see why an asian person has widerspread eyes..while an caucasian..does not..or why a caucasion has less melanin..than a noncaucasion…is it our genes..and our environment…and we need to be more accepting of each other..because we are part of this vast global economy..that in the coming days of globalization..our differences..will become more apparent..yet our behaviors..will be more similar.
The reality is..we close our eyes..intentionally..we are reluctant to change..because change..upsets the balance..we’ve longed to create..and its because of our own..limitations..that the eyes of ethnocentrism..continue to deceive us..and probably the only thing..stopping us from coming together..as a unified human race…
I agree with what I think you are trying to say…
However, the little dots…after every thought…take away from the point…you are making…
Sunroofs for their cars
and
Peanut Butter with Chocolate (ugh!)
I agree, peanut butter and chocolate – ugh!
However, peanuts and pork is good to me, possibly because as a kid I found that peanut butter and bacon go together. There are Thai and Puerto Rico dishes made with pork and peanut sauce. Really worth eating.
A black friend of mine said she is the only black nurse of 35 nurses in her unit and drinks coffee due to peer pressure.
star bucks is cheaper than dunkin donuts. just so you know. and coffee is from HISPANIC and AFRICAN countries. just so you know.
i dont like coffee
I’m sitting here drinking a shade grown, fair trade, cup of African coffee (land of a thousand hills) laughing my butt off! Well done.
White people always become over zealous about EVERYTHING to the point it becomes white and people forget the orgins of things…like coffee…which is very much a part of “ethnic” cultures. I used to work in a coffee shop and white people love the ordering process even when they don’t understand what it is they are ordering. I don’t know how many times I’ve had to explain that cappuccino is mostly foam when they would complain they did not get enough of expresso/milk! Love this site!
[...] are so empty as to be translucent) do not exhibit the attributes above. Black people do not like coffee, Apple products, to study abroad, bicycles, or recycling. Black, yellow, red, brown, and purple [...]
bahahaha, all these serious comments on here by corny whites, are way funnier than the actual blog entries.
Funny, I’m a non coffee drinker and one of two Black guys in an office with about 12 Whites where the coffee machine works more than our copier and fax machine. The are Dunkin Donuts freaks. Every month it’s an issue when our boss asks my coworker to pick up coffee at the Dunkin Donuts near his house. Anyway, today Dunkin Donuts is having a special since Starbucks will be shutting down for three hours for training but nobody likes Strarbucks coffee for some reason or the other.
Anything but Caribou Coffee, which is owned by the Politically Incorrect company, Arcapita.
I can’t decide if this website is amusing because it is so completely wrong, or because everyone seems to think it is dead on.
Coffee is definitely one of the things that I loveth!!!
Things White people like:
White people love writing/reading about what white people love.
Well Coffee, we wake up everyday and my husband I take turns to make the coffee and bring to the bed room, (yes we do have a timer, but sometimes forget to get the coffee ready for the next morning. BUT the most important thing is having the 1/2 and 1/2 for the coffee. We do use 2 % milk in the house, and when there is no 1/2 & 1/2 my husband says it turns the coffee gray(yuk)
Coffee is a great invention. thanks for reading my BLOG.
New York says bye and GOD BLESS THE WORLD.
Most of the things pointed out here are what I would consider wrong with white people. Aside from liking the water and beer, most of the “stuff” is liberal garbage. Nothing iritates me more than a politically correct, led by the nose white person. Except black people who think they know what they are talking about.
1) White people don’t actually really like coffee, they like starbucks which actually tastes like used dishwashing water, but they look cool drinking coffee so they managed to come up with 1001 crap methods of diluting it so you don’t actually have to taste any coffee.
2) A lot of other non-white races like coffee (Arabs/Mediterraneans in general etc…) its just that you have noticed coffee drinking because East Asians don’t really like it (because they prefer to drink yellowy tasteless warm water and call it tea).
White people love talking about how many rounds of golf they played last year. White people love making jokes about what bad golfers they are. White people love checking on their stocks. White people love refinancing their homes. White people believing they are poorer than they really are.
Coffee was a great pick for #1. I’ve been drinking it every day since elementary school…
I want to drink coffee now, but I won’t get to sleep. Maybee I’ll have a microbrew.
i’m so white, my mom makes sure to always give me coffee for holidays (and my boyfriend too, if i have one at the time)!
[...] lastly, because I just can’t take it anymore, let’s talk about coffee. I do not have anything to add to [...]
Wow, I’m so white!
Really white people love ultra gourmet coffee – forget microbrew, now it is microroast…mmm. When we consume our microroast at home, we also love following microscopic instructions on how to care for each bean to make the perfect pot of French Press.
White people also love to catalog and rank the best coffeehouses and microbrews on the world wide web : http://www.coffeeratings.com/.
I am one of the whitest people I know and have never had a drop of coffee in my life. It smells great but tastes like crap and I am allergic to caffeine. I have always felt like a freak and have had several white people ask me how I can get up in the morning without coffee – very easily when you have never had an addiction to it. I also bond more with other people who do not drink coffee.
I drink coffee cause im gangsta like that
I love coffee. I’m white. My wife has never had a cup of coffee. She’s a Canadian. Oh: white, too. We live in a cold place. Lots ‘o white about.
I’d like to point out the inconsequential fact that I sell both fair trade and non-fair trade coffee. Both are a dollar 50. Also 90% of the asians DO buy iced white mochas. No matter how long they stand in line pretending they don’t know what they want.
there could never be a website called “Stuff Black People Like” cause it would consists of 5 things, Fried Chicken, Grape Drink, White Woman, Watermelon, and Not Havin A Job.
Maybe I didnt read enough reponses, but you guys didnt even bring up coffee preparation at home. White ppl must grind up whole beans, then either use a french press or the drip method. We cant use those inferior methods of a machine or a percolator. Also, why didnt you bring up the importance of Espresso?? I thought it was common knowledge that we all have espresso makers. I thought you guys knew white ppl!!!!
White people love earnestness.
White people love self-righteousness.
White people love to take offense before seeking to understand the source of said offense and then earnestly, and self-righteously explain why they are offended.
White people who hate white culture are the whitest people of all.
Anyone needing a refresher on the definition of ‘whiteness’ (which includes a healthy percentage of those commenting I’m afraid), please see post #16 by Rudi.
You know what you should add? Another entry called “#***: White people love to pretend they don’t like things that white people like”.
That dude up toward the top who said “I’m white and I don’t like coffee” is a lying cue-ball.
GO AGAINST THE STATUS QUO MAN!
DONT TAZE ME BRO!
mmmmm…oh sweet nectar of the gods!
this blog is brilliant, though it should be called ‘Stuff White Liberal Americans like’. It all fits my flaming liberal sister in San Fransisco perfectly, but doesn’t fit us white people on the other end of the spectrum, commonly referred to as ‘white trash’ by said flaming liberals. To get you started, we like stuff like football, nascar, cowboy boots, trucks, guns, beer, our mommas and Jesus. Although we do like coffee too.
*slurp* What’s all this business about white people and coffee? *slurp*
So let me get this straight — all these lists are absolutely law, and anyone white should be ashamed of it. Okay. Is there anything besides snide, ironic carping that can make up for institutional racism, or is this it?
I ask because I recognize not white people in these lists, but some white people. But then, that’s the point, right? By seeing that, I’m supposed to be reminded that white people have been doing just that to non-white races (and even Italians, Irishmen, Poles and actual Caucasus caucasians like Arabs and Hebrews) for centuries.
Reaffirming stereotypes is okay, so long as it’s not from the white perspective, and it’s done comedically (that’s Carlos Mencia’s whole career, isn’t it?).
I’m clearly too dense to understand why these lists are anything more that mildly amusing (and in fact, they get old quickly), and I know I’m going to be pilloried for even posting (ooh, look, whitey’s perplexed!), but seriously — these lists are clever, but hardly emblematic.
And before anyone asks, yes, I talk this way all the time, and yes, I am white.
Does anyone know why Mormans do not drink coffee?
My organization is starting a class action lawsuit against Starbucks for getting so many people addicted to their product. If anyone wants to get in on this we’re having a meet up at 3pm (we’re unemployed) tommorrow night outside of the Starbuck’s on 125th St. We figure that even if we lose in court, Starbucks will give of free bags of coffee and we can sell those on the train to white people. Were dried up our free supply of M&M Peanuts.
[...] In light of this, I feel REALLY GOOD about promoting Land of a Thousand Hills Coffee here. Apparently it’s [...]
All my white friends love coffee
I’ll display my whiteness by over analyzing this site but I think whats being made fun of here is not ‘white people’ in particular, its progressive liberals who think they are so edgy and non-conformist when they are really so stereotypically common and predictable that its funny. Basically, the ‘anti-establishment’ crowd has become the establishment
Recliners, beer, and TV
This site blows my mind. It’s clear from reading the comments that one of the things that white people like is this blog. Which is really meta. Which white people also like. White people love this blog and they love the very fact that they love this blog.
Wow! I must be white. but i’m not. i guess i should go find a bucket of chicken.
[...] My Defense I only use my Brita water filter when I’m making coffee using my French [...]
coffee is black- therefore it’s for black people
I brew Starbucks coffee at home, but I don’t like going there. After reading the blog and the comments I feel I’ve been taking my whiteness for granted by not displaying “white-like” behavior for the world to see, or maybe on a subconscious level I’m ashamed of my white ways (over analyzing… illogical…how white).
I’d have to disagree with this one. Coffee is a major Ethiopian staple and is rooted in tradition and culture (mainly because it was discovered there)
Starbucks and its overcommercialization may have been a “white” thing, but coffee itself isnt.
Mind you, this blog is about things that are prominent in white culture, not just things that originated in it.
[...] Read Full Post » [...]
Wow, could you IMAGINE how much blacks would get pissed off at this site if it was the other way around…I love how blacks can get away with this crap, but if a white guy was to do it, all hell would break lose, even in all the jails…where most black people are!
HERE’S ANOTHER GENERALIZATION (AND THIS SITE IS PROOF OF IT):
Americans and others from the western world (black, white, etc.) make generalizations about the whole human race based entirely on their own insular ignorance about the rest of the world.
By “white people” you mean whites in the US or other western countries.
Go to Latin America, and the generalizations on this blog fall flat. EVERYBODY drinks coffee in Latin America — Brazil is 70% brown and black and they drink coffee all day long. Never heard a white Latin American say “you don’t want to see me in the morning before my coffee!”
You black and white Americans should get out more.
You oh so superior europeans should get a sense of humor, unless you are German in which case never mind .
[...] shop that has better coffee than any Starbucks I’ve been to. It’s freakin heaven. Btw, did I mention I liked designer coffee?(seriously though, visit that link, AFTER you read mine… it’s the freaking funniest [...]
The comments on this blog are way funnier than the blog itself…
and btw I french press my fair trade coffee EVERY morning-how white is that..?
I want to try that Coffee that Jack Nicolson made famous in “The Bucket List”.
You know.
The kind that passes through a tree climbing cat first then washed out of the excrement and roasted.
What is it called?
I think black people invented that especially for white people.
I’m not realizing it until now, but coffee is a white people drink. I rarely ever see black people drinking coffee. Never would see one in a coffee shop. Why is it that I am following this stereotype in liking coffee. I hate myself. Well, people that say they “need” coffee in the morning are ridiculous and just need to quit being pansies. Wake up!! That food to the right over there looks delicious.
Your are all a bunch of fucking racists, especially the idiots that created this website. What the hell is wrong with you people? We live in a multicultural world – White, Black, Brown, Yellow, who fucking cares? Why do you need to draw attention to the color of someone’s skin and then categorize them accordingly? What does it have to do with anything?
I’m white. I don’t drink coffee, I hate expensive sandwiches, and I have no problem drinking tap water. Nothing I do or anyone does has ANYTHING to do with skin color – it has to do with where we grow up, the culture/religion we experienced, and the social environment(s) that shaped us. Skin color is an excuse to segregate humans into artificial categories. Spend 3 months in the sun and guess what? Your skin color is different! So, by your logic that means that based on that color, I’m inclined to act differently.
That’s the worst reasoning I’ve ever heard, and I seriously hope you didn’t go to a University because if I were the Dean of that University, I’d tear up your degree and shit on it.
You all sound like my idiot bassackwards grandfather who seems to be able to relate the phrase ‘the jews’ to everything you can possibly imagine from the state of football to rationalizing to himself that he’s too old, senile, and out of touch with reality to know who Tom Petty is. His pride and his denial cause him to blame that on someone – usually ‘the jews’. Whoever created this site is no better than him. Shame on you.
Read a book or something. Or turn off your idiot box – all that reality TV is melting your brains and inhibiting your ability to think properly.
Man, imagine if knowing who Tom Petty is was the standard for measuring senility…
don’t know if someone else already mentioned it…but for southern whitefolx, it’s all about the diet coke!
this website is hilarious. people that take it seriously need to remove whatever is stuck up their ass and move on.
peace and respect.
>>this website is hilarious. people that take it seriously need to remove whatever is stuck up their ass and move on.
>>peace and respect.
HAHA this is totally funny. First, he insults you, then he says, “Peace and Respect”
Wotta Moroon!
This is pretty funny stuff. Racy, yes, but funny nonetheless. However, the blade cuts both ways so you have to consider what the site would be like if, even in light hearted humor, it focused on black/mexican/asian people.
What, I think, makes this different from how it’s characterized the more angry comments is that it’s probably written by white people… or a some combination of folk that includes white people. I don’t know that others would be able to capture the humor as well. Or I could be totally wrong.
“…characterized BY the…”
@#14: “You know what else is white? Making a list about white people.”
Ha ha too true.
I’ve started 4 blogs in the past year and combined they haven’t got the hits you have. You are golden.
This was a lame blog.
I got one: White people like to breathe air, and sometimes a nice drink of cold water!!!
So us “Seattle-ites” must be some of the whitest people ever since there’s a freakin’ coffee shop on just about every corner! And if you live outside the city-limits, we have these nifty little drive-thru coffee huts…
I live in Philadelphia and have worked 6am shifts at Whole Foods market for 2 years straight. I have NEVER read something so true in my entire life.
racism..
drinking coffee ( hot or cold ) doesn’t depend to any individuals.. ( black or white )
it depend on the taste of a person..
taste of food…
taste of drinks…
type of food…
type of drinks..
etc…
it is not based in the color.. type.. race of and individuals…
its just common sense…
This website is ridiculously funny. Anyone who is offended or taking it so seriously is missing the point. It’s just observations.
You know, the show Seinfeld could have run forever with material like this.
This is genius and I love it. It agrees with all my stereotypes of white Americans.
Can you do one for white British people as well? I love them.
I’m Irish (genuine Irish, grew up in Ireland – gains many brownie points) and I love making them feel guilty because their ancestors oppressed by ancestors.
I’m white
Yes, I am white & I love coffee. Now that I think of it none of the nonwhite people in my office drink coffee. I always thought no coffee was what made them so backstabbing & cranky. Maybe it is something else……
What about us white people who hate coffee? I thought I was one of the “selected few” who can’t stand to drink it but more and more I am meeting other people (white of course) who don’t drink it either. Now I do drink tea-hot or iced so is that a “white thing” too?
Now, what gives me a morning jolt is the 95 cent X-Large Diet Coke from McD’s. Apparently this is only available where I live (in St. Louis) because I have been to other parts of the US and the workers look at me like I am from Mars if I ask them if they have that special.
Give me coffee and no one gets hurt.
is this saying that black people are too cheap to buy (good) coffee?
New #1
Pretending that we really like Black people.
I heart Loaded Diaper’s comment!
I am totally amazed by white people’s crazed need for coffee. I could never stand it but where I work I am in charge of making sure the coffee is stocked and the machine is working and people have for real almost physically harmed me if something interferes with their consumption of coffee. Insanity!
I think the only item I can see missing from the list would be:
Exaggerated importance of reading as seen by reading deep literature and frowning on material such as Popular Mechanics and using that info to actually fix something;
as well as reading “the book” before going to see “the movie” just so you can walk out of the theater saying the book was much better.
white power! oh brother…trolled!
[...] in their brevity rather than having to muck through 20 paragraphs for a punchline. Tragically, this one was written about me. Robots from the future like coffee [...]
Hahaha! Love it! They forgot Organic too…has to be organic and have some f’ed up name like Sumatran Summer Blend or Peruvian High Mountain Indian Roast.
Poor, poor white people…always drinking that coffee stuff…and you too poor non-white people….always thinking about the white people all day and all night.
Suckers!!!
I am getting full on all the people getting pissed off over these truly entertaining blogs!!!
PS. How about Beer, we love beer more than coffee. Give us credit for it now!!!
It seems like white people like just about everything from this site…
Coffee sucks shit. And so does this blog. And so does america and its obsession with race. And so does my mouth on a delicious milkshake. I drink your fucking milkshake. I DRINK IT UP.
Hm. Was that a ‘There Will Be Blood’ reference? If so, Penis, I love you.
I drank 1/2 a cup so far this year.
I guess this site is kind of funny, here and there.
I live in America and yeah, Starbucks makes me want to cringe when I’m reminded at how they’ve fucked up a simple thing like a cup of coffee. I watched the Cuban bakery, pros at making a delicious cafe con leche (and that’s with whole milk, thanks) in my gentrifying neighborhood get terrorized by people who order their retarded shit at Starbucks. You know the type – fat people in SUVs ordering coffee-shakes at over 1000 calories each. mmm.
I want to punch people in the head when they get all bent out of shape when the Cubanos aren’t interested in replicating what they’re used to getting at Starbucks. Now THAT’s white. “You don’t have lo-fat soy??? What am I going to drink then? Whaaaa!”
But in reading the responses to this posting, it just shows that most people don’t travel the world much. To wit, you sound like a bunch of village idiots. Get out more.
Interesting…funny…and much of it very well written. A tip of the hat, there. But shouldn’t people just go ahead and like whatever it is they like? Do we actually have to worry about the cultural relevance of it all? Is it really any different to be one who says ‘You do NOT want to see me before my morning apricot nectar…’? It seems to me that most of us are just trying to do the best we can to get from today to tomorrow in whatever quirky little world we live in. And some worlds are pretty quirky. I’m in favor of people doing whatever it is that they feel they need to do. Coffee…bottled water…shots of vodka…whatever. I hope it all works out for you…
@67(eriquia): “[the things white people like that don't come from "white" places:]
…
4) Oil
…
and the oil thing…well, we don’t have to go there….”
I’m going there, and I’m starting by saying Fuck You. Unless you grow all of your own food, produce your own electricity, and never use anything that has to be shipped to get to you, that oil is largely responsible for your quality of life. That’s not a white thing, that’s an EVERYBODY thing.. until we can come up with something better.
Being an asshole on the internet is one thing, but feeling so secure in your fucking moral superiority when you aren’t even aware of the basic requirements of your lifestyle is spectacularly dense.
This is bull. I’ve been very white for 49 years. And I think there might be 5 things I Identify with. Talk about sterotyping.
My mom is Hispanic and loves her coffee. My dad is white and hates it. Haha
The responses are almost as good as the posts. I like the serious ones… using the power of the internet to fight racism! Woohoo! Jeez, some of these guys are really taking the fun out of stereotyping. And yeah, I’m a “progressive”, left-leaning, white male. I love coffee.
Check out http://pnewb.wordpress.com!
This site is a pretty bad idea. Races criticizing themselves (even tongue in cheek) make racism easier. If a Jew made a similar site, it would be constantly cited by anti-Semites. Humor should have some limits.
Sorry Matt, but this site is hilarious and is a very good idea indeed; an update of the book “The Preppie Handbook”, or a blog version of “The Official Politically Correct Dictionary And Handbook” by Henry Beard & Chris Cerf….
And you know what? Jews HAVE been doing the same thing — making fun of themselves — for scores of decades; every been to a stand-up show at a Catskills resort, or seen a Billy Crystal comedy special? Last I heard, no one’s calling him an anti-Semite…. Besides, I don’t think we have a term for “Anti-Liberal-WASP”, do we?
coffee is ghetto, i like toast
coffee is ghetto and i like toast
White people like coffee. But we don’t like Starbucks. We just don’t. People have hated Starbucks since before it moved to my NorCal area. Maybe people in Seattle like Starbucks but it has always been scorned and ridiculed by every white person I’ve known.
A few years back, I regularly participated in an online, mostly white discussion group. People from all over the USA and Canada participated. One of the (white, Denver area) people on the group loved Starbucks and was naive enough to say so. Her status in the group dropped immediately. It was like “Ew! That is sooooo uncool.” I don’t think she’s ever recovered her prior semi-hip, likable image.
Some of the white preteens and teens in my area frequent the local Starbucks. (It was embarassing when one opened in my town. OMG, what’s next? A strip mall?) But the mostly buy tea and non-coffee products. I think that Starbucks is considered cool in middle school. In high school, going to Starbucks considered neutral (neither cool nor uncool).
White adults hate, hate, hate Starbucks, just like we hate hate hate Wal-Mart. Even fair-traded, organically grown coffee is bad/evil if it’s from Starbucks. We will drink Starbucks if there is no other coffee available (or convenient). But we’d rather drink something that’s not from a conglomerate. (We will drink Peets, which is a large chain, but that’s the ONLY coffee chain that’s acceptable to say that you like.) At least we don’t have to worry about them opening a Wal-Mart near our town.
I’m fascinated by this blog. At first read, it’s hilarious. But then I started thinking a lot about the blog, what it really could be saying, and it somehow became less funny.
I have come to agree with many of the comment authors that this is not really a blog about race, it’s actually a blog about social class. NASCAR, BeautyShots, mullets, WalMart and other markers of lower “white” socioeconomic class don’t appear on this blog. Somehow, then, this blog is “okay” because the classism endemic in our lives and social constructs is the one debate that America hasn’t yet had. Many times it’s masked under the term “racism”.
A separate revelation also led me to think that this blog could easily be authored by a right-wing republican. This blog says many of the same things that the right wing fanatic radio talk show hosts would say about liberals.
I still haven’t figured out why, but all of the sudden I realized that if this blog were written by right wing fanatics, it wouldn’t be so funny to me; I’d just be mad. What is that all about? I still don’t know. But this blog does make me think.
i agree with the last post. the stuff white people dont like is little more true and cynical.
stuffwhitepeopledontlike.blogspot.com
[...] recommend starting at #1, which will allow us non-coffee drinkers to laugh and agree. We all know one of those [...]
Yes, oh yes, the coffee phenomenon. However, please be advised that our good neighbor to the North (Canada, for all of you stupids out there) may enjoy it even more. Not only do they have Starbucks, Second Cup, etc, etc…but the holy grail of java houses — TIM HORTONS.
And, trust me, it is enjoyed by all. White, black, yellow, purple. Whatever tint your skin is, you will drink Tim Horton’s coffee.
- re. coffee cultures: Arabs and Italians are white.
- If the author realizes that everyone likes coffee, then why write this post? Especially, why put it at number 1? Next the author will say it’s a “white thing” to like Coke and Pepsi. Pointless.
I’m not white and I prefer to purchase free-trade products too. I don’t think that spending a couple dollars more will save the world. I do think that it’s a good idea to support businesses that pay people a fair wage. I try not to shop at Walmart for the same reason.
To the guy that is like: OMGZ I MARRIED A BLACK WOMAN SO I’M LIEK BLACK MYSELF LAWLZ WHITE SUXXORZ OMGZZZ
Chill out. You like coffee, you skinny little white man who is trying to run from himself.
Did you know that just because I listen to R&B, I’m better than the average white person and all the black people love me? True story. They accepted me as their own.
I’m-a go sip some coffee now.
http://stuffdarkpeoplelike.wordpress.com
I’m white, and a lot of these things are true, which is funny.
And if this was about black people or hispanic people, it surely would be all over the news.
im half white and its weird that some things i relate perfectly too…and how some things are fuckin ridiculous.
its like there are some places where i can she the white shining through in my life
[...] #1 Coffee « Stuff White People Like March 3, 2008, 1:41 pm Filed under: Uncategorized #1 Coffee « Stuff White People Like No Comments so far Leave a comment RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI [...]
six million hits, just to tell 30 of america what they already know? Sweet deal.
PEOPLE GET A GRIP!
Thats what is wrong with the US, and everyone in it. Not politics, race, or economic-status, but your fuggin’ HUMOR!
Right now, you live in one of the best places on earth to live, and you bitch and whine and moan about everything under the sun. Be happy that you have the damned luxury of whining! And learn to laugh at yourselves!
LRN2LAFF@YURZ3LF!
“I think Starbucks is not cool anymore; if you go to a Starbucks regularly, the only way not to meet with disapproval is if there literally isn’t any other coffee place in town. But if that’s the case, you have the opportunity to add hurriedly, with a hint of frustration and apology in your tone, “I really wish we had a good local coffee shop around here, but ya know, I have to get my brew from somewhere!” Sympathy and commiseration will “ensue.”
The conundrum in my town is buy from Starbucks like a dork, or buy from the good local coffee house, whose non-white owner steals her barista’s tips and makes them work at night until everything is clean, but tries to only pay them the hours she scheduled them.
PEOPLE GET A GRIP!
“Thats what is wrong with the US, and everyone in it. Not politics, race, or economic-status, but your fuggin’ HUMOR!
Right now, you live in one of the best places on earth to live, and you bitch and whine and moan about everything under the sun. Be happy that you have the damned luxury of whining!
And learn to laugh at yourselves!”
Spoken like a trued white girl…either Republican or one of those humorless liberals who are too busy trying to make everything fair and PC to crack a smile.
This place is a hoot. I’m not white, but I imagine the disgruntled are offended because either: a)it is true. But they may feel too evolved or embarrassed by having petty/materialistic or imagery behaviours realized. Most of these properties/behaviours are accurate for the nouveau riche and/or the ones enslaved to metropolis. b)they may feel left out. Probably a cashflow problem obstructing the attainment of this lifestyle. Expendable income always purveys luxuries, both material and immaterial.
I haven’t read every entry, but I hope there’s one mentioning the official uniform–a $300 pair of weathered/embellished jeans manufactured by some “underground” designer mentioned in all the latest fashion magazines, a $200 “vintage” tee shirt with graphics (probably displaying an eagle or a guitar or any farouche rock star inspiration), and of course, the luxury designer aviator sunglasses. Fashion magazines are like their Bibles. They have to be on top of it in order to know what to do next.
No no Wrong.
EUROPEANS love COFFEE and drink it as enjoyment
WHITE PEOPLE LOVE STARBUCKS (pretentious, overpriced, appears foreign)
big difference, Europeans drink normal coffees and White people drink caramel-mocha–latte grande (which is “european inspired”, but non existent in europe)
has anyone else noticed how ridiculous the concept of “chai tea” is? chai literally means tea. so when you order a chai tea at your local starbucks (or the one within 100 feet of you), you are essentially asking for a “tea tea”, effectively making you a moron. imagine how much time would be saved if we just asked for a tea.
I love coffee — check! I have said “you don’t want to see me…” — check! I drank it in middle school — check! HOWEVER — I avoid fair-trade anything, because deep down, I just don’t give a rat’s ass about anybody who doesn’t think and look like me.
Oh, and I also love WalMart.
I’m Brazilian and I love coffee. Does that make me whiter than I already am even though here in the US I’m, hispanic yet have no Latin blood? It’s good to be part of the American Dream. I’ll now leave the office and have my coffee or my chai. Later I’ll go ride my bike in my leafy suburb and enjoy the good life. I love apple pie too.
Actually, my dad had the expression that cofee was:
El nectar negro de los dioses blancos …. lol…
Funny stuff!!
http://blinditemsreveal.blogspot.com/
It’s true! Coffee is good!! Starbucks is great.
- http://wweadam.com
[...] musicians, urban hipsters and all their ridiculous obsessions. Some other amusing topics include: Coffee; Barack Obama; Bottled Water; Asian Girls; and Multilingual Children. [...]
…to the obviously NOT “black guy” at comment 133 (who apparently just copped his list from a Dave Chappelle episode and a minstrel show repertoire): there already are top 10 and 20 lists of stuff black people like on the ‘net written by ACTUAL black people, such as:
http://cobb.typepad.com/cobb/2008/02/stuff-black-peo.html
my favorite on that list is “hair preparations” – i have 7 half-used jars of the stuff (scalp dressing, hair growth oils, etc) sitting under my bathroom sink as i speak…i especially love my coconut oil/vanilla/almond/honey/sun-ripened raisin blend
)
**[a close second from another website is "finding out a criminal is not black": that's right, gotta love those white serial killers! and the black DC snipers one may ask? i admit shocking, but b*tch pleez! that was a total fluke, he and that brainwashed kid barely count...]
which brings me to “big red” at comment 154: wow. did you seriously think this blog was written by anyone else except a white person? and if you had intended even the tiniest bit of sarcasm in your comment–>poorly executed.
So I am out with my Japanese BF for lunch yesterday and he sees a placard on the table for iced coffee. He says, “I love iced coffee!” I order a capp with extra foam.
I hate black people. I think that they stink and are no good. I am proud to be white and classy! I think the only thing blacks are good for is servitude.
I was the first person I know to drink coffee… I started when I was 6. I’m Puerto Rican, it’s tradition.
There was a question earlier up there about where’s the reference to white trash, but the point is moot, the rednecks that can actually read are usually incapable of operating a machine any more complex than a coin-operated washer. Of course, this is counting Ford Mustangs and F150s, which are less complex than your average coin-op laundry equipment. However, Poster # 230 has apparently been shown how to Blog (probably by the Asian he buys his reports from, or the Jew that does his taxes). It just goes to show that if you think all blacks are good for is servitude, you should chill out and buy a bag of weed from one. I mean blacks good for servitude? Been there, done that, ended badly!! Learn from history!
I mean as true as all this is, it’s supposed to be fun, and being mean-spirited is not OK, nor is it PC at all. I have to go to Starbucks and stand in line talking about my 2000 import sedan so I will have no idea what I want, and will have to make the Guatamalan waiter do what he has to, which is wait for MY white ass!!!
Yeah, I admit it. Being white is pretty fucking awesome. I’m riding out this white privilege wave for as long as I can.
Coffee replaced the blood in my veins and the air I breathe. How people can walk, think, or eat without this devine gifts from the heavenly gods is beyond me.
just got done reading the entire list, and i’ve come to a startling revelation. i might be white.
i don’t know how i feel about this. i’m black (by skin color only, of course), i grew up n “da hood”, i lived in a single-parent home most of my life, but this list definitely has me asking, “what the feezy, my neezy?”
- i’m in grad school
- i like mos def
- i like the outdoors
- i have black friends
- i know more about YOUR culture
- i work for a non-profit
- i love coffee
ohh,
- i also want to give it to sarah silverman
I love coffee more than any other white person around me. : /
I think I need help.
Adolf, go home.
You all should see Gilmore Girls, Sex in the City, or pretty much any other such sitcom that has a LOT of white people on screen, and you see this unnatural addiction to coffee…to the point of belligerence. I’m not hating, really, I’m not, I’m just saying that this is so true! lol.
Although my friend from Ethiopia is also addicted to coffee. Their coffee is legit, though, not tainted with the blood and tears of underpaid workers, no matter how “fair trade” Starbucks claims to be…
Whoa! (word from Oxford white dictionary), Great stuff, but you left out the old school working class white guy who, while actually living on coffee, will say things like, “Can I get a G_D_ cup of plain Amurican coffee!” or “I ain’t payin’ 2 bucks for a G_D_ cup of coffee, how much to refill my mug?”
[...] and humor go together. There is no explanation for it, they just do! Take this post that Clander wrote on Stuff White People Like. It just cracked me [...]
Definitely agree with a PP that it’s much more White to tell the guy next to you in the line at Starbucks that of course Peets is vastly superior, and how you’re so excited that they’re spreading beyond the little coffee shop you used to hang out in in SF in the good old bohemian days, and ho you need one in your town.
I love coffee but had to give it up due to kidney stones…
I’ve never actually met anyone who calls it anything other than coffee. I’m actually a caf. addict, it’s not the coffee. Though, I don’t do coffee, I do espresso.
Well, I really like coffee and I don’t really know a lot of white people that like coffee. All my white friends are into tea… except, I’m half asian. Oops. Guess I don’t add to the stereotype.
drug addicts
I only drink coffee (and I call it “coffee” even though I’m a “white guy”)(actually that’s not true, I’m more of a “peachie”) so I can stay awake longer and smoke more Pall Malls. I prefer Yuban or Maxwell House, but Hills Bros. will do. I don’t care much for Starbucks’ coffee and I really don’t care for their prices.
I started drinking heavily when I was in the Air Force.
Drinking coffee and smoking Pall Malls are best done whle you are on “break”.
Since “break” is one of my best work skills, it follows that I drink a lot of coffee and smoke a lot of Pall Malls.
[...] Coffee [...]
Whats with all the generalizing?
Is all this to say that other than white people do not like these things?
I thought this was quite interesting. Though I have to admit, I’m white and I HATE! Coffee.
I love Iced Tea though.
I drink crap coffee. But, it’s crap coffee I MUST drink.
Great, great site. I’m starting at ground zero and working my way up. But, I did notice Flight of the Conchords and yes, I am white and enjoy songs like, “It’s Business Time.”
my roomie is cuban, but she was raised in a pretty white place, so her family is basically white people who tend to do cuban things, not the other way around.
she drinks so much coffee, sometimes she comes into the room and just tells me stories about how much she was shaking that day. she’s like “i’ve been working on my model [architecture major] for the passed 23 hours and i haven’t slept in 29 hours and even then i only got like…2 hours of sleep. i’ve had 3 cups of coffee and my hands just keep shaking. i can’t make it stop!”
she’s hilarious. she’s pretty white…which i can now confirm, considering how many things on this list i KNOW she loves…like “juno” and throwing grammy & oscar parties and modern furniture and bottles of water.
even ethnic people who absorb “white people tendancies” love the same things white people like. i love how this works..
Hey Metamorphallic:
I heard vietnamese coffee was extracted from some animals feces that eats the coffee the defacates it out. Interesting. They say it has a smokey taste. Hmmmm….delicious.
Color me whiter than white. Coffee drinker since the age of 10. And, I’m going to go make a cup right now.
White. Hate Coffee, it’s nasty. @Rudi, what did you expect anonymous to say? “I hate black people! White people invented coffee not you uppity negroes! White Power!!” And since when is it all right to make generalizations about another person’s race like this? If a white person said all black people love watermelon and fried chicken, have big red lips, talk like ignorant morons and are criminals the black community would be up in arms whether it was a joke or not. They would not stop until that person was financially, socially and emotionally destroyed. They would get death threats, there would be obscene messages scrawled across their house. I guess it’s allright to be racist if you’re black though, because YOU had it so hard 400 years ago before the United States was even created and before you were born. Because of the fact that someone the present white community had no control over mistreated someone no one in the black community ever even knew, we owe you something. No, that’s not the way it works. White people do not owe minorities who’ve never even experienced mistreatment from them anything.
My goodness.
I own a coffee shop ( the Luna Bean )in Wilson North Carolina where one of my customers told me about this blog and I must say this is the funniest thing I’ve read in so long.
I’m so glad to know about this blog.
It’s so true that I’m white and eveidently very white. HAHAHAHAHA! I love to sit and talk with other coffee lovers about coffee and coffee related topics.
we can spend hours just talking about the prefect bean grinding etc… you guys rocked me with these oh so true slams.
I see so many of my customers described here as well. “Oh, I’d like a double short ristretto breve’ with a half shot of vanilla and is that vanilla from Madegascar”?
my word, what ever happened to just a cup of coffee? That would be so far beneath that customer. Sort of like a white person wanting their child to be multi-lingual.
Whats sup??!!
Okay, you guys be gentle on my comments but do have fun in any event cause I can handle it. I’m old.
Max
wait.
no white person here has mentioned our need for Shade grown or bird friendly beans? this can’t be white people replying.
Did anyone ever remember the coffee that
Jack Nicholson made popular?
Britney Spears reminds me of all white people.
STARBUCKS IS A QUAGMIRE
GO FUCK YOURSELF SEATTLE
I started drinking coffee when I joined the working world at 14.
I call it “coffee”. I prefer Yuban or Maxwell House, but Hills Bros will do.
I have been inside a Starbucks, but I don’t care much for their coffee and I REALLY don’t care for their prices.
I drink coffee so I can stay awake longer and smoke more Pall Malls.
I started drinking heavily when I was in the Air Force.
Drinking coffee and smoking Pall Malls are best done whle you are on “break”.
Since “break” is one of my best work skills, it follows that I drink a lot of coffee and smoke a lot of Pall Malls.
In response to #203 (anon): I’m white, I love Starbucks coffee, and I really don’t care what anyone else thinks about that. Why on earth do I drink Starbucks coffee when I know it makes me so uncool? Good lord, I must actually like how it tastes. Imagine that. >_> It’s really rather pathetic to base your choice in coffee shops (or anything, for that matter) on what’s “cool”. It’s even more pathetic to look down on other people who don’t particularly care what’s “cool” and what’s not.
To #43 (praxenakis): I suppose you’re not picky about anything. I don’t order a flavor shot or nonfat milk in my latte just to be picky, I do it because that’s the way I want it, because that’s how I’ll get the most enjoyment out of it. And if someone gets my order wrong, I’ll more than likely thank them as usual and not say a word about it. Also, as an indecisive person, I am indeed one of those white people who stand there looking at the options, trying to decide what exactly I’m in the mood for. However, I DON’T do while standing in line. I only actually get in line once I’ve decided what I want. So don’t you dare lump all of us together. Some of us try damn hard to be polite and considerate.
Some of you really need to get it through your heads that the vast majority of white coffee drinkers out there aren’t trying to be “cool” and “hip” with their coffee habits. We don’t go to Starbucks (or anywhere else) to be cool. We don’t grind beans to be cool. We don’t prefer one brewing method over another based on how cool they are. It all comes down to taste for most of us.
And no matter how disgusted Europeans get, some of us just love steamed milk and *gasp* flavorings with our espresso. It makes us horrible human beings, and we know that. We just don’t care. I should mention that I’ve been to Europe, and I’ve tried the whole espresso thing, and I just don’t get it. It tastes horrible. If wanting my coffee to taste good makes me a weak person in anyone’s eyes, then so be it. If me dumping liquid, flavored CoffeeMate in my coffee when I brew it at home offends anyone’s delicate sensibilities, you need to get over that. I’m going to keep doing it anyway.
wow, seriously? what does being white have to do with liking these things? at least white people strive to do something with their lives. good list though, 82 reasons why white people are better than niggers. a list of “what niggers like” just wouldn’t be as fun. fried chicken, grape soda, kool-aid, watermelon, white women, and stealing my fucking car.
Sorry for my ignorance about things that white or black people like or do not like. In fact I’m trying to understand why is so important such kind of thing in lifetime. If it is not hurt anyone, if it makes part of our right of choice and nobody is obliged to, let me know where’s the sin, the fault… I suppose that is worthy searching common points than act as both wp and black had came from different world and emphasize their differences is a scientific necessity to figth against the invaders.
By the way, it’s not a constructive attitude. Where are we going? To live together or kill each other!
Anonymous 262#
I think this is supposed to be a fun site…makes me laugh and I’m white as they come….Wow, seriously? Someone has bigger issues than being white or black!
Hate coffee.
Hate it with a fiery passion. Oh, and I’m allergic to it, and I’m white.
[...] Coffee [...]
actually, 262, if you weren’t such a dick, i think black people might actually find some of those things on your list funny.
of course, now they’re just laughing at you being a dick.
How did you get away making this list? I thought blacks would have hanged you by now.
i’m white and i hate coffee.
The Turks are way more into coffee than white people. Most of the Middle East seems to prefer tea. But they call it “chai” when they say it in English.
coffee sucks
this is just one white persond opinion
mmmmm coffee,
I even keep it in my Stanley thermos, hanging on my gun rack right along with my deer rifle and shotgun, in my Ford F150 4×4, and drink it out of a Mossy Oak travel mug.
Dont take life to seriously, You’ll never get out alive.
Hmmm… sad but true. I started drinking coffee in high school, when my friends and I hung out at Denny’s, smoking cigarettes and composing collective poetry. By college, I was known for carrying a 44-oz trucker thermos cup of coffee with me everywhere I went. I often filled it up 3-4 times a day. Now I make more money and I have fresh roasted coffee shipped to me cross-country in 5-lb. bags from an organic free-trade coffee roaster in California. How far I’ve fallen; how white I’ve truly become.
No one likes you.
“Anonymous is definitely the whitest respondent on this entry. “To be fair” White people love fairness. “coffee was invented by Africans and was/has been a African/Arab thing.” Especially fairness to other races. People of colour invented coffee, get that, other whites! Not that is was stated otherwise, but anonymous must be glowing with multicultural pride by pointing out the achievements of non-whites.”
There is nothing white people like more than to point out the whiteness of other people. It makes them feel a little like they themselves are less white than other white people. There are few things that are whiter than this.
Great number one!
Hey Rudi…in response to only white people like disparaging jokes about their own race made by an ethnic minority(very white).
There is nothing I hate more than racist comedians. I hate the little white guy voice they use to deliver a line…I have never met a white guy who has this voice…do they pull you aside when you are little niglets and teach you this voice cause I know you didn’t learn it from a white guy. Oh and the white girl dance that ironically was made famous by a black character..Carlton..on The Fresh Prince.
I am white and I don’t like most black comedians for the veryreasons that you said white people did like them..hhmmm
OMG!!! Did you just say niglets…you should be strung up for saying something so horrible and racist. This is supposed to be a funny site not to get all enflamed over. Get a life whitebrite…
HAHAHAHAHA!! I think niglets is great!! Whitebrite should be allowed to say niglets and not get flamed if this blog is allowed to say crap about white people…freedom and all that
Hey!! Quit using my name. i did not give you permission to use my name. Niglet is mine and I love it. Niglet is the best name ever in the world. Niglet is tops baby!! NigletNigletNiglet
Ok, this coffee thing I understand… but what about pie?
Interesting satirical attempt at reverse stereotyping.
I don’t like coffee.
Or a lot of things on this list.
Niglets are sooooooo cute!!! I would want one if they never grew up and became rapists. Did anyone see what happened to the Auburn freshman? the UNC student body president?
The best coffee brands are “Illy” and then “Lavazza”, and pretty much everything after that is unnoteworthy, esp. starbucks which burns their beans.
this is HILARIOUS! i haven’t nearly read the whole list, but i did link to it from my blog.
my question is- should this be called “stuff white people with disposable income like”? or maybe “stuff rich white people like”?
maybe i’m just avoiding the truth by subdividing the genre. ha.
What about cutting down on coffee? That’s a pretty solid whites-only niche, more so than coffee itself I’m pretty sure. It usually leads right to tea, though, another white market.
I’m white and I love coffee, almost as much as I love my 4X4 Dodge, my deer heads on the wall, and going to the opera on occasion. And I’m a girl. The only thing I love more than all the above is my gorgeous red-headed, blue-eyed Viking son who will grow up to be white MAN just like his daddy-my husband. My son is only six and he already likes coffee and can load and shoot his very own Crickett .22-and does so accurately.
But more importantly, he loves for me to read to him and is learning to read for himself, to play computer games, and to explore this world. White people love more than anything-even coffee- to be good parents.
P.S. Amend that post to “…white people like me…” There are plenty of famous white movie people who suck at parenting and plenty more anonymous ones who suck at parenting as well. For starters, having children out of wedlock is not the best scenario for the child involved. Imagine what that child thinks-” My parents didn’t even love each other enough to try and be married. I’m not a product of love, I’m a product of horny lust. ”
But I digress…
ive been around some white people, and i am simply amazed by their ability to consume coffee at any time of the day or night. you forgot to mention white people make getting coffee a social excursion, who else but white people will say “hey lets go get some coffee.” white people also like to go to coffee shops to pick up on other white people who drink coffee. obviously drinking coffee in a coffee shop while simultaneously engaging in intellectual activities such as reading or using a laptop signifies a certain level of intelligence attractive to other white people.
Don’t you people see stuffwhitepeoplelike.com is a false idol?!!?! Second Cup? ‘Halifax’s Ellen Paige?’ who writes like that?
A big night out for a Muslim is drinking tea on a sidewalk. Ever been to a Muslim city? They seriously suck.
Here’s something else that white people like – jewellery that make a statement about who they are — http://www.jacquelinepottercollection.com
I think you miss the point. This is supposed to be stuff unique to white people. Are you suggesting that other races/ethnicities don’t care for jewelry. What color is the sun in your universe?
This list seems more like its all stuff that other races don’t like…and to me that is racist!
http://www.garbarrassing.com
for funny stuff that everyone likes…
why drink coffee when you can smoke crack? oh, wait, that’s not very white now is it?
why drink coffee when you can smoke crack? oh wait, that’s not very white now is it? oh well, as long as i can stay awake to finish watching the Full House marathon!
Ding dang. I had no idea that I was a racial stereotype. I didn’t see oatmeal on the list, though. Me and my pasty homies love us some oatmeal.
What is the difference between a messageboard and a blog?
With a msg brd people get to start their own topics but with a blog it is ruled by one person that controls all topics of conversation. Blogs are so white person-ish.
*goes to make an organic coffee while listening to indie music and planning my move to canada*.
P.s. great website.
a relatively amazing trait that westerners have.
historically speaking that is:
raid,
mould,
then enjoy.
same thing with the british and tea…
more people in the western hemisphere associate the first
instantaneous perception of “tea” with the british
than the eastern hemisphere – the historical ignorance of it all
yet somewhat amusing.
cause really… tea’s the historically “east” thing?
blah – with the blend of a world we’re in now,
gotta know what white ppl like to survive >.< nice listing.
I’m white. I was drinking coffee when I was THREE!!!! What were my parents thinking!
White people like witty blogs and the witty bloggers who blog. Clever bloggers are so cool. Like this one, for example. He is so cool. He is above-it-all. He is insouciant. He is aloof. His eyebrows become supercilious statements ten times a day. He is post-grad-school, pomo, stoner-clever as all get out. He probably can text funny quips faster than anyone. I’ll bet he has a rad facebook page. It’s hard to not like a guy like that. Some people have it all, I guess.
I fucking love him. And: yes. I am a white person.
[...] a blog that understands me. I do like shorts and t-shirts (especially Threadless)and coffee and expensive sandwiches. And all the other [...]
the need for coffee, for whites, implies the need to be productive, or better, to support their “productivity/overachieving.” it isn’t a taste thing
or a question of being a conaisseur, which answers the question why a company like starbucks could thrive.
#300:
he even predicted a post like yours and went ahead and
started blogging anyway. he is god-like in my book. while
most would have been too scared, he went ahead and did it anyway, and got this dialogue-party started.
lol this site is great….. i mean a lot of things are a bit far fetched…. but none the less they’re funny!!
The author of this site must live around a bunch of stoned fuckin’ hippie liberals.
You have my sympathy.
~ Sisyphus,
http://www.tsfiles.wordpress.com <— shameless self-promotion
I worked for Starbucks for five years. Even though I’ve been drinking coffee since I was about 12, I had not set foot into a Starbucks until I went in for my interview. Getting an endless supply of free coffee was pretty sweet, though.
I do have a word to the wise – do not piss off your barista. I can tell you horror stories.
Is Starbucks’ considered coffee? Really?? That brownish effie???
Oh, dear.
I think a lot of people are missing the point that it’s not just coffee that white people love. It’s the coffee ordering process and all the specialty coffees that are available as well.
Someone made the comment that most Brazilians drink coffee, but in Brazil, they generally drink it in only a few different variations. Someone else made the point that Duncan Donuts is more expensive than Starbucks…but the catch is that DD does not offer the variety with all the fancy (translated: foreign) words/names.
White people friggin love coffee, man! LOL. Most of my co-workers (white people) cannot function until they have coffee. As a matter of fact, most of them brew a pot before leaving the house, pick up a cup from a coffeehouse while on the way in to work, then have a cup of the office crap before finally settling in to do any work.
P.S. White people also love talking about cutting down on coffee and quitting cigarettes and going on diets. White people love talking.
[...] have been a bit forced. Posts such as the ones depicting white people’s insatiable desire for overpriced coffee, petite Asian women, and relating to “the Wire” are universally applicable. However, certain [...]
I’m cuban and so I’ve been drinking after-dinner coffee since I was about 8, as is true with many Latin-American cultures. I’ve always loved the flavor b/c we sweeten it quite a bit if having it black, or make it literally half-milk if having cafe con leche – so it isn’t an acquired taste.
HAHAHAHAHA! I love the site, I just ran across it and naturally I had to skip right down to see what the #1 item was.
And as a matter of fact, I’m going to get some coffee now. And here is another white item for you.
“I.O.U”s
I’m out of change so I will be sure to put my IOU in for $.75 and will be sure to pay it the first chance I get!
LOVE IT YA’LL! I will be linking this to my myspace page!
CHRIST BLESS!
PZ
I am as WASP as it gets yet I hate coffee, all forms and flavors of coffee. I hate coffee ice cream, coffee jelly bellies, coffee anything. While I semi-enjoy the smell of fresh coffee I loath and shudder to drink it. I’d much rather down 20 ounces of ice cold Mountain Dew at 9 AM then go through the OCD routine of the perfect cup of Joe.
I find it odd that people fill up the coffee full of cream, sugar, milk, chocolate, crack, heroin, or even the worst… coffee flavorings… just to make it ‘theirs’. People are Starbucks lemmings.
If Jim Jones had run out of Kool-aid he’d have used tall skinny mocha fraps instead.
~ out
Can we get Fluffanutter, Nutella and Mayonaise on this list?
I’m really shocked at their absense.
Ed
#306 “I do have a word to the wise – do not piss off your barista. I can tell you horror stories.”
Let’s hear’em!!!
I hate it when the white folks in front of me ordering what used to be “coffee” say they want “the drip.” It makes me want to remind them that “the drip” is Gonorrhea.
The first thing I do when I get up is get into my electric wheelchair, roll into the kitchen and make coffee. Then turn on the Today Show. A few minutes later I’m drinking a cup of Ganocafe which is a healthy coffee.
Hey, to those white people who take offense to his blog – get over it. Growing up Chinese-Canadian I’ve spent the better part of my life explaining the peculiarities of my native culture to people…..and often defending what is difficult to understand to people of “mainstream culture”. and thanks to enlightened comedians like Russell Peters and Dave Chappelle, can’t we just get over ourselves and just laugh at the oddities in our cultures? What’s wrong with non-whites making some humorous observations about white culture? Haven’t whites been making observations about non-white culture that they don’t understand for YEARS? Better yet, for centuries? This isn’t about coffee, or blogs…..it’s just about observing cultural differences in a humorous light…personally, I can’t WAIT to LMAO when the blog for “Stuff Asians Like” is up!
Yay!!!!! to Marcus, #155. North Americans (and I’m one of them – albeit of Chinese descent) – get the hell out of NOrth America and you’ll see how nothing here applies…..but still, this site is still funny as all (*(#@$#@$ !!!
That’s white folks for you…
I used to be a coffee whore but I gave it up a couple weeks ago and turned to green tea. This makes me a double victim. HA.
You should add “Dave Mathews Band”. Every white person over 30 loves DMB, and all the preps in high school. White people also love saying things like “you only get one life, live everyday like it’s your last..” when these people live their life no different than anyone else does…
they drink tea and read Nietszche while listening to Godspeed! You Black Emperor, and then they go watch Bridge on the River Kwai or Braveheart (for the 7th time)
They also love watching the news – the 5 o’clock one and the 10 o’clock one. And they watch Entertainment Tonight and things like that. and they watch movies with Morgan Freeman in it. (which shouldn’t be hard considering he’s in every damn movie). they are obsessed with knowing what the weather is going to be. and talk about it. they buy SUV’s — the men making sure it has 4 wheel drive. the men also get pissed when you leave the lights on, or leave the TV on. they get mad when you leave the door unlocked. they get mad if you leave glasses on tables. They get sweaters for their dogs. their favorite food is almost always “chinese”. every friday (or some other designated day) they always eat out. they take pride in their lawn. they do everything Hank Hill does. And they watch king of the hill. they take their cameras to any special occasion — xmas party, a trip, graduation…and after they take the pictures they stuff them in some closet somewhere and never really look at them until maybe a few years later.
white people LOVE guitar solos
Man this aint completly true, hell i’m a late-teen white and i got a lot of white friends and NONE of us drink coffee
Everything about this site is hilarious… heard about it on Drew and Mike this morning (Detroit). congrats on the success and keep it coming! oh, and i am enjoying my cup of coffee right this second…
I just received this web address the other day and have either read every entry from #87-#1, or skimmed through them….not all the blogs, just the original entry.
Anonymous blog #14, (on coffee), and reiterated by #37 & #38, above, is the best!!!!
Yes, I am white, and a lot of the 87 accusations are so true. Recyling, buying from the ‘little’ guy, eating organic, not shopping at Wal-Mart, fairness & equality, and liking Jon Stewart……thank you for the compliments, even if they are funny. Keep it up!
willis manley are you stupid or just retarded?
[...] films. Some come on the site to test there “whiteness”- with Rudi who commented on the first post in Stuff White People Like, [...]
OK, I just read through the list and it was painfully right-on, especially The Wire, the Sunday Times… and I actually own that exact water bottle. Ouch.
But anyway, what about BABIES? White people love babies, plus all the corresponding accessories.
Coffee Gross…. Smoothie king good YOU shoulda made that number one for white people.
How funny…I’m addicted to Starbucks! And it is gross…weird how that happens!
yeah, fair trade coffee sucks. It gives me one more decision to make before I’ve had my coffee.
I’m white as Steven Harper’s milky thighs, and I’m loving it. White people love to stockpile things like batteries and elastics. We like cabbage rolls, kung-fu, rugby shirts with horizontal lines, jean jackets, and jokes about domestic violence.
Be patient with us, we have spent that last several hundred years colonizing and performing genocide all over the world. It’s not as easy as it looks, we’ve stretched ourselves a little thin here. We’ll be of positive historical contribution once again when China buys North America…. then bring on the asian ladies!!!! ha ha ha
Don’t care what colour of skin you are in.
Rum is the answer to the question of coffee.
White people like coffee. Hispanic people like coffee. But Ethiopian, Somalian, Eritrian and all kinds of middle eastern people LOVE coffee. LOVE LOVE LOVE it. I used to work at a coffee bar, and they were like drunks at a regular bar, lining up at the door before we opened and having to be kicked out at the end of the day. We even had bona fide coffee bar fights. It was nuts! Those guys were amped! Tipped ALSOME, though.
Just sittin’ here on a Saturday morning, reading blogs, eating oatmeal and drinking coffee, looking for the kids’ soccer schedules, getting ready to go to Panera (the food’s much better there but cappucinos only come in one size).
PC whites don’t want to admit that the REAL reason they don’t go to Walmart is that all the Hispanics are there. They shop at Target and mockingly call it Tar-zhay’s.
Coffee is the shizzle of the manizzle Yo!
Just letting you know that in Canada, Fair Trade coffee (like local http://www.justuscoffee.com/) is, on average, $0.50 to $1.00 cheaper than Starbucks or any other multinational.
Which does make a difference.
well to be fair, it’s pretty much the one drug you can do at work… AND NOT GET FIRED FOR!! isn’t that amazing? I think so…which is why I drink coffee excessively!!!! can you tell???!!!
THANK YOU for calling white people out on saying obnoxious things like “Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee.”
How about referring to it as “leaded” or “unleaded?”
As an owner of a small independent coffee shop in Michigan I know this is a fact. To add to the growing trend, it is even cooler to get your coffee at any independent shop opposed to the big chains. Damn the Man!
Just as a side note for people that pick on this blog, the posts from other people (where they come from, how a white person corrects someone, or adds some random fact about the topic) and it is labelled as another “white thing”… then someone that isn’t white posts pretty much the same thing and they are left alone…
http://xkcd.com/385/
Though this is sexist and NOT racist, it still applies
[...] #1 Coffee [...]
Coffee is better at the local store. It is better grown at high altitudes. It is best when from Hawaii. Mahala!
25/w/m. This site must be a northern thing b/c none of these blogs make sense. I’m not a fan of any of these, except for me thinking asian’s are hot.
[...] the sense of humor that allows laughing at stereotypes, even when they’re poking fun at you. See #1 – Coffee for one reason this site cracks me [...]
White people like a lot of stuff.
I may be white on the outside, but I’m coffee on the inside …. does that count ..??!!!
We are here to make coffee metal. We will make everything metal. Blacker than the blackest black, times infinity
Funny Blog. I’m going to digg it
OMG, I LOVE THIS!
you do NOT want to see me before I get my morning coffee.
OMG, totally true. All white folks in my office gather around the coffee machine every morning proclaiming “Goodness i need this right now, otherwise i can’t lift a finger” Whatever happened to just getting enough sleep, lol.
I love coffee, but I’m not willing to call it anything but coffee.
Check it:
http;//bb4h.blogspot.com
The replys people leave are almost as funny as the actul blog…..lighten up people…its suppost to be funny!
I am sure guilty of this one… i heart coffe;)!!
i am shocked that number one isn’t bagels… i work at a coffee shop and every morning we stuff around 100 plus bagels into art students mouths… and if they are not eating bagels they are ordering croissants in french accents… this site rules….
just got back from ethiopia – on a coffee sourcing trip – and i discovered that ethiopians might even like coffee more than white folks…
What is FAIR TRADE coffee? I feel so inferior!
If you want to be really, really white, only drink coffee made in a Clover machine. It’s amazing and really maximizes those quality fair trade beans. Totally worth the extra $5 / cup… This machine, found at only the finest coffee shops makes the best beans in the world into the best coffee in the world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfWIkAUsinM
http://cloverequipment.com/home/Default.aspx
The person who said ordering coffee is more hip than drinking it is definitely true. See how they light up when they get to tell a friend to get their order, and how many points they rack up when the drink is IMPOSSIBLE to remember.
Then they get to go back and correct it =)
But don’t forget, since you’re on your multicultural kick, that having a multicultural coffee is even more important. If you can serve imported Ethiopian coffee at your dinner party, or organic Vietnamese, your way cooler than your Starbucks friends.
motorola razr should take the #1 spot.
oh yea, “pickup trucks” should be on the list too
Coffee is the number 1 export for the majority of South America, Africa, and Asia. So if it weren’t for white people minorities would be poor
NASCAR are you kidding me?? coffee is white but seriously?
I can’t argue with this. I am white and like coffee. The truth is out.
I love coffee and I’m a big white guy….I need it to sleep!!!!
I learned about coffee from my father who is a white republican!!!!!
very white….I grind my own beans every day…yeah!!!dudeeeeee
On Saturday and Sundays I walk my dog and Asian girlfriend past the Starbucks two blocks from my house, about a mile away to the more obscure but still a chain Pete’s. I do this first because they make a much stronger Soy Latte and their raspberry scone is the most delicious food in the history of earth, but also because Pete’s is a little more obscure and the walk is good for us. A nice place to go through the Sunday ads too.
You have to get the Nespresso Aeroccino frother. It makes the BEST foam ever, is completely silent, easy to clean, it looks very chic. It is a little pricey, but it is from Switzerland, so it is so worth it.
White people (urban palor) may like coffee, but pink people (we sunburned Scots) prefer tea; smokey lapsang souchong and bold Assam blended or separate are way cool. Mountains cannot be climbed on coffee; your may think o’ latte ‘n froth but up there ya’ do ya’ work on tea.
I just drink regular coffee. No stops at any coffee shops (only idiots pay that much for coffee) and I just call it coffee. This list is a big fail so far.
Coffee can kiss my ass.
Judging from the list, a more appropriate name for this site would be “Stuff urban White people like”.
How white is this?
You too can roast your own coffee at home by converting a West Bend Poppery II (Hot Air Popcorn Popper). Google “popcorn popper coffee roaster” for your own instructions!
I ask why? And where do you buy green coffee so you can roast your own anyway? And, it will never taste as good as the cup of joe at Dunkins.
http://www.twobarkingdogs.wordpress.com
WTF THE NUMBER 1 THING WE LIKE IS….COFFEE LOLLOLOL
I LOOOOOOVE coffee and I am half white- but I can’t drink it in the morning because it makes my stomach hurt
I also happen to LOVE Starbucks (tall redyeye)….its not b/c its expensive its just the best readily available coffee. Try going into a diner or bodega or even Dunkin Donuts….its like piss water.
Other than that this site is hilarious. I know so many white people like this. I think it should actually be called Stuff Liberal White People Like though…or Stuff Rich White Liberals Like.
Samuel Elliot Morrison, one of the greatest military historians, wrote that the first thing the Navy did in WWII was to secure shipping lanes from Central America to the US Gulf Coast and US East Coast.
He asked admirals, “Why this strategy?”, as opposed to securing the North Atlantic first.
The reply was, “… to secure coffee. It was not known if the Navy could win a war without coffee, it had never been tried.”
ORGANIC fair trade is even better.
Does drinking 2/3 decaf so I can drink 3 times as much make me white orjust brilliant?
To # 16 Rudi. Do you know what is decidedly not white? taking all the fun out of saying what things are and are not white. Thanks
. Now i have to go figure out if I’m doing enough white things. I do like coffee so I guess thats one.
What this list doesn’t have on it is white people love to order cool sounding alcoholic drinks. Come on, the martini is huge, and Kirkland should know since they are the number 1 city with DUI’s in Wa. St.
Racist – against whites
381 Andrea
Stupid-you.
this is the only place that i can feel ok laughing about race… brilliant
what about our war machines????? whites are the only ones enjoying smart bombs and stealth fighters!!!!!!!!!!!
and quantum physics… now that is about as white as it gets..
I’m sitting here having just found this site & enjoying the hell out of it. O & I’m also drinking a cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee I made myself from an $8 bag I bought & watching March Madness.
Love that coffee!!!!!!!
Won’t find any brothers in Starbucks paying that kind of money.
I have 4 cups a day, all from Trader Joes, whole bean. I try to deep the caf at one cup, sometimes 2 cups. This is my only drug. I also have 3 cups of green tea. 1or 2 are caf.
Wooowww….. I wish I could comment on the whole thing. On about 3/4 of this I have to say “guilty as charged.”
Pros: Great site; great list!
Cons: It should read what LIBERAL white people like.
I (non-liberal white guy) get bored and irritated with 90% of the stuff on this list, which is what Liberal/Progressive white people like.
My (white non-liberal) friends do, too.
I can’t tell you how quickly I change the subject when yet another liberal neighbor feels free to talk solemnly about diversity, the environment, gay people, alternative religions, etc.
We’re not all that dull and predictable; just the progressives.
Oh my God this site is friggin hilarious. The one on assists really cracked me up. Good work.
BTW, I’m white and LOVE coffee!!
Do what now?
Tripple Venti, 9 Pump Vanilla, Skiny & Wet… Kthx…
Whitey here. What a waste of energy. Your’e talking about tv show ‘Friends”, or ‘Seinfeld’. If you actually knew any ‘real’ white people you couldn’t stereotype them cause they’re all different, but to you they all look the same. Sad really..
Oh, you betcha. I’m as pasty-white as it comes, and I started drinking the bean when I was 12. Love that stuff. Nectar. The one thing that makes me want to get out of bed every day. Coffee. Thank you, tropics. A nice dark roast, a bit of half-and-half, and the problems of the world seem a little less terrible. I am so white.
Your Honor;I plead guilty on every count. (I do admit to drinking all my coffee, strong & black) I’ve got a cup in my hand every morning. I even took a coffee pot to Yellowstone National Park for emergency use. (A white thing) I’m one of those who get a killer headache if I don’t get my morning fix.
As a kid I grew up on the thick chiccory coffee’s in Baton Rouge. Misery loves company, so I got my wife hooked. She was already half way there. She liked the smell of coffee in the morning. I loved the smell of Napalm in the morning… (bad joke) That says I’m older than most of you.
As a card-carrying ‘white man’ I’m almost never caught without a cup of coffee in my hand. This was pointed out in the extreme at 4pm one day as I arrived at a middle school to stand-by for soccer practice as an EMT in an ambulance. I pulled up to the athletic director, (another white man) who saw that I had a fresh cup of coffee in my hand. He pointed out that he had never seen me arrive without a fresh cup of coffee and asked if that was part of being an EMT. I raised my cup in a ’salute’ and said ‘Sure is!’ Now, thanks to the information on this site, I know it’s also part of being a White Man!
This is sooooo true
What’s wrong with me? I don’t like Starbucks and never bought fair trade coffee. But I do love the mean cup of Cafe con leche my husband makes me in the morning.
I know Flyclothing.com would not run without coffee, but its only half white (1/2 black, 1/4 green, 1/4 red…see, cant even figure fractions without coffee). LOL.
there is a subspecies of white people who take pride in preferring low end coffee from places like Dunkin’ Donuts to Starbucks.
Yeah, us whiteys like the coffee, but I don’t think it’s a phenomenon associated with whiteness.
Black, white, red, yellow, somewhere in between, it doesn’t matter….we’re all still lining up at Tim Horton’s eager to Roll up the Rim.
One thing I do notice though, the coffee North American white people drink is considered repulsive by other cultures.
Starbucks, Fair Trade, and all those other coffees suck.
America runs on Dunkin’, baby.
“StuffWhitePeopleLike” should be renamed to “StuffYuppiesLike.”
did white people invent computers and internet?
good thing, if so or if not.
coffee with cream is post-racial.
the coffee freaks will understand…I prepare my espresso on my espresso machine – I even buy the pods at Starbucks – my guilty pleasure is sniffing the package the pod comes in to get that lovely coffee bouquet…ahhh…nothing like it.
Im white and i love coofee! Most ppl drink it for the caffeine, i drink it for the taste. the bitterness is yummmmmy. This site is so true- “parents making u feel bad about not going outside” truest thing ever
I’m not white, but I must say, coffee is awesome. I must say however, I HATE Starbucks. There coffee is awefully. Normally I prefer Blue Mountain, but it in the interest of time, I will fuel up at 7-11.
The whitest Dane, Per V. made a tribute to (black) coffee a couple of years ago.
It’s called Black Power and is on YouTube here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JzF51Oar5gc
It’s in Danish so it wont make much sense to most of you but it is a bit funny with lines like:
“Latte and au lait is not groovy – But I take the black one a move me”
“It has to be black – cream and sugar is sel out”
“I’m a white guy trapped in a white mans body, but i got a black soul so pour it up”
I love Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf!
On the rare occasion when I do go to $tarbucks, it’s fun to order “a large coffee”. The snooty people behind the counter always get this condescending look on their face and say something like, “we don’t just sell COFFEE and we don’t have small, medium or large”.
wow …. owsome ..
its realy owsome blog i lik
I’m indonesian.. i like coffee so much too, i cant do anything in the morning before i got a cup of coffee …
sometimes i hate to be like that, but sometimes i realy² enjoyed my self …. LOL
[referring to the full list]
oh my Lord! I have been ‘acting white’ and didn’t know it! This blog is a revealation! I have only been living among ‘white people’ for 6-odd years and I am already into.. #’s 1,6,8,9,13,19,26,34,35,36,40,44,48,60,63,81 and I am so keen on getting into..3,5,12,20,24,27,29,42,51,87,89. Oh God I hope my wife never finds this site!!!
(This blog wouldnt be funny if it weren’t true. And some peoples comments here sound like if Sean Hannity were to comment on the Daily Show jokes ….. nitpicking an insightful observation to death.)
Guilty. Love my coffee (three cups a day), excellent for health and robustness.
Helps you live longer too (something else white people dig !)
White people love to laugh at “white people jokes”.
They also love to…
Refer to ghettos as “blighted communities”
“urban areas”
“inner cities”
“the Barrio”
“underprivileged neighborhoods”
“subsidized housing”
“the projects”
“sub-standard housing”
‘the other side of the tracks”
‘the hood”
“ethnic minority enclaves”
“Places where white people used to live”
We used to drink, actualy eat, Turkish coffee because my boyfriend’s favorite film is Midnight Express then we had the Asadorian guy up and he read the grounds and said we should be drinking only mineral water. We bought the carpet anyway.
Coffee is coffee. I love it regardless of where it’s from.
I’m convinced white people drink coffee to maintain some connection to their black idols. Unless they take it with a lot of milk. Then they’re just fooling themselves.
Do you folks realize that when a white person posts something on this site that RIPS whites, they look like dumbasses for trying to be TOO politically correct- it kinda proves the point of this site! Also, bashing on whitey is as cliche as whitey being trendy.
What do you suggest white people do then??
Get all fired up about it instead??
What’s the matter with taking the piss out of yourself?
You don’t have to go through the ‘cigarette’ phase of drinking bitter coffee until you like it if you grew up during the Starbucks boom. Their lattes are so much like desert that you can bypass that phase & then when you are older and have grown accustomed to the ‘coffee’ part of the ‘latte’, you can switch to straight coffee easily.
I always liked regular coffee though. I started drinking it when I was 14 and drank so much I had to quit cold turkey when I was 20 because I felt too addicted to stand it. But now I’m back to a cup a day (at least not 3-4 like before)… but coffee is really tasty.
Anyhoo, if you have stomach problems as a result of coffee I’ve realized Folgers flavored coffees are a killer & Dunkin Donuts is pretty smooth on the stomach. Also, the bolder the coffee, the longer it’s been roasted, the less acid in the cup individually (so a barista told me, and I’m not sure how right she was but it seems to be true from experience)
I’m white, and you’ve made me realize that pretty much ALL the things that I’ve felt adequate about over the years (don’t snowboard or do yoga, don’t drink wine or coffee, don’t go to plays, don’t enjoy 80s nights (SO TRUE), don’t own a bike, don’t listen to public radio, etc.) are really just white things and I don’t fit the mold! Wow… I should have a talk with my dead mother. I mean, I must be black or brown or toffee or tan or green or blue or anything but WHITE.
Or did I hear this somewhere else?
One of the reason why white women have such high infertility and low libido rates is because they drink too much coffee. If you ever plan on having kids and good sex, stay the hell away from coffee.
HAHAHAH!!!! I LOVE this site!!!!!
)
im glad im white. i was going to make a stuffblackpeoplelike.com but then i realized it would only consist of two entries, which would be
1) anything that is not work and 2) anything that does not involve swimming.
Navin is obviously a white man….they blame anything and everything but their own lack of sexual prowess for their girls’ not having interest in sex. Love my coffee…drink it all day….love my man all night!
Another example of whiteness is the irksome refusal to use the personal pronoun “he or she.” For example, the author of the coffee article writes:
But I promise you that the first person at your school to drink coffee was a white person. You could kind of tell they didn’t enjoy it, but they did it anyways until they liked it – like cigarettes.
Notice how the author moves from a single individual in the first sentence (ie, the first person at my school), to a plural pronoun in the second (ie, “they”). The author refuses to fall into the sexist trap of saying “he”, even when the context demands a singular pronoun. This is classic example of whiteness in prose.
Some of you “coffee lovers” confuse me….you say you love your coffee and then you think “3 cups a day” makes you a true coffee lover. You act like 3 cups a day is a whole lot!!! Oh my goodness….I have 3 or 4 cups of coffee before I leave the house every day, 4 or 5 while working all day, then 1 or 2 more after I get home! Come on…let’s hear from the Real coffee drinkers! And I don’t mean the cappacino and latte sect….I’m talking about the real coffee drinkers! lol
Hmmm… one pot before I head out the door. A stop at Starbucks along the way. Then I get to work and see my note pad that says “My Blood Type Is Coffee.” God, white people are great. This is the best site ever. I love blogs
im white as i can be but alot of this does not describe me at all but i do like coffee
yea. i dont like coffee, nor do i need it in the morning
Coffee=Sweet Nectar of Life! I seriously don’t know how some people function without it.
easily. If it’s not water…fuck it!
As a white male of a very dominant race I must confess, I must pronounce…
YAHHH!!!
Dude, coffee-hater….chill.
thanks mom…I really needed that one word of wisdom.
Hi! really interesting page, as an Argentine i could tell you, that here, with a really small population of african-descendants, white people drinks a lot of coffee. But also drink Mate: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mate_%28beverage%29.
Regards!
Hmmm, my wife and I might only be marginally white. We hate Starbucks (and their big corporate ilk), but don’t frequent the corner coffee shops much either. We’re not into the foo-foo grande-extra-mocho-frappochinos, but we do order 100% free-trade organic swiss-water-process decaf, from a progressive alternate coffee supplier, state-side.
And we eschew crass American lingo like “cup o’ joe”… we call our morning brew a “cup of Juan M’beki Castro”.
Posting anything on a forum is probably the whitest thing one can do.
I’m am British so I generally drink tea and not coffee….it does have to be white though (with milk).
Does this count?
Not only do I love coffee, and especially fair trade coffee, but I have a complusive white need to buy the green beans now and roast them myself at home. In addition, I frequently use my iPhone to check out the origination and flavor qualities of my favorite coffee beans!!!!!
Coffeewoman:
I’m with you on drinking lots of coffee.
I start the day with a pot. I have a couple of cups when I get to work. I finish the day with another pot. I feel ‘wired-up’ in the morning, but I can go to sleep at night while drinking a cup.
(I drink coffee like a wino drinks wine. I Live to drink and drink to live.
It’s also pretty good in chili’s & stews. I make a mean BBQ sause with coffee to cut KC’s and a bunch of spices.
I love Maxwell House Special Blend. (A very white thing)
Hello readers!
I’d like to make one small correction to the above statement…
No, you do not pay $2 extra and that makes a difference. Fair trade coffee is often equally/competetively priced to your usual Starbucks variety. As a matter of fact, don’t take my word for it. Next time you visit Starbucks, ask for the Cafe Estima blend (fair trade) and see if the price makes a difference to you. Its the allocation of monies paid along the supply chain long before you purchase it from your local coffee shop that makes the difference.
Fair Trade means:
* Fair Price
* Fair Labor Conditions
* Direct Trade
* Democratic & Transparent Organizations
* Community Development
* Environmental Sustainability
And… yes, Fair Trade does make a difference. It’s not the cure all for poverty and it never claimed to be but it is an effort. If any of you have a better idea, please step forward!
“To give a man a fish” = chairty.
“To teach a man to fish” = fair trade.
I think Americans in general like Coffee… I don’t think this is a “white people” thing.
For once, I actually agree with this silly blog. Coffee has indeed been elevated to a freakin’ cult drink, and indeed, only dumb white people would pay what they do at Starbucks. I, for once, wouldn’t care if all coffee disappeared from the Earth overnight.
All coffee’s disappearing from Earth would precipitate WW III out of sheer crankiness. Sex makes the world go ’round, but what do we WASPy types drink after porking (Miles’ word) all night? Drink good coffee in the AM. We like that organic Sumatra from Borders for junk. OMG, Starbucks is like so ’80’s and not happening although next time I’m coerced into going there (at gunpoint), I intend to ask for a “large coffee” and enjoy the contempt behind the counter.
[...] #1 Coffee [...]
I love this site. I have laughed out loud several times. I kept waiting for “scrapbooking” to appear in this list…
Thanks to the folks at “The Week” for steering me to this site.
“Coffee” is not a good choice for this site. Maybe “Lattes” is better?
Coffee good! Strong like OXE!
[...] beans and then laborioulsy roasted them in small batches….phwew! Wow….that is so….WHITE! I’m even enough of a snob that I don’t get what I consider rediculous drinks that cover [...]
Fair and balanced? Make it interesting; what do black, brown, red, and yellow people like?
But that wouldn’t be P.C. would it?
LOL!
This blog is very creative. I will recommend it to my class when I teach whiteness.
[...] had a point - I mean, for crying out loud, look at this list. #1, Coffee. #24, Wine, #23, Microbreweries. Apple Products? Arrested Development? The Idea of [...]
[...] (so are many of our friends who are non-white in the classic sense). For instance, today I had coffee while reading my morning chapter of a David Sedaris book, went to Berkeley Bowl, bought organic [...]
[...] truth is, like most people described on that site, I like hating corporations, coffee, knowing what’s best for poor people, and Mos Def. I also have enjoyed the first three [...]
i hear you live in riverdale, come to my work: second cup on the danforth, i will be the asian!!
Please visit jesus-is-lord website.
Thank you.
So who died and left a Mexican in charge?
Coffee is my only proof that there is a God…
My parents started me on coffee when I was two by giving me “shots” in empty creamer cups at diners
Dunkin Donuts FTW!!
[...] inseli, drugule, nu chestiile astea sunt cheia vietii, ci java, Joe, rocket fuel. Cafeaua este cel mai important lucru pentru un alb. Vrei sa fii o cioara? Nu? BEA CAFEA! Uite inca un desen, in caz ca ai uitat cum iti [...]
[...] right at home. According to them, white people like a lot of very unpredictable things, such as coffee, religions that their parents don’t belong to, bottles of water, outdoor performance clothes, [...]
Let’s no forget the others!
black people prefer driving the Nissan Altima and they like to back into parking places.
Latinos have their own “ethnic” food huts on the side of the road and have stores that only other Latinos shop at.
Asians like to shop at Hollister and always major in business or science.
I think the point here is that while simply drinking coffee is not necessarily a White attribute in and of itself, referring to a medium coffee as a ‘grande’ surely is (assuming you don’t speak Italian and probably even then). The only thing more White than that is referring to the teenager behind the counter with the dirty apron as a ‘barrista’.
I liked this article (as a joke) until I read all the comments. Way to ruin it! Racial tentions run from people who draw meaning where there was none intended. So what if white people love coffee?
“White people” are so often denied a culture card because of the stereotypes connected with the term. My parents drank a ton of coffee when I grew up, and guess what? I do too now, and that would be the same no matter what color my skin was. The fact that norms are passed down through culture doesn’t mean you can draw conclusions about a group of people.
Side note: The whole paying more to be “green” is a corporate push brought on by the pressure from government and other countries that care more than we do about protecting resources. How that got assigned to white people is a puzzle to me.
Anyone who calls coffee “joe” should be punched in the face.
Wow you knew a white person in high school? Did they bring a thermous(which you would not be able to see what they were drinking) or did they buy it right out of the teachers cafateria?, liar.
Also adding “vanilla” as a flavouring to any kind of coffee or tea variety is extremely white. However, “hazelnut” is becomming more popular as it eludes mildly to European culture especially. Combining “hazelnut” and “vanilla” shows that you are particularly refined and have a complex “palate”.
Also renaming every white person’s favourite colour “chocolate brown” to “coffee”, or calling beige “mocha” and dark brown “espresso” is very trendy in the home decor field. I was the only jew working in a fabirc store run by an old jewish man and we’d always make jokes about the WASPs that would come in. I would deal with these “white” “interior” designers who ironically would come in with a Venti Non Fat Chai Mocha Vanilla Soy Half Caf Dry Latte from Starbucks and tell me that they want to upholster their clients’ “ottoman” or “Setee” in “espresso ultrasuede”. Perhaps they need “Cappucinno coloured” silk for a “roman blind” in the “breakfast nook” or “mud room”.
We’d play along with their game, I’d reduce the price slightly to make them think they are getting a deal and then he’d sell them 3 extra yards they don’t need…take my lunch break and we’d joke about “shiksas” and “the goyim” behind their backs and how much their 12 year old daughters are jealous that they can’t have a Bat Mitzvah party. Oh yeah and we also had a tag team way of makingthem purchase “flawed” fabric…”because a pearl is a flaw after all” and “even Marilyn Monroe had a birthmark”…trust me they love being entertained by Jews they just eat it up like it’s a free comedy show.
At least we can make fun of ourselves and make money at doing it too!
By the way there are no Starbucks in Israel. They werethere for 2 years and went out of business.
OK, I’ll grant you that white americans love coffee in gigantic quantities…
but being Colombian,
and having been raised drinking cafe con leche out of my baby bottle (seriously)
I’ll bet you i was the first one who drank coffee in my lily white high school.
But the funny thing is to come back from Colombia, where people drink coffee out of what you might consider dentist office mouthwash cups (the little thimble-sized ones), and encounter a Starbucks venti in the Houston airport!
Java Man obviously ‘discovered’ coffee.
Java Man is the name given to fossils discovered in 1891 at Trinil on the banks of the Bengawan Solo River in Indonesia, one of the first known specimens of Homo erectus. Its discoverer, Eugène Dubois, gave it the scientific name Pithecanthropus erectus, a name derived from Greek and Latin roots meaning upright ape-man.
So, coffe was ‘discovered’ by ape-men in Indonesia.
ASAIN POWER!!