#11 Asian Girls
January 20, 2008 by mylosh
Please note that this is one area where white women are exempt from, but they should be exempt from other things such as voting and participation in Division 1 sports.
95% of white males have at one point in their lives, experienced yellow fever. Many factors have contributed to this phenomenon such as guilt from head taxes, internment camps, dropping the Nuclear bomb and the Viet Nam War . This exchange works both ways as asian girls have a tendency to go for white guys. (White girls never go for asian guys. Bruce Lee and Paul Kariya’s dad are the only recorded instances in modern history). Asian girls often to do this to get back at their strict traditional fathers. There is also the option of dating black guys, but they know deep down that this would give their non-english speaking grandmother(s) a heart attack.
White men love asian women so much that they will go to extremes such as stating that Sandra Oh is sexy, teaching English in Asia, playing in a coed volleyball league, or attending institutions such as UBC or UCLA (please note that both schools’ colors of “blue” and “yellow” are intentional also the “A” in “UCLA” stand for “Asian” while the “B” in “UBC” stands for “Billion” try and figure out what the rest of the letters stand for). Another factor that draws white guys to asian women is that white women are jealous of them.
Take for instance the fact that asian women well into their 30s and 40s retain teen / college girl looks without the help of botox, yoga or a trendy diet (future posts). Asian women also avoid key white women characteristics such as having a mid life crisis, divorce, and hobbies that don’t involve taking care of the children (also future posts). Should white guy / asian girl marry, they produce hybrids that are atheistically pleasing, but are very annoying. This practice is also a means by which white people can catch up to the asian peoples in the population race, as most of the hybrids often act white rather than asian.
references: Bananas, Toyota Prius, Michelle Branch, California Roll, Johnny Damon, Kristen Kreuk, 40% of Vancouver’s population
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(One more quick comment to set the record straight:)
For the first time in a U.S. movie the Asian male protagonist who is not a Kung Fu master got the girl! (I mean, REALLY got the girl…) And the girl is none other than THE Deborah Gibson! See Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus. Or since the movie is really bad even when watched drunk, you can just take my word for it.
Ha great blog because its all true.
It ok for white guys to take the ugly/poor personality asian girls. but please do leave the good ones for us asian males. we have so little to choose from.
interestingly above average asian girls in melbourne act like they are the queen of sheba. it must be to do with supply demand balance.
i think the best asian girls are koreans! who agrees? they have spunky personalities, good looks, not too short and kind hearts. what more could you want.
Agreed. Koreans rule. I base this solely on my experiences with one half Korean girl and several fantasy about others.
i believe it’s the chinese, but then again i dont know much about melbourne, except it’s worse than sydney
koreans look too similar, too segregated, and i dont see as many top ones i saw in china or those in australia. arent the chinese women tallest in asia though?
oh and the japanese. basically chinese and japanese people ftw!
Dear Sir, I would like to thank you for putting us #11 out of the many things that white people like. I feel truly honored. (Do NOT imagine me saying that in an accent a la Master Splinter…)
On the other hand, I have to be honest, I am rather peeved that we are not on the Top 10 List. (Wes Anderson?! Ok. Fine. I can live with that. I like him too) I am not sure whether you have had a chance to read through all 14500+ comments generated by this post. (Great job! Congrats!) Granted most of them are hate mails from all groups of males: Maybe for once they can all agree to hate Asian females and hate each other? I thought I’d leave a post to thank your readers for the new insights about ourselves that I didn’t know before.
Here are a few things I’ve learned from your ab. fab. and maddeningly funny post:
1. If you are white and male and you are looking to date a girl of Asian descent (hey, let’s be PC here, peeps!) show her to your other Asian, preferably male, friends. (If you have no other friends of Asian descent, hmmm, I think there should be another post about this situation but I digress…) As a last resort, take her to any Asian restaurant (No, Panda Express does NOT count!) Ask them whether she is HOT by their standards. Do not trust your own judgement.
2. If you are a girl of Asian descent and are fielding interest from a non-Asian male, do ask him whether he’s ever been to Asia and more importantly, whether he’s taught English there. If YES to the latter or if he has stayed there for longer than a month, RUN.
3. If he says, “I love Panda Express.” Punch him in the nose and then RUN.
4. If you think you may be suffering from Yellow Fever or Asian Fetish, you really should get it looked at. Your insurance may cover it.
How much do you want to bet that submom is a bitter white guy pretending to be a woman?
$1 Million Dollars?! (Cue Dr. Evil…)
I am an asian male, and this message is for White men – stop stealing all our women!
They are our women! Keep your white women!
we don’t want our white women! they’re nasty personality-wise, often nasty look-wise, and a bunch of them have those annoying british/australian/white south african/some other countries accents. eoh, helleo, woay deo yeou haeyte moiy accent (as they taught you in kindergarten, sound it out).?
No way, they can have all the Asian women they want. More white women for us!
LOL
Asian Women in demand!!!!
Better bind their feet now, because they’re running towards us.
I am an asian filipino and I hate how white men are taking all our women!
There are more white men in the world than Filipino men, so you should be worried.
I’m in the unique position of being an undergrad from singapore at a melbourne uni and almost all my girl friends are chinese. So many of them have ended up with white guys who”re in their late thirties and who’re so obviously cheating on them or using them to fulfill their asian fetish. one guy even asked my friend to talk dirty to him in mandarin! have you ever heard how mandarin sounds like? it’s impossible to sound sexy in that language.
However, I’ve also seen a lot of white dudes with BUTT ugly asian chicks and i do mean BUTTTT ugly. so obviously, the asian fetish has driven them to hook up with the chick who looks like smallpox personified. if i were them i’d go after white chicks instead of settling for the thing from the bottom of the lake, just because she’s aasian.
joe are u asian
wouldnt u feel that taking ugly ones of ur race would actually benefit u as an asian more?
lol just a thought
mmm well mandarin sounds kind of romantic and soft and kevin rudd speaks it
cantonese doesnt sound sexy though
No languages is completely sexy, f*ckturds.
Our society has put white women at the top of the beauty totem pole. And for good reason, white women are gorgeous.
I couldn’t agree more.
Me, I’m not into Asian chicks. Black chicks. That’s who I’m into. Black chicks have the nicest bodies. #1 choice.
Followed by blondes, #2, redheads #3.
There’s just something about Black chicks and blonde chicks being similar. Tall, leggy, and I’ve met some Black chicks who knew they were pretty and had that same attitude that some people characterize as “blond bimbo.” In fact, I’ve met some Black chicks who do “blond bimbo” better than blondes do, but in parody.
I’ve got a name for them even: eboniet (ebon-yay) Black chicks who are tall and leggy and like to hang around with white guys, who like to drink cocktails, martinis, margaritas. Enoniets are not the same as “oreo’s” that is, they’re not necessarily imitating whites, neither are they ghetto. The ones I’m talking about come from poor neighborhoods, generally, but like to live a rich lifestyle.
It’s funny to mention, but I also would rather be with an American Black lady who dresses Asian, wears a Kimono, or tries to look Geisha, than with an actual Japanese Geisha.
For every “eboniet”,there are at least 1000 Ghetto-bitch Roshonda’s,LaQuisha’s etc. You and your eboniets-what a dork u are! but bon chance my firend,I hope you avoid the herpes,syphillis,clap etc!
Black women are some of the least likely people to marry in the US., so theoretically your field is wide open. View the youtube videos. They will only condescend to marry a white guy if there is no one left on earth. They would probably agree with Sotomayor. I think even if you go into some of the lowest income neighborhood that you’ve got a lot to prove and to convince them. Good luck.
I can only speak for myself, but I definitely don’t evaluate women just on outward contours and features alone. I mean even if she might look kind of attractive, who wants to get involved if she’s always manipulative or literally kicks your head like a soccer ball while you’re asleep?!? If you find the right Asian woman, then she’ll fully support you. In the US almost all the WM/WF divorced couples I’ve known were when the WF just decided she wanted to exit the relationship and initiated the divorce, even though the guy didn’t have another girlfriend. BF have an even higher rate of divorce in the US.
You’re not alone. Most guys I know, myself included, don’t care for the looks or attitudes of Asian chicks. I think they were a trend for a couple of years because they were the new immigrants on the block, but now that everyone knows what they’re generally like, the guys don’t want the Asian girls. They’re too snobby and they have no real reason to be. I have yet to meet one who is intelligent, interesting, good-looking, humble and nice at the same time. Yet, I run into non-Asian girls left and right with those qualities all the time. So why would I want some Asian girl when I can get a white woman or another type of woman who is ten levels above her? It’s a no-brainer.
those Asian chicks probably already knew that you and your loser herd you call friends that you were all losers, enjoy your trailer trash white dogs
Black females are ugly. You need to look up close to their faces.
I understand HTA, no female, especially BLACK females will ever measure up to your blow-up doll you have under your bed. And when your doll is sleeping, you run to the comforting hooves of your pet sheep to keep you warm at night. You are quite the casinova.
put alil love in your heart
I love asian girls – they are extremely sexy – smooth beautiful tan skin, and gorgeous eyes. I also find Asian women to be quite bright & I also love elements of their culture & art. I am happily married to a girl from the Philippines (south east Asia) and we have a beautiful 11 month old baby girl. She is adorable and I know I’ll have to invest in a shotgun when she’s old enough to date… she’ll break a lot of boy’s hearts for sure.
If we ever have a son, I’ll send him to Asia to hopefully find his soulmate if he inherits yellow fever like his dad. But I’ll be happy no matter who my kids love, as long as they’re taken care of and treated right.
You have to control yourself. You would probably rape your own daughter. I know white men ahve that tendency. sick twisted freaks.
aaah, that’s sweet. congrats on your newish baby.
How much do you want to bet that daddy-o is a bitter white guy pretending to be a woman?
I love Asian chicks and their wet pink pussies. I just want to eat it up. I think Asian chicks are the best at sex. They’re so hot
If you had even the tiniest inkling of knowledge about the human body, you would know that all vaginas are pink and
“wet” on the inside.
Take your virgin ass out of here.
You probably think they’re the best at sex because they make you feel like you have a big D!ck when in actuality…
Jealousy. Not all pussy is pink, retard. Go watch porn. And Juanita, you probably are some jealous white girl pretending to be a Hispanic woman. Please stfu.
WOW. Um, what an offensive post, albeit a funny one? Nerdy white guys are the bane! Give me a normal human being of whatever color they happened to be born, any day! I for one as a 100% Asian girl would NEVER even be interested in someone who was so one-dimensional as to fall into the stereotype of a nerdy, mediocre white dude who feels the need to date Asian girls for God knows WHAT reason!
And also, half-white/half-Asian people who think they are somehow ‘better’ than full Asian people are ridiculous. That is being racist, and I don’t know why you would think that you can still regard ethnic Asians as inferior while touting yourself as a liberal, post-racial person.
You people need to GET a life and a clue!
Ha!!! I’m a half breed and live in the city of Chicago. So, I see a lot of other mixed (white/asian) girls all the time and know a few. Personally, I find the adopted ones are the ones who act like they are better than the average person and easily forget where they came from because they only know what their adopted (white) parents taught them. The half white asians are the worst and that only comes from personal experience. Not all are this way… at least the multi cultural ones that grew up around other races other than Caucasian.
I don’t find this article racist by any means (coming from a half breed who happens to be half black and korean…. trust! I know racism when I see it!!!) I find this article pretty accurate and should open the eyes of many people. I also know of plenty of white men that have gone to Korea for ‘vacation’ and got laid more often than not by korean girls… Korean girls get the fever as well. Sadly it only makes white men get big heads and make themselves think they’re Mr. Big Co^k when they get an asian girl…. I think this article is hilariously accurate!
So who/what do you date? Do you live in the ‘To? (Da GHETto!) There must be a lot of negro guys macking on you! “Maaan dat Juanita she be 1/2 Asian ‘n shit,das some fiiiine pussy!” :0 Black males see black women as too mean and too tough!
Yeah half-white Asians are really something, I think it’s odd how they would secretly be so contemptuous of full Asians when one of their parents is exactly that — FULL ASIAN!
Race issues are the bane. People need to just chill the fuck out. I am so glad I don’t live in California because it seems like a poisonous pot of all sorts of Asians, mixed Asians, and everything in between who all vie for a chance to look down on people who aren’t as assimiliated or as “white” as they are.
It makes me sick that they could treat each other that way. Most of those kinds of Asians kiss white peoples’ asses and turn around and spit on their own race. It’s really sad in a way because self-hating people never lead fulfilling lives.
Again, I’m glad I’m far away from such a racially conscious place as Cali. White guys and Asian girls are a sketchy combo in my opinion. The large amounts of sick people who engage in that kind of a relationship ruin it for the people who actually do it out of love.
And that’s the damned truth!
Hello I live in Cali. I am Asian, and I don’t hate Asian at all. It is their personal choice if they want to look up to White people, act White, or date White people.The reason why Asian women like White men can be can be bad, okay, good, or some of each.It really depends on their true intentions I would not say that all Asian women that goes out with White men are all evil or nice or whatever.
I don’t think White guys like all Asian girls. I think they tend to go for certain types .I know because I rarely get hit on by White guys….:).I am happy that white guys leave me alone.
Anways I am not short, not fat, tanned, and have wavy hair. People know that I am Asian, but they don’t know from what country I am from.I am Thai/Cambodian /Chinese/ Laos. African American females, young and old had told me that I am pretty.
aRRRRGH…Asian girls as a catigory are over rated…… get a hot waffle in your mouth today, shut the fug up and let ppl love eachother puhuhaha …idiots
Jealousy is never a good thing.
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