#39 Netflix
January 29, 2008 by clander
We all know white people love film festivals, but what about movies that don’t make it to a film festival, or weren’t in the local film festival? How do you get accesss? Thankfully white people have Netflix.
If you don’t know, Netflix sends you DVDs in the mail and you get new ones when you send the old ones back.
White people are absolutely crazy for Netflix for a number of reasons. Firstly, because all of them are convinced that there is a global conspiracy to keep good, independent, groundbreaking film from mainstream distribution (multiplexes, blockbuster, etc).
To them, Netflix (in spite of being a for profit company) is a brand new way for independent filmmakers to find an audience. By subscribing, white people believe that they are changing the film industry, supporting innovation, and contributing to a cultural revolution in film.
If you see a group of white people and you need to break into the conversation, a good thing to say “hey, is anyone else thinking that Netflix shipping is getting slower? I’m doing this PT Anderson thing, and I’m only up to Magnolia! What’s that all about?” They will relate, and talk about their own Netflix queues and how they are trying to get caught up on French New Wave.
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Netflix is for turds.
Go rent movies at your locally owned video store!
I would absolutely LOVE to rent movies at my locally owned video store!
Oh, Wait, less expensive, no late-fee systems like netflix game fly and Red Box drove BOTH of my locally owned video stores out of business.
I guess I’ll drive 45 minutes to my corporately owned Blockbuster which doesn’t have one single film I would ever numb my mind watching. My bad!
Bout to go watch avatar on netflix right now…
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE who seem to WASTE their money by ordering Netflix.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
I think a better entry would have been “Independent Video Stores.” White people like those a lot more than this “corporate venture.”
This is another weak one. I don’t know anyone who likes movies that doesnt love netflix, white or not.
http://www.beabetterproducer.com
Yeah, I agree. This isn’t a particularly white thing.
I feel whiter everytime I come in here eh pass the sea salt and the organic popcorn
I saw Netflix on this list and was like =0
I love it! Its such a great service…so many documentaries and older flicks and foreign movies you can’t find in the local video store(e.g. Blockbuster)
I currently have over 100 titles on my queue that I will probably never finish watching…and I keep adding and adding so its definitley going to take at least a couple of years to finish it all up.
How do I get you to stop sending SPAM to my computer? That’s what I think your ads are.
I don’t use your services, I don’t want to use your services. and I don’t want to receive your ads constantly.
I believe they border on harrasment. STOP SENDING ME THIS CRAP. Am I making myself clear? I will also investigate to see if there is any legal recource to get my e-mail address removed from your files.
June 09, 2009
Dear Mr. Elchynski:
The purpose of this is to convey to you my sincere apologies for any inconvenience you may have experienced last month with respect to the undesired e-mail delivery of WetWhiteAndWrinkled.com newsletters.
I just returned from vacation this week and found your file in my in-basket. As soon as I reviewed your case it was clear that somehow your May 20th request for a change in service had somehow slipped through a crack. The only possible explanation I can give is that we have recently had a number of key staff changes which might have resulted in your letter being overlooked.
Consequently, I have directed our Agitated Senior Solutions Group to contact you by the end of this week to set up a time convenient to you when they could go to your house and install your new router and make the necessary adjustments to your software.
Because of this serious oversight, and as a testament to our appreciation of you as our customer, we are going to provide you with your first three months of subscription to WetWhiteAndWrinkled.com free of charge. Therefore, your Visa card on file will not be billed until October of this year.
Mr. Elchynski, I can only hope that you will not come away without the impression that actions which failed to happen in your case are hardly atypical of WetWhiteAndWrinkled.com’s level of customer service. We continue to be committed to providing you and all of our customers with the highest standards of service in the industry.
If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to call me at 754-9785. Alternatively, feel free to simply bang on the ceiling with a broomstick and I’ll be right down, you cranky old man.
Yours in service,
Paul Cordero
Manager, Customer Solutions
WTF
I love Netflix. I chose to subscribe to it rather than waste money on Cable TV.
I have reconnected with many mini-series made when I was younger, but was too young to understand. Roots is a big example of this.
I missed out on Battlestar Galactica because I didn’t have Sci-Fi Network, but I have been enjoying the seasons on DVD.
I love seeing documentaries and other items that aren’t in theaters and aren’t on the shelves of the video rental store.
I won’t knock Netflix. It’s one of my favorite things out there.
I think my soulmate is a reader of this website, if not one of the contributors. I’m a Netflix subscribing, scarf-wearing, expensive sandwich eater.. someone here would LOVE me for sure.
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