#39 Netflix
January 29, 2008 by clander
We all know white people love film festivals, but what about movies that don’t make it to a film festival, or weren’t in the local film festival? How do you get accesss? Thankfully white people have Netflix.
If you don’t know, Netflix sends you DVDs in the mail and you get new ones when you send the old ones back.
White people are absolutely crazy for Netflix for a number of reasons. Firstly, because all of them are convinced that there is a global conspiracy to keep good, independent, groundbreaking film from mainstream distribution (multiplexes, blockbuster, etc).
To them, Netflix (in spite of being a for profit company) is a brand new way for independent filmmakers to find an audience. By subscribing, white people believe that they are changing the film industry, supporting innovation, and contributing to a cultural revolution in film.
If you see a group of white people and you need to break into the conversation, a good thing to say “hey, is anyone else thinking that Netflix shipping is getting slower? I’m doing this PT Anderson thing, and I’m only up to Magnolia! What’s that all about?” They will relate, and talk about their own Netflix queues and how they are trying to get caught up on French New Wave.
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White people may love Netflix but NetFlix may no return the love. One cannot watch movies online with Mac…. The white person may not always employ this option, but the denial of Mac friendly offerings by Netflix is a rather low blow.
white people like netflicks cause we are able to see black movies and not have to worry about not laughing loud enough in the theatre or getting shot.
also it is a well documented fact that the more rascist a white male is the more he really loves black chick flicks.
before the days of netflix various klansmen would have to go into urban neighborhoods to rent a copy of how stella got her groove back and have to risk the embarassment and explaination of seeing their other klansmen ahead of them online renting the same movie
This could’ve been a much better post. All that stuff about people having netflix to support independent cinema…I’ve never felt that sentiment. People get it for practical reasons. The last paragraph of this is spot on though (particularly the french new wave bit). You shoulda talked more about how netflix turns people into film snobs, and how once they’ve had it for two weeks they feel like they’re authorities on film.
It is because Netflix has movies that not every other damn chain has, such as independent and french new wave, silly Carl. And PLEASE PLEASE do not say “spot on” anymore, ever again, EVER. You have got to be white to say that! P.s. please disregard if you are actually FROM Britain (born & raised). Thank you.
We got Netflix to save money and watch from the comfort of our own home. But our furniture isn’t very comfortable, so we just spent $3,400 on a leather couch with 2 reclining seats.
Netflix is fine for generic whites;WASPs with a real education in film use Facets.
I couldn’t live without Netflix. Pretty much the greatest invention ever, well, in the last decade or so. There’s no other way I could keep up with (or afford) the 400 or so movies I watch a year.
Yes! Damn straight Ross! It is the best thing since sliced anything! It is the cheapest way to see ALOT of movies. The late fees at Blockbuster were killing me!
Of course, it could be that us white folks realize that spending four bucks on a movie at Hollywood of Blockbuster is an idiot’s way of renting movies. Last thing I want to do on a Friday night is stand in lines fifteen-deep for one over-worked and under-paid dropout to rent me a video that’s probably damaged while listening to the non-whites bray about how “down” Tyler Perry is and desperately trying to convince themselves that Denzel isn’t a washout.
Black folks rent a lot of shit.
I happen to work at Blockbuster, and every single one of the employees there (including myself) use Blockbuster as a second part-time job. Also, all of us (with one exception) not only graduated HS, but actually have college degrees. I am well paid at my day job and use my time at BB to stay busy and interact with great customers. For the record, there is about only 1 in 20 customers that are black. So, I suppose it’s not that you white folks realize that spending four bucks on a movie is an idiot’s way of renting movies. Our customers come in for instant gratification, as well as the opportunity to actually interact with people in the human race, as opposed to electronic devices.
[...] Saw a GREAT documentary last night called “Craft in America” that made me want to create teapots. (Got the documentary from Netflix, like we do.) [...]
I am so white. I love Netflix and I’m not even a movie buff. You can get all the old TV shows too.
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