#40 Apple Products
January 30, 2008 by clander
It is surprising that it took all the way to #40 to call out Apple products. Initially, we were planning for an entire week on Apple products, but that would just be over kill.
Plain and simple, white people don’t just like Apple, they love and need Apple to operate.
On the surface, you would ask yourself, how is that white people love a multi-billion dollar company with manufacturing plants in China, mass production, and that contributes to global pollution through the manufacture of consumer electronic devices?
Simple answer: Apple products tell the world you are creative and unique. They are an exclusive product line only used by every white college student, designer, writer, English teacher, and hipster on the planet.
You see, a long time ago Apple’s were super popular among layout artists and graphic designers. Then Apple released Final Cut Pro and became the standard for film editors. As a result, lots of creative industries used Apple computers instead of PCs. Eventually, people started making the connection, and all of a sudden all white people need to have a Mac.
When you ask white people about Mac’s they will say “oh, it’s so much better than Windows,” “it’s just easier to use,” “they are so cutting edge,” and so forth. What’s amazing is that white people NEED to meet people who use Windows to justify themselves spending an extra $500 for a pretty looking machine.
It is also important that white people are reminded of their creativity, and remember you need a Mac to creatively check email, creatively check websites, and creatively watch DVDs on planes.
White people also need iPods, iPhones, Apple TV, AirPort Express stations, and anything else that Apple will produce. Because you need to express your uniqueness by purchasing everything that a publicly traded company produces.
Apple products also come with stickers. Some people put them on their computer, some people put them on windows, but to take it to the pinnacle of whiteness, you need to put the Apple sticker in the rear window of your Prius, Jetta, BMW, Subaru 4WD Station Wagon or Audi. You then need to drive to a local coffee shop (Starbucks will do in a pinch) and set up your apple for the world to see. Thankfully, the Apple logo on the back will light up! So even in a dark place, people can see how unique and creative you (and the five other people doing the exact same thing) truly are!
Knowledge of Apple products can be useful in a number of social situations. If you see a white person with a Mac, an easy way to approach them is to say “Is that a Powerbook? What OS do you have?” They will happily start talking to you, after the requisite five minutes, you can invite them to an 80s night.
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Check out Asus Transformer Prime. You will forget about your under powered Ipad that does not allow you to view flash or to add storage. Not to mention you are forced to try to use the cloud. The cloud, the same place a consumer put a book up to, but because after her bought the book the price went up and the took the book back till he paid the difference. Apple is starting to get hit hard by viruses and Trojans. Soon, in the next 2 years they will be the next Microsoft. Look at the Macbook air when it first came out.. all the issues, Apple denied it. Look at the Macbook Pro with the Nvidia issue apple denied it(dont blame nvidia, Apple has great engineering is suppose to have excellent QA) Look at the iphone 4 when it came out.. Steve said you are holding it wrong, Look at the ipad, even the IPAD2, steve said if you dont like the wireless get closer to the router.
Apple is using cheaper parts on their computers and still charging higher prices. For example, Hands down. Atheros is the best wireless adapter, Apple stopped using them and went to Broadcom, whom by themselves were responsible PARLY for the iphone 4 issues, Ipad issues and the new macbook wireless issues. They took out the DVD multi drive out of the mac mini and yet still charge a higher price then the previous model. They do this as to force to you use the App store. You are all fools if you keep using it, soon they will have control of all your date and if they lose it. OOOPS! Thats all you will get. I want tangible software, I want to control my own data(You can read issues of what happened to consumers data in the cloud that was lost) I want to feel I paid for something. Any one that buys a Apple is just doing it because everyone else is, I have asked several people why they bought the ipad, when I showed them my Asus Transformer prime, the games and all I could do with it, not to mention add storage and and the 17 hours of battery life, they all said they wish they would have waited(Yes I took it to a Apple store, most of them left to get it).
So any one that buys Apple is nothing more the a Lemming.
Very well said.. but you are dealing with Apple people, where steve Jobs has the Jedi mind control over them.
Just build a Hackintosh and do all you want for cheaper, faster and better. Apple is starting to get hit with a bunch of Viruses and Trojans. People like Apple because they do not have a mind of their own and want to be told what to like. They are a bunch of followers. For example…..the Macbook air issues with they first came out….Apple lied about them and then finally came out about the truth. The iphone 4 issues. Steve said “You are holding it wrong.” The crappy wireless on the Ipad, “steve said get closer to the router.” end of story…
[...] مجموعهی چیزهایی که سفیدها دوست دارند قسمت مربوط به محصولات اپل را از دست ندهید. دوستداشتن:دوست داشتننخستین کسی [...]
[...] because they’re awesome. I can acknowledge that part of my appreciation for them is based on hype and the status they convey, but I also find them the easiest to use. They do the things I want to do in a way that’s [...]
@Shawn
If you thought this article was serious, you might a) have not read the rest of the site. b) take life itself a little too seriously.
You own products. Products are not lifestyles, and hopefully you don’t base too much of your self-worth on the products you own.
So right on. Apple is a sick cult and over blown marketing machine. Through the 90′s they claimed their processors were superior to Intel’s but never out clocked them in independent test. Now of course, Intel Inside. Their products are made by the same cheap labor force in China with just a $500++++ surcharge be cause they’re “cool” products and easy to use. Easy to use, says a lot of the technical prowess of their customer base.
So, how’d that 5 work out for you on your last review at MS?
Well, where to start – this is kind of funny in a tongue and cheek way but if you’re serious about all of this stuff then you’re either crazy or just uninformed.
Do you own any Apple products? I have owned an iPhone since day 1 and shortly thereafter my wife, son and finally daughter all loved it so much they have their own – a 3, a 3g and 2 4′s… I worked as an IT Manager at Microsoft and owned all iteration of ‘windows mobile’ phones before switching. I was in line on day 2 after using one that a co-worker picked up. I was hooked by it’s superior usability and amazing web experience – I can’t remember if the initial camera was great but it was better than any other I had used. There weren’t any apps on it but still, it was better than anything ever created. I’m not a fancy guy – I love sports and beer and geek hardware. I don’t sport logo’s on my car – although Microsoft wants us employees to – in Redmond you see this ALL over… The most popular around here was Microsoft’s “Where do you want to go today?” for a LOOOONG time – way too long in my opinion…
After using my iPhone for awhile I wanted to get new home computer – something with at least a quad core. I looked at the MacPro and fell in love. It was nice looking, quiet, super expandable and didn’t use any screws in the case so the upgrading experience was great. I ended up with a dual quad-core computer with 12gb of ram and now has 2TB of disk space. It’s the best Windows computer I have ever used. I do use the Mac OSX about 1/3 to 1/2 of the time – whenever I want to update my apps or do anything with Photoshop (bought the Mac License over the Windows one – with mild regret)… In my opinion it rivaled ANYTHING from Alienware at the time and was about the same price – and was more standardized… Have never had a significant problem with it and when I did (BootCamp & occasional system hanging when accessing disk resources in built in raid mode) the Apple support guys were right there to help… I don’t consider myself as being very creative and lord knows I wish my kids were more creative than they are. I think your opinion on the creative coffee shop logo flashers does exist – but I highly doublt that 100+ million Apple hardware users usually sit around starbucks flashing their logos… I think Starbucks revenue sheets would be higher – unless you’re suggesting that they just sit around, order one drink and gloat for hours taking up space…
I also have 2 Apple TV’s and my son wants one to – why? So I can hack it and install XBMC, the worlds leading open-source media player. It downloads (automatically) all information of your legally (or illegally) obtained movies from IMDB, displays cast information, wallpaper & DVD covers. It’s awesome, the Apple TV takes up little space, has no moving parts and the remove is small and very simple to use. And I don’t really care about iTunes, Netflix or any of that other crap because virtually every device made now has Netflix support. Best media player out there – as long as you jailbreak it… Oh, and streaming. Any youtube video, movie or music (iPod, Pandora, etc) I’m listening to on my phone or iPad can be ‘redirected’ over WiFi to my TV/Home Theater via the AppleTV… As I said – best solution available…
The iPad is the iPad – best tablet, all of my apps for my iPhone copies over with no extra license charges from my App library in iTunes.
I will give a little credit – and I do mean A LITTLE – to Google for upping the ante in the mobile market but not much more than that. It’s almost 2012 and Android still (mostly) sucks. Apple’s interface has remained consistant and Microsoft keeps mucking with stuff like tiles which is great on a mobile device but seriously??? On the desktop? I could care less about the start button but it ‘was’ at least familiar and dumping it WHOLESALE for a convuluted task & program manager combination based on your mobile? Yikes – glad I sold all of my stock and sunk it in Apple! Another AMAZINGLY wise choice I made… Has it dropped below $400? I bought it at $90 something.
I’m white but I don’t think that it matters. There are definitely people out there who don’t know better and buy Apple because it’s trendy but I don’t think that most people do anymore. They look at their products as technologically superior with extremely well written software and applications on top of it.
Hotmail invented free web mail, Microsoft bought it and scrapped what was underneath and didn’t do much to innovate and the interface isn’t much different then before. Apple created iCloud which has an Microsoft backend but redesigned it SO much that you can’t tell that you’re accessing a Microsoft server…
In summary, Apple makes good, solid and easy to use stuff that people like. Google and Microsoft don’t “GET” users. Apple does… Period.
STUPID. POINTLESS. BORING.
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