#64 Recycling
February 14, 2008 by clander
Recycling is a part of a larger theme of stuff white people like: saving the earth without having to do that much.
Recycling is fantastic! You can still buy all the stuff you like (bottled water, beer, wine, organic iced tea, and cans of all varieties) and then when you’re done you just put it in a DIFFERENT bin than where you would throw your other garbage. And boom! Environment saved! Everyone feels great, it’s so easy!
This is important because all white feel guilty about producing waste. It doesn’t stop them from doing it, but they feel guilty about it. Deep down, they believe they should be like the Native Americans and use every part of the product or beast they have consumed. Though for many white people, this simply means putting plastic bags into a special drawer where they will accumulate until they are eventually used to carry some gym clothes or bathing suit. Ultimately this drawer will get full and only be emptied when the person moves to a new house. Advanced white recyclers will uses these grocery bags as garbage bags.
If you are in a situation where a white person produces an empty bottle, watch their actions. They will first say “where’s the recycling?” If you say “we don’t recycle,” prepare for some awkwardness. They will make a move to throw the bottle away, they will hesitate, and then ultimately throw the bottle away. But after they return look in their eyes. All they can see is the bottle lasting forever in a landfill, trapping small animals. It will eat at them for days, at this point you should say “I’m just kidding, the recycling is under the sink. Can you fish out that bottle?” And they will do it 100% of the time!
The best advice is that if you plan to deal with white people on regular basis either start recycling or purchase a large blue bin so that they can believe they are recycling.
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white people are pathetic…….ha,ha!
[...] #64 Recycling [...]
what a ignorant thing to say, not only white people like to recycle!
You may be correct. But white people are the only people that matter. White people secretly believe that the world belongs to them; the non-whites are just living in it.
T u must b white!!
[...] Recycling is fantastic! You can still buy all the stuff you like (bottled water, beer, wine, organic iced tea, and cans of all varieties) and then when you’re done you just put it in a DIFFERENT bin than where you would throw your other garbage. And boom! Environment saved! Everyone feels great, it’s so easy! More > [...]
[...] entry concerning white peoples’ love of recycling. Here it is in all its glory… #64 Recycling February 14, 2008 by clander Recycling is a part of a larger theme of stuff white people like: [...]
[...] Christians are called to (Gen 1:26-30) and it’s an opportunity for us to connect with some folks in our culture (HT: [...]
Eventually White people will be into recycling their solar panels.
The recycling of garbage bags brings the two loves of white people together. The love of their dog and being able to use the plastic bag again to pick up the dog poo, the bag is then tied into a knot so that the poo and newly recycled bag can be tossed into the garbage. The knot must be tied tight enough that when the poo does decompose it will not escape the plastic bag. This makes all white people smile because they have also saved the environment from the poo.
I hate recycling. There must be something on this list I can relate to.
I use my plastic grocery bags as garbage bags on our recylced cans and in the bathroom trash cans.
I’m not environmentally conscience, I’m just cheap.
And aluminum cans still bring a pretty penny or 42.
Love,
American Whitey
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