#73 Gentrification
February 22, 2008 by clander
In general, white people love situations where they can’t lose. While this does account for the majority of their situations, perhaps the safest bet a white person can make is to buy a house in an up-and-coming neighborhood.
White people like to live in these neighborhoods because they get credibility and respect from other white people for living in a more “authentic” neighborhood where they are exposed to “true culture” every day. So whenever their friends mention their home in the suburbs or richer urban area, these people can say “oh, it’s so boring out there, so fake. In our neighborhood, things are just more real.” This superiority is important as white people jockey for position in their circle of friends.
They are like a modern day Lewis and Clark, except instead of searching for the ocean, they are searching for old properties to renovate.
In a few years, if more white people start moving in, these initial trailblazers will sell their property for triple what they paid and move into an ultramodern home.
Credibility or money, they can’t lose!
When one of these white people tell you where they live, you should say “whoa, it’s pretty rough down there. I don’t think I could live there.” This will make them feel even better about their credibility and status as neighborhood pioneers.
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Wow, am I the first White person to find this site brilliant? I think the “reverse racism” charge is bullshit. White people started this country claiming that conforming to whiteness, masculinity, richness and heterosexuality was the only way to be normal. And if you think that when someone who STILL feels that today is being “reverse racist,” you’re ignorant of what race even is.
It’s a shite position to be the white person who moved to bed-stuy not realizing that that was a racist and destructive thing to do. But it was. So face it and get out, and take your hand made mittens and fresh produce with you and leave the people of Bed Stuy and Bushwick to gentrify themselves. They don’t need your culture and values imposed on them to do it.
Kudos on the above written. Pioneers also equal colonizers. Love the idea of generalizing about “white culture,” as if it were some foreign custom. It kinda is to native New Yorkers. and to us ‘differents.’
Fuck liberal mono-culture America’s invasion of Brooklyn.
With love and sincerity,
Mickey G
when i was 9 i asked my dad what urban renewal was, he answered “negro removal” and went on to tell me how white people weren’t comfortable living around minorities but did want to live in “hip” areas, so would have all of the minorities moved out of an area in the name of gentrification… lol i still cant hear the words urban renewal without saying negro removal to myself lol
Dead on, Gentrification sucks, I live in the Bronx, NY and wow how has it changed. Before going away to college for undergrad and then relocating to Upstate for my masters you’d rarely see white people around my way, and when you did it was either 1), they were lost or 2), looking for drugs. Now all of a sudden its cool to live in the hood, lol, get outta here, thanks to you land lords jackup the rent, oh and btw the place isnt better, still the same shit whole
*hole
Screw gentrification. I grew up in an upper lower middle class section of Brooklyn with mostly asians and hispanics (Sunset Park) and it was great. When I meet intrepid, doe-eyed white midwestern-expat newcomers to NYC who have moved into predominantly black ghettos like Bed-Stuy, Brownsville and Bushwick I’m always like WTF?! Are you serious? I would never want to live in those places, even if I could find a two-bedroom with an affordable rent. It just wouldn’t be worth it to have such classless people as my neighbors. If I want to be around black people I just go to Boerum Hill or Clinton Hills or Park Slope where the black folks are educated, sexy and non-violent.
I resent your Bed-Stuy Statement…. for the most part those who hate bed-stuy havent spent anytime there. I am BLACK, educated and sexy and I love this neighborhood.
P.S.
Fuck gentrification
Cory brings up another good thing white people like, feeling like their individuals. Moreover, if this list does not apply to you, then clearly you are the wrong type of white person.
Their? Clearly you are also not the right kind of white person.
First of all there is no such thing as reverse racism, no offense Kyle, but racism is rasism no matter how you look at it. I get the fact that the overall idea of gentrification is jacked up. And moving the hood around does not solve the problem of poverty and poor education. But come on, author of stuff white people like. Generalizing all white people or whatever you want to call us, isnt the best way to get your point across. I grew up in the hood, got nephews, nieces, and sisters who are black. I think it might be a good idea if you do a little more research before laying your own clouded opinions on people. There are alot of “white people” who are down with gentrification, but not the only people! Looking at gentrification, racism, seperatism ect…. as a human disfunction might go you better, who knows…….????
You don’t really get this site, do you?
Yes, as the author said it:
“Get it? It’s not offensive, because when she says racist or sexist things she knows they are offensive. So it’s ok.” in “Sarah Silverman”
Maybe replace “she” with “I” and replace “things” with
“generalizations”.
I’m a white person (and a male, too) and NONE of this crap that “white people like” fits with me at all. I find it amazing that stuff I didn’t do combined with how much Bush sucks means I’m supposed to nod my head at this reverse-racist garbage.
good job taking the entire site so seriously
Boo-hoo! Stop yer cryin’! This site has it nailed on every aspect on what it is to be a middle-class white American today.
Bravo, Mr. White. You know me better than I know myself!
Do you mean to claim that white people are misunderstood? I’d say they’re over-understood…..
M
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