#82 Hating Corporations
March 5, 2008 by clander
One of the more popular white person activities of the past fifteen years is attempting to educate others on the evils of multi-national corporations. White people love nothing more than explaining to you how Wal*Mart, McDonalds, Microsoft, Halliburton are destroying the Earth’s culture and resources.
While the growth of multi-national corporations can be attributed to a number of complex social, economic and political factors, many white people prefer to take the word of two trusted sources: No Logo and AdBusters.
Published in 2000, No Logo has been responsible for more white person “enlightenment” than any book since the burning of the library at Alexandria. By reading this one magic book, white people are able to get a full grasp on the evils of multi-national corporations and then regurgitate it to friends and family.
Advanced white people will supplement No Logo with a subscription to AdBusters, where they will learn how to subvert corporate culture and return it to the masses. Specifically, this means taking ads and redoing them to give a negative message about a product. Apparently the belief is that when other people see this ad, they will be hit with an epiphany that their entire existence has been a Matrix-style manufactured universe.
If you plan to engage in lengthy conversations or get high with white people it is recommended that you read No Logo or one issue of AdBusters. Failing that, it is acceptable to buy a copy to leave on your coffee table. When white people see it, they will recognize you as someone who can see through the advertising and has a proper perspective on life.
When engaging in a conversation about corporate evils it is important to NEVER, EVER mention Apple Computers, Target or Ikea in the same breath as the companies mentioned earlier. White people prefer to hate corporations that don’t make stuff that they like.
Following these simple steps can help you gain the trust and respect of white people in a relatively short period of time.
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Since I live in Eugene, Oregon, and there’s this one local news magazine that’s always talking about hating corporations…I suppose I live in a VERY white city. So white, it’s like a polar bear blinking in a blizzard.
-MINESWEEP
I purchase all my items from Wal-Mart; this ensures that they are made in sweatshops by underage minority children being paid low wages for working long hours. I love colonization of third world countries more than anything.
LOL, most of your topics are just poking fun at hipsters…i love it!
Is this a Gossip or what? White people form part of campaign which is actually against the multi-national companies and corporate culture? how louder I can laugh Now! This is a real joke. There are campaigns of hatred. I agree. This is truly an assumption that white people as a whole community is trying to do this! We are aware of the bad effects of industrialisation in our day to day life. Let us work together with a view to protect the earth and not to distroy it. You cannot say what is right and what is wrong. But waiting for something proved may take your life itself. Then there never arise the question of multi-national, national or small scale industry. Eg. Union Carbide factory in Bhopal.
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