#105 Unpaid Internships
July 20, 2008 by clander
In most of the world when a person works long hours without pay, it is referred to as “slavery” or “forced labor.” For white people this process is referred to as an internship and is considered an essential stage in white development.
The concept of working for little or no money underneath a superior has been around for centuries in the form of apprenticeship programs. Young people eager to learn a trade would spend time working under a master craftsman to learn a skill that would eventually lead to an increase in material wealth.
Using this logic you would assume that the most sought after internships would be in areas that lead to the greatest financial reward. Young White people, however, prefer internships that put them on the path for careers that will generally result in a DECREASE of the material wealth accumulated by their parents.
For example, if you were to present a white 19 year old with the choice of spending the summer earning $15 an hour as a plumber’s apprentice or making $0 answering phones at Production Company, they will always choose the latter. In fact, the only way to get the white person to choose the plumbing option would be to convince them that it was leading towards an end-of-summer pipe art installation.
White people view the internship as their foot into the door to such high-profile low-paying career fields as journalism, film, politics, art, non-profits, and anything associated with a museum. Any white person who takes an internship outside of these industries is either the wrong type of white person or a law student. There are no exceptions.
If all goes according to plan, an internship will end with an offer of a job that pays $24,000 per year and will consist entirely of the same tasks they were recently doing for free. In fact, the transition to full time status results in the addition of only one new responsibility: feeling superior to the new interns.
When all is said and done, the internship process serves the white community in many ways. First, it helps to train the next generation of freelance writers, museum curators, and director’s assistants. But more importantly, internships teach white children how to complain about being poor.
So when a white person tells you about their unpaid internship at the New Yorker, it’s not a good idea to point out how the cost of rent and food will essentially mean that they are PAYING their employer for the right to make photocopies. Instead it’s best to say: “you earned it.” They will not get the joke.
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Unpaid internships are another form of R.O.P. (regional occupational program) class jobs, down here in the Palm Springs area, it involves hotel resort employment jobs and restaurant services. At least, the college students gets a grade, then an unpaid internship or a ROP class isn’t for any adult, single and raising a child. I went to a ROP class program in my high school senior year, didn’t do well in restaurant greeter and more was suited for dishwashing in the back kitchen. Was it worth it? I don’t know, but I got a “B” and it helps level out my final GPA at 3.2 (?)+
This is hilarious! I’m 19 and did an unpaid internship this summer with a non-profit for youth mental health. I complained about being poor but also talked about how I’m helping society.
PS
I’m a sociology major at a small liberal arts college full of white people. Sweet.
unpaid internships are nothing more than modern indentured servitude…..you do your work time for free, then at the end, you get kicked to the curb with not even a thank you….
To a very white girl, or anyone of whichever ethnicity- an unpaid internship usually sounds out of control and a waste of ones time but other ethnicities attend college- right? And to graduate college, or qualify for most graduate programs, unpaid internships are a requirement- not a choice. Ever been thankful your family doctor was able to fight off your “loved-ones” cancer, or successfully save ones-life in whatever dire situation? You can ultimately thank your physicians medical school for pushing their clinal hours which by-the-way were unpaid, for attributing their knowledge and expertise toward the particular medical situation. Outside of unpaid clinical hours, you can pretty much apply any dire need in which you needed some type of professional help to the same equation. Thank god for those with career passion.
As a physician, I recall getting paid during residency and fellowship…
im on this site…on my computer…at my unpaid internship! haha, infact were paying money so i can be near my unpaid internship!
Does this mean non whites like paid internships?
Freedomhaters.org has another really hilarious parody of Stuff White People Like.
Their entrees include, Madame Curie, Blackface, and The Music of Easter Island. I highly recommend checking it out here:
http://www.freedomhaters.org/content/yet-another-salute-stuff-white-people
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE, who only WASTE their time and money to search out unpaid internships.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
Well, good luck with that. You’re gonna need it.
Wow! Clander, Unpaid internships are “the next big thing…Thank you for posting this blog
i love this site, it pretty much defines the phrase “you’re the whitest black person i know”…
oh i love me some unpaid internships and i’m white.. it shows potential employers that i’m not totally greedy.. and that i’m a hard worker.. yeah white people rule
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