#116 Black Music that Black People Don’t Listen to Anymore
November 18, 2008 by clander
All music genres go through a very similar life cycle: birth, growth, mainstream acceptance, decline, and finally obscurity. With black music, however, the final stage is never reached because white people are work tirelessly to keep it alive. Apparently, once a music has lost its relevance with its intended audience, it becomes MORE relevant to white people.
Historically speaking, the music that white people have kept on life support for the longest period of time is Jazz. Thanks largely to public radio, bookstores, and coffee shops, Jazz has carved out a niche in white culture that is not yet ready to be replaced by Indie Rock. But the biggest role that Jazz plays in white culture is in the white fantasy of leisure. All white people believe that they prefer listening to jazz over watching television. This is not true.
Every few a months, a white person will put on some Jazz and pour themselves a glass of wine or scotch and tell themselves how nice it is. Then they will get bored and watch television or write emails to other white people about how nice it was to listen to Jazz at home. “Last night, I poured myself a glass of Shiraz and put Charlie Parker on the Bose. It was so relaxing, I wish I had a fireplace.” Listing this activity as one of your favorites is a sure fire way to make progress towards a romantic relationship with a white person.
Along with Jazz, white people have also taken quite a shine to The Blues, an art form that captured the pain of the black experience in America. Then, in the 1960s, a bunch of British bands started to play their own version of the music and white people have been loving it ever since. It makes sense considering that the British were the ones who created The Blues in the 17th Century.
Today, white people keep The Blues going strong by taking vacations to Memphis, forming awkward bands, making documentaries, and organizing folk festivals. Blue and Jazz music appeal mostly to older white people and select few young ones who probably wear fedoras. But that doesn’t mean that young white people aren’t working hard to preserve music that has lost relevance. No, there are literally thousands of white people who are giving their all to keep old school Hip Hop alive.
Even as you read this, white people are telling other white people about the golden age of Hip Hop that they experienced in a suburban high school or through a viewing of The Wackness.
If you are good at concealing laughter and contempt, you should ask a white person about “Real Hip Hop.” They will quickly tell you about how they don’t listen to “Commercial Hip Hop” (aka music that black people actually enjoy), and that they much prefer “Classic Hip Hop.”
“I don’t listen to that commercial stuff. I’m more into the Real Hip Hop, you know? KRS One, Del Tha Funkee Homosapien, De La Soul, Wu Tang, you know, The Old School.”
Calling this style of music ‘old school’ is considered an especially apt name since the majority of people who listen to it did so while attending old schools such as Dartmouth, Bard, and Williams College.
What it all comes down to is that white people are convinced that if they were alive when this music was relevant that they would have been into it. They would have been Alan Lomax or Rick Rubin. Now the best they can hope for is to impress an older black person with their knowledge.
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After 30 years blasting on the airwaves, Hip-hop remains an essentially “black” music form, despite it’s well listened to and loved by people of all races and nationalities. Since when white people dominated hip-hop? There are whites in the hip-hop scene and marketing the music to everyone, yet the first thing we think of when we think of hip-hop is…a black person in an urban setting speaks in a rhythmic mode. Hip-hop evolved beyond that stereotype in the 90s, so whoever writes the blog entry is stuck like 15-20 years.
I’m an old white lady and I think this blog is both hysterically funny and accurate. If you think it’s racist, that’s because you’re to old to really know what “racist” is. I’m 65. It was my parents’ generation who were racists…not all of them…but enough of them. They are all dead. Today the only white people who are racist have extremely low IQs and you shouldn’t hang out with them. If the only “talent” they can point to is the color of their skin, they are worthless idiots. Science has proven there is only one race anyway: human. But I digress. It’s entertaining to read this blog because it points out stuff you’d never realize on your own. (I thought everybody loved to camp and everybody treated their dog like a child.) Non-white friends never have the nerve to point this stuff out for fear of offending. Thanks for all the laughs!
The meaning of racist has changed, but for anyone who grew up in the 1970s to 90s are often told “that’s racist if you’re white and talk about the differences of black, brown, yellow or olive” people. Um…you mean cultural differences not someone’s skin color and the baby-boomers reacted at the images of civil rights protests or urban race riots on TV. In America, the weight of poverty or disadvantage was felt the most on black/African-Americans for about 500 yrs. but white people aren’t supposed to notice the impact of white privilege had on America for so long? Whatever. :-/
Sorry…I meant too young….not too old.
Anyone who has been to a party full of white people knows that they do not hate “mainstream Hiphop” it is all they listen to.
What is a white thing and black thing how can one person be like another person when dealing with race. whether white or black if that’s what you like then that’s what you like .I really don’t like this website cause it is racist .Do you think that just because white people like something that any other race will not. Actually the things white people like came from some other ethnic background besides camping.Maybe I should start a website called things black people don’t like
No, you don’t like this site because it states embarrassing facts. Did you even read the article, the person stated white people like old black music, no need to restate it. Finally, why did did you have to use “things black people don’t like”? Sounds like you are harboring some feelings towards us
Funny parody of Stuff White People Like:
http://trueslant.com/harmonleon/2009/10/29/a-salute-to-stuff-white-people-like/
Anyone who was around in the 90s remember this lyric from a not-so-much overplayed hip-hop track? “I like the way you work it, no diggity…yeah, why don’t you crank it up?” Not many stations it seems play No Diggity, but go over to the top 20 hip-hop songs white people like…and most of them are like yech…no good, and no NO diggity.
yall take yourselfs way to seriously…….humor anyone?
This site rocks my world….I’d have to say I’m guilty as charged on this one! Although I like 2livecrew, coolio and 69 boys just as much as tribe or one of those more respectable type old school groups. Ah…watched so much BET after I’d get home from my suburban middle school, then I’d have to turn it off when I heard parent’s cars pull in the driveway so I didn’t get busted watching TV on a school night
Ive got to say this one pisses me off. Im a white jewish girl who had zero white friends that listened to “classic/old school hip hop”. I am proud to STILL listen to KRS ONE, Eric B and Rakim, De La Soul, Tribe Called Quest, Poor Righteous Teachers, etc. because the message was there. I dont listen to todays hip hop very much cuz they lyrics, well, suck. Musically some of the songs are great! But you can not knock someone for still loving their favorites.
By the way, any words on how white America thinks Flavor Flav just became a star due to his ridiculous reality shows? I hate hearing white folks say “Flayvoor Flayyyyvvvv!” They have no clue what he is/was even about.
and thats comin from a white girl.
Corey, what you just said is exactly why this article was written and why this website even exists in the first place.
I believe the article was pointing out how white people like to believe that they are so ‘in touch’ with what’s hip that they entirely miss the point and fail to realize what really is hip to those who are outside of their little bubble.
Try giving your list to a black person under the age of 35, and watch how hard they try to not laugh in your face/take you seriously. That’s why on the top of the page there’s an image of De La Soul performing in front of a bunch of young white people…
I’m not white, and while I can see this site being snarky and mean spirited in a way, it also produces some of the best ironic comedy I’ve ever seen. Props to the author… and white people aren’t the only ones who enjoy some good irony. Don’t take these articles too seriously.
If you’re looking for some good hip-hop, check out lupe fiasco. The mans a lyrical genius, and hes so real
Perhaps you are talking about hipsters when you refer to white folk being knowledgeable in hip hop. Most other white folk (suburban white kids) are only exposed to the bubblegum hip hop played on top 40 stations (commercial), and to them, living in the hood is driving in a rimmed out car, wearing gold chains, bling and other materialistic items.
that’s what distinguishes good hip hop from the other. they share much of the same themes that you mentioned but are articulated much more creatively. lisyen to songs from jay-z’s reasonable doubt or nas’ illmatic, you get much of the same content as mainstream hip hop but it’s done tastefully.
Wow… I’m black, and I’m starting to think I have more in common with white people than I do with black people. Then again, broad generalizations about entire ethnic groups still kinda piss me off, even when they are stated in reference to white people… but they are kinda funny when they seem to be true. Oh racism… what would we do without it?
Peace.
Hmm…I have to agree with “Brandon”. As a non-white person, I can’t help but read this and think that although
some of this is funny ( I HATE camping!) – that it is a major
generalization of a group of people. Not only that, but it
seems to be directly targetting the ” hipster” generation
that has become more popular as of recent. I like Tribe called Quest and KRS-one because they’re good lyricists.
And when I read that the idea of Integrity – I thought that appealed to everyone…if white people think that only appeals to them out of “guilt” , then I think theyre being
a little bit self-righteous.
To come and think about it, white and black Americans have more in common than one realizes: language, religion, most customs and values, and supposed “long” history in the 400-some year old USA. The problem is, Americans of all races or creeds should find more commonalities they share, not fight over the pity difference of ones’ skin color.
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