#124 Hating People Who Wear Ed Hardy
April 13, 2009 by clander
Often it can be easier to find common ground with a white person by talking to them about something you both hate. Discussing things you both like might lead to an argument over who likes it more or who liked it first. Clearly, the safest route is mutual hatred. When choosing to talk about something that white people hate, it’s best to choose something that will allow white people to make clever comments or at the very least feel better about themselves. Currently, the easiest way to do that is to ask a white person for their thoughts on people who wear Ed Hardy.
Ed Hardy is a clothing company that makes a wide range of expensive t-shirts, hoodies, and jeans. These clothes are notable for their use of elements from classic tattoo design such as skulls, hearts, and dragons. On the surface, the use of the words “classic” “tattoo” and “t-shirt” would seem like a logical fit for white people, but it is not. White people hate these clothes unilaterally and it is advised that you merely accept that at face value. If you were to ask a white person to explain why a regular size dragon logo is ok but one that goes around the neck is not, you would be trapped in a long and fruitless conversation.
To put this in proper perspective, Ed Hardy is so hated by white people that it cannot be worn ironically. This is no small feat. As it stands, the only other entries in this category are Nazi Uniforms, Ku Klux Klan Robes, and self-tanner.
Since you cannot in good conscience have an Ed Hardy themed party, the best way to make use of this white hatred is to give your stories a little more appeal to white people.
For example, if you take the reasonable but not compelling story: “I got cut off in traffic this morning and when I honked the guy gave me the finger,” and replace it with: “I got cut off in traffic this morning by this guy in an Ed Hardy shirt. I honked and then he gave me the finger!” The story will become sixty percent more interesting to white people because it allows them to make a witty response like: “I guess that douche bag had to get to a UFC party or a nightclub event he was promoting.”
Follow this up with a laugh, a high five, and a compliment about the acceptable shirt the white person is wearing and you will find yourself with a new friend.
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Haha, Jon Gosselin.
Ed Hardy is the shit.
I agree. I guess white people can not bring themselves to embrace a lil wardrobe spice. Wearing khaki cargo shorts, flip flops and a vintage t shirt from old navy, walmart, and/or gap is the perfect summer uniform for white people…why mess with it.
yes! i hate guys who wear ed hardy. i call them “bros”
fuck bros.
Hahaha.
Ed Hardy boxers are actually cool… but anything else is totally douchey
Ed Hardy Shirts are a passing wave, they are indefinitly on thier way out. They swept the country just like Express 1MX button downs in the late 90′s -where you would see 400 gotti wannabes with the same superglued hair cuts- doused in obnoxious smelling cologne rolling up to the club looking like they have radiation poisoning twenty deep.
Good Bye Ed Hardy, you will not be missed.
To anybody who said anything relating to social status or class, unfortunatly there are 2 things money cannot buy- Love and Good Taste. Sorry about your luck kids.
stuffwhitepeoplelike.com, I think the writing here is brilliant- keep up the absolute amazing work.
-gold
Brilliant.
Correction: bluer eyes! Damn, I gotta slow down typing on here. This blog entry speaks more of classism, like these guys in Ed Hardy shirts can’t have money? Oh man, I need $25 to get anything with “Ed Hardy” written all over a shirt, or ball cap. Don’t forget the former symbol of rural poverty: the ripped holes on knee cap Levi’s Jeans from 1985! +
White people with double wides to call home? The people on the photo may not fit your “Aryan” race model, but sure are Caucasians of the Mediterranean branch or better known as “Hispanic”. If it weren’t for those guys in KKK robes and your fellow German National Socialists in brown uniforms or black boots, how can the current-day urban white elite have all that money and power from? White Power alright, you’ll deal with “the white man’s burden”. Now when are you gonna share the wealth with your fellow white men? You know, the ones from the deep south who attend Evangelical Protestant churches with whiter skin, blonder eyes or reddish hair, and Scotch-Irish surnames? +
If you take the shirts for what they are, and not who is associated with wearing them, a lot of them are well designed and pretty unique. The material is made and cut for people that are in shape. And the design is for people who want to stand out. What does that add up to? The perfect douchebag bait. But then again, have you seen a fat guy in a one? They would look more even more pathetic! But just as the popularty path that Von Dutch took,(which offers their once $100+ hats, now for around $20) they have got what the aimed for which was to saturate the market of people that are considered the upper echelon. But just as fast as they have risen, they will fall. I give the company about 3 more months and you won’t find one Ed Hardy shirt in the club.
Dear shicorps,
After reading your comment, I would have to say that I would hate you no matter what, even if you didn’t wear Ed Hardy.
Cheers,
musicianator
hahhahhahahhahahhahahhahha
i like you
Dude your response to shicorp…. lets just say you totally just stole my thunder. ROFL
g,
Answer Us this… does it makes a
Real issue worth
The disscusions on who wears what brand We tryin to figure out is it the price
The look(those who are secure in themselves) cus it seems leanin to stero-type based on the unjust reason(s) truly
By far be any hatred seems with cus be for any
Quote gay or straight guy whatever stews you hater PEOPLE WITH MONEY TO BURN
WEARS ED HARDY
CAUSE THAT SHIT NOT CHEAP OOOPS! Can’t sport that shit on short string budget you fools
Get some money and We all afford otherwise shut up punks and haters never quit
Money buys Ed Hardy losts of it too. Peace
ROFL!
Well, apparently all of that money couldn’t buy you a cogent sentence, or punctuation, I could only vaguely understand what you were trying to say.
Money doesn’t account for taste, I have plenty of money, and I don’t wear any of those douche wrappers.
Thank you for proving the stereotype “People who wear Ed Hardy are Douche Bags”. You are a credit to the species, now please go kill yourself.
It’s possible to spend alot of money on clothes that don’t make you look like a jr. high kid’s notebook scribbles. People consider Ed Hardy cool just because it is expensive, that’s why it’s for douches.
So, by your logic, a solid-gold toilet bowl would be worthy of praise. I can’t imagine what your house and car look like. Yikes.
how sad…he’ll never know the joy of explaning something with a well thought out and concise message…
Dear Shicorps, It doesn’t matter how much money you have if you speak with the intelligence of a broom.
That may have been the most unintellegent and incomprehendable thing that I have ever attempted to read. We can’t even tell if you are speaking negatively or possitively about this article. A blind person could have typed out a comment with less grammatical and spelling errors. Either way, Ed Hardy is for douche bags.
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