This is a scientific approach to highlight and explain stuff white people like. They are pretty predictable.
Media:
The Onion interview by David Wolinsky
Author Christian Lander, Authors@Google
This is a scientific approach to highlight and explain stuff white people like. They are pretty predictable.
Media:
The Onion interview by David Wolinsky
Author Christian Lander, Authors@Google
You’re a c*nt and your blogs sucks.
ed. note – I had to add a * to this comment to keep it clean.
one of the most brilliant things i have ever encountered.
Thanks for the ed. note. I thought you couldn’t spell cunt.
well I wanted to comment to say that blogging rachel ray/dunkin donuts is a MUST.
but wicks here is just too cute: “f**k you c*nt, rot in h*ll”
label to the stereotype: keeping things clean on a christian internet.
hail satan
there is no such thing as God since it is just something that people rely on to give themselves false security. also the christian internet would suck since it wouldn’t have porn which is 99% of the internet.
Ha. I hear Mr. T somewhere saying “I pity this fool.”
There is no such thing as Bo since that’s too ridiculous a name. A Christian internet would suck though since lolcats are satanic and would be banned.
Ok Mr. Lennon, whatever you say. One huge item overlooked about what (I can’t believe this) “white” people like… why not what “people like? Asians don’t like Dogs? Blacks don’t like yoga? Mexicans don’t like People who wear EH clothes? What are you 9 yrs old? First of all Ed Hardy and his stuff suck! Trite, over-situated the market with the same thing, had a celeb friend or two wear his crap to kick start it and now his own buddies don’t like Ed. Ed is an asshole. I quit even considering buying his stuff when I saw a bottle of hand soap for sale in a discount. The guy sold out quicker than U2.
Camping? Anyone who is an idiot likes camping no matter what color their skin is. Maybe in the UK it’s different. Camping. Yea, maybe if there are 20 rock bands playing all weekend and the booze is endless and the drugs don’t run out of gas.
Where the wild things are – Yea, strip joints. Who doesn’t?
Bob Marley – I’ll give you that one.
Moleskin notebooks – Wow, I’m getting one when the stores open this morning. I didn’t know we liked them. Thanks for the tip.
The one, the most important and truest to a fault – What people love to talk about themselves, they have a need to always be right, they will argue until they wear the other down and the person just says fukc it, you’re right, white people tend to be an expert on… everything! White people will judge you when they can’t get up from the gutter, white people have more double standards than anyone I know, white people will be your friend AS long as there is something in it for them, white people will steal shite from you, tell you it was stolen then help you look for it. White people are the only people I know who have a strong sense of entitlement no matter what. White people are always the victim, white people will justify anything and the most annoying is white people will not shut the fukc up.. Oh yea, don’t get me going on ho tightly wrapped white people are. Perhaps this will be the title of you next whatever it is you have coming out.
thanks for doing an incredible job making me feel like a horrible cliche…
i’d ace a “white person quiz” if you made one, which you should…
minus the infatuation with gay people and minorities and organic food… i’m pretty insanely white, apparently…
i second this motion
100% agree. I know realize what a stereotype I am. Well on the upshot, at least I’m a self-aware stereotype!
Me too. Except for the “having gay friends” one, considering that that I am bisexual…or does that make me even more white? I think that “pointing out grammatical errors” should definAtely be added to the list…
I am a soccer mom who wears New Balance and I ride my mountain bike on the trails when my kids are at soccer practice. I drive an SUV and regularly take Starbucks to soccer games to “get me through”.
Offended, eh? That’s #101.
i hate to come across as an ‘educated white person’, but i wanted to make a grammatical addendum that also serves as another white people like.
white people love grammar, even in the absence of following grammatical rules. white people will kill to be the guy/girl who’s in the room when someone asks, “is it it’s or its?” and actually answer correctly first (or perhaps not correctly, but still first, then say “oh yeah, that’s what i meant” if corrected – it only matters who’s first)
anyways, you can’t say “your blogs sucks” – whenever an adjective modifies a noun that is plural, the adjective must be singular, and vice versa – as an example:
“your blog sucks” – singular noun, adjective w/ “s”
“your blogs suck” – plural noun, adjective w/o “s”
this is the rule always, and it is a GREAT party-conversation for the following reasons:
1) nobody realizes its true until it’s spelled out for them, and the best party-stories are matters-of-fact that cause brief-but-non-threatening moments of realization that for white people inspire euphoria greater than anything you can imagine
2) everyone will give at least 3 examples for everyone to be like “holy fuck, that’s totally true” and “oh yeah, that works also,” thus getting everyone involved in a non-threatening and open way
3) the whole convo will last no more than 4 minutes, the maximum attention span of a party-story, no matter how interesting
4) it’s almost as good as speaking a foreign language in terms of likelihood-to-get-a-white-guy-laid, as women will settle for the grammatically-skilled if the white guy who speaks a foreign language at the party is already spoken for. if a woman cannot raise her future children in a multi-lingual environment, she will at least settle for a grammatically-correct environment
Yr not getting laid; “suck” is a verb.
FYI the use of “suck” or “sucks” is describing what this blog might or might not do and as any good whitey knows a word that describes something can be called an adjective. Perhaps in this case it’s an adverb but more importantly who TF cares? I will most likely be getting laid!! Ooooh…FACE!!
Regardless of your sexual prowess, you don’t have a clue about grammar. A verb is not an adjective.
And, apparently, “troll” is both verb and noun, as demonstrated above.
No it cannot.
Nice call, jackass.
Adverbs describe verbs, like “quickly” in “quickly ran.” The problem was that the “blogs sucks” uses a singular form when it should be the plural form. Idunno why Will had such a long explanation though. I think trying to make it look complicated boosts his ego? I imagine it was just a typo.
I suck
You suck
He/she/it sucks
We suck
They suck
Yep – definitely a verb
Actually, “suck/sucks” is mostly used as an adjective these days. If what one means is “That’s awful,” then one will usually say “That sucks.” In that instance, “suck/sucks” is being used as an adjective.
Therefore, Will is right in saying that one cannot say “your blogs sucks.” It is simple 9th grade grammar that one would have assumed everyone should know by now.
I am an English Education Major and a writer. I most definitely know what I am talking about when it comes to grammar. Let’s see if I can diagram this out for everyone a bit:
“Your” — a pronoun showing possession of the noun
“blogs” — the noun being possessed by the pronoun; because the noun is in the plural form, it implies that the person “Your” is referring to has multiple blogs. This is not the case — there is only one blog, with multiple posts — and is therefore the grammatical mistake.
“sucks” — would normally be used as a verb. However, due to the modern connotation associated with the word, in this sentence “sucks” is being used as an adjective, meaning “awful” or “bad.”
Hope that this has cleared a few things up, or possibly told you that you need to re-learn your grammar.
Just thought I would point out:
It’s just “anyway”, not “anyways”
Pointing out irony and grammar via my macbook while listening to Pedro The Lion.. this blog is spot on.
oh my god, i have spell checker on my macbook too!
That’s embarrassing; “suck” is a verb.
I suck; you suck; he/she/it sucks; we suck; you (all) suck; they suck.
Note the he/she/it. English verbal person/number marking is impoverished, but not non-existent.
There isn’t number agreement on the adjective, by the way, or else we would have “your reds blogs” vs. “your red blogs” or “your blogs are reds” vs. “your blogs are red”.
(White people love over-education, right?)
This is the most exhilarating conversation I’ve been a part of in ages. To have finally found a home, a community, a milieu (white folks love that word).
SUCK…like many words, can be a verb or adverb or adjective (or even gerund) depending on how it is used in the sentence. You all have valid points, but are looking at the word and failing to look at how the word is used in the sentence to come up with what part of speech it is.
Someone needs to break the sentence down in order to get the answer, the definitive answer.
However, it won’t be me. I am too busy putting on my New Balance shoes.
I don’t see how “suck” in that form can be an adjective or an adverb.
“Suck” can be a noun, if it is used to denote an act of sucking. This usage is relatively uncommon.
He took a long suck from the bottle.
In the sentence in question, it is most definitely a verb. “Your blogs [suck]“, indicates what the blogs do. An adjective would give a characteristic of them, which is not indicated. For the word to function as an adjective, there would need to be some kind of copula, as in, “Your blogs are suck”, or the adjective would come before the noun, as in the fragment, “Your suck blogs”, either of which would make it obvious that “suck” doesn’t work as an adjective because both phrases are gibberish. Similarly, it wouldn’t be an adverb because that defines the properties of an adjective, verb, or other adverb, and since “blogs” is a noun, you can’t apply an adverb to it.
Glad to be of service.
Ding ding ding! Finally someone who’s not ignorant. Thank you Lord! (and I’m not referring to God but you, Lord Dan)
Is the grammatical error (incorrect usage of “its”) in your post intended to be ironic?
How can you care so much about grammar and not bother to use appropriate punctuation?
How can you care so much about grammar yet not bother to use correct punctuation?
Totally true, another good one that most people won’t know, and some will openly deny until corrected, is that the word “both” is not limited to describing two nouns for example, both walter, jerry, and larry went to the movies works. Also, white people love to be able to use the terms clause and preposition
I refuse to believe that this is true.
I think you’re mistaken about “both”. I’ve never, ever heard a credible sentence in which you could put more than two things under “both”, otherwise you would use “all [number]“. Perhaps you were thinking of how you can set off multiple denied possibilities with “neither”, which, while also rare, is tolerable: “Neither Walter, Jerry, nor Larry went to the movies”. Similarly, you can’t have anything “between” more than two things; it has to be “among” them.
For decades, a burning question of mine (well beyond St. Paul’s “Why don’t the damn Ephesians ever write back?”) is: Why do the British say, for instance, “BritRail suck…” when Americans say “Amtrak sucks…”? Maybe an assumption that BritRail is a collective of individuals, whereas Amtrak is a corporate person? Am I deluded? My sanity rests upon an accurate answer to this question. TIA.
Most English people don’t really use the verb ‘to suck’ in a pejorative context, unless they’re especially Americanised. But if we did say “BritRail suck” we would be incorrect, because BritRail (despite being made up of several people) is a singular noun. Are you sure you’re not just extrapolating this from a small pool of British/English people you happen to know?
Also, I have no idea what ‘BritRail’ is, but that’s probably just my ignorance.
For decades, a burning question of mine has been why do Americans say, for instance, “Radiohead sucks”, when British people say “Radiohead suck”? To me the American usage sounds awkward and wrong, akin to saying “They sucks”.
Similarly, Americans might say, “Radiohead is a band. They are from England”. It’s consistent to use the third person singular “is” for the first sentence and switch to the third person plural “they are” for the second.
I first puzzled over this when I saw a badge that stated “Blondie is a band”, during the 1970s, so this question has indeed burned for decades.
Regardless of the explanation I will undoubtedly feel smug and superior, which is one of the great things about being white.
I agree with Bob. I have actually taken my study abroad to the extreme and stayed in the uk after graduation and have noticed the is/are difference in speech. I feel incredibly superior when speaking this way in the US, especially when talking about Rugby and underground music.
To answer your question quite simply, it is because American English does not look at it as third person plural. it is a collective now therefore it acts as 3rd person singular. For example, the team is winning. Not the team are winning despite the fact that the team IS made up of more than one person. Thus, Radiohead ROCKS and Radiohead is a band. The consistency is there.
i rock we rock
you rock you all rock
(s)he ROCKS they rock
Quick question.
Why do Canadians and English say “He’s in hospital.” instead of “He is in the hospital”? Why do they never say in/at? It drives me crazy.
Thanks.
I’m Canadian and I’ve never heard anyone say, “He’s in hospital”…EVER. Perhaps you are mistaking rednecks and yokels for a representative sample of the population. More research needed on your part.
Being an Englishman living in Canada it never ceases to amaze me how Canadians have a thing for euphmisms, I think that’s spelled right, such as a real problem for saying I want to go to the toilet, rather they need a washroom, they ask if they can get something to a clerk at a store, as oppose to can you get me
Perhaps you are hearing impaired. That’s all I can say miss.
No offense buddy, but writing a long response about grammer is pretty “white,” or whatever you totally racist people say
There is no such word as “anyways”.
I’m white , and this site is so totally awesome . Keep up the good work man.
David Duke is proud of everyone on this blog!! We need to celebrate chaining black people, killing off the indians and all other forms of genocide that makes this country great!!! Kudos for this blog!
You hadn’t killed enough of us white boy. I’m 1/4 American Indian and my French father had relatives fought Nazis in WWII. You believe having white skin makes you better than everyone else? Uh huh…how much money you got? +
Hi,
I was wondering if by white people you meant yuppies and/or hipsters alone. See, my friend seems to think that this site is only about yuppies. Clearly it states it is about white people, not necessarily yuppies. While I do agree that a lot of these are about yuppies, I don’t think that it’s a site dedicated to stuff yuppies like. Please answer my question. Thanks.
I wonder if only white people archaically cling to the question mark to help indicate which of their wonderings are in fact questions needing response.
Welcome, electric and Friend. You have reached the White vs Yuppie-Hipster dichotomy at the ninth level of eternal wisdom. First must answer this, little grasshoppers. If white people shake they ass when the music start, do they know what it’s like to be black?
I am white and I think this website is hilarious and very true. People should be able to have a sense of humor about this stuff.
Please pee on yourself. Please.
an *
fucking stupid blog
you must not be white
That’s an oxymoron.
mhaha.
a whitebread austrian thanks for the blog – jössas, geil!
i just found this blog and you are now bookmarked. what is life if you cant laugh at yourself. you make me proud to be white!
Where’s the love?
I bet that’s an angry white person that lets out its anger within virtual territory- let them come down to bed stuy and talk shit, but, oh wait, i forgot, they can’t cause they’re white!! hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!
seriously? this is the funniest blog i’ve ever seen! Couldn’t stop laughing.
thanks wicks! i was temporarily confused as to why you would call this brilliant satirical writer a “cant”.
A cogent argument, Wicks, and eloquently stated.
To Wicks, who made such a great first comment at top of the page…..LOL
You must be white since one of the things on the list is “to get offended” hahahaha
Obviously which you must be to write such a immature thing. Someone needs attention!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Speculating about another person’s race based on his/her response to something and then ending your post with a long string of exclamation points doesn’t leave you much room to call people immature.
wow, it’s a joke.
I’m white, and I find the site hilarious. It doesn’t all have to be true, but it is pretty funny.
Hi. Love your blog. Have you considered writing about how white people love going to camps or retreats? Growing up in an all white neighborhood (yes I grew up being one of two brownies in my entire class), I remember it was all about going to girl scout camp,band camp, field hockey camp or volleyball camp. The best part of going to camp though was when some of the extra-cirricular activities involved learning African dances or other types of exotic hip rotations. Have you ever seen white people dance tribal? Priceless.
Greetings from Brussels – Have a good one.
Terri
or an Americ*nt?
I think he’s talking about the lady in the picture
your blog is funny. my wife wants to suggest another white person favorite: ethnic jewelry. keep up the good work, we’ll be reading it often.
is it me or do white people LOVE outdoor music festivals like bonnaroo, austin city limits festival, and bumbershoot.
Who doesn’t like an outdoor music festival?
Don’t get all like defensive. All my white friends talk about are outdoor music festivities. And plus I would like to attend one some day.
#96 Sweet Baby Jesus
Of course white people love outdoor music festivals! Where else do we get to wear our outdoor gear, listen to our favorite obscure bands, and be outside all day?
I second ethnic jewelry. This should also be expanded to cover ethnic/tribal tattoos.
Love the blog
Genius. In fact, I think this falls under a larger umbrella in which whites who are not Hispanic, Arab, or Persian feel the need/desire to establish that they do harbor a cultural identity nonetheless.
I chalk it up to a general sense of disenfranchisement among whites – that to be white is to be painfully normal, without cultural heritage (particularly in America), to lack a sense of brother/sisterhood with other white people, and a general fear that any attempt to establish such a kinship with other whites would come off as white supremacy and racism.
This brings up another thing white people like: genealogy tests – often necessary in order to prove that you’re “not just white” but rather something interesting, like Portuguese.
Portuguese is good, but still relatively common. If you’re gonna go European, you have to be a little bit more obscure – for example:
“My grandmother came from the Isle of Skye, but my grandfather’s family is originally from Alsace-Lorraine. It explains my affinity for both Talisker single-malt scotch and various cheeses.”
That way, you’re not just white, you’re transparent.
Oh, and disenfranchisement, while not only strikingly accurate, is a total white people word. I love it.
Freak! We like it ‘cuz it’s PERTY!
So, according to you:
White = of no culture, not interesting, painfully normal,etc.
Nice.
Hysterical. How about decluttering, closet organizers and feng shui? NPR? CBC? Tanning beds? Organic food? Botox? Summer camp? Private schools? Horseback riding?
So many inexplicable obsessions. So little time.
Ps John Stewart is hot.
How about soy milk (with or without coffee)? Definitely reading this site a bit at a time, I can only laugh so hard for so long! My only comment is that most of the white people posting on this site seem to be comfortable laughing at this stuff…I can’t help but wonder what sort of horrible politically incorrect ruckus a site called stuffblackpeoplelike would cause. Or maybe not?
HA!..soy milk in coffee my brother does that kind of sh*t. I prefer half&half myself.
On the topic of adding new things… I think we need a shout out to monograms. This is especially true of the upper crust white people group. It can go on golf bags, polo shirts, even underwear. White people just can’t get enough of putting their name on everything.
So true. Love a monogram!
soy milk make my throat close up. Does that make me white? Being allergic to something that no one is allergic to. Maybe I’m just really sickly, I do visit the hospital a lot. Also my name is spelled wierdly it’s pronounced Adam, but spelled Adom. Maybe cuz I’m gay
Well there is a site called Stuff Educated Black People Like and it’s damn accurate too. http://www.stuffebplike.com/
But I don’t think many white people will get it unless they have EBR friends ( I have several). If anything, my white-washed sister and I seem to have more in common with white people which is kinda embarrassing. In fact, my sister just started doing that scarf thing but she’s a damn hipster and can’t help it
That link didn’t work. Is the site down now? It’s been over a year since this post but I’m definitely interested in seeing the site.
and The Sopranos..surely
who else is gonna like tanning beds? black people?
Ha! That was brilliant! I’ve never known any black person to use a tanning bed (and I never have either, but that’s b/c I am part hispanic/Choctaw…and I can prove it).
Yes, whites do like geneaology…go to Utah.
Now I feel white.
This is the best blog I have read for a while!
are you trying to say Mormons are white?
“Yes, whites do like geneaology…go to Utah. ”
We got some multi colored Mormons in NY….
Or are you saying that genealogical
obsessiveness is a predominately white
mental illness?
and Anderson Cooper…
White people have an inordinate fondness for Fescue. They despise crabgrass.
Golf of course, counts twice.
This site is closer to “Stuff Yuppies Like”.
I agree.
Another thing white people (mainly yuppies) like: self-loathing.
Or, stuff second generation of baby boomers/hippies upper middle classers like. Which, well, I guess I am one of.
Good thing I grew up in redneck Maine and like to beat my dog and drink Bud, because that makes me really everything it means to be white.
Unfortunately, you are just under privileged.
Great blog! As a white person with a white wife, i identify with nearly all 47 items. I would certainly add spending time on a farm, lake swimming in New England/Upstate New York.
Too much
DP
I am 100% in agreement with Vanessa.
There are not really 49 things here. Organic food, vegetarianism, and Whole Foods are essentially the same entry, broken up and spread out- “filler”as I believe it’s known. Poor writing, that.
Also, I thought for years that I was white, but now I’m going to have to figure some stuff out, because I only like 5 things on this list.
Leta,
Whole Foods sells meat (i.e., not mutually inclusive of grass eaters). Organic food can be warm-blooded.
What have you done, of note, creatively in the last several decades to back your unrefined criticisms?
Just interested.
P.S.
I bet you secretly like more than 5 of the things on the list you just don’t want to seem that white because, I bet you*, you are most certainly grade A whitey material.
*We white folks like to bet people
Someone must of infiltrated your family tree.
Hey, Thurston Howell the Third,
I must correct your grammar. You have used the commonly misunderstood vernacular “must of” when in fact I believe you meant to use the term “must have” or perhaps the contraction “must’ve.” Sorry, I couldn’t resist that one.
white people also enjoy being critical, but not necessarily in a constructive way.
p.s. i’m half chinese.
lena and vanessa, I think they are talking about white people that are socially and economically important, so yes you guys are correct
this seems like a guide on how to help the immigrant to succeed in the world.
“this seems like a guide on how to help the immigrant to succeed in the world.”
sara on February 4, 2008 at 4:29
I will let you know how this works out for me.
Thanks
Great site gentlemen.
I just found your website and look forward to review its accuracy and providing peer review. I am heartened that others are adopting a scientific approach to the study of White People. I employed such an approach in my seminal article on the topic The Top 10 Rap Songs White People Love.
OMG. This is f*ckin awesome. I am the son of a Japanese-Amerikan father and Scottish/German/Native-Amerikan mother and this sh*t is right on the money. Absolutely Bananas. I am curious to know what the ethnicity of the person/s doing this blog are? It seems they are either a person of color who knows white -amerikan culture very well, a mulitracial person like myself, or a very attentive, extremely analytical white amerikan.
LOL @ Sarah Silverman btw.
PEACE
Senbei
Hmm… I think most white people are equally multiracial… Let’s analyze this…
(Japanese+American=Half Japanese)
+
(Scottish+German+Native American=Red Neck)
=
You are really just 1/4 Japanese, which makes you basically a typical American (white person). White people try to pretend they are in the know because their great great grandfather came from Germany.
“Claiming to be multiracial when both of your parents were born in the US” could be yet another article.
You’re an idiot. Japanese-American means his father is of Japanese descent, but grew up in America. Assuming equality among the posted nationalities, which is genetically impossible without extreme intermarrying, the poster would be 1/2 Japanese and 1/3 white (1/2 Japanese, 1/6 Scottish, 1/6 German, and 1/6 Native American).
And when did American become synonymous with white?
I am confused. In every white math class that I have been to, as well as the white coffee shops that I often frequent, in Middle Eastern countries, I know that 1/2 + 1/3 does not equal a whole.
(I actually just had a conversation about how it is almost impossible to be 1/3 anything, in a coffee shop in the Middle East…)
Especially as you assumed that Japanese-American refers to the offspring of two Japanese parents who grew up in America.
Therefore, why is 1/2 Japanese brought into the equation (of 1/3 white)? (In any event, *he* would only be 1/4 Japanese if his father would be the offspring of a mixture between a White and an individual of Japanese descent).
Using “The Man’s” logic, the poster should actually be 1/2 Japanese, 1/3 White (Scottish and German), and 1/6 Native American (which is definitely not White, as the “White Man” came and gave them smallpox, raped their women, and stole their land).
“I am confused. In every white math class that I have been to, as well as the white coffee shops that I often frequent, in Middle Eastern countries, I know that 1/2 + 1/3 does not equal a whole.”
I am confused. What do white coffee shops and the Middle East have to do with your not understanding that the 1/6 Native American was implied (to me, at least). I will admit that starting a post with “You’re an idiot” seems to be a recipe for contentious replies.
The Man (as ridiculous as that name is) included the idea that being 1/3 or 1/6 of any nationality “is genetically impossible without extreme intermarrying.” That being said, I would not assume that anyone is 1/6 anything just because s/he includes it in her/his makeup, since the person probably isn’t including all the nationalities involved. Maybe the poster will explain what exact percentage of each nationality he is so we can really figure this fucking thing out, including whether or not Japanese-American means a person of Japanese descent raised in America, or maybe we can move on.
Regarding the importance of perfection and one-upmanship here displayed, I have a question and apologize since this should be in another chain: why don’t more people use possessives before gerunds?
1/2 japanese, and most likely 1/4 european and 1/4 native american. assuming, of course, that the mother’s parents consisted of a full blooded native american and a super white person.
ultimately, it’s impossible to figure out for sure.
Very common to hear about intermarriage between Blacks and Native Americans, then came the Portugese Hawaiians, Punjabis from India with Mexicans in California, and even Japanese-Cherokee marriages in the L.A. metro area when the two groups lived aside in the early 20th century.
Now the white people once boosted to have money, stock market bonds, ivy league degrees and professional careers all because of pure white ancestry…is envious in wanting to be part-something (not limited to Cherokees), they will be “1/5 Cuban” or related to a Zulu princess tomorrow. +
Rumors allege that Wallymart will soon offer DNA tests, although
a mole in the software developer leaked that they’ve been asked to program that all results are to show “majority white.” (snark)
It was an attempt at humor. (Whites love coffee shops and talking about their travels.)
Steve, racial identity has doesn’t have to do with where you were born. It’s how you self-identify among broad ethnic groups. I think you mean “claiming to be multicultural/ when both of your parents were born in the US.”
You could be identify as black or Asian(ethnic asian) and have both parents born in the country.
I would also say that anybody that is 3/4 white and 1/4 something else generally are accepted as, and are identified as white.
I agree that if both of your parents are of Euro or Native American descent you are white.
“I would also say that anybody that is 3/4 white and 1/4 something else generally are accepted as, and are identified as white.”
Unless the 1/4 is black, in which case you and your descendants will always be black until you’re light enough to pass for white.
Why are you saying Native American = White?
‘Cause most rednecks are part injun. Until the 70’s they hid it — then it became cool and they all found that their great-great grandmother was Cherokee (’cause Cherokee is cool, unlike Massapequod, and there was a cool song in the 70’s about Cherokee).
Now, in ten years, they’ll also find out that great-great grandma was “passing” and they’ll start to claim that they’re black also. But they won’t say black but make up Ibo or some other african tribal link. Family albums from the 1890’s always seem to have missing members.
They did a PBS show tracing the ancestry of black celebrities. The host, a professor of African-American studies who was dashiki wearing, well it turned out that he was mostly of French descent, while the “white” biologist who did the DNA was 20% African. Whiteness is in the clothes.
Sorry, can’t let this one go. Unless this is a really bad attempt at humor, you obviously don’t know what a redneck is. Like any good white person, you should do your research. Watch the History Channel. Google “redneck.” White people like Googling, so show us your stuff.
sod, my seed is pure (from the book “Keys of Tulsa”). They hid the American Indian legacy from the WASPs, but found a way to claim an older ancestral presence in the 1980s from the likes of Cher. Btw, most white Californians could start claiming to be Armenian, the “Semitic” people from the Caucasus mountains in an exotic place known as the Asian continent. +
(Cherokee+other American Indian+3/4 white=minority)
(French+Scottish+German+English=white person)
What’s wrong with this picture? Are white people this obsessed with ones’ racial pedigree? I don’t know what gives to be more white or more non-white than thou, but how about the leader of our country is, as follows…
(Kenyan Muslim father+Irish American mother=Barack Obama)
But to a racially charged hell-bent internet troll, they may well go off on the (black man+white woman=interracial) or worst (illegal alien+terrorist with Arab name=9/11 flashback).
sorry we don’t see race, we are all children of the earth
What, you got a gerbil in your pocket? Who is this “we” you speak of?
Snort. ROFL.
Something else white people love: claiming to be “colourblind”.
Hint: doesn’t make you seem less racist. Makes you seem unobservant.
I liked it better when the flickr stream was just titled “Jess’s Photos” without explanation. I also like to believe that Jess is not someone you know, just someone whose photostream perhaps came up on the first page of google results for a search like ‘white people photos’ or maybe even ‘white person lifestyle photos’
We listen
Also, in a reciprocal bout of intersite promotion, Catsandbeer.com intends to review for accuracy your first 100 White People stuffs once you reach the century mark
Have you been following me? I mean, you’ve described me (and everyone in my trendy startup coworking loft) pretty much exactly. I mean I’m not vegan, but I eat vegan food.
Scary. You know white people all too well. As a citizen of Boston, I say you know us well!
- binge drinking
- shooting classmates
- traveling abroad
“You’re a c*nt and your blogs suck”
Aw, come on Wicks, if you can’t laugh at yourself then you are doomed. This stuff IS kind of yuppie. This is a great insight into how consumerism, political correctness and too much trendiness creates laughable behavior. Wake up fellow white people. You’ve only yourselves to blame.
Every race has what I call “those of us who are an embarassment to our kind.” You cold even break it down into decades because what white people liked in the 90’s was different than the 80’s or 70’s etc.
This is the kind of stuff that Frank Zappa used to sing and write about. “Disco Boy” anyone? This kind of self-scrutiny is desperately lacking these days.
Bravo!
Ha yes, or “Valley Girl” anyone?
Oh, and you forgot…Guitar Hero.
LOL!
Oh, and you forgot about “LOL!”
I don’t get it. To lump all people with limited melanin and European facial features seems kind of silly. White isn’t a country, ethnicity, culture, or religion… unless one is a White Supremacist.
Please remind me again how stereotyping people based on the relative dark or lightness of their skin is funny again… I must have forgotten.
My thoughts exactly.
This site is incredibly racist. If this site was dedicated to pointing out what black people like, it would surely be deemed as racist. Why aren’t people proud to be white? Everyone should be proud of their own respective races and not bring down another’s. Multiculturalism will never work when sites like this one are up and running. This only causes racial tension.
I happen to be white and proud (and I love sushi)! This site has nothing to do with racism and everything to do with having a laugh.
and that kind of earnest pride is exactly the kind of thing that blocks people up, causes tension.
Satire, however, if one can unclog the constipational force that is altruism, lets out some steam in the form of laughter. Science has yet to prove this, but maybe it even loosens the bowels! And that’s something we can all be proud of!
totally satire. and white men of privilege already have a “heads up” as far as society goes,so boo-hoo, whitey… this shit is funny, any way you slice it. and a really great critique of bourgeoisie self-pity, you know the kind with the “needs” of “others” in mind, while the same people wouldn’t be caught dead on public transit for the fear of of the “others” that they have pre-decided the “needs” of. oh…by the the way, can you add public transit to the list?
white person
Tensions is right, you need to march yourself into the washroom and take a firm hand to yourself…
It’s little wonder the price of clown boots has gone through the roof…
“This site is incredibly racist. If this site was dedicated to pointing out what black people like, it would surely be deemed as racist. Why aren’t people proud to be white? Everyone should be proud of their own respective races and not bring down another’s. Multiculturalism will never work when sites like this one are up and running. This only causes racial tension.”
That’s why it’s called satire. Lighten up already.
“This stuff IS kind of yuppie. This is a great insight into how consumerism, political correctness and too much trendiness creates laughable behavior. Wake up fellow white people. You’ve only yourselves to blame.”
Exactly!
This is one of my favorite sites ever int he history of the internet. Of course some of it hits close to home (I mountain bike and drink mocrobrews). But unlike a good chunk of people who do these things I have a sense of humor about the pretentiousness that surrounds it.
Renovations is the funniest one.
#22 AGREED!
And judging by the sub 5 second 40 times of the people behind this site, it is obvious that they are not white
Terrell Pryor’s indecision on signing day doesn’t help either
Ha! This NPR-listenin’, irony-lovin’, bike-ridin’ white guy LOVES the HELL out of this site. Just added you to my blogroll and will check back often.
Cheers, all.
I have topic for yo:. Buying clothing with the store’s name plastered all over it (Abercrombie, American Eagle, Aeropostale, The Gap, etc).
White people buy clothing from those stores because those stores are considered “cool” (ie expensive). That’s why they make sure to buy clothing with the store’s name on it. They want to advertise that they shop at those stores, and are therefore “cool.”
Uhhh, no we don’t do that. Did you not read this website? Especially the article on hating large business and corporate logos? You will likely see us wearing products such as “Nau” (pronounced “now”) or others that were created from sustainable products that boast no logo. Unless of course it bares the logos for Patagonia, North Face or REI. Hey man, I’m a card carrying white guy from PA. I buy into the carbon neutral “adventure trips”, sport the roof racks and don the gear. Abercrombie or AE will only get me kicked out of my earth friendly micro-brew.
I do believe blacks wear clothing with labels all over it as well: SouthPole, FUBU, Phat Farm, etc…..
this site is only funny to white people. White people love to think they are cute and funny in some way.
totally. this site is like filling white people’s gaping loss of a sense of community. its also hip to like this site.
Thank you for an informative site. As a nonwhite person this blog has helped me to understand white people better, and as a resident of Oakland, Ca it has helped me to understand the entire city of San Francisco. I feel this newfound insight will help reduce how often I yell at white people.
LOL!
For awhile, most of the white people up there fled to either San Jose or Santa Rosa between 1950 and 1990. Now the trend went into reverse and its’ the blacks or east Asians in a flight out of the cities of Oakland or San Fran. The Central valley, alike Southern Cal. is “browner” than lily white parts of S.F. plus the black middle class exodus eastward into the Sacramento-Stockton area. +
big <3
Have you considered stand up comedy? I am a hybrid, non-black, 1/16 native American, irish, german, blah, blah, blah. If I were a dog, I would be called a mutt!!! People love mutts!!! I’m a short squatty mutt with shaggy hair and I love my tummy rubbed just like all the other non-black hybrids out there!!! They just don’t want to admit that being a mutt is all part of the American way!!! We all need to look at ourselves, look at others, look at how we’re all really funny, and laugh!! Wake up people!! White people do funny things like get mad when someone says we’re predictable and we like natural medicine!! How many non-whites do you see at your local farmer’s market or health food store!? Black people are funny, Asians are funny, Indians (native and otherwise), Amish are funny, Spanish are funny!!! We are all funny!! That’s how God made us!! Are we supposed to be serious all the time!! NO! God has a sense of humor- how could He not have one- just look at yourself!!!
Adding tendency to over use exclamation points.
SWINE FLU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah, I must had scared you straight. But the white people are so sensitive to the fact the swine flu originated in Mexico, let’s not call it the “Mexican flu” OK? That’s racist, xenophobic and makes the Mexican people look dirty. Remember SARS? And how we feared the Chinese? We called it the “South Asian Racial Syndrome” but we added a ‘H’ in the end for “Hysteria”. +
Hey, Ruralmomof3 wouldn’t happen to be NON-BLACK would she? How many times can someone forced casually include that little tidbit. You confirm for me that “non-black” people are weird and use too many exclamation points. Cheese.
Hey, I do like my exclamation points but do “yoginipirate”s always aske questions they already no the answer to? My second sentance tells you who I am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
as an occasional guest columnist, let me say i love white people enough to study them/us very closely and even ask them/us why they/we do the things they/we do. it just seems strange that alot of them/us do the same things. is it scientifically generalizable? hell yes. and my phd will prove that.
Somehow I doubt that your PhD (yes, there’s actually an order to the caps & little letters) will prove that “them/us doing the same things is scientifically generalizable”. Idiot. You’ve GOT to be white to try that hard to be smart & miss. You’re what they’re making fun of, dumb ass.
White people like to sugar coat negative thoughts, experiences, and feelings. Men must not express feelings. Sex is sort of beat around the bush and operates under some form of abstract oppression. Drink milk and then smell like it. Are focused on the outside and materiality. Will usually go along with what an employer wants good or bad. They like to feel like they are in control, nosy, questioning the obvious……………….
“Sex is sort of beat around the bush…” Wow! Right ON! As a
single, never-married, extra-shy whitey, I didn’t know there was
any other form of sex. Awesome (but sorta lonely.) Oh, well…
Gluten-free/dairy-free/food allergies in general; not vaccinating their children; Montessori schools; learning about the lives of their ancestors in order to find difficulties with which to relate (i.e.: my nana came to the United States on a boat when she was 12 to escape the Irish Potato Famine/my grandfather didn’t have shoes during the Depression); therapy; 12-step programs/rehab; nannies; social networking sites
These weird parents fear the A.U.T.I.S.M. comes out of the vaccine to prevent the upcoming “scary” swine flu pandemic. It’s like a flashback of a time the kids fear Polio in the 50s, but more of the early days of AIDS in the ’80s when people thought you get the AIDS from a black person or a gay man. Btw, I have a high functioning type of autism my whole life, and in my late 20s so I remember when most people outside the neuro-psychiatric field didn’t know a thing about autism.+
Ooh, & “loft-style apartments”
ooooooh…and “gentrified rock”, while they condemn the corrupted corporate music industry. Rock on, whiteys. +
I have to admit, this site needs to be called
“stuff liberal hippies like” since it basically encompasses everything an anti-american, liberal, Berkeley loving, sandal and tie dye wearing, New York Time reading hippie would like. Other than that I absolutely love this site, these liberal creeps do display such contradictions with everything…I love the holding high diversity but sending their ids to private schools. These people needs to get to work and contribute to society.
I’m pretty sure my first blog “stuffsandniggazlike” is going to start off much more problematic than the blog that inspired me to have to do it
doobeedeedoo
White people like all the vacuous things I say.
My only regret reading this blog is that I didn’t think of it first. Amazing!
your blog is funny, but you are an idiot. this should be called what rich democrats like. and by saying that, you’re saying only white people are rich democrats. which is a pretty ignorant statement. go back to your red state pulpit.
White People might not truly like, but they do appreciate, ethnic minorities.
Nothing racist about this blog. ANYONE with a brain and a penchant for the sublime would get this.
I “get this” and many others will, too. The humor is understated and it’s droll, too..
You keep it up. Include more posts about sushi and shopping at Chico’s and you’ll have me hooked like White People on Valium.
Which are blue, by the way.
All the best,
LK
I’m mixed race, but my African genes are most apparent. Love your site. The perspective you have is interesting– that one should know these things in order to get whites to like you if you’re not.
Whoa! That was some of my white coming out, over analyzing.
Okay. How’s about whites think they have all the information, and are genuinely surprised if a not-white has some. I’ve had many whites say to me, “I don’t know how you know that.”
Not in a bad way– just genuinely surprised that I know something they don’t.
Mkaibynow
I love how people are getting nitpciky over the name of the site. You don’t get it. If it was called “stuff liberal hippies like” it would lose about 45% (the same percentage of whites who are in plays at some point) of what makes it hilarious.
As anyone heard of free speech? I think this is hiliarious that alot of people are getting bent out of shape b/c of one site. If you dont like it, dont read it! But for people with any kinda of brain, this site just makes you smile b/c you can relate to so many things on it. ie… The kitchenaid mixer, and the renovation.
This is truely the greatest blog I’ve ever come across in. my. life.
this is the funniest blog i’ve read in a long time
As a black “sistah” I find your site hilarious! “White people” is a bit general, though. Should I take it to mean Americans? My Euro friends and I are having a hollerin’ discussion about this. Personally, I think if white people joined the rest of the planet and realize that they are people of color also, we’d be better off.
Identifying with white, isolates you, and y’all are too small a percentage of the world’s population to be isolated. Besides, who wants to be isolated in this wonderful world? That’s why she’s carrying a black baby.
Has anyone suggested “having alleged Native American ancestry” yet. Many white people love having a “great great grandmother who was a Cherokee princess.”
This is my new favorite blog!
A sure sign of being in an oppressed people, how about the African-American self-titled “prince” like Malcolm X and the descendants of the Egyptian pharoah or Jesus Christ? LOL! White people, as well black people and any other people can be delusional. “I AM THE LIZARD KING”. +
You’re absolutely right, “Stuff White People Like.” We should all stick with the culture our skin gives us, never travel, and of course avoid engaging with those who look and speak differently than we do. I plan on never leaving my hometown and eating potatoes and cabbage for the rest of my life.
re: disgusted
It sounds like you support local agriculture. Keep fighting the good fight.
re: disgusted
Bravo on your decision to support local agriculture. Keep fighting the good fight.
you forgot a classic:
White people love to wash their hair *after* they wash their bodies. We also tend to skip using a washcloth – either soap directly on the skin or one of those funny looking sponge things.
I think you have an entry here around toiletries/grooming habits.
you also need an entry on the Wii
I second AJT’s Wii suggestion!
funny stuff, but why do get the strange suspicion that a white conservative republican is behind this site? with a few exceptions, you could replace “white” with “liberal” … NPR, The Daily Show, Prius, Natural Medicine, Vintage, Awareness, Arts Degrees, The Sunday New York Times, Indie Music, Apple products …
Thoughts?
Pizza Bro!!!!! Wait, youre probably saving that for #1! Good call!
how about “graduate degrees”?
great site. this list reminds me a specific theatre teacher who loves yoga, organic foods, money and gifted children of racial minorities (combined a couple items on that last one). did i mention he lives in north dakota? while the state is almost 100% white, i don’t really believe anyone actually loves it. hmm.
You forgot blogs. White people LOVE blogs.
I love this site more than you can possibly imagine. Amazingly on-target.
judging from the comments, how about “reading blogs self-referential, sarcastic blogs”?
what’s your connection to toronto? cuz you seem to have one.
i LOVE your japan entry and bikes entry. so true!!!
i would like to add:
-having or going to the cottage (young privileged white people with a lot of money)
-keeping their shoes on in their houses (i’ll never understand this)
-hip-hop
-punk
for the lefty, urban, environmental, university crowd:
-ethnic street food
-public space; car-free sundays
-being sympathetic to immigrants of colour while having nothing to do with them
-community shared agriculture
-drumming
-m.i.a.
-deconstructing capitalism
-knitting!!!
-activism in latin america
-indian food
-ethiopian food
white middle-aged lefty people:
-adopting a kid of colour
20-something liberal white lefty people like saying:
-”all the races should mix and then there’d be no racism”
-”mixed race kids are beautiful”
-”that’s reverse racism”
and i totally agree with #18, esp. the shooting classmates one.
hilarious, my friends. PLEASE keep it up.
see… my problem is that i’m latino, and seemingly enjoy way too many things white people like. it is with deep regret that i must renounce my rican-hood, and return my secret arroz con habichuelas decoder ring to the home office in santurce, puerto rico.
This was pretty damn funny. I liked a few things but over I’m very upset that you used the word “Scientific” come on think of a better word. “Indisputable” or “Exactamondo”
i wonder why my comments are all deleted?
Brilliant! I’ve just discovered that in spite of my own beliefs of uniqueness I’m a predictable white cliche.
Thanks for helping to see the light/white — I think
clap clap clap
Two white people sent me a link to this blog today. Though I fulfill #11 Asian Girls, I grew up with too many white kids and unfortunately too much of this blog applies to me. White people (including myself) love this blog!
Summering on the Cape
California Closets
Lily Pulitzer
“Wintering in Lake Placid” – 2nd home for the holidays.
“Moving out of California” – Got too liberal for them.
“Lily white Uruguay” – a Spanish-speaking country.
White people got to have a townhouse in the L.E.S. NYC. +
So, I totally think this site is hilarious. Of course, being day-glo white myself, it seems fitting… That having been said, I also think that it’s even funnier since most of the commentators on here believe that the words “liberal,” “Democrat,” and “leftist” could easily replace the word “white.” Maybe it’s just me, but I’m a conservative, registered Republican (although I may betray my party during the upcoming election if SOMEONE, anyone doesn’t come out of the woodwork to represent the Republicans in a decent fashion), meat-eating, gun-shooting, religious (God forbid!!) white, AND YET… At least half of the stuff on this site applies (sad but true), although I am not and will (hopefully) never be as snobbish and hypocritical as some of the things on this list imply… And as for the rest that don’t apply, I know at least a dozen white people with similar value-systems as me who actively practice or have practiced the other half. And maybe it’s just me, but I also think that it’s absolutely hysterical that people think that this site is racist… Just because certain things seem more typical to one group of people over another doesn’t make it racist. It just makes a stereotype, and sometimes (such as in this case) stereotypes can be damn funny.
“environmentalism”
“investment portfolios”
“the Internet”
Playing around with communism (how fun can it get?)
University bachelors’ degrees (it’s like having an ID).
Reading ink-and-paper for news instead (not this site).
And wait, there’s more of white people’s likes and gripes comin’ rite up. +
“orange juice”
“Vitamin Water”
…and don’t forget Absolut vodka! Clear, plain & white, just the way they like it: best mixed with O.J. and berry flavored water. +
“feminism”
Once associated with communists and Jews according to right-wing extremists, feminism is now a major feature in conservative Christian politics: Sarah Palin? Yah, yoo betcha. It’s like the neo-cons claimed JFK and MLK among their own: “If they were alive today, they would been conservatives” said Glenn Beck. +
I like your site. And while not all of this applies to everyone, the generalization/stereotype is fun.
I think it’s interesting that some people are offended though. it’s about the laughs..
i third the Wii
and agree with some other comments about the writing being lackluster in some areas.
gated communities?
new balance?
messenger bags?
> messenger bags?
Asians like those at least as much.
o o o o! white people also like:
recycling
green peace
peta
along the lines of “feeling better about themselves” even though all of it’s bullsh*t! (been watching too much penn & teller).
“Facebook”
O, white people……
“indoor voices”
LS:
I guess you’re right. But I would have to dispute the difference b/w hello kitty messenger bags vs. jack bauer 24 messenger bags.
“voting”
Yet only 40% of Americans bother to vote, most of us think it’s a game, a bunch of politics or stuff we don’t care about. Most people who vote are white, but over age 65 and male. They determine who gets elected the most anyway. +
For those who think this site should be titled “white yuppies” or “white hippies” I believe it covers all white people who went to college and according to white people that would mean every white person. I’m guessing this site is written by an asian guy who had to live with white roommates and inevitably learned every predictable thing they do. (It’s too insightful for a white person)
Golf has to be added. White people love it, because they think it’s a sport, although it requires no exercise. They think it’s the hardest sport to master, yet the easiest to learn and white people business meetings center around it. Not to mention the thousand dollar golf vacations.
why do you think it is an Asian person and not a Black person or anybody else?
“novels”
“attempting to pronounce foreign words in the accent of the language of origin”
Mey-Hee-Ko! Fa-ronz! and Hee-Ran! Mispronounce these words and they call you a friggin’ uneducated racist. LOL! +
This is interesting. The satire is pretty funny and edgy, that’s for sure. It just feels too forced. The older ones are great, the newer ones…not so much.
“honesty”
True story:
I’m staying in Singapore with white friend. White friend’s azn husband comes home to find me sitting on their porch (I know it’s hard to imagine a porch in Singapore but really, this is a true story.) The following exchange ensues:
Him: (After pleasantries) Why are you outside?
Me: It’s… nice?
Him: But… it’s outside.
Hilarious website. Assists! I can’t believe someone dropped a Terrelle Pryor reference on this site.
Portland
Palestine.
Adoption.
LOL catz.
Sundance films.
Capoeira.
Knitting.
1990s VH1 nostalgia.
Admitting to liking things that are supposedly embarrassing, like Britney Spears or Disney sitcoms.
Claiming they are ’socially awkward.’
oh man capoeira is spot-on! When I was about 10 we had a capoeira demonstration at my progressive middle school.
Hysterical, my friend. How about wines/micro-breweries white people know nothing about?
Thankyou, Thankyou. esp. your meditations on Arrested Development and Indie music!!! this is not a racist site, this is brilliance.
oh and i want to defend salvage capoeira from the above comment: please specify capoeira regional (loved) from capoeira angola (too African and Rootz to be loved or known by even ethnic searching whites)
when do they come out with stuff black people like
Guys, I’ve been reading Stuff White People Like since at least December. It was way better then
hahaha
Brilliant ! Keep up the good work !
Hmm, yeah, absent for some reason:
Hockey
Golf
Hunting
Driving Big Ass SUV to McMegaChurch
Country Music
Voting Republican
’sorry we don’t see race, we are all children of the earth’ – right, just until it’s important for you to specify, like when some stupid white guy has a slip of the tongue and you get to call him out.
This is a funny blog, even funnier the fact that if it was written about any other race, it wouldn’t be funny. Glad to amuse the other races!
I love how some of these commentors go out of their way to specify that they’re not totally white. Ironic, because, you know, I’m white and that means I love irony.
My sense of humor is pretty broad, but white bashing is getting kind of cliche. Say what you want. Maybe we do deserve it. I’ll laugh, but I don’t have to.
Enjoy!
This is the reason racism will never die, because race humor will never die.
“can we all just get along?” – white liberal steals a quote from Rodney King during the L.A. riots in ‘92. Never since the tumultous summer of ‘67 did white people reacted in fear, or in the words of radio comedian Phil Hendrie (before 9/11 occurred), “the worst case of fear by white people against a non-white race since World War II” (the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor). +
man i got bored and didn’t read the whole thing, but is dealing with white guilt by enjoying lighthearted racial satire on the list? it really should be!
also maybe i don’t get the point, but most of these things seem kind of general. i half expect to see something like
Water:
white people love to drink water! they love the way it hydrates their bodies and allows them to live! What jerks!
White people really like saying, “Wake up, people!”
I love this site more than life itself
White people like sleeping with black people.
White people will STILL be bread out of existence!
The brown people will rise and cover themselves with butter and jam.
They will then lie down next to large bathtubs filled with chai tea.
The more posts you make the faster yellow people will procreate.
The harder you try to be funny the more brown people will overpopulate your states.
The longer you trash liberalism will bring about the day black managers will downsize your division in favor of outsourcing to the third world your jobs.
Bwa ha ha ha ha!
Self-loathers, beware: there’s nothing wrong about being white. Love who you are.
White people like foreign and exotic art in their homes. Preferably from their time in the Peace Corps.
This is very, very funny! But it would be far more accurate to call it “what Liberals like.” You could then creat another blog entitled, “what conservatives like.” You would have plenty of material for each.
Let me get you started on the conservative thing (I am one.) Conservatives like to drink beer from the bottle — it makes them feel rugged. Even conservative women like to drink beer from the bottle because that proves that they are not stuck-up, which of course they are and rightfully so.
Maybe I should just start it myself…
Stuffconservativeslike:
1. JESUS CHRIST! JESUS LOVES YOU! WWJD!
2. Red meat, fresh from the hunting trip.
3. Shopping at Wal-mart like it’s the place to go.
4. Abstinence, being married, never divorce.
5. Country-western-rock-pop hybrid music.
6. AM neocon talk radio or FOX News on TV.
7. Mobile homes, trailers or double-wides.
8. Traditional values like condemning gays, atheists and creationists.
9. Waving the “ol’ glory” flag, red-white-and-blue.
and 10. Media censorship if any “private” parts are shown (i.e. medical journals or art museums). +
How did it do that? I cancelled the last post and still it appears. Damn computer. Must be a bug hidden in my PC somewhere. I hope it’s not a virus. +
Stuffconservativeslike (now there’s a site speaks to them):
1. JESUS CHRIST! JESUS LOVES YOU! WWJD!
2. Red meat, fresh from the hunting trip.
3. Shopping at Wal-mart like it’s the place to go.
4. Abstinence, being married, never divorce.
5. Country-western-rock-pop hybrid music.
6. AM neocon talk radio or FOX News on TV.
7. Mobile homes, trailers or double-wides.
8. Traditional values like condemning gays, atheists and evolutionists.
9. Waving the “ol’ glory” flag, red-white-and-blue.
and 10. Media censorship if any “private” parts are shown (i.e. medical journals or art museums). +
“White People Like…”
-to take the piss; and to have the piss taken.
-to giggle when people just don’t get it.
Many thanks from a new reader!
white people really like hugs
In response to comment #13:
If you don’t see race, mylosh, why would you make such an aggressive attempt to define and criticize this “white” pseudo-race?
The things you list are merely stereotypes (which exist for all races, ethnicities, whatever…) and people like you acknowledge, and thus perpetuate them.
You should more accurately rename your blog to “results of mass marketing” if you really want to raise awareness.
Preoccupation with race is a waste of everyone’s time.
White people like emoticons.
They could make a site about what black people like, but it would just be called: “What white people will like in 20 years”.
As my name said, I’m about as white as white can be and I find this site hilarious. I’d agree that it’s more “stuff affluent white liberal yuppies like” than all white people, but whatever, it’s damn funny and good commentary.
And from the comments here, you have a future topic for stuff that white people like – pretending that they don’t see racial divisions and differences, unless it can make them look/feel good.
You need to do an entry on “The Food Network”
“World” music
Ahhhhh good ol racism at its finest, cept if you call this racist then obviously you’re a skinhead. Oh wait I’m not a skinhead. I pity white people, getting blamed for things they didn’t do.
I didn’t get that far into it, but aren’t you describing hipsters, a descriptor that transcends race and gender? Other than that, its very funny…really…and anyone who leaves a post saying how “hilarious” or “witty” it is is really intelligent also…I love pointless, pretentious drivel.
Dear white people getting offended by this blog:
This isn’t racism, and getting offended by the list just makes you look stupider and whiter.
Sincerely,
White person
White people love me. They want my black ass to go free. Shit, those white people are crazy. Sure, I plugged a pig, but who cares, right? White people worship me. They hang on my every word on NPR and prison radio. Keep on keepin on. Word up. Live from Death Row, this is Mumia Abu-Jamal
@ #51 disgusted
You suggested the following (with my added comments):
“You’re absolutely right, “Stuff White People Like.” We should all stick with the culture our skin gives us, never travel outside of the country in which we live, never recycle, always stay indoors and watch loads of mindless TV shows/soaps/dramas with cheezy acting, buy the most expensive “bling bling” image-carrying products and fancy cars, consume tons and waste tons, and of course avoid engaging with those who look and speak differently than we do. I plan on never leaving my hometown and eating potatoes and cabbage for the rest of my life.”
No, if the writer were to put stuff like that in the blog, then the title would change to “Stuff that White People in Red States Like”, or “Stuff that Nouveau Riche Browns/Blacks Like”, or “Stuff that upper middle class Asian People living in California Like”.
Come on people. Nothing’s sacred here. Laugh a little.
Topic suggestions:
-”Park activites” (i.e. “throwing the disc” and “picnics’).
-”Volunteering” ..(try Habitat for Humanity- also a great place to meet the opposite sex evidently)
-”Community gardens”
-”Music Festivals” -Coachella, Bonaroo, etc.
Get off your ivory tower and find better things to do with your time to sit around judging people. Do white people enjoy sunshine and the laughter of children as well? How dare they! Worst blog ever.
“22 Anonymous
This site is incredibly racist. If this site was dedicated to pointing out what black people like, it would surely be deemed as racist. Why aren’t people proud to be white? Everyone should be proud of their own respective races and not bring down another’s. Multiculturalism will never work when sites like this one are up and running. This only causes racial tension.”
White people love the word “multiculturalism.”
I am not ashamed of being white.
Nothing to apologize for ’cause of my skin color.
White people enjoy writing stupid pointless blogs…much like this one
Maybe calling people c*unts should be on there, what an idiot…
I think blogging should be one…
I think a lot of the list is about being a white middle class USA citizen of a certain age since, although I am white, the majority of the posts had nothing to do with me, and many of them described people I know in another country where I have lived for 29 years, and those people do not speak English or look at all white. However, the writing is very enjoyable and the commentary {OK, I don’t have the TV} is hilarious.
Being away from the US for so long, the constant referral to 80s music mystified me, and when I finally read that part I was still puzzled as I don’t know what it is. But at least now I know why I do not really understand the new white people that show up here and they are always trying to explain to me something I have no idea about. On the other hand, when I did live in the US decades ago, the people who were crazy about all things Japanese happened to be my black friends and the Puerto Rican males in Manhattan wished that they were in fact Bruce Lee. I attended many a Bruce Lee marathon on 42nd Street with the Hell’s Kitchen Kung Fu afficionados and serious students {of Master Lee, no relative of Bruce} over 30 years ago.
Anyway, I will tune in for the laughs, no shortage of that here.
I await the Latin Version.
THIS IS MY NEW FAVORITE WEBSITE!
A friend forwarded it to me in an email today. Best thing I’ve read in ages!
WELL DONE! KEEP IT UP!
Not only humorous but critical and as I can see it has created a much needed dialog.
RACISM: ALIVE AND WELL
DEAL WITH IT PEOPLE.
- White people order will order a single dish for oneself when eating at Asian restaurants. The concept of eating family style exists only they eat at Buca Di Beppo
- Drunk white girls really like Hip Hop music.
- White males enjoy talking about and supporting professional sports teams as if if the teams were a member of their own family, most often in a bar setting. However, black/brown/Asians seem to dedicate their focus on individual players more so than the team.
Can’t think of anything else.
paddy?
sounds like YOU
hilarious, this blog is about me!
Zanalee – You must not visit many websites if this is your favorite. Don’t set your sights so low buddy, you can do better!
calling yuppies ‘white people’ is moronic and is offensive to:
1) white people who aren’t yuppies. the majority of white people are not yuppies, they’re working class people who shop at wal-mart.
and
2) yuppies who aren’t white. yes, there are many, many yuppies of color out there. they’re just like the white ones.
Anyone who is “contemptuous” or offended about this site has no sense of humor and doesn’t know any white people!
No one “calls” themselves a yuppie proudly. I’m black (and educated and surrounded by alot of white people) and I probably like at least 50% of the stuff on this list. Of course, just like white people like some of what black people, and asian people and hispanic people like. Is it racist that I want asian’s to cook my chinese food and hispanic people working when I go to a mexican restuarant??
This isn’t rascist – its satirical. Get a sense a humor! And yes, it would be just as funny if it were stuff black people like. Dave Chappelle did a skit called “I know black people” which was a game show based on the same concept and it was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. And one of my white friends was very proud that she could answer almost all the questions.
Anyone getting upset about this needs a life.
Off to Whole Foods to get some Organic Milk and Green Tea! Right after my yoga class…
Obama ‘08!!!!
Oh, I forgot, continuing with the sports theme..
- White people in red states have 2 religions (christianity and football with college football having a favored status).
- White people in blue states tend to favor pro (NFL) football and are knowledgable about soccer internationally.
- White people in red states view soccer in the same light as they do communism.
This site is offensive and stupid. You are dissing recycling as a “white” activity. Maybe your next post should be “books.” Here’s how it could go:
Books!
Books are filled with words, and white people love to open them and stare at the words as they turn the pages. Sometimes they even laugh out loud while they are doing so. A lot of times white people read books and claim that they learn something new. How white is that?! Sometimes white people even like to spend a lot money on books. Almost as much as on vegetables. Yes, books are lame and so are white people so remember, don’t read because that is so white.
Here’s a suggestion: “Blaming themselves for black underperformance.”
This isn’t a list of what white people like… it’s a list of what liberal, hippie douchebags like.
I could sure go for some sushi right now…
I think this site is closer to “What rich, white liberals like. . .”
I think alot of people need to lighten up. I can see how this would be viewed as racism – unfortunately it is notoriously hard to prove racism against Caucasians.
But this is a JOKE. People make worse jokes every day. It’s not like it’s being put forth as a bonefide truth of life, chiseled in stone and left for the ages. Move on.
This is very funny and it’s also vaguely angry/hateful.
The more interesting thing is that it’s insightful. It’s pretty rare to be able to give this much perspective on culture- because either you’re an outsider and you don’t understand it, or you’re so surrounded by it that you don’t have perspective.
And I guess it’s a good thing, because it seems like white culture is the norm or the ideal that everyone else should aspire to. This shows in a really brilliant way that it’s culture- just like everyone else’s culture. Some parts are good- some bad.
In case you’re curious- I’m half-arab, half white.
The next blog entry should be “White people secretely enjoy reading websites that mock and degrade their own cultural norms.”
But really, this site isn’t that original. Anyone who is really aware of underground culture comedy knows blackpeopleloveus.com was doing this exact thing at least 10 years ago. (And, as any white person knows, older stuff is always better. That’s why Sonic Youth is way better than Death Cab. Sell outs.)
This concept is kind of old, now, but still a good source of witty quips for white people to post on their Gtalk away messages or Facebook profiles. Everyone knows white people love citing ironic quotations. It requires no actual intelligence or insight on their part, yet it allows them to present themselves as having both.
I haven’t read all of this yet, but I think every single one of these things applies to me.
Also, please add that white people love pointing out how “insightful” or “interesting” something is, without actually explaining what they mean.
Andrew-
It is insightful- that seems inherently obvious. And I’m not apologizing for using the term. Just because white people use it doesn’t mean its bad, anymore than it i means that it’s good.
This person does a good job of describing what white people like and why. He/She does it in a detailed way. That is interesting.
The descriptions of people’s intentions are pretty spot on. That’s insightful.
Andrew – how’s the view from your ivory tower?
My favorite is #50 – Irony
as such, everytime a white person likes something a white person isn’t supposed to like he is still falling into his own stereotype because he likes irony.
So saying white people like irony is akin to saying white people can like (or dislike) anything, everything, or nothing and they’re still being stereotypically white.
even better is that apparently white people are supposed to hate white people who vote republican, which would indicate that some white people are supposed to like hating themselves.
apparently white people are supposed to hate KFC as well, which truly is ironic, given that KFC was started by a white guy.
I’m not white, but I am an anthropologist and this caught my attention. I know a lot of people that have commented here believe that you’re being funny, but there’s nothing mentioned on this page to indicate that you are indeed attempting to be funny…which would otherwise be more worrisome than funny
you get my drift?
but here’s my contribution, watching DIY shows (HGTV, Food network, etc) even if they never attempt a thing…
I know, you could have one about health insurance. White people have more health insurance than any other ethnic category in the US. Why do they like health insurance so much? Health insurance is so white!
Thanks for deleting my post. I think this is relevant. Why not let others decide for themselves?
This site is satire if the author is white. This site is racism if the author is not. Whats good for the goose is good for the gander, and the goose has already been cooked countless times by the ethnic minorities suppressed and ridiculed by the overbearing white grind.
White people like to look at pictures of a blogs author. White people like to feel like they share a connection with an author that they like, or that they have nothing in common with an author they dont like. White people like to make fun of themselves, but only when they feel a connection with the person making fun of them. White people, deep down, dont like to be wrong. It makes them uncomfortable.
White people with enough sense not to drown standing in the rain feel self-conscious about engaging in conscious racism. White people engaging in unconscious racism dont like to be called on it. White people engaging in unconscious racism will continue blithely onward, telling themselves, This is different. This has real merit., until someone smacks them in the face with a metaphorical car door, as they ride by on their $5,000 bike, on the way to the sandwich shop where they volunteer for the humane society, and on weekends teach black kids to read.
See that? That is a stereotype. It sure stands out, does it not? Why? Because you think Im white.
White people like to feel a connection with the author of material that makes fun of them. Otherwise, they start getting uncomfortable. White people dont like to be wrong.
By the by, you have a column made up of the most profoundly racially polarized material Ive seen since i left the GNAA website, and you put a * in CUNT? Please, grow up. Your so called morality is shifty, baseless and without merit.
Expect us
It’s so awesome that so many people are getting upset with the title and the content. God damn…if it was called What Black People Like, written by a white man and every other article was about Martin Lawrence and Tyler Perry, THEN there would be cause for concern.
All you whiny folk need to simmer down. Because one thing white people DON’T like is a cry-baby. Oh, and the Wayans Brothers…
While I don’t really find this blog offensive, I think the logic of your comment is a little off. A stereotype is a stereotype. You’re making the classic argument that some stereotypes are acceptable while others aren’t. I guess I just need a “why this is” and “why this isn’t.”
Please take the content and publish it in book form when possible!
LOVE IT!
I know what us white women like. Stealing black men and their big black phalluses from the black women that can’t take care of their man.
absolutly, I think some black men find white women adorable.
– old hiphop slang (see also, use of “diss” and “bling” in white-speak)
– big words when little words would do just fine
– touching black babies
– commenting on black peoples’ hair
– volunteering at community clean-up days (i.e. picking up ur trash)
– white people in the movies talking black (“you got me straight tripping, boo” ; Rappers Delight rapping granny etc)
– people who care what white people like
keep up the good writing! very funny, thx!
This is a very interesting site, I’m Canadian, err sorry I meant First Nations. I have a lot of white friends and this absolutely describes them! but, although they do not describe themselves as “white” but by their “roots” such as “Scots” or “British” type of ancestry. cool site.
I find that this blog is more specifically about stuff that yuppies or WASPs like.
White people like sports…that is so them!
Maybe I should start a competing blog about what they like. I don’t want this blogger having a corner on the market. The whole “what white people like” industry is about to explode!
You could just call this the Connecticut blog!
Any a you white ladies wanna get together wit a playa? We could go to Popeye’s first, get us some popcorn shrimp, french fries, an I got me some grape drink and strawberry wine. We could party down white girls. I don’t care what you husband or boyfriend think. I laugh in his puny white face.
White people love jobs.
Heh, funny site. Racist, but still funny.
Racsist! See my blog for what nigger likes.
[...] About Stuff White People Like Quote: [...]
heeheehee
this blog makes me giggle
I think this site is run by a conservative trying to discourage U.S. minorities from engaging in things like recycling and volunteering by labeling them as inherently white activities. There’s no way to tell appearance of the author but I would bet it is a white male.
I’m a white uppermiddle class woman, but I can’t relate to about half of the stuff that I’m supposed to like… I don’t own a single apple product, I like cats and not dogs, and I studied science in college.
Ohhhhhh, people who are offended by this… lighten up. It’s satire; it’s funny. It’s not meant to be offensive. Sure it promotes a stereotype that no one person identifies with 100%. And, of course, not ALL white people fit any of these discriptions. But, as someone who’s about as lillywhite as they come, I say it’s incredibly accurate. I’m proud of my Scottish (white) heritage, but not to the detriment of others. Jeez, people… stop taking yourselves so seriously.
White people like making everything into a club or association with rules, dues and contests for the best “whatever” the club or association is about.
Love this site — it’s just funny.
Douchebag white people seem to be pretty into your blog, so it can’t be all that scathing.
Brilliant blog….I want to be like you when I grow up! Really, I mean it.
haha, I had plans to watch a movie tonight (something i love to do) but just wasted two hours reading this entire blog.
i like it most because although i am white, i don’t fit in with most of the stereotype. which makes me feel better about myself that i’m obviously even cooler than the other white folks who think they’re super trendy cool.
you should have it printed into a book, white people would buy it in droves because its so ironic and they could read it on a train, in starbucks or by a natural body of water somewhere, and look cool.
Christ we used to be such a badass group of people, what with us fighting and enslaving the world. NOW look at us…geesh
This site is really stupid. I was expecting big things when someone told me about it, but the writing is horrible, and the topics are just plain wrong.
Get a life.
This site can dish it out but can’t take it — loser pussies.
Clever, however this should be called “Stuff LIBERAL white people like”…no?
This site is GREAT! My new Fav fer sure! Good work guys!
I’m tellin’ all my friends.
Don’t forget Buckwheat Husk Pillows,Vicodin, and Guest Soap.
1) Winter sports
2) Yelp
3) Dive bars
4) Non-chain restaurants
5) A free Tibet
6) Ron Paul
7) Bumper stickers
Bumper stickers could be parlayed into a scavenger hunt game where we look for the most references to things white people enjoy on one car (likely a Prius).
this is awesome
Snarky– Vicodin is the same as Hydrocodone/Codine. It’s a standard pain med. Nothing particularly white about it to my knowledge.
To the things mentioned by Rummy, hells yeah except for Ron Paul. It’s all about Obama. That’s just me though, not a white thing.
Let’s stop racializing everything.
White people love bogs.
Well, you might have MEANT blogs, but you are still correct, only white people don’t call them “bogs.”
Save the WETLANDS!
I mean blogs.
Non-chain restaurants and dive bars are not a stereotypical white thing. Who do you think goes to expensive bars and chain restaurants? White yuppies duh! Dive bars are a cheap place to drink, that’s their #1 virtue.
Your list is mostly describes lower class hipsters, not a white stereotype. Except for winter sports, which are awesome nonetheless.
White people also love putting charitable “Causes” ahead of the common good; i.e. Save the Whales, Amnesty to Criminal Immigrants, Claiming they have a “Black” friend, justifying the world would be better if it were all “Politically Correct’, and on and on. Truth of the matter is members of any Race can be RACIST, not “reverse discrimination”. I think it is about time as WHITE People, that we start felling guilty for a culture that is hospitable to a “VICTIM mentality” and create ourselves a NAAWP to advance our coffee loving White Race stereotype.
This website is hilarious. It reminds me why I love places like South Dakota and remote cold regions of the country;) WP
I love this blog.
Things that may or may not have been added earlier:
Sephora
Oprah
Farmers Markets
anything with Obama ‘08 emblazened on it
anything that has to do with fucking babies or kids.
Oh yeah,
Trader Joe’s
and
“Gluten Free”
White people love to pronounce the word presentation “PREE-zentation” and use the phrase “the bottom line…”
White people love air freshener.
How about “EZ Pass” transponders to show that we are too important and busy to hand 35 cents to a toll booth attendant? Total white person invention. Yet I freely admit to being white and owning one, as well as being guilty of at least 12 other call-outs on this AWESOME blog!
Things WHITEYS Despise:
1. Ghetto neighborhoods in the middle of somewhere you have to drive thru to get to where youre going.
2. “People” that cross roads S L O W L Y and think we wont hit them…..actually because “We mostly” are law abiding “Citizens” we only fantasize bout making them lazy fkrs legless.
3. Food Stamp fkrs in front of us at the grocery store with cart loads of shit for food and a Food Stamp Credit Card – WTF?
4. The idea that we all are mandated to get a passport with RFID Tags and 14 million people “Whiteys” support can’t be found.
5. The same ghetto Food Stamp fkrs getting into their personalized license plate 2007 Chevy Trailblazers with a stereo that could out blare a concert.
6. A race of 30 yo Grandparents and our financially supporting them thru our Charitable Causes Socialist Government.
WhiteyMcWhiterson
wrote “anything that has to do with fucking babies or kids.”
Agreed, white heterosexuals are out of their fucking gourds about reproduction and how special it supposedly makes the woman. What a load of rubbish! You’re some knocked up chick, remarkably similar to the last 500 trillion knocked up chicks. The guys, who know better than to tell princess she’s high-maintenance, just indulge her. Of course it must be talked about… “We made a baby!” “We’re pregnant.” here’s our overly precious, hand-made baby announcement.
White women prefer to humilaite white men by requiring them to attend vagina-creating events like baby showers.
White women pay for groceries with checks, and take eons to fill them out. What is the deal with that?
Nothing is as irritating as being stuck behind a woman who takes 4 minutes to repack her purse in the checkout aisle. unless, of course, it’s a white soccer-mom in an SUV she has no clue how to drive.
How about idiots who actually go to grocery stores with fucking stop watches and a hard on for women they know they’d never get.
hillarious site – i was in tears.
my addition to the list: garage sales!
NAAWPwrote: “How about idiots who actually go to grocery stores with fucking stop watches and a hard on for women they know they’d never get.”
I’m a gay man, ass-hat!
Jake, sorry bout your luck.
I’m white, I’ve read through your list, and I can barely tolerate any of the things you’ve listed. I despise most of them.
Stereotypes suck, even when you’re trying to be funny.
(You’re not funny.)
LMAO!!!
Whites like being associated with some place we’ve really never heard of; Caucasus somewhere near or in Russia but we dont like to fill in the Voluntary Race Questions on any type of application for fear that will actually hurt us.
Bull have you met Jake? You might like him.
nice blog …
Stuff White People Like
This blog is devoted to stuff that white people like
dont forget visit my blog too
http://www.satyasembiring.co.cc
i’m white and i can laugh at myself, this is pretty funny.
check out my blog too:
http://www.amazingmusicvideos.com
I totally fail at being a honky. Out of 68 items, I only really like 5.
Is “using the word ‘fail’” on the list?
The comments here are just eat up with fail. If you can’t tell this site is satire, then you should probably put your computer back in the box and send it back. You are too stupid for the internet.
HILARIOUS! KEEP GOING!
I’m a black woman and of the 6 blogs I read, at least 4 of them applied to me!!! I shop at farmer’s markets! I recycle! I like expensive sandwiches!!!
If these are things white people love, then I guess that makes them more dignified than any “minorities” are. I’ll take recycling, bicycles, healthy eating, exercise, and books any day over smoking crack, AIDS, mugging, robbery, vandalism, having tons of kids and not paying child support, gun violence, being an overall decadent waste of existence, etc.
(can’t wait until people respond to how “racist”, “intolerant” and “insensitive” I am when my post isn’t any more deserving of those adjectives than this whole pathetic excuse for a blog is! LOL! you all are a bunch of fucking hypocrites)
The main difference between this blog and your comment, which could be called racist, is that the blog is satire, and you’re being dead-serious. There’s a huge difference between a joke meant to make everyone laugh, and being serious and hateful. It mainly has to do with the way something is worded. Now if the blog was to say “white people are disgusting and evil people who did nothing but take things from other people” then you can consider it racist. I suggest you get an education and learn these things better. Basically, this site is like your friend joking and calling you crazy in a laughing manner. Your tone of speaking in the comment is like your rival saying you are a psychotic idiot. Hopefully, you understand what I’m saying. If not, there’s no help for you.
Couldn’t have said it any better than blargyblarg above. Whatever color, I’d rather like all this crap in this blog than the criminal culture of so many (but not all) blacks. “African American,” culture is not exactly anything to be proud of when it comes to personal responsibility. Even Jesse Jackson once said he was walking down a street in NYC late one night and heard footsteps behind him. He turned around a breathed a sigh of relief when he saw young WHITE men. Why not tackle these problems rather than make fun of things that civilized people enjoy? I try to remember that there are true “African Americans” and then there are just plain “Africans” that act like the same barbarians on the African continent.
In my opinion, your comment is very ignorant. It seems as if you see only the bad things of the African-American culture. Also, how is it you say that African Americans are a “criminal culture?” Many whites, and other races commit the same amount of crimes, if not more, than African-Americans. Saying the African-American culture is a criminal culture, is just like saying the white culture is a serial killer culture since most serial killers are white. However, I am not as ignorant and stupid as that. Also, just because Jesse Jackson said something doesn’t make it right. There are plenty of people who are racist against their own kind. For example, I have a white teacher who teaches African-American history. Every time he would read what the whites did to the slaves he’ll say “those crazy ass white people” which will make a whole bunch of people start laughing because he is white himself. So, see what I mean? It is possible to be racist against your own race. Also, what gives you the right to to say black people don’t take responsibility? This is very untrue. Every culture has someone who doesn’t take responsibility, and I have seen many people in my culture who do take responsibility for their actions. For example, I know a couple of people, who are black, who got pregnant in high school. However, they have taken responsibility by not making the same mistake, taking care of their children, and focusing on school and getting into college. So unless you have some scientific evidence to back what you are saying up, then please shut your mouth and go back to school or something. As one of the commenters said: you, blargybarg, and the other people who think this is racist, need to get your computer and put it back in the cardboard box, because you are way too damn stupid to use the Internet.
Wayne Brady.
#203…
Are you for real? Wow. You do understand that this blog is satire, right? Of course not every white person loves recycling, expensive sandwiches, and the Toyota Prius…and by the same token there are African Americans, Hispanics, Asian-Americans, etc who do. That you’d lump African Americans in their entirety into a group and call them crack-smoking, AIDS-ridden thieves is just a direct finger-point back to you that says, “ignorance.”
Good job. (<—–sarcasm)
The attempt to pigeon-hole an entire race of people will always fail to be accurate (that’s why I’m agree with #13). People are so diverse! So why don’t we just all knock it off…except when we’re going for laughs.
I don’t think #22 Anonymous understands the point of multiculturalism at all. Which, I suppose, is exactly the way it’s supposed to work.
just added you to my blogroll…
AWESOME…
More stuff white people like: complaining about people who tell them what white people like.
Hilarious! Keep it up.
Just when I thought this site was funny enough I find the comments section and all these people getting a strop on about it and lashing out because some satire hit a little too close to home for them.
Please keep the comments coming as it’s even more amusing than the actual content!
Ok granted some of them are just sad bigots but even their ire is amusing to an extent if a bit sad at the same time.
The Rolling Stones. They all love the Stones!
There is a suspicious amount of Canadian content on this blog. Very suspicious. BTW, the whitest rock band of all time was Pink Floyd. Virtually no person-of-color (should that be person-of-colour for Cashmucks?) ever listened to them or went to their shows.
We cannot add you to our blog roll for several reasons one of which is it may give up our id because we have a sense of humor and in this city that will give us away. What we have done is sent the link to people This is too funny for words.
There’s a logical fallacy at the heart of the proposition here.
While it’s obvious that nearly all middle class people are white, that doesn’t mean even that most white people are yuppies. To do so perpetuates the myth that white working class americans don’t exist, which is one that is possible to entertain when judged mainly from the hugely distorted american media output.
So the inverted snobbery which passes for humour here has a possibly unintentional but nevertheless reactionary overtone. Alright, so some of it might be just a tiny bit funny, if you read it very quickly…
to 214: wyclef jean covered “wish you were here.” you lose!
I’ve been reading a lot of your blog tonight (and commenting) and am wondering about your agenda or goal. Do you have one? Yes some “white” liberals are all talk and no action, some are just wankers, and some waste their time and energy on pointless activities because they can’t think of what else they could do. You make a lot of criticisms, some of them serious, but then will go on to criticise more effective “white” work like that for non-profit organisations which appears to me to be counter-productive.
Is this _just_ a humour blog? Is it just a racist or I-hate-liberals blog? With all the criticism you seemed to be saying that “they” should change, but change how? Or do you see yourself as simply stimulating an overdue discussion?
An alternative POV on what is usually touted as universally “good” by this social class is a very good thing in itself. I’m just bothered by the lack of consistency which may be obscuring a higher goal.
Absolutely hilarious! I immediately read through all the archives. I teach a university course on American culture (for English language learners in another country) and I’m going to use ideas from this site in my class. A wonderful cultural reference for immigrants and non-whites. Because, of course, white people like satire.
Oh yeah – and 29 of the 68 items are true for me, so I’d say based on a sample of one, they’re pretty accurate.
Wow. This is pretty close to the mark. So close that I want to be offended, but I can’t because I am still laughing at the blog (and myself). For instance, I’m the guy with the beer journal.
Keep up the funny work, and don’t ignore the recent explosion in popularity of cufflinks or the anti-smokers who coincidentally also love cigars. My prediction: smoking jackets are coming back.
Don’t forget:
- slow food
- and I second graduate degrees. “I can’t believe I made the typo — you’d never believe I have that masters in social work!”
True, there are different kinds of white people and its clear that both liberals and conservatives express whiteness in different ways.
- pretending that if they go to India to help ‘build something in a community’ they will actually be helpful
- justifying Quentin Tarantino’s obsession with the word ‘nigger’
- bitching about affirmative action
- racist statements that are meant to be ‘ironic’ or transgressive but really aren’t [see Vice Magazine]
- distracting others from their whiteness by discussing the fact that they’re gay or working class etc.
Stuff White People Like:
Blogging
To #205
Are YOU for real? Obviously you have never actually met anyone from the “African continent” if you can seriously say that they are not civilized. Also, I really do not see why #203’s comments incited such a tirade from you.
To whom it may concern,
I’m white and not a complete yuppie douche, therefore I feel left out and marginalized by this blog =(. As a white person, this makes me sad. Can you add something on, uh, like Flyin’ V-Guitars. I put a picture on my blog of a totally awesome solo. Thanks!
Haha, great blog! Yuppies are funny. They don’t know the awesomeness of V-guitars and cheap beer.
I can’t get enough of this blog. If the folks behind it are taking suggestions how’s about one on the military. It could read “White people think only idiots sign up for the military, because it’s easier to believe that than to actually learn about what’s going on. Most white people knew someone who had a cousin who had a friend in Iraq, it makes white people feel good about themselves to feel sorry for that person.” Thanks again!
I was surprised at how many of your posts apply to me, but I laughed each time they did.
I dont understand how someone can be offended by this. Stop taking yourselves so seriously people! It doesnt make all of these things wrong or bad if you can or can’t relate. Get over it!
If you hate us so much, then get out of our countries.
This site is a terrific way at pointing out the illusions white people pursue that keep them from seeing that their society is the latest falling of Rome. I’m not sure if that was the intent, but I like it.
For the record, I’m a pan-nationalist who believes white people should separate from all other races, fix their own house, and then redevelop their culture(s).
You should start by separating yourself first and see if the rest follow.
White people love to pretend that their bodies work differently from the rest of us humans’. They are horribly ashamed of burping, farting, and, dare I say it? SEX! They mentally bash themselves for needing to poop, or when they have naughty feelings that make them touch themselves.
Skinny white women love to have get-togethers where they sit around nibbling baby carrots and compare how fat they are and what the best way to starve themselves is, while in the backs of their minds they are thinking about the box of Godiva chocolates stashed at home and how they cant wait to eat them all then sit around hating themselves for how weak they are.
After the carrots are all gone, the hostess will bring her black and white picture of the child in Uganda she is sponsoring for less than a dollar a day off of the refrigerator and humbly brag about how now, thanks to her, now lives in a world with colors, somehow goes to a school that has miraculously sprung up in its village, wears little white kid clothes, gets 3 bowls of hot gruel a day, and hugs from Sally Struthers. Then all the other women verbally exalt the hostess while mentally self-flagellating themselves for being so fat and selfish and weak that they bought the $30 box of Godiva chocolates that they cant stop themselves from pigging out on later then barfing back up while the little kids in Africa sit and starve for another month thanks to her.
Okay, I understand this site is meant to be satirical, I can’t take a joke, I’m only reinforcing my whiteness, etc., etc., but actually, bulimia is not funny. Neither is painful self-hatred.
Let me guess, some of your best friends are bulimic?
Yeah, I don’t agree. My white friends are the fartiest and most willing to disclose stuff they probably should keep to themselves.
* Dive Bars
* Sofia Coppola films (but not as much as Wes Anderson films)
* Surfing
* Polaroid Cameras
* Urban Outfitters
* Coffee Table Books
* Art Museums (like MoMa, the Met, etc.)
* Ireland
White girls is some freaky bitches. They love they some black man. Last night all I had to do was go up to this white girl and say some bullshit about Obama, (white people love Obama) and she was all about it. Eyes all shinin bright and shit. She left my place a 5am, she had to meet her boyfriend for dim sum or some shit. Her hair was all stuck together where I had splashed on her face. She wants to come over again with a girlfriend of hers. White bitches can’t get enough of the big black hawk.
I think Big Black Hawk is really a white 13-year-old boy.
*Tanning salons. Serisously. Whites spent centuries being racist but hate their own paleness so much they pay to damage their skin and age prematurely.
*Outdated technology, old computers, old radios, etc…
*Antiques and antique malls
*restaurants with old junk on the walls, signs, implements, tools, etc…
*Books on tape, seriously who else but white people would drive around listening to someone else read a book?
great!
what about tiny pants, pretending to be bipolar or obsessive compulsive, and taking the tags and stickers off of their clothes (how will people know they are new?!)
This is fantastic…
Other things white people like:
Telling other people what to do with their houses: “property value” trumps all in these discussions… homeowners associations, cookie-cutter housing developments, etc.
Cocktail parties
WOW!! #235……..I feel special! Almost like Yellow Bus kind of special! Funny blog, creative, almost beguiling! Thanks for the treat, keep up the good work. I am white and it’s getting harder everyday to find stuff I like! You did it.
Guess I misspoke, too slow, I turned out to be #237!
This site is lovely. My husband and I have been laughing for an hour, drinking our coffee, reading from our mac laptops, our child-substitute dog at our feet.
Would you, perhaps, be interested in a proofreading person? I’d be happy to do that for you. And if you are totally offended by that remark… I’m sorry.
*Goth stuff…sure not all white are into that, but when was the last time you saw a black goth kid or a latino one? Maybe an Asian one who hangs out with the Goths…maybe.
*Plaid…white people invented plaid, didn’t they. Why?
astrology
small dogs
manners
therapy
purell (and other “instant hand sanitizer”)
toronto
White People in Their Natural Habitat
Thank you greatly. I have been attempting to become more white and I have found your list very helpful.
OMG…I think I’m white.
(
More Stuff White People Like: Hypothetically emigrating to Canada.
Wait… people are seriously offended by this site? Wow. White people like taking themselves way too seriously.
this site gives a very accurate portrayal of the typical white person, especially the ones here in san francisco. white people honestly annoy the shit out of me sometimes, unless they are real. this is coming from a salvadorian with caucasian spanish background who knows what’s up.
If you come to San Francisco you can find another 50 things white people like. A few examples;
Cup cakes
Tattoos
Fixed gear bikes (in addition to bikes)
Ironic mustaches (in addition to irony)
Knitting and crochet circles and stores
Hate for chain stores except for Starbucks, Pasta Pomodoro, Peet’s Coffee, Ben and Jerry stores.
HAHAHA!
White people LOVE specialty ice cream. Especially the ones in the “small” round lid containers….ie… Ben and Jerry’s and Haag.
Plus, I worked at a small “local” (also a white attention-getter) custard store. The customers who frequented?….white people. and I worked there for more than six months.
This is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time. Keep up the good work!
White people love it when black people kill black people. As long as blacks are killin each other, whites think they safe. Just wait whitey,,,one day, you all gonna get your top blown off.
White people have too much time on their hands
I am in total agreement with the posts above…the author of this blog is ASIAN.
This blog reeks of
“Asian American (I am almost 99% it is Korean-American) Guy who realizes that the Fixed Action Patters of Upper Middle Class, Urban, Liberal White People” is the standard target and pinncale lifestyle to which almost all wealthy and educated people in America strive….and is a bit peeved at it so decides to poke fun of it in a light, but still somewhat derisive manner”
For all of you who mistakenly believe that the author is black or hispanic, I quote the famous SNL skit: “Nigga Please!”
Although Black or hispanic people poke fun at and find much of white culture quirky and hilarious, they do not write blogs which dive so deep into showcasing white culture and critique in a way that exudes insecurity or a vent-up “grudge” as this one does. You can see that that none of the items in this blog are really far from fact. Alot of the items of in the list do indeed apply to a very large section of white population in America. The author does not really lie or distort reality. However, that’s just it. Only Asians find the reality of white culture to be bothersome to their pre-programmed prejudices of what is superior. Hispanics and blacks would be more likely to make up and totally distort the reality of white culture and make jokes about it and leave it at that since they really don’t care what white people do as long as it doesn’t infringe upon their enjoyment of life. In other words, Hispanics and blacks are perfectly fine with the whites wanting to recycle, drive Priuses, live by the water, shop at Whole Foods or what not because if they were making as much money or obtaining the same level of financial comfort, many black and Hispanics would probably want to do the same thing too. Or, they would choose not to, but it doesn’t bother them. Simply put, black and hispanics are comfortable being themselves and with white people being different. They really don’t have any dreams or illusions of black or hispanic culture dominating the “stuff that white people like culture” and really don’t get annoyed that liberal, urban white culture is what it is.
However, with Asians, it is a completely different story. Asians have this strange underlying “grudge” or I should say, “inferiority complex” with any culture or people that are different from themselves but hold a dominance in the society in which both live. Thus, this reality does not fit well with the natural competitive and insecure nature that personififes so much of the Asian immigrant culture in the western world. Unlike black and hispanics, the Asian population in western countries has already reached the same level of economic/financial success that white people hold, and in Asian culture, there is no greater feeling of enjoyment than seeing yourself becoming the dominant power. Thus, because Asians share pretty much the same socio-economic status as whites, they are much aware and exposed to white, urban, liberal blue-state culture since they probably work alongside these types of white people and probably have gone to the same wealthy, high ranked, hippie universities full of white people that this blog ridicules. Not too many black and hispanics have reached this position to be so close and neck to neck with the white population that is the target of this blog. That is the diference.
Thus, Asians see that in this country (USA) or whichever country in which Asians and whites are neck to neck, that despite sharing almost the same economic status with that of the white population, the standard for hipness, wealth, and whatever is considered “cool”, fashionable or trendy is basically “stuff that urban, progressively-minded white people like”…not stuff that “rich, successful, science/engineering background-minded Asian people like.” This reality conflicts and does not bode well with what these Asians have believed throughout their entire lives from birth which is that “Our Asian culture is superior to any caucasian culture because our race is the most intelligent and most beautiful in the world”. It is a commonly known fact that Asian culture in the form of parents, schools, media drill this message of racial superiority into their heads from birth. Thus, when these kids grow up and actually see that reality of the world is totally different from what their masters in their little Asian enclave of racial superiority has told them, they get confused, jealous and spiteful to the point where they need to find tribal comfort in congregating with other Asians and finding humor in telling each other how funny it is that white people’s culture is so different from theirs.
The irony is, however, that in secret or behind closed door amonst themselves, alot of Asians actually yearn for the same things found on this list…especially living by the water or shopping at high end groceries. However, they are just irritated that they came from a culture in which their families could not afford to or did not give a rat’s ass about the environment, recycling, helping poor people in third world countries, eating organic food, helping causes, going snowboarding, renovating a house, throwing dinner parties, travelling to exotic locales, etc., Granted it is not their fault because as immigrants to a new country, their parents did not have the time nor luxury of doing these things because they were too busy trying to make money or push their kids at school to learn Calculus by age 10.
Instead, these Asian kids grew up seeing TV shows from their motherland countries and their families living a different culture: obessing about money, buying expensive designer name brand goods with the label on the front to show off (Gucci, Guess, Dolce Gabanna, etc.), smoking cigarettes in front of their girlfriends, driving nothing other than Mercedes Benz and BMWs, listening to cheezy ballad or R&B based pop music, striving to be a rich doctor, never thinking about travelling to third world countries (only places where they want to travel is K-town in LA, NYC, or anywhere which is considered “fashionable”), etc. Becuase they grew up seeing this type of lifestyle and culture as what is cool and what every normal person strives to acheive, they are heartbroken and angry when they realize that noone in upper class America considers this type of lifestyle to be “cool” or reflecting of high class or wealth. Thus, you get the grudge and blogs like this.
Now of course, before anyone jumps on my back, I know I did ALOT of racial stereotyping and applied a huge range of broad labels to Asians in general. However, my response to that is, “I really don’t care.” Why? Because I can. The reason is that although I am not a member of this group, I spent almost all of my 34 years growing up surrounded by Asian Americans with almost 70% of my childhood friends being Asian, going to school with them side by side, eating dinner and spending weekends upon weekends at their houses with their families, and just knowing their culture inside out. I can even speak Mandarin and Korean even though I am a white boy. Now, I will say that almost half of my close friends now are Asian. However, none of these people subscribe or are victims to the mental disease of insecurity and inferiority complex which I described above. In fact, these guys are “whiter” than me in so many ways and unlike the Asians which I describe above, they really don’t care that “white culture” is different from what they grew up with and really don’t care that it is the dominant standard for what is considered trendy and characteristic of wealth and high-class. In other words, they are absolutely comfortable with themselves. Thus, I want to say that NOT ALL ASIANS ARE LIKE WHAT I DESCRIBE ABOVE.
However, I would like point out three points in the list of this blog that are dead giveaways that the author is Asian and not black or hispanice. Here they are:
#68 Divorce
- Please. I think more blacks or hispanics get divorced than whites. No black or hispanic would be foolish to cite this as something characteristic of being something only a white person would do. However, I can’t even count how many times I have heard the endless adage from Asians saying how terrible and inferior white American culture is because the divorce rate is so high in this country. They insist that Asian culture is that of higher morals because divorce is uncommon. Well, I guess it would be that way since the only other alternative for an Asian women would be to become a prostitute and outcasted by society for the rest of her life since a divorced woman has as much value as a slab of T-bone steak 10 days past the expiration date. No wonder you see so many loveless Asian couples who stay together just for superficial face value while the husband goes and screws whores at the hostess bar on a weekly basis while the wife flies to Europe or Thailand with her girlfriends for a romp in the sack with locals. Meanwhile, the kids grow up seeing such a screwed up household and become permanently scarred for life so they end up jaded, angry, and insecure. Thus, many of them end up writing blogs like this. Oh well, but according to them, this type of relationship is waaaay better than divorce.
#47 Art Degrees
- Again, while in university, I was astounded by the number of Asian students who told me how they hated courses in English lit, history, or any of the humanities courses which required them to write. Thus, it’s not surprising that I found the opportunity to make alot of good money from Asian high school kids who would pay me to write their college application essays since they had no writing skills whatsoever to complement their 800 math SAT scores. I’m not talking about international students either but rather Asian-Americans. It’s strange that even with the privledge of having grown up in an English speaking educational system, so many Asians have difficulty in expressing themselves outside of number or equations. I think this stems from the fact that they are conditioned within their families to think that the only respectable disciplines or professions are ones that use science and math. Any other academic discipline such as arts and the humanities is for the inferior white race. Thus, this becomes ingrained in their heads. However, the caveat is that when it comes time to apply to Harvard or Princeton, they realize that their high grades in math/science and 800 math SAT scores don’t mean jack when they also carry poor grades in English or low verbal SAT scores. I guess that’s where I come in. In any case, many an Asian student who was denied his/her chance at Harvard, Stanford or Yale because of their weakness in the arts or humanities has expressed to me their utmost hatred in all of their high school English teachers, college essays, etc and vow that they would like to exterminate any person who majors in such disciplines and gets a better paying job (probably a lawyer) than themselves. Dead giveaway. Blacks and Hispanics don’t give a shit about who majors in what.
#42 Sushi and #58 Japan
- Actually, these two may be more of a confirmation that the blog writer is definitely NOT Japanese but most likely Korean or Chinese American. However, that in itself serves as a strengthening evidence that the writer is definitely Asian and not hispanic or black because there is no way in hell that a black and hispanic would know or even care to subdivide the Asian fetish that alot of white people have. To black and hispanics, a white person fawning over anything Japanese is just an “Asian fetish.” However, to a Korean or Chinese person, a white person fawning over anything Japanese is just one more cherry on the top of the pudding of insult to their own culture which they believe to be superior to that of Japan’s. To Korean-Americans and Chinese-Americans, Japanese are pretty much at the same level as white people are in terms of targets of jealousy, insecurity, disdain and their grudge. I really don’t think any black or hispanic would give a frog’s fat ass whether or not white people preferred Japanese culture/food to that of Koreans or Chinese but for the Koreans and Chinese, it’s just makes them squirm even more with rage and jealous grudge. Spend any time with a Korean or Chinese and they will tell you that the thing that they hate more than Japan itself is the fac t that Japan enjoys a very popular image throughout the first world and is considered “cool” and “hip” among wealthy, urban, intelligent whites. They really don’t like it that kimchi, soju, Korean soap operas, turtle boats, and Panda express do not conjure up the same image of elegance and chicness that sushi, “Lost In Translation”, samurai and sake do for white people. Definitely, it would not be on this list if it was a non-Asian.
For a better idea of what I am talking about, look at the website below. It’s chock full of Asian American males who are venting their anger and frustration at being the little man on the totem pole in American society. Their posts describe their laments but also their dreams and fantasies of finally being able to turn into the second Ming Emperior who will destroy all white males and reestablish themselves as the ultimate alpha males in society. It’s a good laugh.
http://www.thefighting44s.com/
Wow. This is just too stupid. First off, go check out the author of the book. It’s not a secret. Second of all, even if the blog was written by an Asian, you’ve made a lot of arrogant, broad reaching, baseless comments about Asians in general and this guy in particular. You’ve also made quite a few of those same smartass comments about Blacks and Hispanics. How DO you find the time to know what is going on in EVERYONES’ heads!?
I personally think that this blog was misnamed and should be called “What 20-somethings w/ degrees in Liberal Arts Like”; I go to school in a major college town / at a big university, and most of these hit home, regardless of race, for artsy / hipster students. On the issue of race, I really don’t understand why EVERYONE is so mad! Race is an illusion that’s meant to supercede what scientists and anthropolgists have proven for a long time now; the only difference between you and this guy is the adaptations that your ancestors made to the environments you were plunked down in. I’m guessing that since you’ve got it out against engineers / mathies (which is a shame cuz we’re really not that bad B-) ), you’re probably someone who works in the liberal arts. If so, how could you miss your anthro lessons? People are blank sheets; canvases onto which the places that they lived splashed colour (skin tone), and brushstrokes (things like body types and facial features). And what about the infinite realities that could present themselves? The author of this blog could just as easily have been your kid sister.
Last off, a lot of students who are first or second generation are pressured by their parents to be a lot of things. But think of it this way. Your family is new to a country, and they don’t have the longevity to be able to use things like networking or hobnobbing to land a job. A lot of immigrant parents just want to ensure their children have job security so they can thrive in an alien country and take care of their families later on (the latter is a big thing in other cultures). Having jobs in science, technology and medicine, where what you know is generally valued over who you know helps. Also, it’s true that many American-born students tend to shy away from the physical sciences and engineering, so that can futher provide these families with areas to go into. I think that if you took away whatever hyperdefensive walls you’d built up towards these kids that you’re assisting (whom I feel sorry for if you have this much venom against them), you’d be able to see that.
I didn’t read this because WTF?
brilliant. and all of you need to read “Food Court Druids, Cherohonkees and Other Creatures Unique to the Republic” for additional research.
This site is very funny, and rather observant as well. However, I can’t get past the horrible grammar. Edit edit edit!
Perhaps that can be your next entry… white people really love proper grammar.
What about mid-century modern design? (Or has this been covered under “Vintage” or “Architecture”? I have not read these entries yet.)
Also: self-help, marriage retreats, health spas, fresh herbs; preferably grown in your garden or windowsill. Romanticizing another culture to death, i.e., French or European (especially Mediterranean) ways of life.
Was Bob Marley on the list? White people love Bob Marley.
and ham. White people love ham.
Tom Sawyer (253) is spot on…I was sold by his ability to demonstrate that Japan haters are generally either other asians or whites.
At first I thought this was written by a white cuz it so white. But now I see the light. Tom Sawyer be right, yellow doll carve whitey up like a knife. Meanwhile I tappin yo yellow cab wife…all night. oh yeah oh yeah all right….Nigga Please!!!!
Ham is a little declasse. Expensive sausage is better.
I especially like this site for giving me an opportunity to really laugh at myself, especially the piece on recycling. Ouch! But I think the content isn’t really about “white people” as much as about “white middle class people” and “white liberals”. After all, not all white people care about recycling or homeopathic medicine, and it’s the middle classes who think they know what is best for poor people, some of whom are also white (gasp!) as evidenced by terms such as “white trash”.
You guys need to step up your White People studies – the authors of this blog are obviously as white as the Orbitz gum lady’s teeth
i like this site.
something that always fascinates me is how so many (middle-to-upper-class, non-immigrant) white people in the west – and especially in America – don’t recognize their race and their culture. i think this blog points out how non-’ethnic’ whites in the west do have a culture. and that it’s observable.
i’m someone who tries to do some things ‘right’ with respect to how i treat others and my environment (organic, handmade, free trade, sustainable), i’m getting my doctorate, i own cats, and i wear handmade jewelry from all over the world, so i definitely fall into a ‘white’ culture. i also played co-ed sports at one point. i’ve recognized my own whiteness for a long time, though, and i think it’s good to be able to laugh at it. learn, change, learn, laugh.
even this comment is super duper white. i don’t know if you have this up yet, but #____ : writing seemingly self-aware comments about one’s own whiteness. that’s VERY white.
Wow man is this site a joke? Because if liking culture and personal growth is for whites only I’m glad that genetic randomness threw me in the cool category.
Because being white is such a bad bad thing.
This is awesome.
White people love to vote for Obama so that they can seem multicultural and open-minded.
It’s funny because it’s true.
I’m guessing this site is written by an asian guy who had to live with white roommates and inevitably learned every predictable thing they do. (It’s too insightful for a white person)
Must be our lack of insight that has helped us make 99% of the advancements in everything.
“anything that has to do with fucking babies or kids”
peadophelia is for whites only?
hey Bart that is a gross distortion
asians invented paper, printing, noodles (pasta) and gunpowder, just to list things off the top of my head…that said I’m in agreement that it’s probably an asian writing this. the typos are kind of a giveaway too. it’s mildly funny but too general and repetitive (how many times do they say “white people can’t get enough of that stuff”?) sounds more like someone with an axe to grind. If you want something way funnier, offensive but not racist check out http://maddox.xmission.com/ one of my fav sites of all time.
And so deeply, deeply inaccurate. Arabs avoided the Dark Ages deftly sprinting ahead in astronomy/physics/literature, while most of Europe sat around and picked their asses until enough racist sentiment was decanted into trying to beat the crap out of Islam.
White people did a pretty good job destroying the Middle East this time around too. I say this as someone who normally loves Britain, but boy, if there is one thing we can pin on the Limeys, its the coming apocalypse.
I’m no fan of Japan (at all) but when you look way back kickassery of all stripes was born in the classical East–as in, barely east at all, including north Africa–and traveled West, not vice versa. Caucasians are descendants of barbarian clans that did in fact, have a certain knack for taking over their betters. XOXO!
Splitting historical hairs since 2008! Now what’s the deaal with Ovaltine?
I’m the whitest guy I know and I don’t get it.
i must not be white i hate every thing on here lol
Please, PLEASE add JOGGING and PILATES
yo dude do one on y white people all go healthy and start acting faggy about it some my white friends started doin that shit and its fuckin faggy, ya know eating salads and jogging and shit…and they start to get scared of burgers and chicken
If loving David Sedaris is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.
Where’s items #64 and 65?
After reading this blog, I have found more evidence that I am not really Asian. In fact- I am a white guy with slanty eyes. Not sure if I should be rejoicing or if I should shoot myself.
Go bananas!
equal opportunity:
http://www.stuffblackpeoplelove.com
This is so brillant and true.
White also love blue grass and folk music. Whites love acustic music that makes everyone else sleepy. The added benefit is that such music isn’t for dancing to (unless you are trained performance artist), so the rythmnless white people can just sit there and maybe sway a little while drinking micro-brewed beer or some “unique” tea that tastes like air freshner.
Love it. Proof that white people kick ass. Actually everyone kicks ass, but you got a few of them wrong.
Let’s see….2,3,4,5,6,8,10,14,16,17,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,28,29,30,31,32,33,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,45,46,47,48,50,55,56,57,63,68.
A few comments:
62: If poor people knew what was best for them, they wouldn’t be poor.
56:Lawyers Suck, You like lawyers, Not Us. Stop making us look bad, we can do that Ourselves.
55: And you owe me a great big apology for this one.
30:Wrigley sucks. If it didn’t suck, the teams that played there would win more often.
26: Manhattan Sucks. The fact that you can even make that joke proves your whiter than I am, and I’m damn near Opaque.
16: only some of us. sounds like yer Just jealous!
8: Barack is whiter than I am, and 100 times more full of Sh*t than I am.
1. HELL YEAH!
Fun Stuff! And Don’t Forget what white people like most!
YOU!
Later
Love it. Proof that white people kick ass. Actually everyone kicks ass, but you got a few of them wrong.
Let’s see….2,3,4,5,6,8,10,14,16
,17,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,28,29,30,31
,32,33,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,45,46,
47,48,50,55,56,57,63,68.
A few comments:
62: If poor people knew what was best for them, they wouldn’t be poor.
56:Lawyers Suck, You like lawyers, Not Us. Stop making us look bad, we can do that Ourselves.
55: And you owe me a great big apology for this one.
30:Wrigley sucks. If it didn’t suck, the teams that played there would win more often.
26: Manhattan Sucks. The fact that you can even make that joke proves your whiter than I am, and I’m damn near Opaque.
16: only some of us. sounds like yer Just jealous!
8: Barack is whiter than I am, and 100 times more full of Sh*t than I am.
1. HELL YEAH!
Fun Stuff! And Don’t Forget what white people like most!
YOU!
Later
Re submitting because some numbers Got cut off.
I’m just White Like that!
Fantastic list.
Feeling uncomfortable is so funny! I love it. This isn’t just the last blog I read that laughs at white people — it’s my FAVORITE blog and I will check back to read it often!
Remember, white people: you are completely unique in every way.
reposted from elsewhere:
Whiteness is all about being in control of your life and comfortable, all while having lots of fun. Yay!
(*^_^*)
For my modern journalist class we had to look up websites that we deemed to be improper (to crack down upon in the school news letter). I put down this website because your information, though it is factual, points out racial flaws. Saying things like this is just like going up to a crowd of people (all of different ethnicities and back rounds) and saying, “hispanic people make up most gangs in america.” the comment is rude and unjust.
Also this website came up first when I looked up ‘white people’ on rushmore drive, which is a predominantly a black search engine. It disgusts me just to think about the fact that black people and others like reading a website that teases a culture. You are all adults and yet you are acting like irresponsible teenagers. You all know better then to make fun of people because their skin is a different color then yours or they do things differently then you, have you not learned any thing from kindergarden. Shame on all of you, even the white people that say that this okay.
Great satire.
I am mixed race (Puerto Rican) and find that I like more than a handful of this list. As my black husband would say
” that’s your white side”!
May I add: Breastfeeding
and : Wearing summer clothes in winter weather
[...] book. Though it probably makes me a prime target for these people. ;-P (I agree with Vanessa, the site should be called “Stuff Yuppies [...]
I love it. I feel like I’m laughing at other people, then realize that I like about 70% of the things posted so far. Love my marathons.
Obviously Tom Sawyer did not have his morning cup of coffee.
This blog is awesome. Why? Simple rules of physics apply here: every action has an equal and opposite reaction. White expats in other countries make their little blogs trashing the native culture and people all the time. So how does it feel to have a little taste of your own medicine? Oh yeah, it sucks doesn’t it?
You are a genius! Thanks for the laughs.
Brie Cheese. Blogging. Ebay. Candles. Book Collections. Lifestyle Drugs. Blackberrys. Houseplants. Anthony Bourdain. Online Banking.
More later.
Forgot these —
White people love
a) Asian people who act white.
b) living in gentrified Ghetto’s, boasting about it at parties uptown, then fearing for their lives as they walk home.
This blog needs to be retitled, “What white liberals like…”
awesome. to the douchebags who think your blog is negative, racist, or in any other way inappropriate or harmful:
do your own kids even like you?
amen.
Hehehe…obviously, I must have touched a nerve in some Asian boys, eh LDW?
Guess it hits too close to home.
apparently having a sense of humor isn’t something white people like! although it would clearly be labeled a ‘hate site’ if this were “stuff asian people like”, “stuff black people like”, etc…
also, to the 30% of the white people who are so indignant about this blog (e.g. NAAWP, Dee, etc.) and say things like “get out of our countries”, i have one message.
get out of our country. (i’m assuming it’s a racist american, not brit, aussie, or other white-majority nation). the usa isn’t only for white people, even if the political system kind of operates in that way.
white people don’t like racists. so fuck off.
whit meat. white people love white meat. asian people? we love dark meat. greasier and fattier and juicier. black people? dark meat. for the same reason. latino’s? same. everybody loves dark meat except white people.
I think that another thing we could add to the list is that bloggs are for white people. Oh wait! Great site!
This site needs to be added to its own list now.
I take it that this is an American blog.
To me, as a European (German born and bred with a partly English socialisation) it looks more like “Stuff The Middle Classes Like”.
However, great blog! Keep up the good work and I will blogroll it.
stuff black people like:
screaming in movie theatres
hummus
Like many of you’r readers, I am in fact white, and found this sight to be an accurate reflection of things I like.
Morever, I’d like to thank you for your list and explanations, as being white, I found new things that I didn’t even know I liked… Take expensive sandwiches, for example – I never thought about them much before, but now I just can’t get them out of my mind!!!!
I love expensive sandwiches.
Thanks again
-White guy
I love this site SO VERY MUCH!
I must blog and promote it!
For those saying that this is about “liberals” and not whites: I’d argue that the only reason white people from poor, rural areas do not act exactly like how whites are depicted on this site is because of financial and economic issues.
If you gave some poor, white trash, trailer park-dwelling rube a six-figure salary and a condo in Orange county, he’d turn into this kind of white person within a few weeks.
Poor white people can’t afford to be white correctly. Deep in the id of every conservative redneck is a repressed craving for coffee, Obama, and expensive sandwiches.
I think it’s funny that Tom Sawyer has Asian friends (supposedly). White people are so cute when they think they know everything.
“White people love being the expert on YOUR culture” Thanks for proving his point buddy LOL
I like how white people are getting upset and trying to say, “No! This is about white yuppies!” or “White Democrats!” or “White Liberals!” or “White Americans!” or “White Middle Class!”
Totally missing the point, white people…. White people really aren’t used to this. IT’S GREAT!
This is a very insightful work. Thanks for keeping it clean and positive: the site has been handled with care. Keep up the good work. A few people just might learn something new.
White people like watching non whites play sports that whites are no good at. Since they cannot compete intellectually, black people like beating whites at sports, even lame ones like golf. If golf hadn’t been a whites only sport for decades, blacks would have no interest in it. And since Asian cannot compete creatively, Asians like making fun of the white culture they envy.
How about the WTA Tour? Hot European women with sexy names like Tatiana and Gisela entertaining us in a sport that has been gentrified since its origins in the court of Queen Elizabeth. However, white people are generally not big fans of the Williams sisters, unless they are afraid of appearing racist.
Also, squash — is there a whiter sport in the US & Canada? Plus, the New York Times says it helps kids get into Harvard, so it must be true.
Pilates, online shopping, Tom Brady, Esquire magazine, poetry readings, & this white person LOVES shark week on the Discovery Channel. For what that’s worth.
I love this site! I love the comments even more. To all my white brothers and sisters who are trashing this site, lighten up! It’s called humor, we deserve to get ripped on every once and a while. A couple of other things that white people love: Starbucks, Michael Chabon and Crosby Stills Nash!
“I like how white people are getting upset and trying to say, “No! This is about white yuppies!” or “White Democrats!” or “White Liberals!” or “White Americans!” or “White Middle Class!””
I am one of those whites who said that this seems to be more about class than about race.
However, I was not upset.
What I was saying was that the definition of “white” used here is largely American and would, in other Western countries, be more associated with middle classness rather than with “white”.
Any member of the English upper classes would puke his guts out at the preferences labelled as “white” here. NQOCD – Not quite our class, dear!
As I said before, that doesn’t make this blog any less accurate or entertaining.
This blog is especially funny, once I figured out that you’re actually this geeky little white dude…
http://www.flickr.com/photos/pancakejess/2142023992/
I am a non white, majority african-american, U.S. citizen and I deem this site, officially NON-Racist.
And based upon the items listed herein, I feel I must confess. It appears I am less ‘black’ than I had originally assumed.
stop giving away our secrets!!!!
Bon Jovi
Pop culture
The Gap, J Crew, Banana Republic, Laura Ashley, Eddie Bauer, Abercrombie & Fitch, and so on…
Bottled water from foreign and exotic places
Natural Childbirth
INSISANT about nursing in public (totally uncovered)
Golf
Pretending they are natural blondes (white American women). By the way, you don’t fool anyone when your lashes and eyebrows are BROWN. Don’t even get me started about your damn roots. If you’re going to do it, do it right (and keep it up).
Bono
Mid-life crisis’
hmmm….
Don’t forget about acting black. Most white people can’t act white around other races.
where are the sister sites? stuffblackpeoplelike, stuffchinesepeoplelike, stuffindianslike, stuffirishpeoplelike, etc.
I’ll chime in on the class issue. But count me among those who think this list is hilarious. So if you wanted a few more downmarket faves for the white folk, you might add:
NASCAR (duh)
Brunch Buffets
Flea Markets
Gun Shows
Huge Propane Grills
Casseroles Made with Cambell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup
…all are big where I’m from.
Two that are far more class ambiguous these days:
Seeing the Country in a Recreational Vehicle
Harley Davidson Motorcycles
The author of this blog is a douchebag.
“where are the sister sites? stuffblackpeoplelike, stuffchinesepeoplelike, stuffindianslike, stuffirishpeoplelike, etc.”
yeah, I’d like to see those.. what’s good for the goose… and all.
I find most of this stuff kind of pedestrian, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
I’m surprised i didn’t see anything about techno. i’m white and i love techno or electronica and any creative hybrid of styles.
also Avant Guard and experimental sounds and tape music. it makes you feel intellectual even though its just terrible piss vomit noise.
3 things about this Blog:
1) I confuses liberals with white people. (For example, most of these qualities are found equally in Asian liberals).
2) It reeks of California race relations.
3) It is written by a Bourgeious “non-white” person who feels edgy now.
I meant to say “It confuses liberals with white people.”
Not “I confuse liberals with white people.”
@billhd
“I’ll chime in on the class issue. But count me among those who think this list is hilarious. So if you wanted a few more downmarket faves for the white folk, you might add:
NASCAR (duh)
Brunch Buffets
Flea Markets
Gun Shows
Huge Propane Grills
Casseroles Made with Cambell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup
…all are big where I’m from.
Two that are far more class ambiguous these days:
Seeing the Country in a Recreational Vehicle
Harley Davidson Motorcycles”
I was just about to respond on this note. I think white people from the south have been overlooked in this scientific experiment.
if this blog is intended as humor, it’s not funny. if it’s intended seriously, it’s racist. anybody who would laugh at this is ill, and anybody who would believe it is a bigoted idiot.
as an experiment, why don’t you set up those other blogs as others suggested (“stuffblackpeoplelike, stuffchinesepeoplelike, stuffindianslike, stuffirishpeoplelike, etc.”), fill it with the same ++untrue++ drivel (like “watermelon & welfare” for blacks, “beans & lowriders” for hispanics, etc.) and see how quick you get lynched by the naacp, lulac, etc.?
The picture is brilliant. I’m copying it for further use.
The problem with irony, though, is that it reaches the “converted” and few others.
You left out:
1. Laughing at ourselves
2. Figuring out what is and isn’t socially acceptable as racism (IE if it is acceptable for two black guys to say “my nigga,” is it acceptable of a white person as well?)
Dave Eggers
David Byrne
Bruce Springsteen(due to Arcade Fire approval)
Vinyl LPs and 45s
Stores that sell $300 pink beaded cardigans, clutches, and/or ballet flats.
Naming their daughter Maya (Buddhist, Latina, and Angelou)
Naming their son Jackson (Michael, Andrew, and Pollack?)
I would like to point out that Garrison Keillor’s entire career has been built on things white people like and while white people may not like him, I believe he deserves some credit here, much as white people might not like it. In fact, if there were a stuff white people don’t like site, Keillor would be right up there, but below television, which I believe is first.
P.S. Are there going to be fewer postings now that the writers strike is over?
More accurate would be “white people who care what nonwhite people think of them” – but I love love love that you’ve just lumped all white people into this category. Don’t change a thing.
I have thought this over and come to the conclusion that stuff white people like is mainly about marketing and has little or nothing to do with race.
That said:
All things HBO except maybe G-String Divas and boxing
New rituals (e.g. gay weddings)
Dogs
Cats
It’s all about status. To hang with a certain crowd or to social climb, you have to adopt, or pretend to, certain opinions and attitudes:
be sympathetic and condecending to minorities but live nowhere near them
condemn mutinational corporations but make sure you invest in them
never mention high rates of homosexual pedophilia
look down on working-class white people
etc.
Just like coming from the “right” family in Victorian England
Vanessa was right – way, way back. It is indeed amusing to collect lists of items and experiences very dear to the “monied imagination”, but this has far less to do with race and much more to do with class. Stuff “yuppies” like, or more aptly, “Stuff Yuppies Need” would be a more accurate though much less “sexy” title.
Love the site and you have me pegged on many of them. For the naysayers, they are just trying to be politically correct but deep down know how transparent they really are. If white people love irony and satire so much, why the hate for your postings?
I have accepted that I am a 33 year old yuppie who loves wine and indie rock and I am fine with it.
A few suggestions would be the love of sandals dating back to the 90s with Birkenstocks, up thru Teva and Keen and now the latest craze Crocks.
Another one would be flavored bottled water, I don’t get it but my wife loves the stuff.
after reading my comment back, i realized that i used the word “love” 5x that could be another posting…….
Awesome website. I definitely fit into a bunch of these categories, and the ones I don’t, I know other white people who do very well. Very funny. If only it weren’t so true…
Also, suggestion in case someone hasn’t mentioned it yet, if someone has, ignore:
Really Strange/Dumb Kids Names and/or Spelling a Common Name in a Weird Way
(i.e. Orangello, Sovereign, Anjelah, etc.)
What a wonderful idea for a blog… Gee, I hope people will read this! LOL! Well done!
I want to thank you for this Blog…I forgot what I like anymore! I am Blonde
The Sauna
THREE WOMEN – ONE GERMAN, ONE JAPANESE AND A HILLBILLY – WERE SITTING
NAKED IN A SAUNA.
SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE GERMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND
THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. “THAT WAS MY
PAGER,” SHE SAID. “I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM.”
A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE JAPANESE WOMEN LIFTED HER PALM
TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, “THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE,
I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND.”
THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FELT DECIDEDLY LOW TECH. NOT TO BE OUTDONE, SHE
DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF
THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET
PAPER HANGING FROM HER BEHIND. THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND
STARED AT HER.
THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FINALLY SAID, “WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT. I’M
GETTIN’ A FAX.”
Perhaps white leftie snobs had it coming.
I mean, I don’t think the author actually believes that to be an uneducated, untraveled, uncultured couch potato is a noble thing to which we should all aspire. What this blog wants to be is a satire of rich white self-righteousness (a better example is the song Holiday in Cambodia by the Dead Kennedys) but somewhere along the way the point got obscured by the author’s pettiness.
There are some hilarious, if a little obvious, points here (ie. Veganism, Yoga) but there is also a current of vindictiveness or envy running through this blog, and this not only takes away from the humor, at times it makes the author seem a petty little shit with some scores to settle. His schtick is stereotyping a small segment of white society (in most cases) and attributing their values to us all. Look, I can do that too:
Things Muslims like: Hezbollah, blowing people up, beating women, getting enraged about cartoons
Things Black people like: welfare, guns, slanging drugs, being bad fathers
Things Hispanic people like: border-jumping, welfare, parking cars on their front yards
See, I can be a petty and intolerant dipshit as well. It’s easy. Perhaps I should start a blog. Seems the IQ requirement is nice and low…
I’ve got to say, this site is funny.
What is even better are the people who find the site offensive, claiming that things like this are the cause of racial tension. When in reality if we could all laugh at ourselves and would throw this PC shit down the toilet, it would ease these “racial tensions” much more.
If people would stop taking things – especially obviously satirical things – so personally and to heart, what a world of good that would do.
jmo
This site is hilarious. Don’t forget: freeing tibet, thinking globally and day spas!
[...] out the comments on the about page to get a sense of how quickly or vehemently people can get bent out of shape about race. [...]
I think you need to be a little more transparent about the fact that this website is created by a white guy. Shouldn’t you change all your third person pronouns to first person plural?
Dont forget: “blogs, irony and middle class introspection”
I agree with the comment that this is more “what white yuppies like”. Still funny though!
haha, omg, i love this.
THIS IS FIERCE.
& to all of the critiquers and whatever, omg, the sites’ just a joke. so stop taking everything so seriously. ♥
I thought I was white, but apprently I’m not !
Oh and Matt @339, you are a wanker
White people also like french fries, sushi, dim sum, frozen peaches and blueberries, Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food frozen yogurt, Gossip Girl, Gilmore Girls, Wonder Years, cuteness, nyanko, Japan, Japanese things, SUSHI, Hide sushi, scallops, Coach boots, mary janes, collegiate style, Seattle, London, minis, photos, Cbus!, Ohio State, Ohio style pizza, mis chicas, linebackers, London, hobnobs, kaiten sushi, waffles, pancakes, detail, fur rugs, our bed, Frank, Dex and Murphy, IKEA, pop music, pop rock, Girls Aloud, Brit pop, Anthropologie, Julieanne Moore’s coloring, Elle, Lost in Translation, Back to the Beach, scratch and sniff, Marshall, Justice, Coffee Crisp—erable!, cookbooks with pictures, our Waring Pro, Flickr, GoFugYourself, being critical of others) (and themselves), Pie n Burger, In n Out, Thurman Cafe, Hillbilly Hot Dogs, egg press cards, fancy wrapping paper, baking, baking with friends, eating baked goods, soft lighting, Harrod’s Food Halls, sunshine, snow, Christmas, Christmas bush (and tree), Christmas music, fall, college football, Kirk, blue, jeans, rainbow flip flops, Laguna Beach (seasons 1 & 2 only), Colbert Report, Food Network, shows about property, Athens, GA, beer in a boot, Nikon D40x, Air Canada first class, first world countries, G8, pupusas,Taco Bell, and riverdalepalmtrees.wordpress.com;
Can we discuss how white people seem fascinated by the far East? Yoga, Tai Chi, silly books like Eat, Pray, Love, etc. White people are so cute with their little trends, aren’t they?
I love this blog, keep up the good work!
I just wish it wasn’t so popular so you didn’t have to scroll so far down to get to the latest comments.
You need to add how white people love to be prescribed, Anti-depressant medications.
I salute your awesomeness, dude or dudette.
i like clander’s stuff better than mylosh’s. it’s funnier and more on point, and some how not bitter-sounding. my favorites are the entries on wine and “gifted” kids.
White people like accusing other white people of being racist.
: )
Although I am African American, I am a white girl according to the likes in this blog. Funny.
Matt you are missing the point. I don’t see much of what is written here is likely to be perceived as negative characteristics, just quirky observations. However it is interesting you couldn’t find any funny quirky observations of others;”Things Muslims like: Hezbollah, blowing people up, beating women, getting enraged about cartoons
Things Black people like: welfare, guns, slanging drugs, being bad fathers
Things Hispanic people like: border-jumping, welfare, parking cars on their front yards
See, I can be a petty and intolerant dipshit as well. ”
I see your point but you are not comparing like issues. Kinda sad you only see the negatives in others.
So far I have not had the urge to adopt an African orphan (or a throwaway Asian daughter, can’t believe those people ) – you gotta stay out of Starbucks, I think they pipe that shyt in subliminally. “adopt a black orphan, vote for Obama, support the troops (means support war in their code), buy loads of crap from big-box stores, get a second mortgage, build a monster house, stick your kid in programs from morning till night, get your hair done like everyone else’s, get a fake tan, starve yourself, make your house’s landscape job better than your neighbors…”
Perhaps this blog could be called “stuff upper-middle class American white people like”? Then again, I’ve noticed that acting as though what is the case in America applies equally to the whole world, is something that is widely favoured the world over!
the peace corp
non-debilitating mental illness
bottled water
fancy cheeses
smoothies
food network
ultimate frisbee
home decorating shows
gay culture
This a slyly funny blog, I must say..Like the tone. it reminds me of Martin Mull’s take on white people from the 70s. Do you get any media coverage? Could be a funny indie movie. sort of anthropoligical look at white people. keep it going. Dead on observations. How about neighborhood cleanups? Yard sales?
psuedo-lesbianism
This is dead-on, with, I would say, the sole exception of hating one’s parents. At least among younger folks (early 20’s and younger) I tend to see a lot of people raised by the “buddy” theory of parenting. This doesn’t apply so much if you are talking about working class folks.
Excellent blog.
online shopping
A lot of people seem to be moaning about the broadly general term of ‘white people’ used on this site. Truly, it does only encompass what the wealthy and the liberal really have access to; but isn’t it the final goal in the modern day to be rich and liberal?
As an Asian girl i like this site, it’s entertaining and sometimes downright scary in its accuracy. It’s fun nodding along to this stuff, and i’m really loving the white people who “get it” and can laugh at this too. we need an Asian one too!
I know I’m white, I got a mirror, but according to your blog I’m definitely not. Are there exceptions? Are poor or southern whites white?
I was thinking what DFCtomm was thinking! I’m a poor southern white, and while some of the things listed on the site sound good, they also sound too “money” for my tastes. Maybe this blog could be called “Stuff white people with money like” or “Stuff yuppies like.”
this site is hilarious. and to the people who complain it’s “reverse racism”, i say- actually, forget it. you’re not worth the effort.
i would agree that the observations lean towards the left-leaning whitey, which is great seeing as they ask for much mocking…. but how about throwing in some observations about all the OTHER white folk out there? you know the ones- the southern bible-beaters, neo-con wall street assholes (and the frat boy date rapists who are training to one day become them), the insanely rich, vapid, and non-liberal (think “real housewives of orange county”). surely they are worthy of as much mocking as their crunchy bretheren….
i often enjoy racial humor, especially at the expense of my own race, but honestly i thought the articles were simply just not very funny.
in the hands of a better writer, this would have been a treat. alas!
“Please remind me again how stereotyping people based on the relative dark or lightness of their skin is funny again… I must have forgotten.”
No, Mark, I’m pretty sure you never knew what humor was.
“Hockey
Hunting
Driving Big Ass SUV to McMegaChurch
Country Music
Voting Republican”
Bob, you’re thinking of crackers, not white people.
It’s basically all the things you’d find on the in-flight magazines on the airplanes
What blows my mind are the comments here from people who think the blog is “brilliant,” etc. LOL! These yuppie jokes are so old they should be carbon 14 dated. Projecting yuppie characteristics onto all whites is as funny as projecting ‘hood characteristics onto all blacks, which is to say, not very.
White people like corporate glass-ceilings, hoarding wealth inter-generationally, neighborhood de facto segregation, failing public schools, sickle-cell anemia, and fast food that kills poor urbanites.
You know, I can’t lie, you’re right about that certain breed of white people, which I do find myself falling into quite a bit of the time. I hate you for it, but I just thought you should know great blog. And I don’t really hate you. I am probably getting that arts degree, too…
No, no. The Author is Canadian!
Photographic proof:
#7 Diversity: photo of Toronto’s Chinatown (there’s a Canadian flag in there and a Toronto Transit Commission streetcar stop sign)
#11 Asian Girls: UBC and Vancouver references.
#15 Yoga: Lululemon. ’nuff said.
#47 Arts Degrees: That’s McGill University’s Arts Building in Montreal.
Also, these refer to a specific subsection of the white population – urbanish, yuppyish – that make up a higher proportion of the Canadian population than it does the American.
I would say that:
(1) The writer is a recent (<10 year) graduate of McGill University
(2) Has lived in or was raised in Vancouver
(3) Currently lives in the United States
Sheeeit! I’m white and I can’t afford a fecking Prius!
Great blog. Should call it What Middle Class White People Like though.
The next entry should be “White people like to prove they are not like other White people.” White people think they are all individuals!
Fantastic blog.
your blog is genius.
white people love to be unique in groups.
white people like being white
Hilarious!
Something white people love to do:
Complain officially.
White people like to DOCUMENT the complaint, as miniscule as it might be (the dressing room was unkempt, etc.) and follow it up as high in the chain as possible.
When white people complain in such a manner, they don’t curse or anything–they try to make it a very professional-sounding whine.
(Well, except for the white person who made your first comment.)
Just an idea.
White people love leaving nearly 400 replies on a blog extolling (and trolling) their virtues to other white people they never met.
Cool site. Much of it relevant to the UK as well.
Oh and “saying that X was much better back in the day (now that everybody knows about it)” (see comment 97)
Interesting and entertaining, although really, these are things liberal elitist snobs of all colors and ethnicities like. I say this as a white liberal elitist snob, myself, but having lived in a diverse and highly educated part of the country for 23 years (Washington, D.C. metro) and now living in blue collar white suburbia (south shore of Long Island) I can say that this is more a class thing than a color thing. The white people where I live now wouldn’t know about, much less care about, a lot of what is here (except to mock it as “college-educated hippie crap”), but go into the Whole Foods on Clarendon Boulevard in Arlington, just outside of D.C., or the one on P Street in the District proper, and you’re going to find shoppers of all ethnicities. In fact, I learned about Whole Foods from some friends who are from Paraguay and Panama, respectively.
That said, white people like Punk from VH-1’s I Love New York 2. Oh, wait, he went to Harvard…
White people will STILL be bread out of existence!
Bwa ha ha ha ha!
This blog is the toaster which will heat up the extinction of the Caucasian loafers…
eating disorders
Cute,…but not cool. Labels of any kind suck. If you want a label, how about What Rich Idiots Like. I’m white jew with a college education received by scholarship and I’m just above the poverty level. I find this crap offensive. Cheers!
Costa Rica
Overexaggerating their fondness for Haggis’s “Crash”
Forever 21 (owned by an Asian, though, so the owner knows what white people liked already)
Green Tea ice-cream
HC, I agree about the Canadian thing. No American would name-drop (or even know, due to them being outside the USA) so many Canadian cities. Plus there’s the Nash and Gretzky thing (Assists) and especially Paul Kariya’s dad (Asian girls). I’m assuming there are multiple authors on this site though, so it’s likely only one or two.
And Chitlj, I’m not missing the point. The point is that despite the many astute and hilarious posts here, there is also a current of vindictiveness and envy running through some of the posts (ex. the obssession with arts degrees and white people always trying to avoid work and trying to paint it hypocritical for white people to get involved in any sort of cause) that takes away from the humor. I’m more than happy to laugh at myself, and did many times throughout, but I couldn’t get past the bitterness in several posts. If I had to guess, I would wager that the writer of these is an Asian (possibly Indian) nerd who struggled through university in engineering or math while watching his white roommates/dormmates in the Arts party, sleep in, get laid etc.
Also, the fact that he’s only ever been around monied and educated blue-state whites is painfully obvious…if he’d been a small town red-state nerd this blog would undoubtedly have had NASCAR, guns, flags, Jesus, mullets etc.
Anyway, I sincererly hope that the writer/s has worked through all his pent up issues through this blog. This would be a far better site without the sour grapes…
Very funny. And you seem to have struck a nerve, so kudos.
They also like:
“Trying to find things on ‘What White People Like’ that they don’t like so they can claim to be less white than average white people.”
My Portuguese grandmother passed on the DNA required to like dark meat, I guess, because I cannot get enough of that stuff…
The blog is funny, if a little over the top at times, but reading through these comments, you’ve offended quite a few white people. So good job!
This might be my favorite blog….ever.
For realla
Saying “Kudos” for a job well done.
I’m hispanic, my husband is white. We got a good laugh out of this site. Look forward to reading more!
Great blog! I live in San Francisco and everything you write is true. That should be your next entry: San Francisco. Forget Manhattan, it’s like a cult. Especially if you live here.
Also, white people really really love to hate smokers. I mean, if you tell somebody you’re HIV+, you get, “Ohmygod, you’re so brave.” If you say you smoke, you get, “That’s disgusting, how can you do such a filthy thing to your body!”
Sustainable everything. Alice Waters. $60 organic, all-natural yoga mats. Mid-century modern.
I began reading this blog feeling amused, and even saved it to show my wife. More I read, though, the more it occurred to me how cruel some of the content is, how derisive, and even vulgar in its meanness.
First, you are obviously not writing about “white people”, as you contend. There’s a certain kind of white person that you despise– arts majors (now there’s a recipe for power and influence in America), those who read books authored by Europeans (Le Carre, Ludlum, Leo Strauss notwithstanding), PhDs (they are over-educated, after all), parents who invest time in their children (may be getting to the root of your issues here). Being that you show an overt hostility to poetics, the environment, and social determinism (poor people shop at Walmart because they like it; and 10% of black males inhabit prisons because they are exercising their free will; etc.), your agenda seems pretty plain.
I’m a white guy, by the way. Working class. I think it’s likely this stuff is conceived by a white male (though women can be every bit as venal as men can), because the ridicule is so naked and graceless– and stupid, in the end. I drive a limo, part-time. I hear the way white men talk when they feel they’re in their own milieu– they talk a lot like you do. Some of them are married to woman-hating bimbos who share their values (and, admittedly, you may be one of those), but mostly they hate their wives, and anything/everything that deviates from their world view. I’m the guy who sees who you really are at 3am, vomit on your shoes not entirely wiped clean, still pining for the company of a twenty year old you’ll never get unless you’re willing to pay. One thing, though– these guys don’t ride bikes, and they don’t worry about the environment, ever. And they aren’t arts majors (if they were, maybe they’d be getting laid at 3am).
“Mock mockers after that…For we traffic in mockery”. Yeats (pronounced “Yates”, by the way, should you ever broach the subject) wrote that. About you. Maybe if you weren’t such a putz (or sleeping with one, if you are, in fact, female) you wouldn’t feel as threatened by the idea of women “having a lot of fantasies about idealized lives”, or any of the rest.
Then again, sometimes a putz is just a putz.
You’re really perspicacious and funny!
Loved your blog.
As a white person living in the Caribbean I thoroughly enjoyed this site. Upon further analysis of the subject, I have been able to conclude (and hence document) the fact that as a white person I do have a culture! I find it rather ironic that through ubiquitous commercialization, my culture has been forced upon other peoples without much consideration to the fact that they may not have been given the means to appreciate my white ethnicity. I have since apologized to my three black friends for being so insensitive.
Sincerely,
Mr. Whiteman
This is satire. It is not racist. It is not sexist. It is not a political commentary. The writing is not meant to be wonderful…it is a satire…get over yourselves, those of you who can’t get past the funny.
This is some of the funniest stuff i’ve ever read. The parts about expensive sandwiches and two last names hits particularly close to home. Seriously though, this is one of the only things on the internet that doesn’t suck. I think your doing a great job and wanted to extend my warmest and sincerest gratitude and encourgament to you. I was also wondering if you could shed some light onto why white people say they listen to the blues when in reality, they don’t know the difference between B.B. King and a Burger King.
I agree with comment 400. I think its amazingly hilarious, and very on point at times. People need to have a sense of humor. If you sat on your laptop and were so frustrated by this blog you banged away some of these annoying comments, I would like to hook you up to a wine i.v or maybe feed you some prozac… cause you really really need to chill.
This is great! It really nails what we white people are like…oh wait…I’m Asian. I always forget this.
This blog makes me want to kill myself….
wait, do white people like suicide?
White people like “Motivational” posters.
I like these…
http://hotlard.wordpress.com/2008/02/13/demotivational-posters-volume-1/
Right on Robert.
I live in the Bay Area and it’s out of control. I mean, this blog basically describes 95% of White people in San Fran.
I don’t get it. It sounds like you’re describing a rather small segment of the white population– particularly the Christian born urban ‘newage’ ‘trendys’. Uber alles I’d say this is some racist hate mongering type shiat but since it’s about white people it’s just fluff?
Whatever, go on with your bad self. At least some people are getting a kick out of it.
This site is hilarious. I told a white person on a bike that the earth says thanks, the moron lit up like he had just won the lottery.
White people are so dumb.
Great job!
Speaking as a white person, I can attest to my deep, passionate love for Dave Eggers. He writes witty books about sad subjects, stared a publishing company for his and other sceney books (not to mention a couple literary magazines, to which I subscribe), AND started a volunteer-run literacy and tutoring group for kids in such tragically under-funded neighborhoods as Park Slope, Brooklyn. I even heard him described as “The Bono of lit” by Jeffrey Eugenides (author of Middlesex) on NPR, and I don’t know if it’s possible to get any whiter than that.
You should also add “90% of white people have no sense of humour” as witnessed in your comments section.
What about Trivia night, and Jam-Bands?
Great blog, guys – Oh I am white, too! But not American-white. Ordinary white, like a lot of other white people who are not American-white.
white people LOVE loft apartments. seriously. whether they’re actually old dirty factory buildings, or (even better), just newly constructed “luxury apartments” that have kinda high ceilings and are described as “lofts” in the marketing brochure. white people are all over that stuff.
I think this blog is a mirror; like art. You see what you see, and what you see is you!
Of course, once you have seen, you can step back and make some assumptions about the author.
This blog succeeded. Got you all thinking about what you like, what offends you, how you are offensive, and on and on……
Well done, though I’m done.
ahahaha i feel so generic now…
this sounds like reverse racism to me
coke?
Racist? OMG no. I’m a suburban white guy who loves to take a look in the Mirror of Truth, sometimes cry, sometimes laugh and sometimes just shrug my shoulders and walk away. Don’t ever stop writing. This is soooo good. Yes, Frank Zappa would have put this stuff to lyrics !!
You discribed my hipster friends to a T. They’re gonna be so pissed when they read this site.
I think the people upset by this blog are the ones that recognize themselves and are irritated by that. It seems to me that the commentary is about those that are engaging in mundane, mainstream activities but somehow think they are the only ones doing it or are somehow doing it differently than others (trip to europe, not owning a tv). The writers are clearly calling from inside the house.
To those saying it’s racist, there are more than a few blogs that poke fun at the more ridiculous aspects of black culture. And yes they are funny. If you are unable to laugh at yourself, then your life is truely sad.
O yeah.
White people like to pretend that they don’t see race
For what it’s worth, I was directed to this site by James Joyner’s OTB blog.
I’m sorry to say that I don’t get it. Most of the stuff here is totally alien to my experience. A lot of it is incomprehensible. I conclude this must be some Northeast Corridor (DC to Boston) stuff or maybe something from the Left Coast. I feel certain that non-whites from your region relate to this better than I do. Nevertheless, I’ll keep on reading because the things I do understand are very funny.
This page has humorous elements, and I’ll be the first to asknowledge that.
You might, however, want to consider the following: saying that blacks are all poor and like drugs and beating women would never be okay to say. Saying that white people are all rich, hypocritical, and self-centered shouldn’t be either. You’re really talking about yuppies, and while yuppies are indeed hysterical subjects (there’s been whole books dedicated to making fun of them), they can hardly stand in for the entire Caucasian world.
As for making children read 9th-grade level books and working them so hard the poor kids have breakdowns, I suspect Asians have the corner on that activity. But we wouldn’t want to make fun of that, would we? Darn, that’s not nearly as trendy as making fun of white people.
This is hilarious. I applaud you.
Love the humor in this blog and I’m a recovering white guy. In fact, after reading your stuff I decided to go on an intense de-caucafication. That’s right, I’ve thrown all of the mayonaise out of the house. Instead of laughing when I watch COPS I actually get upset now. But the biggest change, has been forsaking the comb-over for my new corn rows do. It was tough to accomplish mind you and so what if all that have is a solitary “row” of so-called “corn” dividing the two hemispheres of my head, it’s not white friends. Next week, I’m gonna try picking some credible street slang.
A black friend of hook me up with this phrase for saying see you later, “forshiznics my popcornsters!” I’m fast on my way to becoming a honorary non-white guy you ‘ll have to admit. Befizzle gizzles! (man, I’m really getting the hang of this. I can’t wait to get some more of that slang from my new black friend DeQ’uanye).
I just counted, and my fiance has a masterful 61/70 score on this site. I asked her if she liked each item over the phone and she thought I was mocking her. “Of course I love David Sedaris!” Can anybody beat that?
Also:
Dave Matthews Band
Mountain Climbing/Snow Shoeing
Ridiculously Expensive Candles
Ethnic Street Festivals
Cul-de-sacs
Vince Vaughn
This site is hilarious, but I have one question: what DON’T white people like?
Judging by these comments it would appear that we all agree that almost every aspect of modernity and American culture is “white”. Even if it is not. Does this make us all racist? Can I no longer laugh at ‘Blazing Saddles’?
I’m not sure if your blog has made my day or ruined everything I’ve ever held dear. But thanks anyway.
Mostly white people don’t think about being white. They are just white. They don’t go through being white enough or too white or the right white. Occasionally you will hear folks holler about white trash (Britney Spears or the Dukes of Hazzard) but all in all – white people take being white for what it is. And you know what that is. Not having to worry about being not white.
White people are genuinely stunned when a police pulls them over. They are not afraid to mouth off and that’s because they are white and will get a good lawyer even if they are poor and white.
When they go into a store they like the idea that if anyone gives them the shoplifter warning look they can go off. That is a perk of being white.
They like the fact that slavery and the Holocaust didn’t really have anything to do with them and they weren’t there so why do people get so upset.
They like their hair no matter what they say.
The only words white people really use to describe skin color is pasty or peaches and cream. There are no variations. They like this because it keeps it simple.
They love the fact that there is no really, offensive insulting ugly word they can be used for being white. No N word especially. They like they can use the bad words as jokes because they are white and everyone is supposed to think they don’t mean it. They mean it.
They like not standing out in a crowd of other white people and they stay away from places where they will stand out in a crowd because they are deeply afraid of a race riot but won’t admit it.
I really would like to post these comments. If you tell me how I will.
I like your blog.
sooo… what you’re saying is that anybody who’s not white hates the earth?
#428 thinks this site is awesome. Keep it up!
When am I gonna get royalties from this shit? I’ve been doing this joke for 40 years and shit. A white guy drives like this. A black guy drives like this. Message: white people are lame.
Actually, I do! Because I LOVE COFFEE!!! And writer’s workshops! And recycling! But I don’t hate my parents and I don’t like expensive sandwiches and God knows I can’t afford a Pious, er, I mean a Prius.
So I guess that means I’m conflicted.
Where’s “emotional turmoil” fall on the list?
FWIW the post cut off my last line which should have sigged “dumb clueless white broad”. For I am that and I am proud. Maybe that should be #72, after “Emotional Turmoil”.
“They like the fact that slavery and the Holocaust didn’t really have anything to do with them and they weren’t there so why do people get so upset.”
Um… what now? Of course it did. (I mean, not personally b/c I am not old enough to TECHNICALLY have been in either place.) And of course we should be upset about it. Why wouldn’t we be? Why shouldn’t everybody be? I don’t know anyone who isn’t. You make no sense. The rest of your post makes some sense. This does not.
You need to make a post about how much white people like facebook and how myspace is for sexual predators and brown people.
the sorority chick, frat guy and finance asshole aspect of white people is also underrepresented/
I laughed – I hope that was your goal – cause your site is funny … but i’m white and none of your posts describe me …cept for maybe #1, and #33…
otherwise – you could replace “black” for every “white” in your postings, or “hispanic” …doesn’t make sense – but funny none the less…
after a second read – i think it should be changed to stuff american white people like … truly your not that clued in to European whites (who don’t carry the american guilt) or Canadian whites – who are pretty much the opposite of every one of your entries…
I think its funny that people get on this site and get all offended by white not being the correct classification, like THEY aren’t white people like this. We all could use a little mocking, if you’re white and none of this applies to you, well that’s no fun. I mean, sure its not accurate, but when was any racial classification based on skin color accurate?
Homer Simpson watching stand up on t.v.
Black comic: “Black people drive like this, white people drive like this!”
Homer: “It’s true, we’re so lame!”
Some white people work at sandwich shops because the job market is no longer open to them because of EOEs and companies get more money when they higher lower-qualified minorities.
when can we get over race and acknowledge it as social stratification.
As a White person myself, I have to say this is a fantastic blog.
So many of these things apply to me, such as not having a TV (but liking arrested development, daily show, and colbert report anyway), campaigning for Barack Obama, enjoying great wine and microbrews, travel, and loving priuses (don’t have on myself, but there are two of them in my family!) I also do a lot of pilates and yoga, and I definitely think I know what’s right for poor people. Oh, and I’m getting a PhD now so I can be a professor some day, even if I have to settle for “adjunct” and live “humbly” off my inheritance.
White people love magazines, specifically obscure “cooler-than-thou” periodicals …and/or… lifestyle magazines: Dwell, Nest (defunct) Metropolitan Home, Metropolis, Wallpaper*. The magazines allow them to fantasize about having desireable rooms never touched by paperwork, dirt/dust or the trifling crap of everyday life. Similarly, they want furniture that appears to never have been sat in, designy objects that were never used and a house designed to look good the second it’s completed and no other time. They like to fantasize about unused rooms where they can put their unused KitchenAid mixer.
These periodicals show very desireable ’simple’ homes where untold energy must be spent not just making the house look clean and tidy, but making it look like it’s never been used. Any hint of wear or uncleanliness is old-school or of lesser taste. They’ve elevated this neuroses so high that it has displaced architecture which used to be about making buildings, but is now about making ’spaces.’ The highest non-sexual gratification possible for a white person is to have their home published in one or more of these mags.
White people dislike aging so much that they’ve banished it from their minds, completely forgetting that the phenomenon can’t be halted in non-living things either. Sadly an occupant need not consent, for the world to begin wearing down their new machine-made object/home the 2nd the last tile is on the roof.
*Wallpaper should just be retitled “Cool Places to Fuck Magazine”
I love this. Well written and punchy.
My suggestion is, “Not identifying peoples or cultures by race.” White people have a really hard time with this one.
White people like to self-identify their ethnicities:
Ex: “I am Irish/Italian/German on my mother’s side and Australian/English/French-Canadian on my father’s side. My brother-in-law’s Jewish and one of my really good friend’s in black!”
WTF?
wish this was funnier. nice idea, but it doesn’t make me laugh. making fun of people isn’t hilarious in and of itself. just my 2 cents.
White people like to name their daughters Heather.
I’ve gotta love it. “White people” is it’s own ethnicity now, not based on the color of your skin, but the predictability of the things you do. You can be white and not be a “white person”, as this site would define it… you could be a redneck. (Proud to be a ‘neck myself.) A guy who drives around a dirty truck and listens to Toby Keith is “that redneck guy” whereas `a womyn driving a Prius listening to Poe is “That white girl”. Classic.
And I love all the “white people” who have commented on how racist this blog is as they sip their free trade coffee, reading this on a mac, listening to peter bjorn & john, and trying to impress their imaginary ethnic friends on the internets.
I am Black. And THIS IS HILARIOUS! Slightly problematic. Slightly offensive. But nevertheless. This blog is ridiculously funny.
seems pretty good to be white, all in all. the list of predictable behaviors seems to include a lot of exercise, consideration for others, and attempted appreciation and respect for art. As far as stereotypes go, that’s pretty sweet.
Nirvana rocks!
wow, disturbing.
bookstores
coffee shops
college towns: Austin, TX; Madison, WI; Ann Arbor, MI; Eugene, OR; Boulder, CO
eco-friendly soaps, detergents, shampoo/conditioner
bike/walking paths/lanes
the new yorker
arts/culture events: opera, modern dance, symphony, jazz
art galleries
public transportation, but only in cities like NYC, DC, and abroad (not where it is too dirty or inconvenient or there are too many “sketchy” people riding)
207. To control the argument
This is probably the ONLY blog I’ve ever seen where the “about” page has so many comments! I just found you…interesting angle!
#65 Co-ed sports? Brilliant! Ha ha. I love this blog.
Keep it up!
When are you going to option this blog to film production companies? If you don’t, I will — and will knock out the screenplay in 4 weeks.
stuff whiter people like:
fast walking. because they wouldn’t want anyone to think they weren’t in a rush to something important.
I’m a white, Barak Obama-loving, nonprofit-working, tea-drinking, arts-degreed, Arrested Development-loving, NPR-obsessed, New York Times-reading, wine lover with a full set of All-Clad in the kitchen. LOVE the site!
I you have not read David Brooks’ Bobos in Paradise, you really must. Also, don’t forget about Urban Pioneering–white people love being the first white yuppy to move in to a neighborhood 5 years away from gentrification.
While this website is definitely amusing, what’s truly hilarious is the people who can’t see the humor in it and get defensive about what would happen if someone dared to do a site like this on another race.
Really the purpose it serves is pointing out how tightly wound people are, and how miserable a lot of us can really be. Chill out people.
#22, I can’t even begin to understand how you could possibly be Proud to be white. I myself am “white” (as my genes are mostly made up of English blue-blood, I think euro-Caucasian is the technical term), and am quite embarrassed by my ancestor’s history of enslaving, slaughtering, shunning/excommunicating, and denying the most basic human dignity to any person or race we deem “inferior” for reasons as arbitrary as they come. And that’s just my list of complaints having to do with interracial relationships… lest we forget our history of gross corruption, greed, and immorality. 2000 years of this behavior, and for the most part we STILL haven’t learned. Even if this site *was* deemed as “racist” (which I totally disagree with), we would totally deserve it….finally a taste of our own medicine, persay. (and there’s another thing white people like…. CLICHES!)
Ranting aside, I love this website! It’s not a perfect mirror of own my life (as mentioned, this is more of an analysis of middle-class “yuppie” white people–a group in which I’m too financially destitute to be classified within) but in principle you’ve created a nearly flawless mirror, albeit dismal, of white American society.
“439 Anonymous
Some white people work at sandwich shops because the job market is no longer open to them because of EOEs and companies get more money when they higher lower-qualified minorities.”
or, maybe they didn’t hire said people because they couldn’t get their grammar straight and STILL blamed the “lower-qualified minorities.”
bring on the delicious overpriced sandwiches!
Oh… another thing white people love… “ellipses”! You know, that triple dot think at the end of a thought which could have just as easily been replaced by writing in more fluid grammar and the use of a comma, colon, or semi-colon.
Well… at least I love ellipses.
As a white person, I can say this list is pretty freaking accurate. The breakfast and marathon posts could not be truer.
For those offended, seriously, it’s all in good spirit. Relax, have a good chuckle as you sip your coffee and read the NY Times. That’s what I’m doing!
459 Paul,
You must have a sad life my friend. MY ancestors weren’t a part of any of the crimes you speak of. In fact, as Welsh citizens of an oppressive British empire, you could say they were victims themselves. To say “white” people were responsible for enslaving, slaughtering, shunning/excommunicating, and denying the most basic human dignity to any person or race we deem “inferior” for reasons as arbitrary as they come. – is to have a completely delusional view of history. Do you really think the lowest peasant has the blood of slavery on his/her hands? It is a select few white beaurocrats who will ultimetly pay for this crime. Not me, not you. If your family were slave owners then I guess you have a right to feel bad. But don’t you realize that the people commenting on this blog are mocking white people for feeling guilty about something they had nothing to do with? Do you think the French feel responsible for Nepolean? How lame.
Some to think about:
- Partying in the third world (or eastern europe)
- Seasonal properties (ie “winter houses” or “summer houses”)
- Creating new neurological or psychological diseases to explain things slightly out of the norm like, for example, laziness due to sheer boredom (“mental fantigue”), etc.
OH also: whatever hot new trendy gourmet ingredient is being sold in Williams-Sonoma (ie grey salt or coffee beans that have been through the digestive system of a jungle cat).
How about “Getting pissed off on other people’s behalf without having been asked” (See #326 and others) or “Taking themselves entirely too seriously”?
I’d be angry at this blog for being racist if it wasn’t so damned accurate! It might be more appropriately called “Things White 20-Something Hipster Yuppies Like”, but whatever specific demographic you’re talking about, you’ve described most of the white people I know (including myself).
One thing white people really love is how blacks yell “racist” for everything, but then make a blog like this. yeah!!!
white people love fear
Found this via a link from Pajiba.com and laughed out loud. Very funny! I’ll skip the “As a Blah-Blah ethnic yada yada American” defense mechanism and just say keep up the good work.
As a headphone/indie rock/general snob, there was nothing I wanted less than an iPod, I might as well get a Volkswagon, a Powerbook and a seat at Starbucks…
The Zen Vision is incredible, the screen is so bright, navigation is easy, but could be better, and it plays ALL video not just MP4 (conversion sucks, asks anyone who has to render video)…it has a contact list, calendar, battery life is ground, the sound is wonderful…my only criticism is that you need to throw the Creative headphones in the garbage and get some Shure’s, Grado, or Koss PortaPros (at $50, the best headphones for the price in teh world)…
in short – easy to use, easy to navigate, great features, great price, looks good, amazing screen…
you’re funny. but i still can’t believe you beat icanhascheezburger.com in the stats race! speaking of which, do white people like lolcats?
but i’m sure white people are crazy about their pets! they worship their dogs and cats. give them ostentatious homes, feed them mercilessly and, when the pets die, probably even give them elaborate funerals.
i really hope you can write something about white people and their pets
i’m not white, but i love pets anyway… and ellipses it so happens.
you’re funny. but i still can’t believe you beat icanhascheezburger.com in the stats race! speaking of which, do white people like lolcats?
but i’m sure white people are crazy about their pets! they worship their dogs and cats. give them ostentatious homes, feed them mercilessly and, when the pets die, probably even give them elaborate funerals.
i really hope you can write something about white people and their pets
i’m not white, but i love pets anyway… and ellipses it so happens.
other stuff white people like… hmmm… “civilizing” other nations and cultures. historically, it’s called the “white man’s burden”, isn’t it?
other stuff white people like… hmmm… “civilizing” other nations and cultures. historically, it’s called the “white man’s burden”, isn’t it?
add “snitching” to the list.
how about “civilizing” other nations and cultures? wasn’t that what was historically known as the “white man’s burden”?
how about “civilizing” other nations and cultures? wasn’t that what was historically known as the “white man’s burden”?
This blog is brilliant. ‘Stuff bourgie white liberals like’ would be a more accurate title, although it does not flow as well the ever so simple but nevertheless perfect ‘Stuff White People Like’.
The posts on this site might as well be prereqs for getting into liberal arts colleges, as nearly all of the sheep who attend them are clearly the sample population for this study.
The hypocrisy and vanity of the spoiled white kids who I went to school with was astounding, and by far the rule rather than the exception.
Learning about others, for these kids, was always achieved without ever having to leave their comfort zones. Indeed, highly valued activities such as eating out at ‘ethnic’ restaurants, taking one semester of a foreign language, and shopping for ethnically marked clothing, were all vigorously pursued in the company of- surprise- other sheltered, upper-middle class white kids. And the saddest and most hypocritical aspect of these forays into ‘diversity’ was that such activities were in reality quietly judged to be of cultural importance only insofar as other white people were doing them.
omg this blog is so funny… so true to some cases but not to some. ;P coming from an abc, too!!
Oh, and another thing white people like: Self-ironically referring to themselves as “white people” and starting a blog to point out everything that is lame and/or predictable about “white people”, just to make sure no one tells it to their face first.
As a white person i can read this, compare my habits to those discussed, and then engage in the following mental process: compliment myself on sharing few or none of these habits; criticize myself for caring enough to compliment myself on this; thereby demonstrate to myself my share in the tendency–oft-mentioned in this blog–of self-hatred among whites of ourselves and our ethnicity; et cetera ad nauseam.
In short, if you are white and, like me, read this blog smugly to yourself thinking how, thank God! that I’m not like this, the joke’s on you and me both, I guess.
The bizarre structure of white self-identity cannot stand up to the minutest scrutiny.
someone wrote, “yuppy” some posts backj. what does ‘yuppy’ mean?
do white people like getting in heated ‘Comment’ debates?
밖에 눈온다와 토끼 단지 의해 실행합니다
Stuff Black People Like Fried Chicken, Watermelon, Welfare & Going to jail
Well hello there!
This is really, rather a cool site. Mmm, it’s a very, interesting and informative blog. I absolutely enjoy learning about different races. Maybe when I leave little old England we could hook up for a drink and swap notes. Toodle pip! (upper class colloquial goodbye – UK)
WHY is it that British middle class people always have to ramp up the “jolly hockey sticks” and “toodle pip” when they talk to Americans or go to America. Trust me, NO ONE says sh*t like that in the UK.
I think this site is fucking awesome.
As a white guy trying to fit into hipster-laden Portland, this provides me with many useful suggestions for more effectively communicating with my elitist soon-to-be-friends! I figure once I get the hang of it here I can try Manhattan or even San Fran!
At first I kind of felt bad about trying to be so fucking white and hip all the time, but then I remembered that a lot of the things white people like, such as local organic produce and bicycles and world travel, all have very good reasons behind them.
The problem isn’t really liking the things on this list. The problem is privilege and pretentiousness, acting all prissy and special because you’re living ‘consciously’. Oh, you listen to mainstream music? Ugh. I never eat at McDonald’s if I can help it, it’s so fucking disgusting. Have you never been to New York, really? The problem is elevating the stuff on this list as the end-all be-all of ideal living. White people also like off-roading, motorcycles, hunting, fishing, and bowling, but none of that’s on the list because we are talking particular white people here.
Of course, if I am among the super-white and I’m feeling unable to hang, I sometimes like to pull out the big guns and tell a funny story set at my fabulous 1920s craftsman-style summer house on the lake overlooking the mountains in New Hampshire where I can casually mention my Harvard-educated snobby Manhattanite relatives without specifically bragging. That shuts em up for a minute at least, and as a bonus it works great on the dumber upwardly mobile middle class chicks!
Well, here are a few more things that white people like that I have learned over the years.
1. Making racist jokes while saying that they are not racist.
2. Putting their hands over their wallets/purses when black people walk near them.
3. Thinking they know what is best for everyone else while their lives are a complete mess.
White people like SAABs
you should include a post on kuffiyahs/anti-war scarves.
also for the record, arrested development ROCKS.
If we cannot laugh at ourselves, then who CAN we laugh at?
I am: Mixed race (North Africa, Middle East, Russian, Turkish and don’t forget the Caucas re: Caucasian Mountains – are home to Kurds and some Persians!) – all faith traditions in my family. “Faith Traditions” instead of “Religion” is very WP.
I married Russian/Eastern Euro nice Jewish Boy – we adopted a daughter from Southern India. Our family laughs A LOT at ourselves and our cultural mix, political mix etc.
BFF and I were out this weekend calling each other “sistah” and calling my daughter “L’il D” – we like to pretend we are cool and AA. I drive a VOLVO, live in the ‘burbs, practice YOGA and meditation, work in multiculti world, am an improv comedienne, try REALLY hard NOT to be so WP! But I am sometimes…I am!
Blessings and Laughter to all.
I thought the site was funny, but at times it spilled over into a bitterness which was not so funny. I agree with Tom Sawyer that these seemed like they were written by an Asian with a chip on his shoulder. I suppose it’s better to deal with your anger this way than to go ‘Virginia Tech’. Some of the best entries reminded me of Douglas Coupland’s ‘Generation X’ in the way they caught middle-class white American culture, but it also left me wondering if white people will still find it funny to be laughed/hated when we become a minority ourselves. At the moment we are laughing from a position of dominance, which is easy.
Don’t forget “OTHER WHITE PEOPLE!”
Your blog is awesome keep up the good work!
At Wrigley Field, us “white people” pee in ‘troughs’. I’m not even sure what the fuck a ‘troth’ is…
Heh…”Black people walk like this, and white people walk like that!”
It’s a little uncomfortable to read, but there’s a lot of truth in it…I guess a lot of white stereotypes are as funny to black people as black stereotypes for white people. Maybe real racism won’t go away until we can all joke about the weird and stupid things we do.
So who wants to go get some fried chicken and do yoga?
If you ever wonder about the stigma attached to the word nigger you have to look non further then this blog. Here though is the same fascist comentary but from the other side of the racial divide. It is, in short, unamerican and easilly despised.
There is a certain cohort of “whites” that seems to have been sadly neglected by this blog – the blue collar whites. These whites, though diminishing in their visibility within mainstream American culture, do show up occasionally, especially during election years wherein other white politicians attempt to court the blue collar vote by appearing as union supporters and lovers of large Ford and Chevrolet trucks.
Some activities enjoyed by the BCW (blue collar white) include:
- bowling
- monster truck rallies (indoor or outdoor),
- keggers,
- hunting (especially large animals wherein the BCW has to attract the animal by smothering himself with its urine),
- fishing (especially large fishing wherein the BCW has to tell a story finishing with the line “this big!”),
- bingo (especially church-attending BCWs and those about the age of 55)
- watching “the game” (especially if a city or local rivalry is involved; sometimes college, though it is rare for the BCW to attend said college),
- holiday parades (especially Veteran’s Day, Independence Day, and Labor Day if they are still union),
- backyard barbeques (especially on aforementioned holidays, directly after aforementioned parades).
The BCW, though a vanishing member of American society, can still be observed in many areas. I suggest that the BCW should be added to your list of “whites” for possible analysis of “things whites love.”
Thank you.
These BCW’s you refer to are known as ‘rednecks’.
- global music (David Byrne, Paul Simon, Vampire Weekend, etc.)
- Che t-shirts
- Facebook groups
- rogue economists
- Jonathan Safran Foer
- Law and Order reruns
- The Wire
good stuff
ps – the author(s) are indeed white: christian & jessica lander. i cannot believe that tom sawyer didn’t do 2 minutes of digging into the site before s/he wrote that thesis!
if laughing at this site makes me a racist – poof! – im a racist mofo.
“why is it that white people control everything in the f’ing universe…except for little bad ass timmy and amanda?”
- comedian d.l. hughley
but i guess this would be better posted on stuffwhitepeopledontlike.com – disciplining their kids.
Writing about semicolons:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/18/nyregion/18semicolon.html
Your generalizations are actually incredibly ignorant. Probably as ignorant as a lot of white folk that think that most blacks will greet each other with a high five and wazzzuppp…or that maybe when most Latinos say they will meet you in an hour that that actually means two or three hours…or that for both of these enthicities birth control means getting tooooo drunk to get it up……..the expectation of what a culture may be “like” is truly one of the biggest blunders by immigrating people to the USA….it’s like when you meet a foreigner and you find out that all of their”understandings” of the country that they are trying to emulate to “be cool”, or to be like the locals…..is taken from stupid ass movies they saw……I love to joke around and all, but in real life I don’t ever expect anyone to “be” like this or like that….I just hope they are respectful, not sick, and somewhat intelligent…..what I hate most about the stereo typing you indicate here is that a lot of immigrants think that “having an attitude” is a cool way to define yourself…man that is such bullshit, and another pop culture mistake made by a lot of young immigrants to the US….personally, and this goes for a lot of women…take that tude and stick it where the sun never shines(unless an anal whore)……there is nothing worse than a woman acting like a man…(again, unless your a closet gay and you want to marry a woman who wants to give it to you up ur ass in all respects, and slap you around like a little bitch)….there are a lot of white people like that …..but I aint seen them yet in ur blog here….again I think GRIMMNAR hit’s it right on the head……you are talking about a percentage of whites that is less than 10%, and have actually no idea wtf they are supposed to do with their life….some relaize that the family dynamic is what brings real happiness, but because they are soo hung up on themselves, they are never the adult, tehy want the attention that is being bestowed on their own child……in other words,,,,they never grow up….unfortunately this happens to be a greater misfortune in all the other races in the world black and brown specifically, as evidenced by the incredibly high number of out of wedlock children and fatherless homes, crime, rape,apathy, ignorance…………………WHILE A LOT OF WHITES MIGHT BE THE STEREOTYPE YOU INDICATE HERE, WHEN IGNORANCE AND STUPIDITY IS THE “COOOL” THING TO BE ….AS EVIDENCED BY MOST INNER CITY SCHOOL PROGRAMS WHICH HAPPEN TO BE RUN BY THE MINORITIES, THEN YOU WILL HAVE A DECLINING SOCIETY….IT’S LIKE THE BLACK GUY WHOSE NAME IS BRIAN (HOW HE AND HIS MOM PRONOUNCES IT, REMEMBER HIS DADA DON’T EVEN KNOW HIS NAME), BUT IT’S SPELLED BYRON, AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN BECASUE WHEN SHE WAS TOLD THAT SHE WAS SPELLING IT WRONG, SHE WAS TOO PROUD (OR IGNORANT? WHICH IS IT?) TO SAY OH LET ME CORRECT THAT, INSTEAD IT WAS “WELLL THAT’S HOW WE SPELL IT IN UGONDORIA IN MY FAMILY HISTORY,BLAH,BLAH” BSS………..AND ANYONE WHO THINKS MY BLOG HAS ANY ACTUAL SERIOUSNESS TO IT IS JUST WAYYYYYY TO UPTIGHT MAN….YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT AND CHECK URSELF…(THAT MEANS GRAB UR CROTCH)…….is this still funny??????………………………………………………………….oH AND 406 SAYS “YOU’VE DESCRIBED TO A t 98% OF THE PEOPLE IN SAN FRAN….THAT EQUALS.0002% OF ALL GAY WHITES,,,,,,,AND .000002 OF ALL WHITES PERIOD……MAN YOU ARE SOOO RIGHT ON THE MARK….NOT!!!
for stuff white people like, how about “looking for real estate on realtor.com”
I’m not sure which is funnier – the blog, or the people getting indignant over obvious satire.
Lighten up and laugh a little!
I’m doing stuffblackpeoplelike… This is just too funny to pass up!
…And as a black person who’s spent too much time around whites, this is totally on point.
How about :
Stuff the Dominant American Culture of White Anglo Saxon Protestant People Like
Just to please everyone.
Or :
Stuff people with money, who most often have pale complexions, like
Topic suggestions: horseback riding, the national park system, chai latte, using words like “kitch” or “quaint,” being quiet in public, etc.
White people like black culture; not actual black people, just their culture and music.
If these turkeys can make broad unsupportable statements, so can I.
I’m pretty much as white as they come. (wait for it…) At least that’s what my brother tells me while we’re playing this game called “throatbox” where we walk around jabbing each other in the soft spot at the bottom of our necks, and I think this blog is hilarious.
Write on!
When is someone going to create the blogs “Stuff Black People Like, “Stuff Latino People Like,” or “Stuff Asian People Like”?
If they do, they’d probably be blasted with unusual whiny comments, and be berated for it.
But since it’s socially acceptable for people to bash white people, it’s all good I guess.
———-
And the above is just an example of me acting like a jackass.
Enjoying the blog.
Another thing white people like: this site.
Though no longer a going concern, Joy Division represent a historical high-water mark for straight white music. It’s their Holy Grail. Mind you they don’t actually listen to them anymore, but you must fall in line with reverence and superlatives about JD if you are to take your own place in the white pecking order.
It’s as romantic as the era of Romantic literaure (Love wil tear us apart, again!) but it feels more modern to name drop Joy Division once a year or so.
Also true, producing a paradox, is that white people like the Carpenters.
another thing that white people like:
reading comments on a blog named “stuffwhitepeoplelike” where people of all races get CRAAAAZY.
Lurkerbot said it best
What is white people?