As white people get older, they like to make clear boundaries between their professional and personal lives. They don’t mind talking about their personal life at work, but they hate talking about their work life when they are enjoying a weekend or vacation. But with blackberries and laptops, white people could be working anywhere, at any time. So how do you know when they are off the clock? It’s easy, check their clothes.
When white people aren’t working, they generally like to wear Outdoor Performance Clothes. The top suppliers of these garments and accessories include North Face, REI, Mountain Equipment Co-Op, Columbia Sportswear, and Patagonia.
When you see white people wearing these, it is important that you do not discuss business matters. Instead you should say things like “where did you get that fleece?” and “what’s that thing holding your keys to your shorts?” White people will be more than happy to talk to you about their sustainably produced possessions.
The main reason why white people like these clothes is that it allows them to believe that at any moment they could find themselves with a Thule rack on top of their car headed to a national park. It could be 4:00 p.m. on a Saturday when they might get a call “hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.”
Though it is unlikely that they will receive this call, White people hate the idea of missing an opportunity to enjoy outdoor activities because they weren’t wearing the right clothes.
If you plan on spending part of your weekend with a white person, it is strongly recommended that you purchase a jacket or some sort of “high performance” t-shirt, which is like a regular shirt but just a lot more expensive.
Stuff White People Like 
spontaneous snowboarding ftw!
willawaw
college white girl staples: a northface (preferably pink) and uggs
You make me laugh.
This is too funny! REI rules!
http://www.jonesview.wordpress.com
Holy shit… I’m one of the first.
KINGIEVAN
That’s hilarious. This past Christmas, my wife’s company gave out fleece jackets like the ones in the picture. She contributes to this blog…
http://moveitmoveit.wordpress.com
I think there is some sort of connection between living in cities named “Portland” and wearing high performance, fancy fleece jackets with taped seems and zippers.
Here in Oregon, we even have local brands like Nau, Columbia, Patagonia, and Mountain Hardware. You walk through our fancy district (the pearl) and every lady seems to be wearing a pair of Manolo Blahnik 5 inch heels and an olive green Patagonia fleece shell.
And over in the other Portland (Maine) they love to dress head to toe in nappy old Northface jackets from 1998…. poor people of Maine… so lacking in high style.
The best is when they wear mutltiple layers so as to be ready for ANY kind of weather condition. Even at their indoor desk job…..
Omgsh that is the most accurate white person quality ever! That pic is hilarious too, I saw a couple wearing matching red Patagonia fleece’s yesterday!
The last few posts have been kinda lame. Clothes, clothes, clothes. Okay white people like clothes. You know what else white people like? When a blog they keep going to has continuously entertaining posts so that their downtime can be filled with filling their brains with useless information and jokes. Funny story though…i’m black.
see: Perez Hilton
I love this website/blog. I hope their new entries continue to be dope.
In Seattle, people even wear their North Face jackets (and it’s always North Face) to work. The only excuse for not doing this is if you are over 50 and/or have to wear a suit. I guess the idea is that if you wear a blazer over your slacks and dress shirts, everybody will know you’re going to the office whereas the North Face jacket is supposed to say “surprise, my office is in a tent/kayak”. I guess this beats the other traditional Seattle garb of a wool topcoat that’s way too warm for any weather ever encountered here.
Another popular one is the down vest. Even though I’m an owner of one of these contraptions, I’ve yet to figure out what actually makes it so great in any situation other than skiing on a warm day.
Hear hear! That thing holding keys to my friends’ shorts evaded me for years until I realized it was their connection to a hiking lifestyle that they could swing without pulling a muscle.
And I always feel like the outdoor clothing is an indication that well, we just might have climbed down from the closest snowcapped peak to grab this java at Starbucks. Appearing to be in a state of constant and serious exploration of the outdoors seems to be key.
I love your blog! Reading it while living a middle-of-nowhere town in the Peruvian Andes makes this even more amusing! (And watching my friends take all your instructions very seriously when I translate it for them. I haven’t figured out a way to explain the humorous edge in Spanish yet.)
Can I just say that I hate northface jackets? Ok well, I hate them.
guftaballs for real. it’s a terrible look. the guys are just as bad though. you’re not allowed in big-10 frats unless you’ve got a black denali. i’ve seen packs of 30-plus all wearing identical north face’s and jeans. college BDUs (bar dress uniforms).
Now you are just running out of stuff. Get back to the funny!
They even make those dumb Northface Fleece jackets in little kid sizes. Like it is a genetic trait you can pass on to your children!
Like the being white!
http://gaycondo.wordpress.com
Such fleeces are both extremely light and extremely warm; except for the fact that they are often extremely pricey, I’d say they’re extremely the win.
gaycondo,
L.L. Bean.
end.
Nothing yippies love more than buying a Made in China $350.00 The North Face “X-Treme Super Squall Shell” with their REI Co-Op Membership Card, you know, to give back.
Nevermind lining Mao’s pockets. I need something to wear to the next “Free Tibet” rally!
It could also be that white people want to always create the illusion that they have either just been running outdoors, or ar about to go running outdoors at any moment when they are not being forced to work.
Same for us “other” white people except with hunting/fishing apparel (or anything that looks similar to hunting apparel or is camouflage). Just representin’ where we’d rather be.
Wow, I live in New England and this is true around here.
Damn I’m white and I beez rather eatching cheekin at da local KFC and drinkin a forty of olde english
I don’t know a white person who doesn’t own a north face fleece. Because their fleeces far outperform a cheap one from taret
I think white people also like driving cars that they believe match their lifestyle. Aka, the same white people that like high performance clothing are almost guaranteed to be driving a subaru outback, volkswagon golf, volvo, or saab 9-3. They can often be found driving around with a kayak strapped to the top and no water within 100 miles. Some will even leave their Thule rack on all year just so people know they went on a super sick ski trip once last year.
This one cracks me up. I’ve worked at two REI’s one out in the suburbs where the north face “Denali” jackets must have accounted for 45% of our sales.
The local North Face rep says that as a company they “hate the denali jacket and wish it would “go away””.
I’m ahalf mexican, so this blog is a gold mine of cultural references that I never understood. Thank you so much.
As a White Person, I feel proud to break the stereotype and only wear my Outdoor Performance Clothes when I’m Performing Outdoors.
Of course, that hasn’t happened in four years now. But that time I was on top of a mountain.
“Thule rack”? Looks like the Prius is sporting a Mohawk.
Kata,
Nau.
End.
http://gaycondo.wordpress.com
How could you forget L.L. Bean? That is the very epitome of white kayakness.
High performance clothes are very big in Germany too, signalling that a white person is going out for a walk with dog/mountain bike ride/jog and cannot be deterred from leisure time activities.
I have noticed that the only time my very own husband doesn’t answer his Blackberry is when he is wearing hi-per clothes. You’ve got something there.
Don’t forget Underarmour.
It’s always reassuring to look inside this rugged winterwear and see “Made in Bangladesh”, “Made in Vietnam”, “Fabriqué(e) en Indonésie”, etc. Just the right stuff for scaling a fake mountain.
Do all REI stores have a fake mountain you can climb, or just the one down the street from the Mall of America?
it should be also noted that the north face has “sold out” and is no longer cool. mountain hardware is the new north face.
Re #33: I wasn’t picking on the engineering skills of Bangladeshis, Vietnamese and Spice Islanders, but what would they know about Alaskan winters?
(You gotta CYA here; so many posters misinterpret the most innocent statements and get all huffy about it– so “white” of them, too!)
REI…you said it best.
http://www.platenuts.com
hahahaha. this one was pretty funny. you got me worried for a while w/ some of the more recent really lame posts.
i was waiting for this one!!!!!
perfect
I love the irony of the advertising found here now…
It is perfect really… read about the outdoor clothing of white people… and then you can order it on the same page!
HeartlandsWorldOutfitter
Supplying all your outdoor needs! Shooting,Hunting,Camping & More
http://www.heartlandsworldoutfitter.comOutdoor Stores
Great prices and free shipping on orders over $74
http://www.ramseyoutdoor.comClimbing Shirt
New style of Eco Friendly Climbing Shirt for the Outdoor Athlete.
http://www.mesatrailgear.comOutdoor Gear Deals
We Stock A Huge Selection of Gear Weekly Deals & Free Shipping
http://www.beyondoutside.com/OutdoorGear
Oh the irony…
watch out, you’re starting to phone this shit in. by the way, when are you going to cover radiohead? please cover white people’s love of radiohead soon. it is the final block on the cultural pyramid of white people. Trust me.
White people also take dressing for outdoor activities or even just going to the gym or yoga class *very* seriously – almost more seriously than dressing for work. The looks of shock you’ll get if you go to the gym wearing regular shorts and t-shirts, rather than high-performance wicking sports yada-yada! Surely no-one can get on the StairMaster in a t-shirt or shorts that aren’t made of space-marathon-ready fabric!! And you must wear tight bicycling gear in bright yellow with various bells and whistles attached to your $500 bike when out riding on the weekend, because if you just wore regular clothes, people might think you were actually using the bike for *transportation* and not exercise, and how unwashed is that!
A propos, this is ultra-white, on so many levels:
http://www.tombihn.com/page/001/PROD/TB1112
The label it references is this one:
http://www.snopes.com/business/hidden/tombihn.asp
#33, The REI flagship store in downtown Seattle has a rock climbing wall and an outdoor mountain bike trail.
—–
I agree with some of the posters that you’re phoning this in. Take a break and work on your material. For example, instead of only referencing “The Wire” the post would have been more effective if you just talked about critically acclaimed shows. White people love em.
Do a post on CurrentTV. I don’t know who watches that who isn’t white.
All in all, you’ve been funny. Don’t mess this up.
This blog is going downhill fast. At first it was funny, but now you’re just running out of stuff. Getting more and more lame.
I agree with the anonymous # 43. I have read 90% of the blogs, and they’re starting to become trite.
Partly agree with commenters 43 and 44 but give the guy a break, it can’t be good all the time. Plus it gets harder if you’re only blogging on one subject and the format is constantly the same. Check out this blog; it’s hilarious!
http://www.fakebeastmaster.blogspot.com
I looked at the gaycondo.com blog, and I convinced the president of Iran is right about nearly everything.
I miss the days when the Italians ruled over our fashion identities.
North Face is old.
What about Thor Steiner? Now that is WHITE.
It’s a true “Nordic” fashion brand for Whites. Based in Germany, and using real nordic inspiration, including some “runes”……it sent the always whining jews into a tizzy:
http://www.thorsteinar.de/
see: http://www.thorsteinar.de/images/product_images/popup_images/1844_1.jpg
now that is White, and you’d never see a non-white copying you!
oh god, i’m wearing a patagonia performance base layer and jacket now… the jacket was bought for an undergrad study abroad trip to costa-rica.
and to the haters, this site started without much in the way of expectations, and not all the posts are meant to be side-splittingly funny – only perceptive and witty.
Loro Piana:
Germany is not a nordic country.
What is there not to like in Patagonia? 🙂
Don’t forget Lululemon! White people love paying $100 for yoga pants.
#50 Right. I never said it was.
How to confuse white people: wear your Columbia ski jacket to…grad school.
I think you need to do an entry on pinkberry. My very white friend just informed me about what this is and how it is much, much cooler than TCBY.
Also, when driving, white people love putting their turn signal on about a half mile before the turn.
I find a good set of Hip Waders comes in handy whenever I might chance to meet some White Foke.
Comes in handy when the Bullshit be getting deep.
http://www.cabelas.com/cabelas/en/templates/pod/horizontal-pod.jsp?_DARGS=/cabelas/en/common/catalog/pod-link.jsp_A&_DAV=null-cat601937_TGP&rid=&indexId=cat601937&navAction=push&masterpathid=&navCount=0&parentType=index&parentId=cat601937&id=0000596&cmCat=netcon&cm_ven=netcon&cm_cat=N/A&cm_pla=N/A&cm_ite=netcon
**********************
NOTE: SWPL is not phoning it in of late. The Wire was a catalyst for starting this site from the word ‘GO’. clander mentioned SHORTS as a future topic about 9 million hits ago on NPR.
My fair-skinned Brother is working the plan.
‘nother words Plese Bite Me.
Climbing itself would be a good entry. Secretly every whiteman wants to be conan the barbarian, running around the wilderness, cooking wild animals etc ;D This middle class job just happened to get in the way
I think this post begins to miss ‘it’… is this stuff really still distinctively white? North Face has been a white item since the days you had to have a sponsor to join the Sierra Club in the ’60s, and Patagonia evolved out of Yvonne Chounard’s climbing equipment shop in Ventura. Those were the days every self-respecting white college student (in California at least) had a North Face down jacket or vest, and wore a pair of (Usually) Vasque or Lowe hiking boots.
As far as I can tell, North Face (and to a lesser extent Patagonia and even Marmot) has become a ‘white wannabe’ brand – every other ethnic or person of color seems to sport the brands these days. It’s sort of like the way cognac or Dom Perignon lost cachet when they became known as ‘ghetto’ drinks.
Real whitebread types go for more boutique-y brands, that are usually more expensive — To show real outdoor chic, you down stuff should come from a place like Feathered Friends (probably the best sleeping bags, comforters and down clothing around) and fleece from Arctyrx or a similar brand.
And, of course, 58 name goes here is quite right about climbing being very white. How many ethnics do you see out on El Capitan? Besides, there’s so much neat gear to buy! About 20-30 years ago (and perhaps still) there was a vogue for using caribiners as key chains … if you were hip, you bought Yonne’s seconds at the shop in Ventura (and if you were really a serious climber, you climbed with his seconds — he trusted his life to them, and so could you, the flaws were cosmetic)
REI! my gosh! Hell, i know some people who have different colors to match their cars, their shorts, jeans and the weather. I can’t go on……….
Oh, so TRUE in Michigan! (but around here people really do go kayaking, camping and the like).
Personally, I’m the cheap-white-type. About 5 years ago my Dad went to China on a business trip. He picked up North Face gear for the entire family. My NF jacket and fleece were purchased for $20 USD!! Can’t beat that!
OMG!! This is soooo true, and especially so for your old pale face Americans.
How to spot a US tourist?
Tommy; Check.
Polo; Check.
North face; Check….
I’d argue that impromptu outdoor trips aren’t the main reason white people like these clothes. They like to think of themselves as high-performing warriors, and this way no force of nature will come between them and their productivity.
Finally, a post that does not apply to me! Maybe now my friends will stop thinking I’m writing this blog… or one of the writers are following me around (you’re on notice!).
North Face everywhere on everyone in Chicago!
I recently bought a columbia fleece jacket (and underarmour). I’m even whiter than I knew!
I think you’ve misnamed your blog. It should be called, “What Rich People Like.” The differences you describe fall more along economic lines than color lines, don’t you think? I’m white, yet I’m often puzzled/alienated by the behaviors you describe, too.
Out door performance wear is one of the ways that whitepeople can distinguish themselves from recent Eastern European or Asian immigrants that try to pass as whitepeople.
If you see a white person dressed like a black man, you know that they are a recent immigrant. If you see a white person dressed like a descendant Sir Edmund Hillary, you now they are real whitepeople.
You should include cross country running as something whitepeole do. when the newspapers or local media show a picture from the high school cross country meet, it looks whiter than a Klan meeting. the same for the local marathon race.
I love my Thule rack. I haven’t made use of it in about a year now.
I recently purchased a membership in the REI co-op. I wear Northface and Columbia jackets. I have a Thule hitchmount rack. I’m going camping this weekend. You have hit the nail on the head! Keep it up!
My now ex-wife one day suddenly started buying all this sort of outdoor camping stuff and jackets and boots and shit. So after all this accumulation of tents and boots and jackets and Coleman stoves I asked her if she was planning a camping trip. Of course I thought this was a little strange since she was the type who couldn’t even climb one step on a step ladder to fix a curtain. And I couldn’t recall the last time I’d seen her not wearing a gray business suit–the type worn by Kim Novak in the movie Vertigo. Well she said yes, I’m planning a trip and she put on her Patagonia fleece, claiming she was cold even though she kept the heat at 75. When are you doing this? Tomorrow, she said and I’m going by myself. Where? That’s the mystery and I need to do this. . . There’s plenty of food for you and the kids and I’ll see you Sunday. Well eventually after a year of these mysterious trips I found out she was having an affair with some mountain man who lived in the deep recesses of the Poconos. Apparently he was an old boyfriend who served 20 years in a federal pen for some anti-governmental behavior.
I must admit to being an avid fan of the north face (I guess I am pretty white) but I really do actually use it in the outdoors doing (hiking, rock climbing, skiing, kayaking, etc.). But I have noticed (in DC at least) that I see those huge puffy michellin-man down NF jackets on more blacks than whites (in XXXL of course). So it not something specific to whites any more, but still pretty funny. Once I read the top caption I knew that it described me pretty well…
Want to overdose on white people in outdoor gear…go to a small liberal arts college…
http://justlikeaunicorn.wordpress.com/2008/01/28/take-off-your-patagonia-fleece-i%e2%80%99ve-already-seen-it-three-times-this-week-or-you%e2%80%99re-boring-me-you-fuckheads/
http://westofwabansia.wordpress.com/
Oh, and Arcteryx is the new north face. More expensive and less common. (Two things white people love)
as a white person, i can say this rings completely true
i have 5 different kinds of patagonia jackets, ranging from a lightweight fleece to a synthetic outer down sweater
ohh white people…will we ever learn?
That’s white folks for you…
Friggin’ white people and their fancy garments!
Other things white peoples like:
Tunafish salad
Wireless keyboards
Bluetooth
High-speed internet access
Japanese luxury cars
Bricks
Ziplock bags
White bread
Dry-erase boards
Halogen lamps
Smooth peanut butter
Hamburger Helper
Lawns
Berber carpet
Dilbert
8 1/2 x 11 paper
Calculators
Sunglasses
Kleenex
Calvin & Hobbes
Clouds
And clearly white folks still like referring to anyone who is not a WASP as an ‘ethnic’ – with all that expensive graduate education, the meaning of the word ‘ethnicity’ has not sunk in. Tsk.
Agree with #63 on the high-performing warrior image. That might also explain why singleton WP like to buy SUVs to drive around the city in. Because they might just have to go on a desert safari soon.
Love your writing! Keep up the great work! I look forward to reading your posts everyday 😀
This is amazingly accurate. And for us browner folks, it is always a surprise how many ‘features’ and how ‘technical’ these clothes can be. Remember when you didn’t wear polyester to work out because the fabric doesn’t breathe? Well, a marketing genius convinced white people that absorbency and breathability is something you don’t want to have in your work out clothes.
I have worked in clothing stores for too many years and I like to think that I know what the difference between a $60 pair of pants and a $250 pair of pants. But with some of these tee shirts, I’m stomped.
I like to inquire about these clothes when white people wear them because their arguments in defense of these clothes are amazing. Twenty-two dollar socks? More durable. Three-hundred dollar sweater? Better materials. One-hundred dollar backpack? Gel straps and air-flo technology to keep you comfortable and with no sweat on your back.
Do you know what keeps sweat off my back? I don’t wear a freaking three-hundred dollar sweater with twenty-two dollar socks with a backpack on a warm day.
This is so true.
But, which T-Shirt category does the High Performance T-Shirt fit into?
North Face blows, To many non-whites wear it. Arc’Teryx!
Much much better. Although I think there should be a worthy mention of those horrid velcro strap sandals, eww.
What about yoga pants? White girls I know LOOOOOVE to wear their Lululemon pants all over town. May be a Canadian thing though. They also loooooove their Lululemon gym bags, though I’m seeing less of it these days.
You got it all wrong! White people don’t work when in the office, they just surf the net. The only real work is done on the golf course.
I have three high performance fleeces with the logos of different companies that I have worked at over the years. I never wear them, but for whatever reason, I keep them around.
Actually, it’s a whole other area for you to look at: Clothing and messenger bags with the company logo embossed in a prominent place.
http://joseelretardo.com
oh man! i forgot to mention those (okay, white people, LOL) who would buy all type of gear from North Face and REI and if they got a nice pay-check, they will go for Mountain Hardwear… but in any case, I have noticed that my friends (and man i love them but) they will have their closet filled with only North Face, REI and Mountain Hardwear. But they will have to buy the full line up before going to the next big thing.
But I made one big mistake, i mean big. I got one of my friends a coleman’s mummy sleeping bag! and that was so wrong. So i quickly i returned it and got a North Face sleeping bag (which was used) but my friendship was saved. Its all in the name! LOL
HAHA I laughed out loud when I read this one! I mean, the other posts have been great, but this applies to every male that I went to college with, and my husband is the biggest stereotype of them all!
Lol… what’s awesome though is when you know you fit the stereotype, and you don’t care at all – in fact, this is one “white person like” that I wouldn’t give up for anything. Our favorite time of year is when we get to spend our REI dividends… *drooool*
And yes, we always match our with our North Face fleeces or Marmot jackets on the weekends!
Whew! Good thing I went out in the rain today with a shitty old sweatshirt and got totally soaked like a moron! I’d hate to live up to some stereotype by wearing rain gear in the rain. I know what that earlier post said about Maine too, I grew up there. It’s totally true. Those arrogant turds are always wearing old jackets they’ve had from 1998. If you asked them, they’d probably say because “it’s cold”, or “if you didn’t notice, a bunch of us actually do live on muddy roads” or some crap like that. Friggin’ honkies.
I mean really, who wears outdoor clothing in situations that it wasn’t directly intended for? It’s not like a single black person has ever worn Timberland boots to a club. It’s not like someone of any ethnicity has ever worn cammo when they’re not on active army duty. It’s not like tons of the Asian kids I see around MIT wear the exact same stuff that you just described.
I mean, come on, that would be crazy…
If this is the best you can come up with, you may want to start thinking about some kind of blog finale.
Does it make you old if your outdoor performance clothing is Carharrt or Wahls? Purchased at your friendly neighbourhood Tractor Supply store.
pv-
The northface destroys lives.
and in DC a lot of black kids wear the coats, but the fleece is still a white staple.
Gotta third Arc’teryx. North Face is now an “urban” brand. They still make decent tents, but Big Agnes and Black Diamond rock WAY harder.
BTW, I hate this about white people. Us educated coloreds that ski and what not still like to dress up (because we work in the city, usually with white people). However, you can bet when we go outdoorsing with our white friends, we’ve got the best in the hi-per too.
Actually this post is not completely true. Many college girls have been moving away from the North Face Jackets and going to Mountain Hardware. I dont know if you meant Mountain Hardware when you said Mountain Equipment but most girls are wearing their Monkey Jackets now.
Hey amybug, check it:
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/22/72-study-abroad/
http://joseelretardo.com
I would not be caught dead in any sort of fleece-y “performance” gear. I proudly don’t own anything from any of the companies mentioned. Although I am white, it could be because I live in New York City or because I have an aversion to outdoor activities, especially those related to nature. (Camping? Please, that would be tantamount to torture for me.) Watching the ING Marathon, dining al fresco, or walking through Central Park to a museum are my versions of interacting with nature. lol.
Dear Clander,
I am Black. Please investigate white people’s love affair with Seattle and both Portlands, or any cold frontier for that matter.
Yes, many of these topics apply to me, but absolutely not this one. I HATE North Face shit, it’s even too white peopley for me. It’s so unflattering and common and everyone who has ever been in a fraternity or sorority has one. Ugh!!!!
My wife and I have our fair share of outdoor performance clothes. I think the only NF we have is a Denali Fleece that we got at an REI Garage sale (it had a small tear). She hates wearing it not under a shell because it is NF.
Northface jackets (the Mountian Light Jacket) were big here in MI around the mid to late 90’s. I *Hope* that skiers started it. The fleece thing is much more recent though. I have a few fleece jackets, but they rarely get worn by themselves. Fleece gets really cold when the wind starts blowing.
The whole Underarmor thing is weird. There has been wicking clothes for a long time, but athletes started wearing it and it got to be really big, and expensive.
Not Tule rack for us, Yakima all the way!!! It hasn’t been used in a few days though, snow seems to be melting, but the water hasn’t cleared for the canoe.
Until the last few posts–I guess from t-shirts on, I was starting to think that I just might be white. I thought it was odd that almost all of the posts describe me to a T and I’ve been Black for the last 27 years! Go figure. I can probbaly count on my hands which ones don’t. This blog is still ridiculously funny and a great way for me to start my work day. I’m looking forward to the next post about as much as I’m looking forward to my next expensive sandwich.
Ugh, I know. And cargo pants. And when they study abroad they always carry huge backpacks, so you’ll see an American in a non-mountainous foreign city like, say, London or Paris, and they’ll look like they’ve just climbed a mountain.
THREE WORDS:
BIRK
EN
STOCKS!
I’m laughing pretty hard as I’m wearing my North Face fleece while sitting at my desk right now.
I have a feeling that the people responding negatively to this post are currently wearing said performance gear. lol
If Shorts can make the list…so should flip flops…Flip Flops could be number 98.
you guys are clearly failures, i’m listening to you on the radio right now, GTFO the internet and fail your miserable lives elsewhere. white=skin colour and nothing more.
Let me suggest #88: Blogs.
As with all the other items on this list, this is not the sole territory of white people, but certainly rates highly on their preferred activities and interests.
hahaha, all I did was see the title “outdoor performance clothes” and I realised I’ve known it all along but this blog made me conciously realise it. Got to love them white folk. I sure do, especially in northern face jackets.
lol. Northern Europe is cold.
So, I just bought a north face jacket and a metal water bottle this weekend. You’re f-ing hilarious, very enlightened. I’m proud to read your site.
performance clothes actually make a lot of sense!
…wether on top of Mt.Everest or in a rainy and windy city!
You hit the nail on the head with the last two posts. My friends and I can almost never be seen without shorts and/or a fleece on. And I would say that we most definitely are part of the upper-middle class educated liberal elite that you are satirizing.
This means that Boulder, CO is the whitest place on the face of the planet.
I wear a North Face Jacket during the winter.
I like it and don’t care if it’s the in thing or not.
Being into the outdoor sports is called a form of exercise. It’s something you should do instead of being a poser watching white people having fun. One of my cars has a snowboard rack [you got me there][it’s must during the winter months]
I live in the east coast and everyone I see [all races] are wearing name brand fleeces and outdoor jackets. If one lives in a place that has cold winters, then one needs to wear a jacket.
Sounds like to me you’re not a white person but wish you could be. As usual the blog is amusing if not anything else…
your blogs should say what most people like [a large percentage living in the wacky world of America]
white people love making fun of other white people.
it gives them a feeling of “otherness”, which they believe makes them more authentic to any non-white. i asked my black friend edward. he agrees. please feel free to use this topic and plug: http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com
We Whites never know when our SUVs may break down out in the wilderness/tundra, so we need to know that our clothes could help us survive, yet alone look good still if we don’t.
Sounds right to me. Most white people I know wear the brands mentioned. The outdoor activities I partake in are actually with White Folk.
No one knows the outdoors like white people do.
Omg. I love this blog!! North Fleeces are a must have for all white people. This hit head on!!
Re: #111,
“No one knows the outdoors like white people do.”
I love it! Native American Indians from the past are rolling in their burial mounds!!!
The comments here are awesome.
The best are the people who try to have it both ways: they don’t want to seem like humorless, dusty liberals but they can’t help rising to the defense of whatever is being criticized.
Heard you on CBC today. This is absolutely hilarious. Love that you judge items on if you’re grad school buddies would find it cool. It’s just so stupidly correct.
You need to take all your blog entrys and publish them as a book.
@ 68
The Asian-American uniform is the black North Face fleece shown in the picture. Anyone who went to college in the Northeast will tell you that all the Asian kids sport the black (or grey and black) North Face fleece. Colors are unacceptable. And Patagonia and Columbia Sportswear are too uncool. Marmot is acceptable if you want to be different. But under no circumstances are you to be seen wearing a fleece without a logo. Generic fleeces are for, you know, those people.
North Face is an Asian thing, not a white thing. (See also, puffy black North Face jacket/vest)
Boulder was already the whitest place on earth, the face that every single person has some sort of North Face has no bearing on that.
11 million hits? This idea definitely deserves to be a book. Potentially a PhD thesis…
Sociological and Cultural Nuances of the White Man: An Exhaustive Study.
By: A White Man
I’m totally wearing a north face hoodie and north face yoga pants right now.
I can see that you are having fun with this, but you say that it’s not being racist and I can in no way see how it is not being so very prejudice. I know many many white people and none of them fit your description. I think people are comfortable being prejudice towards white people, but then how come it’s wrong to be prejudice towards black people, and people of other races???
#110 stop being so bitter.
Compiled as a book, this blog would very easily hit the best seller list within seconds and make the authors very, very rich.
‘Metal water bottles w/ screw caps’ is now an inside joke around the office.
I like all the northface and similar ‘performance’ stuff, but I buy all that crap from target and poor-man sports stores like Academy sports and outdoors.
REI is an f-ing ripoff, a tent costs like $400 there.
How embarassing. Judging by this website-I am actually White
‘ “hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.” ‘
Hilarious!!!
#127: yes-that $hit was most certainly quite funny….
Ahhh the many un-explored dimensions to this concept, though still a good one none the less!
Awesome! Living in Portland, I can confirm that this post is 100% accurate. It also perfectly describes my sister-in-law and her husband who live in Seattle.
My wife and I had a few more ideas of stuff white people like:
bumper stickers
V8 tomato juice
dressing their dogs in sweaters
the idea of public transportation
it’s SO true. white people love jogging in MEC spandex and wind/water resistant jackets with reflective taping. how do white people whitify an ancient, cultural pratice? make it trendy by developing a line of clothing and gear specifically for that practice so that white people will shell out $$ for the gear (similar in thinking to the expensive sandwiches). ah, lululemon, how ridiculous i think you are.
I took an informal class on caving recently. We were ALL white people. I think spurlunking may be able to be considered a white thing.
There were also a few GPS Geocacher’s in this caving class, I’m willing to bet that geocaching is something that is liked predominately by white people.
That Lululemon crap. White people love that. Of course, many white people love spending $150 on a pair of black yoga pants. The only problem is, they wear them grocery shopping since they can’t just wear them to yoga after paying THAT much for them.
YES! i love it! one of my closest friends is a born and raised new yorker who dresses in patagona and spends all of his free time doing ‘outdoors’y activities.’ for this i call him ‘my urban mt. man’…he is also the one who turned me onto your blog. PERFECT!
If your really gonna feed your jones for functional and cool gear you gotta check steep and cheap. I must have 7 pairs of outdoors’y sunglasses.
But seriously the material is getting weak maybe not so many posts a week….
Speaking as a white person for whom many of the entries here are uncomfortably on-target, this blog is funny as sh*t!
In fact, I think you should consider an entry for this blog itself as an example of something white people like! White people like to show that they can laugh at themselves and not take themselves too seriously, especially if a non-white person is making fun of them (e.g. Dave Chappelle and many other comics).
Also, a blog entry about this blog itself would be an example of “going meta,” which is yet another example of something white people like because it lets us feel smart and analytical and also a little bit hip and ironic and coolly detached!
anyway, thanks for the laughs!
Was bicycle gear covered in the “bike that costs more than I bring home in a week bike post”? H and I shopped for a basic bicycle for him at a local bike shop (scary places for the non-hardcore). Salesperson, who was hardcore cyclist, tried to sell us a $150 pair of cycle shorts and stressed that he himself had several pair and they were an absolute necessity. No sale on the bike or the gear.
I’m waiting for a post on:
Bob Marley
The Grateful Dead
Rocky Horror Picture Show complete with costumes and props
will you eventually post an entry entitled “Ironic Self-Deprecation”?
i suppose reaching that level on the hierarchy of irony might jump the shark, causing an implosion of whiteness and leaving the cultural equivalent of a black hole.
i find it fascinating that the people who own North Face don’t even know what THE North Face is… haha
“causing an implosion of whiteness and leaving the cultural equivalent of a black hole.”
I guess we’d have to call that a “white hole.”
is it sad that i’m wearing the same jacket in the picture right now…?
oh man, I am currently wearing shorts AND my North Face Fleece! Super White!
A lot of the Negroes I see sport North face shit too.
lol @ the phone call
It cracked me up when North Face jackets became popular with black kids a couple years ago. I don’t think I’ve ever seen something soooo white become cool for black people.
Now black people like skateboarding gear?! Cats and dogs are certainly living together!
Not only am I wearing a preformance fleece jacket, but was just thinking about what degree my tent was temperature rated… you know…. just in case someone is ready to roll. (It’s like 40 out, it could happen- today could be the day when i am called into action).
Also, I keep emergency camping gear in my trunk.
(I am so white i am blinding myself…)
This is a very Valid point!
Its always funny when I see the north face zip up and then cargo shorts with like a pair of new balance running shoes.
http://www.lullmengesha.com
The North Face brand was established in 1968, in San Francisco, California, when Douglas Tompkins and Dick “Hap” Klopp created an equipment retail store that eventually acquired the current name “The North Face. This name was chosen because the north face of a mountain in the northern hemisphere is generally the most difficult face to climb…
source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_North_Face
LOL I own none of these items, because I am not white, but i totally agree
Careful, careful, wise friends — you’ve strayed a bit from what the evasive “white people” like and into the murky what “bros” like territory. You have been warned.
It is even worse when the person/people wearing the “athletic” clothing are clearly NOT the athletic type. For instance, perhaps the 350 pound woman at the pretzel stand in the mall should admit to herself and everyone else that she is not, nor ever has been, a runner. And just because a gent is 2 axe handles wide, does not mean he should be wearing outdoor gear. Gag!
Nalgenes and carabiners. Most of the time both attached to one another. Oy.
Ok this is better than the general topic of “Shorts” but still not great, but glad to see you are getting back on track.
North Face was more of a trend when I was in boarding school in the late 90’s/early 00’s. Once the Denali came out in the version without the black nylon colorbocks (i.e. pink and grey) it was no longer the go-to brand.
College and beyond is more Patagonia (or Patagucci), Arcteryx, Mountain Hardware, Marmot, etc., in my observations.
good ups on the Thule Roof-rack. That’s classic white.
helly hansen! what!
Your next topic needs to be Duke University, duke basketball ,etc. White people love everything about Duke
Mango Girl wrote: “And clearly white folks still like referring to anyone who is not a WASP as an ‘ethnic’ ”
It’s the polite thing to do, dear. Nonwhites often don’t understand that for WASPs, the fundamental distinction isn’t “white” and “nonwhite” — it’s “people like us” (WASPs) and “everyone else”. WASPs long set the tone for white culture in the US, but are a fairly small (and shrinking) subset of white people, who are descended primarily from English settlers.
The ‘one drop’ rule doesn’t strictly apply, so a small admixture of non-English ‘acceptable’ white bloodlines (e.g. Scots, Welsh, Dutch, German, Scandinavian) doesn’t negate WASP status, but English bloodlines and cultural identity need to predominate for WASP status. That cultural identity includes having been raised in (but not necessarily believing the tenets of) an English-origin Protestant denomination, especially Episcopal, Congregational, Presbyterian, Methodist, Baptist or Quaker.
So if somneone put up a blog called “Stuff Black People Like” wouldn’t it be considered racist. Sort of like if there was a cable network called WET instead of BET.
In the Northern Hemisphere, the north face of a mountain
is generally the coldest point. A great challenge for skiing/snowboarding and climbers.
I love my North face Fleece. Stays the perfect temp for the winter. [mine is the same in the picture]
For snowboarding all one needs is a shell over-top for the powder. Name brand fleece’s or jackets are a must if you live where there is SNOW!
North Face or any other big brand maybe trendy right now but I’ve used them since the 1980’s. I like em’ either way, trendy or not. [is this a white thing???, I see EVERYBODY wearing these. White people started this trend,
but is this really a bad thing? [NO]
#151 – I agree fat people should not try to where the “outdoors” clothing. it was originally created for active/performance wear.
Well, they are practical. What is an alternative to outdoor performance clothes?
And I’m black.
white people are also not working when they’re wearing their crocs and tevas! white people also love uniformity with clothing in family, for example, the entire family wearing crocs.
The whole concept of outdoor performance gear – ranging from parkas to snowshoes – was invented by native people from the sub-Arctic regions of the world, like the Inuit and the Native Americans.
By the way, is this website some sort of a joke?
all the clothes ones are starting to get lame…
how bout one about how white people like this website? its exploding
ok…I’m black, have 3 north face jackets and a carabiner clip…uh oh
I also have receive Moosejaw catalogs
I absolutely love it! Stereotypes are fantastic. I often wonder if this blog is written by someone living in Evanston, IL. I really look forward to reading it. Keep it up.
hahahaha, you funny
Keep ’em coming, b.
http://www.flamingspinach.com
Human Being: this website is completely serious and in no way a joke.
OMG!!! I GO TO COLLEGE IN MICHIGAN AND 6 OUT OF 10 WHITE PEOPLE OWN NORTH FACE FLEECES HERE.I HAD NO IDEA
White people also like to keep the ski-tags on their performance jacket zippers for weeks after they have been skiing. It’s like a badge of honor. Plus, it’s annoying.
there was a time, before many of the white people were born, when only “alternative” white people went to north face. or rei. the demographic shifted completely.
I was told only Asians could where Northface clothing and apparel.
… I was lied to. Thanks for clearing this up for me white person blog!
I fear that you have officially jumped the shark. You are now attempting to speak to the ‘wrong kind’ of white people. What’s next, Nascar? C’mon, you are more clever than this.
they forgot tiga
Funny.
Oh so very funny.
*puts on MEC bouldering pants and goes for bike ride*
Other then my cotten T’s, all I have are polypro shirts.
I also submit that performance shirts have a lot of ‘status’ rules just like T shirts:
Brand, Color, Matchy-Matchy, sleeve pockets… actualy worn camping.
I live in Maine (and NOT in Portland, either) and there is a lot of everyday performance gear worn around. That’s because we live in a place where you really can go hiking, biking or similar in about a ten minute drive/walk from everywhere. In most Maine households that aren’t right in a downtown area, one might, at any moment, have to partake in awesomely rural outdoorsy activities, like working in your woodlot. Hehe.
Maine’s economically and physically divided into two groups: white people in Southern/coastal Maine with brand-new North Face fleeces, and white people in the rest of the state with sweet hunter’s orange. Non-white people exist generally in academia, or in Lewiston, where there is a huge Somali community.
The old jackets thing: we don’t all have New York salaries, so we tend to not have the latest thing. Also, they might get covered with deer blood.
Stereotypes!
Living in Maine is white, but summering in Maine, especially in a family compound or on an island, is really really white.
The NorthFace. I wouldn’t be caught dead at the grocery store in anything but.
#68 “Out door performance wear is one of the ways that whitepeople can distinguish themselves from recent Eastern European or Asian immigrants that try to pass as whitepeople.
If you see a white person dressed like a black man, you know that they are a recent immigrant. If you see a white person dressed like a descendant Sir Edmund Hillary, you now they are real whitepeople.”
1) Eastern Europeans are White.
2) Whites that dress like “blacks” (i.e. wiggers) are usually 4th-5th generation that have lost their way (due to black TV imagery, ESPN black-worship in sports, etc). I rarely see Polish or Irish tradesmen looking black, and Eastern European women definitely don’t sport on the black look.
#78 re: SUV’s, safari, etc.
They have merely replaced the station wagon.
It’s that simple. Don’t try to read to much into them.
FUNNY, FUNNY, FUNNY
(from a black women in and office full of white people.)
Portnoy: Eastern Europeans may be technically white, but they’re “ethnic” — connected neither by heritage or culture (or usually religion) to the Anglo-Saxon Protestants who set the tone here beginning in the 17th century.
Many high-WASP grandmothers would be as apoplectic if Muffy brought home a (random example) Romanian boyfriend as if she brought home a black boyfriend.
uh, you forgot Carhartt, for those of us white folks who need the “white people’s outdoor clothes” on steriods. 😀
#182, ‘Summering’ and/or owning a ‘compound’ (oh but hating on ‘McMansions’) is something white people like.
If the aforementioned activities occur on an island (pref. saltwater) then you’ve hit the Ivorian Trifecta.
(My apologies >white guilit< ; I’m not talking about a resident of Abdijan)
Stupid Footwear needs to be a topic. Crocs, havianais, clogs, etc.
#105 “white=skin colour and nothing more.”
Nothing could be more bogus than that statement. A albino black is nothing like a white person. I’m sorry if that offends your PC-brainwashed sensibilities but it’s true nonetheless:
see for yourself, figure out some rhetoric to deny it: http://www.cbc.ca/news/viewpoint/vp_woodward/gfx/DSC01532.jpg
YES. This post (like all of them) is DEAD ON. Love it!
http://myspace.com/clareatx
“White people will be more than happy to talk to you about their sustainably produced possessions.” Much as if they were discussing Amway, or Jenny Craig, or Mormonism – the cult of the Green.
Love it!
Re: #118 about #111,
“No one knows the outdoors like white people do.”
I love it! Native American Indians from the past are rolling in their burial mounds!!!
Whites were the explorers, navigators, invented advanced farming techniques. LOL!!! I didn’t see the indians crossing the world’ oceans, climbing Everest, going to the North Pole, mapping all the world’s continents.
Whites are the PREMIER outdoors people, the people who understand nature the most. Look at the blacks, they mostly sit around whatever city or 1-acre backwards country plot they plop their asses down in. They are probably the least in spirit with nature. Pass me the fast food!!!
If see someone out and about in the natural world, or dealing with nature, OR STUDYING IT in detail, it’s likely to be a White person, and that’s just a fact. “Indians” LOL!!!!
Kayaking, then camping…right now! Geniousss.
I love white people but I don’t know if they love me back. There seems to be a stark contrast between white people on television and white people in real life. I’m a t.v. addict/newsjunkie, I feel close to white people when I see them on t.v., almost like I am one of them but when I interact with them in real life they are not as friendly (I’m black if you don’t get it by now). Actually sometimes I feel that I am closer to whites in my reasoning and outlook on life than to my own race. I’ve always been open to an interracial relationship but white folks just ain’t giving back the love. Probably they are using stereotypes to judge me.
They wear their outdoor performance clothes with their khaki shorts.
I’m serious. They do.
Oh white people…..sigh…….
I’ve actually known a few white people who went camping…..and brought their blackberries and laptops with them!
AND they were wearing some performance gear they bought specifically for that trip!
I was so confused…!
White people (at least these guys) are ALWAYS working. What’s up with that??
#187 Cato
Yeah, yeah…..but I can guarantee you that your ancestors’ slaves sure wouldn’t have seen a Russian or Polish slave.
Save us all this high-minded Nordicism, especially since the WASPs have so thoroughly inter-bred with the Yids and Ashkenazism! Spitzer’s fine wife is an example of WASP mental sickness that pretty much started with Cromwell.
England’s declaration of war against Germany in 1939 and the UK’s subsequent acceptance of mass non-White immigration policy pretty much disqualifies WASPs from having the pulpit for determining what”White” means.
“White people (at least these guys) are ALWAYS working. What’s up with that??”
When you own the company, you’re always on call… similarly the learned professions….
White people often don’t do 9-5, but they work a lot more than people who do.
I’m learning so much here & LMBO in the process.
uhura and others:
‘THE north face’ actually refers specifically to the north face of yosemite’s half dome and not the general north faces of mountains in the northern hemisphere. hence, the half dome shaped logo on all their gear.
wikipedia will only get you so far in life. take your performance gear outside and do something with it, whitey.
I keep my thule rack on my Subaru at all times, so that when I go out on Friday nights in my Patagonia khakis and Cloudveil sweater and drink too much to drive home, I can get all dolled up in my EMS jacket, hop on my $1000 bike, and ride to where I left the car. Then I put the bike on the roof and head to Starbucks, Mos Def blaring, conspicuously clacking my bike cleats on the floor as much as possible.
But I did not go to grad school.
#195
Did it ever dawn on you that TV is not reality? People in life self-segregate, but on TV it’s faked-integration.
I love the VW commercials that show a black, an Asian, and a White all carpooling together!!! Ha ha, ever see that when you are in rush hour traffic?
Loved this topic. I sent it to some other white people who also found it funny.
Agree with #189 – stupid footwear would be a good one. However, Crocs are quite practical – great for the beach and perfect for yard-work. Wearing them to work,however, is kinda lame… but I guess if they match your fleece…. 🙂
198 Portnoy. oh, dear me. You don’t know what Miss Wall’s Southern grandmothers’ thought about young Mr. Spitzer – nor do I, but I can guess they’re doing the ‘I told her so’ two-step about now. Maybe they thought he was German….
I’m waiting for “aviator” coats and racing jackets (members only) to come back in style. Those are White genres too.
At what point will this list include “self deprecating blogs” (usually run on wordpress)?
Nice work, whoever you are.
White people convinced hip hop that North Faces were cool.
They are over priced and I am laughing at this. However, if I was outside for a weekend and all my clothes got wet, I’d be glad I paid more for material that wasn’t cotton.
I think White People as a whole like Kanye West.
I fucking love this!!!
LOL, THULE RACK on the top of their car!! I can’t tell you how many of those I’ve seen going to school in eastern Connecticut. I think, to complement this entry, you should do one about CAMPING or RV-ing. “White people like to rough it and climb rocks with equipment from REI and LL Bean.”
Poor entry. Kind of veered from the usual yuppie/hipster territory and entered the normal white person zone. Most people I know wear fleeces simply because it’s cold out, but not cold enough for a heavier winter jacket.
#203-YES I do. I live in the DC Metro Area and it’s VERY common to see a rainbow coalition ridesharing.
So-screw you.
you continue to amuse. who writes this blog?
Um here we go folks…
I’m going to start the following blog:
http://www.stuffhipstersliketheauthorsofstuffwhitepeoplelike,like.com
Anyone else game?? What might the topics be?? Here I’ll start with the obvious…
1. Satire–Exclusively.
Re: #193
Yeah Indians never crossed the Bearing Straights to Alaska as they migrated to the Americas from eastern Asia.
Try some history. White people still like unrevised history, though here in the US that’s starting to fade a bit.
I find this all very fascinating…but to be honest very little of this fits the folks (white people) that I know in LA (California that is). I think they are a tad bit different and that’s ok…the white people I read about in your blog are much more interesting.
#187:
Cato you are soooo right!!! Not all white is right!
My brother just brought home his Eastern European fiancee and my Norwegian Granny had a fit. My Mom had to spend an hour on the phone convincing her she was clean, and presentable! I thought it was hysterical and sooo old world.
LA Native … think the LA Country Club (no film people allowed for generations, except WASPs like Katherine Hepburn), Hombly Hills, old Bel Air, old Pasedena and San Marino.
“…white people like these clothes [because] it allows them to believe that at any moment they could find themselves with a Thule rack on top of their car headed to a national park. It could be 4:00 p.m. on a Saturday when they might get a call “hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.”
Though it is unlikely that they will receive this call, White people hate the idea of missing an opportunity to enjoy outdoor activities because they weren’t wearing the right clothes.”
Precisely! It allows you silly-ass white-boys to indulge your immaturity.
Such a rich fantasy life you have.
You can now go from a drooling juvenile to drooling senility with no intermediate steps all the while pretending you’re BatMan-007-Superman– anything but what you so woefully are— soft-souled, simple-minded, morally bankrupt, reality-deficient, white-punks-on-corporate-dope.
You know it’s true, bitch.
This Blog is an enabler.
It allows you all to ratify your articles of incorporation out in the open. A public bloodletting of your guilt ridden Psyches that both glorifies the vulgar excess you wallow in and assuages the pent-up guilt it facilitates.
Death to WHITEY!
I’m using satire so don’t nobody get bent outta shape about it, umKay?
219 Granny is a closet….. but is the girl Lutheran? Does she eat lutefisk? Can she make remmegrot?
I prefer the “wife beater” undershirt to a fleece any day.
Wonder Showzen did this whole rip on the habits of upper middle class white people a few years ago. Was funnier then.
$4,600 per shot hookers. That be what we really likes.
Japanese cars! We love ’em!
#197 – last summer I went on a trip to a rustic cottage in the middle of nowhere with my very white family. All three of us brought laptops, cellphones and blackberries.
you are spot on, baby. but you simply have to rock flip flops…
rj
I love how people are defending the posts of this blog when others start to find them boring. We’re supposed to find them witty instead of side-splittingly funny. I guess that goes along with the theme that white people love to show how open-minded they can be, which has been covered extensively here.
I don’t know what you are reading, but notice how the posts are becoming shorter and shorter. It’s obvious that this constant posting is wearing down somewhat on the owner of the blog. All I’m suggesting is to slow down. That’s when the better quality posts come out.
I am wearing a Columbia fleece jacket today, but only because I didn’t feel like dressing up for work.
#228 “It’s obvious that this constant posting is wearing down somewhat on the owner of the blog. All I’m suggesting is to slow down. That’s when the better quality posts come out.”
Agreed. I mean, shorts? Fleece jackets?
White people like smart wool socks
The fleece jacket is the blazer of Silicon Valley. I feel like I need to go buy one to fit in working here. Luckily there are North Face and Patagonia stores within walking distance of my house.
Ha ha ha!!! Very funny and prolific observation my friend…moral of the story; avoid those white folks and their weekend outdoor wear and SUV’s at all cost…(at least that is what I do!!)
K 🙂
you ever notice that when white people wear wool and then go out in the rain, they come back inside and smell like a wet dog?
silly wet white people.
http://www.nflthugs.com
Errrm not really check this out
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=510460&in_page_id=1770&ito=1490
#214 you are full of it!!! LOL!!! Next time snap a picture.
#219 “Norwegian granny is a bigot over (White eastern european) girl”
Hilarious, considering the Norwegians are so stupid that they are letting Oslo turn into a Third World non-white city. Norwegians aren’t as White as they think they are, and they too sided against Germany in 1940, and now look at them, if you can find them. Today, it is the eastern europeans that are the smartest and most clued-in “whites” around.
I find most of these posts pretty funning, I dare say even witty. What would be better would be some of the staples of white folk.
The biggest one that hits me in the face, like a barrage of bird shot from Dick chenys gun would be NAScar. I can’t think of a single thing that white people like more.
Unless of course it would be watching nascar and king of the hill on dual screens with dale ernheart while drinking a budweiser after some dude named cleatus just cut you a rully nice mullet.
speaking of which, what about mullets?
I just saw 2 people on 2 separate occassions this weekend wearing the fleece in the pic and figured it was some strange new trend sweeping through the YT segment, and sure enough! Here it is on your blog! I’m a trendspotter!
I just found it odd that these twenty-something girls were wearing a sporty fleece with their regular NYC preppy/hipster clothes.
This is hilarious. I love it when white people in the suburbs of NYC, which is nowhere near any truly outdoor sports, run around in performance outwear.
You have to post about the white obsession with arguing over the following bands: The Rolling Stones and The Beatles. Also How every white person likes at least 3 of the following artists: Johnny Cash, Bob Dylan, The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, Bob Marley, Jimmy Buffet, Garth Brooks. I’m sure you could add more to this list…but yeah.
Uh, actually it’s just because they keep you warm. Ever think of that one, whitey?
Funny and true in Canada. I own clothing from all the listed brands and wear them regularly.
The only one you missed was Lululemon.
You could say anything on this blog and people would love it!
Why don’t you do a post about white people who enjoy eating?
‘Omgsh, I have a white friend who eats three times a day just like you said!’
You could do a post about white people having the humility to laugh at themselves… I doubt many other ‘colours’ could take the abuse without you getting the PC brigade on your ass.
Great blog though, very original… I’ve noticed the copycats popping up already!
Two more accessories that I see daily on the trail when I walk Rover:
Huge-brimmed hats (worn on overcast days at 9 a.m.)
Older white women walking in dirt with ski poles! WTF???????
(I kid you not)
“hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now.”
Hah. awesome, I get this call ALL THE TIME!
go to http://www.buckeyebadboys.com it is so awesome
Oh and a quick note to dawn…
Johnny Cash, Bob Dylan, The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, Bob Marley, Jimmy Buffet, Garth Brooks.
The above have sold about 500 million records between them, I think you’d find that universally people from most races could pick 3 of those they like. Thats why its called popular music…
Why don’t you just take the top 10 films of all time and say white people will like at least three of them?
Its not a bad thing is it?
Idiot.
#217 they migrated across a land bridge. That hardly compares to Whites’ mastery of the outdoors etc. Liberals are so stupid when it comes to history.
#245 “Older white women walking in dirt with ski poles! WTF?”
Woman?, Walking?, In Dirt?, With Ski Poles? And They’re White? You’re correct to be asking WTF, shouldn’t they be cleaning up after breakfast, watching soap operas or food shopping or something?
#77 Ziplock! Of course!! that is genious. Every person who threw their leftover pizza in a ziplock I’ve known was white. Conversely, chinese & filipinos i’ve known are the least ziplock using race.
How about I make a blog called “stuff black people like” or “stuff mexicans like”.
This guy is nothing but a racist idiot. These aren’t things white people like… Im 100% Irish and I don’t like any of this stuff.
i’m wearing my performance clothing right now…
Here is a screen shot of Stuff White People Like being featured on the frontpage of Yahoo:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080312/ap_en_re/on_the_net
Cheers!
Hilarious. It’s true, so many people I know (I was raised White and out of sheer laziness I still have mostly White habits and tastes, so of course most of my friends are White) hate to talk about work when they are not working. WTF?
I think the thing about hoping to get whisked off to some white-water kayaking at 4 in the afternoon on a Saturday is accurate. But also, wearing the sports gear for an afternoon stroll is about knowing you have the BEST POSSIBLE TECHNOLOGY to cushion you from the elements. ‘cuz you never know, it might suddenly rain, or get a bit windy, and you might be uncomfortable and have to pay attention to your physical environment, and that would suck.
BTW, all you folks getting pissed off, this blog is SATIRE. And it is satirizing the kind of people who most deserve to be satirized – people who, if they don’t exactly call the shots, still benefit from most forms of social privilege and who lack any ironic self-awareness because the world is made in their image.
ha ha, i always laugh and ask myslef, “Why?” especially bikers… i mean, get out of here!
I went to an all white school district (1 thru 12) not that it or I was special; it was only white folks lived in the City. I am not old and mean, but each person deserves to live among his kind. Things happen, my father an ancient and well educated man, similiar to the elder Bush
(GHW Bush) told me and my brothers. If mankind kept marrying darkies; mankind would stop being white, and become coloured. The longer I live; that man becomes more intellegent.
thank you for listening
Padre
Enough about clothes. Let’s turn to nudism. Nothing is whiter.
This is a bad post. It seems like you are already changing your content to fit your audience. Yes, white people do wear North Face and the like, because it is a mainstream trend (aka obvious). The audience you were targeting initially in this blog doesn’t wear North Face, as no intelligent, liberal, “hip” person would be caught dead wearing something that everyone else does.
At this pace, I expect to see Nascar, Flip Flops with jeans, Floral Boardshorts, and movies based on comics coming up soon on the list. (Please note, these are all obvious mainstream trends, and would not be considered clever or witty).
Please go back to posting things that people that set trends like and how it makes them feel empowered. Thanks.
When I was a 27 year-old, living in mid-town Manhattan and working in an ad agency, there were people all about me, just starting to notice a certain sort of private vehicle that had big engines, big tires, clunky, weekend dirt-driveway cars. Land Rover wannabes.
[Before that, there was just the Ford Country Squires (we had one – 1963) with pretend wooden panels and little horse heads.]
So, some of the people who bought this new breed of car did not actually own a weekend home with a dirt driveway. Or else it was not their weekend at the Sag Harbor summer rental. But they took the car out of the garage anyway.
Here’s my point: there was aerosol mud. A suspension of, I guess, garden soil in a can. One simply sprayed this around the wheel wells in artistic splashy patterns and BINGO. For all the world, you had been driving back from that dirt-driveway weekend place when you pulled up in front of Dorians Red Hand for a night cap. If that sounds nutz..stay right where you are.
Upon purchasing a new Harris Tweed sports jacket, one put bricks in the pocket, hung the thing on a hanger out behind the dorms and sprayed it with a hose. Real men took a file to the elbows, but that was actually considered ‘over-doing-it.’
Now jump with me back to real time …. clothes to make us look hardy and more capable in the nature walk deal than we really are? Please, who doesn’t get that?
There are a few who say Patagonia will last for 20 years and it’s a reasonable way to spend money. Okay, I say that. I bought my last expensive shit for nature walks before the kids were born so it’s about 25 years ago. I still have a pair of suntan walking shorts (not cargo) and they are not more worn out than newer, lesser brands. But really, I only bought them because they were expensive and I had somebody with me when I was shopping so I HAD to buy them. Anybody not understand what I just wrote?
I’m not saying it’s not really neurotic. But it is the way things are. For white people.
Warm personal regards,
Digbyy
Mo (#232) must live in Palo Alto.
I was waiting for this one too…it is about even more than being ready for camping (I don’t go camping often…but I COULD go at a moment’s notice, if I needed to. It’s the same reason young white professionals live in cities. “Why do you live in The City?” “Because of all the fabulous cultural opportunities.” “Do you go to the theater/restaurants/museums/concerts often?” “Well no, but I COULD if I wanted to.”). It’s about being able to go camping at a moment’s notice AND be able to weather the most bone-chilling Arctic storm possible, even if we’re just talking about Tahoe in early November. Is it likely that conditions in Tahoe will resemble conditions in an Antarctic winter, or at Camp IV on Everest? No, but the important thing is that the clothes/equipment are engineered to keep you toasty at those temps, even if it is near impossible that you will encounter those conditions. BE PREPARED. White people are basically all Boy Scouts at heart.
#258
Everyone hates critics. Go create something on your own a-hole. See if you can do better.
San Francisco “The City” is the most overrated “cultural” city there is. Yeah there’s the symphony and the opera, but the rest of it is gay-oriented and mostly devoid of actual culture, theater, art, etc.
trips to Mt. Tam don’t require North Face gear especially when you drive there.
“I keep my thule rack on my Subaru at all times, so that when I go out on Friday nights in my Patagonia khakis and Cloudveil sweater and drink too much to drive home, I can get all dolled up in my EMS jacket, hop on my $1000 bike, and ride to where I left the car. Then I put the bike on the roof and head to Starbucks, Mos Def blaring, conspicuously clacking my bike cleats on the floor as much as possible.
But I did not go to grad school.”
Ahh, springtime in Denver.
I did go to grad school too!
Ahh yes, such a horrid thing to be critical. Everyone should never question anything, right? This blog was genius for awhile, but now appears to be losing its cleverness. If it keeps it up, yeah I could probably do a better one. However, it would be extremely unlikely that it would ever achieve such mainstream appeal that this did. And I’m going to hypothesize that in your eyes, mainstream appeal means better.
#252
If you stay in this judaicized country long enough, marry a non-Irish person, you can assured that either your children or grandchildren will end up like so many weasel Whites (NPR-types, etc.) this blog satirizes. Just give it time buddy.
“Run to hills/Run for your life”/
as white people discover another’s land and bring strife./
But, “dude it’s also an Iron Maiden classic”/
as well as a trendy lifestyle/that’s “Fantastic,”/
only for those white people who can afford/
to get the hell out of dodge or because they are bored./
“Oh Lord!”/White people love their/
‘expensive for no reason’ outdoor gear/
and its a good thing, cause when the apocalypse/
actually hits/
white people will be stylishly dressed and fit/
to survive/
the long drive/
to get away from their loved ones/
so they don’t have to share/any of their/
water, food, shelter, gear, or funds.
The must-have car to be seen in such outfits is definitely the Subaru.
OMG I just saw a Prius with an Apple Sticker, personalized plates, and one of those Euro oval stickers. SO WHITE! Love it!
This one’s a winner.
“What’s that thing holding your keys to your shorts?”
Lol’d.
Relatives who cannot be away from Crackberry, laptop, etc, i.e. work trappings, while on any family vacation, as if in competition to show who is more a martyr about their “career.” They wear it on their sleave…..
Guess what? White people like the blog “Stuff White People Like.” Pretty soon, it won’t be “cool” any more….
You nailed this one. Are you from Canada?
A lot of North Face stuff is made in Sri Lanka that has one of the worst human rights records on the planet.
“Gardening” might be another thing that white people like. Asians do it, but they plant food, not flowers and grass. In Cleveland’s very small China town, most of the Chinese plant their whole yards with vegetables.
Apparently, I am the quintessential white person. This post made me finally admit that to myself.
I refuse to buy one of those stupid North Face jackets though…just because everybody has them now. They are cool no longer.
The “Thule” rack on top of the car headed to a “National Park” was the best part by far!!! Right on!!!
I searched the website and found no entry for horses. You have to do an entry on horses! White chicks LOVE horses.
#273: ““Gardening” might be another thing that white people like. Asians do it, but they plant food, not flowers and grass. In Cleveland’s very small China town, most of the Chinese plant their whole yards with vegetables.”
What an odd comment. Ever hear of Japanese gardens? No? here are some photos:
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=japanese+gardens&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wi
Type in Chinese Gardens, see what you get.
Hmmm….but what about white people that have jobs like “scientist”, where they dress the same all the time, everyday. Day, after day, after day, after day, after day, aft…sorry.
I read this while wearing my black North Face fleece jacket at work.
Awesome.
LA Native,
I think that you need to visit Santa Monica where there are a ton of wp’s (locals, i.e.) Not only can you go to the farmer’s market and then walk to an REI, you can then go to the beach and windsurf or grab your bike/get in your car and go hiking lickity split. Oh, and you can easily find a Whole foods, grab a beer at an Irish pub (that reminds you of study abroad), purchase fair trade coffee, and claim to live in an open minded community thanks to all the homeless services.
#273:” ““Gardening” might be another thing that white people like. Asians do it, but they plant food, not flowers and grass. In Cleveland’s very small China town, most of the Chinese plant their whole yards with vegetables.”
What an odd comment. Ever hear of Japanese gardens? No? here are some photos:
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=japanese+gardens&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wi
Type in Chinese Gardens, see what you get.”
True that. All I know is Chinese and Thai people, not so many Japanese people in my part of Cleveland.
Also, I suggested gardening as a topic… I said “might.”
I know a few black people who garden, mostly older.
Ha, you nailed me in this one about like you’ve nailed me on most of the posts. I read thee post wearing a REI t-shirt, patagonia underwear, smartwool socks, and some North Face pants. Of course, I did just go cross country skiing. Oh and I’m drinking out of a metal water bottle too.
#277 TJ, on #273: “What an odd comment. Ever hear of Japanese gardens?”
Of course. But Japanese are “honorary whites”. Just ask an old South African.
This is great. The moment I clicked on this (it’s on my mozilla dashboard), I had just purchased a Marmot jacket for my sister’s birthday present from REI.com
I live in Eugene, OR. and this kind of stuff is really Eugene-Chic. It’s a town made up of mostly white people who are SUV-driving hippies.
#277 #”273: ““Gardening” might be another thing that white people like. Asians do it.”
Ever notice that the neighborhoods and houses of Hispanics (who work full-time as gardeners and handy-men in White culture) always have the most unkempt streets, houses, and landscaping?
It boggles the mind. I guess they need direction from Whites to do perform these trades.
in Seattle, outdoor clothing doubles as work clothing. getting lattes can turn into an outdoor adventure in our rain. keens run amok and double as work shoes, oh my!
Add to SWPL:
1- Naming their sons, “Todd;” he is typically a spoiled kid who thinks he’s better than you and that he’s a victim of Affirmative Action
2- Using “douchebag” to describe people they don’t like
3- air quotes, thumbs up signs, ‘shooting’ people with their fingers …well, hand gestures in general
4- the Boy/Girl Scouts
5- believing in the underdog
Your blog is hilarious. Even “shorts” as a topic. Keep it comin’!
High-performance? What exactly makes a fleece high-performance? If you wear it, are you (1) invisible or (2) more likely to get away with s**t you couldn’t before or (3) less suspicious to the TSA at the airport?
Or are you just, like, warmer?
All I know is that my husband thinks his friend’s North Face jacket (probably the same one Matt, #279, is wearing) is amazing. He says that John “always looks comfortable” in it. He was the same way with the man’s digital camera. Boys are just like girls — only without purses. But if John had a really great North Face man bag, I’m sure my guy would want one too.
I’m all, Whatever! It’s not even vintage!!
A salesperson in an expensive outdoor gear store once showed me a vest that was basically a piece of black fleece with net pockets, explaining that the $270 price tag was because the vest was “highly technical”
I think it was ARC’TERYX
“with various bells and whistles attached to your $500 bike”
Horrors! No self-respecting White Cycling-American would be caught dead on a $500 bike–that’s more like the price of a wheel. When I ride with the Cool Kids–on a bike worth well north of a grand–I’m a poor relation. Only my up-to-the-minute performance gear lets me hold my head up in public.
To:
“285 Portnoy’s complaint
#277 #”273: ““Gardening” might be another thing that white people like. Asians do it.”
Ever notice that the neighborhoods and houses of Hispanics (who work full-time as gardeners and handy-men in White culture) always have the most unkempt streets, houses, and landscaping?
It boggles the mind. I guess they need direction from Whites to do perform these trades.”
I live on the East side of Cleveland, so there aren’t a lot of hispanics.
The Hispanics all live on the West side. It’s cheaper. And white people like them better than blacks, at least in Cleveland.
I’d love a Cleveland version of “The Wire.” That shit would be tripped.
Can you guess my race and gender from my comments?
Seriously.
Dude, I’m white and I don’t like any of the stuff in this blog.
gross.
this is SO an upper-class suburban thing
Dude, then you are another other type of white!!!!!!
I’ll break it down into 3 stereotypical whites:
1) Suburban/city whites who are liberal and “educated” and listen to NPR. And who suffer from white guilt. Easy targets, especially of this blog.
2) Some rural, though there’s still a WalMart ’round the way, “fuck you”, “thank you, Ma’am” Nascar type of whites who you (read: people of color) tread carefully around.
3) Somewhere in between? Aren’t most of us all?
-J.
Hi,
I’m is a Balinese and I just know the white man culture (related to clothes), because I don’t see any differences between the people in your article and myself. Sometimes I work using gadget and use the formal clothes at the office, then talked about personal life with friends (that’s Indonesian culture). But on the weekend, I always use sport wear.North Face or O’neil are so nice.. It showed that I’m not working on the weekend 🙂 (in another word, I wanna enjoy my holiday)
nc to read your article..
-Putu-
you know, given my prior-affirmed love for marathons, bottles of water, and shorts, I think it’s only fair that I use Under Armour to complete the disgusting ensemble of pseudo-wealth.
295 Luhtu:
Indonesia, you have no idea about American culture.
It’s more simple and complex than practicalities.
I’m sure you have your own examples, in Indonesian culure.
Why do you do so and so? Sometimes it’s for some long gone and esoteric reason….
Thanks,
J.
#291 re: Cleveland East Side, trying not to threadjack,
since we’re talking about clothes, but take a look in the mirror: http://www.stormfront.org/forum/showthread.php?t=453058&highlight=shaker
“For now, I think we’ll stay put,” Mrs. McDermott said, just before driving to visit her husband in the hospital. “After that, I can’t say. We “love the diversity here”. But we have to weigh that against our safety.” LOL!!!
Don’t forget about the pit zips. It’s always about the pit zips.
And by the way, it’s THE North Face. The folks over at REI scolded me soundly for that little boo boo.
No shit, Anonymous!!!!!
I live very close to where that happened.
Cleveland is f*cked, and I still love it.
The suburbs of Cleveland are f’ed, and I still love them.
I gots love for all my people, black and white (and everyone else, blah blah, PC bullshit…), who won’t leave and try to stick it out.
That’s why I love this website. All the pussy whites described are moving to Seattle,Portland, San Fran,…
They can’t deal with the reality of the “passover” states and cities.
Yet we legislate according to their whims because they own some vacation propery in our parts.
God save us.
-J.
@ Stuffkatherinelikes:
I can’t imagine being prepared for spontaneous snowboarding whenever im not working… painful >_>
Fabulous! I noticed a gal earlier at the coffee shop wearing her outdoor performance jacket and using her laptop to check her MySpace account… Looking busy, but ready to go hiking at any given moment. 😉
Why is that couple walking toward a red Klan hood?
you totally forgot under armour — silly rabbit
I remember going over to The North Face factory in Berkeley to get a Superlight when they came out in 1969 … great sleeping bag that I hiked all over the Sierras and traveled around the country with ’til some jerk in the Hamptons ripped it off…. too bad.
ummm… i actually live in a place where clothes like this are a necessity (montana).
rei is also a tradition in my family — my dad has been a member for 35+ years — we actually DO stuff outdoors.
What a bunch of racist garbage. Waste of my time clicking the link to this site.
LMBO…
this blog reminds me of the old Lincoln Park Trixie website.
stuffselfloathing20somethingsforcethemselvestonotlike.wordpress.com
These clothes help show that the White People play in the outdoors as opposed to making a living out there.
For cowboys, loggers, prospectors, and fishermen, fleece and Gore-Tex won’t hold up to the constant abuse. And that’s why you can’t buy quality brands like Fillson at REI.
#305 “til some jerk in the Hamptons ripped it off”
LOL
i just wear it cause it makes me look cool…and like a hardcore outdoor chick. a good facade for any guys checking me out 🙂
I want a Thule rack, like, bad.
i think the fleece jacket is one of the ugliest piece of clothing.
except maybe denim vests. now that’s foul.
Stuff Asian people like:
Being skittish
Not allowing others to get off public transportation before piling on
Being afraid of being the last person in line
Squinting
Crashing cars
Math
Getting freakishly and embarassingly angry about stupid things (predominantly men, also applies to Indian people)
Blurring out pubic hair in pornography
Ugly fashion
hahah, i’m white and i LOVE my north faces
This one is really funny. It’s hard to tell if the author is some bitter bagger at the super market or a true comedian. It’s my favourite blog. It should be titled “White American”.
In Europe, the rules are different and based less on race but class. Example: A Chav (council housing and violence) is a low class white or multi-racial person and wears fake gold chains and Burberry hats. You will find one with a Julie/orange lollypop under their arm. Usually a Chav will have several siblings of different races. YOBs (boy backwards) are closely related except they tend to wear football shirts and have shaved heads.
Now we move onto the Pikey. A Pikey lives in a camper and makes a living off stealing from others and could be of white or romany ancestry.
A Posh or Sloane is an upper class member of white or multiracial ancestry and have an education from Cambridge or Oxford. They usually weekend in the countryside and do country things like, hunt, hike, play polo and ride horses. They have flats around Sloane Sq. in London and are famous for driving Chelsea Tractors( big SUVs) with a Starbucks in hand.
An Eco-Sloane will drive a Smart car or some other eco-car and are usually anti-hunting and run charities for some cause in Africa.
A Turbo-Sloane works and works hard in publishing or some other high paying job. They usually go clubbing on weekends in London and go to clubs in Abercrombie & Fitch or Jack Wills attire and mingle with minor European and Middle Eastern royals. They are known for driving Astons or super cars and might have a yacht in Greece to weekend on. It’s a bit more grey and diverse over here in Europe.
Are “bitter bagger” and “true comedian” mutually exclusive? I think not.
um you forgot Patagonia and mountain hardware. Mountain hardware has authenticity cause people who climb actual mountains use it, and patagonia recycles their organic cotton clothing and makes their fleece out of recycled plastics, white people love that shit.
Someday you guys better vote in the BNP, sooner rather than later!
my friend says that something white girls like is dating black guys. is that true ?
How soon will Nigel have to change his name so as not to offend his new neighbors?
As a black girl living in Vermont who wears her North Face to WORK, I have to say, yet another stellar entry about white folks.
The BNP is on par with the centre right in Amurica. Pretty sad they have been running the show in the US. New Labour and the Tories would be considered socialist or some demonic big government in the US.
323. The PC rubbish is more much more active here in the UK than the US.
Dang man. I just found this website, started with #87 and man, this is me to a ‘T’. funny funny stuff. 🙂
Keep ti up!
319. They can be exclusive or inclusive, it’s how you perceive it. You can be a wanker and a tosser but you can also be just a wanker.
#325 “The BNP is on par with the centre right in Amurica.”
The BNP are neocons? Who’da thunk it?
#326 “The PC rubbish is more much more active here in the UK than the US.”
Wasn’t so long ago you would mock us for being so prissy. And you had characters like Mrs Nigelbaiter on Monty Python, and words like “nigel-nogs” on Ripping Yarns.
Excellent list. This is a true ethnography of the North American descendants of typically low-class Euro-Caucasoidal immigrants.
If I may humbly make a submission to your blog of stuffwhitepeoplelike:
– Multi-Grain Bread –
White people always love multi-grain bread, up and to including the bread having whole (visible) sunflower seads in the bread.
This affair might be the over-reactive results of the brainwashing done by their parents pushing whole wheat bread on them their entire lives and berating them with lectures of fiber and good continence. As well, this subconscious drive is mixed with the attraction of being a person who eats granola (and therefore they are “granola” – see outdoors, performance clothing, organic food, shorts, and traveling [of the 3rd world kind]). Its consumption is commonly enthusiastically justified by repetition of the urban legend (see “Irony”) that the common bread ingredient bleached white flour is what Elmers brand glue is made from which, once eaten, adheres itself to the intestinal wall almost permanently (also related to ‘professional colon cleansing’ – an act unique to white people). The real irony of the attraction to the bread that appears to be loaded with birdseed is that typically the main ingredient is bleached white flower with the end result of being about 1% healthier than Rainbow thin-sliced bread. Never bring this to their attention as that it will humiliate them through exposing the fact that they have never actually read the ingredient list on the sack. All possibility of future friendship with said white person would be lost if you were to burst the bubble and they were to realize that the only real difference between their bread and the storebrand $0.69 white bread is a factor of 8 in the price.
It is believed that white people may suspect this, but they are too busy enjoying a self-righteous sandwich to do the research.
See also ‘Expensive Sandwiches”
Other things white people like:
Expensive things
White people think “more expensive equals better”… which should be stated, “having more expensive stuff equals better than”
– Louis Vuitton purses – need I say more?
see also any item in this list that would be purchased.
Urban Legend
– they know they are probably not true, but they continue to relay the story, with the subject permanently being just 3 degrees from the story teller (“this happened to a friend of a friend”)
– commonly related to Irony.
Long term capital gains
White children are educated in the value of long term capital gains in the 4th or th grade.
Googling their name on the internet.
Don’t mess with Ripping Yarns, mate!
My year-end dividend at REI is $28.44!!! That, coupled with a 20% discount makes me tremble!!
Clogs; I NEED clogs, but what ever happened to the Merrel’s clogs that were made of Gore-Tex!?!?
A homeless guy made off with them when they were outside my front door (no shoes allowed indoors), and I haven’t been able to score another pair 😦
The great things about clogs is that they give the impression that you’ve already BEEN somewhere, and that you are giving your trekked feet a well-deserved rest.
American Whites could only dream of having a party like the BNP, and a real person like Nick Griffin.
Our “conservative” candidate, mcCain, supports open borders!!! He’s more of an idiot than Bush, who also supports liberals. I don’t why the anti-whites hate Bush, Bush helps them more than he does whites.
I really love this blog!! Later mates
I love this blog, and I’m black. About four-fifths of this applies to me. I will say, outdoor performance-wear is definitely a white thing. As are shorts during winter.
What I really love, though, are the racist guys who wander over here, thinking this blog will be about them, then are totally alienated, not realizing that the blog is really about the affinities of hyper-educated Coastal liberal elites–of any color…
Any upper-class American living in a hip urban area will like these things, but what makes white people like these things beyond their initial value has to do with the spin of self-referentiality, the need to quantify, the need to feel empowered by “empowering,” and, of course, that warm feeling of smugness.
That said, I can’t believe you don’t have:
1) Baby Accoutrement: Bugaboo, Maclaren, and Phil and Ted, Peg Perego and Inglesina strollers. Having babies is serious business for white people. But having the right stroller is a bit more serious.
2) Nannies: Everyone else calls them babysitters.
3) Breastfeeding: White people love to tell everyone else why they should be breastfeeding. Even guys get in on the act.
4) The New Yorker: For those who know, I don’t have to say more…
5) Keith Olbermann/Hating Bill O’Reilly, Ann Coulter et al.
6) Use of “et al,” “qua” “ad hominem” etc…
A
#335 What I really love are blacks that try and act white. What are you the female Bryant Gumbel?
Is your favorite movie “Something New”?
#335 “Having babies is serious business for white people.”
I wish your people would take it a little more seriously. 70% illegitimacy rate and your yapping?
What’s that smell?
re: “but they hate talking about their work life when they are enjoying a weekend or vacation.”
In fact, this statement right there ↑↑ couldn’t possibly be further from ‘the Truth’. 🙂
http://khandorssportsblog.wordpress.com
I don’t really understand how anyone can be proud of their race, white or otherwise.
what about “high class call girls” instead of plain ol hookers.
In the year 2008, I fail to understand how it is that anyone can truly believe s/he is a member of a specific ‘Race’ … other than the only one that matters, i.e. Human.
Except in this limited context, the term ‘Race’ no longer has a valid meaning in the modern world.
http://khandorssportsblog.wordpress.com
Kiwi —
I’m adding to your “how to spot an American tourist” list:
Tapered jeans. Check.
Hawaiian shirt. Check.
Darted Khaki shorts/pants. Check.
Super loud voices. Check.
Speaking English to locals in a non-English-speaking country. Check.
I really hate those fleeces. What about those Tevas? (The flip flop’s adventurous/off-roading cousin.)
I’m Californian — how ’bout picking on our penchant for wearing flip-flops 24/7? I’m certainly guilty! (I’ll wear them in the rain!)
“Tevas (The flip flop’s adventurous/off-roading cousin)”
LMAO! So THAT’s what those are all about. Thank you for explaining that. I wish this blog had been around when I went off to a blindingly white college, it would have explained SO much.
With SUVs, though, the reasoning seems to shift between “adventurous off-roading image” and “we need it for the kids” (even though studies show that SUVs are actually not any safer for children in car seats). But most SUVs I’ve seen in the US seem to be driven by folks without kids in the back.
Note that when WP turn into expats or rent a car in an exotic country (i.e. countries outside Europe – they’ll take the metro in Paris) the 4X4/SUV is absolutely de rigueur, even if it’s impractical on crowded third-world city streets. I think it helps them feel protected from the mean, dirty streets. And they *are* on an adventure.
hey #338, aka “Anonymous”
“My people” do take having babies seriously. “My people” are the people who live on the coasts and vote for Democrat and who will care about education. And I can assure you my kids look better and act better and are smarter than yours, just by the stupidity of your post.
hey, #336 also “Anonymous”
You love blacks “acting white?” Hmmm. I thought you loved blacks eating watermelon and having babies and stealing your wallet. Go wander around the NASCAR track with #338. I don’t think you understand the point of this blog. Look up “Irony.” You’re white, right? You should get it….but you don’t.
hey #338, aka “Anonymous”
“My people” do take having babies seriously. “My people” are the people who live on the coasts, vote Democrat, and care about education. And I can assure you my kids look better and act better and are smarter than yours, just by the stupidity of your post.
hey, #336 also “Anonymous”
You love blacks “acting white?” Hmmm. I thought you loved blacks eating watermelon and having babies and stealing your wallet. Go wander around the NASCAR track with #338. I don’t think you understand the point of this blog. Look up “Irony.” You’re white, right? You should get it….but you don’t.
#335 Groovelady: The New Yorker is such a cliche that it is a counterindication of upper class status — an almost guarantee that the reader is (at best) upper middle class or a middle class ‘upper middle class wannabe’.
i love the fact that white people go to church in north face polar fleece. It shows that you almost certainly have money and an education, but zero class.
To #304–I think Under Armour is more “black” than “white.” I live in NYC and I think black kids used to wear the North Face alot but I seem to see less of that. I wonder if it’s because white people in urban areas started wearing it and made it uncool. But Columbia, Patagonia, LL Bean, etc. are spot on. As for me, I like Nike for performance wear (which I wear only when actually performing, e.g., jogging.) I was going to say Nike’s white, but that’s not true–every race wears Nike. They’re one of the few brands that appeal to just about everyone: men, women, whites, blacks, asians, etc.
#348 “#335 Groovelady: The New Yorker is such a cliche that it is a counterindication of upper class status — an almost guarantee that the reader is (at best) upper middle class or a middle class ‘upper middle class wannabe’.”
The generalizations, stereotypes and know-it-allness that come up in the comment are what makes this blog worth reading.
Correct Grammar
White people love grammar. Efforts to ridicule white people are less effective if not written with proper punctuation and correct spelling. This whitey recommends “The Elements of Style” by William Strunk, Jr. as a good reference for improving your written communication.
white lesbians are particularly fond of outdoor wear
Love that all the Flickr photos from authors are all of WHITE PEOPLE (or food). Idea for post: white people love taking photos of food.
351 – JT. The description of a New Yorker reader as “hopelessly middle class” is from sociologist Paul Fussell’s 1983 book CLASS, which charmingly anticipates this blog in many respects, although it is dated in many respects.
Students of class and its indicators — which as many people have pointed out is what this blog is about — should consult any good 19th century British novel of manners (e.g. Disraeli or Trollope) and Henry James novels for deep background, perhaps some Evelyn Waugh for the first half of the 20th century, and then Jessica Mitford’s NOBLESSE OBLIGE, and A.S.C. Ross’ WHAT ARE U?, both of which deal with the British upper class, but are insightful and give the careful observer of the American upper and upper-middle classes much food for thought.
Rare indeed is the student at an elite university or college since 1962 who was not exposed to Strunk & White in freshman English, if not ealier in prep school.
Enjoy your white guilt.
true true true true true!!
i do love my north face, though.
white girl college staple; long black north face jacket, leggings, ugg boots, vera bradley aka quilt on your shoulder
white guy college staple; north face fleece, pervy aviators or soooo outdated oakleys, ripped jeans and flip flops (thank god it’s finally nice out!)
alo of this shit goes for people in general
this is so a west coast thing (perhaps new england too). new yorkers aren’t caught dead in this shit unless they’re really in the outdoors. don’t wear running shoes unless we’re running either. i’m originally from the left coast, and this lack of fashion sense amuses me.
White people love aljazeera.net
OMG that s@$# is tooo funny!!
The North Face jacket = THE official uniform of the University of Michigan.
(Columbia can be used in a pinch, anything else is unacceptable)
Shouldn’t this blog be named, “You Might NOT Be A Redneck If You Like…”
I agree with others: this is more of a right-wing, populist (anti-intellectual) slam on progressives than commentary on whites.
I know some people have also mentioned them, but the true status symbol brands are Mountain Hardware, Patagonia, and Arc’teryx. North Face is less acceptable because every high school girl has a black NF fleece (tying in to #83). These brands also alert others that they can afford a $400 jacket made from what is essentially recycled water bottles (#s 64 and 76). Brands change frequently (what happened to Helly Hanson), and keeping up (making) certain marks trendy is a power white people relish.
I think this blog is too stereotypical and I’m not white. It is offensive and no I’m not married or dating a white person, I’m just telling it like it is.
My favorite pic of all time was of Mark Zuckerburg (facebook founder) and his girlfriend going to dinner wearing matching Northface fleeces.
Oddly enough the couple was in L.A. going to Mr. Chow. Northface definitely takes a white person from daywear to evening easily. Especially in the artic temps of L.A.
I like Columbia Sports Wear!
http://www.5millionpageviews.com
It’s pathetic. Clander thinks all white guys are into Trucks, Nascar, and country music, you’re way off.
I hate all of these things. When traveling the United Kingdom I found out what real music and clothing was. Most clothing designs are from Europe and Italy.
This topic is extremely incorrect: I’ve been lucky enough to travel outside the USA and everyone I see is wearing some type of designer Fleece or jacket. If one like “North Face” then go for it. If this is a trend It won’t be going away anytime soon. If you live where there is WINTER, people will always wear fleeces and coats. [dumbass]
I guess you got lucky with this blog. I happen to be into Skiing and Snowboarding. Yes I have North Face clothing and have a Thule rack on one of my cars. I use it, and if one lives near SKI resorts like I do, it’s a must have…..
[I’m guessing you don’t do any kind of outdoors/winter sports???]
I love this blog, particularly the way it makes it painfully clear that “white” = American. Coming from a place where “Voss” water comes out of the tap, the weather is rough enough that you have to wear sportswear to get to work without frost damage, and “layering” is something you grandmother insists that you do so you have a chance to avoid a urinary tract infection – not to mention where just about everybody speak 2-3 different languages or nobody but their closest neighbours will understand them – it makes me feel both painfully white, but also painfully foreign to this whiteness.
Luckily, we keep getting the exemptions, like noting that Europeans actually ARE into soccer. Well, we call it football. Also there should be an exemption about the sportswear. Europeans dress up after work, if they are going somewhere, Americans dress down. This means you are likely to meet a European person on the way to work in his fleece jacket, only to meet him out on town in an elegant coat and some snappy shoes after work. There should be warning for American men dating European women: do not get into your casual wear if you have invited her out to dinner! She’ll come dressed to kill – and if you’re not dressed for it, she’ll just leave your carcass in the gutter.
Ahhh! This is SOOOO TRUE! It’s standard white people wear. I went to college in the south, and I considered getting a North Face coat to fit in with all the students. (I’m not white btw). However, after going to the store, I realized that these coats are…ugly. I went to Banana Republic and got a trendy long black coat instead. Please, I want a warm coat, but I don’t want to look like a man when I’m wearing one either!!
P.S, there should be an article about rainbow sandals, Uggs, and crocs here; all are comfortable (like North Face), white Americans love them, and they are UGLY.
right on
This is getting rediculous… this weekend I was thinking that two things white people like are “shorts” and “North Face gear”. Seriously, this guy has some crazy insight into my brain, yet he’s more humorous!
Columbia should be removed. Columbia and Timberland are for poor whites, plus blacks. This website is mostly about middle- to upper-class whites. Instead they should list Campmor and LL Bean as outdoor gear whites like. Maybe Eddie Bauer too.
T-shirts, shorts and now outdoor performance clothing…I smell a painfully white rut forming.
355 – I think of this blog as an update of Fussell’s “Class” too, and the WP in question are clearly the “upper middles” in Fussell, but what counts as upper-middle cultural capital has certainly changed since Fussell. I thought David Brooks’ BoBos in Paradise captured that change nicely, particularly the merging of yuppie-crunchy and elite worlds through the new currencies of taste and habitus (yes, that’s a pretentious Bourdieu term. But it works).
What’s great about this blog and about BoBos is that they got people thinking about class in America, and acknowledging new kinds of stratification.
375 Mango Girl, I couldn’t agree more that thinking about class is probably healthy — though perhaps my perspective differs from yours — and that most of this discussion focuses on a subset of Fussell’s ‘upper middles’ or perhaps his ‘class x’ group (with which he seems to invest the ultimate cachet).
I’m not so sure there’s really so much yuppy-crunchy merging with the real elite… though I think you do see quite a bit of playing along with it on the part of the children of the real upper class at their elite colleges and in their early young professional years.
The more profound differences resurface with marriage and children – how they’re raised, where they live, their education, etc. Upper-middles try to ape, but don’t really understand the signals and stick out as clearly as someone trying to pass as a u-speaker in England 30 years ago. It’s really pretty funny to watch, and some of it is even still a matter of language — there are locutions which members of the upper class (and even the ‘old’ upper middle) simply never use, and everyone has 2-3 that set his or her teeth on edge whenever they are heard.
This is getting really boring.
I would like to introduce the term “Patagucci.”
This is a really cool site that I enjoy reading, so I decided to create something that is different.
I’m not sure if people will like it or not, but please let me know what you think.
It’s called stuff that isn’t cool, basically it is about thing that annoy you.
http://stuffthatisntcool.wordpress.com/
white people (esp under 40) love tucker max.
Guilty as charged.
It’s obvious; Mango Girl and Cato should date (after grad school).
You really think this? This is lame, I doubt anyone thinks they are going to spontaneously go snowboarding or camping or kayaking, they are probably wearing something like this on the way to work or while out shopping for a completely different reason like… well… I don’t know… MAYBE TO KEEP WARM?!?!
Of course there are other things they could wear but well, I am sure you would just find a way to mock that as well.
You have jumped the shark and your racist over generalizations are very very very boring.
@ 383 why the fack are you even here if this website is “SO BORING”.
Thank for your .02 dirty cents
@370
There should be warning for American men dating European women: make sure your teeth are not brighter than dull orange, or you will embarrass them.
Great site.
I know there was a post on dogs, but you just have to do one on horses too. And how people dress up for the Kentucky Derby, and love Secretariat/Barbaro/whatever more than breathing air. I’ve never figured this one out.
And also, all the readers/posters here who STILL have no idea what SATIRE is, or continually suggest the “white people like blogs” post, or think this is racist, or think that it’s actually talking about every person with white skin in the entire world, do us a favor and just close the web browser before hitting Submit Comment.
while this is humorus – where are you getting this crap?
i think you talking about Yuppies.
please dont generalize.
I do #87 and #84 (including cargo #86) most weekends while drinking #76 and working in the garden. Most Sundays are spent with #46 and #1 in the morning, heading off to the #6 #5 (in fact am excited about this years CSA) and then listening to #44 and drinking either #24 or #23 and cooking a big meal. I recently returned from a year (sort of a #72) living in #58 working on #64. Before I left I #37my kitchen in a #73 part of DC where there is a #48 within walking distance and several #45 and #36. When I came back, I bought a #60and #61 but while there I loved #71, #54 #42, discovering #41on my #40 and of course #19 (hey, I was Peace Corps at one time). Have spend a few weekends recently in #26 going to #77 #43 and eating amazing food. Currently in my DVD player I have been watching #85from #39. And finally, I have been know to #67 , #63, #35 , #33, #25, #15 , #14, #8 .
To #112:
Boulder is pretty white. It’s a virtual fleece and Northface paradise most of the year.
—
http://thebrokenforum.wordpress.com/
182 Cato
“Living in Maine is white, but summering in Maine, especially in a family compound or on an island, is really really white.”
As a white guy that lives in Maine I can tell you that those of us that live here are “the wrong kind of white people”. Maine is the deep south of the north east. This blog is about the type of white people that summer here.
when you gonna add SWPL to the list? #100?
#309 Lincoln Park Chad
I was just thinking that the other day. I loved reading about the fabulous lives of the Lincoln Park Trixies! The local Chicago television news stations even did segments on that website–they thought it was a real club. lol
390 Elk … ah, yep. ’bout summer people.
wow…
I’m in my spanish class on my way to a liberal arts degree typing this on my apple computer which I carry in my north face backpack and to pay my way through college I work making expensive sandwiches and coffee…
it must be cuz I’m half white and half colonized asian who wants so badly to be accepted by the overculture that I wallow in my self hate hahahaha
don’t forget odwallas and cliff bars (do they still make those?)
what I noticed is white people like to complain about racism against white people…
I mean it is 2008 after all…
you should start your own blog called “I’m afraid that I’m gonna reap what I’ve sown” or ” Sure we’re in the majority and have consistently done whatever we could to keep everyone else down but don’t let one of our own have fun at our expense” or ” I’m too scared to post my name next to my racist comments so not only am I ignorant but I’m a coward too” or ” boohoo” or even ” middle class white americans who cling to some sense of identity that has been fed to them by rich white americans to keep the different groups separated and under their thumbs but are too caught up in having just enough to get by that they can’t see the forest for the trees”
and by the way isn’t like every other fucking channel WET?
xoxoxo
by the way this blog is funnier cuz I live in the Boulder of the Midwest…
Hahahaha, before I even opened the link my coworker sent me for this, I just burst out into laughter thinking of my white ice-climbing ex-boyfriend and how weird his outdoor performance clothes felt.
omg, I forgot about Patagucci – I’m reliving my Whistler years!
Thanks for that.
I heartily agree with comment #286 by tish.
We Seattle-ites definitely do wear this stuff as work wear. I don’t think I”ve seen any of my coworkers in “business casual” in years.
Bring on the Polartec.
an incredulous black person sent this to me. i promised her it’s all true, but she’s having a hard time believing it.
you should do a post on stuffwhitepeople blog.
seriously, white people love this blog
I love this blog, we just started up a new one, same idea, just for old people.
http://www.stuffoldpeoplelove.com
This blog is s tarting to feel like a phone in psychic of sorts…Instead o f providing real insight, he simply finds something general to which 95 percent o f people will naturally agree, then write in and say”you are reading my mind!”
Of course he is, because the author is using the most generalized of topics.
I have some ideas:
White people like:
being cannibals, being serial killers, reading about serial killers, torture-porn movies (saw, hostel,) and child-pornography.
When I see some articles talking about dahmer and ed gein, then I will start to t ake this site seriously. Otherwise, it really should be re-titled “stuff rich yuppies like,) and although I am a rich yuppie, half of the crap on here doesn’t apply to me, so it should actually read “stuff rich white coastal living yuppies like.”
Thank you! I have been outraged at the horrible and unexplainable fleece/northface/patagonia/bla bla bla fashion craze for years! This kind of crap started in places like Colorado and is now trickling into cooler places like California where we still believe in style. I hope that a lot of white people who read your articles so that they can feel like they arent typical white people (note: they are) really take this to heart and save the fleece vests for camping trips. PS get rid of your Crocs too!
Damn! Does this mean that I’m white? Nooooooooo!
As a black man that spends A LOT of time outdoors. I am notorious for taking “wellness days” to catch the perfect storm or take advantage of a clear, dry winter day to head to the crag.
Regardless of race, living in Seattle its almost necessary to be ready for any weather, especially rain.
This blog – specifically, this topic – is hillarious to me. I’ve got read up on what white people like so that when I’m out on the trail, I know how to approach you strange creatures ;o)
I’ve got to admit, I’m as guilty as all of you when it comes to looking the part. “Performance gear” is pretty stylee these days, but when comes down to it, its all about function over fashion. I’m pretty sure that NorthFace forgot this somewhere along the way.
I guess the “white people” referred to are affluent white people, and not the general public. I’m cauc and Native American and unfortunately cannot count my NA husband and myself among the prosperous here or anywhere. This commentary is kinda dumb as most white people I know can’t afford matching socks let alone matching work out clothes. Give me a break. Another myth perpetuated.
snoutrockets.com
This will HELP you ::wink wink:: KNOW what I mean?
wow. as soon as i read this post, i opened my closet and gazed sheepishly at the array of north face, patagonia, and marmot gear i covet and hoard (not to mention my merrell, crocs, keen, and birkenstock shoes). and then i looked out the window at my subaru outback with the roof rack (the kayak’s in the garage) and pretty much wanted to stab myself for being such a yuppie shit.
TO #245: Those white women with ski poles in the dirt were Nordic Walking. It’s a European thing–I just moved back the US a few months ago, and in Europe it seemed like everyone over 40 went Nordic Walking at least a few times a week. Guess it’s time to become the hot new activity for the over-40 Whites here in the US now.
Love the blog. At first I thought “Shorts” was a stretch–until I dropped off my son at school yesterday, the first sunny day over 50 degrees in a while — and just about every white kid there had on cargo shorts. And plenty had on fleece jackets with their cargo shorts.
385 clever and classless & free wrote:
“It’s obvious; Mango Girl and Cato should date (after grad school).”
Mango Girl, we’re busted!
face it…white, black, brown, yellow…we’re all conspicious consumers. How else do you think a company such as Northface can remain in business by charging the prices they do for a fleece jacket?!? uggs boots, starbucks, timberland, ipod ear buds…it’s all about the label and subsequent cachet.
I’ve been an REI member for years, yet still bought all of my outdoor gear via sierratradingpost. I admit, I’m a sucker for outdoor crap, but as long as sierratradingpost had it on sale, I didn’t care who made it. Recently, I went against my better judgement and bought a NF Denali jacket from REI. Now I really know how they make money, you have to purchase a slew of their overpriced base layers to keep the wind out. Alone, the jacket sucks.
Just had my nails done on my lunch hour and three women in the salon had on yoga pants, NIKE yip-up jackets and flawless hair and make-up.
Brian! This is excellent, I’m glad it’s so successful :-).
Oh and,
#567 – vacationing in “third world” countries
#789 – highlighted or colored hair
#989- Tavis Smiley
#879- talking about racism against white people
#989- saying nigga because… they have a black friend
#999- the merits of interracial dating
#1000- gay decorating shows
#1001- plaid
#1002- Darfur
#1003- Democracy
-hali
while we’re listing:
-Having Guilty Pleasures
-Tapas, Sharing Plates
This post was so funny it actually made me a little tingly
down you know where. Your articulation is mind-blowing.
Oh, and from reading all these posts, white people also like making fun of themselves.
Comment 407, Stone:
Why would you be outraged by a fleece jacket? Amused, of course. Annoyed, sure. Outraged? I bet you love vintage.
http://joseelretardo.com
I think this story was stupid. Most people I know don’t want to talk about their job when they are off work. Most people work because they have to. I don’t know what planet the writer is from but on planet earth most jobs are stressful and when people get off work they like to destress the best way they know how. It is not a race issue here. I think it is more a who’s got the money and the taste to wear those brands of clothing you’re talking about. Those brands are adverised everywhere so anyone is apt to wear them whether they work or not–they could be a drug dealers or prostitutes and wear those clothes. I live in a mixed neighborhood with all kinds of people from all different walks of life wearing all different kinds of clothes and you would be surpirsed at who does what.
I thought we liked vintage, ironic t-shirts and were anti-corporation?
Love the blog, but this week’s entries have been extra weak.
White people think they look sexy in Under Armor.
http://www.stuffoldpeoplelove.com
Everyone on this site should call this number 949-330-3080 x204 and ask this lady what color the green fire truck is?
Ask for Carolyn!
your blog sucks
@ post #420:
Wow! Could it actually be….that hidden in the satire of this website (or “story” if you want to call it that)….is some social commentary? LIGHTBULB! NO WAY.
/sarcasm
Today’s NYT Style has a review of performance hats…HATS!!
silly Caucasians.
Expensive outdoor cloths are universally popular with all races that can afford them, because the work. What may be different about white people is the pretense that they might actually go camping or something and need such clothes.
The Wu-Tang Clan set the trend of wearing North Face jackets way before white people started wearing them. Respect to the Wu.
So true!!! I work with someone who shows us the bottoms of her Keen or J-41 shoes every time she wears them. How do I know they’re Keen or J-41? Because she makes a point of mentioning the brand…..
http://stuffsouthernerslike.wordpress.com/
There are those who combine as well. I see the north face fleece vest over a lot of business casual here in SF and the silicon valley. I think they give you one when you move to the peninsula.
It’s sort of the equivalent of a bumper sticker saying “I’d rather be on my way to Tahoe.”
LOL, that is hilarious.
430 joe now, that’s a site! I jus’ don’ understand all this emphasis on Southern heritage, though… my grandmother always said if your people weren’t here before 1650, your weren’t a real Southerner….
##350, 357, 379, 413 (hi)(yu)ppie, Mango Girl, Cato–
Fans of Fussell (wonderful apt name, BTW) should definitely unite. Not as funny, but just as good as Prof Fussell at nailing the class of “white people” depicted here (and he does get the occasional one-line zinger off, too) is David Lebedoff, who writes of the “self-proclaimed smartest people in the land”:
http://tinyurl.com/ywhfuo
http://www.encyclopedia.com/doc/1G1-131003460.html
Fussell, of course, is clearly not a member of the upper class, but apparently had reasonable access, possibly through faculty or student acquaintances, to a number of upper class homes, and was an astute observer of the upper classes. Thus, his books is not quite the insider tour-de-force that Nancy Mitford’s or A.S.C. Ross’ earlier books were.
I would think “comment moderation” on this blog would require taking on full-time staff…
@ 419 Jose…
Hey Jose…outraged???…maybe. disappointed???…most definitely!!! Jacket wasn’t up to snuff imo. Vintage??? nope, neither functional, nor comfortable.
Now, off to ride my $500 bike back home, with my metal mug from some goofy trade show snugly resting in its metal cage and my Patagonia fleece in bike bag. Wrong, not a messenger bag but a dorky pannier…I’m so not hip! 😉
cheers!
that is funny
but I guess you have never been to “da hood”
cause the brutha man loves North Face
but maybe for the man on the corner that is his work clothing
not his recreational gear
Haha, as a nonwhite girl growing up in hippieville NYC, this is quite funny and seems quite accurate. Since we are on the topic of “stuff white people like,” I have a question. What is the fascination with Will Ferrell? I have never been able to understand it.
White folks are the coolest!
Like such as…
Yeah, so I’m sure that this has been said, seeing as there are hundreds of comments in this entry alone. But I’ll say it anyhow.
I love this blog and it’s content; I find it to be side-splittingly hilarious and true about myself.
However, I think your domain should be: stuffyuppieslike.wordpress.com instead. Your entries speak about stuff that a particular social demographic of people (i.e. yuppies) enjoy. And while a majority of yuppies are white, many are made up of other races too. To say that just white people like the things on your list is racist.
And if you started this blog as a cultural anthropology project or something, haha good job, but put more thought into your domain next time. Also, I curious as to what race you are.
http://www.stuffasianpeoplelike.net
http://www.stuffasianpeoplelike.net talks about asians only!
The writer of this blog is Christian Lander from LA: he’s the guy recycling in #64.
Interview here:
http://theassimilatednegro.blogspot.com/2008/02/stuff-white-people-like-interview-part.html
Does a lot of the stuff he talks about.
your ‘performance clothes’ will depend on the ‘performance’ that you engage in…..
You are just not going to believe this….well, my sister the golf pro from Jupiter Beach, FL drove up to her restore farm house in the mountainy part of upstate NY early this year. People ski there.
She had a friend come over to put the Thule bullet top on the Jeep Liberty. But she forgot that the Jeep is this year’s leased Jeep Liberty. The old, last year Liberty, was taken away.They have all been creamy/champagne in color so it’s hard to remember I guess.
So this year’s lease-jeep does not take last year’s Thule without a fucking (her word) adapter. So they send it turbo overnight coolie express and the friend come over the next day and on it goes.
Just a little Thule story.
And by the way, a guy in my monthly poker game owns and manages himself a bike shop. I saw his stuff last time I was in his Pennsylvania college town. I am pretty sure, from looking at his inventory and talking to a Coast Guard chief up her in Maine where I live, yeah..I am pretty sure that the new price of a “thousand dollar bike” is about 34 hundred dollars. I’m just saying that white people bikes are more expensive than they used to be.
As always,
Digby
HEY BIG SECRET SCOOP #445.
Everbody know Christian from about 11 and a half million posts ago. But, um, thanks.
(tell us #445 …. was you heart beating just a little faster when you outed clander?
I had a Cat-scan today and I am waiting for the results for the next week and if anyone out there thinks I am going to be polite during that wait…you got another thing coming.
Digby is my dog’s name for one thing. The other dog is Charles. And, YES. They are white people dogs: male litter mates; liver and white; English Springer Spaniels. Grooming them costs as much as 2.5 bags of groceries. Staggering, eh?
I love this blog ‘clander’ . I still want to meet you. I am flying to LAX on March 30 for a four nights of eating well and museums with my daughter and her film maker bf, then dash to Mammoth to ski a couple days than return to Bangor Maine airport which is 150 miles south of our island.
So, there is this Argentine fish taco place they know. Wanna come?
Digby
Barely hanging on @ 62.
You should do a blog about what black people like.
Something like,
rape, guns, beer, welfare, cusin’, yellin’, yellow teeth, robbing, any M rated video game, can’t forget Grand Theft Auto, chicken, McDonald’s, Black people also like to blame other people for their shortcomings, slang, the word “dawg” any many other fun things………
bahahaha! Gosh darn, this thing is so hilarious.
So tell me, what do black people want, eh? The opposite to this? bahaha!
Hoorah to your creativity!! [keep it up!]
This is off-topic, but I’m curious: why don’t you capitalize ‘Asian’? It’s not like black and white. It’s a continent! Do you capitalize ‘American’?
I respectfully request that you amend this particular practice of yours.
Also: i m azn
Bahaha! It looks like you answered my question, Katie. Thanks, it is interesting to hear you anthropological view on blacks, except, it is incredibly strong.
Bahaha! Maybe you should write one for blacks!!
#451 Sara— some people are just too lazy to cApItAlIzE aNyThInG.
Not me, though… I was thrown out of Japanese class for capitalizing katakana.
This is the best thing on the internet.
#435 Cato: “Fussell, of course, is clearly not a member of the upper class… Thus, his books is not quite the insider tour-de-force that Nancy Mitford’s or A.S.C. Ross’ earlier books were.”
Not a fair comparison. Those two were writing about a single class; Paul Fussell was writing about nine classes, at least. His work was encyclopedic, and not in depth on any one stratum.
David Lebedoff’s fascinating class structure (cf. #436) is made up of only two distinct groups:
“The Left Behinds”, or all of Fussell’s classes telescoped into one; and
“The New Élite”, those who’ve left any of Fussell’s classes (or any background) to form a new one. In other words, the “white people” inspiring 500 comments per post.
White people, especially the middle-class soccer parent minivan types love fanny packs too, don’t forget the fanny packs 🙂
North face is decidedly “wrong kind of white people,” at this point. Is this blog (intentionally) going in that direction now? Is this some kind of commentary on the growing popularity of this blog.
“Wrong kind of white people” might make up the majority of posters at this point…not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Awesome blog. You’ve described the quintessential Portlander/Seattleite in every way, shape and form. I’m originally from Seattle, but moved to Portland ten years ago. I thought all this stuff was normal until I moved to a small little hick town to go to college. Even then, there’s a small group of us who do yoga, hit the organic coffee shop (I counted seven iBooks the other day), drive the Prius, shop at the co-op and the Farmer’s Market, and watch art films at the local indie theater (owned by a guy who drives a Volvo, no less). It’s great to be a liberal. We have all the answers.
So some suggestions for future topics…
1) The library
2) Acupuncture (although that could mean alternative medicine)
3) Wheat-free bakeries
4) Gelato
5) Birkenstocks
6) Used-book stores
7) Vinyl records
8) Gardenburgers
9) Turkey bacon
10) Body wash
11) CLOTH DIAPERS
12) Cats
13) Hemp
14) World craft stores
15) Analog photography
16) Curb Your Enthusiasm/Seinfeld
17) eHarmony
18) 70% cocoa candy
19) Burley bicycle trailers
and
20) Electric lawn mowers
Don’t forget the Uggs!
Stuff Niggers Like
1. Rape
2. Collecting welfare
3. Whining about “racism”
4. Fried chicken
5. Watermelon
6. Muh dikk
7. Rioting
8. Looting
9. Gangs
10. Rap
11. Sagging pants
12. Affirmative Action
13. Jewish lawyers
14. Jenkem
15. Muh Dik
16. Staging “hate crimes”
17. Barack Hussein Obama
18. Dogfighting
19. Malt Liquor
20. Pimps
#458 Shaun: “Electric lawn mowers.”
Whiter-than-white people might prefer “acoustic”, i.e., a reel mower. And a postage-stamp lawn on which to use it.
lol I love this blog! I’m white and love REI and North Face. White people seriously love North Face.
Excellent! “The Insider’s Guide to Oregon Don’t Worry About Which City They Are Probably All The Same, and San Francisco”. I have acceptable outfits + scripts for an 80s night in any region. I can rule the world now!
that picture is too awesome and too typical.
i like it when performance apparel touts its ability to “wick sweat”, it always grosses me out and i picture it flicking on passersby. and yeah, i buy it and have bike racks, gore-tex, ya know the necessities.
@#460. that’s not true, no one likes yuh dikk. that’s obviously why you’re bitter.
Another thing white people apparently like is complaining about blog posts on a blog they aren’t forced to read. “We’re helping!”
OMG This website is all about Boulder, CO!!!
#406 Some Guy: “When I see some articles talking about [Jeffrey] dahmer and ed gein, then I will start to t ake this site seriously.”
Those would be on Stuff Wisconsin People Do, along with posts about Harry Houdini, Orson Welles and Liberace. And Chris Farley.
Are you a Nigger?
when are we getting a post about how white people like this website, like seeing how many of the topics apply to them – and THEN pretending they are embarrassed about it while secretly worshiping themselves, and THEN telling every white person they know about this site and sending them the link?
because i’m more than happy to write that post from personal experience.
but seriously.
when is this going meta.
white people love meta.
When I was growing up, my friends all looked down on NF. I think it’s because everybody was a ski racer, so the preferred brand was Spyder, or other European “sport” brands, as opposed to “outdoor” brands.
I’ve got 3 huge Rubbermaid bins full of performance gear, but I can count the times on one hand that I’ve worn any of it in a casual setting. I actually get a lot of use out of the stuff (I run 4000 miles/year, through all 4 seasons), so I never feel like I need to wear it in public. I guess I’m old school, but I’ve always thought synthetic materials were the epitome of classlessness, except when used for obvious performance purposes such as water resistance. (Not that waxed canvas isn’t nice stuff, but it’s less practical).
I must say, I ration out the number of blog entries I read per day…so that I’m not wasting valuable laughter all at once.
Can anybody possibly be reading 473 comments?
White people have nothing on Koreans when it comes to outdoor clothing. They’re fanatical about it.
Interesting blog. Kind of more appropriate at explaining ‘White Americans’ than ‘White People’ though.
white people like this blog, so it too, sucks.
-brown person
455 Win Your Weight in Immigrants™: OK… However, for another hilarious precursor of this blog that is comprehensive on many classes of whites, read Florence King. Her “WASP, Where is Thy Sting?” focuses on Protestant whites of all flavors and classes, and is one of the funniest, and most pointedly accurate things I’ve ever read. You will likely find many of her characters strongly resemble people to whom you are related and/or know well, perhaps even yourself.
I remain deeply skeptical of a real ‘new class’ or ‘elite’ really existing. As I mentioned before, I think it’s pretty much a college/early professional career phenomenon, and that behavior will (with some evolution of course, this stuff is not entirely static) revert to more traditional patterns and class distinctions will emerge as these folks marry and, particularly, have children.
You need to rename this blog – “Stuff White Liberals Like” – I don’t see any rednecks eating sushi or gloating about gentrification.
Minorities don’t wear shorts and sports stuff outside!? What planet is Lander living on?
well atleast the bloggers gettin the money for these posts. bottomline, if u expect to hang with whitey and be respected, u gots ta spend cash on dat gear.
i almost shat my pants when i read this- you can’t go anywhere at uvm (or in burlington for that matter) without seeing 100000000000000 north faces or subarus
is the internet on this list?
and ps curb/seinfeld would be an amazing one.
i live in seattle. white folks RUN north face. what?!?
my gawd. funny too, because i just have never thought
about getting one, and now i know why. and no, that
was the funniest one, YET…you’re not running
out of fodder. like #16 seyz, that was hillarious, especially the snapshot from da back. i like how white people who don’t fit
the gross generalization, make that point. “i’m not like them.”
maybe i should start wearing nf. oh wait cain’t…cause i got
nsf.
I am white, with no unusual ethnic background whatsoever, unless you consider my origins in the UK in the 17th century, arriving here on the Mayflower circa 16-something. And I love this list. Lighten up and laugh at yourselves all you tighta$$ whiteys.
Although I am an outdoorsy type I would never wear a North Face jacket under any circumstances, as I am a designer and their logo hasn’t been upgraded since the 70s. I am sensitive to dated logos. That’s another thing white people like. Logos, or now, the preferred term is “brand identity”. I prefer the minimalist Patagonia logo, which I sport on all my fleece jackets and vests.
so when’s the book deal happening?
You need to add birkenstocks! lol.
fuckin a- right!! mostly…
OK, Sorry everybody (you Mainers especially) also people in Ohio, rednecks, fans of dumb comedians, etc…..News Flash….you’re not “white.” It’s just that in some parts of the country there is a deficit of people of color to do the manual labor. But that is changing (see: Mexico) so you folks really need this blog. Either ape the ways of your betters, or? What you gonna do, repeal NAFTA (roll back history)? Dream on.
Shit. The fact that Asians are bigger consumers of North Face (and other factoids I learn here) is evidence that some folks are better at adapting to new realities than others. Hang on to your trailer….
This is stupid.
I see far more black people in NY wearing North Face than white people. Interesting.
What about FLIP FLOPS!!!! I couldn’t find anything on this site about FLIP FLOPS. When was the last time you saw someone who did not appear to be white and was not skulking across a college campus wearing flipflops in public?
Those shirts kick ass in the summer if you sweat as much as David Nalbandian like I do.
This is quite funny. I’m sure others have suggested it, but I think guitar hero, nalgene bottles, dave chappelle, and older videogames (Bond, MarioCart, NHL 96 for Sega Genesis) could all fit in here. Also the New Yorker.
Somebody needs to declare a moratorium on starting comments with “OMG! That’s sooo true!”
We get it. This is stuff white people like.
it could be -10 degrees (with sunshine, so it seems warmer) and you’ll see the person with just a fleece on and flip-flops.
#491 thats my campus
Love your site. How about adding Burning Man???
the idea of public transportation
Perfect. This must be covered.
How about:
Safari (not hunting, because this is the wrong kind of white people), but African safari. Of course, you don’t shoot anything on this safari but your camera. Uniquely, white.
Electric Lawnmowers. Nothing says you’re white and oh so environmentally conscious like an electric lawnmower. Bonus white points for a manual blade cutter.
Gardening. Especially growing your own vegetables. White people love to share the fact that the tomatoes they brought in to share were grown in their garden without any pesticides, and they taste oh so much better than anything you can get anywhere else. To gain favor with this white person, sample the tomato and tell them how sweet and juicy it is, and then ask them how they cared for it.
hey, #448 digby, you must have a lot of free time on your hands if you remember 11 1/2 million posts ago..yikes! i hadn’t read about Christian before, but, unlike you, i don’t have time to wade through hundreds of posts for each topic, so i’m glad the poster 445 pointed it out.
i like the picture of the carabeaner–it made me laugh out loud!!
and in case anyone didn’t notice… this blog is written by a white person, and read by soley white people. because only white people like to read/write blogs!!!
What an ignorant load of crap. I guess it’s never rained where you live.
I prefer to call them Gortex Hippies
hahahhahahaa
I go to TCU, and among college students (especially frat hacks and hot sorority babes), the North Face is super popular. Like you can’t go five minutes if the weather is 70 and below without seeing any North Face
The sub-category for this-or depending on your p.o.v.-uber category is the snow boarder/atv gear by ALPINE STARS or OAKLEY.Every white kid in Califorinia/Oregon/Nevada/Arizona would have you believe that he/she is headed for MAMMOTH/BIG BEAR/MOAB when school let’s out.They keep the snowboard racked on the Tahoe with a lift kit.Nevermind the performance clothing.How the hell do you keep gas in a lifted suv with 35″ tires.I’ve seen kids wearing ski-pants and Oakley goggles on 75 degree days in LA….with the nearest snow 3-4 hours away.
As a non-white person, I love this website. It’s so spot on.
Oodles of love,
I
#476 Cato–
I’m a big fan of Miss King, and tried for a decade to get “WASP, Where Is Thy Sting” at a decent price, with no luck. But just now I found it for ten bucks on Bookfinder.com, so thanks for the well-timed reminder. I also have “Way of the WASP” (Brookhiser), which is respectful, and “The WASP Mystique”, which is psycobabble.
Your (optimistic?) class analysis reminds me of a recent Cornell graduate of paleocon tendencies, who assured me most of the loony lefties he knew there would be Republicans in 20 years, and that, “Go ten miles out of town, and you’re among normal people again.” I can vouch for the latter.
#503 Glad to hear that there’s still hot White chicks at TCU!!
Regards.
So that’s the whole Northface crazy. Everybody in my college’s swim team adorns themselves in Everything Northface, from shoes to bagpacks. The funny thing though is how they laugh at you when you own something else other than Northface.
Remember the hilarious episode on “Seinfeld” when George Costansa (sp?) was sporting a puffy gortex coat? He looked like the Michelin man..Priceless
you hit the mark square on this one! You forgot Mountain Hardware. I’ve recently switched away from black North Face jacket because everyone, … and I mean everyone has it. If you go to a college campus in the fall/winter… play the North Face game. It’s much better than the highway game of “lovebug” (VW bugs). trust me!
WRITE A BOOK! everyone would buy it!
yes
North Face
either Ghetto Gear or a preppy raincoat
so it is not just white folks
but yes
it was funny when the local bar in my hood got reviewed as a top ten “dive bar” in DC
the North Face rolled in
white kids from GW thinking they are cool
hate to say it
there are only three Beastie Boys
i like shoes. since moving to greenpoint, brooklyn in 1962 and noticing the inhabitants knew of such things as shoes and sidewalks, i realized shoes are integral to the emulsification of education and civilization of sore-footed humans. here in idaho, progress in somewhat struggling outdoor mental cases has the witness of hope as most children seem to be able to walk while wearing shoes without much difficulty. there are, of course, many transplants here in idaho from california who stand on corners staring at ‘walk’ signs. they seem hesitant to step into the street which leads to the ponderance of their history of experience with footwear. all rational people should remember the greatness of the 300 spartans and the strength of their footwear enabling them to stand their ground. i now tie my loafers for entrance to my security tower before kicking the television. keep that smile.
i don’t know if this has been said yet cuz I didn’t read EVERYTHING on this blog, but let it be known. WHITE PEOPLE LOVE THEM STUPID OVERPRICED BOOTS CALLED UGGS!
who needs clothing? I’m a nudist baby!
Omg, I fucking love this blog!
This is what I wrote on my own page a couple of years ago in regards to dating deal breakers:
*THE NORTH FACE- I was once dating someone who on a Sunday morning was leaving my house and she pulled out of her over night bag a North Face fleece. Not too mention that I think she put on a baseball cap, that’s another story. My point being, I was so freakin’ let down. Does any thing say Yuppie waste of money like North Face apparel? When Midwestern kids head to college do they get a North Face item at the front door? I just don’t get it. Is there magic in having that logo embroidered somewhere on your person? Please, are they the only ones who make down jackets and fleeces? Even better yet, if you should buy one elsewhere it may be free of any advertising. Have you thought about that? Unless you have stock in the company then I apologize.
MEC is everywhere here, work, school formal, informal but it’s not just the white folk. People joke that looking for the MEC logo is the easiest way to identify a fellow Canuck overseas.
I’m wearing a Columbia jacket at this very moment.
I wear all that stuff and even have that Thule attached to the roof of my minivan. The performance clothing comes in very handy when on the mountain, which is where I spend most of my time. The Thule comes in handy to, because I live in my van, it’s where I keep all the food I buy at Wal-Mart. And the performance gear? I get that at Goodwill, I simply wait for the other white people to figure out they enjoy being lazy and will never ever climb a mountain because they are so busy with their blogs and blackberries. Eventually they donate the clothing to make room in their closet for newer versions of the performance clothing. Half price at Goodwill is the last Saturday of the month!
Yes, fat white people at the megamall decked out in Under Armour sipping lattes do look ridiculous.
In case no one else has mentioned it (because I am too white/busy to take the time to read 500some posts) Life is Good gear functions quite well as a white person’s retirement wear, even though it looks as if someone who was either 5 or 15 designed it. I have not seen any 5 or 15 year olds wearing it.
The materials are all very soft and natural looking, mostly pastel (mauve for men)l and slightly faded to look well worn. I guess the stick people and the kind of flowers a girl doodles on her notebook provide comfort to the retiree’s inner white child–or makes it seem cute that they are eventually going to be returning to the fetal position. OK that’s harsh. My parents wear it, I confess, and they also have gay friends. They are in their seventies.
Too funny! We get so excited because there is an outlet mall (another thing white people like) on the way to the lake we visit each summer. There is a North Face outlet there and a Columbia one as well. We look forward to that stop every year and allow extra drive time for it.
You know what else we like that I don’t think has been covered? Rain gear. Wellies. Cute rain gear to be specific.
I tend to get bad vibes reading the author’s blogs. Why can’t all these things just be “dumb people” things, why do we ever bring “race” in to ANYTHING.
We’re just all homo sapiens with some differing physical traits because of various geographical regions where we adapted for tens of thousands of years. Simple.
#13 living in a middle-of-nowhere town in the Peruvian Andes? Amybug you’re my new whitegirl crush.
I can’t decide if it’s bad that Chacos were not included in this post, or maybe they deserve their own. But really, white people love their Chacos (including myself).
Wait! Did I leave the milk out overnight? Dang it. No, wait. No…was it the iron I left on? Or was it the milk I left out? I just can’t remember anymore. Does that make me racist?
#522 I agree. I am sick of these people who inject race into everything and every life decision they make.
I find it odd that Bono helps Africa, is in a great band, a band that is perhaps the most famous globally — yet you will never see an African-American in a U2 t-shirt. Ever.
This is mathematically impossible if Blacks weren’t inveterate racists. (“I ain’t wearing no white shirt!”) There really can be no other explanation, can there be? It would be mathematically impossible otherwise.
#526 – You might want to learn what “mathematically” and “impossible” mean.
If you say so… Personally, I like being warm. It rains a lot in Seattle, and we get harsh wind coming off Puget Sound. Seems like there are two choices: dress for the weather, or suffer the wet cold because you have something against parkas. I’ll take the sensible route.
north face rocks. being what rocks
I know, right!?
HA! Good call!!
I hadn’t really thought about this, but I noticed that probably 60-70% of my dental school class (which is about 6% asian and 0% black, otherwise lily-white) wears northface every time the temperature drops below 70 or so.
Argh. Guilty as charged. I so rock the Northface.
#526 Good observation. So true.
@531 Where do you go to school? It must be bliss….and hard to find today. Good luck to you.
White people making fun of each other always leads to fascists showing up.
Damn! i’m f*cking white! But good looking =)
All very valid comments, and a fun blog. I had to pipe in!
I own two North Face items. I bought my backpack in high school (almost 10 years ago) and have used it on a weekly basis since and is still together without any rips, tears, cuts or anything. When I bought it for 90 dollars back then, my friends were shocked. Guess what? I haven’t bought a backpack in ten years. That’s why I bought North Face. Because it got good reviews, and has served my purposes nicely. That’s like 9 dollars per year, and worth every penny.
The second North Face item I bought solely on the presumption that they are good products that last, not because of any fashion statement or faux-extreme lifestyle. I bought a HyperVent North Face parka for 80% off at Moosejaws Outfitters. I live in Michigan, where everyday life generally requires such coats in the Winter.
Don’t forget that you can combine your choice of Outdoor Gear (#87) with your desire to move to Canada (#75) …
by purchasing Arc Teryx 🙂
I haven’t read all 538 responses to this blog post, but from what I’ve skimmed I didn’t see one mention of clothes REDNECKS like to wear (and redneck can transend skin color). You can’t forget about such outdoor and hunting wear companies as Carhartt, Cabela’s, or Mossy Oak. There’s nothing like wearing a pair of Carhartt pants that not even barbed wire could rip a hole through. And you never know when your buddy is going to call you up on a Friday afternoon and say, “We’re going hunting. Fill up the beer cooler and meet me outside your house. No time to change.” Then you will be glad you had on your camo bib overalls to bring in the firewood.
Look here…
This site is mediocre at best. It is mildly entertaining. Half of the items on this list are garbage. The effort and thought put into this list is pretty embarrassing.
if you want some actual funny entertainment/blog/writing/insightful/great stuff
http://www.garbarrassing.com
go for it.
I swear that about 60% of the girls in my highschool own all of the colors of the North Face fleece jackets. honestly.
And most of them are either on one of the sports teams, or are just following the crowd. ^^;
When I was a boilermaker (out’a Local 1, Chicago) I would burn up a set of Carhartts a year, bibs and coat. Burning, arc-gouging and welding will eventually eat them up even if you never wash them.
Which you shouldn’t do you know, you should never wash Carhartts, they don’t shed fire as well then. Anyone who washes them doesn’t need them. Like electricians, the Yuppies of the building trades, their Carhartts never get burned or ripped and get washed so many times they turn a bone white, like ivory. They could wear sports coats and sans-a-belt slacks to work.
All this obsessing over The North Face. Do that many people really buy that over-priced shit? Shocking. I stopped in a North Face store a few weeks ago – first time in at least 15 years. It was a total boutique. I think I saw a sleeping bag in the back. No one bothered me though, which bothered me a little – that I’m so obviously not TNF profile: the guy who buys seconds through Sierra Trading Post.
Give TNF this: the VE-25 is still the best all-around 4-season tent. Period.
i am a white person,
and i love outdoor performance clothing.
the new gold standard: lululemon
This post is dead on the money. I have been calling this out for a long time. White people absolutely love north face. Just like black people love bluetooth, white people love northface. It says everything, without saying anything.
Cheers,
JM
Can I just say that I was nearly rolling on the pavement in laughter when I spotted a group of white people in north face crossing the street. I had just read this blog the day before…so so funny! Dead on!
I am white and wearing a North Face right now. Good call!
I didn’t even know Northface EXISTED until I went to a certain “baby ivy” school . It still amazes me as to why its so popular. White people LOVE being unique, but they all end up being the same…
Uh… according to DrJay, North Face is “Urban Hip-Hop”
or
http://hiphopruckus.blogspot.com/2008/01/north-face-coldest-and-steepest.html
according to HipHopRuckus its
“The North Face: The Coldest and Steepest”
I’ve gotten to the point that I just wear it to work , in seattle it’s expected, plus you can go kayak with your blackberry and pretend you are working , or work and pretend you are playing. sad ..
This is too funny!
Anybody who disses whitey on this doesn’t remeber the past, they don’t know how bad it was. When they were wearing those flourecent ski-jackets with all the lift tickets stapled to the zipper. “Hey “Tyrone” I just got back from Vail, how was your vacation in Atlanta. Now that the ELF and others are burning down Ski-lodges now “I don’t ski I go moutain biking and back packing, I live off the earth and……”
Time to shut this site down!
You see a lot of people here in the Denver/Boulder area wearing this type of clothing including myself but a lot of people out here actually do outdoor activities not just talk about it.
So true. Never know when you might have an opportunity for spontaneous mountain climbing or might get caught in an unexpected blizzard or monsoon in the mall parking lot. Here in DC you see entire families of white people wearing their performance gear on Saturday at Tyson’s Corner Mall, which they drove to their in the Lexus SUV, hybrid, of course. Save to oil to make more performance gear.
this is so damn funny… and so sadly true. i make fun of these outdoorsy wanna-be types all the time. my favorites are the beach brand wearing white people… who live a minimum of 400 miles from any coastal area.
I’ve enjoyed this site, but this particular blog is stupid. It’s not clever or even funny. Are you running out of things white people like? And, I’m around a lot of stuffy white people all day long, so I get it, just not this one.
Ever seen a black dude with a fur lined parka in the middle of the summer? Of course you have! Now that’s prepared!
Wow…how’d you get a picture of me in my black north face? hahah… but for me, the fleece is more of a uniform- suitable for work AND play. but i’m still a student.
Its sad that I’m black and all I shop for is outdoor clothes. Ever since I left the Marines, were you basically put on outdoor clothes everyday it was a natural progression to walk down to REI or The North Face and outfit myself.
Some have mentioned Carhartt’s as apropos for this “Outdoor Performance” use, but I don’t think so. I think they are more for those upper crust whitebread whites who want to faux show empathy for those who do real work, honest-living jobs, building and making things, like carpenters and plumbers and brickmasons and gaffers.
The majority of whites including the plumbers do seem to break out the North Face and Columbia and, on the less-moneyed end, the Everlast or Jerzees– most to camp in front of ESPN, to watch NASCAR or golf as applicable.
REI is overpriced; Campmor or Army surplus on ebay is where it’s at.
That’s right, I’m wearing a Campmor techincal camping shirt as I type; but realize that my door and one window are open, and an outdoor thing could happen at any moment. You just don’t know.
Bingo. I never go anywhere without my Champion Fleece Hoodie. An additional facet of this fascination is the insistence on a lack of name-branding logos larger than say 3 inches on the upper left front of the garment. Any full back or chest size brand logos is an uncouth display of your lack of subtlety, and glaring proof that you support global industries that may utilize unfair labor practices at their assembly plants located in developing nations. It can also result in people who may not know you on a first name basis to assign an annoying pet nickname derived from the company of the logo — i.e. “The Addidas Guy” or “That Nike Dude who walks everywhere”.
OMG! This is sooo funny!
I’m in seattle and no one knows how to dress anymore.
We make fun of those women who wear velour track suits but is it any better to go to Starbucks all decked out in REI?
Have you done a post on white (trash) people who wear pajama bottoms and slippers in public!!??
where im from i rarely see white people wearing the northface.
its always young black teens who tend to sport them.
Just got back from Patagonia yesterday. Brought in some old stuff and walked out with a new $350 jacket for $5. I’m just waiting for my boy to call for the impromptu snowboarding trip.
White girls love their designed Lulu Lemon sweatpants, going to the famers market, Starbucks, the gym, or waslking outside… nothing is more white than paying $120 for sweatpants. The white girl uniform in Canada.
boulder is the whitest place on earth!!! i’ve become a total banana (yellow on the outside, white on the inside) since going to school there.
And how is this different from other ethnic varieties liking FUBU or G-Force or Timberland (which used to be outdoor clothing)?
Holy cow, I have that exact jacket in the photo. I knew I was white, but this seals the deal.
Oh MAN – that is me and everybody I work with. Very accurate description. And yes, I even have one of those ‘things’ holding my keys (not to my shorts though, I have some taste). Do I get white points for having the name of my university printed on the ‘keychain.’
We even got the office token wearing North Face (yes buddy, that is you ; )
This is funny because it holds a mirror up to my whiteness….and I like what I see!
What about Arc’teryx? Gotta be the most expense (and high quality) outdoor stuff out there. And it’s made in Vancouver, Canada (except for the stuff made in China). Which has to make it even more white!
Thing is, those companies actually make quailty stuff, and most of them will replace it if it fails. I know that we white people are so prone to “spontaneous camping” as you suggest, but for anyone who ever does go do some real hiking/camping, having decent gear is very nice.
By real hiking/camping, I don’t mean the kind where you hook up the electricity and plumbing to the trailer/RV, or where you park the car and set up the tent. I mean where you pack everything for a week or two (including food) on your backs and head into the woods. Having some sturdy Patagonia shorts for that might be a little better than Wal-Mart.
Ever gone camping with city-folk before? Talk about entertainment…..
Now, all that said, I know lots of white people who wear this stuff and have never had their SUV off pavement and never cooked their dinner over a fire (not counting a BBQ).
This one I don’t relate to. Perhaps the site should be clarified so it is understood that the author is not really talking about ALL white people. The author is talking about liberal, upper middle class, professional, urban, blue state, white people who like to go to Starbuck’s and pay $5 for a fancy coffee drink. I am almost in this crowd, but not all the way. I have no clue what the author is talking about when he talks about “high performance clothes.”
It is not completely true that all white people use performance wear to separate their work and social lives. Some wear performance wear while working (especially if working outside of the office) to show how “against the grain” they are.
I love north face but only the black fleeces and jackets hmm?
lol. and please don’t forget marmot.
Don’t forget the preferred outdoor activity while wearing your performance clothing : recumbent biking.
A sure sign that I have hit my mid-thirties: I recently bought a Columbia windbreaker. Like a tree in hurricane, I stood my ground, but finally succumbed to this trend from the 1990s. Next up for me, I will be buying penny loafers.
This is definitely an American thing.
You can always spot the americans because of the North Face jackets and the outdoor wear!
I’ve actually noticed this more with blacks than whites. Sometimes you will see an ENTIRE black family all clad in the same expensive “athletic” gear.
This is lame, yeah, there are a lot of white ppl in Portland, OR wearing outdoor clothing, but most ppl in Portland are white, and guess what? It rains A LOT- who likes walking around in wet clothes?
I live on the OR coast, just West of Portland (even more rain 70-100 inches), and you feel pretty stupid (regardless of race) not wearing waterproof clothing. We basically get wind-driven rain for about 10 months solid, and if you are at the office and head out for anything- lunch, home, post office- you better be wearing a Marmot or a N face with a hood. My personal favorite: the “Seattle cowboy hat”- this is a waterproof goofy looking floppy hat with a drawstring to keep the wind from blowing it off. You need rain pants to walk the dog and we have shoes that feel kind of like nikes but don’t get wet. Other popular N Coast items: generators, coleman stoves, board games, canned food, lots of matches/candles (for when the storms knock out the power for a week). If you have to barbeque outside after your house just got its roof blown off in December and you’ve been out of power for a week, yeah, guess what- bring on the cool outdoor gear. Its not like my brother in CA wears this stuff, hes white, but he just doesn’t get all that crazy rain.
“This is lame, yeah, there are a lot of white ppl in Portland, OR wearing outdoor clothing, but most ppl in Portland are white, and guess what? It rains A LOT- who likes walking around in wet clothes?”
So go to the hardware store and get a rubber or plastic raincoat, you can get real long ones and with hoods too. They make pants too. Cost you about 25 bucks.
i love this site. i always wondered what white people liked
yo gaycondo, we wear old north face cause that was before they turned into a fasion design and their old stuff is higher quality than their current consuer chit
To go along with that, white people also like early morning runs, esp. in their Northface jackets or jackets with no sleeves. I have only seen white people going for jogs before dawn breaks.
I’m an older white person who has never heard of these brands! Give me jeans and a t-shirt and I’m happy anywhere. If I can’t go there in jeans and a t-shirt, why would I want to go?
You did not just call this out! How funny. Oh how I wish it were appropriate to name names. Oh how I wish it! My question has always been, why do you need a weather proof jacket good in rain and to 30 below, when you’ll just run back to your Volvo and drive right out of the elements?
As a black person, I have a lot of white friends. There are times that I will ask them where they got those Columbia shoes. If it’s something that completely stands out, I will ask about it. The outdoor performance clothes tell us that they’re low key. But there are some white people who like the Sean John, Jay-Z’s clothing and urban/hip-hop clothing that’s popular now. And.. they actually can pull it off, yet keep their own identity.
If I see someone wearing outdoor clothes, I would assume that they’re headed to the mountains the next day or so. Or if they’re driving a Jeep or a rugged 4 x 4 truck.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilderness_chic
Very white…except in Scotland.;)
Hey All,
This is a great section. I was just talking about this this past week while I was ice climbing lol. How people go out and purchase the “outdoor performance” clothing because it is trendy. Sad thing is, that companies are catering to these people. As an example; you can purchase a medium North Face soft shell and it will fit several body types, but if you purchase a medium Mountain Hardwear soft shell it will fit only those who are active and with little to no gut. This is why you see lots of North Face / Columbia clothing showing up at mainstream sports stores such as sportcheck etc; everyone can wear them
As a side note, I was thinking about something else that white people love and i am most definately in this category as I own several pairs……..Birkenstocks.
lol so true
“. I was just talking about this this past week while I was ice climbing lol. ”
Ice climbing? Why would anyone want to climb ice? I try to avoid the crap. I used to climb iron but I was paid to do it.
OMG – Have you ever been to Seattle? I’ve split my time between Phoenix and AZ and while outdoor performance clothes aren’t big in AZ this article basically sums up Seattle.
Nicely done!
Seattle is one place where outdoor clothes are legit.
Seattle is also very White, since most of the people there know something about nature and the natural state of man.
Whites have always the only people that cared about the outdoors and nature. That’s why Whites sailed the globe, trekked to the poles, climbed the highest mountains, became the world’s best farmers, top biologists, etc. while the blacks sat around their huts doing nothing, and mexicans did much the same.
Ever notice that the house of a mexican housekeeper isn’t in order? or that the house of a mexican gardener has no landscaping? I mean, it takes a White mind to understand nature.
Oh no! I was going to bring up the fact that LL Bean is cooler than any of those others. I do not own a North Face jacket. I do own a pair of tevas and my husband own’s a Saab 9-3 (P.O.S.) and I own a VW Jetta!
Ack. And the Guinness REALLY DOES taste better in Ireland.
I’m so white. I can’t wait to find a post in here that talks about Hawai’i.
I remember when Timberland boots were considered outdoor performance gear. I just saw a Northface jacket with a belt and fake fur on it. Definintly not white. Y’all are pandering.
I like northface fleece jacket, they’re light and warm…….especially when I paid $50 for it. But no, not at $150 a pop, they fed their goose with organic stuff?
Don’t forget L.L. Bean!
yall on this cofibfuwekfbcwfhbehbvfiwe so bafuhweufchnwefuohnhwefuon
This presumably applies to white people living in the USA. I was thinking just along these same lines this last week – coz it’s so true it annoys me to bits. Everyone around here on weekends is going out around the squaaarre for brunch in their flipping fleeces (Boston area). It’s so obvious to me becauze noone in Europe does this on such a massive copy-cat scale. Go figure.
Underarmour is more directed at the… I’m 28, fat, still playing sports guy…. or the “coach” how many dad’s walking around the grocery store need to be wearing moisture wicking UA while reading off of a list his bitch wife printed up for him…. getting kind of cold, may have to go get my north face denali jacket!
As a person who has lived in Bushwick, Brooklyn all of my life, the only people I see wearing North Face are people of color. Most of the white folk moving into my hood seem to be the type who wouldnt be caught dead wearing it.
Wow. Absolutely hilarious. Coming from Alaska I’ve always believed people should have to fill out applications to wear those sorts of clothes. Sadly the public likes to waste money for things they don’t need. Posers.
I hate when white people where EKO…I think that white people are the weirdest creatures…..FUBU 4 life man
COLORADO = snowboarding = environmentally friendly = an Obama state = plenty of gay people = everyone wears outdoor performance clothing
if u aint got a northface fleece and ur a preppy type ur not cool.carhartt is cooler
lolz
My friend’s white boyfriend works in an office and lives in an appartment in the city next to his office. He has sat nav.
He also has a compass attached to his belt at all times.
Oh my gosh.
You couldn’t be more right.
I’m sick of white people wearing performance wear when you know they haven’t done ANY sort of physical activity ever…and i mean EVER.
The point of high performance clothes is to help you perform in either really cold or really hot weather (underarmour, north face, patagonia, etc)…if you’re going to be a lazy ass like 90% of the people who buy these clothes, then shop at Kmart or Marshalls.
It’s sad that they buy these clothes to impress other people or falsely make others think that they are actually athletes.
Wow, this is right on the money.
This probably does not qualify as performance clothing but I have NEVER EVER seen a black person in “Life is Good” clothing.
I’m with you. Jeans, t-shirt and I’m happy
I always am snowboarding and it’s always quite spontaneous so HA there is spontaneous snowboarding and let’s just say I’m always prepared
btw i don;t own a northface
Don’t forget: white people also like to talk about the how their high performance clothes have wicking capabilities. White people get very excited about wicking.
“carhartt is cooler”
Actually so many dipsticks wear Carhartt now that in one of the few changes in construction worker style many have taken to wearing green millcoats rather than Carhartts. Some guys even wear the green trousers.
The style started with Ironworkers, Boilermakers and Pipefitters who did blast-furnace relines, now the style has spread to the other trades.
Maybe I shouldn’t say anything, I don’t want to see some “hipster” with a careful beard and a non-threatening tatoo wearing a mill jacket as he pours my coffee at Starbucks.
Before the summer rolls around, you need to write a post about two prevalent white people fashion trends:
1. Birkenstocks – a.k.a. birth control for the feet.
2. White people who wear flip-flops all-year round EVERYWHERE they go.
Funny as fuck. Love your blog.
I love my birks.
ahahaha… I have never understood this trend. it boggles my mind.
the gay face
wow, everyone is way behind the curve. Sustainably produced merino WOOL is fast eclipsing fleece and other technical synthetics as the new first choice of clothing for white people.
“If you plan on spending part of your weekend with a white person, it is strongly recommended that you purchase a jacket or some sort of “high performance” t-shirt, which is like a regular shirt but just a lot more expensive.”
Man, you are flipping hilarious!
All my cracker friends wear this exact outdoor crap. Except they’ve never stepped off the trail into the woods.
It’s a all about ‘the outdoor look’.
Complete posers.
Very true, although an Asian friend of mine has spent hundreds on his skiing outfit, including thermal and hi-tech undergarments, etc. Me, I spent about $50 total on the outfit I wear to the slopes, and we both ski about the same black diamonds.
It’s not about the “Outdoor Look”…it’s about wearing clothes that work for what you’re doing. That’s the same reason why you can find footwear for anything. You wear heels for dressing occasions, boots for hiking, sandles for casual wear, cycling shoes to clip into your pedals. Why would you want ONE pair of shoes to do it all? The same applies to outdoor apparel. Walmart crap fleece doesn’t cut it if you’re in the outback so why wear it everyday…especially since it doesn’t last…and don’t get me started on that…most of the stuff from The North Face, Patagonia, Mountain Hardwear will last a life time…and they stand behind their products…I suppose you can keep buying cheap Kmart fleece once a year to save money or buy one that will last for years.
Not only that, but it’s really more about function rather than fashion. I just like clothes that work and do what I need them to do.
On another note…have you ever seen a black person on the ski slopes? Wearing The North Face is kind of white thing because black people don’t ski or camp or do very many outdoor activities so they leave all the fun stuff to whitey.
I ❤ north face!
Hey man, totally agreed with you on this one. I work at Kathmandu, a leading outdoor clothing and equipment company in New Zealand. It is true that many New Zealanders enjoy their outdoors and stuff. How many people nevertheless can afford expensive Gore Tex jacket? How many people do actually go to sub zero terrains to use their 500 dollars tent that promises of survival in the Antartic? So if I don’t have an expensive Wind Proof fleece wear I cannot go to a national park? Is that what it is all about?
But I swear many of those rich people who can afford our shirts and Performance clothing will not do anything except maybe drive their expensive SUVs (Cayenne and Q7 or whatever) to a local shop to buy a coffee. Or pick up their children, with pride of course (in their car as well as in the techniqual performance clothing they are wearing).
It is just plain pathetic but companies thrive on people’s idea of freedom and outdoor.
As a black professor that has taught at three predominantly white college campuses, I couldn’t aggree more with this phenomenon. In fact, what I REALLY want to understand is the combination:
NorthFace fleece on top
Thong sandals, yes flip flops of birkenstock leather quality on bottom.
How these students don’t fear frostbite, is beyond me.
Yeah, what’s with that? How come you never see a black person skiing, camping, kayaking? It’s rarer than a unicorn. I guess they’ve fallen prey to the socialization that they should only strive to be a pro athlete or rapper and left all the outdoor activities to the cracker heads. Kind of sad that they don’t even see it. Wearing outdoor clothing isn’t so much a white thing…it’s just not a black thing. I do see a lot of immature white kids trying to look cool with their hats on sideways and their crack haning out above their jeans which is predominantly a black thing. So I don’t know if the whole wearing the whole outdoor lifestyle thing is such a white thing after all…it’s more on how you’re socialized.
If you grew up with black values or white ones. Color doesn’t matter, but how you were socialized does.
If you can say that whearing Outdoor performance clothes is a white thing than I guess you can say skiing is a white thing too or camping or kayaking…etc. but I don’t see those on the list…maybe some one should add them.
am I white or just too lazy to deal with shopping for appropriate clothes? I got my 1st gortex jacket in 1990 so I’d never get wet walking around campus, and for the occasional backpacking excursion. Here it is 2008, I’m on my second jacket (they wear like iron!) and I still can be seen in town, looking like a dork, with a red and black jacket over jeans or skirts, or actually on a trail in shorts (with handy pockets).
I guess these nazis are upset with your portrayal of White people:
http://www.stormfront.org/forum/showthread.php?p=5301911&posted=1#post5301911
I wear outdoor performance gear, and do spontaneously go hiking, climbing, and other outdoor activities. Maybe people caught on to the fact that quality outdoor gear lasts forever.
Quality, meaning NOT northface, of course, which is owned by Vogue magazine.
I have about 20 variety of fleece either stolen or vintage, I need to have every color to match all my New Balance. I also spontaneously go hiking and snowboarding. Or wind up on a beach, because I just have it good like that.
Vintage T-shirts should only be around the house.
Vintage outdoor gear is whats good. And rare brands from Canada and Europe, or some Helly Hanson, Nike ACG, Canada Goose, Penfield, etc…
The new black North Face 100 thickness fleece is so amateur.
I made a futsy today. It was loud and smelly. All the other gorillas in the elevator pretended not to notice until their nostrils melted.
yea, got me too. I love my Patagonia underwear.. it really wicks the sweat away as I run on the treadmill listening to Spanish language tapes for work…
V, is that a heart or a butt?
Stuff White People Like:
Living in a middle-of-nowhere town in the Peruvian Andes.
Reference #7 Diversity, #14 Having Black Friends (or in this case, sweet innocent Peruvian friends, preferably who speak Quechua rather than Spanish, to have cross-cultural friendships with), #71 Being the Only White Person Around.
Hey – white people like national parks. Black people do too! And people of all colors!!
Take action on a senate pans for a public lands package that has critical bills to protect our national parks. go to http://www.npca.org.
tell your senators what you think – sign the petition
Yeah, that’s right. Go to any college town, and then through the doors of any IT company in the area. What do you see? EVERYONE wears outdoor performance clothing ALL the TIME.
How can you tell if they aren’t working? Unless they’re nekked you can’t!
So so true… I recently joined the ranks of loads of other white “rock climbers,” which I believe many white people are trying to add to their list of cool outdoor exploration activities. No one in that “ahead of the curve” group would ever be caught dead in a north face denali, or anything by columbia. If it isn’t mountain hardware, marmot, mammut, or the all-time favorite (starting at upwards of $250 for a shell) is arcteryx. Freaky, but I just bought my first marmot raincoat and I have stayed dry without an umbrella during the torrential rain of the michigan late-winter… have to say i’m a white chick and I love my Outdoor Performance Wear. It even has pit zippers…
yeah. i love being a white person and having outdoor performance gear BECAUSE it is really amazing! i do randomly go snowshoeing and such…but even if i didn’t these clothes are superior….all clothes should be made like outdoor performance clothes….i think a nice starter onto this white person trend is the SIGG bottle…
I’m a white person and wear clothes that I actually need for the situation but they are Carhartt or Filson not the performance stuff mentioned.
Could be a ballsack
Stuff White People Like:
Bitching at other people to feel better
Yo, about those SIGG bottles… I, too, am intrigued by them: anything more you know about that intrigue?
I love this. My husband can never be found without performance clothing on the weekends, down to the boxers. I find it endearing.
I can’t believe you didn’t mention sun protective clothing. Not only do we have to wear performance clothing, it now has to be made from natural fibers (coconut is the latest – see TUGA), have sun protection factor upf 50+ and have odor control.
I know everyone suggests more stuff:
– Netflix (no messy interacting with the help)
– PBS
– Messenger bags
– Theme parks esp water parks
– Usless baby gadgets
– Wine with ironic or downright silly names (cote de bone, seven deadly zins)
– Designer diaper bags that can’t be washed like petunia picklebottom (wth – a diaper bag you can’t wash??)
– Expensive chain diet plans
Too funny. I read this to my husband and stated that I had my UGGs, but my Northface was purple. His response was that it was because I was only 1/2 white. (I’m 1/2 hispanic, too.)
College White Girl Staples clarified:
1) Fleece North Face Jacket (as displayed in picture) in any of these colors: Turqoise, Black, Pink, Purple, sometimes Blue….most of the time in Black
2) Uggs (short for UGLIEST P.O.S. shoes ever!!!)
3) DMB (Dave Matthews Band for us non white people) sticker for the most likely green colored VW Bug.
~G
p.s. These are the same girls who insist that they grew up in the hood/ghetto.
I know a crap load of people who wear “Carhartt” insisting its because they need the quality for whatever. Yet none of them work construction, or on ranches or anything similar to that in their day to day activities that would make them need some burley jacket/jeans to withstand the elements…it’s pretty funny.
~G
I’m white and I love REI and the North Face. But so do alot of Japanese so what does that mean?
Asians have their own stereotypes:
i.e. Stuff Asian People Like:
#1 Designer Accessories
i.e. how many Asian women (Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Korean) have you seen with Louis Vuitton purses…sure you see a few of them sporting other brands..but 9/10 it’s LV.
~G
Here is the deal….
Having lived in Seattle for many years, I have been accused (by many out-of-towner, non-partakers of the great outdoors) of subscribing to a particular fashion tries (unsuccessfully according to them) to overtly shun fashion.
It’s this notion of wear clothes based solely on their performance qualities and not giving any consideration to their “look” or “appropriateness.” These hecklers—usually people who subscribe to the old “fashion over function” way of dressing—then construe my wardrobe as being a “fashion” in itself. Evidently performance clothes fans ironically “create” a fashion based in trying to reject fashion. (If at this point, you think what I have outlined is really dumb and a lame attempt at a “sophisticated” argument to try and place practical-minded people in a camp little better than those who spend all their money on Louis Vuitton luggage and Prada shoes then….you and I agree).
For most people who wear performance clothing wherever they go it is because they started out like the rest of the world wearing blue jeans, leather jackets and cotton shirts. Then they started to enjoy mountaineering, snowshoeing and kayaking. They quickly realized that blue jeans and leather jackets really suck as you climb Mt. Adams. So instead of buying a $90.00 pair of jeans for “back-to-school” the next year, they bought a waterproof breathable jacket, so they could use it on Mount Rainier next summer. After their Rainier climb, they return home to hang their wonderful coat in the closet, returning to their leather jacket for “around-town” use. Then when they are running errands in the rain, it dawns on them….leather coats SUCK. They feel really dumb owning such a wonderful coat at home yet still using this inferior product because that’s what’s fashionable. So…..they revert back to their high quality waterproof breathable even just for running to the gas station.
It’s like tasting bananas from Southeast Asia and finally realizing that bananas in American grocery stores are just plain BLAND. Having tasted the sweet, they go on to buy sneakers and even dress shoes with Gore-Tex in them. They shun cotton T-shirts and look for something…anything synthetic, until they are a performance clothes-person (oh and I guess they are “white,” too, right?????).
So go on haters, make fun of people who like to wear Salomon shoes, Ex Officio pants, and Marmot jackets. Call us “white”! We don’t care! We’ll make fun of you for wearing $100.00 blue jeans that transport you to a living hell whenever it rains and they get even a little wet (if you don’t know what I’m talking about it’s because you have not tasted the sweet….sorry). Please keep us up-to-date on of our “fashion”…. yeah…the one we didn’t know about until you told us. And please, by all means PLEASE load up on some tofu-flavored Chiquita bananas at the grocery store this weekend.
At the University I attend seriously 25% of the student body wears The North Face fleeces, just like the ones in the photo above. I’m not going to say there is not a sigle white person who wears one, but take note: 99% of the people who wear these on my campus are “Asians” and “African Americans.”
Don’t you hate sterotypes.
Oh Well.
shut up jon
On the whole camping thing, although I did once bring my laptop [Mac ofc] car-camping in the ‘wilds’ of Ontario I was living with a really white woman who didn’t really like it that much [she of the Nalgene, metal cap plastic bottle].
On another personal note and more recently, I have to admit to marathon training while camping … and I’ll do it again.
Does the kind of Stuff White People Like include things like
Truth, Equality, and Justice?
http://www.survival-international.org
oh god this is so true, especially in san francisco. The less rich white people drive a subaru outback or a vw. Richer ones drive a volvo, saab, or prius…. often with a thule rack
coming from a college campus (IU) built on a foundation of white people in north face fleece ‘poser-formance’ gear, I really appreciated the explanation of their strange ways… ^_^ thanks.
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Upper crust white people love outdoor performance clothes that harken safaris.
I pooped my pants
Doh, I pooped my pants
that, made me poop my pants
Woo-Hoo! SIGG Bottles! I have one to match every Patagonia Fleece in my closet… I keep a few stored in my Thule box on top of my Subaru along with my Montrails, flip flops and an extra jacket for those impromptu hikes or trips to the beach. Seriously.
Preach it I do shit tons of camping I love REI I have been a member since they began. I she crap tons of people who shouldnt be allowed to come within a mile of the store but there the one jockin our clothes getting into the bmws never touching the backcountry
OMG, this is funny.. I’m black & just started dating a black guy and this is all he wears.. I’m thinking to myself, ‘he must hang around a lot of white guys.’
Does this site apply to preppy people?
Yes and No. Yes in the fact that they know about it and want to tell people about it. But no in the fact they themselves don’t want to do hard work needed to complete it.
huh?
giggle
As Steve said, I do like bricks. Obviuosly, you can tell I am white from my likes. But, since I live in Texas, I have no clothing of the type referenced by this topic. I hate you northerners, and if you come to my house (or my state) I will shoot you. With a gun. A real one, not one of those paint-ball or water-gushing guns. I will use a rifle like the ones used in old-timey westerns.
more me
Why did Sorority girls have to ruin my favorite rock climbing jacket, argh!!!!!
HAAAA
HILARIOUS!!!!
Coming from New England states,
and especially on college campuses,
we’re all sporting these lovely “OUTDOOR performance” clothes.
HAAA
The down vest is also great when riding a Harley-Davidson in cold weather.
Nathan, I believe you are saying some painful truth. At least I hope it is painful to someone.
I was thinking the same thing, suburban. I have been white almost all my life but I never have known anyone like the “outdoor” types in this blog. WWWPD What would white people do. That is a complicated question. I am not like a lot of the white people blogging here. I like burgers and homebrew after riding on my motorcycle. What makes one a white person anyway. Johnny and Edgar Winter are albinos, which by definition, makes them whiter than me. Ask them what they like. I’ll bet not what these skiiers and posers like.
Ya Freak!
See…you don’t even realize it…YOU are one of them! You think because you wore that jacket a little earlier that you are different and that THEY ruined it for YOU, but…..you….are……THEY.
Fantastic post. We DO like to be ready for anything.
http://thebigstick.wordpress.com/
White people love declaring how “over it” they are. Look at all the “phoning it in” post. White people also like quoting.
most of my outdoor gear is from REI and I had to buy various outfits for each outdoor activity because of this reason…funny but true.
sad, i’m usually the only black girl out there doing jumps on a half pipe though and rock climbing over water
Ya I work at a Patagonia store which is located “downtown” and I am always amazed at the white girl who can’t understand that the expensive hi-per fleece she wants (obviously cause she is a high performance gal) does not come in XL. Now because I work at the store I am obviously never wearing anything else….hmmmm…actually maybe that is why I got the job, so i could afford to outfit myself in the stuff! I also like to believe Im saving the environment by wearing Patagonia which is also very trendy these days. I dont know if this is restricted to white people…a lot of our customers are not white, I think its just a city thing…people are confused and dissatisfied with city life so they like to pretend they are getting out. It’s like the fake tan…hi-per clothing is a signifier of free time and leisure which we rarely have these days.
Someone get “Seattle-Guy” a beer.
Lighten up, my friend. CLANDER is making fun of a *subset* of performance-gear wearers. Not you…
Surely you can appreciate the inanity of someone in Phoenix wearing a high-performance raincoat… right?
I’m an azn female married to one of these “white people” and he mentioned that not only do white-ies like outdoor clothing, they love camping, boating and picnics on the beach. things you certainly won’t catch people of other ethnicities doing unless somehow forced. could be good to blog about.
oh yes, golfing and polo t-shrits. don’t forget that.
rotfl
LMAO!
HA FreaKin NORTH face u calleD it.. Looks Good when worn SLeeVeless with New BAlance shoes
i think this is definitely a case of american white people. i can always pick the americans here in melbourne because they are all wearing north face jackets at all times of the year. seriously, it’s pretty warm in australia. who needs a fucking fleece?
you are not alone but you jave away your age
At Microsoft everyone wears fleece to work – even if they aren’t white. Does that mean Microsoft is a white company? Or is Seattle exempt from this white people rule because of the weather?
Spooky.
Can we include SUV’s in this category? Is there anything more stupid than driving a fourwheel drive assault vehicle in the city? But then, you never know when you might have to go off road in the downtown.
yo dude, I think this article was about you – don’t try to make it an us and them – we are all in this together.
Uh… “local”? Patagucci was originally creatred by Chouinard in tandem with what is now Black Diamond. Then some jackass sued him, going after the revenue generated by the clothing sales, so he split teh etchnical gear from the fluff. I don’t care where the headquarters are, but Patagonia has not been a “local” brand since that fateful event. The last time they were “local” was when they were located in Boulder, CO and the wool hats were still hand-knit by some chick who lived nearby. People don’t sue “local” brands because they don’t have anything to sue until the big IPO.
Ditto for Nau, Columbia, MountainSmith, and any other company that sells nationwide in REI. Hell, REI has even ceased to be the place I grew up (the “scary” store in downtown Seattle that no longer exists)
REAL men and women make and tape thier own technical gear, like my momma did before REI pussed out and stopped carrying Goretex Fabric and down stuffing.
Show me your summit of Denali and then I’ll believe you’re qualified to make that statement…
OH, but global brands are local? Mmm-kayyyy. I guess Star bucks is local too, and doesn’t brainwash anyone at all?!?!
Get ye some Danger Monkey and wake up Dudette!
Here in Denver, folks wear thier technical gear to and from the office, so there’s no real way of telling whether we’re really “working.”
Then again, it could be that we waer our fancy-pantsy outdoor stuff because we see no need to buy some stuffed up wool tweed overcoat when no one gives a damn anyway. We could easily spend that $300 on a few biners or a new pair of hiking boots instead of worrying about what someone thinks of our Northface shell.
Apparently we also don’t give a damn about typing… mine sux.
I don’t know what a biner is, but why spend $300 on hiking boots?
Exactly, all white people love them
That was a really white comment. Who actually knows the what Patagucci is, let alone the history!
WTF?
How can a fleece perform? I have a fleece from Wal-Mart that has Scooby Doo on it and I bet it can “outperform” North Face baby!
I’m half-white, and I go hiking (on the rare occasions that I do go hiking) in regular shirts, sweaters and jeans.
I had been wondering what you did…
So right…so completly right. Well said.
Timberlands, Nautica, Polo and Tommy Hilfiger can all be considered outdoor clothing.
Interesting topic. I don’t quite understand how this is relavent but I don’t think this is as mainstream as most others. I don’t know I guess its applicable though.
you should see 80% of the Asians in the SF bay area. they fit this bill to a T…
She probably means bindings. They connect to your snowboard and keep your fabulous Burton boots in place. ;p
Agreed! Tank not necessary!
or biner like carabiner for rock climbing. duh.
“Biner” is definitely a caribiner for rock or ice climbing.
Sad that somehow rock climbing did not make the list of stuff White people love…
Anyway, I resisted fleeces and shells and all of that for a long time after I started climbing, but I have to say that the synthetics and fleeces, etc. do make a lot more sense when one is spending the day outdoors.
These days, the woman I am dating (Asian, of course)frowns on my wearing my comfortable (dry and warm) outdoor gear around NYC – even when I am not working.
Have to give her credit though. I do look better.
Hey, as a climber, I like the popularity of this stuff, as it keeps the prices down and funds innovation for us!
And you’re right, Mountain hardware and Marmot are my first choices for serious 2-3 week expeditions to mountain ranges. I do like my comfort when camping on glaciers and mountain ledges!
Eugene has got them drippin’ in polypropelene, patchwork and Pendelton.
“And you’re right, Mountain hardware and Marmot are my first choices for serious 2-3 week expeditions to mountain ranges. I do like my comfort when camping on glaciers and mountain ledges!”
One wonders if this gent – when he comes down from these 2-3 week expeditions on glaciers and ledges – makes special effort to sup on delectable food produced by aboriginal and folk artisans.
How amazingly white.
While wearing their “performance clothes” they are driving their 4 wheel drive vehicles that have never been put in 4 wheel drive mode.
I just had a outdoor performance clothes sighting on sunday here in chicago. It was a balmy 82 degrees and humid, but this devoted white couple were wearing their matching north face fleece jackets outside. I mean its cute and all to match with your mate while holding hands, but isn’t there a point when us white people put away our north face jackets and pick up our flip flops???
This one is by far my favorite.
Although I am guilty of about a dozen of these, I think this blog is both genius and hysterical. I know far too many of “my own kind” that fit into 90-100% of these observations.
Are you white, black, half-rican?
Is your book going to be bound copy of the website, or is there going to be new stuff?
I do have one criticism however. You forgot one of the whitest activities of the new millennium: BLOGGING!!!
This could be the whitest thing I’ve ever read.
Flawless victory!
“Watching the ING Marathon, dining al fresco, or walking through Central Park to a museum are my versions of interacting with nature.”
Are you serious? You don’t need the “hi-per” gear. The only thing whiter than running a marathon – unless you finish in the top 3 – is watching a marathon?
Museums – white
al fresco – white
Three strikes; you’re white!
“North Face is an Asian thing, not a white thing.”
I have to agree with you on this. I spent a few years in Japan during the mid 90s and everyone was wearing the “puffy coat”, as we called it.
As stated in previous categories, whites like Europeans and the Japanese, so it’s quite acceptable to imitate their trends. Look how popular sushi became in the white community!!
I also believe I heard a reference to Yoshinoya Beef Bowl in the movie Juno.
add to the list of stuff white people like:
flip flops
Hummers
Outbacks
Chacos
Labrador Retrievers
Living in a Ski town “out west” post college
going to weekend -long outdoor music festivals
wearing designer jeans
flipping their collars up
drinking heavily
exclusive clubs
paying lots of money for their slutty college age daughter to make her “debut”
the list goes on….
and I am white….
freaking hilarious!
I found a cool site for outdoor clothing, not to mainstream yet really cool. goto: http://www.revoint.com
Did it ever occur to you that maybe these clothes are just comfortable? Just a thought.
SO TRUE!!
especially in northern california
people who’ve never set foot on dirt, with all kinds of gear and high performance clothes. do you really need a $300 northface jacket for going shopping on saturday?!
just another way to spend a lot of money on the best stuff we “deserve”
This is EXACTLY like my old boss.
Thanks again… another post that hit the nail right on the head.
i love white people so much. i wish i was white.
funny!
Hate camping. Hate polartec or polafleece anything. Would rather get bitten by a snake and die than let a pair of Tevas get anywhere near my feet.
I hate to discredit you but….
WHAT ABOUT LULULEMON?!??!
Does it count as a horrible white person thing if you wear those clothes (or use any of these white people things)because you actually need them? I only wear that stuff when I’m out in the kayak, and I do actually kayak. Similarly, my parents own an SUV, but if you live in the frozen north of Michigan it’s awfully hard to get a sports car through 80 miles of snow and ice.
God, this is hilarious (and painfully accurate).
In defense of ‘outdoor performance gear’–some of us honkies do actually get outside every now and then. And the stuff holds up really well! I’m still wearing the same fleece zip vest from Patagonia (or Pat’ll-cost-ya, as we used to say) that I bought as a college sophomore (private school, donchaknow) back in ’92, along with the same Vasque boots and many other articles of Marmot, Mountain Hardware, and REI gear owned for between 5 and 15 years (the North Face stuff was still holding up well too, but I had to let it go after it became popular with the hip hop crowd–not that I have anything against black people; I love Barack Obama and Dave Chapelle! And The Wire, too! I love that show! Keepin’ it real, yo!).
Dude, you have me nailed so hard. I never realized just how white I am until I found this website. Thanks for the laughs–
I live in Alaska. The uniform here is North Face jackets and Carhartts.
I confess – u have nailed me.
My only defence is that I actually do like to do outdoor stuff for real.
And I suspect it aint only a white thing.
More a personality thing.
Oh by the way…. after extensive research over 40 years into every conceivable type of outdoor jacket – my conclusion is that North Face stuff aint that good for actually going outside in.
I dont know if u can get Paramo gear in the states – but u really really should be able to – its about a million times better than Goretex, Sympatex, extremelydryyettotallybreathabletex, Humoungoustex etc etc.
And trust me – it rains a lot here so I know 🙂
ps I dont work for Paramo
what prison did you do time in?
You’re white, alright.
It’s important for everyone to remember that white people *love* to camp. If you want to be best friends with a white person, camping is one of the best ways to achieve that.
I know someone like this. I had to ask them a favor that required them giving up 1/2hr of their weekend and it was like a windfall disaster visiting them because now they won’t be able to hike patagonia at the drop of a hat, if their old college mate calls them up, who is living abroad in algeria but may be in the americas so there is the potential of the two getting together in Argentina on Sunday afternoon to plan their expedition. bottom line, selfishness reins supreme.
White people also like organic cotton tees.
http://www.cafepress.com/day_earth/5202037
I’m a horrible white person because I wear those clothes (PataGucci, e.g.) but that is because I am a white liberal who either waits for the bus or rides my bike to my destinations and has spurned the dry-clean-only culture.
But yes Alanna I think at present it’s mostly white people and inuits who kayak. And non-whites have not been attracted to settle in the northern tier.
But white people don’t go around in giant Timberland boots with the laces untied (unless they are in Alaska).
The only thing white people like more than outdoor performance clothing is winter outdoor performance clothing, especially paired with summer clothing. For instance, I went to an Ivy League school, which white people love, where the uniform was NorthFace or Patagonia fleeces (depending on their solidified New England boarding school preference) with shorts and Reef flip flops, even in the dead of winter! Of course, there was always the outdoor performance backpack to fully accessorize the look, for the sport of walking to their luxury, high performance SUVs!
This (like NB shoes) is for country white people. It’s called class, and you old navy fleece people don’t have it. You can’t vote Obama in ’08 if you wear fleece or crocs. if you like to vaca in Europe, you better not wear this tard cloth (unless you’re going to Scotland or somewhere cheesey). Don’t let me catch you in France in your New Balance shoes dummy.
you forgot to mention Cabela’s, which is where i get all my clothes. we just went back the US for our semi-annual trip and stocked up on lots of new clothes from Cabela’s. since i don’t actually work, i wear bush clothing every day. i’ve been in the bush in places like Laos (where i nearly got stomped by an elephant).
Just for the sake of, a misplaced sense of fairness, and that only in regards to, well lying to you , but in a fasion that allows me to let you believe that I give a damn, while I walk away…
But there is this other web site that was probably started before you arranged yours, called blackpeopleloveus.com
and i’m going to be very sure that they have attemted to allow you to contact yourself , and encourage such by creating the site that they would expect your site to encourage.
Myself, i am only interested in the aspects , so far, of fasion and performance wear clothing. I do feebly believe that I can sense a little more freedom in maneuvourabillity, and sweat evaporates differently, yes.
In fact i hear that gatorade has become an entirely seperate country alltogether.That’s what i heard recently, at the free rifle night NBA game.
If you can identify a site where i might be able to purchase a new set of sweat glands, i would be grandly appreciative.
Meanwhile i’ll just be perusing your lovely site, and hoping that i locate an article on some of my actual favorite things, like… two black men kissing with tongues, or Human Liberation— Animal Liberation Tee-Shirts.
And again, thank you. !?!
If anyone can make any sense of this nonsense they’re doing better drugs than I. I think s smith was pretty wasted when he wrote this. Wow !?!
I once saw an asian family all dressed in the same matching winter clothes. Mom, dad, and their three kids, all identical. When I saw this, I started hearing horror movie music in my head.
Yes this is me too. When I dated all my “White Girl Friends” We wore the same sports wear.
What a great analogy. For the man that is a Puerto Rican. AAAhhh!! That would be me!!!!
Regards,
Frank
I have several fleeces, crocs, bicycling equipment and other apparently white objects. Oh and a ski jacket.
I have always found it funny how there are so many expensive and fancy outdoor nature stores that seemingly don’t reflect any sense of “roughing it” outdoors.
There’s this certain demographic of upper-middle-class outdoor people who enjoy spending a lot of money to hike, camp, kayak, etc…
I’m probably as guilty as anyone for having fancy outdoor shoes or an expensive mountain bike that I just ride to class most of the time. Oh the irony.
Don’t forget – certain brands define themselves by not being down wit’ tha homies, i.e. North Face, Patagonia, Columbia, New Balance etc. That stuff is just NOT ghetto fabulous – and besides, they don’t pay any blacks to endorse their products. So you’d be a sell-out n***a if you wore any of that stuff.
If and when the n****rs do start wearing the above, white people will start wearing other stuff. That’s the way it works.
I’m with you on that…damn hippies!
holy shit Smelly Melly!!! I love that you replied to this!!
visit my blog for a first hand look at the life of a white person, complete with stories from travel, outdoor sports, studying abroad, and Barack Obama –
http://www.levantinesummer.blogspot.com
What about LL Bean?
I don’t like going outside. I don’t think I own any t-shirts or shorts and I def don’t own northface anything. I suck at being white.
It’s so true.
I’m too poor to own a northface or other cool shit. but it’s true.
white women also enjoy wearing yoga pants at any and every oppertunity. if you dont know what Lululemon is, you should google it. white people also really love google, its their perferred search engine.
haha, this is exactly what i thought when i read this! it started in vancouver, so if you live in bc, im sure you know what it is. but its starting to branch out, i live in austin texas right now and they have a lululemon showroom here.
i want 2 making international simple friends
patagucci
ugh! gross
I was recently told in an interview to “next time leave your artist costume at home”. That woman was probably the whitest woman I’ve ever met! But she could never have made me cry like a black woman can.
No, you just suck.
i was just going to add that! lululemon is a must for picking the kids up from school as well.
I have to disagree; I have several North Face backpacks, from a standard day to an external frame, and all of them have been working well from the start. Quality stuff, in my opinion…
but I am white 🙂
I like to fart, too. I fart every day in my office. One time, while I was flying in a state helicopter, at the taxpayer’s expense, and shooting a high powered rifle at defenseless animals, I farted so powerfully, the smell killed the pilot. Luckily the fart was lighter than helium and we floated safely down to the ground where I ate the animals raw. It was soooo tasty that I thought Jesus was there, but He wasn’t. It was just a grizzly who looked like Jesus.
I hate Jews, did you know that? Yes, i’m the Governor but I don’t have to like Jews.
I was a prisoner and don’t you forget it. Having spent years in a North Vietnamese prison makes me totally qualified for the presidency.
My wealthy wife controls me. She made me do it, whatever it was.
I tell so many lies as a candidate, I no longer remember what the hell the truth was.
I think I used to have a sense of honor but I forgot where I left it. I think it was in Keating’s office.
I am a lying old fart. I control everything. I will erase all my files and they’ll never be able to prove any of the crimes I’ve committed. I hate blackpeople, don’t you?
I hate most people, too. I hate you.
Fuck you all.
I’m president pro tem of the Senate. I think that’s like Emperor or something.
Yeah. Black people can’t swim. Oh well. Just more room for me I guess.
A sorority girl ruined your jacket? What? Did she spill her microbrew on it? Or did she let some frat guy sodomize her on your couch on top of it?
Sweet? Mill jacket cred.
Where can I get one of these to go with my goatee and my linux laptop when I ride my one speed bicycle to the organic local coffee shop?
JB.
A black person for whom life is good would show that by the shine of the rims on the supercharged G-Wagen, not by a goofy ass t-shirt.
Brooklyn is so far ahead of everywhere else that black people are like white people and white people are like, hipsters from the future!
I bet they drink grape soda in their pbr though!
I love that arc’teryx! Especially because no black people know that it is named after a prehistoric fossil bird reptile, because they didn’t pay attention in class!
Where I live, there is a Starbucks INSIDE the REI. It’s awesome.
There’s also a free fake climbing rock! Inside a renovated industrial building!
That’s like a white tetragrammaton!
lolllllll
Dear jlw …….this blog is generalised …….dont worry lol
this is a funny post i like it very much i have read almost every post on this site so far i suggest you do to. and when your done with this site visit OShit.Net The Worlds Wildest Videos
What I notice is when white women go jogging they always have to wear ALL the right gear. e.g. Light grey or pink tracksuit pants with double white stripes, a pastel pink or light blue expensive sports T shirt, the ‘right’ running shoes, the ‘right’ hat, sunglasses, sunscreen and of course, an iPod. Far out, it’s not just running for fitness. This is really something else they are engaging in.
Those are the posers who are running for social reasons. The real runners, the ones who competed in school and still run as adults, they look like hell–old shorts, running in their sports bras, etc.
It does annoy me to see people running in cold weather gear when it’s only 55 degrees. You don’t have to dress warm until it drops below 45.
I think blacks like north face coats too, at least in d.c. a few years ago kids were getting killed for their north face puffy coats.
Why is Camping not on this list? I love camping!
i’m not into logowear. fuck northface. every coat is an ad.
Or you might need your Hummer if there is an outbreak of urban warfare.
White people love backcountry camping and long distance hiking. You will *only* see white people thru-hiking the A.T. There might be one black guy per thru-hiking season.
Totally.
LOL … a dude named chip said TOTALLY….
i mean really!
wwwhhhhhaaaaaa???? my brain just kinda tuned out about 2 sentances into that.
You know what another name for hiking is? WALKING.
YESSSS! finally someone is doing an expose about white men and adventure clothing. you guys are unsurpassable in the field of caucasian studies
This is priceless. I love going into Erewhon or some other outdoorsy store and watching people buy $200 soft shells when they KNOW they aren’t hiking anywhere or climbing anything. Gotta be warm and dry in your luxury SUV I guess!
I just got my first piece of NorthFace equipment for a birthday gift so I had to come and read this post again. It’s a back pack that’s actually quite nice, but I’m still getting used to being “one of those guys”. I may black out the logo with a magic marker.
Arcteryx needs to be added to this list. You arn’t truely white and successful living on the westcoast of canada unless you own one, if not several, peices of arcteryx clothing; the cost of which ranges in the $500-800 for a rain jacket. Just take a trip to whistler and soak in the elite white culture.
This site is priceless; I love all this stuff- have an ethnic best friend, know several expensive sandwitch shops, and am chronically thinking I should learn a new language (we also like knowing and using a spattering of any language – particularly when we can show it off at a restaurant to which the food is ingidenous to, even if the server is not!)
Who cares what Canadians do? Dumbass.
The outdoor fashion has reached an all time low when you see people wearing expensive outdoor clothing that will never be used in the outdoors.,,
To each his own..
Although it would be nicer on a rainy day to have a $300 North Face gore-tex rain jacket then a $300 averix, G-unit or other urban coat that can’t keep you dry.
One thing that I have noticed…. Black people spend just as much money on thier clothes, if not more. Its one thing to see a rich white person wearing a $300 coat but another to see a black person collecting welfare checks wearing a $300 coat.
Man you are fucked up.
OMG! same here in nyc! you see SO many blacks wearing expensive The North Face jackets everywhere, and not only the puffy ones, but the ones called “steep tech” which are like 400$. and in general, everyone who wears those expensive the north face jackets probably haven’t even been hiking where you actually NEED those jackets, as opposed to living in the city. its just for fashion now, where a few years back it was exclusivley for hiking ans such. upgrade to patagonia or columbia people.
OMG- that is so funny. Hey “uberwhitevancouverguy” how about you and your ethnic friend shut the hell up and get back to the greenhouse and check on that yummy bud us white people really like.
OMG!!! I work at REI and this is so f-ing true! Thank you!
Another weak post from TWPL. Only in self-hating white America could you retain a readership.
North Face, quintessential outdoor performance clothing, is the universal label of choice in my non-white neighborhood.
LOL! So true.
Agreed…as a high school runner, I always preferred a pair of boxers and any sport bra to be my running uniform. The other crap really served no function…your just going to sweat all over it anyway.
The thing that cracks me up the most is people in the ‘gotta have the latest’ performance clothes that I would often find out of breath and panting, sitting on a bench, as I used to walk quickly past them going up steep hills on my way to varsity, while wearing quite non-performance jeans and shoes and not being out of breath myself. Usually while finishing a smoke at the same time. I have, though, been told by my doctor on several occasions in the past that I in fact possess above average stamina, so that obviously does help, but it does amuse me I have to say, and we have some pretty mean steep hills in NZ… and yes, we would typicallly start from the same point, so no, they didn’t endure some 10 km walk or run somewhere else, we’re talking about people walking out of a shop just after purchasing these high performance clothes in many cases during a break between lectures for example, or turning up to varsity (dropped off in a car) and walking down the hill only to have to walk up again to another lecture 🙂 Slightly pathetic really.
“I have, though, been told by my doctor on several occasions in the past that I in fact possess above average stamina…”
wow. this is a joke right?
this is so true….i leave the house in head to toe yoga gear most days…and im nowhere near my gym
He’s not kidding. I counted two periods in that whole paragraph. The man has staying power!
This is very true. However being a person from the mountains in the west and now living in the city on the east. I don’t feel as foolish wearing my ski jacket and hat when people are using umbrellas to cover themselves from the snow that never even sticks to the ground. You can spot the posers, but then again maybe I look foolish to them. But I still don’t have to carry an umbrealla around wherever I go. FACE!
Woh Bro thats hella cool you are like the most inlightened coolest person. FACE! Now that your on the East Coast stop being a tool.
“you purchase a jacket or some sort of “high performance” t-shirt, which is like a regular shirt but just a lot more expensive.”
I don’t know if this is supposed to be funny or not, but if not its totally wrong.
I’m a white, outdoor guru (ski, kayak, hike, ice climbing, rock climbing, hiking, winter hiking, telemark, snowboard, travel) and high performance gear is NOT just a regular shirt.
It’s gotten to be that high performance gear is more comfortable and better in all conditions, whether it be in the city or in the bush (I regularly go between both).
Funny, I’m a person who has lived in the mountains of the west all my life, and this is the first time I’ve seen anyone say “FACE!” in quite that way.
Look up the definitions of ‘Irony’ and ‘Sarcasm’…
Well said Jules. That was gold.
I’m from the East Coast…and I would like to just say how true this is! I think every girl and guy at my University owns atleast one North Face! Typical outfits for white girls are North Face’s with Uggs and tights. I love how true this blog is. Its hilliarious. I think some white people are getting angry because of how true this is or because they are white and these descriptions don’t fit them so they know how much they don’t fit in as a white person.
Who’s laughing?
Would an “American Dream” Dusty Rhodes tee-shirt qualify as performance sports wear?
This is hilarious. I live in Portland, Oregon: the World Epicenter of the urban/outdoor apparel juxtaposition.
I can appreciate the need for clothing that holds up through camping or hiking treks. And it rains an awful lot here, and the need for called waterproof-breathable jackets is apparent.
But, to paraphrase J. Peterman, how a garment that creates a sauna at 70ºF can be called “breathable” is utterly beyond me.
And why is our outdoor clothing designed to make you look like a walking parachute?
My question is this: Is it possible, (I mean really, fellow white people,) to find durable, outdoor-worthy, waterproof, etcetera jackets and pants without looking like a polyester jet-ski? You know what I mean.
Next is the hiking boots. It’s great to have boots that can handle the wilds as well as the urban landscape, but why the busy-ness of design? Seriously — what is the deal with these overdesigned hiking boots that look like bad sci-fi costuming? What happened to simple leather boots that last for decades, block the rain, and actually have some passable style? What is the function, (if functionality is key,) of designs that wrap your foot in miniature spaceship fantasies of the early ’90s?
This has been my rant. Thank you for reading!
The mild weather conditions that characterize suburban Philadelphia give rise to the need for some intense North Face ski jackets and Uggs. 99% of white people at my university wear this outfit, though I’m pretty sure going to some “tight” frat party in the evening hardly qualifies as an outdoor sporting event.
I liked your rant.
lol@white people from philly. The whole idea is funny.
Philadelphia is a black city, as in everything meaningful in that city is originated, owned, and operated by black people.
Philly has it’s own slang, culture, attitude, and style unique to itself, and has the least interest in what anybody outside is doing than any place I’ve ever seen.
White people just are not part of that unless they grew up around and identify with black people.
White people in those weird white neighborhoods in Philly tend to be phillistines who live on junk food and tallk like they have a sock in their mouth.
Talking about they wanna go to a Phluffy Eagles game and eat a hoagie.
LOL@white people.
White people also love to say “tool” …Aaahh soo funny!
I can’t wait until warmer weather so I can stop making fun of the masses of sheeple wearing north face jackets, tight jeans and Uggs. I’m seeing entire families wearing this garbage.
White people, fleece is cheap and the brand name does not matter. Buy this stuff at Target or Old Navy.
Black people, I lived in Minnesota and didn’t own a parka. Do you really need one on a 58 degree day in the mid-atlantic? Oh, and we all know you bought that fake North Face hoodie at a flea market.
Only white people use the word guru
HAHA you white people are so hilarious. who woulda thought?
haha! My friends and I have discussed this forever!! The way white people wear their gym clothes out everywhere, khaki cargo pants, and flip flops in the wintertime, are just a few of the great mysteries of life.
I gotta agree. Everyone knows you look much more hip wearing an expensive NBA uniform/warm ups (with the shoes of course) around town…you never know when the coach is gonna call you in!
This is good, I’d only say that these white people would like you to believe they would be ready to go kayaking on a moments notice, only they would ALWAYS find an excuse not to go. Like, “Oh, I’d love to go but i’ve got the dogs to feed at 5:00” or “yeah, we have to get the baby to bed by 6:00 so if we were to leave now we wouldn’t be back until like 7:00, then we gotta pick the baby up at my mom’s and by the time we get home and into bed it’ll be too late.”
As if to show that they have more going on and therefore their life is more fulfilling (whiter) than yours.
They are!…I can’t wait to hear the comments on the urban mountaineers who wear their oversized “puffy” jackets down to the 7-11, hilarious!…opps, that ain’t a white thing.
This thing is bs… fullfilled white people know a yakima rack is much better than a thule.
I live in Bend, Oregon (a very white locale) and I wear outdoor clothes because I spend my free time playing outside. Cross country skiing in jeans would suck. Although I’m a little baffled by flip-flops in January…
But I don’t wear my GOOD technical clothes around. We already know how hip and buff we are, no need to flaunt it.
Gotta go now or I’ll be late for yoga…hmmmm..tomorrow just might be a powder day….
Haha, you got me there. But you have to admit, you’d much rather rock that flashy warm-up suit with a fresh pair of Jordans then be caught dead in that plain, old, and ugly khaki shorts/polo shirt/flip flops in the wintertime getup.
At least we’re WARM, though! Don’t be mad because you like to wear your short/sweatshirt combination when it’s 20 below. Get a grip tri2dv8!
There is a website called “Stuff Black People Like” since joking white people makes you all hypersensitive, and joking black people makes you feel good inside :o)
I live in arizona. I dont have a problem staying warm. I dont need to go anywhere to make myself feel better either. someone is hyper sensitive here. Obviously a return volley(white tennis relate) in the same joking matter upsets you. Sorry, I thought this a fun thing, maybe more anger than fun?
I would like to rock that…could I wear my flip flops and still pull it off?
No, no anger. It was just an observation/questioning of motives type thing. If you like to make fun of black people, that’s cool because you know, black people like to make fun of black people just as much as white people do.
Believe me I get much more joy at pointing at white people and their pretentious habits…I am guilty of a lot of these white things..I run for no reason and ride a bike in ugly colored spandex…go ahead and pile on…
Yep, I live in Bozeman, MT. Dude, dont kid yourself – you are as blindingly white as any of us here. I bet you are the guy who has the thule rack, THEN spends and additional $50 to get the wind deflector with the huge Thule logo on the front just to show everyone that your are Mr. Outdoor fiend. No offense, but lets not bullshit ourselves.
So sorry, I drive a Focus hatchback and don’t even have a rack on the thing. I’m not kidding anyone, certainly not myself. I am glaring white, but I work a service sector job.
Perhaps a new entry for the list would be too much education. Though I fancy myself a working-class hero, I’m really a slacker like you, Mr. BozeMan.
The great thing about REI is you can use the stuff you buy for months and break it and they will exchange it for you. 100% guarantee rocks.
We wear blue jeans with holes in them… with Wife beaters and Cut off sleaves and a tin of Red man in our pockets with some sort of anchent Hat prefferbly red with Some kinda tractor Supply endorsement on the top… has to be mesh on the back though.
You obviously don’t know any white people.
How could you have left out the King of all white folk retailers?;
L.L. BEAN.
Sorry, this omission invalidates all of your comments.
Get a white buddy and get outdoors in your cool Bean boots!
I don’t wear any of that stuff. This just goes to show you that the proprietors of this sight have no idea of what they are talking about.
Wow! I really feel that most of these things should not happen..ie: spandex, flip flops, north face jackets..etc. I DO NOT WANT TO BE LUMPED IN OR STEREOTYPED WITH THE REST OF “WHITE PEOPLE”. I have style and refuse to be a part of your generalization….enough! Not all “white people” are clueless, cheesy douche bags that have no sense of what the world is all about. I refuse to be a part of what some frat fuck, Dave Mathews listening, flip flop wearing, beaded necklace wearing, cargo pant having, type A white boy ass bag is. We are not all the same! So, I will be damned if I am going to be included in their ridiculous brood. I’m probably WAY cooler than you fuck face!
Gotta love people with anger issues and no sense of humor. Not saying this blog is hilarious, but you have to be able to laugh at yourself sometimes. So you may not fit every stereotype here… congratulations. Guess what? You’re white. You might as well go out and get a Dave Matthews CD and a Northface polar fleece, host a dinner party, and join the crowd. Welcome to the fold.
is it necessary to mention how often teenage white girls will wear yoga pants to school but never do anything physically strenuous that requires such pants?
If you are going to miss the point, then do it to the acme of your potential.
You are an inspiration.
you should go read the article about getting offended – I think you may have reached the pinnacle
yes because white people are the only ones who buy North Face 🙂
No, they wear these clothes not to be ready at a moment’s notice to head out to the real country, they wear these clothes as a form of conspicuous consumption. They are saying: see, I don’t need to dress in old haut bourgeois weekend casual clothes, because I go out to Aspen (or Park City, or some other far off trendy place) and this is what I would be wearing if I were there. (Never mind that I only go once a season, or once every two years, I want you to think that it was just some huge deal at work that has kept me in NYC, so I am wearing my ski jacket to dinner on the Upper West Side, or I have on my fleece vest, even though I have just been to an indoor gym).
When I walk around campus, I see people wearing their outdoor performance clothing and I feel like I should take mine off and just go cold so that I dont look like them. Its a real shame, I earned the right to wear this type of clothing by spending 3 weeks straight in the wilderness, free climbing a 5.10c, and such. Performance outdoor gear is something you earn the right to wear, simply buying it does not mean that you earned it.
OH MY GOD YOU’RE GAY
wow, you just made yourself a perfect example of this article and why would you need to wear it after you are DONE climbing? honestly, you earned the right???
ok i think this site is sweet, but honestly you’re not the writer and lets keep it that way.
It’s good stuff. It lasts a long time. I live in an unpredictable climate, so it’s functional. Please get over yourself. Is this really the kind of shit you worry about?
You can’t go anywhere near downtown Ann Arbor, MI (University of Michigan campus) without seeing every other girl-LITERALLY- in her North Face, Uggs, and stretch pants. Ok, so fugly Ugg boots and North Face jackets and coats are warm during the winter months…but stretch pants? Nope. Sorry. Just go to your mailbox and back in these during the winter and tell me if your legs and ass are still as toasty as your Ugg covered toes. I think not. In fact, I know they are not.
OK this is one thing that has always annoyed me about white people (and I’m a WP myself).
Why do white people wear bike shorts? Do we really have to look at your balls whenever you ride your bike? Why can’t you just wear normal clothes?
Why do white people get really into biking? They buy an expensive titanium bike, get fancy lyrca clothes, and ride around in packs of bikers.
Wooowwww. You are suuuper cool. Can we hang out and wear performance apparel together?
This is a prime example of why these white people (I’m white but not like the ones discussed in this blog) can be so damned irrational. They buy expensive outdoor gear that does no better than their regular clothes and they probably never use anyways. If you want real outdoor gear go to the Army Surplus store. It’s cheap, serves its purpose, and oh yeah, you’re RECYCLING! But I don’t think recycling applies with these white people when they’re recycling from the military. That gives me an idea…
Want to dick with a white person? When you see them drinking a can of soda, say: “Isn’t recycling amazing? The aluminum used in that can may have once been part of a B-52 bomber.” Tell me what happens cause I don’t know anyone who would be freaked out by this fun fact.
Why don’t they just use cars? They’ve gotta get a hybrid, even though any reasonably sized regular car does fine on emissions and mileage for half the price. It’s the price, man. They assume expensive=good.
So, what would be OK for girls on campus to be wearing? Do you ever see a girl on campus and go, that person is dressed “just right” for this occasion of going to class or the library – they are not too trendy, not too different, but not like everyone else either… I’m honestly wondering, what would THAT look like?
So, I think this site in general is clever and funny, but does anyone else think that making fun of clothing is a little bit too easy, and maybe has too much in common with a “what not to wear” episode? I mean, what could I actually wear as a white person (or as any person) and NOT be made fun of? Too common, too uncommon, made in China, made locally, copying someone else’s culture, too bourgeios, trying to be elitist, trying to NOT be elitist, too trendy, trying to hard to NOT be trendy, trying to hard to look “unmade”. Maybe I’m taking this too seriously, but could someone suggest something I could wear as a white person that wouldn’t enable someone to go, “OMG look at that, she’s SO white!”?
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A T-shirt that said OMG look at that, she’s SO white!”?? hahaha I would buy that shirt. But yeah I see your point. Anything anyone wears is subject to ridicule. Although the time I wore a I Support Single Mothers T-shirt (it had an outline drawing of a stripper on a pole) that one was mostly met with laughter since of course it played into the stereotype and I don’t. (I’m a single mom but not a stripper in case you were wondering). Not that I have a problem w/ that. =)
I’m proud to say that I don’t own any Northface stuff…but I do own a few pieces of Arc’Teryx and a sick hooded 66 degrees North fleece jacket because they are still expensive and rare enough that you won’t see 100 people wearing the same thing you are just walking around town. I wear this stuff because it lasts, looks good and most importantly will be functional when I do get the chance for outdoor activities. Even though I avoid being a TNF trendwhore…I guess I’m a different kind of outdoor gear snob.
Yeah, I’d say you’re taking this a bit too seriously. You must be white!
i love this site and particularly this subject. I think its hilarious that on my campus, University of kansas, the look is uggs, tights and TNF fleece. maybe the cool girls will flex a pattie instead of TNF. I think the girls look hot in that uniform, but im irrationally automatically annoyed by each of them before they say a word, while loving it when they smile at me in my skin tight jeans and outdoor gear i know they have never heard of (think arc’teryx and penfield). Maybe im a snob too, cause i know that in the cities i go to, everyone knows these brands and i would not be able to get away with looking down my nose at all these hideous fucking Denauli jackets just because im wearing something a tad more obscure. 10 years ago my big bro was rocking denauli jackets and they were ill. I suppose time changes everything because he wears poonjabis now.
why does it have to be white folks!! thats wear everyone gets wrong!! yall get tired a bein stereotyped when yall doin it yallselves!!!
Try riding a road bike in boxers and let me know how it feels.
I bike because I like to work out and I like the speed.
A biner is a Mexican. Or possibly short for carabiner. Either way, they’re both best when hanging from something.
there are one too many yalls in momo’s comment. the sterotypes are ridiculously true in this. Maybe it’s more geared towards yuppie fools, but you have to admit the reality behind these stereotypes!
christie-
Ridiculously true or not…but why should we amit reality behind white stereotypes when other races won’t do the same? Personally I see hispanics, asians and blacks wearing this kind of stuff…but the reality is that far more white people wear it. (just don’t tell any non-whites I said so….it would make me a race traitor. 🙂 )
I love it. I have a NorthFace jacket. I bought one for my wife this past Christmas…..and we live by the water, so of course, we’re active.
Something else white people like: [indoor] rock climbing … the colonial overtones are just too good… pleeeease write a post about this… if not, ill write a guest one and you can even take credit : )
White people dress up in brightly colored clothing just to ride their bikes.
That’s because there are too many dipshits on the roads who would not see us otherwise. Of course, there is always the assclown who almost kills me, then tells me: “I didn’t see you.”
I usually reply that they should look past their nose.
when i was walking home today I saw two white women who had the exact same north face fleece.
hilarious!
hi , funny site . i think its important to be able to laugh at ourselves, we certainly have a good laugh at “y’all “
I just moved from Colorado to a warmer state. I now feel like a douche for having my Jeep, REI wardrobe, and BPA free Nalgene bottle. I actually have a tattoo that says “Never Stop Exploring” with a sun and snowflake. I majored in Geology at the U of Colorado. I never considered myself a yuppie or a hippie. I’ve been ice climbing, love rafting, and have backpacked for 2 weeks straight many a time (a lot of my classes required it!). I did trade my mountain bike in for a hybrid, but I will still feel like a douche now that I see the “poserformance” attitude had by others.
that happens like once a week to me at my college
The occassion is irrelevant. I only notice the HOARDS of girls that are dressed in identical uggs, stretch pants and north face fleeces. Unless this phenomenon has not overtaken your local campus… Then by all means, wear this outfit to your hearts content. The problem is that this suprisingly popular ensemble is just an unflattering clusterf*ck of fads reinforced by those feeling the need to be accepted and trendy. Were it not for the alarming number of girls wearing this uniform around here I wouldn’t take a second glance.
Uhh… who do you mean by “y’all”? Is that like some kind of quasi-redneck reference to non-white people?
What’s da difference? Colorado is a failed state that is filled with duoches.
Q: What’s worst than being in Colorado?
A: Having Colorado come to you 😉
Sorry christie it might’ve slipped up at my dinner party, I understand if you’re offended and feel the need to move to Canada, how ’bout we have you over we can watch Arrested Development and talk about how terrible high school was. Then i can help paint your house. What do you say?
So true. They hog the back roads in rural North Carolina where I live. It’s like they’re training for the Tour de France while their over scheduled kids are being tortured in Saturday French language class. (See #115)
85% of women at Dayton wear the same north face fleece
It feels fine, put your balls away please
This site pretty much embodies every ding dong I grew up with. Love it. I’d like to say that I want to move where there is NOONE around me at all, but even by saying that, I just sound like another white person threatening to move to Canada.
Believe me, there are millions of such people in Canada. North Face is practically the national uniform.
Happens in Melbourne, Aust, when they are riding to work. They have advertising and all. Some only have to go a few kilometres.
City people even wear leather skin coats, and white jeans when they go to the county, even though no one in the county wears them except on TV.
The North Face makes me angry … people wearing that stuff look like real BBQ stoppers (i.e. NO FUN).
kodee, being black, i can’t even begin to imagine your life – you are a true testament to the authentic outdoor performers – hats off to you. but yeah, i can understand why you must feel like a douche. i guess as long as you know you’re the real deal, that’s all that matters? not really huh?
That is so funny…..
http://messedupparentingtips.wordpress.com/
You mean to tell me I shouldn’t wear this stuff at work?!!!?
hahahahhahha!
I had never heard of any of those brands… except The North Face, because in high school I got a scholarship to an elite private school and found myself surrounded [and outnumbered] by all of the rich kids’ Eddie Bauer monogrammed backpacks and North Face fleeces.
Oh, and New Balance shoes!! HA!!
[humorlessprick]
TNF, as it currently stands? Aspiration and status.
Typical bourgeois white Americans: “We’re soft and plump, but we fancy ourselves to be the outdoorsmen/women of the ads we obviously COULD be if we didn’t have to sit in this cubicle all day. It’s a good thing that they finally fixed the cut on this new jacket… it’s a perfect perforamance fit!”
Bourgeois non-white Americans: “We want to be treated like white bourgeois.”
Poorer non-white Americans: “This is what everyone else seems to be wearing, so we better wear this ‘Nonth Face’ jacket we picked up in Chinatown, lest we seem different…”
Blue-collar white Americans: “Yuppiewear. We WORK in our Carhartts.”
Ghetto-dwellers of all ilk: “Yo, this shit is $500 f*cking bucks! Chug that Dom…”
Chic urbanites/hipsters: “Outdoors wear? TNF? Eww. That is so mainstream and so not twee. Pass the PBR.”
Outdoorsmen/women: “Mainstream poseurwear. TNF sold out many years ago after is was acquired by vanity Fair. Look at the cut on this thing. This this was made to accommodate a gut!”
[/humorlessprick]
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE who seem to WASTE their money on outdoor performance clothes.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
Underarmor FTW
I don’t know if David Sedaris, The Simpsons or South Park ever tackled this phenomenon, but The Onion sums-it-up:
Bag up your trashed Marmot, Moonstone and Patagonia, when it don’t fit any more after all that microbrew, kasha knish and Mediterranean grub, and drop it off at the 2nd hand store. So us actual white people can wear it standing in line at the empty shelved soup kitchen (our pride’s a pretty tenuous thing, and we can hide our Tasers and H&K P7 M13s under the snow skirt.)
I love outdoorsy people who think that nobody else could possibly be outdoorsy and thus should not be wearing outdoor gear. The worst culprits of this are people who work “inside” at gear shops and have superiority complexes
I also think its funny that everybody is talking about fleece on this thing.
Nobody wheres fleece anymore. Now its all lightweight down and synthetic.
Wrong.
Cabela’s is in the same class as Gander Mtn and Bass Pro Shop. Advanced white ppl would not be caught in these stores because they cater to hunters, fishermen and people who actually spend the majority of their time outdoors and do not care what they look like.
I think it is more Veblinism (conspicuous consumption). It isn’t to be ready to go off at a moment’s notice, it is to advertise that the wearer can afford a third or fourth wardrobe and can afford adventure vacations or enjoy active weekends, because someone else is: mowing the lawn, picking up shirts, doing housework, doing the scutwork at the office that they once had to do. If one can do active sports, and seeks not to rub it in, when not engaged in them one would wear an old tweed jacket and an oxford shirt.
I don’t know too many people who don’t know Columbia Sportswear, REI, Mountain Hardware, or Patagonia.
I’m almost certain Allison is not from West Coast…: )
we usually wear a strap on phallis, or a lingerie to get us in the mood, never heard of these outdoor action wear for those dumb whites.
Damn! I am white. I love my outdoor performance clothing for the simple reason that I might suddenly need to take part in a marathon or track down a wild beast in the forest… Watch out you wild animals. My imitation bare foot shoes and I are coming for you (right after I finish drinking my coffee and studying for my liberal arts degree)! http://stuffzachlikes.com/2009/08/29/2-vibram-five-fingers-shoes/
I hate when little boys wear outdoor performance clothes…
put alil love in your heart
😉
I hate when little boys wear outdoor performance clothes too. They make it hard for me to get to their dicks to suck..
put alil love in my ass…
How about chacos? Worn by white eco-posers everywhere.
I wear a Columbia button up dress shirt for you with my Northface cargo shorts
i love my north face fleece, i’m wearing it now even tho it’s 100 degrees in the computer lab…
i hate outdoor activities tho, does this make me less white?
Your fucking joking about this website here right.. Your worse than the deusche bags you talk about..
White people hate Ed Hardy LMFAO you are a dumb fuck.. He is white and only one of the most talented tattoo artist in the world.. You must be from Mars to think that white people do not wear his clothing line or his INK .. You are an ignorant piece of work aren’t you.. Hope someone pushes your face in this week..
calm down dude…..
By the looks of their dress, the couple look like professional bouncers on their way to work…and please don’t upset them about mentioning “business matters”, such as throwing out uninvited guests at the club’s front entrance.
Bored? Go through the list and see if you Like, Dislike, or are Neutral about each entry. Like gets a +1, Dislike a -1, and Neutral 0. The whitest man alive would get a +129, the least white man alive a -129.
My own WQ (Whiteness Quotient) is a 61. I am mixed Irish, Polish, and Italian, raised in the northern United States. I’m curious to see other people’s WQs and racial background.
I usually see North Face mostly on black guys
He wears Ed Hardy. Back away slowly.
Of course not! On the contrary: it is at the very core of whiteness to buy extensive performance clothes and wear them in an air-conditioned, indoor environment.
Marcus… sounds like a black guy.
You fucking racist making fun of my kind. Just because we have a good sense of clothes doesn’t mean you have to be hating on us.
Genius man
Im going to have to say this entire site is hilarious. ALL of you rednecks writing in with your shitty grammar also happens to be HILARIOUS. It adds character to this site. It also proves in fact that white people, white trash for the most part, are self righteous ignorant dip shits. Its funny because you see black people magazines. I always say, “what if there was White People Magazine”. I think black people (along with other races) would be pissed. BUT i am now reassured they would be pissed because all of the white trash would go running around with copies saying “lookit what we made lookit here , we are the best USA wooo freedom” acting like they never shit and piss excellence. i hate ignorant WHITE TRASH. get off your ass and join the military or get a job. get off your weak ass junkie ways. if youre not part of the solution you certainly are the problem. Thanks.
-Super White as you get White Guy.
Speaking of Grammar, as you are mentioning it, it’s “you’re not part of…”. I guess you are also a dipshit. 😉
@ get-a-grip
Ya burnt.
Thats weird because 70% of the black people I know wear north face 100% of the time…
I live in a very white place. By very white, I actually mean 40% caucasian, but despite being the minority in Anchorage, Alaska is just so white. When my rock climbing friends, kayaking friends, fishing friends, hockey friends, ice climbing friends, and skiing friends all get together (invariably wearing synthetic wicking clothes and/or organic cotton from Patagucci), Stuff White People Like, and specifically post 87, is always brought up. Thanks for brightening up our otherwise frozen lives!
white people stink and they all look alike
A true standard in comedy blogging.
Another great site is http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
fuck you
Scathing yet true, but to be honest I like to wear outdoor performance clothes because they last a lot longer than other stuff.
Thanks for the compliment!
Arguing about Gore Tex is also a common trait. I mean, just how much better than other fabrics is it ? And it´s supposed to get wet, right ?
It´s more important to have the right stuff, to look like you´re an outdoor sporty person, than it is to be one. Who wants to go to the wilderness anyway? You get the sun tan in the solarium anyway. And your gym is only a 15 minute car drive away.
Sounds like someones been to Boulder
2005-2007 census recorded just a hair under 70% of Anchorage residents as white, not 40%. But yeah, I am about to put on some clothes that ‘wick’, just in case.
BAWWWWW
THANKS!!! 😉
White people DO wear Ed Hardy. They fit into the Douche Bag category, much like the constant Outdoor Performance Gear-wearers. But they are a particular subcategory of Douche Bag known as the Obnoxious Spray-Tanned Wannabe-Bad-Ass Douche Bag. They are close relatives of the ‘Roided-Out Spray-Tanned Hypnotiq-Swilling Guido Douche Bag. (And, if you must know, I am of the Overly-Fashionable Slightly-Effeminate Underemployed Trust Fund Creative Douche Bag genus, formerly known as “Metrosexual,” a term that seems to have fallen out of favor, both among those of our kind and among the masses. — Nobody can accuse me of being un-self-aware.)
not if you use them the right way, jeez, get some more friends who call you up on a whim to go rock climbing. you must be missing a pea coat or some other trait popular with white people!
you hate ignorant white people because they hate minorities? hate in general seems to be rather ignorant to me. also what are you doing about the issue that there are ignorant people who hate minorities? telling them to go to war doesn’t seem to be much of a solution. something to think about.
Speaking of grammar, you pretentious fuck, you should’ve wrote, “It’s funny because,” not “Its funny because.”
i love wearing northface and im black its no big deal and yes i do like it because its pricey but it does seem like white ppl love it more than any other race i thought it was just me but im glad this book cleared that up! 🙂
Speaking of grammar, I think you intended to say, “you should’ve written, . . . “
haha, true… i’m a hypocrite.
i realized that after i posted this. unfortunately, you can’t remove comments.
Funny, but true, thanks for the perception. I usually get my outdoor performance clothing at http://OutTrek.com -They have the best selection of clothing and gear online, and it’s available for everyone regardless of color, race or origin.
My boyfriend and I were out at a bar in Baltimore, and there was a group of people next to us, and he pointed at a guy was wearing a NorthFace shirt, and he said “A Northface shirt is like a sign saying “I am white.””
I sent him this page just now. Too funny, and true.
Hahah yeah, check out Villanova’s campus, it friggin brutal. It’s their school uniform. All the girls wear preferably black spandex, (chestnut) uggs and North Face fleece or jackets.
They prefer to be with the great outdoor than with familiy members! or around less well-to-do folks.
this is so true, but i feel as if North Face should have its own place. I am at college and there are so many white people who wear them, mainly the fleece. i am white, and i have a North Face 😦
HAAA you just described the Penn sorority girl uniform. Classic.
Same at Emory, and it is the South, so no one really needs Uggs because it never gets that cold.
hahahahah I went to emory and this is so true. the only people who wear uggs are pampered rich girls who have never really been camping once in their lives. no, RVing doesn’t count sorry.
At UNC North Face are so pedestrian that the Greeks abhor the sight of them. It is considered peasantry in comparison to the much more bourgeois Mountain Hardware and Patagonia jackets as fleeces are not expensive enough. Sperrys are the norm although Clarks Wallabees have a cult following as shown by our own adopted Indian to white brethren Anoop Desai who rocked Wallabees throughout the American Idol Competition last year.
I’m loving your options.I have never ever liked North Face coats,but was actually considering buying one ,just for the sake of feeling warmer..Now that I saw your post ,i have rethought that..thanks Embroidered Leisurewear
Northface + Subaru = White Upper Class
@Megan,
I thought it was: Patagonia and not North Face. Here in our quaint mountain town the upscale Northern Lights carries Patagonia while the Bob Wards sporting good store carries North Face clothing. The North Face is so early 2000s!
I was at a fraternity party once and one of the only things I can remember from that night is my friend and I creating a drinking game where we took a drink every time someone wearing a North Face walked through the door.
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@Cinch,
You don’t happen to live in Bozeman, do you?
THANKS!! 🙂
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things black people like: clothes that are too big (somehow really fat black people manage to find seriously over-sized t-shirts while fat white people get one or two shirts custom made and wear them until they fall apart) because they are afraid that at any moment they might get a call that says “Shaq is over and he spilled some pop or something (who knows) on his shirt and we’re playing basketball and I’m skins and he needs a shirt but I’m mexican so my oversized shirt, while almost humorously oversized on me, is still a relatively comfortable fit on him! If you are near and can somehow, some way find a shirt to accommodate him, maybe he will teach us a new way to shake hands that we can stop doing after we see white people do it. I’m still mexican though so I can only do it with you or other black people and then feel very cool in front of other mexicans and especially in front of white people who aren’t tough like we are, right?”
This is spot on. It seems everyone in SW Minneapolis is ready for an impromptu orienteering competition.
More proof that Buffalo is stuck in a time warp: only this year is the SWPL crowd beginning to rock a black North Face Denali.
Black North Face Denalis seem to be the fleece of choice among the late 20s/early 30s yoga mom crowd. Up until now, Columbia was the jacket of choice. There’s no REI stores here (it’s Buffalo, after all, which just got its very first Chipotle) and only a couple of small independent stores that sell Patagonia. You can pick the Canadians out of a crowd easily by looking for MEC and Roots labels.
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What about non-white people who wear technical clothing eh? I’m 1/2 yellow and 1/2 white and I wear a ridiculous amount of technical clothing. Although I always want to go camping, I’m not so stupid as to think my buddy’s going to call an impromptu session of hiking and paddling. I for one wear technical clothing because I’m a paranoid bastard. When those zombies come, you want to be hunkered down in a makeshift shanty dressed in cotton, that retains water and chills you when the temperature drops? I think I’ll stick with my technical clothing. I may look like a douche, but damn yo, how many hipsters look like douches and are just gonna be eaten by zombies because they can’t run in their drainpipe jeans? Sheeit yo, it ain’t just white people wearing clothing that works, that in itself is degrading to people of other shades. What, because I’m 1/2 Chinese I can’t be (paranoia-fuelled) practical? C’mon!!
“hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.”
I’ve done that… many times. Not always Kayaking and camping… last time (the call was to one of my brothers) was a Motorcycle trip and camping that started at 11am on a Thursday when I decided I’d had enough work for the week.
That’s why I always have camping gear in my car… and in the saddle bags on my bike. I didn’t realize that non-white people weren’t allowed to do that… too bad for them.
Damn sensible — pragmatic, not paranoid. Let the zombies feast on hemp-wearing hippies and organic-cotton-lovin’ yogis. You and I are survivors.
White people, well all people, also enjoy http://www.NakedHipster.com. Mainly because the girls are hot and don’t have clothes on. Usually those two things go well together. You know, the hotness and the nakedness…..
Have you considered adding some videos to your article? It will really enhance my understanding. I noticed something too relating to this on another blog.Incredibly, your take on it is diametrically opposite to what I read previously. I am still trying to figure out within the conflicting points of view, but Im tipped heavily toward yours. As well as in any case, thats what is so outstanding about modern democracy and the marketplace of ideas onthe internet.
What’s funniest about posts like this is that there are no posts (AFAIK) about real outdoor sports. Plenty of SWPLs take their hi-performance clothing into the outdoors, but you’d never know it from this site. Camping isn’t the same thing.
Бесплатная RPG онлайн игра Техномагия завоевала интерес тысяч пользователей различной возрастной категории оригинальным интерфейсом, геймплеем, игровым движком. Игра в стиле фэнтези совместила в себе элементы стратегии, тактики и логики. Мир Техномагии красочен и ярок, графика основана на флеш-анимации, при этом ее системные требования минимальны.
Oh man, I love my North Face and I am perpetually dressed like I’m ready for a hike- which I frequently do. Oh, yeah, I work for the National Park Service too, does that make me even whiter?
“Бесплатная RPG онлайн игра Техномагия завоевала интерес тысяч пользователей различной возрастной категории оригинальным интерфейсом, геймплеем, игровым движком. Игра в стиле фэнтези совместила в себе элементы стратегии, тактики и логики. Мир Техномагии красочен и ярок, графика основана на флеш-анимации, при этом ее системные требования минимальны.”
-Yeah, what he said.
Whiter than Pat Sajak, in my estimation.
Test.
Would anybody care to explain to me why my comments are being appended to the top of the list and not to the actual comment to which I’m replying? Or am I a colossal dumbass and there’s something pathetically obvious that I’m overlooking?
Love watching geeky (mostly white but not always) couples exploring a new city tooled up with all their peformance crap – Because it’s absolutely necessary to have 500 pockets, performance water bottle, goretec fabric etc. for plodding along a street.
First thing I thought of when I was looking at the ‘Stuff White People Like’ blog was “I wonder if The North Face is listed?” because I hate all the snobby white people that come in wearing their North Face jackets and smug looks like they are better than everyone else.
You know what I like watching? Unprepared non-white people.
Unprepared non-white people
If you need to acquire acquainted appreciably more on North cope with vests,Surfing North cope with Vest can be useful. There are numerous sorts of vests inside the marketplace and northfacecoupons are perceived as the best probabilities you can choose while buying very good mens vest.
I love your blog so much, and there are just some differences with others’. Hope there will be more wonderful things in your blog. Happy every day!
I dnt see how this has got anything to do with White people whatsoever. Nobody should be categorised and people wear what they wanna wear according to wear they live what they enjoy doing and what they do for a living.
I dnt see how this has got anything to do with White people whatsoever.
Yep. That’s not racist at all.
It’s not racist. Why can’t a white person talk about what white people like. Black people do it all the time. Good work, keep it up. And this is coming from someone who’s not even white. =)
yes that is not racest at all, heck i dont mind if you call me ‘cracker’ as it is a name used for somone that is a 3rd generation resident of a state.
Nice jackets for sure. Columbia has some really cool new stuff this season also.
Columbia is great for second-stringers. If you’re first rate, only the North Face will do.
*racist
A member? Color you suckered.
before all, it means stupid, slow brain working born-racist!
I wear some combinations of base layers (patagonia), R-1, and a hunting jacket at work most days so I think I can explain and debunk this “thing white people love”.
I wear this stuff because it’s comfortable. In fact, it’s comfortable enough to wear while sweating yourself silly while hauling a 70lbs pack uphill while mountaineering (which I do) so you can understand that it’s also preferable in more comfortable environments.
It’s not that a person wants to be prepared for outdoor activities 24/7, it’s that the quality and functionality beats normal clothes and you might as well make an investment. For me, I wear some combination of the aforementioned outdoor gear to work almost every day so it’s not so much signifying that I’m not at work as much as mere common sense to wear the same clothes on weekdays as I wear on weekends.
And no, you’re right. I don’t climb a mountain every weekend. But is it really so illogical to wear the same clothes anyways, or as you say, to buy something different (and less comfortable, and less functional) just because I don’t?
You are exactly what this honest observation targets, you must be a hardcore white you and your ” comfortable” and ” illogical” I feel already listening to you. It’s ok for white people to talk about othersbbut when a sensible critique about white peope- then its not Ok, I strive to wear stylish and not sloppy and I’m white
It’s fantastic that you are getting ideas from this paragraph as well as from our dialogue made at this time.
I love basic columbia fleece because they are just nice zipups with zip pockets, and also they are actually ribbed/have pull cords around wrist and waist. north face is stupid expensive if your just buying a fleece jacket. I’ve seen plenty of north faces show up at thrift stores though, but still don’t feel like buying because I don’t want anyone to think I was stupid enough to have bought it new.
I love fleece and the best is to use it when jerking off, very soft on my dickie, like your lips.
I am a woman of color from staten island new york. North Face was literally THE brand you had to wear in HS to be cool… all the White people had it as a standard…. and so to assimilate all the rest of us folks of color started buying northface too…now I just associate it with staten island garbage.
There was definitly a certain irony about reading that blog post yesterday, and my interest to bring it here. When I think of these non-geology types that dress this way I am forced to think of places like Boulder and Bozeman, for example.
You may have a good point on the images. I have often wondered why geology is such a pale dominated field (paleo to!). I will have to ponder more on this, I just realized I am super late for work!!………
Too funny. In Bozeman. With Jeep. And thule. No outdoor clothes today, but I would if it were the weekend!!
Hey guys, pretty sure you can find a wide array of similar Outdoor items that may interest you here:
http://outdoorshopping.com/index.php?route=common/home
Very good site, with lightning fast customer service.
Great! Similar to the REI’s out there today, but on a much more personal level.
Are you saying that only white people wear outdoor performance gear?
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These are {really|actually|in fact|truly|genuinely} {great|enormous|impressive|wonderful|fantastic} ideas in {regarding|concerning|about|on the topic of} blogging.
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{This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of} clever work and
{exposure|coverage|reporting}! Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated||added|included} you guys to {|my|our||my personal|my own} blogroll.|
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I’m {book-marking|bookmarking} and will be tweeting this to my followers! {Terrific|Wonderful|Great|Fantastic|Outstanding|Exceptional|Superb|Excellent} blog and {wonderful|terrific|brilliant|amazing|great|excellent|fantastic|outstanding|superb} {style and design|design and style|design}.|
{I love|I really like|I enjoy|I like|Everyone loves} what you guys {are|are usually|tend to be} up too. {This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of} clever work and {exposure|coverage|reporting}! Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated|added|included} you guys to {|my|our|my personal|my own} blogroll.
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would you mind {stating|sharing} which blog platform you’re {working with|using}? I’m {looking|planning|going} to start my
own blog {in the near future|soon} but I’m having a {tough|difficult|hard} time {making a decision|selecting|choosing|deciding} between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your {design and style|design|layout} seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for
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Can you {suggest|recommend} a good {internet hosting|web hosting|hosting} provider at a {honest|reasonable|fair} price?
{Thanks a lot|Kudos|Cheers|Thank you|Many thanks|Thanks},
I appreciate it!|
{I love|I really like|I like|Everyone loves} it {when people|when
individuals|when folks|whenever people} {come together|get together} and share {opinions|thoughts|views|ideas}.
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in {Ie|Internet explorer|Chrome|Firefox|Safari|Opera}.
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The {style and design|design and style|layout|design} look great though!
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My {coder|programmer|developer} is trying to {persuade|convince} me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the {expenses|costs}. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using {Movable-type|WordPress} on {a number of|a variety of|numerous|several|various} websites for about a year and am {nervous|anxious|worried|concerned} about switching to another platform. I have heard {fantastic|very good|excellent|great|good} things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can {transfer|import} all my wordpress {content|posts} into it? {Any kind of|Any} help would be {really|greatly} appreciated!|
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Coolmax, Merino Wool, Alpaca, Polartec, eVent, Neoshell, Goretex, PrimaLoft (insulator) etc. All of these fabrics make a difference and it just so happens that only certain companies make outerwear using these fabrics. TNF only uses Polartec as far as I have seen. Most of their stuff is just overpriced because of the brand name. Columbia, their stuff is durable but they use standard inexpensive materials. Fleece regardless if it is Polartec or not is a great insulator that breaths well. Go outside and wear a raincoat or other PU based rain/windproof material and come back inside after just an hour of exertion. Guaranteed you will be drenched in sweat.
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China’s per capita rice consumption for five consecutive years to reduce rice, the per capita agricultural information channels, China Agricultural Network Information, China Agricultural In the last five years, the Mainland of China, per capita rice consumption was reduced from 107.5 kg to 97.5 kg, with an average annual decrease of 2 kg, the annual decrease of 2.15. Experts believe that the world’s rice consumption demand reduced, so that the rice economy is facing challenges brought about by reduced demand, which will undoubtedly rice production in the industrialization process in China have an impact.According to Ito, Kyushu University, Japan,Ralph Lauren España, is a professor introduced since the last century since the 1960s, Japan’s per capita rice consumption fell from more than 120 kg over 60 kg, a drop of 1/2; the same period in Taiwan Province of China rice demand fell from more than 160 kg 50 kg, a drop of 2/3. Korea, India and other rice-consuming countries in recent years, the decline is equally clear.Rice production in China is the largest in the world, accounting for more than 30 percent of world production. According to the China Agricultural University, Professor Li Lite, due to increased production and consumption decline, each year 33 of the rice backlog. China’s current inventory of rice more than 8000 million tons, accounting for 66 of the global rice stocks. In a large backlog at the same time, the country each year but need to import large quantities of high quality rice, China imported 760,000 tons of rice in 2004, the number of China’s annual export of rice is only one tenth of Thailand. In 2006, China imported nearly 720,000 tons of quality rice. Thailand was set up in China’s Guangzhou sales office on the basis of the recent turn to set up sales office in Wuhan. Do not give up the exports of Asian countries at the same time, they again have targeted the Middle East and African countries, according to statistics, Thailand in 2006 to 7.4 million tons, the Middle East and African countries to export rice, exports accounted for 60 of the total export volume.In recent years, China’s rice consumption was reduced year by year trend, and this trend has become increasingly prominent in the global crop competition. The food culture of the entire Asian region, especially the world that the economic rise faster countries and regions, consumer attitudes are assimilated by the United States and Europe, and this is particularly evident among young people.Analyze the reasons for the reduction of demand for rice, experts from Asia’s economic development and people’s income levels increase. In recent years, China’s traditional industrial structure of agriculture is changing, strong development of animal husbandry, making China the world’s pork, chicken, eggs, the largest producer, at the
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