Over the course of a calendar year, white people have ample opportunities for themed parties and drinking: Halloween, St. Patrick’s Day, and Cinco De Mayo are the most popular officially sanctioned holidays. But that does not mean that white people shy away from creating their own impromptu themes for parties and evenings- mustache party! ’90s prom! Designing Women!
During the month of December, white people face an especially difficult challenge. This is the time of year when parties and drinking are most appropriate, but the most obvious theme of Christmas must be avoided. This is because Christmas forces Christianity upon others, and though their ancestors had no problem with this activity, modern white people are quite disgusted by the idea. Hanukkah parties are fun, but a bit too exclusive, and a Kwanzaa Party requires an enormous amount of physical, mental, and ironic labor that can only be done by the most elite of white people.
White people needed to find a party that was completely without religious affiliations, but still connected enough to the idea of Christmas that they could serve eggnog and hot toddies. The answer: ugly sweater parties.
These parties feature festive drinks, Christmas music by Sufjan Stevens, and most importantly, intentionally hideous sweaters. These ugly sweaters provide white people with an invisible shield that protects them from any criticism that might emerge if any Christianity accidentally slips into the evening.
“Hey man, I love that Burl Ives song, but um, you let Silent Night slip into the mix. That’s kind of awkward because, you know, the Crusades?”
White person points to sweater and makes a funny face.
Order is restored.
If you find yourself invited to one of these parties, you must begin your preparations immediately. Craftier white people have been searching used clothing stores since last Christmas, and so you should not expect to find anything of significant ironic value. Instead, your best hope is to see if any of your family members have an old sweater lying around.
“Hey man, nice sweater. It’s so ugly.”
“Yeah, when my family first got to this country we had to shop at Goodwill, this is the first one my father bought to get him through his first winter here. Good thing they didn’t have these parties back then, right? He would have died.”
“Geez, man, I’m sorry, you can cut in line for egg nog.”
Photo by paperladyinvites
Stuff White People Like 
FIRST!!!
lol
2nd
Ugly Sweater Parties are the best.
Who’s that fourth person in the picture? Maybe he’s providing them with black music that black people don’t listen to anymore.
A microbrewery in my area just hosted a Bill Cosby Ugly Sweater party.
Care to explain Designing Women? Am I missing something?
This is ridiculous. Only because some friends of mine – white friends, mind you – are having one of these parties on Friday in Philly. Sometimes, it’s like you’re spying on my crew, Lander…
I’m guessing it’s because it’s a quirky, ironic 80s show that people can latch onto, like the Golden Girls or something…
great, there goes my ugly sweater party this winter, though i have to admit i got the idea from an earlier post anyway.
well, most of the white people i know aren’t advanced enough to read this blog, so maybe i could still get away with it.
Ugly sweater parties? DOA.
12th! what the fuck are sweater parties?
This blog is gold. GOLD JERRY! GOLD!
I smell another subject post….
I love this one!! I’ve already been to two so far this year, I bought a hideous sweater for only $2.99 🙂 The Sufjan Stevens music also key – I love him! But he IS actually a Christian, as am I.. soo I don’t really identify with that part of the blog, but still I loved it nonetheless.
I don’t know what to say. I order to say something I first would have to understand what in the hell you’re talking about. So I’ll just POOP MY PANTS!
I thought this already made the list. I’ve been saying “white people love ugly christmas sweater parties” every time I hear about one. I must have had an original thought or something.
White people love being in on the joke that is themselves. Is there an entry about that? “Ha, I totally do go to ugly sweater parties. I recognize how white that makes me, and that totally makes it all right when I keep doing it”. I guess this falls under the larger umbrella of “irony”, which was totally covered. But still.
I knew it! I checked back at the sweater post and saw reference to ugly sweaters. SUDDENLY this year EVERY SINGLE white person is holding one of these. I was invited to SIX!!! and I’m admittedly somewhat embarrassed to have such cultural sheep in the realm of my “friends”.
There have never been so many of these parties until this year! In fact until this year I had never heard of such a thing as an ugly sweater party.
what’s interesting is how this site is now the definitive place that “original” white people look for “original” and “unique” ideas. Following which, all white people will progress to copying each other’s “original” ideas. Stop being so boring please!
clander, what happened to #117?
pauly these parties happen every year, and clander they are not a way of having a secular christmas party. they ARE christmas parties that put to use clothing people have that they had to wear when their parents dressed them and bought them ugly sweaters.
normally, your posts are funny, but this is one is weakend by the fact that your logic is off. not everything is done out of white guilt.
Boy, I loathe white people.
Lasersanchez….
“White people love being in on the joke that is themselves. Is there an entry about that? “Ha, I totally do go to ugly sweater parties. I recognize how white that makes me, and that totally makes it all right when I keep doing it”.
Really really really well said! brilliant!!! “I am SOOOO WHITE.” (I have always thought that this blog should eventually have “Reading Stuff White People Like” as one of the entries because there’s nothing white people like more than being able to laugh at themselves and continue to think they’re individual).”
With that being said
I think this is the first swpl I’ve read that misses the mark. The subject of the ugly sweater party is IDEAL, needed to be on the list, but the connections and logic weren’t all there. People don’t have these parties because of any Christian guilt reasons or lack of ancestral ties, it just makes them feel unique, spontaneous, random, and possessing an interesting and offbeat sense of humor.
Neither funny nor true, for the most part. White people love wearing ugly sweaters to parties – especially Christmas parties but why the f$%k would anyone have an ugly sweater party? The writers need to start getting out in the world and canvassing white people who live somewhere other than San Francisco, New York, or California.
The 23rd of this month my employer is having an “ugly sweater” work party. I work in Orem, Utah.
Here’s the difference between the cities you mentioned and wherever you live: we actually REALIZE that ugly sweaters should never be worn to anything BUT an ugly sweater party.
pauly, these parties have been happening for at least the past decade… pretty much as soon as there was a safe enough buffer between the 80’s and the present that people’s feelings wouldn’t be hurt when their “favorite old sweater” was voted the “best ugly sweater of the party.”
if you can think of a better idea for a silly (and easy to put together) Christmas party, please, enlighten us.
I hope “ugly sweater parties” catch on down here. Alabama students need something to fill the void now that they can’t have blackface ones(http://www.themilitant.com/2001/6546/654654.html) anymore.
Ugly Sweater Parties are SO 2004. They aren’t ironic or funny anymore.
You understand that this is satire, right?
I never heard of “Ugly Sweater Parties”, but I live in Germany. Well, we probably also have all kind of silly parties, but this one would be new :-).
What are you talking about? I just went to one this past weekend… there’s your funny and irony.
Haha, I love when people unwitingly prove one of the main points of this blog. Do you realize there are countless “crews” just like yours, who all think they are the funniest?
Well you’ve got to get some wear out of last years’ Christmas present from your mother somehow. And I’d guess a drink in your hand makes it feel slightly less embarrassing.
I’m a pretty white person and have never heard about an ugly sweater party. But it sure sounds awesome!
Yes…but THIS one is. Note the smug satisfaction on the faces of those in the picture of having a genuine bkack man in their midst. And not the watered down Obama type black either. That guy is Africa-black.
who live somewhere other than San Francisco, New York, or California.
Um, San Francisco is in California. That’s like saying that someone is foreign because they live in France…or Europe.
You’re not pretty at all.
Ummm….My husband and I went to one of these Saturday night….we had fun looking for sweaters. The guys were all a class in Explosive Ordnance Disposal for the military, so it was great seeing all the tough Navy Divers going goofy like this. Another thing Stuff White People Like has on me!!!
Yeah, and there’s always Macy’s. Plenty of good sweater material there.
Angie (from over at http://www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Odd though that a large percentage of Sufjan is based on Christian themes. I guess I like Jesus, and ugly sweaters—what a great time of year!
wow so not funny
u suck
In Germany you have parties where you wear stupid looking winter coats.
This blog is sooo boring so I guess I will do the next best thing, find the first buttwhip who has something not so loving to say for no apparent reason and politly let them know it. Well guess who I find, you dud, so far, good assholes are hard to find here so i will just pick with you till i find someone more worthy. Put a lil love in your heart 🙂
You’re an idiot. That was hilarious! I hate white people.
Anyone else feel these are overplayed and on the way out? The mustache party is way more hip.
Did anyone notice the african american guy in the picture? See? EVERYONE loves ugly-christmas-sweater parties!!!!! :))))))
Hey KC, as much as I would like to simpathize your lose of the use of blackface parties, I have a suggestion for experiencing the true black experience. Put on your black face and go to a majority black area and see what it feels like. I highly recommend that idea too all white people who agree with KC about blackface parties. LOL.
put alil love in your hearts:)
He’s a ‘buttwhip’? An unworthy ‘asshole’? And you suggest that he needs a little love in his heart?
Do you not even understand the content of your own comment?
I’m pretty sure Pete H’s crew is special and Lander is writing just about them. We are all lucky for having stumbled upon this blog dedicated to their unique and fascinating lifestyles.
Wow, this is REALLY weak.
It seems like you spent 30 seconds thinking through this blog entry…
Boring.
#119 Telling Landers That He Missed The Mark
It’s funny how we can always find a handful of people who complained about one unique detail in each of Lander’s posts that do not describe their specific lifestyle.
Both of you should try using spell check.
So white people should be punished because they have such sagacious fashion taste that they can lampoon themselves with irony? The liberal intelligentsia would have you believe that whites should be embarrassed by their attempt at humorous, ironic self-flagellation, but this just another concomitant of the rise of cultural Marxism.
LIBERAL INTELLIGENTSIA LIBERAL INTELLIGENTSIA LIBERAL INTELLIGENTSIA CULTURAL MARXISM CULTURAL MARXISM CULTURAL MARXISM LATENT RACISM LATENT RACISM
/james
As a 300 pound Italian…everyday is Sweater Day for me…especially when I am sporting the speedo
wot?
Wierd post |
Bonus white points for screaming “Its a Cosby sweater! A Cosby sweater!” repeatedly.
this would actually classify as irony
http://
farm4.static.flickr.com/3210/2938542119_3bd710213e.jpg?v=0
“Hanukkah parties are fun, but a bit too exclusive…”
Why include Hanukkah here? JEWS ARE NOT WHITE EITHER GENETICALLY OR CULTURALLY.
He’s too black to be African American.
Oh, crap. We’re having an ugly sweater party at work RIGHT NOW.
And I am wearing an ugly sweater.
My skin may not be as pale as alabaster, but for this day, I know that I am White.
I knew sooner or later, some dumbass will be willing to amuse me with their inability to mind their own business. Hi Fark, you feel better about yourself dumbass, I understand exactly what i said because I was sitting here when I wrote it. I guess you decided to prove me wrong and show me that there truly are some assholes on this blog. Well FART, I stand behind every word I wrote as i will stand behind these words, GO F*&k yourself. Do you understand the content of THAT comment. Mind your business and put alil love in your heart Fart 🙂
Buckaroo, maybe you should try using ‘MIND YOUR DAMN BUSINESS’, its a strange concept Im sure, but Im pretty sure your lil pea brain can handle it. Now scroll on lil boy and stay out of grown folks business, oh yeah, put alil love in your heart 🙂
Haha, just went to one this weekend!
I tried to find one at a thrift store/goodwill, but couldn’t find any, so I had to make one myself…!
Hope they never go out of style – gotta have SOME reason to keep the sweaters my grandma gives me every year….!
Your observations are mind bottling, mr. lander (and yes, quoting Will Ferrell is definitely a white thing). my nickname is “white”, I live in Seattle, and the ugly sweater party I went to on Saturday included Gag Gifts (see: vintage) for the best of the ugliest sweaters, discussions of the Market, divorce, and my friend’s new Prius…..the whitest christmas party ever. I was made for that shit.
You’re a dork.
That pretty much sums it up for me.
How conflicting. Sujan Stevens’ Christmas music is Christian.
HA!
“Mind your own business” has no merit on a popular blog.
That’s like a stripper telling a customer “Stop staring at my ass!” 🙂
Good point
haha to get out as much religion as possible, very true now.
Unfortunately, Sufjan’s music is so hard to understand that it doesn’t really matter if he’s Christian or not.
I just know someone is going to come on here and talk about how ugly sweater parties enslaved black people and killed off Native Americans.
I agree! there has been a flurry of these parties this year -much more than any other year amongst the mid 20s white people crowd. Much more of them than any other year (i reckon at least a 1000% increase over the last few years). And the source of them is likely this blog. This may have been something advanced white people did in the past but it has now been so popularized that it won’t be considered ironic enough.
Holding one of these parties this year is about as original as dressing as the joker or sarah palin for halloween
Hey b.w.y, you really put me in my place with those strong words. ‘Im a dork’, please forgive me, and while your at it, go F*&k yourself sideways. Hmmm, I think that about sums it up for me too. Mind your business and put alil love in your heart 🙂
no, but they ARE the cause of autism in Asians
Wjs, you make a valid point, this is a popular blog, open to the public for all the world to see, so let me anounce that not only can you mind your own business nosey ass, but you can Kiss my happy go lucky ass from here to infinity. Now go tell that to your stripper, save up your money because thats the only peace of female behind you will ever see and go F— yourself too. Now put alil love in your heart
🙂
Hey, it’s no joke. ugly sweater parties were first used to enslave Africans in the 1700’s. they were dragged out of their tribes and put on big ugly boats, the sweaters were used to keep them complacent and identifiable as they were so ugly. You can see in the picture how the white people have enslaved that black guy in that sweater. THE WHITE MAN also put diseases on these sweaters and gave them to the Indians, thus wiping them all out with special Christmas tree unicorn sweaters. LETS NOT FORGET ABOUT THE NAZIS. the Nazis made special ugly sweaters with the star of David on it to be able to identify all Jews. People like Napoleon Dynamite and other youtube people like to wear ugly sweaters ironically, but these sweaters are no JOKE. Every time you go into goodwill or a thrift store and look at those sweaters with your ironic hipster friends, REMEMBER that that the next time you see a green sequined sweater with a panda bear and a snowman think of all the terrible things that happened to minorities in them. One day i hope all people will be free of the stigmatization of ugly sweaters and we can all wear American Apparel clothes and pea coats. ONE DAY!
like i said, the Nazis FORCED ugly sweaters on the Jews, therefore ugly sweater parties are the ONLY way to make up for it.
My turn! My turn!…I need alil love in my heart!
Tell me to go F- myself
he must be one of those cool Nigerians or one of those war-torn refugees from Somalia that every white person wishes were their friend.
This is hilarious! I live in a VERY “white” city whose citizens perfectly fit the descriptions in this blog. Since the beginning of december I haven’t gone a single day without seeing a group of people dressed up in ugly christmas sweaters. My roommates and I had the idea for an ugly christmas sweater party back in november and we thought we were soooo creative and hilarious. We are white.
-a fan from Madison, WI
Thanks for tricking liberals into reading about all of the things that makes conservatives hate them, clander.
Continue your work, my son.
Why talk to a stripper, or worry about women when you’re right here enigma? I know you want me to kiss your cute ass dude. 🙂
LOL, ok, there is enough to go around. You too can go F@*k yourself and put alil love in your heart. 🙂
ha!
Really, though, the only reason white people think these sweaters are funny is that they are mostly worn by the wrong kind of old white women.
Come to think of it, I just got into an argument with another white woman about the inherent classism of the ugly-sweater party.
Maybe that actually makes me whiter than she is.
Thanks for the compliment you HOMO, I bet you would try to kiss it. HA, sorry dude, i dont play with boys. I am attracted to women. I bet you dont worry about women since you keep focusing on male booties, as flattering as it may be, i will definitely decline your inappropriate proposition. I apologize to all the gay and lesbians on this blog site, I hope I didnt offend you by forcing opon your group this dumb ass, obviously he isnt straight since he is fantacising about kissing my butt. Anywhoo, wjs, you need jesus and you also need to put alil love in your heart
🙂
oh yeah…. go f…, you already know the rest.
I was JUST at one of these. GOD I’m good at being white.
Maybe when you are in your 40s you wear an ugly sweater to a non ugly sweater Christmas party (and cause all of the 18-25 year olds at the party to notice you and say “Bro check them out I wish I had a sweater like that for my Ugly Sweater Party tomorrow night.”) But this weekend and the next there will be at least 20 of these parties on every college campus across the nation, so Kelti maybe you should try not being so damn old, or make something of yourself and go to college.
Thank you…and a merry f’ing Christmas to you!
It did already kind of the make the list at #103: Sweaters. It covered more than Ugly Sweater Parties, but a good portion of it was devoted to that.
The “ugly sweater” party concept is so old that mold is growing on it. Of course, every generation thinks that they invented the wheel, and this is a perfect example of that.
And a happy F@*king New Year to you 🙂
Now lets go spread the word to all.
I’m not actually trying to fight with you (that whole ‘smartest person on the short bus thing’).
The super-clever “go F- yourself.” That’s fine, whatever.
And the passive aggressive attempt to rile people up and start a fight over nothing. OK, sure I get it.
And telling people to ‘mind their own business on a public blog, when YOU were the one who started picking on people. OK, you have issues.
BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP SAYING ‘ALIL’!
But you asked me to f— myself while I kiss your ass enigma?
How do you know I’m not a woman, enigma? And, if you thought I was a guy, why would you ask guys to f— themselves while they kiss your ass then say “Nope, I like women” ?
*Grabs shotgun, puts in Goo Goo Dolls Give a Little Bit 8track*
Let’s do it!
is this an american thing? i have never heard of ugly sweater parties, and i thought i knew white people pretty well, being asian and all. but your post doesn’t have tips on how to get invited to one (do you have to be white? the black person in the photo gives me hope), and how to make friends with all the white ppl in the room, cuz i need more white friends in my life. or are canadians the wrong kind of white people? nah, can’t be!!! (and not cuz clander is one too!)
I thinks it’s hilarious that you would tell someone to kiss your ass while simultaneously telling that person to “put alil love in your hear”. Nice use of irony. You must be white.
These comments are boring.
I don’t know Ezra, have you ever met a Jew who grew up on the Upper East Side? They are practically indistinguishable.
Bill Cosby would be proud.
Oh yea, please help my friends and I resolve one of our many arguements at:
http://thetossup.wordpress.com/
I’d really appreciate it.
Nope, I just went to a “Festive Sweater Party” on Saturday in Toronto. And, I think that Canadians tend to be exactly the right kind of white people – self-destructively obsessed with political correctness.
Brilliant
As a proud Australian, we have our own ugly sweater (jumper) variety which all white people like to find in an opp shop – the Coogi. Also located at any airport – although it isn’t ironic to buy it new.
Given the penchant for 80ies clothing, young white art students can be found wearing them (the 2nd hand variety complete with pilling) over skinny jeans at a laneway bar near you.
The ugly sweater thing is great. I can’t even count how many times this has been the theme when friends and I get together for our winter season parties.
Ugly Sweater Parties have already been covered under Sweaters (103).
NEW IDEAS, PLZ.
You have ALIL problem with that term buddy, last time I checked no one invited you to this party. You decided to insert your two cents into ALIL statement that i made to someone else. And to be truthful, I wasnt even insulting to that person. I made a simple observation and dropped it. I even said that theyre not worthy to be called an asshole and……., HELL, you can read, go back and look for yourself. The only insult was a play on theyre name. You on the other hand, the LIL asshole that you are, thought you could just say your LIL remark and get away with it. Therefore, you wanted my attention, now you got it asswhip. Now, stay out of grown folks business and put ALIL love in your heart bitch. 🙂
Hey hmh, Im an enigma, figure it out. As for the gift of telling to people to go F*@k themselves and simutaniously telling them to put alil love in their hearts, thats just a gift. 🙂
Hmmm, wjs, my mind wobbles. I never looked at it that way. How about this. If you are a woman, you can still kiss my ass and continue to f*@k yourself, but just let me watch while you do it. If your a dude, you have my permission to continue the previously stated activies but i will not be interested in watching and i will be sure to fart in your face to show my appreciation. In my book, assholes have no gender lines, racial lines or economic lines. An asshole is an asshole. You are an asshole, therefore male, female or otherwise, you can still kiss my ass and ……, you know the rest. You are willing do all the other activities mentioned but you dont want to put alil love in your heart,
that makes me a sad enigma:(
i will once again state that you need to put alil love in your heart 🙂
You are a sick puppy, how about rage against the machine.
I live in a black neighborhood. But, for some reason, the brothers always try to speak to me in Spanish.
*obscure lyrical reference to alil love in your heart fail*
I can rally around the family, with a pocketful of shells.
Swing by my site for sick bastards if you like
Wait and see what happens. In due time, it will reveal itself to you.
Ughhh! hideous. Wouldn’t be caught dead at an ugly sweater party. echchhh…shudder…
PROM PARTIES!!!!
I’m so white it hurts sometimes.
Your mind wobbles, your words, know thyself. Your sexual preference wobble quiet a bit, also. Merry Christmas to you: Have you thought of asking Santa for a brain, dumbass.
One word………DORK!
Don’t worry, that person never makes sense.
Its just another Halloween party, but everyone decides to wear the same exact costume. White people are so creative.
Hall Monitor
http://DetentionSlip.org
Actually quite the opposite. That shit is so earnest it makes me wanna puke. Almost as much as you irony-pussies do.
Buttfuckaroo, I got your dork. You dont know when to quit do you, apparently not. I would strongely urge you to go the hell on before i put you in your place somemore. Give your nosey ass alil blast from the past. LOL, (you know what im talkin about when I embarrassed your nosey ass in earlier blogs) Now stay in a childs place and beat it BOY. If I want your opinion, I will give it too you. Now put alil love in your heart. 🙂
Until now, I’ve never heard of such a party but it sounds like a rocking good time. I will probably host of these over the christmas holidays. Who knew hideous sweater+alcohol=fun!
Hey dumbfuckaroo, you dont know when to quit while your ahead now do you, I like the term ‘my mind wobbles’, its rather catchy, especially when it reels in dumbass bloggers like you who just cant resist to try and get in a cute but useless jab at me. My sexual preference is not at all wobbly, its straight as an arrow. My tolorance for stupidity is another story. Thats why I am about to lay your dumb ass out. You nosey, fake ass intellicual who couldnt think your way out of a card board box with the top still open. Is it me, or has everybody on this site stuck foot up your simple ass already, you truly are a glutton for punishment. Now you just had to keep buzzing around me, you wanted my attention bitch, now you got it. Do you have anything productive to say or do you just get off on trying to be humorous. Funny your not, comedian you aint, dumb ass you truly are. I will break it down for you, you will never win a debate, you well never get the girl/guy, pet pig, whatever. your not a tough guy in the real world, your not tough on the computer either, just shut up like the bitch that you are and stay in your place. Dont make me post your blogging hall of shame bitch. Now put alil love in your heart. 🙂
Major WTF mate.
White boy can’t sweater.
Visit: So You Want To Be a Banquet Manager
Wouldn’t it be more like: other than Paris… or the Île-de-France region?
Oh yeah, this is how we do it in Echo Park:
http://www.laweekly.com/slideshow/view/205157
#119 “Watching the Sunday News”
here’s the 128th comment.
It really doesn’t have anything to do with this post.
Its just that being a computer geek, I luuuuuuuurrve 128 = (2^7)
Interesting. I took this photo of my husband and three of his good friends at our Ugly Sweater party this year, and its funny to see where all the responses have lead.
I don’t think I’ll clear anything up, just to see where the comments continue to go!
This party was like our Halloween Part II. We had so much fun!
Goodnight all!
-chelsey
My latest blog describes this very event.
The sweater is nice, but i think it is kids only lol!
My latest blog describes this very event.
Oh enigma! You are cute when your angry. That ass is mine! My mind wobbles just thinking about it. You beat me so badly, enigma! Try harder. Do it some more. 🙂
All my Christmas sweaters are beauuuuuutiful ^_^
Esh, I do not like these parties. They are getting a bit trite.
Ugly enough….
Definitely.
*high fives*
Come on clander lets have an entry on Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds and The Fall, two of the most right kind of white person bands in the history of music.
So, I read this but had never heard of the concept…
Until last night my coworker (we work at Starbucks, natch) comes in to say hi wearing an old green sweater. She announces that she’s going to a craft making/ugly sweater party. I knew she was super white but this blew my mind. She doesn’t read the site but I think she will after I mentioned this latest post.
I have never heard or been invited to these things but have always feared they might exist. Why would anyone want to go out wearing an ugly sweater?!?!?
“a Kwanzaa Party requires an enormous amount of physical, mental, and ironic labor that can only be done by the most elite of white people.”
How true.
See, racism is funny…Didn’t white people come up with “blogs”, though?
Kenyan Cowboy Shirts as advertised on the ultimate white person’s blog boingboing.
Satisfying your vintage wants, worldly-international needs, and of course helping poor Kenyans out by employing them to make “hand crafted” “real” clothing:
http://www.kilakituclothing.com/index.php
hey Wjs, i knew you liked it ruff, 🙂 Im feeling warm and snuggy today so I will play nice. I apologize for not giving it to you the way you like it, maybe next time. Put alil love in your heart. 🙂
One of the funniest in a long time. Nice. The sample convo at the end made me pee a little.
We like REAL Christmas trees.
Yer funny!
hahahahahahahahahahahaha okay this is officially the funniest thing ive ever read. i love this blog in general, but this post is especially awesome! its true that were not allowed to mention christmas either, which is just the dumbest thing ever. if you dont celebrate christmas on a religious level, you can still come to the party, and if you refuse, WHATEVER youre not the kind of person who should have made teh party fun anywayyyyy.
Jews aren’t white? Then why was Judah P. Benjamin a prominent cabinet member of the Confederate States of America?
Lemme guess… you like either jazz or hip-hop and thus think you’re totally down with black people as a result.
WHITE PEOPLE ARE EURO-WINE-SOCCER-LIBERAL-GLOBALIST LOVING GAYS AND SISSIES!
AMERICA IS SO MANLY BIG MUSCLES TOUGH BIG HITS MACHO BIG BALLS YEAH BIG TOUGH YEAH FOOTBALL IS SO BIG YEAH BIG MUSCLE.
Dear Friends and Associates:
Please accept, with no obligation implied, implicit, expressed, or intended, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all . . . . . and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2009 but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great, (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only “AMERICA” in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting this greeting, you are accepting all terms intended, whether stated herein or not. Acceptee hereby agrees to indemnify Wisher other against any damages or lawsuits that may arise from someone actually experiencing merriment of any kind, whether intended, or by an Act of God. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal and is void where prohibited by law.
this brothas deep.
Um, they have ugly sweater parties in the South as well. Maybe you just aren’t white enough to be invited to one!
funny enough…we are throwing an ugly Christmas sweater party in six days…and we love grammar
And a Merry Christmas to you!
I actually have never knew of these types of parties until last weekend a friend of mine said he was going to one it was a bad sweater and cookie party. He is indeed white –
um…black people love Cinco de Mayo…
Oh god, I had an Ugly Sweater Party last year…its exactly like you explained it lmao. I feel like your a spy, im on the Truman Show, I just know it. Everything I do ends up on this blog….damn you…and I was indeed searching for months at thrift stores for the perfect sweater knowing full well I was going to throw a bad sweater party.
exactly…Plus its full of white people with the one ironically placed black guy…perfect whiteness..
well there have been halloween christmas partys….and dressing up like famous characters in santa costume parties…
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
the next post should be about white guys denying their gay even though they have dreamed about having a gay experience, or have had a ga experience…
jewish people arent exclusive, only when it comes to scholarships…
enigmama,
You’ve got it, dumb ass, I’m trying to be funny and torment you. You’re like kicking a bull in the balls and he goes of butting every god damn thing he sees. I should add that during his rampage he huffs and puffs, and, don’t forget, there is a lot of bullshit. Sounds just like you, dumb ass. Oh, yeah, anyone who has to brag about their sexual preference knows he is weak in the sexual department regardless of his preference.
One more thing, if you are real as you portray yourself on this blog you are one sorry sack of shit. If it’s an act you could use some acting lessons. You’re just not believable, dumb ass.
I have been meaning to ask you. Are you that fat little dorky guy who sat in the back of math class playing with yourself? You say some of the same shit he did.
Now I must live in fear of your great wrath. Oh my, what should I do? Maybe it’s just an enigma or, better yet, a dumb ass.
Dumb ass,
One thing you cannot do is embarrass me. What an ego you have. That ego is the very thing that I poke at, and you make a fool out of yourself every time I do. You’re a puppet on a string. The puppet’s name is enigmama dumb ass.
You must be a friend of enigmama.
What the hell! There is no such thing as an act of god.
It took you two days to think of that……, yes you really put me in my place. Let me apologize for ever thinking that I could beat you. Just because everybody else on this site has put foot up your ass doesnt mean I could, I am soo shame. You feel better bitch, that what you want to hear? I was being sarcastic when I said that, I have to inform you that because you dont have the mental ability to figure it out by yourself. I have better things to do like rearranging my sock drawer than to bother wasting my time with LIL Brats. If you want to play with the big boy PUNK, grow some balls. Now get the hell out and put alil love in your heart 🙂
P.S
Im not the only one making you look like an ass on this site and its not me looking bad, its just you. Hahaha, whos the dumb ass now bitch.
Hey dumbfuckaroo, did that short fat kid in the back of math class beat you up and take your lunch money in school, then after you flunk out of school, he became your boss. I now understand your pain. Your day dreaming about bull balls and gay love, you need Jesus. I must be real to you because I have not said Im real on any of my blogs, thats just how you felt after reading them. That I am the real deal and that you are an imposter. A computer tough guy, problem is, you keep getting beat up by everybody. I seriously doubt that you are trying to provoke me because you first have to have the intelligence to do so. You are dumb as a brick therefore i have nothing to worry about. To further my point, every battle you engage in with anybody, you lose and losers never laugh, they get laughed at. Save your ‘save face’ propaganda for someone who will fall for it. Get a life loser, and by the way, you drew first blood with me. I was minding my bizness when your dumb ass decide to play wiseguy and bit off more than you could chew. You have no diginity left, just quit before I stop being nice. Put alil love in your heart 🙂
I’m always impressed by the amazing accuracy of this blog. Seriously, I have the Sufjan Stevens Christmas album on right now.
No sonaroo, I have no affiliation with R.M.A, I must have really touched a nerve with you RooRoo. haha, put alil love in your heart. 🙂
Christmas time we all get nice and ugly ones.
http://www.culturallycool.com
yeah, my funny bone
I have been waiting for the day that you put out an original thought above the elementary school level. That’s only two criteria you need to conform to. Do you think you can pull it off.
Oh, and the use of “haha”, boy are you cool. Is “hehe” next?
I’m somewhat interested in what the hell you are referring to when you use “alil”. It’s not in my vocabulary, but of course I’m not a ghetto or trailer park dweller as you must be.
Keep that ego up front big boy.
Pinch a pig and he goes, wee.
You’ll need and explanation. It’s a familiar midwest rural saying referring to the fact if you keep doing the same thing you will get the same results.
You’re right in there with that pig, dumb ass.
Hilarious.
English, please.
Anything to keep the lil punk happy, for those who are to stupid to figure it out, alil is a compressed version of the phrase “a little”, get the connection, “alil, a little”. Do I have make it even more clear for you, now write that ten times til you make the connection. (til is the short version of until, incase you didnt figure that out). My normal ego is doing fine, its just my intolorance for stupid people that is on a hair trigger. Anywhoo, i figure i will elevate my diabolical laugh to the next level and say whucka whucka whucka, put alil love in your heart sucka. 🙂
Hey buttaronie, pinch a pig and he goes wee huh, I bet you do more to the pig than just pinch him to make it go wee. You are correct about doing the same thing and getting the same results, you keep messing with the big boys and you get smacked back down to size. whucka whucka whucka. Put alil love in your heart pig lover 🙂
You have a weird lil fasination with farm animals buttaroo, bull balls and tickling pigs. Are you into beastiality or worse?
Put a psychiatrist into your life, work on the love later. 🙂
Ok, well juggle some more bull balls and continue to tickle pigs and your not so funny bone will fell alot better you beastiphile. Put a psychiatrist in your life, worry about the love later. 🙂
ps, you need Jesus, Buttaroo.
Damn this is some funny shit…its putting alil love in my heart
You just keep going on & on , and patting yourself on the ass for a well done enigma! 🙂
If you used the word ‘classism’ you’re definitely whiter…
Madison is white? Really?
Maybe we can have a rally to commemorate all the oppressed and designate the date forever after as “Ugly Sweater Awareness Day.”
Maybe because Sufjan is Christian…but perhaps he’s indie enough that White People are willing to overlook that glaring defect.
boobs
Is this the Obama Administration christmas card?
I wanted a sweater for Christmas but got a screamer instead! Better than a moaner I guess.
Hahaha, good stuff!
I love sweaters the more the better.
How many times where you somewhere and got chilly and somebody gave you one and it made the world of difference to you? It didn’t matter what it looked like it made you warm right?
http://www.culturallycool.com
Happy Holidays to all
http://www.culturallycool.com
hi wjs, is that your way of telling me job well done, I know that it is. You feeling left out, you need for me to share some special time with you too. Im in the middle of something at the moment so I will have to tend to you later, my sock drawer is in need of rearranging. Put alil love in your heart. 🙂
Nice Ugly sweater picture… I thought this site was about White People and there’s a black guy at the party!?
This is my absolute fave blog and I found it by accident. Can’t wait to by the book. Side note: My friends and I arehaving an ugly sweater party and we’re all black… 🙂
As a non-white person with lots of white friends, the last comment about wearing dad’s (ugly) sweater after he got off the boat is a mistake.
White people will want to know how your family got here, where you’re from, if you still speak the language and, quite possibly, if you could say something in that language.
Never give them this chance. You’ll be having the same conversation you’ve had 1,000 times before.
White people are effeminate euro-loving soccer-admiring wine-sipping late-drinking sissie nancies!
Real men are American, red blooded American, who drink beer not sissy wine, watch football BIG BALLS BIG HITS YEAH not pansy ass eurosoccer, work as a crane operator at a benchpress factory instead of the huffington post style-section editor.
REAL MEN HATE FOREIGNERS,SOCCER,SOCIALISM,WINE,CHEESE. BIG HITS YEAH!
If you tell a white person that their ugly sweater is Cosby-esque, they will tell that story for a minimum of 10 years.
In 2003 my friends and I (should I say “white friends?”) threw a party we called The Festival of Sweaters. Never would have thought it would be something embraced by white people across the country. How far back can other people trace their involvement in holiday sweater parties? I’d love to hear from others.
Thanks, dumb ass, I should have known some illiterate elementary school drop out would be making up his own words. That ego sure can cause a boy to look awful imbecilic. By the way, what is with all the love in your heart. Did you just have visions of the divine or a bad baggie of shrooms? And, if I don’t get around to it in the next couple days, have a Happy Holiday Season, dumb ass.
dumb ass,
I’ve got Jesus, big boy and alil love. Fuck, I’m ready.
Your fascination with bestiality concerns me, and, also explains a lot about you.
“Good thing they didn’t have these parties back then, right? He would have died.”
HaHaHa! My pops has these sweaters. Oh, and I saw a new trend beginning, too. My white friends had an ugly XMas Sweater “Happy Hour.” Man, they are crafty–only because I personally know the people who went to the “Happy Hour,” and knew that they all had attended Ugly Sweater Parties the week before! Ha.
We have to wear them because our mom bought them for us!
Seasons greetings to you too buttawhippo, we educated people have the mental capability to do that. Dont get mad because you dont have the ability to speak jargon as well as the kings language. I can do both very well thank you, you can say i can hold my ground amongst kings and peasents alike. I came up with the put alil love in ones heart by reading all the mean, racist and ignorant post that alot of people post up here. I figure if you can post stupidity, you going to have to defend it. When you say something stupid like you always manage too do, if the mood hits me, I call you out on it and slap it in your face every chance i get. Watch what you say and you wont have to deal with me. I will leave you alone. Say something DUMB, and you will have to deal with me. Im the caped crusader. LOL. Well nemisis, seasons greetings to you too. I will stick foot up your ass later. HO HO HO muthafu@*a. 🙂
I think that our parties go back as far as 2000. They are a blast.
I am glad I saw this article.
I am actaully going to an ugly sweater party on the 19th.
They need him around as an example of an intelligent, well-to-do African American when the opportunity arises to be offended.
The REALLY crafty Ugly Sweater Party-goers take a very old normal sweater and make it ugly by means of attaching something to it.
Like Solo Red Party Cups, or a bunch of cotton balls to make a snowman.
I didnt bring up animals genious, you did. Remember how you broke down what happens when you mess with bull balls or when you pinched a pigs ass. You remember how hot you got when you heard it go weeee. Those are your memories, not mine. That explains alot about you. put alil love in your heart 🙂
hohoho muthaf*$a
Hi Jake please see the following:
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/21/14-having-black-friends/
Therefore it falls into the category and the circle of life is complete. They are really white!
Referring to people as your “white friends” is racist. When people of color say to me “Hey white boy” or “Whats up white boy” “That white boy think he could dance”. I don’t miss a beat, I hit em with a cracka high-five and say “Black kid!!! whats good?” or “Yoo, My main black boy! How you living?”.If these arent appropriate responses then you should check your endless supply of “white boy” and “white people” at the door of our fucking ugly sweater party.
YA! An equally racially-insensitive comment to shoot back at your white haterz! As our society and culture evolve, soon every white person will be able to refer to the word “white” as racist, and we can finally be vindicated for this persecution we’ve endured for so long! Thank you, Nick! And yes, check your “white boy” and “white people” at the door of OUR fucking ugly sweater party! We ignore racial stereotypes!
Would showing up to one of these parties dressed as Richard the Lionhearted make you extremely ironic or the wrong kind of white people?
This is just aweseome. I thought the sweater party theme was local anamoly…I guess it’s gone nationwide! I must admit that I just bought a sweater in thrift store for one of these parties…it’s a hideous wool disaster wtih a reindeer on it. I am SO white!
Wow, and i JUST got my ‘EVITE’ to a ugly sweater party this weekend!
Thanks SWPL!!
I’m glad someone realised this blog isn’t called “Stuff ONLY White People Like”.
ANYONE can pretentiously enjoy irony 😉
White people are effeminate euro-loving soccer-admiring wine-sipping late-drinking sissie nancies!
Real men are American, red blooded American, who drink beer not sissy wine, watch football BIG BALLS BIG HITS YEAH not pansy ass eurosoccer, work as a crane operator at a benchpress factory instead of the huffington post style-section editor.
REAL MEN HATE FOREIGNERS,SOCCER,SOCIALISM,WINE,CHEESE. BIG HITS YEAH!
Sufjan Stevens is the shit, i was listening to his christmas music during dish washing time today, just fabulous, just fabulous.
i never even knew ugly sweater parties existed.
You’re the wrong kind of white person.
That’s the wrong kind of white person. don’t you get it?
Ever heard of creacionism? I like it.
My office is having one of these today but they just announced it yesterday! Not NEARLY enough time to hit Savers!
Ugly sweater parties are one thing, but the true, ironic, drink-til-we-fall-down, white-person answer to Christmas is obviously Festivus.
Okay, I don’t get this post. Do white people REALLY host such parties?
If so, why haven’t I heard about it before?
Stuff White People Like #119: Pathetic self-deprecation
Nah, in general people are terrified to ask “where you’re from” in case it turns out you’re second-generation and you kick up a big hissy fit about being “from America!!!”.
I find this site funnier and funnier not only for the funny posts but all the funny white people who don’t get what a stereotype is, don’t have a sense of humor, and get offended easily and seem to have to explain that THEY are actually different, not the kind of white that this website talks about. lighten up… this shit is funny… stop explaining yourselves cause that just makes you whiter!
Great! Can Don Imus have his job back now?
You forgot to add to your hate list boys like you.
Hail brother! If we can recruit a third person we can begin the counter-cultural revolution in earnest…..
I’m still worried. Probably more for my horse than myself.
“because Christmas forces Christianity upon others, and though their ancestors had no problem with this activity…”
Like dog shit icing on a Black Forest Gateau Lander surfs his relentless racism in on a faux naif wave of, nudges, winks and fake self deprecation.
The facts are that Christmas is a pagan European festival that has been forced to adopt the trappings of Christianity, and Christmas can be celebrated by anyone, being that it is a celebration centred around giving, forgiveness and children. Christianity was forced upon Europeans. Europeans did much more of its evangelising through missionary work than, for example, Islam, which, if you really want to point the finger at a religion for brutal forced conversion, is a far better candidate.
This is the real truth:
http://chethondo.wordpress.com/2008/12/10/have-ironic-christmas-sweater-parties-run-their-course/
White people are effeminate euro-loving soccer-admiring wine-sipping late-drinking sissie nancies!
Real men are American, red blooded American, who drink beer not sissy wine, watch football BIG BALLS BIG HITS YEAH not pansy ass eurosoccer, work as a crane operator at a benchpress factory instead of the huffington post style-section editor.
REAL MEN HATE FOREIGNERS,SOCCER,SOCIALISM,WINE,CHEESE. BIG HITS YEAH! SOCCER IS GAY FOOTBALL IS MANLY AND TOUGH BIG HITS YEAH!
I think your horse is more worried about you molesting it than anything else. Put alil love in your heart.
hohoho muthaf**ka 🙂
OMG This site is so dead on!
I can relate to a lot of these things (Coffee, Hummus, The Onion, The Wire, Juno, Barack Obama, Traveling, David Sedaris, Snowboarding, St. Patricks Day, Facebook) but what really bugs me are White so-called Liberals. They are such snooty know-it-alls.
Case in point: my uncle – a super liberal White Person who loves wine and lives in DC – just got done telling me that Detroit deserves to fail because they weren’t building eco-friendly cars that Americans want. WHAT?? This is the perfect example of White Person mentality, and from what I can tell by what the media is saying about Detroit, this mentality is very commonplace. I would love for him to come down to 8 mile and tell one of the UAW guys what he thinks needs to be done with the Big 3.
My Uncle – a White Person with a LAW degree – suddenly knows how to fix the American car industry because of something he read in the NY Times. On TOP of that he feels all smug and superior about it because he is so environmental. Nevermind the hundreds of thousands of displaced workers (a TRULY diverse middle class) or what will become of the already decaying urban rust belt. No – Flyover country doesn’t matter. The future is all rich cities with expensive fair trade organic coffee, fake diversity, foreign hybrid cars, and non-bus public transit.
Merry Christmas!
http://www.jonesview.wordpress.com
After the party, save your sweater as a white elephant gift for another party.
You forgot to mention the venerable Toga party…
Yes they do host these parties. If you want to meet more white people, I suggest you look use the helpful tips in other posts to befriend and ingratiate yourself with the white folk.
Hope your hubby’s one of hat-wearing guys, ’cause it looks like the other two are into each other. Seriously, examine the picture and think about it. Imagine the situation. I’d bet on it.
someone needs to make friends with more white people
I love “late-drinking sissie nancies!” Most excellent, Chad.
Yes yes, very funny. Current and relevant, even timely. We have White Trash Parties out here. (I’m sure they’ve been commented on already.) I call them Billy Parties. You know, Rockabillies. Unfortunate thing though, they’re not in costume. (ok, I understand an ugly sweater isn’t a costume) They’re always dressed the same way and on Halloween they dress like famous Rockabillies or ghoulish monster variations of rockabillies, like rockabillie Dracula or Rockabillie Frankenstein. WoooooOOOoooo.
Er, maybe it’s time to have a Humorless White Liberal Party. Jeez, what would you wear? A tee shirts, shorts, pea coats, scarfs, bottled water, ipods, damn that sounds like, er, nevermind.
Hee hee.
You’re the whitest person here, you pretentious ass. “Gateau”? “Faux naif”? A non hang-ten use of “surf”? Go get laid.
“…Referring to people as your “white friends” is racist…..”
Nick, I do believe that you are more sensitive than you need to be….It is obvious that you were among blacks who must have at least ‘liked’ you because when you said back to them “Black kid” and “yoo, my main black boy..”….and you DID NOT get your ass kicked, then you were accepted as someone they knew…or at least tolerated….
Referring to you as a ‘white friend’ is just that….you are a friend who happen to be white among those persons black friends…It was not meant to be racist or bigoted…..believe me, if you called them black boy and black kid, and they did not know you or like you…..you would KNOW IT immediately..
“… we can finally be vindicated for this persecution we’ve endured for so long…”
White people being persecuted???…..LOL….you MUST be kidding!
The only white people in america who are persecuted are POOR WHITES….white america HATES poor white people…
For the rest of you?…persecuted??…..NOT!!
during the holidays, it seems every chubby gal dons the ubiquitous long red sweater with the Christmas tree on it….with leggings….
During the holidays, it seems MANY people (of both genders) of MANY sizes don unfortunate choices of clothing. It would also seem that people who use words like “ubiquitous” would have more brain cells than to make a specific comment about fat women. Using the term “chubby gal” isn’t cute or less offensive – you just think you sound clever. You don’t. You sound like someone who judges others based on their size. Merry Christmas, jerk – Love, a “chubby gal”
In response to this post left by Sarah Palin, Thank God for Barack Obama!
So you’re fat then, right? Are you upset because JRA described your life?
Yea I love mustachio bashios
pretty sure that was sarcastic..
Also, if you don’t like people calling you fat, there’s a solution-lose weight.
I have never heard of an ugly sweater party but it does sound like fun.
I just thought of something else white people like: StuffWhitePeopleLike.com
umm, Jason Swartzman is Jewish and so is Noam Chomsky, i think Jews that don’t practice Judaism are just as white as the other white people but those who do practice are!
Happy Chanukkah
Never heard of an ugly sweater party either. But had a good laugh at the bit about listening to Sufjan Stevens.
Actually, remember that the vast majority of classic ugly sweaters are hand knit. And no, not by rare SE Asian tribes or rainforest Indians. Instead look to extended relations in the farm belt, or as it is known today, the “red states”. Whatever yarn/thread that is available is used. For Christmas, be creative. Ad sparkles or colored pieces of pasta. Beads are always a favorite. For a more modern touch, how about sewing on a light-up plastic wreath or x-mass tree or Santa figurine. Better yet, some sort of small doo-dad that plays music too.
Minnesota, Wisconsin, the Dakota’s, southern Illinois and northern Michigan come to mind as classic “ugly sweater” production areas. Also upstate New York and rural Pennsylvania.
Yes its all ugly.
i just started hearing about these sweater parties but I was noticing people were throwing mustache parties, didn’t occur to me that it was cause they’re white but I get it now.
Also, I’m pretty white according to that website. I love jazz, barack and a whole host of stuff on the list. In fact, I’ve consulted the list for new things to get into. I now have a Sigg bottle cause of you!
This foolish cunt with whom I work wore an ugly sweater to the office Christmas party, loudly telling everyone how ugly the sweater was and gosh, isn’t that funny?
I hate that bitch.
I have been invited to both a mustache party and an ugly sweater party, but went to neither because they sounded sketchy haha
this site pisses me off
Me too. racists fucks
I love it!!! We only had one person show up to our ugly sweater party that was dressed! the other 75 people didn’t care I guess
I don’t think this site post was meant to offend anyone except make fun of white people
Wish I hadn’t already sent out the family Xmas cards.
I don’t have any major problem with this site but it would be better if it was ok for there to be a site called, “Stuff [any ethnic origin other than white] people like”. But if someone tried to do that, even if it were as harmless as this website is, the creators would be branded as violent racists, charged with generalizing and stereotyping a specific group of people and therefore be outcast for it. It’s a pretty awful double standard.
i went to one on saturday, and it was so fun! 🙂
Hahahah my roomate went to one of these! It was almost held at our house!
What is it about white men?
Everyone wants them! White, Asian, and now black too…
I hope you’re kidding. Sarcasm is always hard to detect on the Internet.
Haha I just helped my friend make an ugly sweater for one of these… its pretty flippen sweet. Alas, I have never been invited to one… I must not be the right kind of white person…
LOL; I find this particularly ironic because an acquaintance of mine decided to update her facebook today with pictures of their own Ugly Sweater Party. Her and her friends are making all these ridiculous faces with their drinks and party paraphernalia like they were so edgy and original to “come up” with such an idea. Seeing this now gave me a good laugh. Never been or been invited to one of these things myself and I can honestly say if I were going to host a party around this time of year, you bet your ass it’d be “Christmas” themed, be damned any religious differences.
AMERICA FUCK YEAH!!!
SOCCER FUCK NO!! FOREIGNERS/SOCCER IS LAME!
SOCCER IS A GAY HOMO FAG SPORT FOR FAGS (FOREIGNERS) AMERICA IS SO MANLY BIG MUSCLES TOUGH BIG HITS MACHO BIG BALLS YEAH BIG TOUGH YEAH FOOTBALL IS SO BIG YEAH BIG MUSCLE.
so its ironic that i would stumble on this post at this exact second, since in my other window i am looking at facebook pictures of my white friend’s ugly sweater party. though technically, from what i can see in the pictures, it wasnt just an ugly sweater party, but an ugly sweater MAKING party. more creative than the average white person, apparently.
George W. Bush Deserves a Fair Trial
http://exceptionmag.com/politics/perspectives/000107/george-w-bush-belongs-prison
I’ve never been to one …but now I want to …although it really just reminds me of Bill Cosby.
Wanna buy some sweaters?
Giant snowman deemed a public nuisance, safety hazard
By ELIZABETH BLUEMINK
ebluemink@adn.com
Published: December 21st, 2008 10:14 PM
Last Modified: December 21st, 2008 01:24 PM
Anchorage’s famous giant snow man, Snowzilla, finally met its match.
It wasn’t the weather. It wasn’t angry neighbors bearing shovels and pick axes.
It turns out Snowzilla’s biggest foe — the one who felled the controversial but much-loved giant — was a notice-bearing city code enforcement officer.
That’s right, Snowzilla was abated.
It was just a few years ago that 16-foot-tall Snowzilla arose in a residential yard in Airport Heights, launching an annual procession of local gawkers and an international media blitz.
Camera crews came from Russia and Japan.
ADVERTISEMENT
But Snowzilla attracted a lot of naysayers too.
Not everybody in the neighborhood liked all the cars and visitors.
So, city officials have deemed Snowzilla a public nuisance and safety hazard.
A few weeks ago, city code enforcers left three red signs at Snowzilla’s bottom body ball telling its builders to cease and desist.
The city also tacked a public notice on the door of the Powers family home at 1556 Columbine St. The Powers family and some of their neighbors have been building Snowzilla in the Powers’ front yard since 2005.
When the notices went up, Snowzilla still didn’t have a full torso or head.
“The kids had spent hours and hours of work on it,” Billy Powers said on Sunday.
City officials involved in the cease-and-desist order could not be reached for comment on Sunday.
But on Dec. 11, the city notified the Airport Heights community council about its decision to abate Snowzilla, telling council members that the two-story snowman caused increased traffic to the point of endangerment and that the structure itself was unsafe.
The city also asked council members to watch out for continued construction and to consider weighing in on Snowzilla at an upcoming, council members said.
At last Thursday’s community council meeting, no one offered a Snowzilla-related motion. “We’re not really a policing agency,” said Becky Kurtz, the council president.
Now, Snowzilla is just a big pile of snow rubble.
Powers said he doesn’t plan to rebuild.
He can’t.
Under the city’s nuisance abatement order, if he tries, he could get arrested.
Find Elizabeth Bluemink online at adn.com/contact/ebluemink or call 257-4317
I’m kinda glad I don’t wear sweaters much anymore.
Have a look at this site. It’s similar to this but the group being mocked has nothing to do with race.
http://www.thestuffdumbpeoplelike.blogspot.com/
I don’t recall attending one of these..then again I live in Miami, where winter is synonymous with 60 degrees F.
http://www.poeticmotherlover.com
Whatever happened to just plain sweaters.
Why all the colours and designs, looks terrible!
You’d never catch an Asian girl in an ugly sweater like THAT!
Two days after this post, I was invited to an Ugly Sweater party, almost on cue. The hostess also fits in the categories of “wants to live in Europe”, “wants multi-cultural children”, and of course “follows a religion different then her parents”. I love this site.
http://knowledgebasket.blogspot.com/
جزوات اساتید طراح سوال کارشناسی ارشد کشاورزی
ویژه داوطلبان آزمون کارشناسی ارشد سال ۱۳۸۷
فروش جزوات کارشناسی ارشد باغبانی
کارشناسی ارشد صنایع غذایی
کارشناسی ارشد حشره شناسی
کارشناسی ارشد بیماری های گیاهی
کارشناسی ارشد مبارزه با علفهای هرز
کارشناسی ارشد مدیریت کشاورزی
کارشناسی ارشد زراعت-تکنولوژی بذر
کارشناسی ارشد اصلاح نباتات
کارشناسی ارشد GIS
کارشناسی ارشد زمین شناسی وارشد خاکشناسی
کاردانی به کارشناسی تولیدات گیاهی
فروش جزوه ریاضی عمومی و زبان عمومی برای کلیه رشته های کارشناسی ارشد
تهیه و فروش انواع حشرات بصورت خشک(اتاله) یا زنده یا در داخل الکل و ارسال به تمام نقاط کشور در ۲۴ ساعت
09189184598 09329487866 09191812812 محمد آروین
۲۲۲۵۰۴۷-۰۲۸۲ دفتر ساعت 9صبح الی 18 عصر
۲۲۲۴۵۹۹-۰۲۸۲ تماس ساعت 21 شب الی 24 شب
شما با یکی از شماره های بالا تماس میگیرید و بعد از اعلام خرید جزوات کاردانی،کارشناسی یا کارشناسی ارشد(گرایش مورد نظرتون)و ذکر نام خانوادگی،استان،دانشگاه در حال تحصیل،شماره تماس خودتون .و دریافت قیمت جزوات اقدام به واریزی مبلغ جزوات مورد نظر می نمایید.شما هزینه جزوات را بعد از واریزی به
شماره حساب ۰۳۰۰۲۶۱۷۲۳۰۰۰ مهر بانک کشاورزی بنام محمد آروین
تماس میگیرید و شماره فیش واریزی خود و شعبه ای که واریز کرده اید و آدرسی که ما باید جزوات را به آنجا ارسال کنیم را اعلام میکنید. از زمان واریزی هزینه جزوات تا دریافت ۳ روز طول خواهد کشید.
یا (می توانید هزینه جزوات را از طریق کارت به کارت
(شماره کارت ۲۳۲۱ ۱۲۵۰ ۷۰۱۰ ۶۰۳۷ بنام محمد آروین با
شماره حساب ۰۳۰۰۲۶۱۷۲۳۰۰۰ مهر بانک کشاورزی واریز نمائید).
قبل از خرید جزوه با ما تماس بگیرید.
آدرس پستی : قزوین- شهر صنعتی البرز- صندوق پستی ۱۵۳۳
http://www.alonefarmer.blogfa.com
http://www.alonefarmer.blogfa.com
I have been invited to approximately eight of these this year. My university even had a campus-wide ugly-sweater contest.
It’s cool to be intentionally ugly these days.
So I was invited to a friend of mine’s “ugly sweater party” but before the party we all went out to an “ugly sweater dinner” at…golden corral.damn…
Αkkhk[ w[[[bkh[ww;ddkjh
I don’t believe a word you say.
Too bad Sufjan is Christian…
yeah, too bad, otherwise he might produce un-inspired garbage like what is mostly on the radio.
I love the crusades comment. White atheists always love to bring up the crusades as their last ditch argument against Christianity even though the destruction of jews during the holocaust and the murder of Russians during Stalin’s reign were all driven by atheism. this is what happens when intellectuals cease thining for themselves and beleive whatever the educational system tells them. that comment was the best part of the article.
oh and never mind how long ago the crusades were. it is all somehow relevant to defending Islam (which is a wonderful religion itself) which is somehow necessary to white people since they are only allowed to hate Christianity when they are atheists.
Also too bad the Crusades directly oppose Jesus’ words… A handy fact people like to forget when hating on those who follow the God of the Bible
Look, it’s stuff white people like … without a white person promoting it:
http://www.digitalcribs.net/DisplayVideo.aspx?id=972762594
Yup, I was invited to at least three ugly sweater parties this year. But strangely enough it was the first year this has happened.
LOL.
another gem. But if they’re playing Sufjan’s Christmas albums (why, yes, I just did buy the set for my wife for Christmas), they’re in for much more Jesus than the typical white person might safely assume. Imagine my surprise when WXPN (UPenn’s public radio station) played his version of “Come Thou Fount” today. I’m sure the righteous DJ was wearing an ugly sweater.
I was invited to three. White people are sadly unoriginal.
You forgot ugly sweater pub crawls
prison moms
http://journalofthieves.wordpress.com/2008/12/24/happy-holidays-from-the-journal-of-thieves/
I’m white as snow, but I don’t participate in these stupid ass parties. They’re for fat white people or dorky white people. I’m fit and cool. Damned sexy, in fact.
i just saw this reported on cnn.com those pics are priceless!
http://whitewomensuck.blogspot.com/
I actually played in a game of ugly holiday sweater grown-up dodge ball a few days ago. How white is that!!!
These are for frat rapists and idiots
This is the most hilarious, funniest blog I’ve ever read. Great stuff.
definitely one of the whitest things in western culture.
So, I usually consider myself hip on white culture, but when I first read this I thought “No way!” I have never heard of these special themed Christmas parties.
However, a week after reading it for the first time, I must apologize for my presumptuousness. I have been proven incorrect by a facebook album recently posted by one of my white friends. She attended a themed party and every sweater there was ugly, not to mention unnecessary because she lives in the sweltering heat of New Orleans.
stuffwhitepeoplelike.com is now my prime source for understanding white people because I can no longer rely on my own personal experiences.
I went to my first Ugly Sweater Christmas party the other night. I was not appropriately dressed, and the winner of the best-ugly-sweater competition had a light-up monstrosity that couldn’t be beat. Thank you for this post, it painted a hilarious picture.
white people love fat pop stars
http://journalofthieves.wordpress.com/2008/12/27/horribly-dressed-overweight-pop-stars-a-new-trend/
Though I’m constantly amused by this blog I’m more than quite surprised that the American Cancer Society didn’t make one of the chosen charities. It saddens me. Cancer is the scourge of the medical world. It needs all the help it can get.
Perhaps next year…
Being a white person and all, and never having heard of, let alone attended, an Ugly Sweater party, I initially found this to be a rather lame topic. Then my daughter came home from college and threw a sweater party (mostly at my expense…thanks to my wife) for 20-25 of her closest friends. I came home from work that night and saw the dog even wearing a damn sweater. Having learned the hard way, I have a little more respect for the entry now.
I hosted my first ugly sweater party this year. Why, sir, do you keep pegging us white-ies?
There must be a lot of elementary school teachers at these parties…they seem to LIVE for those hand-embroidered and bespangled Christmas sweaters.
shit and fall in it, go fuck yourself asshole.
He’s obviously been kidnapped.
check out http://www.handheldstory.com and learn how to read your palm for free!
My total count for sweater parties this holiday season: 7
That’s a new record.
And Joe, the post above, reading your palm is a great way to waste an hour of your life. Try reading my blog, you’ll actually learn something.
http://knowledgebasket.blogspot.com/
Whitey how’s my ass taste? White people are the worst!
This whole website is horrible and horribly racist..joking or not. It’s this sort of crap that people spit out that keep their own race down (no matter who you are). I had a friend ask me once if white people wore underwear because she believed they all go commando..and I wondered why she would have such a silly question or assumption..now I know why. So if white people are so easily grouped into stereotypes…what does that mean for half whites?
Or here’s a solution to people who like to pick on other people: Kill yourselves.
I’m skinny, but I hate when people bully other people about meaningless shit like weight. Mind you, I’m on StuffWhitePeopleLike.com, which is snarky but not outright hurtful … unless you are one of the assholes who thinks -this site- is -racist.-
I also love the shit you guys say about women, if by “love” you mean “am nearly driven to suicide by.” And I am, by the way, a guy.
Did all of you little boys used to get picked on for being faggots or for being fat? Or do you just have issues with your penis size?
All I have to say is if this was a site about what black people liked everyone would find it hilarious and there would be nothing racist about it. I am white, I can joke with other white people about being white just like any black, mixed, or anybody else can joke about who they are. If that offends you sorry, there is no reason for it to. You are just looking for something to be angry at. Back off and realize everybody who doesn’t look like you isn’t always racist, judging you, or out to get you. I can be proud of MY past just as you can of yours.
No, not so much. It doesn’t mean anything.
white people love fat myspace celebrities:
http://journalofthieves.wordpress.com/2008/12/31/myspace-celebrities-are-bound-to-have-a-bad-2009/
Please note that ‘ugly sweater parties’ are by no means a new phenomena – archaeological fieldworkers in the UK invented them in 1974.
I think the problem here is that this site is intended as a very subtle, acute poking fun at a certain set of white progressives whose influence on American culture has in recent years become greatly disproportional to their actual numbers, but people come on here who have no grasp of subtlety and in their knee-jerk way think that it’s all racist. That explains some of the comments below.
They’re in the same category as people who think Huckleberry Finn should be banned because it has the n-word.
OMG, I’d never even heard of these before reading this post!
Who would even think it up? Oh, yeah…. some crazy white person, that’s who! 😉
I’m just happy to laugh — isn’t everyone? We’re all pretty funny if we’re willing to laugh at ourselves.
Hilarious. Great post. You should check out THE 100 MOST ANNOYING THINGS. It’s equally as funny.
http://the100mostannoyingthings.blogspot.com/
If you are looking for an ugly sweater try Gottschalks clothing store. They have some of the most hideous Christmas Sweaters you will ever see.
HAPPY NEW YEAR WHITEY
http://journalofthieves.wordpress.com/2009/01/02/why-we-dont-miss-los-angeles/
!!!
I love the way this is written! Seriously! I definitely LOL’d.
http://birthdaymag.blogspot.com/
Month of December? May I remind all you of the “Catsweaters”, or what I affectionately call the The MidWest ? You know those folks who wear elastic pants with said sweater and say “You betcha’!” Those lovely people who consider Irish people ethnic, pepper to be a spice and Pizza Hut a restaurant? Now THOSE folks know a sweater!
As a lifelong white person, I can’t decide which is more pathetic. Stereotyping white people, or the fact that so many of these stereotypes are supposedly true. Although I had never heard of an ugly sweater party until I came to this site, it sounds like they are real according to the comments. That is so sad, that we are so ashamed of our history that we have to deny Christmas and hold a fuc#$%g sweater party instead. What is wrong with us? Have we let the elite white media (with liberal white guilt) brainwash us? Apparently so. Fortunately, I still attend Christmas parties and don’t own any ugly sweaters. How stupid. Oh and I often vote Republican and dont mind admitting it. Oh, and I have a Master’s Degree. Go figure.
Great post as ever – Happy New Year 🙂
Your comment is multiple lines of someone talking straight out of their ass and hoping the fact that they have a degree will give them cred.
It doesn’t.
I did some research into ugly sweaters.
http://www.joepettis.com/2008/10/seasonal-sweaters-great-part-of_08.html
It’s amazing how something we would hate to wear as a kid becomes so cool when we are adults.
oh, and by the way, cracker barrell is the best place to buy seasonal sweaters, but if you want to buy them online, each image on my blog links to a site where you can buy one of the greatest ugly sweater of all time
ugly sweaters and trannies
http://journalofthieves.wordpress.com/2009/01/04/max_in_echoyahoocom/
that’s so played out only corney white people still do that, check some cool stuff http://www.revoint.com
Man, I really now regret this past holiday season. It is true. We didn’t put up a tree or anything. We were going to – we wanted to – but then I was watching CNN and Wolf Blitzer said something and BAM! I was under some sort of liberal media spell. Right away, me and the roommates decided to take religion out of the season and instead invite friends over to have a good time while wearing obnoxious sweaters. You and me, fellow lifelong white person, we’ll get ’em next year.
Go ME!!! I agree with you.
FUNNY…and true…some of this stuff is pure exagerations…but why be ashamed of traditions?
I’ve never been to one of these it doesn’t sound too fun BUT I love the idea of all of my friends wearing mustaches. I’ve never heard of a mustache party.
Yeah, doesn’t Me know that smart people vote Democrat, because voting Democrat is smart (because it’s what smart people do)?
Also, Noam Chomsky said the media isn’t liberal, so it can’t be.
You forgot the ‘Redneck Party’ and the ‘White Trash Bash’. So proud.
hahaha and we thought we were being original . . .
I have always wanted to have an ugly sweater party, Christmas sweaters specifically. I also enjoy throwing Rockband extravaganzas. These are two special activities that white people enjoy.
Uhm. It’s just satire.
It’s for the laffs.
No one is actually trying to insult us.
I am new to the internet and to being white. This guide will surely help me to be a successful white person. I am already offended by this liberal media, offended for the Palestinians, stopped buying bottles of water from warehouse stores and adopted a rare breed of dog from India as a pre-baby to test my and my new husband’s arranged marriage. And if it’s not working out, we will go to couple’s counseling. White people seem to like that too.
ha, its so true!
so so true.
I went to my first one this year. Everyone was expecting that I give this long elaborate explanation of how I got my sweater and I just said: “I picked it up in the women’s section at the clothing store today. I figured going to the women’s section while being a guy would produce something especially hideous.” Everyone in the conversation (all white) were so insulted they didn’t talk to me for the rest of the night.
Yes, why would anyone mind if you insulted them based on their gender? Especially women!? Fuck women. You are so very right in your actions. WTF eh?
Check out the Funky Sweater Git Down. A trend has a theme song.
Check out BaadSheep.com for some seriously ugly sweaters! They have stuff all colors of people like!
And they even name their sweaters!
http://www.baadsheep.com
LMAO!!! That is so funny!! And soooooo true. If they can’t take a joke…at a party….oh well! HAHAHA!
Speaking of themed parties, don’t forget about that consummate white-person activity of watching the Superbowl just for the commercials.
I’m always a little embarrassed when I read a post on here and say to myself, “That’s me.”
I really like, “That’s kind of awkward because, you know, the Crusades?”
too true. and what’s even worse about this is that at our ugly holiday sweater party my friend had the exact same tie as in the picture
I wonder how many people from that OTHER web site are reading this right now … you know who you are
DUDE:
“Hey man, nice sweater. It’s so ugly.”
“Yeah, when my family first got to this country we had to shop at Goodwill, this is the first one my father bought to get him through his first winter here. Good thing they didn’t have these parties back then, right? He would have died.”
“Geez, man, I’m sorry, you can cut in line for egg nog.”
😦
this scenario totally applies to me…when my parents first moved here do you know how many passed down clothes I got? …lets just say enough to have an 80’s party!! LMAO
(I grew up in the 90’s/21st century) these clothes had already been passed down atleast twice before they got to me..
Wait, this is actually a real phenomena?
Oh, it’s a phenomena.
…you’re not white, are you?
Those are the wrong kind of white people.
uhh but white people do have Christmas parties too???
Ugly Sweaters are my favourite thing in this world!
My God… My friends and I had one of these a few weeks back and when I happened upon this I burst out laughing. I guess I’m white through and through!
Only the wrong kind of white person would have that kind of party. A winter season party is for the right kind of party, I was invited to a kwanza party, that was good.
We like to celebrate our ugly sweater parties on the official intergalactic Cosby Sweater Day, January 23rd 2009. And yes we are white.
i dont see how Christmas forces christianity on people when they made santa so it wouldnt..
and i am very disapointed that my ugly sweater party got cancelled due to snow :[
That’s a good idea…
We have ugly sweater parties pretty randomly… but never too close to a major holiday and preferably in the colder months… for obvious reasons.
There’s a black guy liking that thing that white people like in the photo there. Has he been informed?
I was in doubt until I saw evidence with my very own eyes.
White people MUST BE STOPPED!
The link got snatched.
Here’s the code
photobucket.com/albums/nn201/stagolee7/ugly-sweater-party-002.jpg
Been White all my life (more than a half-century now). Have never heard of such a thing — though party-goer to the max. Also, have never heard of Sufjan Stevens. Do I have to turn in my White Card?
Are you certain this is a White Thing? I suspect it might be “Toronto Thing” rather.
Kay, you may not be the right kind of white person.
That, ironically, is much worse than being the type of white person described on this site.
Please refer to Stuff White People Like #14 “Having Black Friends”
He was probably just dragged along and put up with it in good sport… or research purposes.
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/21/14-having-black-friends/
Not to mention the whole – its really a pagan holiday and heysus was born in spring or something like that…. but thats a whole other story…
Hey is “Discussing the Accuracy of Religion” on the site? From my experience us white people LOVE debating the accuracy of religion.
Like ‘Token’ from South Park? Here’s the deal. Our parents gave is sweaters we mocked and when they died the joke ended and we wore their sweaters and felt ashamed of our jest. RIP
“If I ain’t the wight kinda white poisson, am I wong?”
I see. Parties! Charity! Beer and Sweaters! (hopefully not beer, or worse, ON sweaters. But maybe that’s why the guests wear sweaters they don’t like…)
I think you’re right: I’m all wrong. You see, ironically, the sweater in the poster looks GREAT to me — far from ugly, it’s a cable-knit sweater just like Mom used to knit. I wore them proudly from junior high through university, and would wear them still if only they hadn’t mysteriously become so tiny.
Okay, maybe not the purple one. But I picked out the wool for that one.
ugly sweaters are just an excuse to be warm up in canada (they’re also sweaters are just hilarious)
Hey Kay. I was invited to an ugly sweater for the first time in my life this past December and sure enough, it was by white people. This may be a more recent development among young people, hence the reason you probably haven’t heard of it. Hell, I haven’t heard of them until I was invited to one. Then again, I’m not white. Anyway, I’ve heard of Sufjan Stevens but never listened to the music. I always assumed it was pretentious indie type stuff white people liked. Maybe it’s good though.
Genius. The first Ugly Sweater Party that I went to was back in Nov and and it combined two from the list, as it was a post Rugby(#95) Match party as well.
ahah this site is genius. unfortunately after reading it i feel whiter than ever. girls with bangs, organic food, and – cherry on top of the cake – wes anderson movies – those are so correct. i feel a mix of ashamed and immensely amused.
keep up the good (and ironic) work -> that means that probabbly white people like
#121 stuff that white people like
😛
I give all my ugly sweaters to my puppy. Speaking of puppies, my friend just got this new puppy and he plays with it by putting a chew toy in his mouth and letting the puppy try to rip it out. It’s kinda funny. Check it out: http://TwitPWR.com/2Z0/
Ugly Sweater Parties are too white and too nerdy, even for me.
Jews are too white people.
Whiteness is not the exclusive property of affluent Anglo-Saxon Protestants.
Shanty Irish, Dagos, Polacks, and basic Po White Trash are all white people, so how can Jews not be?
And overprivileged Jews, which is a lot of them, are often the very kind of extra-white goofballs being lampooned on this site.
Texas Corollary: Ugly Shorts parties around the Winter holidays. Extra points for prep-school/Ivy League fashion.
This may have been noted already; haven’t read the first twenty pages of remarks.
But it has just dawned on me that the Ugly Sweater Party is likely a weird bastard child of the U.K. novel-then-movie “Bridget Jones’ Diary”, in which a man — later to be of key romantic interest — appears at an Xmas or New Year’s party (now which was it?) in a sweater that is mocked mightily for its ugliness, in the mind of our terminally single heroine/diarist.
These parties are ridiculous, i only recently heard of them as a co-worker attends one annually with her friends/family. I find conversation with her about the party and having to view the pictures to be a wast of my life. I’m sure one of my whitest friends will eventually bring up how he/she wants to do this, I will not attend.
The best part about this is the black guy in the picture.
the hell it is. These parties have been going on long before that terrible movie. They’re commonly referred to as Cosby sweater parties because the the sweaters Bill Cosby wore in the 80’s.
I am outraged! I have never heard of these parties, not a peep!
As soon as I read this information, I immediately called white people head quarters to ask why I was not notified only to be told that I’m more beige than white, so I was not included on any guest lists.
So I called the National Alliance of Beige people and the best alternative they could suggest was attending a ‘Men In LacyThongs’ party.
After careful consideration I have to admit it’s a great idea. Not only can I avoid any insensitive religiously oriented references, I can also prove I am comfortable with my sexuality (ie-not homo phobic, in ‘whitese’) by wearing my wife’s underwear and drinking with my beige brethren.
never heard of this buy I’m white and I like it!
Okay, thanks for update. I stand corrected. In that case,
is the idea that white people do the parties as a homage to old television shows starring black people (a concept linked to Items no. 116, 71, 29, and of course, 50?)
Why is it funny there’s a black person in the photo?
Years back we used to have ugly shirt parties .
much along the same lines .
Like socks an a rooster.
Uh, because it’s a page about white people?
JES your an idiot. why is it funny that this WHOLE SITE is about white people?
we play skrewdriver at my parties.
Wow, ugly sweaters, homely women, cheap beer and cheesy racist lyrics set to the sounds of African-American Rhythm & Blues/Rock & Roll backdrop.
Sounds like it falls far short of “fun”.
Wow, reminds me of the sweaters you normally get as a Christmas present from a good-intentioned relative who has no fashion sense
I think this is just a homely old woman thing.
No kidding… Now me and the fellas got another reason to get togeather and DRINK BEER! HOT DAMN! Put them ugly Sweaters that we cut the sleves off of to good use besides cleaning up dog poop and giving back to grandma to make quilts with!
I wasn’t aware that the Spaniards that led Spanish Crusades for Christianity were white. I guess you really do learn something new every day.
Now this entry just gives ‘white people’ more ‘fun ideas’ … they’ll latch onto this shit. congrats for doing the white folk a favor.
Spain is a country not an ethnicity. There are all ethnicities in modern day Spain. However, during the crusades they were pretty white. American, English, Irish and Scotish people aren’t the only white people in the world btw.
Right, so after the crusades the people of Spain just slowly became less white? Are you completely retarded or just half? Spanish people definitely make up their own ethnicity, just like Puerto Ricans do. Apparently you feel that all American people are white? I don’t know where to begin. Just so you know, every single white person in America is originally from Europe. The only people that were in North America before the Europeans came over were the NATIVE Americans and the other indigenous peoples of what is now Mexico. I’m sorry that your sixth grade history teacher failed you so horribly.
Ethnicity is entirely a cultural construction and has no real basis. Spanish people have all skin tones from the whitest white to the darkest brown. The brown skinned Spanish people you are referring too are of Moorish/Muslim descent so it is unlikely that they were Crusaders.
I’m sorry that the American education system failed you.
OMG I’m so white. I had one of these parties in December.
I showed up to one of these deals w/o an ugly sweater and no one really talked to me or my wife… I think we lost whiteness points
Okay… I’ve been reading this site for a while now and I gotta say… I’m the whitest, white girl (surrounded by the whitest family and friends) and this list does not apply to anyone I know. I mean, we like “wine” and “Halloween” (as examples), but not for the completely fake, demeaning reasons the author states. We’re not all obsessed with how we APPEAR towards others. This is the author’s basic assumption; that all white people care about is how they are percieved by other white people.
Yes, I AM aware that this list is meant to be satirical, but it misses the mark and is incredibly racist instead. Calls for tolerance for this kind of discrimination, discussions about satire, rude interjections about “not taking yourself so F-ing seriously” miss the point. True racial satire works like reverse psychology; we’re horrified while we laugh. (Watch Blazing Saddles for a great example of true racial satire.)
This list’s stated purpose is to help non-white people “get stuff” out of white people. In other words, do these things, and you can humor and amuse a white person so much that they’ll do anything for ya. Essentially, our author (who is white himself) argues that all white people are mindless idiots.
Still don’t think it’s racist? Try to set up a blog titled “What Hispanic People Like” and then fill it with glib stereotypes – you can bet their won’t be any book deals… just outcries of racism.
I just need to give that comment a high five, that was awesome.
I have just logged onto this site (as a black person married to a white person) and I couldn’t agree more with the sentiments expressed by Karen. While many laugh at this so called witty satire, I wonder how many of the those leaving these blogs would find anything satrical about a blog featuring negative and childish streotypes about “What Black people like” . Laughing about sterotypes designed to belittle races is not clever or funny.
I think that your comments are especially ironic considering that the most successful black/hispanic/whatever comedians have all seemed to make a name for themselves by examining and playing on racial stereotypes. Most don’t stay within the boundaries of just their own race either. I think it would be tough to find a comedian, who isn’t white, that doesn’t anchor their career on stereotypical racist humor. If you can, I guarantee you that they still live at home with their parents.
You have visited a website called “Stuff White People Like” and as a white person you are offended, maybe somewhat surprised that the content within is stereotypical? I guess a blog entitled “What Karen Likes” might be a little more fitting for you.
spanish people, from spain are white. other than the people of muslim/arabic descent, most spaniards are christians and are white, just like any other person originally from europe. the spanish and portugese went to the americas in the 1500s and mixed with the indigenous people there, and that’s why they are not “white” in south america or mexico.
My paternal grandparents were born in Mexico and definitely had the colouring and characteristics of the indigenous people. My dad, who looked just like his father in every other way (fortunately), was extremely light skinned with almost black hair. We had an ancestor from Portugal circa 1700s who showed up all these years later.
Karen,
First of all, this site isn’t poking fun at ALL white people; it’s really aimed at overeducated hipster/yuppie types who are, in reality, the image-obsessed, pretentious a-holes the blog makes them out to be. How do I know? Well, I am one, and just about every item on this list applies to me and my hipster/yuppie “friends”: I own a pea coat, for example, and I just bought sea salt the other day. It’s a joke–have a laugh.
Secondly, calling this “racist” is really kinda dumb. Racism ALWAYS implies an assymetrical power relation. Stigmatized, marginalized minorities can’t really be racist vis-a-vis the dominant majority group. Imagine a group of poor black sharecroppers in the Jim Crow south thinking they were racially superior to white people. Would you castigate those people as “racist”? And if you did, would it matter? That is, are you, as an offended white person, in some way “victimized” by this site? In the same way as a disenfranchised minority is victimized by hatemongering?
#101 Being Offended
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/28/101-being-offended/
Sean ether’ed the whole damn thang.
Well-played.
oh my god the guy on the left looks like my dad. i’m not even joking. wow.
Oh my Karen, you may be the whitest my friend and maybe the most naive as well. Though Mr. Lander is definitely personifying himself by all means he is also personifying a culture. A culture that I definitely grew up in and gotta say a culture that I hated. The douche bags that wear the sweaters every year and the douche bags that are into indie music/recycling are two different animals. However with the incredible wealth these kids are offered does it really matter? I mean are you the recycling kid or the sweater party kid. I’m pretty sure they are alot different. But maybe the indie recycler is a little less pretentious. lol fuck I don’t know. But really this is a book about the white middle class and the things offered to you in a particular environment. An environment that every private school kid that went to college,fraternized/sororitized and climbed at a bouldering gym while high off their ass has experienced. Actually Karen I’m glad you don’t get this sweater party thing. Cause if you did it might mean you are that asshole with the red reindeer sweater that I’d like to bludgeon. Godspeed Karen, godspeed.
It’s called Dave Chapelle, Chris Rock, Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy and so on and so on. Do they need to blog about black people so you’ll feel like a white persons blog isn’t racist. I would use expletives but I’ll keep it hyper-sensitive for you and say you need to grow a pair and try to laugh at yourself as well as others. We are just human and blacks, whites, asians and whoever have great cultural differences whether you like it or not so naturally we’ll all have different “perceived differences”….and so what we are all different. As a black man I wish you would start a blog about “What black people like,” cause honestly I’d really fuckin like to know, seeing that I’m white and all.
I guess I won’t be having a third annual ugly sweater party, AKA “Christmas with the Huxtables”. 😦
It’s a joke…people actually have ugly sweater parties though. I had one…it rocked.
P.S Notice how everyone in the picture is young. Younger adults actually get together wearing hidious clothes.
Truth be told though, everyone needs to calm down all the things the author is saying is in a joking way. He takes a funny situation that is common between white people and exaggerates it to make it more funny…it’s quite simple folks.
This post reminded me of a time a couple of years ago when me and my white friends decided to combine a mustache party with cinco de mayo: cinco de mustache. No one shaved their mustaches for a month and then we got drunk on May 5th.
seriously is this true? i never knew this…i don’t have any white friends to confirm this…
I disagree with your definition of racism. I’d say that racism is an unfounded hatred/dislike of another race or prejudice based on skin colour. With that is the fact that your race is better than the prejudiced. If you want to learn about racism, come to South Africa. Every race group thinks it is superior to the others, EVERY.
Just stumbled upon this website. Thought this post was funny because I was invited to my first ugly sweater party over the holidays and had never even heard of it.
Oh my God… I’d never HEARD of this – I googled ‘ugly sweater party’ just for the hell of it – and got all these Flickr hits of people’s ugly sweater parties!!! this really exists!!
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a muslim man is BY DEFINITION , women-hater and imprisoner , dirty hussein
Good God these parties scare me!!!!
Check it out here:
http://freedomhaters.org/?q=content/freedom-haters-salutes-stuff-white-people
Hell-arious parody of Stufff White People Like on the humor site
called Freedom Haters.org.
Hi, Average American Male. Why you hate soccer? You know lots of Americans are like to play soccer. You do not talk like average American male. I think you just lost your mentality. I think there is lots of americans who play sports better than you. Go to US professional soccer team and say your comment. You will see what happen. You are not athletic, you just average American male. If you like football that much, why don’t you get drafted on NFL and get superbowl title by yourself?
Some ppl wants white men, but not everyone.
Uh… Do u really think white people really like this kind of stuff? I rather to be go to bar or beach or park with others.
Ugly sweater? Hell no!!!
Eww… You and your friends did not shave mustaches for a month? Where you work, man? Nasty…
Yeah…, That’s true, probably. It is better than doing crazy thing.
Oh…, god. Did you really bought sea salt and pea coat because you want to have fun? I guess you really have lots of money. Do you really need that stuff for your life? Give me your sea salt. Give me your peacoat. If you have your ugly sweater, give that to me so make sure I can wear that everyday.
Then go to club and have sex with stranger and get sick.
I am so sorry but I think we have more fun to using them than UK. So I think that idea became ours.
No, they are not worst. People who discriminate others are worst. It is not only based races, it also between handicap, mental status and difference of lifestyle, etc. The worst counts more than races.
Hahahahahahahaha……., lol.
Oh yeah? They do look cooler than you. I do not look at appearance, I look at attitudes.
Nice!
Dude, dodge ball came from Japan.
I’m absolutely throwing a USP when I move into my own apartment. I’m so excited. We’re going have a gingerbread cookie decorating contest!
Um, sorry, but I’m failing to see how a Christmas party imposes Christianity onto anyone. If they aren’t Christian, they aren’t being forced to come.
im pretty sure this guy is sarcastic. just saying.
i have yet to be to, or hear of an USP…. but as such, i think i will throw one this year!!!
I have been to several and I love the lines from the people that wear nice sweaters, “What, this is the ugliest sweater I own!” they are jerks and I am sick of them. I recently told one of my black friends, I have many, that I am not going all out on the ugly sweaters anymore. I try hard, as most graduates from Catskill State do, we are the Harvard of the East afterall. Why should I be the one who gives all of the effort and all I get is this stupid bowling trophy! I am going to get a fair trade coffee and listen to some Mos Def to relax.
people really do this?
Yeah, they’re a bit awkward after a while. I went to one last December. We ended up going to a 24-hr WalMart and pretending to be incestuous, sexually ambiguous, white trash. That part was fun and we made the real white trash feel better about themselves, so win-win.
I don’t know, but Sufjan Stevens Christmas music is amazing :P.
and I’m all down for the ugly sweaters.
yeah, pretty sure that this is a piss-take and not even remotely serious. what is it with americans not getting sarcasm?
Oh man. My friend had one of these. I had no idea it was a ‘real party’ or a phenomenon like this. I thought he was just being clever. Damn.
my friends have an ugly sweater party at their bar every year, although the ugliest sweaters they can find come from the 80s, so you cant tell which is the theme – ugly sweater, or awful 80s, haha!
I hate these parties, because I can’t wear a thin, tight shirt to show off my rippling pecs.
i think pretentious white people should have kwanzaa parties. along with all the pretentious black people who actually celebrate kwanzaa. they’re perfect together…and instead of hideous sweaters, wear your most hideous dashiki.
I have never even HEARD of an ugly sweater party. For this, I am very thankful. Also I’m surprised I haven’t because according to this blog, I am probably at least 70% white person!
it’s even more awkward if you’re saying that last part and you ARE white… then they don’t feel bad for you, they get confused and sometimes aggressive lol
IGNORANCE IS HOW WARS ARE STARTED
I’m white, and I have never heard of nor attended something like this. Must be a suburban yokel thing.
CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.
I call them Cosby Parties. Bunch of faggot honkies listening to Weezer and pretending they’re super cool.
Kingmob loves world of warcraft, and i love kingmob.
But do they serve vegan eggnog?
You do realize there is a black person in that picture…with so many so-called “sweater parties” going on you would think there would be an abundance of pics with just whites in it
This website is great…
Here’s another hilarious website you should take a look at: http://www.somethingyoushouldread.com
Just saw another hilarious parody of Stuff White People Like on freedomhaters.org.
This time they add to the list, muskets and the Boston Tea Party.
I highly recommend checking it out here:
http://www.freedomhaters.org/content/another-freedom-haters-salute-stuff-white-people
I love this site!
Check out this humor site too: http://www.somethingyoushouldread.com
but…white people love to have black friends 🙂
the best party i attended last year was an ug sweater party…i totally give in to this cliche 🙂
except a white person got all in my face about my glasses, and thats not very white-to-white friendly…oh well…dude was a monster!
cheers
Always wear a sweater!
Ugly sweater parties are the shit! Bill Cosby knew what was up.
Only to just brag about how down they are beacuse they have ONE black friend.
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Im in class really bored i googled white people and this came up. wtf coffee sucks, who ever made this is a pussy. This isnt white, we;ve got class ragheads, lick my prostate….WHITE POWER! haha jk ur alright
wtf. theres a black person in the picture.. XD
I’m so white I wear my normal sweaters to these parties.
The article fails to mention how much we can drink though.
I think white people can take alot of booze. And not just the ones who say they’re Irish because it;s the cool kind of white.
I got an ugly sweater for fathers day…
http://messedupparentingtips.wordpress.com/
Well, i always use easy sweater wear even i am in Tropical Season as well.
any way thanks for your information on blog.
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Check out this song “Liberal White Girl” it’s pretty funny like this blog
A good Sweater Party. Wait a minute…you mean to tell me you’ve never been to a good Sweater Party before?..Then just see the above blog…….Enjoy guys……
ok.. first of all… wtf is all this bullshit about americans not liking the AMERICAN FLAG or and of that other bullshit!? ok whoever made this,had to have been a towel head or sumthin cuz aint no american gonna sit on tha side and listen to folks talk shit bout their own race or their country! im white and im proud but its actually called caucasian 🙂 thanks. and this is all white ppl ur talkin bout sweetie so what the hell is that black guy in that picture for?! its ok ti u start calling him white. hell no.
🙂 next time u decide to write some total bs about american ppl, GET YUR FACTS STRAIGHT! AND LEARN SOME ENGLISH 🙂
Lisa, YOU learn some English. Your grammar and spelling is incorrect throughout your entire comment.
First of all, this “towel head” you’re so infuriated by is Christian Lander. Please refer to this Wikipedia article before you read further: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_Lander.
Christian isn’t saying that AMERICANS don’t like the American flag… He is pointing out the fact that “white” people don’t. And by “white,” he doesn’t necessarily mean “Caucasian.” If you’ve been living in America for the past 5 or so years, you should know which stereotype he is referring to. You obviously have not had the pleasure of encountering a “white” person during your lifetime, and so you probably don’t think this website is comical at all. You should probably go spend your time doing something more productive than bitching about something you don’t even understand.
Oh, Lisa, Lisa.
Seems like the southern education system’s gone further down the drain.
I always thought ‘towelhead’ was the thing of poor satire. Never figured anyone was as stupid or ignorant to actually use it in everyday speech.
there is a black dude in this picture also wearing an ugly sweater. is that not folding over on your point or what?! or is he just like a full-size cardboard figure of my cousin!? maybe…just maybe this blog is a JOKE! and drinking is always appropriate as long as you have an ugly sweater. cool clothes and imported white people drinking materials do not mix. what if you pass out or puke over your awesome totally-not-white-people clothes? that is just a bummer. so..ug;y sweaters are reusable after multiple regurgitations/
there is a black dude in this picture also wearing an ugly sweater. is that not folding over on your point or what?! or is he just like a full-size cardboard figure of my cousin!? maybe…just maybe this blog is a JOKE! and drinking is always appropriate as long as you have an ugly sweater. cool clothes and imported white people drinking materials do not mix. what if you pass out or puke over your awesome totally-not-white-people clothes? that is just a bummer. so..ug;y sweaters are reusable after multiple regurgitations/
Things white people like: having arguments on the internet with people of obviously inferior intelligence.
Things REALLY white people like: ironically commenting on such internet arguments, making himself seem superior to everyone else.
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE, who only WASTE their money on things like organizing ugly sweater parties.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
Having black friends is one of the things that white people
Freedomhaters.org has another really hilarious parody of Stuff White People Like.
Their entrees include, Madame Curie, Blackface, and The Music of Easter Island. I highly recommend checking it out here:
http://www.freedomhaters.org/content/yet-another-salute-stuff-white-people
Stuff White People Like # 2,478
Being ever vigilant in pointing out how dumb/rascist people must automatically be one of those Eeeevvviillll Southerners.
I am white and I find everything in this book to be wrong and appalling. I do not know who wrote it or what color they may be but I feel like they live a very sheltered and misguided life. These are steriotypical statments and are nothing but the opinion of one racist mind. As soon as we learn that it is not the color of your skin that determines what you like and dislike, but where you come from and how you are raised, the world will be a less judgmental and better place to live in.
An outraged eighteen year old.
You don’t get this blog because…
a) You’re too stupid to pick up on irony and satire or too stupid to interpret it and process the humor
b) You’re not perceptive enough to realize that the author is poking fun at a certain subculture of white people
c) You’re hypocritical because you spew sanctimonious and nonsensical bullshit about race relations, but due to your homogeneous friend base you think the social trends being presented must be chimeric creations of a racist(and apparently ‘sheltered’) bigot
d) If c is correct, you REALLY don’t get this blog
e) You understand it, but the anglo-saxon in you refuses to be amused. see #101 – being offended
e) All of the above
I’m white and I think its hilarious! (Mostly because it’s true!) LOL
“An outraged eighteen year old.”
Fail
You do realize this is supposed to be ironic?
stuff white people like:
spelling white with a lower case w
writing lower case like e.e. cummings
e.e. cummings
How do you know you conceited jerkoff?
I have to agree… just imagine if it were about black people. There would be outrage, whether it were intended to be “ironic” or “humorous” or not. Yet it’s culturally acceptable to make fun of white people.
I love this “outraged 18 year old”
I love your poor grammar. Go back to school, and lighten up in the interim.
Things this white person likes: ironically self-deprecating humor. AKA why I read this blog and why I’m replying to this particular comment. 🙂
I love this anonymous comment too! The patriotism is just inspiring!!
I love that immediately she (presumptious, I know, but there are smiley faces and odd uses of “sweetie”)
STARTS USING CAPS TO REALLY ASSERT A POINT and then
asserts the author
“had to have been a towel head”
Clearly, Christian Lander is Arabian!!!!
Go back to the icanhazcheezburger website to use your smileys and wtfs and ppls and YURs.
Clearly, you have mastered the English language so fully that you can operate beyond its parameters and shorten people to ppl!
And VARY your SENTENCE structure WITH caps and NONCAPS!
Delightful.
This white person makes my day, if only for flying into a rage online.
ummm, there is a black person in the photo too. FYI. He’s right there, in the middle. He’s wearing a red tie, a santa clause hat, and oh ya, he has black skin. Just thought I would point that out. Black people like ugly sweater parties too
Please see: “Being Offended”
i guess you like to be offende like most other white people HAHAHAAH you set yourself uo for that
im white and i dont i find this mean or offensive i think its funy, why are you even on this site if your so easly offended. GET A FUCKING LIFE!
Black skin? GTFO, I was thinking more like “dark brown”.
“I love your poor grammar. Go back to school, and lighten up in the interim.”
LOL AT GRAMMAR
White people certainly do not like Dane Cook, and Abraham Lincoln calls him out on it…
http://lincolnsaysuncool.wordpress.com/2009/07/20/lincoln-says-uncool-dane-cook/
I had an ugly sweater-themed birthday party. It was a hit. I made all my guests wear ugly sweaters except for me.
I’m a very white female ugly-sweater party attendee and never has the subject of the party become a religious regime against christianity. Being a middle-classed white person entitles most of the population-wether religious or not-to some type of themed article of clothing, being an atrocious halloween vest your grandmother made for you when you were 5, or an ugly christmas sweater your mother thought was so “precious.” As for having a reason to drink an alcoholic beverage and celebrate all things equal, why the hell not?
This should come as no surprise to anyone whose ever seen a Beck video. Gen-x simply has multiple orgasms over anything intentionally hideous. Many, many levels of elitism going on here, not to mention a lack of humor about themselves (note the defensive tone of some of these comments). What I’ve always found most distasteful about intentional bad taste is that these people (most of them anyway) look down their noses at people who, say, have concrete lawn statues for real, not for its “camp” value. Susan Sontag said it best, to speak camps name is a betrayal. Pure camp is always niave. Camp which knows itself to be camp is less satisfying. The ultimate camp statement: Its good because its awful. What irony junkies white people are.
Ugh. At some point, you overcome the joy of irony, and just admit that something sucks. Ugly sweaters? Suck. Not funny. Just suck.
Ah, the ugly sweater party. This is very like the “I’m turning 33 so I’ll have a Jesus theme party, since, you know, that’s how old he was when he died.”
I nearly got thrown out of an office party in my employment developer for the mentally disabled, joking about how far the office is going with the “Holiday, no Christmas” thing. I had the organizer walk up to me with a tough face, points at me and say” Hey, I don’t want any discussions, jokes or comments relating to topics like politics, religion, rules and morals” but used typically advanced white people terms like polity and “I don’t want any racism in my office regarding Christians, Catholics, Jews, Mormons, Muslims or any other faith, its’ a right for people to choose their faith”. God shut up, what are you, the chief of the P-C police or a card-carrying member of the ACLU? Nope, I knew her being in the GOP, who made the USA fearful of atheism, secularists or agnostic thinking is destroying the Holiday spirit anyway. +
wite peeple kan b smrt. we kan spel ch@t speek. 1337leet. we shur be l z n txt in. o yea blaks kant read spel , dont go on net. we dont a h8 ni99rs. wmn unda 30 rite bad der. poore reds nex frum teh so worse. pleez speek eng. ttyl cu8ltr+
Translation (too racist to complete):
We’re white means we’re smart. We just talk in chat speak or 1337 leet crap. We are lazy when it comes to texting. We assume black people never get on the internet. We pretend to like, in reality, kind of hate African Americans. Women under agre 30 do not write any better, and low-income white people from the south are worst in spelling, grammar skills and punctuation, in which it is not always true. We prefer you speak English, our native language. Talk to you later and we shall see you in another time. +
Hey Alex, where’s your fellow “Totally spies”: Sam or Clover from high school? You got a message from the WOOHP spy agency in Beverly Hills. The cartoon show you may hadn’t heard of is so popular, it has a movie that premiered in France, where the cartoon is animated. LoL! You know I watch that stuff, your (stereo) typical 18-year old girls.
I really get this blog, and the answer is “e”. I bet the racist white boys watching Totally Spies rather like the blond one (Clover), not the smart one (Sam) and my fave character is Alex, and they say “I’ll go for the brown-ethnic-lookin’ one”. +
Code word for American: “Yankee with Dixiecrat mentality on other races of people, and has an old world aristocratic nobility mentality”. Double for Californians, triple for west L.A. folk or San Franciscans. I’m surprised we hadn’t got in a revolution or a civil war in the 20th century (we’re in the 21st, 2009) when a ruling class preach against how they act: “Dress casual-trendy expensive imported casual, we don’t need to work on Fridays, you lil’ proletariat drone”. +
I never will wanna marry a … liberal white girl. But may be on the path where I live here in southern Cal. Also in my family tree, I had one grandfather (Mom’s side) and a father (his first wife, not my Mom) married women with either money or not in poverty, but “liberal white guys” love rich independent-minded women and we’re not dependent lazy sissies. I think it’s a good match. xD
“I’m glad I’m in America, the land of the free, except if you’re Black or Gay… or Cherokee. “- A quote from Peter Griffin in a song on Family Guy.
OFFENSIVE! White people assume what is offensive and come up with even more offensive material for the media. South Park had a mock commercial about Cherokee Hair tampons, voice narrators are Cheech Marin & Ed Chong.
“We’re not really Native Americans or Indians, men. We’re more like Chicanos. or Mexicans.” – Cheech & Chong in papier-mache form on a South Park episode about quack new age “all natural” alternative medicine shops. +
Thanks for advertising your homes, spambot. Utah can be cold, snowy and zero degrees (fahreinheit). Does it make you wanna live in Florida or Arizona? White people do. If you wanna live in Utah or anywhere north or east, you’re not white! It’s true, ask any demographer or historian on the migratory movements of black Americans. +
…And Snapple, made with the best stuff on earth…they acquired the tea (rhymes with “pee”) taste. Like white wine, but comes with brand names like Earth works or Nantucket Nectars. Maybe a Nestea or Lipton brisk tea when they drive on the road. +
Why it’s “Kumbaa” time. Get in touch with the primitive. And have our black brothers sit next to us! Brilliant! Blacks! Boogies! Bucks! or what white people use to say to the black men employees in passenger trains: “Hey Buck, can you gimme a light?” +
Wal-mart? My own Mom loves to shop there for the discount price stuff. My grandparents lived in Oklahoma for 40 years and shopped there the most, while the first wal-marts came in Cal. my Mom was excited to see one in La Quinta, Cal. She’s not a white trash person, but an “okie” and anyone with family in Oklahoma may understand where I’m getting at. +
I thought American education under the iron-fisted, jack-booted thu liberals teach kids now on the evils of racism, conservatism, religion, capitalism, conformity and “reality”. How come 70% of Americans don’t believe in evolution (or are creationists), 65% can’t find their country on the wall map, 58% can’t do an algebra equation correctly and 40% can’t read beyond 2nd grade? More students can identify a terrible role model like Paris Hilton but can’t name the US vice president (answer: Joe Biden!) and only the “smart” kids end up admiring Adolf Hitler out of teenage rebellion or the fanatical P-C ness they started to hate by 7th grade. +
Can we invite president Barak Obama to be a “token” in the next corporate office party? I dare not. I went to on-site work parties, in certain jobs known for high numbers of minority group people. It’s a major retailer (hint: orange aprons) and the CEO’s are notable white conservatives, though I think two of ’em are Jewish and one is Italian. +
Blame commercialism for the 30 straight days of Christmas, and 10 post-Christmas days, I call it the “40 days of X-mas ad nauseum hype for the $ not the “t”). White people are becoming neo-pagan or you won’t have Target’s window posters read “Happy winter solstice”. K-mart (kosher) has the “Chanukah” stuff and Wal-mart has spanish language banners “Feliz Navidad” translated to “Merry Christmas”. All the 3 stores have black people on the posters say “Happy Kwanzaa”, I thought “was there a denial of service here lately?” like Denny’s post-1990’s obsessive pledge of diversity. +
Done deal, right after Jan. 20= Martin Luther King jr. Day, Jan. 21= Obama became president day and Jan. 22 = Black history month starts abit early, time for a week long sale. Every day, week or month is dedicated to black people now. +
Men and women in office parties don’t mix? Another quote from Peter Griffin, Family guy.
“I love to tell jokes” said Peter, a young female co-worker enters “Did somebody say jokes? I love jokes.” she said.
“Why do women have boobs…because us men want some thing good to look at, heh heh heh”. Peter made the woman’s eyes open, mouth drop and pause in morbid fear. NEVER do that, same goes to women saying men jokes too like “they all eat off the floor” or “they all don’t have feelings” nonsense.+
“The office new year’s party dedicate this year 2009 – the year of the woman” because…um, well because, they look good naked or as office dressing or interns willing to sleep with the boss? At least we know bros before hos. We like black people. No gays…and No Jews. Ok thanx bai.” +
It depends on being what kind of Irish to be ethnic enough. Scotch-Irish? Not really. Irish Catholic? Sort of, have their own church to go to. And Plastic Paddies? They’re chased out of the St. Patrick’s day parade. There’s a difference, I;m not part Irish but Scottish and the two share one thing in common: Not liking the English…and “Welsh not”. +
Huck Finn will be burned at the bonfires along with J.D. Salinger’s “Catcher in the Rye” and Harry Potter books, these crazy wacky white suburban overprotective parents. At least, kids are READING and not WATCHING TV. +
Mixed people, will unfortunately be a conservation piece in an office party. Might as well be banned from attending them. Who wants a “13th guest” to spoil the fun? I don’t wanna be a party-pooper, but why is the office party held in let’s say a private country club who won’t allow (your group here) to set foot on the grounds? No thank you. +
True. I have autism and certain close associates know this, such as my employers. Some co-workers still hadn’t learn what it is about mental disabilities. I recommend that the workplace offer some sensitivity training on the subject.
I wonder how a gay or lesbian feels about office parties, where sexual orientation is one of the “don’t ask, don’t tell or don’t come out” environments. This is why gay bars exist in a place with “atmosphere”, a world where they can be gay, and comfortably meet others like themselves.
Or a pregnant woman who may get negative attention for overeating or avoiding the punch (in case it’s spiked by booze)…and everyone “avoids her” but uses her for special treatment purposes against “sexism” at work. I heard the worst treatment came from fellow female co-workers. +
Not only driven by atheism, but also by racism and classism. The idea of “rich Jews” or “poor Gypsies”, as well the idea of German nationalism or Soviet nationalism threatened the lives of millions for being of another race or nationality. Not the reason why to prohibit Christmas at the workplace and the nickname “winter Holiday” was meant to be inclusive of other events in the “most wonderful time of the year”. +
think i need to have one of these. it will be diy only (yea puffy paint!) and it will be sick
this site is hilarious n so true. its so awesome to have some crap bout white ppl written. im sick of it always being about african americans. lol white ppl also like cheese lmfao got that one from boondocks
I had an ugly sweater-themed birthday party. It was a hit. I made all my guests wear ugly sweaters except for me.
I’m starting to feel bad, is this site from personal experience or research because you seem to know more about white ppl than I do and I’m white.
I wrote about draping sweaters over their shoulders at http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com which is the only way to overcome the ugly bunny sweater that grandma knit for you last christmas. You have to wear it but you don’t have to show it off!
aww do one on cinco de mayo!!! expose one of their biggest ignorant perceptions of other cultures’ history.
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Hello everybody, I am the asshole using enigmas name to type ignorant nonsense. I know I am a dumbass, but I can’t help myself. If you happen to see enigmas name talking garbage, just disregard it. I am a dumbass, needle dick bitch with no life using other peoples name in vain. I apologize to all.
hehehe once again lol at this, i love this site, it reminds me of how white i really am. Here in NZ us white teens had hundreds of ugly sweater parties over the years, at any time of year, these are called David Bain parties, google him, he has the BEST sweaters. with the court case being revisisted this year it meant that we got to have more parties!!
“Being ever vigilant in pointing out how dumb/rascist people must automatically be one of those Eeeevvviillll Southerners.”
Oh yeah, like a person using the words “towelhead” and “ain’t” being a Southerner is a real stretch. C’mon. I’d put money on it.
I love a cold bottle of cat urine in the morning myself.
why do I use so many names? I wanted to keep my beloved Micheal D. name untouched, but those nigras got to me.
Yoink
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Y-0-I-N-K!
This is the ugliest sweater I’ve ever seen… http://makefunofmyfriends.com/wtf-friends/timmy-so-help-me-god-you-better-smile-and-say-cheese-nana-spent-alot-of-time-making-that-sweater-and-we-are-sending-her-a-photo-to-share-with-the-ladies-at-the-senior-center/
Just read another riotous parody of Stuff White People Like at FreedomHaters.org.
Their SWL entries include: Sickle Cell Anemia, A Thesaurus, and the IFC sketch group The Whitest Kids U Know. Had me in stitches!
I recommend checking it here:
http://www.freedomhaters.org/content/once-again-yet-another-salute-stuff-white-people
we actually call them ‘cosby sweater christmas parties’
oh the irony..
This is so funny yet,i love this site. I don’t know why people say that sweater like these are ugly. They are fricken awesome 🙂
So is the word fricken.
holy crap that’s hilarious, we had an ugly sweater party last year and it was a fricken BLAST. My friends and I bought a bunch of ugly sweaters from http://www.baadsheep.com and went out on the town, people loved it!
im white but not that white haha
My school has an Ugly Sweater Day every Thursday that was the brainchild of our mostly Asian ASB.
SO THERE!
Cool white kids don’t order their sweaters online and pay $35+SH to be impostors. They go to thrift stores and pay like $5 for real vintage ones that their great-grandparents would have worn. DUH!
its just a douchebag site. Its a site by the same people this site makes fun of.
This is too true, I just got invited to a party where we are required to wear ugly sweaters while watching Home Alone.
Man Black people are so cynical.
Big fan, love this site!
Another great site to check out is http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
One rule to ruin a sweater party: “oh, I bought this at the Goodwill thrift shop”. Let’s see how your co-workers react. Wake up, it’s 2009, the whole economy is nearly dead and everyone no matter how much money you got…are cheap.
go check out http://jusjivin.com it is hilarious, you will get a black perspective
note the black guy in the picture…?
I received the annual invite to an ugly sweater party yesterday! It is at a different place every year but every year it rears its ugly, knitted face! I think every race and economic demographic has their own version of this. Inspired by the ugly sweater invite, I wrote about an upper crust holiday tradition for http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com
Too funny, so predictable! I can already see the face of the dude pointing at the ugly sweatre to avert social awkwarness…genius!
Come to the party man, be multi cultural!
Could be worse, it could be Christmas music by Bright Eyes. That would be one depressing party.
I love this site, but also check out http://jusjivin.com
Ugly Sweater for Black People
http://cgi.ebay.com/BLACK-SANTA-brand-new-Ugly-Christmas-Sweater_W0QQitemZ160386567893QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUS_CSA_WC_Sweaters?hash=item2557c8ced5
you mean that this is an ugly sweater of your momma, right?
Very creative.
omg.. im white and i definitely had an “ugly christmas sweater” part this year! it was very funny to all us white people i don’t know why! this book is so right on and hilarios
wow! i’m a white person, and i definitely had an “ugly Christmas sweater themed party” this year and yes to all of us white folks, it was very funny and ironic! why this is, i have no idea! its scary how true most of this stuff is!
Sooooo true! But I do see a black dude in the picture so black people must like these parties too.
Yea but he is an Uncle Tom so he doesn’t count, real black people don’t hang with whites.
Um, I hate to burst your bubble but this is only hipsters. The rest of us still have some self respect and taste.
Love it!
I’d also suggest taking a look at http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Looks like Title VII has even effected our beloved ugly sweater parties
I believe ‘Festives’ parties are also acceptable. You have the non-denominational side of it. You also get to tell you other white friends “how they have disappointed you this year”(Ironically of coarse, white people must tread carefully). You also get to reflect on a time when you could love Seinfeld and not be racist for liking Kramer.
Sorry but stupid preppy/ popular kids I went to High School with also have Ugly Sweater Party’s. I have evidence VIA Facebook.
lolz way to go with not stereotyping(im being sarcastic) and why do poeple need to stuff every one into pre-labled boxes based on their friends or lifestyle?what your saying is black poeple cant mix with whites because if they do they are called bad names and considered an outcast,if you think about it its realy ironic.for a black guy you sure are racially predijuced
I had one too. Surprisingly there were 3 and a half black guys there. The racial diversity was simply delightful.
real whites don’t hang with blacks..
Quite the pants pisser!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
You’re right, us white people do enjoy us some Ugly Sweater parties… so much so that we’ve developed a website dedicated to it.
You’re right, us white people do enjoy us some Ugly Sweater parties… so much so that we’ve developed a website dedicated to it. (Click the name to check it out!)
Chuckle. Chuckle. Chuckle.
Here’s another laugh: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
can’t understand this one white folks
id never heard of them until i read this. what a strange concept!
I’ll admit, I’ve been to one or two of these. I keep the sweaters too.
LOL so I was looking at the list of stuff this afternoon, and looking at all the ones that applied to me. And as I was looking through, I saw Ugly Sweater Parties, and I was like, “Psh, maybe Tacky Parties for New Year’s, but I’ve like never even hear of Ugly Sweater Parties! I thought that’s what the 1980’s was for.” Then right after I finished looking at this site, I logged onto my Facebook account, and my cousin had just posted pictures of the ugly sweater party she went to last Christmas. Well then…
I’ve definitely organized an ugly Christmas sweater party. However, I disagree with the lack of the traditional Christian Christmas implements. I myself am an Atheist, but my fondest memories of Christmas involve the tree, stockings, tacky music, eggnog, cigars, bright lights and fireplaces. My family was always one to put a star on the tree as opposed to an angel though.
We call it Tacky Christmas party. Sweaters keeps it light. Boozing encouraged. Right on.
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My ex once curated an Ugly Sweater art show. Why are you guys so fascinated by kitsch?
?
Haha, my friends and I are planning a kwanzaa party this year.
Sweater Party!
umm…Sweater Party!
Why do you say it’s a thing white people like when you show a black guy in the accompanying photo. I know the site is meant to be humorous and all, but this kind of makes it a bit redundant and meaningless. Maybe you should just call it “things people like”
Perhaps you should go and look up what “redundant” means.
Again, SWPL fails to disappoint–just what I was looking for…and now I find myself educated as to why these mysteries my friends go to take place!
Uh, Ben, that dude may have just gone b/c his white friends invited him. Doesn’t mean he’s totally feeling the ugly sweater aspect. But maybe he does, maybe he does. I just know that I, for one, have partaken of plenty of mystifying white cultural things simply b/c I want to hang out with my friends even if I don’t get why embarrassing sweaters are so hilarious as to deserve such celebration. I think the one time I actually agreed to show up at one of these I arrived only to realize that I was in the wrong costume. I didn’t realize I was supposed to spend valuable time and money dredging up the worst possible 80s vintage kitschy Santaesque item that I’d only wear once, so I found some Christmas knee-highs someone gave my dad that he never wore and borrowed a wreathy-shirt from my mom someone had given her…and tried to make it all look cute. FAIL 😀
I love how this blog actually acknowledges white culture instead of thinking it’s just ‘the norm’ and knows how to laugh at itself…
p.s. There’s this consignment store I used to shop at that’s in what’s become a pretty hipster part of town. I remember when they started carrying a huge section of ugly vintage holiday sweaters, I was so mystified. I couldn’t figure out how these sweaters fit their ever-fashionable high standards. Of course, this was before I started hanging out with so many hip white ppl…
Good point, but don’t forget the Fresh Prince – Carlton’s of the world. Or as the early 90’s term would peg it. “Uncle Toms”. They’re dark white folks. 🙂
May I submit another Christmas related event for consideration: Christmas Carrol’s,
See below:
Very nice. You’re right about thrift stores not having anything good… I only found hideous sweaters that smelled like old ladies lol. Maybe one year, you’ll come to an ugly sweater party, glad I could inspire some thoughts.
The Ultimate Ugly Christmas Sweater! Now available.
I hope they didn’t make the upper-level roof collapse! The Galleria near Sacramento had alot of holiday jeer!
HAPPY HOLIDAYS but NO MERRY CHRISTMAS that’s not PC.
LOL I saw this blog on http://www.DanielDickey.com (The MTV VJ) and I must say, it’s just as funny!!
This is funny, who’s the comedian?
I AUGHTA BEAT YOUR FUCKIN ASS
i love ugly sweater parties. who doesn’t? it’s a night to honor our grandmothers and those designers who failed to consult the sweater gods.
White people, well all people, also enjoy http://www.NakedHipster.com. Mainly because the girls are hot and don’t have clothes on. Usually those two things go well together. You know, the hotness and the nakedness.
Burl Ives Rocks!! As a White Dude I can listen to Burl Ives Christmas music year round.
Sweater Parties are always interesting, but I find it that their are occasionally some African Americans there, but only one or two. Is this a weird type of party or can we actually make this into a national holiday…Ugly Sweater Day?! Here at Penn State, I have only been to ONE ugly sweater party and I didn’t even wear a sweater. I guess not all white people like this, but I sure do like to party
Ugly sweater parties are lots of fun. I don’t see it as a white stereotype because it’s not just whites that attend or host the party. Lots of nationalities love ugly sweater parties. I don’t think it has anything to do with a scape goat to religion either. It’s just a themed holiday party. Even religious groups have ugly sweater parties.
I’ve never heard of this before and I don’t own any ugly sweaters.
If you don’t think any of your sweaters are ugly, then in reality most of them are.
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I work at Buffalo Exchange and these sweaters are like gold. We make more money of these than anything else we sell.
I found some great ugly sweaters at BaadsheepUglySweaters.com. They were pretty cheap since there’s not many place still in stock in LA.
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BaadSheep is ready to rock for this ugly season. Check them out!
a
Yeah, these sweaters are really fugly. Unlike the kind worn by Bill Cosby on TV lol
I was just invited to one of these parties by a female black sorority. I was told I’d be the only white guy there…
Burberry Schal sind als modisches Accessoire einfach ein Muss
CBC just had a news item about ugly sweater parties.You don’t get much whiter than that.
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Umm There’s a black person in the pic, which hey that’s cool but doesn’t that kinda contradict the whole theme here? lol
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/21/14-having-black-friends/
I wrote a post about Ugly Christmas Sweaters here -> http://hipsterapproved.wordpress.com/2012/12/05/hip-book-review-rock-your-ugly-christmas-sweater/
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I’m white and had no idea what an ugly sweater party was till I read this and I have to say this is funny but a bit offending way to pull in the race card!
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I dare you to have a “Cosby Party” these days.