Though very specific to white people who were going through an awkward phase in 1995 (basically anyone between eleven and forty), My So-Called Life’s resonance cannot be overstated. Simply say the words Jordan Catalano. Say them to any white woman, gay white male, or superconfident-in-his-sexuality, irony-loving straight white male, and watch them swoon. You seriously do not even need an explanation about the show. Actually, if someone asks your name, you should say it’s Jordan Catalano and that you’ve never heard of the show. You will be the hit of the party, provided you let everyone in on the joke by the middle of the evening. Otherwise you will probably be known as a self-centered, dyslexic jerk.
The show itself was seen as revolutionary for its frank and honest dealings with same- sex relationships, drug and alcohol use among teenagers, and domestic abuse. However, the part of the show that truly bonds white people together is not their common experience of exploring these issues. No, it’s the collective sense of regret for mid-nineties fashion.
“Do you remember the episode where Rayanne had the drug overdose?”
“Sort of. Do you remember that choker necklace she wore?
What were we thinking?”
“I’ve actually had a drug prob—”
“And the scrunchies? Are you kidding me?”
So rather than attempting to use the social aspect of the show to forge a deep connection with white people, you should simply revert to the number-one rule when dealing with white people: throw a themed party.
As a male, if you arrive with a white T-shirt, ripped jeans, and a plaid shirt tied around your waist you should be guaranteed, at the very least, a make-out session. As a female, show up with a plaid skirt, combat boots, and your hair parted down the middle. Though this outfit would normally get you branded as a lesbian, tonight it will have quite the opposite effect.
Note: You may notice that all the music from this era is very depressing. Do not worry about it having a negative effect on your party. White people have an amazing ability to get drunk and then all happily sing, in unison, a song about suicide.
Whiter Shades of Pale: The Stuff White People Like, Coast to Coast from Seattle’s Sweaters to Maine’s Microbrews, coming 11/23!
Stuff White People Like 
Hands down, the best post ever written.
Sheer brilliance.
I’d like to add that I totally had Angela’s A-line bob and wore doc martens. Ha ha ha. My poor parents.
I’m beginning to worry that I like almost every one of the things on the list. Oh, well, at least I can take comfort in the subversiveness of being Black and liking them. Wait–is loving subversiveness on the list?
Ditto. And then I met Claire Danes in a French class in college and it was super awkward, having once pretended to be her.
that is so true. my white husband, white friends and i always sing along to morrissey songs. singing along drunk and happy to those depressing effing songs.
Oh Pul-eze… what we wore in the 90’s was SO much better than what we wore in the eighties. Oh wait…crap. The kids nowadays are wearing the same crap we wore in the 80’s. Sick. Sick. Sick. But I miss my combat boots and flannels. And I lived in Seattle. I miss that too. Sigh.
I would love to see doc martens make a come back…or even better, I could just where them to, you know, be ironic.
Um, had the A-line bob and combat boots? Try still have. Yep, you guessed it, I’m a 29 year old English Lit grad student, going on my 11th year in college. Looking forward to getting into that M.F.A. next year. If the show taught you anything, folks, it’s that we’re going nowhere fast- but in style.
P.S. the key to hipsterdom is to just keep yer look and wait for everyone else to catch up.
Alli K where have you been? doc marens have already made a comback.. every moderately trendy teenage girl is wearing them…
Lol. I’ve been working on my J.D. in Law, and on starting a non-profit for disadvantaged women. All whilst participating on the faculty’s co-ed soccer team…I guess I’ve fallen behind on white people fashion… although I do have quite a bit of outdoor performance gear.
I sat on my bed and watched a MSCL marathon one weekend…the whole weekend. By mid-week my sister had made and sent me a shirt that said, “Jordan Catalano is my hero.” I still have it, and occasionally wear it.
As someone who was, herself, a tortured, angst-ridden combat-booted teenage girl during My So-Called Life’s heyday, I’m thrilled at the current flannel/doc marten/ripped jeans comeback. It’s been hard but I’ve stuck in there and WHAM whaddaya know? I’m fashionable again. Woot.
Wierd that the author chose to emphasize our interest in retro-fashion over our modern willingness to casually share intimate details about our past in order to become the center of attention. It seems as if he was opting for the comedic effect rather than the (probably) more realisitic (and more sadly comedic in the abstract) conversation that would probably have occurred.
This is one of the best posts you’ve written here, gotta admit, white people always sing this while drunk, we do it all the time…
I think I’m in love with Christian Lander. Of course I could be his grandfather but I love him anyway. What a great blog.
All of this and no picture of Jordan Catalano?! Sigh. I will now have to Google Image Jared Leto (the early days).
never heard of this show
LOL I saw this blog on http://www.DanielDickey.com and love it just as much!
Aw, *screw* that conceited, dopey Jordan Catalanado…. Brian Krakow was the MAN! Loved his white-guy afro and his desperate awkwardness. He should’ve gotten the girl, but she was too damn shallow for him.
Haha… choker necklaces. Indeed, wtf were those kids thinking.
Dibs…I’m post #20. I’m familiar of the movie but never got the name right. I worry about my whiteness is running low, time to re-check my income level and recharge to ensure: I’m white, trendy, have class, stocks, inheritance, a degree and a false sense of belief in superiority but I’m not racist.
stuff white people like has been stretched to the limit and now, for the first time that I recall, Lander is using the trope of the meritocratic narcissist: the word is “basically.”
I cringe when I hear this from over-educated but under informed or more probably lazy thinkers who demean and condescend to the listener.
This blog has become static and is now using all the language of that which has been hypocritical among white people and has gone into reverse.
The word “essentially” follows in all these criticisms. I can no longer recommend stuffwhitepeoplelike.com
Yeah, adverbs are mighty white indeed…
Brilliant! I think the best bit is “condescend to”, but there’s so much to choose from.
Basically, I can continue to recommend this comment.
I can still recommend stuffwhitepeoplelike.com its always funny, however there is a site with better offers out there with more variety, including ipads.
http://www.funnyboneworld.com/contests
When you get really drunk, we stop seeing the difference between songs about suicide and songs about love: they sound equally good to sing along with.
It only ran for one season, 19 episodes according to imdb. No one even remembers it was on TV.
Actually I do, I was finishing college, my wife just had a baby and I was working my ass off trying to figure out how to support them. I hated it, just wasn’t in the mood to hear about a whiny teenager and her “problems”.
Your company came across my desk as one that potentially might be interested in our domain name ProFootball.co.
I didnt want to bother calling so I figured I would send a message through your website contact form.
This name could really be a great name to get SEO and web traffic from and could be developed into a strong brand for anything Pro Football related. We think this could especially be true internationally where people are already highly familiar with using “.co” and “Pro Football” could represent not only american football but soccer and rugby as well.
If this name is of interest to you, don’t wait until the NFL decides to go international. Make a move now and we will accept any reasonable offer. Feel free to email me back or fill out the Purchase Inquiry on the parking page at: http://www.profootball.co/for-sale.cfm
Thanks,
Todd
Then don’t read it and stop commenting on it. Move on. Each to their own silly. I LOVE this blog. It cracks me up… and the comments used to crack me up, but now I’m just annoyed with them and wish the haters would move on and let the rest of us enjoy.
im with Lou! and who is Daniel Dickey? New blogs I love besides this one: http://www.seriouslysorry.com , haha
@chris, jared leto sucks. @rachel – i think its http://www.SRSLYSORRY.com, and yeah, its pretty flipping amazing
I hate you.
I hate this blog.
I hate Lou.
“Though this outfit would normally get you branded as a lesbian, tonight it will have quite the opposite effect.”
This kind of stuff is the reason I read this blog
Why are you skipping Boston on the “Whiter Shades of Pale” book tour? If it weren’t for Williamsburg, the entire Boston area (aside from a few “wrong kind of white” and “wrong kind of diverse” communities north of the city) would be the whiteness capital of the East Coast!
Dave, Boston is a commie pinko shit hole. The old Goldwater ad, had it right when Barry sawed off the eastern seaboard and let it drift away from the rest of America as it already has. Happy thanksgiving to all you liberal left wing douchebags.
“Dave, Boston is a commie pinko shit hole.”
And by your judgement, the rest of the white hot-spots (Portland, hip parts of Brooklyn, etc.) are NOT??
Praise the Lord, send money.
@ jared and @rachel – did you see the thanksgiving posts! hahah http://seriouslysorry.com/apology/1538
ooooo, sorry native americans!
Dear Dave,
They are called Massholes for a reason.
There aren’t really that many Massholes here anymore, because the white people have driven them all out!
Yo, what about Saved By The Bell? I refuse to admit that there is a single white person alive who hasn’t ever seen and loved Saved By The Bell. Best show ever.
Good luck with your book launch.
crimesofthetimes.blogspot.com
stuff urban middle class white people like. Not to be confused with “You might be a redneck if…”
Somehow one feels like more of a handjob…
You clearly haven’t seen the latest Urban Outfitters Catalog.
Speaking of Nineties memories, I remember when my best guy-friend made fun of me for buying torn up overalls at Urban Outfitters for $40 because it was so much money. My real crime, of course, was not shoplifting them (which I later got arrested for).
Emily is a typical white person, a thieving cunt.
Well the latest Stuff White People Like book has been released and the traffic on this site hasn’t increased. I think it’s fair to say that the Stuff White People Like bubble has burst.
Even if they don’t, the ones that hate it like it “ironically.”
This site should be “Stuff Hipsters Like”. How is a blog ripping on white people that is targeted to white people not have any “launch parties” in the south? Austin doesn’t count because it’s a hipster city and thats the demo they’re going for. Ripping on your own subculture is so hipster.
No Washington, D.C.? We like to read things other than bills and congressional reports…………
Come on, come to D.C.!
http://mothersofbrothersblog.blogspot.com
MOV
white people are two faced scumers, most of them are on drugs and are fucking douchebags.
I hate when people suicide songs as a social lube. “Jumper” frikkin spoke to me in high school. Now your using it to make eyes with the half-drunk yuppie chick?
I want to punch you so f’in bad. (Will that ruin or help my chances with her?)
dang Jerry, you must be a little hipster yourself to notice. Haha, speaking of hipsters: http://www.seriouslysorry.com
Totally agree with this. I love that show, as do many of my friends… come to think of it, these friends are all white.
It IS a great show though, and not just because of the fashion. Hello, when Ricky was homeless and ran into Angela’s mom at the church on Christmas!? 🙂
Oh Jordan Catalano! He made me swoon.
http://winewillfixit.blogspot.com/
Through the centuries of colonization and the unruly cultural imperialism of not only Canada and the US, but dozens of other countries in the world, I would think that white people would be content. But of course not..
What a wonderful way to perpetuate the customs and values of the over-privileged white man.
Lovely.
Another thing that White People Like is complaining about sequel books/movies. It suffers from sequelitis. Look at the one star review on Amazon for “Whiter Shades of Pale.”
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If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. There is no God. White people are not the superior race. Asians are intellectually superior to whites. Blacks are physically superior to whites. Whites are just in the middle. So that just makes white people plain fucking ordinary and racist.
Most folks are already fed up with racist blacks accusing whites of being racist; usually takes one to know one! I am all for WET (White Entertainment TV), NAAWP (National Association for the Advancement of White People), United White Student College Fund, etc. Most of us are tired of giving up our rights to a thankless bunch of cry babies who want more and accuse us of not doing enough.
Blacks want integration, but still want to be segregated, pompous, greedy, and above the same rules that white people abide by. Blacks want to destroy things that white people enjoy and get away with it. Well….ENOUGH!!!
So go back to your big screen TV and wait for your next entitlement check to arrive. All you seem to want to do is get beligerant when someone is having a good time in a light hearted manner.
yep,white is a color stand for pure,and its easy to match your clothes,but actually i like yellow,like sun,its warm
You gimmie dope
The guy in the photo is Rudi the hamster shoving fag, just strolling along in the woods, with a hamster nipping in his asshole.
This blog is disgusting. Thank god the congoloids can’t read or they’d be yukking it up.
Wait, who? I must have fallen asleep under that rock.
WOW
fuck you motherfucking
having hamster problems? Let me know, I will teach you the joys of proper hamster insertion. You can call me rudi
What sick shit. Shoving hamsters? What the fuck.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. Keebler elves are creepy. There is no Jolly Green Giant. Most white people are really just two Hispanic midgets stacked on top of each other. Asians can maintain an erection for more than four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Blacks think Tyler Perry is funny. Blake Edwards was nothing without Peter Sellers. Whites are in the hamper, and need bleach to be fully cleaned. Talib Kweli was a black man who pooped Italian style. So that just makes me feel silly.
That is freaking awesome, keep this blog going man. I really enjoy reading your stuff.
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fuck you motherfucker
you sound like you’d be an utter delight to be around.
Yeah I live in a fucking scum trailer park, my daughter is a junkie whore, I have not had a shower in a month, and I am a chain smoker, and smell like shit.
El you smell, what the fuck buddy, take a bath.
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Barf.Caucasian self-loathing.Terrible terrible unattractive.Shit if all i wanted to do is sit around watching and listening to hard luck storys i would have stayed in the ghetto..:)
stay in the trailer park with the el.
There are a multitude of reasons why I adore Natalie. Below I list but several:
1. As she stated in her 2011 Oscars award speech, she is a child sensation. I am also a child sensation, having been deemed a “jazz prodigy” at the tender age of 11. At the same age Natalie gained a role in the (in my opinion, rather mediocre) movie entitled Leon.
2. She is a Jewish American like I am.
3. Though perhaps not as beautiful as me, she is rather attractive
4. She attended a prestigious educational institution which means she is of the same fine breeding as myself, that is to say, we are both intellectuals who are on the same level. Though I merely attended a second-tier institution entitled Smolny College – it was in St Petersburg Russia, and may I remind you that I was the first fully marticulated American student studying there. Suffice to say, that is an amazing accomplishment in itself. Though I cannot drop into casual conversation that Harvard was my alma mater, I am highly gifted at speaking Russian as my 2nd language. Therefore, I believe the two of us are kindred souls in this regard. Meredith Deaton – an exLivejournal friend – attended NYU, but everyone knows they offer nothing but a non Ivy League second-tier education for a ridiculously expensive amount of dinero. Institutes that I have attended, such as UMass, Bard College, Smolny and the University of Arizona, though perhaps less prestigious, are FINE institutes…I swear.
5. Natalie lost 20lbs for her role in Black Swan. I consider this a remarkable achievement, and personally my aim is to lose the majority of the flab around my stomach sooner or later.
6. I am highly interested in film and film-making. Though music was my consumate passion for the first half of my years, and I am highly skilled at creative writing (which you can discover by “googling” me: Ania A Shapiro, or Aimee Rae Friedland will do), I do have an inkling sensation that film is where my true talent lies. I dream of co-producing an Academy Award winning screenplay with my literary hero David Sedaris. Hopefully Natalie will be my heroine – though I may need to hurry along with my ambitions before she gets too aged.
7. Her spouse is French. The language was a passion of mine, though juvenile, it was a worthy interest for a pubescent teen as I was at the time. In fact, it was on a trip to Paris that I discovered, ironically, my passion for Russian and everything Russian. What a feat to win the heart of such a talented, artistic, stereotypical French man like Natalie has. Though, as I am bisexual, perhaps a French woman would be quite as desirable in my regard.
8. What a coincidence! She and I have both changed our names. Like Natalie, my birth name is not the same name by which I am well known and celebrated. I was born Aimee Rae Friedland, and she, Natalie Hershlag.
9. I do not wish to continue associating with middle class bores. An ex-Livejournal friend of mine, Meredith Deaton, believes she is some sort of internet celebrity because she has oh, 100 or so followers on some online journal. And she is pretentiously proud of her mediocre “accomplishments” – such as, what exactly, traveling to a few countries and attending NYU? Living in Tokyo for 2 years? I laugh in the face of such a typical suburban mindset that believes such petty yuppie goals are actually “accomplishments.” I dream of exceeding all boundaries, excelling beyond my suburban upbringing in Tucson, and residing in pent-houses of the rich and famous. I desire to be truly admired by celebrated people whose opinions count. Natalie has these qualities and I strive to attain them for myself. I wish to move beyond the boundaries of mere internet followers and become a global sensation, standing up there accepting an Academy Award for Best Director in my beautiful gown. Where is Meredith Deaton now – teaching at some local high school in her hometown of Tulsa, Oklahoma? A far cry from Soho or Monte Carlo.
10. Natalie has a refined sense of style, which I possess as well. While lesser humans are content to wear shit Target attire, I clothe myself in haute couture.
What an ass-eating fag in the photo above, total homo sicko perv.
hey i like your book. its very uhhhh… white i guess you could say and i like men.. that are white… kinda like vanilla ice cream, or lotion maybe? or like some sort white wall that wierd people stare at all the time…kinda like how some people sit and read this gay book!
I was home at the trailer park when this stupid yuppie scumbag yells to me ” do they have showers in the trailers?” He threw a bar of soap at me and sped off. I am starting a blog, life of a trailer park hero!
but but.. I LOVE mid-ninety’s fashion! How DARE you!!!! I still have my combat boots and my leather too. I can’t comment on the show though, because I didn’t have a tv – did you forget about #28?
MSCL is currently 2 episodes in on Sundance Channel.
i love the way he leans
can’t the C.Lander dude go further back, like to the 80’s before all this grunge/emo/sulking dudes with bi-polar/cobain-ish/suicidal/ironic/self-cutting/meth/lame knit hats/red-bull/rock-star-disgusting energy drinks/whiny alternative
songs/parents-hate-me-so-depressed/fake-logger-flannel-shirt-wearing hipsters/20-yr-olds- that-smoke-tobacco-pipes-and-wear fisherman’s hats/pea coats= never got past drama club dress-up-high-school/using verbs to describe themselves like ‘questioning’ instead of Question Authority.
Eff all that shyt, Save Ferris !
A proponent of Yuppie Scum…..
Lol, I am black, I grew up in the city, and I will say that EVERYONE that DIDN’T obsess over DEGRASSI during that time watched MSCL…lol..
Please, everyone watched this show. I LOVED this show so much….I still watch the oxygen replays.
Interesting reading & perspective. Keep up the controversy. 🙂
:):):):)i agree
I despised Saved by the Bell.
An excellent post, providing something good to read,it’s just good to came across the post on hand sets and its features.
I definitely had my share of scrunchies..lol
I sure had my share of scrunchies..Lol.
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What a weirdo in the photo, makes me wanna fucking puke, is that the fag, gregalicious? No he is a tranny, named fanny.
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What up! I simply want to give a huge thumbs up for the nice info you might have here on this post. I will likely be coming again to your blog for more soon.
You’re blog remined me many memories of childhood. Hope someday I can share my experience with you.
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you said very good,thanks
I heat Jordan!! And this post def gave me a chick girl chuckle!! hahaha
Love the Blog!
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mels is a shit hole trailer park, full of smelly scumbags. Its worth the trip, a few drinks then over to mels and you will laugh your ass off. You have heard of slumming, well this is more like scumming, unwashed white scum in all its glory. Visit Mels urinate on a trailer park dweller its cool.
This was great while it lasted. White people love McSweeney’s. Has Lander ever written for McSweeney’s? I’d try to get a gig editing that site if I were him. The tone is a perfect match. Contact Christopher Monks and make friends. And I’m being perfectly serious, here.
fu man
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Rofl is this seriously as bad as it gets as far as problems go for white people?
Styles are the Office 2010 most powerful tool in a Microsoft Office 2010 Word Processor to simplify formatting
Here is another book that should be listed on your site of “Stuff White People Like” Thanks! Richard Peacock (Author of Symbols of Love). Available now in the Apple iBookstore.
http://itunes.apple.com/us/book/symbols-of-love/id498988026?mt=11
I second symbolsofloves idea.
i like that book.
I have half a shit hanging out of my asshole right now, thought I would share, white people like to share.
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Yeah, change the title to Stuff Self-Loathing Urban Hipster Douchebags Like. Then you’re on to something.
…just for fun
Loved the show My So-Called Life, and you covered it in a brilliant and hilarious way!
SEM追求获的最大来自搜索引擎的访问量
1，seo公司标题是一个网站排名优化的核心，一个好的标题能起到事半功倍的作用，所以首先要研究对手网站的标题怎么写的，有没关键字堆积，出现了几次，标题是一句话，还是一个个关键字罗列。 2，网站的内容，一个标题和内容完全没有相关的网站是作弊的，也不会有很好的排名的，特别是现在搜索引擎已经非常聪明了，所以要看网站整体内容和标题的关联度。 3，网站的标签代码，好的SEOER对网站代码标签会非常合理的实用，对h1，h2，h3，strong，b的使用，这些标签使用的次数，使用的位置，使用在什么词上面，这都是关键。 4，网站是不是用站点地图，包括对用户的，以及对搜索引擎的百度的新闻协议，google的sitemap使用情况。 5，网站页面代码质量，网站是不是谷歌优化做到，DIV+CSS，是不是JS用到外部调用，网页内是不是有大量的样式属性。 6，网站头部的META标签实用情况，主要是指网站的keywords和description有没有，以及写的质量如何。 7，网站的快照情况，网站域名在百度和google等搜索引擎site后，出现的首页包括内页快照情况，是不是很久以前的。 8，网站站内容质量及更新，打开对手的网站查看内容更新的情况，是不是一直保持更新的，并且都是大量高质量的内容。 9，友情链接的网站，网站交换链接的网站主要是那些，是不是行业相关性的网站，是不是是高PR的，快照新的网站。 10，有没假如开放式目录或著名的网址导航站，如果有加入一些好的网址导航站，并且加入一些目录，那么网站的影响力就比较高。 11，网站域名的年限以及服务器的综合性能状况，包括响应速度，IP段，网站的宽带情况。 12，网站的程序，是不是生成静态页面的，并且地址很简洁，目录是不是很深的。 13，网站内部的优化情况如何，有没有出现关键字就连接到相应地址的，有没有相关信息，面包屑导航等 14，网站图片是不是都有alt属性值，并且是不是都是一样的内容，是否简明。 seo推广 15，网站有没有相关的统计程序代码用来对网站进行分析的。 16，网站的导航是不是使用FLASH导航或者图片JS导航的。 1，网站标题、描述优化 网站标题、描述是网站优化的核心因素，优化了网站标题、描述并不代表关键词就能获得一个不错的排名，但是不优化网站标题和网站描述一定不能有一个很好的位置。搜索引擎对网站标题字符是有一定的要求的，对标题要求是中文字符应当限制在30个字符以内。英文字符应当控制在60个字节。在设置的时候不要有堆积现象。描述的要求在150个字符以内，也不能有关键词堆积现象。 2、网站关键词布置; 网站关键词布置实施的第一步应当先查询关键词密度，分析现在网站关键词的分布情况是否符合搜索引擎对网站关键词的要求。搜索引擎对网站关键词密度要求在2%到8%是最合适的。超过了这个指数可能要进行删减，低于这个数字要进行增加关键词。增加关键词应当顺从自然、合理的原则。 3，内页与首页的链接处理; 内页与首页的链接处理是说设计到关键词或者相关文本的指向链接，一般情况下，内页出现关键词的情况下应当指向首页的链接，但是每页出现的相同关键词只能做一个指向链接。多余的可以设置本页地址链接，内页应当放长尾关键词，增加网站流量。 4，网站图片优化; 有的人为了增加网站的美观性，使用了很多图片，图片既然已经用了，那么优化网站图片就成了优化师操作的一部分了。我个人优化图片除了增加图片的ALT命名属性之外，还会对图片进行切割，也就是把图片分割成不同程度的方块，组成一个标准的图片，可以增加图片的打开速度，以至于不影响网站的读取，又能够让搜索引擎独到图片的内容。 5，文本命名优化; 文本优化可能会被很多人忽略，其实它的权重是非常高的。文本命名的合理与否，直接导致搜索引擎能不能正常读取网页的信息。文本命名是直接影响到网站的二级域名的地址，文本命名应当标准化，更不能出现中文命名。比如SEO/SEM团队网站是做搜索引擎优化(SEM)的，那么，在明明SEO这个文本的时候，就不能单独的写个SEO，要网站seo想效果更好的，就要写全称，比如，search engine optimizition这样才是比较合理的命名。 6，网站友情链接处理; 友情链接在网站优化过程中也起到非常重要的作用，现在的友情链接和初始的友情链接已经发生了改变。之前的友情链接是方便别人找到信息，而现在成了搜索引擎对网站评价质量的标准。搜索引擎对友情链接的要求是质量高、相关性与互补性强。每页的友情链接最好不要超过20个,首页不超过50。网站每页都有不同的链接是最好不过了。 7，网站结构优化; 这里说的结构优化主要是指的是路径优化，也就是页面与页面的互通性，是否有走向一个页面而没有回来的路径，这样就不是一个合理的路径，页面与页面，内页与主页的互通性，新闻页的上一篇和下一篇，返回首页，返回主页面的设置，栏目与栏目页的互通性。这些都是优化的范围之内。 8，标准的网站程序优化; 很多人可能会问到程序应当怎么样去优化,其实程序优化指的是程序应当发生变化，之前很多人没有这方面的认识，多数都是做成动态的网站，动态的网站可能是方便网站改版，但是它有一个致命的弱点，也就是不方便搜索引擎读取与收录。当然并不代表读取不了。除此以外，还要对网站之前的程序进行减肥，比如多余的地方或者程序代码中有臃肿的现象，该删除的应当及时删除。该补充的进行补充。 9，网站页面的延续性; 所谓的延续性就是网页后期的可持续性，是说建设完成之后是否一直就是这些页面，网站应当在后期不断地有新内容添加。这样才能保证搜索引擎蜘蛛更勤快的访问网站，增加网站的收录量，让网站一直保持最新状态。 10，网站向搜索引擎提交; 这个因素属于是外部优化的一部分了，向搜索引擎提交主要是为了把搜索引擎被动抓取网站变成主动抓取网站，这样可以更快的帮助搜索引擎访问网站，提交网站是起到向搜索引擎推荐或者是引荐的作用。向搜索引擎提交的时候，站长要注意，不要重复提交，搜索引擎视这种情形为作弊行为。提交完成之后需要站长耐心的等待。 11，增加外部链接; 外部链接的增加可以使向专业的论坛或者评论发表文章，我个人的做法是每天只需要发一篇高质量的网站在论坛或者是专业博客上，网址一般隐藏在关键词内部。这样又能够增加外链又不影响美观。 12，搜索引擎算法与网站后期维护; 搜索引擎算法是一个很难掌握的技术了，也是搜索引擎优化最核心的技术了，这里没办法说清楚，但是有一点就是，要想了解搜索引擎有什么变化可以根据搜索引擎的收录量、链接情况、网站友情链接和网站标题进行分析搜索引擎下一步动向谷歌推广。
做外链有许多的注意事项
seo大家都知道在网站SEO推广阶段，外链对于SEO是多么重要，因为外链可以让关键词排名得到提升。于是站长们疯狂的寻找外链，却不知道做外链时有许多的注意事项。天下生意团队提醒应注意如下事项： 一、网站直接互相交换友情链接 1、 网站之间交换友情链接是网站互相关联推荐的一种方式，链接的时候一定要注意你链接的网站是否是与你的网站内容相关，这样搜索引擎们在检索页面的时候可以对你的链接相关度增加许多权重。 2、网站PR值：网站PR值是一个网站的衡量标准，在交换友链时一定要注意这方面的问题， 切忌盯着PR值的高低忽略了PR输出值，而且对方的外链不要超过30个。 3、锚文本：锚文本可以增加相关关键词的权重度和排名度。所以在做友情链接时最好用关键词链接。这样可以提醒搜索引擎将要爬行的网站对什么样的词语比较重要。但是切忌对一个关键词在短期内做多次的友情链接交换，这样很容易导致关键词被K这方面在百度体现尤为严重，而且百度就算你用自己站名来做连接词短期内频繁做的话也会被认为人为过度优化，也会被K。 4、链接方网站的快照、收录数、域名历史也非常重要。快照要求三天之内的。收录数越多越好，而且谷歌和百度的收录数差别也不能太大。域名历史通网站优化公司过工具可以查询，这些都是体现出网站域名在搜索引擎的权重度和友好的一个力证。 5、对方网站采取的不是直接链接千万不要换，许多网站会使用js、和其他代码采用跳转的方式到你的站，这种做法是等于没给你链接，而且还会被判断为作弊，就连链接他的内页都不算，而且对于内页链接也没有多大意义。 二、外部单链 外部单链就是在单方面链接你的网站而你不链接对方，这种做法非常普遍而且搜索引擎对这方面的链接给予关注度和权重度也非常高，所以很多人才会写博客登录各种链接目录等。但是这里在登录目录的时候也要千万注意的是，千万别登录到满页都是不正当广告的页面。这样很影响网站的信誉度。所以外部链接质量度是非常重要的。 三、天下生意团队小提示 1、google seo别指向链接目录。 2、别交换没PR的内页，要做也是做单链。 3、别和拥有很多链接的站做友情，你分不到羹而且容易把自己搭进去。 4、别老是更换链接，会引起搜索引擎的怀疑。 天下生意团队提醒站长们别为了链接而链接，我们应该为了排名而作有质量的链接，这样才是长久之计。 一、何为SEO关键词边缘效应？ SEO关键词边缘效应是指一个网站或者网页在获得SEO核心或热门关键词排名以后，其他相关关键词也会出现很好的搜索排名。例如：你获得A关键词搜索排名的同时，XA，YA，ZA等相关关键词也出现很好的搜索排名，这样的现象我们称之为SEO关键词边缘效应。 二、关键词边缘效应产生的原因 原因主要在于搜索引擎的算法。在搜索引擎的算法中，把这些关键词认为是高度相关的词语，因此把这些类似结果的页面提升排名。 三、关键词边缘效应是否一直存在？ 答案是否定的。有的时候你核心的关键词排名很好，其他相关关键词也许根本找不到。这个是正常现象。举个例子：假如你的网站SEO这个词排名很好，并不会代表SEO论坛,SEO优化,SEO技术等相关关键词都会排名很好。 四、关键词边缘效应的触发机制 1、两个词的热门度存在谷歌优化一定比例的差距。 2、两个词的热门度都不会太热。 3、两个词在页面都出现过，最热门的应该多次出现。 4、页面热门词的次数和相关词的次数比例是一个合理的范围。 5、此外2个词如果存在同义且指同一事物，并且词中存在一半以上相同字和次序，也可能触发关键词边缘效应。 五、关键词边缘效应的作用 利用此原理，能够在把核心关键词做上去的同时，轻松带动多个相关关键词上线。 六、关键词边缘效应如何运用在网站上 1、首先选定你的核心关键词。 2、找出核心关键词能触发边缘效应的相关关键词。 3、合理分布这些关键词的位置和密度，以及比例。 4、适当外链，注意锚文本的比例。 最后，在收获核心关键词的同时，关键词边缘效应也就出来了google优化。
避免在优化网站中经常出现的SEO优化过度的情况
网站关键词优化一、引用权威数据 报纸杂志的很多地方会有官方数据的引用，这使得文章内容的真实可信度高。在合适的地方用显眼的文字引用权威的资料，强调一个片段，这让读者一眼就看到这篇文章的权威性，所以更有兴趣往下阅读了。 二、使用图片 往往吸引人的文章里都配有插图，这种图文并茂的文章能让读者一目了然。现在很多图书改版都制作成了图文版，这是为了获得更好的用户视觉体验，网站同样如此。虽然，SEO团队都知道，图片不利于搜索引擎索引，但用户体验大于一切，而且也有让搜索引擎读懂图片的方法了，比如，使用替代文本，也就是ALT标记，图片使用与主题相关的命名，图片周围围绕相关的说明，只要这些做好，完全可以达到搜索引擎同样的甚至更好的效果。 三、内部链接 内部链接对SEO来说也是非常有利的部分。比如你的网站上面有大量优质的内容，但没有合理的内部链接机制，一般用户很难找到过去的精google seo华文章。天下生意建议，在文章内容中出现了其他文章的关键词时，请做上链接，每个文章页面同时做一个热门文章、最受好评文章的列表。 这些我们其实有个很好的参考对象，就是维基百科，维基百科的SEO效果想必大家都知道，它做得最成功的地方就是内部链接。 四、标题和URL网址及META标签的优化 天下生意之前也提到过，网站（网页）标题是搜索引擎判定网站（网页）主题的最重要的因素，比如“对于SEO优化的解释”，这是一篇关于SEO的概念文章，但网民却不会那么专业去搜索，我们要做的是提取用户的短语搜索，如“什么是SEO优化”，这更符合用户的搜索习惯，在所有内部锚文本链接中也使用它。所以标题的写法是需要我们花时间去研究的。 META标签，虽然我们知道现在搜索引擎已经不将META列在排名算法中了，但我觉得还是不要忽略，因为描述标签是存在于搜索结果中的，描述是否写的好，直接影响到用户是否会点击进来。 五、关键词研究 一旦确定了大概要写什么主题的文章优化网站后，就先做一些关键词研究，提取这篇文章的主要关键词进行分析，我们可以利用百度的相关搜索及指数来进行分析，以确定最终使用的关键词，并将其自然地穿插到内容中。 在对网站进行SEO（搜索引擎优化）的过程中，很多人往往会将所看到的SEO优化方法不分青红皂白地应用，但这样一来就会出现SEO优化过度的现象，SEO优化过度甚至比不优化还要对网站有危害，只需要注意以下四个方向，就可以避免在优化网站中经常出现的SEO优化过度的情况。 1、保持原创 避免数据重复 内容为王，内容一直是网站最为重要的部分，在发布内容时，极力避免发布网络上已有的重复内容，即使不是原创的文章内容，也要对文章的标题和段落进行一定的修改。否则完全一样的网页复制内容，通常会降低页面的权重，网站在搜索引擎中的友好性就会越来越低。 天下生意提醒，一些CMS程序也很有可能造成数据的重复，如一篇内容有静态页面和动态页面两种显示方式，完全一样的内容，但显示的URL完全不同，这样也会让搜索引擎认为是重复内容，从而降低网站的权重。 2、友情链接宜精不宜多 在SEO优化的过程中，还有许多与友情链接相关的注意事项。例如一定要避免网站链接指向低质量或者内容大量重复的站点，否则往往会降低自己网站的排名。 另外，如果网站中导入的外部链接过多，比如说交换了一百个以上的链接，这样往往也会对自己的网站权重造成影响。 3、页面干净 去除多余标签: 由于对页面的关键词进行内容重要性的标注可以提升排名，所以很多站长往往会在页面中增加很多种标签元素，如对关键词进行加粗、变色、增加H1标签等。但是这种标签的过多使用会起到反作用。即使是要进行SEO优化，网站的页面也还是要干净整洁、代码规范，避免大量使用同一种标签。 小提示：很多SEO优化站长还会采用隐藏文字的方式来进行优化，这样一来可以增加不少关键词，但是用户往往无法看到，不过这样的做法通常会被搜索引擎认为是作弊而进行降权处理。 4、平常心建站 不堆砌关键词 过分堆砌关键词是最为普遍的SEO优化过度现象，这种方式通常是在一个页面中大量地重复同一个关键词，以达到排名靠前的效果。但这样的话就很容易造成页面关键词数量超过一定的比例，这样一来不仅忽略了用户的浏览体验，而且往往会起到反作用。 关键词是否过多，天下生意建议使用关键词密度检测软件来检测，输入网址和关键词，就可以查询到关键词优化是否过度，关键字的密度应该控制在8%以内Google seo。
分享长尾词的种种特征
google优化网站SEO离不开流量，单单的目标关键词带来的流量远远不够，所以还需要大量的长尾来扩充流量。长尾关键词也越来越受到广大站长的重视，这些较具体，搜索次数较低的词由于数量庞大，已经成了流量金矿。虽然长尾关键词是有种种优势，但是并不代表所有的网站都适合长尾，今天本文主要分享长尾词的种种特征，希望看了本文能让大家对长尾有更宽泛的了解 第一、搜索量很小：既然是长尾，就决定了不可能像目标关键词那样每天都有很大的检索量，有时候长尾词更像一个人的思维，每个人的思维都是不同的，或者在不同时候考虑同一问题搜索的词也会有所不同，所以就决定了搜索量很小。 第二、搜索频率不稳定：有可能这个词两天被人搜索一次，也有可能这个词1年之内也只被搜索了一次，尤其是长度较大的长尾词，甚至在数年内也只是被搜索一次，因此它的搜索频率有很大的不稳定性。 第三、竞争程度度关键词优化小：这个主要从两方面看，一是大家的目标都是核心关键词，所以长尾竞争小；二是这些词理论上有无限个，数量巨大，也决定了不可能会被完全覆盖。 第四、词量无限大：每个行业，每个关键词，如果认真去挖掘，根据性能，用途，爱好等细分的话，就会有大批量的长尾可供我们使用。我们可以自己想，也可以借助工具来实现。 第五、目标较精准：如果是核心关键词，用户搜索的时候并不一定真的想找这个词的字面意思，比如用户检索“汽车”这个词，有可能是想买车，有可能是找配件，也有可能是了解行情，但长尾由于字数较长，对用户搜索的词较容易判断真实意图。因此搜索目标就相对精确。 第六、转换率更高：搜索目标的精准性决定了更高的转化率。比如用户搜索“哪里个外贸网站建设公司最好最专业”这个超级长尾词，那么很有可能就是打算建外贸网站的，或者至少是积极寻找信息阶段，是一个潜力客户。而如果只是搜索“网站”，那么就很难判断他的意图。 第七、由几个词组成：长尾关键词一般是以多个词组成或者是较短的句子组成，随着互联网的发展，已经越来越多的用户把搜索引擎当做了一个智能机器，搜索的词五花八样，有些甚至是两个句子组成。 第八、大型网站占优势：谷歌排名一般来说单个长尾关键词的流量很小，但是如果有大量的长尾词，那么流量将是惊人的，但是大量的长尾需要大量的内容做支撑，小型网站很难达到，往往大型网站是用户自动产生内容，在这方面较占优势。 通过这八个方面的特征，我们对长尾的认识会更加深刻些。对于小网站来说，长尾关键词也能发挥其独特的优势，。我们对长尾也不能放松。 1、有关域名的信息 1) 注册信息（注册商、） 2) 以前的应用（仅限被惩罚的网站） 3) 相关域名（seogoogle.com.cn） 4) 是否应用二级域名（独立服务或者子目录权限） 5) 意义（如果是自己的公司，可以提） 6) 是否抢注自己的中文域名 7) PR值 网站备案信息 2、空间的相关信息 1) 稳定性 2) 位置 3) 速度 4) 404 5) 是否支持二级域名 6) 支持的语言（通过动态链接） 7) 独立IP 3、网站构架 1) 网站的拓补结构（网站分类都会在导航里面，如果没有包含在导航的都会以版块形式在网页中显示） 2) Table、Frameset和Div+css的比较 3) 有没有**以上的table嵌套 4) 是否有浏览器兼容的问题（主要指div格式的、“align=“center””） 5) 文件名命名是否苗木合理（有无和广告相关的命名方式？） 6） 有没有五级以上的路径层级 不影响管理的情况下，路径越短越好（文件越靠近根目录越好） 路径与seo 7) 收录数量不一致（站长习惯、解析绑定有问题） 是否应用了二级域名 9) 网页是否过大 （是不是有多余代码、信噪比） 10）网站是否是动态链接 11）是否实现了有效调用 12）http请求和html响应 (大网站) 13）缓存看一个网站有没有缓存(大网站) 15) Robots.txt有没有 16) 是否符合W3C （引擎、浏览器、更改）——根据自己的实际情况 17) 结构设计——在整站优化的时候 ? 言之成文，有可读性（栏目和内容） ? 符合尼尔森的F形状网页浏览模式（主要看是不是把重要内容放到了合适位置、有没有突破限制） ? 能够承载一定的关键词密度(排版) ? 网站结构的一致性（各栏目页的一致、文章页的一致） ? 结构要有静有动（是否过于呆板） ? 结构设计要考虑读者向用户的转化 ? 要让读者对网站或者栏目的层级一目了然（有没有面包屑导航） 4、关键词 1) 关键词选择是否合适？（整站优化） 2) 是否过冷过热？过冷词有没有进行单页面优化？ 3) 是不是有关键词box？—— 一般的网站都没有（优化方案 4) 是否考虑了用户转化？——文章的标题和文章内容 5) 是否有一定的关键词密度——排版和文章 6) 是否有标签（产生相关阅读），标签是不是关键词—— 7) 可以放关键词的地方，这个网站做了哪些 栏目名称是否应用了关键词 9) 文章名称是否包含了关键词 10) 关键词是否进行了相关链接 11) 关键词的扩展是否合适（频道、栏目、专题、最终页面）——关键词树状结构 12) H1中一定要放关键词——分级列表标记关键词 13) 是否应用关键词趋势分析（谷歌热帮、百度风云榜） 14) 是否有专题（抢关键词） 15) 关键词是否有一定的指数！！——可操作的栏目和频道以及核心词 英文seo
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My So-Called Life is definitely suburblack approved! I wished I could dye my hair Crimson Glow (and make out with Jordan Catalano) so many times!
Hi there – I enjoy your writing. I’ve been roped into the nominations for awards process for Bloggers and thought I’d share the love. If you want, you can share the award, if you don’t no worries… it’s all good. Cheers! Heather
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Is this blog still alive?
“I’ve been working on my J.D. in Law, and on starting a non-profit for disadvantaged women.”
You ever notice that no woman ever starts a program for disadvantaged men? Like the 90% of the homeless that are men? How charitable,starting a program that you could theoretically personally benefit from some day. How do you contain all the love inside you,women? How do you do it?
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what is this racist shit? sad that is what you trash focus on.
This is my first time go to see at here and i am actually pleassant to read everthing at one
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It’s no way a white person started and is writing these blogs. These blogs are actual writings by someone of another ethnicity’s thinkings/observations of white people. It’s the only way…there is no other way. The observersations are too dead on. Let me rewrite the title of this blog: “Secrets of a UpandComing (fill-in-the-blank for any other ethnicity) on the SecretLivesofwhites”
So… This whole “Stuff White People Like” is more like “Stuff HIPSTERS Like.” Seriously.. All white people aren’t in the “progressive, counterculture” mindset. Haven’t you ever met a “hick” or a regular viewer of Fox News?
Haha this is epic man
get a life white people stuff like or surbanite scumbags like, not cool cocksmoker like me and the el.
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Even white people need The Rhombus: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUI3Xr1HOnY
wow. and to think…I thought white people only liked each other.
Whats up, hit me up at melstrailerpark.scum these are dirty people unwashed filth the L
I am a 42 year old white male. When I read your witty posts referring to stuff that white people like, I am simultaneously amused and filled with rage…it’s amusing because it’s silly and true at the same time, and enraging because it makes me want to scream at a crowd of white people YOU ARE ALL A BUNCH OF PRETENTIOUS POSERS!!! ALL OF THE HOBBIES AND INTERESTS THAT YOU BLATHER ON ABOUT ARE PATHETIC ATTEMPTS TO PROVE HOW MUCH MORE SOPHISTICATED AND CULTURED YOU ARE THAN THOSE AROUND YOU!!!
It’s almost enough to make me spill that glass of Vouvray I’m drinking right now.
wow what a life. Awesome.
In the future, after America falls, people will look back at the white Americans and just say what a waste, boy where they ever DUMB!
my life depends on people like you. Strong, intuative, and RIGHT
When are you going to do a post about how white people like your blog. Go meta or go home!
ahhhh nice post was a great time pass for me i was doing surfing and your post title forced me to have pause here My so called life ahhhh your title reminds me something about my life i have very struggled life my dad is no more he died at 2004 and i was the elder one all responsibilities came on me in very young age the age to enjoy. My study have been suffered due to that much responsibilities on me anyways the life is still going as it was thanks for this post i am going to bookmark it and i will wait for further updates thanks.
worldisfunny
The American Spectator online rightly described this as “insipid.” Other similar descriptive terms come to mind.
http://www.reverbnation.com/themadsugars/song/15527910-crazy-but-sweet
I grew up in the 80’s, when it was okay to party just for the sake of having fun. So the 90’s just sucked. The music was depressing. Further, I was working and thus trying to broaden my horizons, which led me to wine parties, Buffy the Vampire Slayer chat boards, local music, cafes, operas, etc. I really tried but found these things boring and surprisingly political (democrats of course). Republicans are just as boring with their monster trucks, homophobia, etc. And 3rd party people ended up being, indeed, kooky. So I’ve pretty much given up on socializing, and focus on family and career…been much happier sense.
Stuff White People Like #137: Reading Satire About Themselves
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As a Pro Asian, it is our Duty to keep the White man away from our most precious resource. Our women. White men are corrupting Asian women at a rapid rate, and destroying our Genetic Heritage with their inferior DNA. Everything Caucasians have done, Asian have done and will do ten-fold better. They know this and that’s why they’re destroying families, our traditions and heritage, by exploiting our women. We must fight back and not let them have relationships of any kind with our sisters, daughters, cousins, friends, and especially our mothers. Caucasian men are vile, inferior, war-monging creatures, destroying the earth and it’s people. Keep them away. Notice Asian men don’t flock to White Women, cause we know our women are better. Heck, white men don’t even like white women. lol
http://www.lammutamine.ee is simiral website about what white people like and black people cant have – mostly funny
I like some of that stuff too maybe not all of but some of it
Lord – it took So long to scroll down to say – you Sir, are an Asshole.
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This is awesome and so true!
my so called life sucks man, I smell, live in a trailer park, shit my pants all the time, reek of B.O. cigaretts and shit, I am short and a dumb fuck up, lazy and all round asshole
the I…
your description fits me to a Mr. T.
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Hey, nicely done website. These traits are all the things I do and are the people I relate to when I come to America. I’m such a white person!
I have a suggested post for you: *Conferences. When I come to America for a conference, it is full of white people (which is why I fit in so well!).
See how much of a white person I am on my website.
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Matthew.
do one on Kale PLEASE.
mels is a shithole for trailer park scummers like U
you are a stupid and ignorant fool for creating this blog. All these dialogues are based upon what individuals do and then somehow collectively applying it to only one skin color.
stuff people like ?
LOL…So true. I know many people who can happily sing depressing songs while drunk, etc. Too old for the show, but I get the sentiment.
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If you are reading this shit, chances are, that you are an ass eating cocksmoking fag, you probably like it in the asshole as well, making you an asshole, and if you are living a trailer park, Mels, then you are also a scummer, on the the welfare, right unwashed scumbags.
My comments:
1. I am not white but I was turned onto this site by my white spouse (FYI: he has since told me that he married me because it was a status symbol for him since having a non-white spouse is considered very progressive and “edgy” in the white community —- OK – that was a joke – the status symbol / “edgy” part -not that we are an interracial couple, we are; refer to comment #2 below)
2. I think this whole thing is meant to be funny.
3. I like approximately 65-70% of the stuff listed. Maybe that’s why kids in school used to sneer at me and shout, “stop trying to be WHITE!”
4. Someone commented that a similiar site about another racial group would incite riots and bloodshed. I disagree. I think a “what black/asian/hispanic people like” blog would be funny as sh*t. I know several (non-white) people who would love to set that off — -but they don’t even know THIS BLOG exists. (they’re too busy fighting with their relatives, as one person pointed out). So…
5. That brings me to my next comment: I think white people are the main ones reading this and posting comments. It is an eye-opener to see so much white-on-white aggression (“fukk u you fukking racist!”)
6. There are some universals on this list (like coffee) and some things that actually are more often associated with other races (ex: having debt)
7. My white in-laws are the right-leaning, gun-toting, rural type whites that would complain that this list does not pertain to them (my husband refers to them as “red necks”). But still…. they seem pretty smug when they are out in public somewhere with me. My husband says they love ANYTHING that is “anti-authority” or “anti-establishment” – so I guess being seen in public with their non-white daughter-in-law feels satisfingly defiant (but my husband says that his mom still is not fond of Asian women and it probably has something to do with his dad’s stint in Thailand when he was in the military)
I like trailer park women of any race as long as they smell, ah I like unwashed pussy in the morning, smells like welfare to me.
I live in a double wide and like fucking double wide asses, fuck all ya all, smell it up @ mels shit hole
The blog title is obviously a failure. While it was funnier at first to seemingly target white people, instead of only a (mainly) white minority called hipsters, the punch of it is now wearing out and it just seem confusing.
I know “Stuff hipsters like” would’ve been pretty boring but the current title seems to be putting people way off at times. I mean for example the World Cup thing! Yeah, throwing World Cup parties is exclusively a white phenomenon (it is ridiculous to thing this and yet the title suggest you do, which you probably in fact don’t?????!?!?!?!?). But the irony is getting lost here as well. Who are you actually ironically referring to? Now you’re talking not only from a hipster’s perspective but exclusively from a north american hipster’s perspective and therefore the title containing such a vast population as “the whites” feels completely unfitting.
In fact, if you really were as clever as you think, you would have come up with a better title to make your observations about bohemian urban-dweller culture more accurate and incisive.
Don’t get me wrong, I like some of the stuff but the title is ruining some of it.
smelldogg, trailerparkers are shit people, fuck u take a bath moron
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I am white and I totally loved this show.
fucking whats up with the propane? trailer park dwellers are freesing, I personally have not showered in a month because of the cold
casinos should be on the list, ya know I stayed playing cards, with a shit in my pants, would not even go to the bathroom just let it one go in my pants.
y u no post no more?
This is an entertaning blog
I like the new depends that just came out, YOU can shit yourself and go about your business all fucking day, no leaks nothing, just some dried up shit matted to your asshole hair at the end of the day.
What do you think about to start a new blog about blonde women called Stuff Black People Like?
mels shit hole trailer park, you never smell the same
down and out at mels trailer park, why oh why wont obama help trailer park peeps?
Euhhh êtes vous sûr de ce que vous dites ?
Im going to make a blog called stuff monkeys like
CHek me blog out, stuff trailer park scum like, yeah we ripped off brave new world alittle but whtat da fucks, we live in trailer and smells
sine craxt right wing wckos here, I used to be until I started taking her up the old poop chuter now I am lets just say liberal. live at mels were life blows
I loved that show however they used someone’s life in the process not cool
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I don’t have black friends or white friends or asian friends…I just have friends. The next time a cop treats you like shit because you’re black, instead of bitching about racism maybe you should remember that you’re part of the problem too.
I see from the previous replies that I will likely be dismissed as a ‘honky’. Maybe I should use a racial epithet as well, would that help my point get across? Oh, no, that’s a hate crime. Double standard bullshit like this probably makes Malcolm X roll over in his grave.
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down and out at mels trailer park. well at least I am not a phoney like U, I dont bath and I like smelling like a shit I am the bsoos
STUFF BLACK PEOPLE LIKE
#1 Posting pictures or videos of their toddlers swearing or smoking on social media.
#2 Abortions
#3 having more than five kids
#4 deadbeat dads
#5 white women
#6 Uneducated children
#7 dropping out of high school
#8 gangs
#9 black on black violence
#10 jail
#11 always being the victim
#12 Blaming white people for their problems
#13 not working
#14 Being overweight
#15 having horrible looking tracks or weave
#16 smelling like they haven’t showed in 2 weeks
#17 illiteracy
If your black and google the statistics on many of these I’m sure you’ll resort to #12. I can handle that!
Yo living it up at your mels trailer park shit hole, gut me firtst disablilty cechk money, I luv americas
@ the ladies my tongue is bigger than my dickie, holla if you want to get your stink box licked at the trailer park
being a trailer park scum is roguh man its freezing, snots are frozen shit is matted to asshole hair, all so you can make fun of me, your welcome, I smell so bad i make myself puke, and the fresh puke smelled better than me.
Wow! If I made a blog called stuff black people like, blacks would be screaming racism.
@Mike, really mike that is some insight, if you read some comments here, you will see you are the only one to come up with that thought. Can you say DUH
Hey there, I love the blog!
One observation, shouldn’t the blog be more aptly named, “I’m a racist and this is my racist blog”?
Anyway, I really admire your desire to continue perpetuating racism even though we are well into 2015! Good luck to you and your continued racism!
Before anyone read this, I will make it clear that right now I am in fucking RAGE. So proceed with caution this could look like a primitive, racist, unintelligent response.
Thank you.
WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT ON THAT FUCKING SIDE OF THIS SHITGLOBE YOU WERE THINKING? If these fuckning HELL-O-MIGHTY CONQUERTHEWORLDAMERICANS shits, are to represent every white on the planet, then throw them in a hole, KILL THEM ALL. And all you ignorant fuck reading this and finding this “funny”, go die with theam as well.
First of all let’s have a history lesson, my fucking people were slaves for almost 500 fucking years, and yes I am white.
So to indicate, that every shit eating white would avoid saying christmas (Yes Merry Christmas to all Muslims, fuck cares, by the way I am pagan) or saying other day-to-day things to others like blacks or asians, because they have guilt, is fucking retarded.
Why?
Because I don’t fucking care if the colonial empires put their dick in the rest of the world’s asshole, I was not fucking part of it, nor my goddamn dead ancestors were part of it. They didn’t had the fucking time to lift a toothpick in Africa, because they were busy fucking STARVING, and fucking MASSACRED.
Shit they never even seen any black nor asian, besides only when they invaded us as auxiliary forces of Tatars and Turks. So to point out I never had any white guilt, nor any of us, more like you should have the guilt, because you fucked up my country hand-in-hand with the VODKACYBORGRUSSIANS, who coulnd’t even drive a bicycle when they arrived (they put them in the shallow street trenches, sat on and used it like a child motorbike, with their legs).
Basically you just came (MUTHAFUCKAMURIKKANS), and started bombing the shit out of every city you saw, civilians? fuck cares, schools? fuck cares, people working on the fields? target practice.
SPOILERS: Holy shit USA saved the world again, those rampaging peasants and children, who nefariously hid in the cellars to defeat our glorius country, are neutralized. Hurray!! O! say can you see by the dawn’s…
But you are not the only one, others fucking killed and invaded big time, more than you: French, English, Germans (nazis too), Russians (commies too), Austrians, Serbs, Croats, Bulgarians, Italians, Czechs, Slovaks, Turks and Mongols (also some now extinct peoples).
Why do I tell this to you? Because all of these except the latter three, were white people. So to say that I, on the basis of skin color, have any association with them is herecy.
For me this fucking whiteness means NOT A SHITASSBLOODYFUCKERGOAT thing, I am fucking pile it off if you want, its all red underneath. Skin is nothing, speaking my own separate language, culture, thinking, way of life, symbolism and writing is ALL WHAT MATTERS.
Ps. forgot to say KILL EM ALL, KILL EM ALL.
Ps.Ps. Why would any sane person maintain kinship with a same color man, whose ancestors come in and cut off every child’s head in the city, then forced the parents to build pyramids out of the heads, then sliced the parents belly, put wood in there, then ignited the wood (Serbs did this to us);
Or just killing of the father, then raping his wife and daughters, and forcing them and all the born children to live with the killer as a loving family (Russians did this to us);
Or sending the father and his underaged son to the front, but when they arrive another officer accuse them that they are deserters (who deserts in the direction of the front?) and shoot them (Germans did this to us);
Or going home after the war you see that your home village was cut in half, and the new border is going through houses, and gardens, and you can no longer visit your grandparents who happen to live on the other side of the village (French did this to us);
Or that the monarch of the invaders announces that your local currency worth 1/100 times its current worth, and you can’t even buy an egg on your monthly salary (Austrians did this to us);
Or that you are an unvanted pest in a newly formed country what never existed before, and declair you secondary citizen, force you out of your home, confiscating all your property, with only one suitcase (Czechs and Slovaks did this to us, they are basically the same though).
No, you are american, unionist, internazional or liberal shits would ever understand this, because you don’t have a separate language, culture, thinking, way of life, symbolism or writeing; just a mix of all that shit floating in the international medium.
You are still bounded to the curse of the English, the disease of world domination, and until your native language is English, you are not free from that.
From my point of view I at a fucking HYDROGENBOMBASSHAULING war with the US and its DICKSUCKERCALF the EU.
I switch on the tv what do i see? ENGLISHSHITMECDONALDSPARISHILTONOILCRISIS, EAT ENGLISHSHIT IT MAKES YOU BUTIFUL, PUT ENGLISHSHITWORDS in your sentences when you speak your native language so you look like less TURDIERHOBOBEARD.
Guess the only foreign language was allowed in elementary school to learn to me: that is right FUCKAMUTHAENGLISHSHIT.
Do you understand? You are in my face, I open the fridge: YOU, I open the toilet: YOU, I open a random womens VAG on the street: YOU. Stop fucking invading me, after that you can make a blog about: STUFF GAYELFPALERSKINNYLIBERALCONSERVATIVEMURIKKANFAGGOT PEOPLE LIKE.
Until that don’t bring other respectable, sane, honest, kind, courteous and good-hearthed people’s ass on the line with them.
By the way I like architecture, but I never like a building because some SNOBTALLGRIZZLEDWHITEMIDGETFATASSHISPANICTRANSVEST ITE says so, but because I actually like it. UNDERSTOOD? And not only goes for that, it goes for everything else. Why would I like a Ferrari for its brand, if it accelerates like a
Polski-Fiat? (it is actually the best car though, try 126p). Makes no sense. And that is main principle why I have written this in the first place.
The importance of cultural like-mindedness, I knew somebody who had a foreigner girlfriend, and for instance what she had found funny, the guy didn’t, and vica-versa. First she didn’t understand it, but then she ralized, that because their two peoples, background, language, culture is different no matter what was their skin color, they never really could understand eachother.
So if you born here and you skin color is different, but you speak like me, think like me, have the same customs like me, then you are my people, and that is because you just as I, in this case PRESERVE the same culture I am part of.
And that is why this blog is BULLSHIT.
Where are the entries on Cross Fit, the Paleo diet, hemp/almond/cashew/walnut milk, and giving kids first names that are actually last names (Madison, McKenzie, Parker, Flynn, Asher)?
I like watching the blacks riot and burn da hood, makes feel superior.
Just shit my pants, tweet about that assholes
you ho’s get yeast infections in your stink box, well I got one in my asshole. I feel your pain
Well written article! Great job, keep up.
Rudy how are your hamsters? Put that aside and relize the benefits of trailer park life!
Outstanding job, cheers.
vermin, thanks for the kind words, please keep up with moron trailer park scumbag blog, smell ya later, L
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Kids I’m am going in for a fat shit, check me out on fartbook
I miss this blog!
life @ mels trailer park heaven is a real good dealo, so check it out, what are you waiting for , we need you in the scum village
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wow, I just got a wiff of myself, gross, smell like an old shit, my fucking trailer is so smelly and shitty I should be given an award for dirtest motherfucker alive, viva busura blanca!
Working on my 3 pointer, white people luv the 3, because they can’t dunk, I may be an old trailer park bum, but I got range
I couldnt get into 11 asian bitches, I must say I am interested, more on this later
Mmmmmm, Jared Leto as Jordan Catalano, damn right I’m swooning. 😀 First time I ever saw or heard of him, and I rang my best friend immediately to let her join in my swooning! lol And that show was brilliant! As for 90s fashion, as a 90s teenager, I loved it, and I still love it (I don’t WEAR it, just love reminiscing about it!). Not sure about the “white” joke in this, but I guess it was more of a white thing, but then are you saying no black people watched MSCL?
But I miss my combat boots and flannels. And I lived in Seattle. I miss that too. Sigh.
Kids, I just took an incredible dump, the stuff only a trailer park moron could do. Back over to the chink joint, tell the gooks over there how great a shit I just took.
Did these posts end when you finally picked up a white chick?
Tato, White chicks are the worst, terrible in bed,cant cook, are stupid and lazy. If you are an upper class white guy, you go with an asian girl, smart and sexy. If you are a working class white guy, go with a latina, hard working women, take great care of home, kids, and their man. If you are a bum well a white girl may suit you best!
white girls also age badly, gross, fat old pigs by 35, no room for the sow in my trailer. She may have food stamps, but still not worth it. get a chink for your dink
someonge asked Tim what do you think of Black broads, I sany they are Great! Really love being wit thaem just stay away from ugly white women
tim smell, should I take el batho?
If ‘My So-Called Life’ and ‘Freaks and Geeks’ had a love child, it would perfectly encapsulate my (early 80s) HS experience.
I miss this blog. Anyone know what happened to it?
You kids hit me up on your facebook, ask me about my asshole, man I will tell you I let them ripo, nobody can shit like a trailer park moron, actually semi-retarded 60 year old , by land or by sea, you see.
@S The dude moved on to bigger and better, like that crap tv show, the border, he is makeing big $, Check out my trailer park blog, diary of my asshole, Welcome to Mels trailer park heaven, a real good dealo thats it for now got to go take a shitski
hear we are folks, and not one person aks how my asshole produces such wonderful little pets, I actually name my shits, and I think I will name the next one after you, asshole
History repeats itself. Thats one thing wrong with history.
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Yo I just totally enjoyed a recreational ennima I am still shiting! enjoy the L
This website is racist ! Unbelievable ! And gay expecting someone to accept that being gay is OK is also wrong ! Physiologically speaking, the parts don’t fit, they weren’t meant to be used with the same gender….so gross ! Being gay is sexual deviance plain and simple. No one is ever born gay , no one can change their gender either, the gender you were created as is what you’ll always be no matter what you attempt, so sick it up and accept what you are you spoiled little brats !! Amen
Welcome Joyce. Well I have said all along white people are the scum of the earth, and I am living proof. You should hear what white people say, when blacks, jews, Latinos, Muslims, are not in the room, yup we loves some backstabbing, I am a rat, so what ever you need to know about the great white trash race ask old stinky.
Ok so we white people are so fucking racist. If you are even a little tan you get treated a little bit worse than the more pale whites and the tanner ones treat the ones that are a little darker then them like shot and down it goes. But tjis only applies to Arian. If you have anything other than Arian blood you would never know we do this with one another. Consider me the fly on the wall that tells it all. If you are black you are a monkey. And if you are in a crosswalk or within distance you are points. The fatter the monkey the more points your worth but you can only claim points if u run that monkey over. And BTW. If you ever get busted by the cops for hit and run and the cop is of Arian race all you gotta tell him you were just scoring some points and your good. Yea its fucking great to be white and on top of the food chain. When is the last time your white friend actually got a speeding ticket. Another perk, we don’t get those. You do.well have a good one and if you want to know any dirty little secrets white people say about all you below us just ask. Ill tell you. Bye bye
well heil hitler to that asshole, now lets get back to talking of my awesome assholey. You miillenals are dubm fucks. When it come to dropping mass destruction out of my asshole, watch out, the whole trailer park ducks and covers, Tim just took a shitski!
Oh yeah, ayran you all lost, just saying, like that guy Jesse Owens, kicked your ass. stay out of the trailer park, were inbred superior to ayran
having waded through most of the detritus in this comment section, I’ll have to go with Joyce as the winner of the trolling comp. Using a poe-faced rendition of the classic ‘uptight Christian’ template, complete with that smooth little ‘Amen’ at the end … And for bonus points, correct spelling mixed with shitty punctuation and a “spoiled little brats”.
8/10 + a blue ribbon.
Joyce is a fucking whore, amen to that, suck my fat hog, cum to mels trailer park an just smell me. Kids I voted early and vote for Hillary! We did very well with Bill, I think we will do even better with HRC, I am with her, trailer parkers for Hil dog.
I just got a wiff of myself, gross, smell like an old shit, my fucking trailer is so smelly and shitty .Wholesale Snapback Hats
Hola Mallo, did you take a smelfie? It really helps in our new age, if you can smell yourself, you may or may not need a bath, but its time to start thinking about 1, I generally change the whites, my dirty undies, once a decade, what about you”
Kids, Millenilas, I just took a huge one, wow magnificent.
yankerman/capt. fuck youse from mels trailer park, shit whole captial of da world,
The shit I dropped this morning, is now on my facebook page for your viewing pleasures. I let it go on the trailer next to mines, hope the asshole steps in it when he gets home from work, sucka. i stays on the wl
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Haha, this is one of the different topics I have read today, everyone might have different opinions on each subject. Keep writing!
Massive, the size of the dump I just took! My toilet in my trailer could not handle the fucking thing, so huge, bigger than trumps
This years beating list is due out, dont find yourself on it, or you will catch a beating, or at the very least I will stink you up with my presense.
I swear to you, I just took the most incredible shit, you might just be able to smell, enjoy it through the comptuer. get some at mel.s trailer park and moron center
At first I felt this whole blog was just stupid. Then I noticed with a search that the blog author Christian Lander is a snowflake juvenile millennial ginger. Did ya march and protest Trump too you entitled trust fund cherub?
Dump trump the chump, he fooled us folk in trailer park nation once, we are on to him now, phony fraud. Took us morons for granted, well not anymore, we want obamas back. I got to go take a shit now white peoples
White people are so fragile lol
Run Tim Run, that is what we are hearing in trailer parks across the cuntry. The next candidate, Catp tim the yankerman from mels fab shithole. We will get to work right away on trailer park care for everyone, except your blacks of course.
Browser History, Really white peoples, Well mine is open for all to see. The problem is what stupid white people do with it, that is why privacy matters, it is more about protection, Are you reading this uncle, well I just to a big shit, logging off, and jerking off. Capt Tim, yankerman, moron, trailerpark hero to all
Yeah Quanda, your point is valid, that is why, white folk are called snowflakes,
its their pampered, white privilege type life, yup all scumbags, even us in your trailer park, living high off the hogs, while you suffer in the projects. I am your captain Quandas, tim of mels fab.
Angela Davis did nothing wrong
What, Tim pls, you are so fragile. Find something to do in real life.
Quanda, you sound kinda hot, every think of cumming down to the trailer park, like visting a zoo, I will be your host. What is real life?
小咸鱼
Cleaning up my act for my new girlfriend Quanda.
Just took a tremendus dump. wherer is bumpy, ras
my stool today had a lot of blood in it, Very angry looking turd, said don’t fuck with me, I tried to flush, but it would not go down, so fuck it, leave it there for the next scumbag, enjoy my shit, fuck yous
This is going to help the black guys who desperately wish they were born white.
I’m clearly missing the humor (and therefore the supposed brilliance) of this post. The author seems like a huge drag.
trailer park heaven is a real good dealo, that with food stamp, and the weli chiek make for a nice life, a lil meth and off I goes, yeah being white is so speacial
Just took a huge dumpsie. My whole trailer smells like a fresh pile of shit. If you pay taxes, thank you. You work so I can lounge in the trailer park.
Hey! You haven’t updated in seven years, there’s all sorts of new shit white people like!
I just updated my dump trailer park on asshole book, all milen jerk offs checker outs
HaHa I never seen that program ,but After reading this little hit piece, I had to YouTube it . Funny stuff— I’m white but I’m not politically correct like the kind of white people portrayed on this blog. MAGA
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Wow, Johnny Rottens, nothing better, makes my day. That and a marbie, fuck you, cunt
took a huge fresh shit, and just let it float, nice for the next scumbag, finished off by pissing all over the seat, I hope some how, way it was you, that ran in to take a dumpski and found this mess, ah ah ah , tim J. scumiott
Please go back to updating this.
Ok Lexi, It has been awhitle, but here is a very important update from Mels trailer park. It is a great day, when one of the trailer park hookers, lets you finger her, lets just say I had a good day Lexi, how about you?
If you were wondering, my asshole smell delicous, thte fragance of a GOCD and to you work a day scum, thanks for the taxes, keep paying, living large off the welfare, ;fuck all ya alls
#137: Reading stuffwhitepeoplelike.com
White people don’t actually like reading this site, but sooner or latter, all white people are asked to describe white culture only to realize that they haven’t a clue what white culture is (except for the wrong kind of white people). After some initial denial that such a thing exists, white people will conduct an extensive Google search (not actually using Google.com but one of those search sites that allegedly doesn’t track you for advertisement placement purposes) they’ll discover a link to this site. Rejoice, rejoice now they can describe white culture without doing any actual work. But never tell white people about this stuffwhitepeoplelike.com as they will forever resent that they didn’t already know about it.
Waiting for After-Work Happy Hour to be added to the list.
Wating for POTUS Donald J. to be added, only whites like this mf. I just took a masive, fucking dumpski, my asshole knows no limit. what is the biggest shit you ever took? Mine are fucking huge, a nice shit, and a marlboro red, good for loe timskis
trailer park tango? Tim tell us what it is it? Well Kids a trailer park tango is when the old lady cums home and finds you going at your daughter
Whats up with my shit white people? The only white people I like are the ones in my fucking pocket, now with Tubman coming, who needs your ass!
Whats up with my shit white people? The only white people I like are the ones in my fucking pocket, now with Tubman coming, who needs your ass!
blood in my stool this morning, asshole on fire white peopel mels
been down PR saving lives, like only a white man can!
Kids, just took a monster of a shit, for halloweenie. the smell is of the charts, I love to smell myself.
“MY SO CALLED LIFe” is all about defecation. The discharge of feces, really what life is all about and how you do it. Do you shit on others when you get the chance? Most white peo[lles do, it is what white is all about, I big time, live at mels fucking trailer park, so fuck you, cum bye I will shoot a load in your face.
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earn free tulips, price going through my trailer roof, f.u.
I am a white moron, i think you are to.
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I just give men, the love they can’t find. Most women are just nag ass bitches, but me its just love honey. That is why all white men love call girls.
wow, I am so fucked up, feels really good, lifestyles of the pale and victoruis
bitemecoing up your asshole, live at mels vlulmino trail pike, pukeer, suck my asshole and this shit is for you.
Stuff that white people like…at number 136 – that’s life.
I like life, it lets me experience so much – I can watch TV, eat good food and chocolate, taste the best ice creams, earn money and so som much more!
Ya, just enjoy my friends. Being white is really cool. I mean we have it all.
I am the boss of Mel’s fucking trailer park, and of the fine trailer womans are mine, I am your Captain!
Relax youngings I am your Captain, therefore you have no worries!
Kicking back enjoying a smellwiser, brew of the trailerpark scum
I may have just shit my pants, yup I did. That is my so called life. Well I guess, I ‘ll go for a smoke, change can wait. I got the new depends, I can shit myself and go all day with out changing, or all week, fuck it.
Kids, you die through your rectum. Yup cancer of the asshole, the big casino. Don’t end like Chemosabi, take care of your asshole, keep her nice and clean. Thoughts from your Captain.
why blog about messing oneself, well underlings {dat wayt yu are} white life is all about shitting on your fellow man tby any means. I am your scumbag, out tere being white trash, keep her proud whites, my whites have brown streaks, an yellow spots
talk about your hemroids baby.
Kids, just met a very famous lady, married star. she asked if I would finger her, I agreed. she also asked if we could keep it between us. I agreed. But we are white, so if anybody wants to know her name, I would be happy and proud to brag it up. See to those other races, that is really what white people are all about. ask it shall be given.
just took a huge fresh shit, thought you should know, yes I am white, thanks for assing
just fingered a hooker @ mels fab trailer park
Ahoy Capt. Tim, who is this famous woman, you claimed to have fingered?
Well Walt, Let just say I applied rotation on her sugar plumb, aboard Air Force One!
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My bowel movements shook up the world, I must be the greatest.
Live at mels
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If this helps make you less of a racist you might want to pay attention. God is not white. Most White people are a mentally ill and racist group of people. Asians are arse kissing white people wanna-bes and not intellectually superior to anyone!!! Let them join the scum maybe they will stop eating dogs! The Majority of Blacks are beautiful, intelligent, strong, talented, and envied by everyone else!!! Most Whites are just the smelly scum at the bottom of a trash heap! So that just makes the majority of white people plain fucking ordinary, ugly, trashy, lowclass, dangerous, dirty, fleabag, racist lushes!!! Whites always walk around with animals and bagging their filthy dogs sh!+. Then they enjoy letting that nasty creature that licks its own sh!++y anus, lick them in their mouths and faces.
Lashawnda, why would a white person, want to be less of a racist? We white folks are inbred, so check your facts. All Whites are 100% racist, believe B.
stuff white people like that you should add to the list:
-throw pillows and blankets
-the renaissance fair
-record stores/vinyl LPs
-the women’s march
-brunch (even more than breakfast)
-drinking out of mason jars
-patio furniture
-shakespeare in the park
-the beatles
-talent shows
-gender reveal parties
-ancestry.com
-acappella
-channing tatum
-yelp
-overalls
-finding an acoustic guitar at a house party
-skits
-forming rock bands
-scented candles
-lululemon
-bachelor/bachelorette party decorations
White people like the smell of their own shit.
Rose, I hate fucking beatles, garbage. But I do like to drop a duce, and leave it there for the next person. white people
MIlens, ever clean out your belly button? I do about every 10 to 15 years, what a stink yup enjoy fingering myself to!
how many shits, will the average white person take in their lifetime?
juct checking in, as I run this site. Just took a huge damaging shit, wow mass destruction, only wish I was in a public restroom, so I could leave it there, for a public viewing, butt as I am home in my trailer, I flushed the monster!, My asshole still hurts, check me out of facebook, and on twitter #moron
Home for the hollies, drinking some smellwisers, about to jerk it off,
yup, still running shit, the man, any you young chicks impressed, I will (forgot how to spell will, tough one) anywhere, finger you!
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Yup, a hooker let me finger her, she turned out to be a guy, butt, a hole is a hole
This is hilarious 😂😂😭😭 absolutely spot on
awoke with an ass rash. You kids been messing with the out house at Mels fab trailer park. 2019 I still live in a fucking trailer, weird mask on.
White girls loved to be fingered, because they are retarded.
this whole page should be re-titled as Stuff That Queers Like.
J.C. Bose University of Science and Technology, YMCA, Faridabad. NGF College of Engineering & Technology (NGFCET) is being run under the aegis of New Green Field Educational Society, Delhi. The society is in the field of education since 1964. The college is approved by AICTE, DTE, Govt of Haryana. The college is spread over 26 acres of land and located at a 71Km stone on NH-2, Palwal, Faridabad.
kids my asshole, is heaven, come on in!
Best Engineering and Management college in India
Best Engineering and Management college in India
NGF College of Engineering & Technology (NGFCET)>: is being run under the aegis of New Green Field Educational Society, Delhi. The society is in the field of education since 1964. The college is approved by AICTE, DTE, Govt of Haryana J.C Bose University of science and Technology, YMCA, Faridabad. The college is spread over 26 acres of land and located the 71Km stone on NH-2, Palwal, Faridabad, Haryana(NCR Delhi). The Campus provides pollution free and very creative environment, where students can focus on their studies without any interruption. The campus houses world-class lecture theaters, laboratories, workshops & equipment.
The Best Engineering and Management college in India offers B.Tech Courses in disciplines like Mechanical, Electrical, Electronics & Communication, Computer Science, Civil, Fashion & Apparel engineering and lateral entry directly to the 2nd year(LEET), M.Tech courses in ECE, CSE & ME, BBA & MBA.
kids this shit is cone, it is over, so Capt. Tim is moving on, not up just on, if you wanna keep up with my taking dumps episodes, cum on over to facebook, where the morons are.
totally reminds me of something
Will surely follow this idea of you.This blogs is very good for all the readers!!
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Just released my hot new porno video! It is titled No Viagra needed! Ya, your finger needs no Viagra, and thats what I do, and the girls love it! In the Video I finger this crack whore at the trailer park, and to make it more interesting, after I’m done, I realize it is my own daughter! Living in the trailer park is pretty cool! I am really amazing.
I never thought I’d see the day were the descendant of a slave gets to witness SJW’s commit white-on-white violence and hate against each other. Let me know when I can crown the movie, “White Man’s Burden” best movie of all time!
CALL OF DUTY! Capt. Tim reporting for DUTY. Just posted a new vid. of your Capt. taking a duty on the floor of a locker room and walking off, leaving the gift for the underlings. waht a smell I alomst fucking pucked, white power is in our shit, out of our assholes, and out of our mouths!
Just took a massive shit on the floor of a coffee shop,waitress paid me in free food to do it, to her scumbag employer! Let me know I will shit on whatever asshole you need me to, your boss to your mom1
Liz, “white man’s laughing” I never thought I would live to see the day where descendants of slaves gets to call each other the n-word, well trained monkeys, laugh when I hear it, keep up the good work homes
Kids, first post of 2020, why you ask? Well, old timski has been constipated. Horrible battle with my asshole, much like dealing with you. Thanks for reading you piece of shit
Asna 54 yr old white person i know i do not have any rights to express my feeling on race. However, my first crush was african american. I have had sex with and dated males with darker skin. I love all people. My best friend since 1986 is a married with 2 children hispanic man. My friend and favorite realestate agent is an african american. I bought a house in the country and knew that a elderly blk lady lived across the road. I had known that for years. My son and i fell right in to their world. The lady did not have to nat her eye twice and we were there just as if it were our own family. Because of my upbringing as a Christian i applied those beliefs. This family all goes to church every time the lock pops open on the church house and we exchange beliefs and we even commented back and forth racial beliefs. All was grreat for about a yr and a half. Then i began to feel tension imposed by the ladies offspring. They do not see to her on a regular and it made them look bad and feel bad because of their own conscious eating away. It has become almost intolerable to exist in my own space. My son and one of the family members are close in age and hit it off right away. 19 yr and 22 yr old males. This family member of hers is a great grandchild and had not spoken to or seen his grt grandmother in a couple of years to spite the fact that he lives a football field away. He began to stop in occasionally and go over when my so was doing chores for her. I am a legally blind person on none of the family has ever offered me a ride for nothing. I asked out of desperation for a ride to the dr and was stood up. I spent a month in the hosp and the only one out of this family that came to see me was the 22 yr old. But one of their family was in the hospital and i got invited to go see her. My son and i always took her food ready to eat made sure all was well. Our vehicle broke down for almost a month and did anyone of this family give us a ride to the grocery store? Hell no. We and the neighbor family were planning a dual birthday party for my son and her great grandson in law who just got out of prison. The elderly lady called me several times over a week talking about the party and i offered to cook what she wanted me to or whatever. On the following sunday her yard began to fill with cars. We were not told when the party was so, we just hung out at home. In short we were left out andnthen it got smeared and blamed for not knowing and all of the cooking and bla bla bla. It was a pure and simple set up and on my sons birthday. We could have just left and gone to do our own thing. But it had to be smeared in our face that we were white and its ok to treat a neighbor like dog crap. So they can beat folks with their bible and take our food and home repairs and yard help and me cleaning up after their christmas mess after 50 peopke leave thisnold 93 yr old lady to fend for herself as they judge, bash and leave in the name of Christianity… is this a cool story? Ya if you think kindness should be punished. It is a sad and pittiful world. I will be glad when my time here is over.
Youse kids are retarded and will never be the man, like I am.
Just sittting home at mels trailer park, just playing with myself, enjoying, my daughter walks in and says can I help with that, I’m really good, I said sure give it tug. my daughter what a fucking whore, am I proud!
questuin for the ladies. My stool has a bit a blood in it, my asshole is on fire, I was wondering is that the way your pussy feels at that time of the month?
Kids, becarfaul during the novel coroana outbreak, stay in. Ony of yous asked Tim I wanna stay in but how do I earn a living like you. Well kids I let you in some secerts. I sold my nickname and now live off the royalties, my nickname given to me by hookers, GOLDFINGER! Now I know you Ho’s want to be fingered by me.
why dos you white girls like to be fingered so much? the one that just cum against Joe. Well if you are shut in and need to be fingered, I ‘ll cum right overs by land or seamen I am your captain. I finger for free
Wow this page is retro yet still relevant
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Hey Trump, how about a stimuls for us hookers, things are tough in the trailer park.
The Challenge: Yes I did it can you. I dare you. I stuck my finger right in my asshole, and then right to the nose, smells delicous. Try it I am addict to it love the smell of my own asshole. God is good.
I just found this blog and holy fucking shit this dude has been actively trolling on this post for 7 WHOLE ass years! God damn what a world!
Props
Well, thanks Wow! Tough live in this fucking mental institution.
Ahh what whit the challenge? Yous kids scard of the Capt. or your own asshole.
Alright I’ll put it to the white girls, yup, stick your fingers in your stink box, I bet my asshole smells better!
this blog is dedicated to my asshole.
new vid posted on tiktok of your Capt. Tim just taking a red hot bloody shit, I stink I ‘ll make millions of this.
I posted a vid. of myself taking a dump in the CVS. I was yelling now do you have any fucking toilet paper? Best part was when the spanish women cam over and hit me with a broom. I love tiktok, will post a jerkoff vid nest
Well, big election cuming up, who do you kids like. I don’t think it really matters. Trump is a left wing liberal and Joe is just trying to be more liberal. My daughter tells what to think, as I am an idiot. I think I’ll vote for Joe, as we have something in common. Soclialsm dosnt works. Print some more money and rake up some more debt, youse kids are doomed. If yous had any sense you would vot e Capt. Tim of Mels fuking trailer park, I am your scmbag, fu
So happy I found, super fun site! Time for an update, and time to block this clown Tim!
Red tide Karen, I thought I smelt you. Great timing, we are having a super fun orgy at Mel’s fab trailer park, so if you can found us, cum on down. Now I know what you are saying “Tim even at an orgy nobody will fuck me, I am so fat.” Every orgy needs a box spring hog and even a gross pig like you will be fucked multiple times. Let me know, good to hear from you fat Karen.
Hey Tiny Tim, SUCK MY CUNT!
Wow, you really are a KAREN! Right its time to update, #137 Fat white bitches named Karen. Now if you are cumming to our super fun orgy, you must wash up your stink box. and you must stay on the urine stained mattress behind the dumpster, you are far to fat for my trailer. And you will have golden showers performed on you, because you were right, nobody wants to fuck you, but we will piss on you, now fuck off Miss Piggy!
Wow it has been 10 years to the day from the last blog here…. I feel old.
WHY MASK DON’T WORK! I will layout the science for you. So we had a great thanksgiving at Mel’s fab trailer park. We scored 3 turkeys and all the fixings for various foodbanks. Thanks to you suckers for donating, anyway we had just about the whole park over for the dinner. Only a few folks had on masks, my ho daughter being one and some old hags. MY daughter goes around telling people you must put on your mask. I sit next to her at the table and purposely shit my pants, wait about 15 minutes, and then, what the fuck is that smell, did you shit yourself she yells. Well gee I say how would know with that mask on? Did my shit fumes leak through? See if the smell of a fresh shit gets through the mask, then covid does. We all laughed at her and few more guest also shit themselves. So mask up if you are an idiot, I prefer to shit my pants and laugh at you.
Science or lack there of part 2: My daughter and I take a cab from the trailer park to the free clinic. Here is what the doctor said “I find it rather odd that you and your daughter come into the free clinic on the same day with the same STD” Well Doc maybe we should some contact tracing, hmm, but we were
quarantined in my trailer just the two of us? This quack can’t figure this out, just give me my shot and let me go.
Ya, so the covid test are not 100% accurate, well ya dumb fuckers, if loss of smell is a symptom of the covid for $10 bucks, I will let you open the door to my trailer and walk in. If you don’t run out, or feel vomit cumming up your throat (this is from the odor) you have the covid. Just helping out the dummies in the medical community. Merry Christmas to all you white pos.
Hope ya alll had your Merry Christmas, now get out there and spread that covid. I have alot invested in a creamatorium.
So we were just sitting watching a movie and my daughter says to me I love to just chill and pull pubic hair out of my mouth. What a whore!
and celery my daughter give me the foodstamp card and tells me to get her some celery, cause she digs it with celery, and a Cream soda! Does it have to be cream soda you whore
Glad my daughter digs it with celery. Anyway on my way out of the trailer park, I threw am empty pack of smokes out the window of my jeep. Some old hag starts yelling at me, I sweep up after you everyday, stop throwing trash out the window. Do you know who I am, I yelled back. Apparently not. Well as I pointed out in my podcast, I wear all day depends. All day, lots of shit and piss in there. So the very next day, I drive out the park, there is the old hag with her broom, why don’t you ride on that broom, you old witch, I yelled as I threw yesterdays pair of depends full of shit, right at her.
Check out our latest and greatest podcast tonight, live @ Mel’s trailerpark, Capt. tim the imbecile your host! My daughter will be with us to discuss, being juked by a baby octopus and being spewed upon with cream corn, getting off with a Dr. Brown’s cream soda and even celery. One of my first thought was if you enjoy getting off with celery, why can’t that fat fuck do the same with a bar of soap. Maybe Karen hasn’t heard of soap and water, but we will reach out to Ms. redtide and ask her to wash up her pie.
Doing the tik tok challenge on our latest podcast, hillarous. I call my daughter, when she answers, I say I cant talk now, she is pissed you called me asshole, she says, fuck :I was in the tub just having some me time, fingering myself, and I got up to take your call, ala sw super whore kendell. Fuck you I gotta shit attacking me I say, and its true, the fucking things just cum ramming out of your asshole. check out our podact on I fart radio, follow us on twitter or some other brainless app you are on losa
Hello, and thanks to all who donated on our go fund me page, to help the people in Texas. My daughter set the whole thing up, we raised money for a fellow trailer park in Texas, we helped with food and propane. My daughter said Pay it forward. What a great idea, it triggered a genius thought in my pea brain. What if we could lay it forward? So we all have times of anxiety, depression, worries. What if there was a go fuck me page, hey I,m down and out lonley just need a fuck. It would help people, and would prevent people from destructive behavior, drugs booze or worse. So Lay it forward, throw someone a fuck, what do you think?
KIds, just got off a zoom call with some Govs. and Fauci, they said thery doing everthing they can to get the jab inot peoples arms. Vax Lottery, joints for jabs, and beers, but still not enough people are getting jabs, what can we do Captain. Well I said buckle up, how about blow jobs for jabs, yup all the boys of all ages will line up and dthe girls will line up to give them, you probable dont eve have enough vaccines. They all agreed with one female gov, offering to blow me as a n ad to get things going, I told her I dont need the shot as I am a superior human, butt she can still blow me. She was a little chubby and had a trailer park thing going on, not bad. Your welcome, get out there ad geet the vax.
great pick up lines from the Capt. Take me I’m yours, you hole.
Someone did something? Yeah one of you kids are posting using my name, not good. The imposter with the fake posts have many misspelled words, I think on purpose, trying to make your Captain look like an idiot. I am thinking it might be that fat pig Karen. Kind of thing that fat whore would do. Karen have you washed yet? Ever hear about soap and water? I can smell your stink box through this screen, wash up your pie pig. Time for a marlboro.
white people also like to resurrect a decade old comment section and confuse the heck out of any outside observers. I’m surprised pickup trucks missed the list, with one major requirement: Trucks must be able to hold a 4×8 plywood sheet flat and still allow the gate to close.
It’s kinda sad that so many people in the comments section didn’t get the self-deprecating humor in the list, but I enjoyed it. You don’t get to pick your friends way out in farm world where the nearest neighbor is 1-2 miles away and it would serve anyone well to get past hangups as quickly as possible so you can look after one another.
Well in America, we don’t need to look after one another, we have big brother, uncle takes care of us from cradle to crave, that home of the brave and land of the free is long gone, we now are the land of the freeloader. We call it riding the gravy train. I hope you enjoyed my comments, as I am a Captain and a fucking moron.
Thanks for informative article. It was helpful for me. I agree with you all the topic you made.
So I am at home in my awesome trailer, banging out a dumpski, in MY bathroom, when my daughter starts to knock on the door, saying “hurry up dad, I gotta go” I say where are you going? No she yells and kicks my door, and says I gotta taking a fucking shit! Hmm, take a shit, that is interesting. Why do we say take a shit. Are you taking the shit somewhere, or from someone. As I sat, my daughter screams thanks I just shit myself. Hey kiddo welcome to my world!
I read about you at the place where white people go to woke their vocab, urban dictionary. Sundays at 9pm were made for catching a glimpse of Jordan Catalano. Saying my name is Jordan Catalano never sounded so woke.
I came up with, what I thought was a great investment opportunity. So yes I shit myself, a little bit, not the whole dump, felt a little wet, something slipped out. Well I went to bed woke up and could smell myself, so I was the shit matted to my asshole hairs, clean up nice! My undies were shit stained I was going to put them back on, but people could probably still smell me. So here is my genius theought, what If there were a spray, perfume, cologne, you could sprey on your dirty undies, take away the smell, and do not harm to you skin! I presented this great story to my daughter. She said why don’t you just change your underwear, put on some clean ones. I did’nt think of that. My daughter is a genuis, great business womean. Check out our latest podcaast Capt tim and the ho
Hi, and welcum to the Capt. Tim Smelliots story. Yes I am trailer park mafia, a tough guy rough hombre, whit tat beings saidd how would you like her up yo asshole
Orgy etiquette. No medical mask required, however perverted mask encouraged. Proof of vax for covid or other std’s not needed. This years orgy will be based on a tango event, more to cum on this later. Bring what you can, orgies can last for days, so any food, drugs or booze. Also music, maybe some vasaline, sex toy, smokes. We have not cum up with a date yet, as my daughter period is cumming up, I am telling her just go with a red tide thing. Yes, this year in light of the covid and such, we are asking people to wash. I myself will be scrubbing down, from right in my asshole and under my balls, you young ladies will have no problem sucking me off. All races welcome, old trailer park hags are welcome, fat ugly white cunts named Karen, well you can cum to. More updates to cum and thanks.
Hmm, orgy huh, sounds fun, I am in!
Hi Liz, and welcum! Yes, the Cocktoberfest is on for the 31, wear a costume if you lick. It will be of course at Mel’s fab trailer park, I will ping you directions if needed. Side note: I have been taking percautionary penacillins to ward off any std, I would suggest you do the same. right now I am peeing good, no burning pain or puss,so cum one cum all to Mels, yes even you fat pig hag Karen, you disgusting cunt
;
I love the smell of cunt in the morning. Smells like an orgy! ITs going down today at Mels, so cum on down
Tim, you sir are a fucking moron! However you do represent low class whites. Yes, what we have is a real live Semi moron. Mustapha Mond would be proud.
ranger/author/nurse/cunt andrea lankford
whore/ slut/ pig////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
I pulled up to a stop light and started to pick my nose, well the lodged in bogger was like a rock stuck in there, saw I went to town, digging in my nose. When I notice these young chicks pulled up next to me, and began filming me. I thought more young chicks checking out hot Capt. TImmy. I put my window down and said hey babe, she starts to laugh and call me a scumbag. Well the snot rocket came out, and I flicked at the little bitch, whose laughing now, you whore. You don,t mess with a Captain.
Pasta primavera all you can eat festival at Mels fab trailer park. Its a time of need, and we help with our free meals, so cum one cum all to mels. Yes I will be the chef! And it wont be pasta primavera but past creamavera! Yes I will be using the cream from my prim pussy as sauce! If a lot of people show up, my pop, will jkerk off all over the pasta, for a really good sauce. Enjly at Mels stinking trailer park, where a bath is not needed!
My pussy my choice
Black door hinges are popular this year
Hey meta how about one of those groovy orgies just asking if