#78 Multilingual Children
February 28, 2008 by clander
All white people want their children to speak another language. There are no exceptions. They dream about the children drifting in between French and English sentences as they bustle about the kitchen while they read the New York Times and listen to Jazz.
As white people age, they start to feel more and more angry with their parents for raising them in a monolingual home. At some point in their lives, most white people attempt to learn a second language and are generally unable to get past ordering in a restaurant or over-pronouncing a few key words. This failure is not attributed to their lack of effort, but rather their parents who didn’t teach them a new language during their formative years.
White people believe that if they had been given French language instruction when they were younger, their lives would have turned out very differently. Instead of living in the US, they would be living and working abroad for the United Nations or some other organization with a headquarters in Switzerland or The Hague.
Generally, white people prefer their children to speak French. Advanced white people will actually spend outrageous amounts of money to send their children to a Lycee or Ecole Francaise. But the vast majority will abandon their dreams when they realize that need a second mortgage so their child can have a better study abroad experience in France.
Languages such as German, Spanish, Swedish, or Italian are also acceptable, but are considered to be poor substitutes (especially Spanish). At the time of writing, it is still considered expert-level white person behavior to have white children speaking Asian and African languages.
There is only one way to use this information to your advantage: speaking another language means that white people are more likely to want to have children with you. It is seen as a cheaper alternative to language schools.
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I think it is great that more white Americans learn a language other than English. Just please don’t but into people’s personal conversations uninvited just to show off your language skills. It’s sooooooooooooooo rude.
No offense but for once can you not refer to every damn thing as white people this and white people that. I mean like we are the only race on this planet that takes interest in other things other then what is predominantly white. Whatever the hell that means lol. The level of your ignorance is beyond description at times but I won’t go there. Coming from one Canadian to the next you give us a bad name but I guess I should be used to it by now as a long time reader.
Anyways you are correct though in some of your observations. I resent the hell out of the fact that most schools only teach English at least until the high school level. Studies have shown that students who study foreign languages for longer periods of time did better on various SAT sub-tests and on the test as a whole then students who studied less foreign language, even when the variable of verbal giftedness was controlled.
Students who take a foreign language in high school scored significantly higher on the verbal portion of the SAT than those who do not. Although this percentage would be much higher if we learned at a much younger age. Personally Spanish is much higher on the list now then it used to be. Having a Hispanic population of over 60 million now. It would be wise for us to have that as part of the school curriculum as a prerequisite.
Likely though it will go on deaf ears. Chinese is another which is gaining popularity and importance but until schools start making it more a focus. I don’t see much changing in the near future. In contrast you look at most schools in Europe and elsewhere which have the knowledge of at least 2-3 languages sometimes more in their repertoire.
This is embarrassing and frankly unacceptable and shows our lack of education in these areas.
Might explain why US is so poor in the public relations department which needs an overhaul. Some people question the importance of why learning a second language is even necessary when English is likely all we will ever need. After all the international language in business is English right. Well that is a bit narrow-minded in that an English speakers ability to speak English doesn’t mean much by itself. A homeless guy on the street may speak English to but a lot of good that does him.
Although ones ability to speak something other then his or her native tongue will open a lot of doors which they otherwise might have not had. So yes you are correct in that observation. Although some do it as a challenge to themselves beyond their own limitations. To prove that they can or to just further their education. All in all though learning any language doesn’t hurt anyone. If nothing else it looks damn good on a resume.
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I love reading these articles because they’re short but inforatmvie.
What did you say? “some hypothetical minority”…ughh. This is why white folks don’t think that Spanish is a worthy language. After all the only ones that speak it are hypothetical minorities and not cultured French folks with beanies and riding a bike with a baguette in a basket. Just the maid and the landscaper speak Spanish right???? I have something to add to that conversation Spanishteen. ” Eres un grandisimo estupido” Now in the words of Antowen Dotson: Run and tell That.
And again, I learned my third and forth languages when I was a kid (I learned English and Spanish simultaneously). So, I was one of those obnoxious polyglot kids, hahahaha.
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