If you find yourself trapped in the middle of the woods without electricity, running water, or a car you would likely describe that situation as a “nightmare” or “a worse case scenario like after plane crash or something.” White people refer to it as “camping.”
When white people begin talking to you about camping they will do their best to tell you that it’s very easy and it allows them to escape the pressures and troubles of the urban lifestyle for a more natural, simplified, relaxing time. Nothing could be further from the truth.
In theory camping should be a very inexpensive activity since you are literally sleeping on the ground. But as with everything in white culture, the more simple it appears the more expensive it actually is.
Camping is a multi-day, multi-step, potentially lethal activity that will cost you a large amount of both time and money. Unless you are in some sort of position where you absolutely need the friendship of a white person, you should avoid camping at all costs.
The first stage of camping always involves a trip to an outdoor equipment store like REI (or in Canada, Mountain Equipment Co-Op). These stores are well known for their abundance of white customers and their extensive inventory of things for white people to buy and only use once. If you are ever tricked into going to one of these stores, you can make white people like you by saying things like “man, this Kayak is only $1200, if I use it 35 times I’ve already saved money over renting.” Note: do not actually buy the kayak.
Next, white people will then take this new equipment and load it into an SUV or Subaru Outback with a Thule or Yakima Roof Rack. Then they will drive for an extended period of time to a national park or campsite where they will pay an entrance fee and begin their journey. It is worth noting that white people are unaware of the irony of using a gas burning car to bring them closer to nature and it is not recommended that you point this out. It will ruin their weekend.
Once in the camp area, white people will walk around for a while, set up a tent, have a horrible night of sleep, walk around some more. Then get in the car and go home. This, of course, is a best case scenario. Worst case scenarios include: getting lost, poisoned, killed by an animal, and encountering an RV. Of these outcomes, the latter is seen by white people as the worst since it involves an encounter with the wrong kind of white people.
Conversely, any camping trip that ends in death at the hands of nature or requires the use of valuable government resources for a rescue is seen as relatively positive in white culture. This is because both situations might eventually lead to a book deal or documentary film about the experience.
Ultimately the best way to escape a camping trip with white people is to say that you have allergies. Since white people and their children are allergic to almost everything, they will understand and ask no further questions. You should not say something like “looking at history, the instances of my people encountering white people in the woods have not worked out very well for us.”
Note: this works for all races!
Stuff White People Like 
First comment! I’m not bragging, I’m just saying.
White people don’t drive SUVs. We’d take a Prius.
Thanks for explaining, in a succinct and humorous way, why camping, in a word, blows. My theory is that any vacation during which you would work harder than you would at home or at your job is not a vacation at all.
Hi honey, i bust my ass all year long and get a whopping 2 week vacay, let’s pretend we’re homeless and camp, we can shit in the woods, bathe in the river, and cook up some doggies by candlelight. How great is dat.
I pooped my pants
You totally skipped the parts about crappy food, impossible-to-assemble tents, mosquitoes, fire-lighting techniques, and what happens when it rains (ie everyone sleeps inside the Subaru). I suspect you’ve never actually been camping.
And Phil: the type of white people who kayak and camp DO own SUVs, but they are small ones and generally Japanese in origin. A Prius will not make it up the steep mountain passes, especially with camping equipment and a Yakima full of kayak on the roof. These types of white people don’t drive their SUVs to work – they are bicycle commuters.
Ta-da! A new entry. Camping? I expected something bad like “female friends” then it would been too controversial. I’m the lucky 7th.
In Wash. state, white people drive past Yakima like it was another Mount St. Helens or confuse it with the closed Hanford Atomic weapons base. Is it became Yakima is 40% Hispanic…or grape vineyards are boring to look at? It’s like Napa, a few organic-eating vegans would camp out there. +
What about all the ridiculously expensive gear? Last time we went camping with white people, there were air mattresses and stainless steel tables and gas grills and tablecloths. None of which we owned. But we did mooch. Oh, how we mooched.
Ahahahahah! This one was wonderful. Also, my garage is full of camping material from REI that I have only ever used once. (Costco or Wal-Mart tents are for ethnic people.) I guess, despite my skin color, I’m WHITE!
I also noticed the first automatically generated Google Ad was for REI. Uncanny, that.
brilliant…can’t believe this wasn’t already an entry!
I love the allergy part. So true!
Besides car camping, here is a page that describes the different types of camping. I found it to be helpful. http://www.picnicplacemat.com/Dry-Camping.htm;l
I was thinking about talking at length about how these issues were addressed in the book “The Dharma Bums” but then I realized how white that would be.
Topic suggestion: Beat poetry
I’m commenting on a blog!
You forgot the part where they visit wineries and take pictures with their $2000 digital SLRs en route.
You also forgot to mention that the wrong kind of white people go camping without gear and drink beer all weekend.
“Roughing it” is only one hooker in junior suite at a four star hotel that only stocks Yellow Label not Grande Dame Veuve Clicquot…
I love doing all those that you mentioned: from being a proud owner of the latest, lightest, and least bulky gear, to trying to stay as far from the mundant city life as possible from every or so weekend trips, BUT I’m NOT white! How would you catergorize me here? A disguised or wannabe white?
And how come the small fridge that can be plugged to the car hasn’t been mentioned?!
I went to camping when I was a kid, and loved it! To be out in the wilderness, except the loud ruckus of Santa Barbara college students in Lake Cachuma in July ’95. We woke up to the sounds of screaming, hollering, sex discussions, foul words and offensive jokes, plus guitar strings surrounded by drunken (or stoned) co-eds in song. A few foreign-language speaking girls walk to and from our tents, therefore me and my bro lost our chance to flirt. +
Correction: walked by our tents, but would stand there and chat about something we can’t translate. I mean, you want campers to stand or hang out by your site? Public county parks are full of crazies and young adult couples moaning through the night … no, really. xD
One type of camping involves a small totevision TV set when analog TV was still around, and battery-powered radios interrupt the peace and quiet (crickets churping). Camping has changed, but why not bask in darkness of the night sky or the sense you’re in one with nature? The point is campers want to spend some time in the wilderness. +
I love camping! It makes you appreciate the convienences of modern life.
I laughed my way through this entire post. I must say, however, my wife is very displeased since she thinks that she will never be able to convince me to go camping with her now that I’ve read it.
Christian – your running commentaries on WASP ( white anglo saxon protestant thing) life always gives me a laugh ! I grew up WASP for the most part I have been delivered Thank the Good Lord. Every now and then myWASP conditioning leaks through. Please coment of these WASP topics : pedigrees and money , pedigrees without money, finding lost “Roots” , the obligatory European trip to the ancestorial home, the money thing and do and don’t when talking about money, white trash vrs other whites, what white do when they find slaves in the family tree , and respect for elders is a factor of how much money you are due to inherit … Cat
All you said is indeed true, yet I must confess camping ROCKS! I don’t know why but I just love camping, the more primitive the better.
Cali-Asian.
We all know what WASP stands for.
You also forgot that they would buy that 2.000$ and only used in automatic setting. If they are “advace” they may use a 60$ Holga to do “lomography” to have a “deeper and more artistic” image of a close up of a flower or some crap like that.
In America, we heard millions of success stories of white European immigrants join the WASP club for 2 centuries, but is it the rule to be born into “old money” at first? The rules seem to bend carefully, like the WASPs just admitted Barak Obama faster than they can admitted 40 million other Black Americans. The WASP can go on about being the 15th generation American in the USA, but I won’t want to share my Anglo-Scottish-Germanic side from the Southeast and Midwest states…to them, besides I’m 50,000th-generation Cherokee, and slavery was practiced among rich Cherokee land owners in Georgia, also I’m aware the tribe allowed some of their own (and captured enemy tribes) into slavery. The Spanish acquired large numbers of American Indian slaves, but the tribes died out and escaped to familiar land to hide, as well the Roman Catholic church condemned the practice of Indian slavery. This is when more Europeans turned to Africa for a new fresh “endless” supply in the early 15th century. I could have “slave blood” in me, but what if it’s a Black/African, despite I hadn’t found any? +
and yet you have no actual comment. GG
You only need about a hundred dollars to go camping. Anyone that has to make a trip to REI before they go camping is a pussy and is not really into camping. Although I am a self described “white person” I find it moronic to have my camping experience mediated through a brand such as REI.
The funny thing is that Yakima Racks is located in Beaverton, Or.
I’m white & live a mile away from REI & I fucking hate camping, except for the drinking bit. But I can do that sans tent because I have a sun room, which is as close to mosquitos as I need to be. FTS.
I had to camp for most of my growing up years. Up and down the East coast on family trips. I refer to it as the “c-word,” and have only been once since married. My darling husband forgot to pack sleeping bags, pillows, etc. I froze my fanny off in the Tenn. mtns., had to listen to raucous Nascar fans and a stray wild turkey all night. I now refuse even though I have sons in Scouts. They can go be “white in the woods” without me! I’m going to plead an allergy from now on. Thanks!
Nail on head without hitting thumb. Let me pray that these folks avoid the places I normally camp. Camping is fun as long as one has the foresight to bring enough beer. Hee Hee… Proud Caucasian.
Where I’m from in Canada, lots of white people go to “the lake” or on farm vacations. Lots and lots of nature, and a great way to one-up a camper.
Nothing worse than waking up with with a sore back and huge morning wood next to the person that wouldn’t shell out $30 for a cheap Wal-Mart tent.
How can camping not be in the Top 10 of ‘Stuff White People Like?”
I grew up in the Caribbean and white people would fly all the way down there and camp on the beaches for weeks on end.
They said they were saving the planet by camping instead of staying in a 5star resort
I love being white! I have never camped out, but after all these wonderfully expressed comments I think I will! wacos!!!!
I am proudly married to a darling redneck. So camping was introduce to me off gate. After 8 years, I still have yet to go. He’s trying to warm me up though…I can sense it. First: we miraculously obtained a perfectly intact, 4 person tent from a “friend”. Second: he bought a 4wheeler, turned my daughters into finatics…as well as me, & has now embeded a “4wheeler path” through the woods in our side yard. Third: his punk a$$ buddies are now asking me if we’d be interested in going with them and their spuses to this so-called hot spot for 4wheeling & camping.
I am…afraid.
There are many types of white people that can be found camping – the RV crowd, the REI types (as mentioned) but don’t forget about the white people who are traveling and are too cheap to get a hotel room. These white people are typically quite friendly, especially if you let them eat all your food.
http://www.stuffwhitechristianslike.com
I do run in the opposite direction when I see white people of the woods. History & movies have taught me that absolutely nothing good can come of it.
Yakima, Washington. The city.
I think many white, inexperienced campers/mountain climbers/campers get Orvis Fever. Many Mt. Hood deaths point to inexperienced climbers taking on the mountain in WINTER. Those yuppies in the catalog sure look sharply dressed and happy, though.
Camping tip 1: Learn how to fight a wild animal (i.e. bear) with your bare hands and it may impress your girlfriend. But she reaches out for the trail mix and the bear goes for it. Men=muscle, women=brains and bears=wild animal. +
Oh my goodness. That’s my childhood right there. I am soooo white. I always wanted to stay in motels or RVs with all the wrong kind of white people but instead we had to set up tents and gas stoves and I had to pretend I was having a good time so my mom would flip out less… Sooo accurate.
Just when I thought this site couldn’t get any more ingenious at exposing white life to the world…
This is on point! One of your best posts of all.
I need to go camping: to up my whiteness level
Addendum to the being killed part.
If the white person is really lucky, then a book will be written conjecturing their disappearance and/or death that will THEN be made into a dramatic film taking many liberties with the plot, staring a famous white celebrity that vaguely resembles the actual missing and/or killed white person, and that only white people will watch. (Note: see Into the Wild). This is the highest form of respect that can be honored to a white camper.
We camped a few times with a good white group from church. Fun outings but……you have to be really creative to clandestinely quaff an ale with a church group.
We had a good tent that now rests peacefully in daughter’s family garage, so her gang now uses it. Wife and I like this arrangement.
this is funny! I find it true tho. hahhaha.
Are biodiesel burning Earth Roamers equipped with solar panels and wine racks exempt?They’re not really RVs.
As Dave Barry once said, “Camping is nature’s way of promoting the motel business.”
This was super funny because I’ve been whining for three weeks about how much I want to go camping.
My friend just ditched my other friend, who had flown in for two weeks from Australia and hardly ever visits, because she hadn’t got the chance to camp yet all summer. Friend from Australia? Pissed. I took Australia Friend to Portland and we camped in a hotel. Much better, and no hiking required.
Thule racks may have something of an upper hand on Yakima, because they’re (supposely) a Swedish company, which brings in the whole Ikea/Sweden connection. And they’re silver-finished which makes them seem more expensive and complicated, even though they’re basically crap. White people with Yakima racks are the ones who are more likely to use them often, own any vintage of Subaru Outback, be vegan and bike-commute. They definitely have the upper hand in making non-campers feel like piles of crap for not getting out and enjoying nature… I don’t know if this makes them officially whiter than the Thule people who are more what the writer is describing above. It’s a conundrum. Thule people more than likely have an unused, empty rack on their (obviously pristine) Beemer or Audi because they think it makes them looks cool and “outdoorsy.” Just my 2¢
I’ll never forget when I learned the hard way how much white people really love camping…
Yuppie co-worker: “Me and some others are heading up north for our annual taste of fine nature, care to come along and get in touch with mother earth?”
Me: “Hell no, my parents didn’t immigrate to this country just to have them or their kids spend another damn night in the wilderness.”
We are no longer on speaking terms.
hahaha I love camping…
I second the need for an item on poetry, but not Beat Poetry, Poetry Slams, whatever they are.
And Slavoj Žižek
I agree! I hate camping. We have a group of about 40 friends who used to be in a baby-sitting co-0p in LA and used to do an annual camp-out at a beach on 4th of July weekend.
Even though we moved away, we often joined them. But after several years, we stopped trying to do the camping because my back went out every time I tried to sleep on the ground. So we had a 20th reunion last year, and we stayed in a motel. Very nice to come home to a clean shower that doesn’t require quarters and sleep in a clean bed!
about a month ago my buddy got bit by a copperhead while we were camping. he spent the two nights in the hospital while i camped alone. WIN!
mooching rocks, just mooch the supplies off of one of those imebelic trustfunders: all these dumb white people buying their REI, REO “gear” whatever, to use once and that’s it. WHO in their right mind goes camping for a vacations–stinking from lack of showers, not eating normally, crapping in the woods, shivering the whole night through–HOMELESS vacation. i think they have yuppy camping trips but it is still pathetic, no one with an IQ above 45 voluntarily goes camping.
I camped near Yakima in Ellensburg recently to float down the canyon river. It was quite fun. Camping is only terrible if you are not properly prepared (like many of my friends weren’t).
RV the movie is on TBS at the very moment when I wrote this…is an example of how white people love camping. All about business, the kind of vacations white people have. +
Camping in Indian territory….
What can be more whitey than that?
Uhmmm, er, besides TAKING INDIAN TERRITORY!
I hate to try camping in organized camping spots.
Usually too many rude drunks.
Love this! I am totally avoiding going camping with my sister and her family right now so I don’t have to go buy more damn gear.
LOL. Great post! My comment doesn’t fit here…
funny picture worth checking out regarding the lack of running water:
http://inkstainedcanvas.blogspot.com/2009/08/stuff-white-people-like-128-camping.html
Hilarious. The quip about RVs was funny, but the quip about needing government assistance in a rescue and the possibility of a documentary on the experience is outright the funniest thing this blogger has ever written.
Christian, if you’re reading this, please note that the white-people-prestige of government rescue while outdoors does not apply to icefishers stuck on breakaway ice flows on the Great Lakes. I’m sure Canadians like you are familiar with this. Besides, the wrong kind of white people stuck on the ice flows should have known better, what with them causing Global Warming with the RV driving and all!!! LOL.
Yes, I am aware of that. Yakima the city is where I was born and raised before moving to Seattle for college and then to Portland where I currently reside.
Did you miss the Katrina coverage? Black people *galore* camping.
You do know how to spin a tale!
Camping is just a form of “slumming it,” an age-old favorite pastime of the light-hued.
My husband tried to bring up camping and I refused to go then and I refuse to go now.
For me a vacation is supposed to be an escape from the cooking, clean and house drudgery I do at home.
I don’t see how moving my housework to the great outdoors is supposed to be restful.
My husband was an “outdoorsman” from Palo Alto CA. Once I knew he was The One, I had to go camping. After we were married I told him “if there aren’t heated towel bars, it’s camping. Never again.”
Maybe one of these days he’ll go hiking along the Appalachian Trail!
This is great because I just went whitewater rating in MA, and I was surprised that not a single person there aside from my boyfriend wasn’t blindingly white (well, a lot of people were tan, but you get it)
Up until I read this, I never actually thought about that. As an Asian kid growing up in the suburbs, I was always told of these “allergies” by school kids but I had no idea what they were talking about. Now come to think of it, they were all told to me by white kids.
the last line is my favourite. narrowly beating the bit about the kayak
This made me laugh, because, well, I’m a partially white person who actually likes camping (guess that makes me a masochist?) but does not like the expensive paraphernalia that comes along with it.
Except for water purification systems, I’ll admit those are nifty.
The avoidance of nature by black people, is it a rejection
of their ancestral outdoors roots?
A lack of income to buy the required parafernalia
to go camping?
Is it true that no turf grows where these ethnics inhabit?
just a head’s up – in the first paragraph you have “worse case scenario” instead of “worsT”
Transcendental, If I may observation!
My IQ is well over 100 and I LOVE camping. My most expensive piece of camping “equipment” is a sleeping bag that I’ve had for fifteen years. The point is to GET AWAY FROM people. Things make a lot more sense when Mother Nature is in charge.
Hear, hear!
Yes One time I dated a white guy that dumped me because I didn;t want to go camping with him and his friends LOL. Sorry I just couldn’t do it. HIS LOSS LMAO!
Awww…Camping is for everybody but I just can;t do it! lol
Let me tell you something, Franklin. As a Black man with a Hispanic wife and two children, we don’t avoid camping as a rejection of ancestral roots…for me, Black people originating in Africa didn’t all necessarily sleep in the woods (ever heard of Egypt?) As far as a lack of income, I don’t believe the recession only affects Black people, so at this point in time that statement really doesn’t make any sense either. As for us “ethnics”, most of us think camping is just…dumb. And it’s true, no turf grows where “ethnics inhabit”, which for me is a mixed bag of blacks, whites, hispanics and whoever else bought a home in this suburb. Imagine that, I’m Black and have never lived anywhere that had bullet shells and crack vials on the ground, and you actually have to drive a bit to get to the church or liquor store…neither of which I frequent.
As for you, I invite you to go camping in a little spot I know called hell. Pack accordingly buddy.
As for the post itself, hilarious. My sister-in-law, her daughter and her boyfriend have gone camping twice in the past month…I know have proof that they are slightly crazy. They didn’t buy any supplies, by the way.
“now” have proof I mean. And hey Antipasta Cajun or whatever your name is, I see your hispanic also…I just read your little blog about bushes and plants and shit. Just so you know since you want to make the little “ethnic” comments…there’s no post about white people actually liking “the amigos” either on here unless it’s Tuesday…the day y’all come around in my neighborhood with the riding lawnmowers and cut everybody’s grass. I’m still trying to figure out how my hispanic neighbors have eighteen people living in their house but nobody’s cut the grass in three months though. Why, isn’t that what “you all” do for a living?
Fucking amazing.
Camping is definitly a white thing. I would say its more of a wealthier white thing. Poor white people don’t call it camping. They just call it surviving.
Its funny how we want to experience homelessness for fun. But only for a weekend. More than that and it starts to get to real.
Don’t forget the antimosquito repellants with worries on the west nile virus. Or live by a vacated home with a back yard pool in the hot Cal. desert…perfect for breeding the west nile virus. I wonder white people are immune to the very presence of insects’ bites (i.e. “dirty” house flies). But it’s all natural and the bugs may be endangered species, don’t swat it…you break natural (and federal) laws.+
What….no pilates on the list? Child please.
Cracks me up, but this is so true! I’ve hiked and camped all my life and never ran into any other races out on the trails. Well, sometimes Asians with cameras, but never with full packs. Maybe being way up in the Northwest has something to do with it, there just isn’t that much racial diversity outside of the metro areas.
Camping is like pretending you’re homeless.
The allergy part was hilarious. The whole article was dead on. It is highly recomended that you don’t camp in the Everglades National Park unless you want to be actually consumed by mosquitoes. Still, I know many Floridians who love going there, some White, some Hispanic.
http://www.poeticmotherlover.com
I remembering commenting to a White Person that I was going camping, and where, and got this: “Oh, car camping can be fun sometimes.” Implying that if you’re not carrying all your shit on your back and hiking somewhere, you’re not really camping. I don’t really call that camping, I call it The Infantry, and have done plenty of it.
You said it: city parks are places for the “Urban pioneer”. The transient workers may spend more than 10 hours in the outdoors, but can’t afford a home…or move in with 6 guys in some man’s garage. This was the case of my Mom’s neighbor 2 houses down…they paid rent to live together in a garage. The owners moved out since then, then came the stripping out of copper wiring to sell for cash and finally… that house facing the river bed had a few middle school kids hang out there on the afternoons. +
Loved this post. I’ve always wondered what somebody who lives in some Third-World shit-hole thinks when they hear that some Americans for recreation and relaxation try to live like they do for a couple days or more and pay money to do it.
What else do white people love while camping? Breaking out the bong. Not since Jerry died have so many white people taken to the woods and baked themselves silly around the campfire.
I went camping with my family in Massechuttes a few years back, beautiful state camping ground, completley empty aside from us and the Hispanic family who were right next door. They proceeded to play loud music all night and refused to turn it down. The people in charge of the camping ground refused to intervene. Foolishly they left their cooking pots out all night and the squirrels took their revenge and made a god almighty mess! I got bitten by a tick (right on my behind!). My sister in law had an argument with the lifeguards at the lake – they were ordering her out of the water due to lightning (miles away, not even close). The called the State Troopers. Despite all of this, we did enjoy ourselves…
Black people like living in Third-world shit-holes.
I have actually witnessed diverse races camping when I go. But it is true that White people prefer it much more. Hell, we just do it to get away and get totally drunk to where you don’t really care where you end up passing out. >.>
Some of my favorite past times are camping and we are anything but white. Why do we all have to stereotype each other….Ive read some really negative comments. The world is ours to share. Its better to learn from each other than to criticize that which we dont understand.
Ice “floe.”
White as hell. You had to a) custom order that shit $$$ and b) it makes you look better than less-advanced white people.
I am one of the few white people in my circle of friends and family that hates camping. I will never see it as a vacation, spending hours setting up tents and supplies and building fires just to tear it all down a day or two later will never be relaxing to me. I get roped into camping with friends and my in laws several times a year and I just can’t stand it.
I love camping. I mentioned this to a friend from Lebanon. He said: “where I come from, we do not call people in tents ‘campers’, we call them ‘refugees'”.
Oh please, it’s called satire.
You enjoyed Katrina too!
Only white people would pretend to be homeless.
I think the key to enjoying camping is doing it in support of a worthwhile objective. If you just bed down in the nearest stand of woods it probably won’t be much fun, but if you’re trying to climb a particular mountain it’s a bit more exciting.
This comment caused me to laugh so hard that coffee shot out of my nose. Not a good feeling. But a really funny comment
How very white of you
Nice! My brother and best best friend are always trying to get me to go camping, talking about communing with nature and everything like that. All I can think about is getting eaten by a bear. How stupid would that be to spend your vacation getting eaten by a bear?!?
Read the blog, Dumb Assed Kitchen
priceless. xD
isn’t that the truth xD
Read number 99 on this list of Stuff White People Like.
Hows the people with their caravans and satelite dish, tv, the parrot and pot plant.
cant seem to get away from home after all.
People that go with caravans are the wrong kind of white people.
That was awesome
Also, this intails potential food poisoning as you have to cook all of your meals in the woods and try to keep in cold in the cooler thus avoiding salmonella from burgers cooked over the fire. Then there is the cleaning up after a meal when camping and getting water and hanging things to dry…I HATE CAMPING!!!
I work really hard so that I DON”T havev to sleep on the ground like a homeless person, duh!
Fine if you don’t want to go camping, that’s your choice, but then how will you know what to do with all that duct tape, canned goods and firearms that Americans love to stock up on for the always-impending terrorist threat that you’re obsessed about?
An enlightening fact for you: there aren’t killer bears covering every square inch of the world.
Lastly, I always find it interesting that white people seem to be the only race you can be prejudice against (in an article like this) without getting into any trouble.
as a tee shirt I saw a young middle-eastern looking fellow in the check-out line at REI Berkely last autumn 2008 said:
Whity will pay (with little stick figures)
comfortable in his hate speech while shopping at REI
I would of asked him about it but I was with my 4 year old.
Wrong kind of white people.
This entry is rather timely.
Yosemite Park ranger asks: Where are the black visitors?
Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/08/09/MNF31926R7.DTL#ixzz0OSvfQj9O
The best part of the article are the comments from the California Rednekkks.
—
And I’ll answer the question… the reason black folks don’t camp is because we know the Klan holds their meetings in the woods. Y’all already tricked us into getting on the boat.
Y’all ain’t getting us out into the woods and force us to do lord knows what to god knows who.
The way most people typically “go camping” is pretty lame and does seem like more work than pleasure. However, being lucky enough to grow up in Montana where didnt have to drive for hours and pay entry fees to go camping, I find it rather enjoyable. However, I have never owned a sleeping bag or tent and never will. All it takes is your buddies, a 30 rack of a keystone light, a fishing pole and the clothes on your back. Remember, you cant call it camping if you have to pay for firewood that you will later burn in the forest.
very timely considering steve sailers ‘the unbearable whiteness of ken burns’ article in taki mag (about his swpl approach to his national parks doc)
I’d just like to note for the record that I do not take a motor vehicle with me when I go camping. seems to kinda defeat the purpose, and they get stuck too easily. All my gear easily fits on my bike.
You, your buds, some brew, all under the stars… feeling natural.
Sounds like the makings of a great blockbuster movie.
😉
… as the REI 9-person tent inhabitants who didn’t drink nearly as much as you did prance around the campsite making a shitty breakfast as soon as the sun rises marveling how great it is to be out-of-doors. Why are the birds so LOUD ???
this post was almost funny. dont try so hard next time.
FYI, I live in a latrine. I mean, while I do love the smell of my own nightsoil, I like to quaff it with a roof over my head.
Rex, have you checked every square inch of the world?
I’d just like to point out that rain is not a pleasant experience when camping no matter who you are or where you come from.
“Blindingly,” huh? Doesn’t sound very pleasant.
when some people can’t think of anything intelligent to say, they make fun of someone else. that appears to be “almost”s theory below. how original. thanks for coming out ‘almost’, we’ll give you a call
to Christopher J Hite: i love camping but you are correct, camping in the rain ALWAYS sucks.
Don’t forget the Teva sandals and the $200 waterproof hiking boots, even though most white people can barely walk from their car to their tent without getting winded.
Camping, yes. Yoga? Come on.
And, you don’t have downhill skiing in your list? You’re a good writer, but you’re missing the mark.
Snow sports was already mentioned. Try reading the site.
Just LOL! This one is too funny, and so true!
Whoever loves camping in the wilderness oughta go to the KOA camps (are they still around?) or a state-highway rest stop, except white people want to be on camp sites and definitely never stop in “run down” rest stops. +
…Not if you are one of the few white people (or any people) who know how to correctly pitch a tent. 🙂
Yeah STAGOLEE……you would think of Brokeback Mountain…….Your sick. You probably dream about that movie.
I am white and I hate the idea of camping. So do my white friends. This one I just don’t see.
Not showering for three days + living with other people who haven’t showered for three days = not a good weekend.
Checkout my boobs on my homepage!
National Parks released this week that less than 1% of African-Americans visit U.S. National Parks. This was released in connection with the Obama’s trip to Yellowstone last week. Even the Obama’s did not decide to camp out.
What about camping/outdoor experiences with kids to take them back to nature….
Brilliant! Brilliant!! Why did this post take so long to appear?! Keep it coming!! Can you post something about hipsters please!!!
If you are seen using cheap camping equipment (from wal-mart, army surplus, etc.), then white people will want to give you some of their food.
Ha, this amused me because I’ve been wondering why “allergies” didn’t have a whole post all to itself. Lactose intolerance is so over. Now, it’s all about gluten intolerance. You’re so not cool if you’re still eating wheat.
Puke.
Actually I have nightmares about the time I had to blow yo’ mama’s back out. 😛
i have flatulence, does that count as a white excuse not to go play homeless?
Or a few whiny white wussys shout “I’M DIABETIC” in some manic-panic mode. I mean, what is your excuse? Camping is terrible for white people’s skin: try to camp in Joshua Tree National Park in the Cal. desert, and fair skin burns in 30 minutes. YYYOOOWWW! Don’t forget the T.P. or you’ll have to wipe with leaves, but make sure it’s not poison oak. +
yes
Ahh yes. Just planning a camping trip to San Onofre State Beach. And of course we’ll be packing the Trader Joe goods and Carne Asada for grilling! Take that whitey!!
Um, they are kind of all about hipsters.
Super-duper white.
Nailed it! GlutenGlutenGluten!
Who wants to camp near a nuclear power plant? Are the eco-freaks usually white people? Good luck and don’t glow all night…or wake up the next day to find you grown a tail. +
Homies don’t camp out because they are afraid of snakes (and dogs, etc, etc,). Plus they sort of camp out when their water and electricity gets cut off every month.
natch
Welcome back, asshole.
more like neo-hippies
What about camping/outdoor experiences with kids to take them back to nature…..
If white people ran this site there would be a share on FaceBook button for the camping article and or all other articles about what white people like.
come now – a lake or farm vacation one-upping a camper? not by a long shot, mountie. if you told me you were paddling the boundary waters or hiking the pct solo for the summer, you might have a case. but visiting cottage country on weekends from Toronto doesn’t count.
ah stagolee. how’ve ya been all these months?
sorry to differ with you straight away, but I have to correct the record here: while it’s indeed true that white people collected slaves, and in just about every instance were the money-men at the end of the line in the Americas, it is nonetheless unequivocally true that black folks did a whole lot of the tricking and kidnapping of their own people themselves.
and let’s not pretend that slavery didn’t exist before whitey came along.
now that’s just off the mark writerx, and I have to wonder if you’ve been paying attention. have you ever been to a marathon? you’ll have your assortment of east africans, one of whom will go on to win, but the vast majority of the remainder are white folks who’ve dedicated countless hours and dollars to the event. this goes doubly for bike races or triathlons (without, of course, the presence of east africans). fitness pursuits – borne of free time and even more money – are an absolutely integral component of the white culture lampooned here.
it troubles me to have to explain this at such a late stage.
I’ll give you one fucking guess as to why you “just don’t see” this one, trip. do you even read the site?
The only time I would go camping is if I were in a gigantic RV with a shower and a toilet. To hell with this roughing it nonsense. I did enough of that with my cheap-ass parents growing up.
My RV would also have to include a satellite dish, a DVR and a high quality stereo so I can be constantly entertained.
Oh, I almost forgot — I would absolutely have to have a reliable internet connection, many so I could check on my investments and make trades if necessary.
Finally, the camping site has to have a good cell phone signal so I can stay in touch with my friends.
I was watching a house hunter like show on HGTV (House Hunters should be a Thing White People like…). Anyway, this guy on the show lives in a tent for 3 months of the year. I was soooo jealous. How can I compete with that? When I am at a party I would love to say “I don’t like to confine myself to monthly rent payments. The open road is my apartment.” I fucking hate that guy. However, I could never actually live in a tent. Isn’t there a way I can live in a nice house, but still feel woodsy and close to earth?
If you really want to impress the white people, claim you’re into “ultralight.” This will imply purchasing even more expensive and fragile equipment and have an otaku like knowledge of the weights of everything which will allow for a one-up-manship game of the kind they like: “Well dude, now that i got those carbon-fiber trekking poles and wipe my butt with rocks, my base weight is down to 5.6375 pounds!”
This is the best SWPL post ever written. Brilliant. And dead-on, unfortunately.
This is great, and it literally coincided with me taking my in-laws (who are not white) camping for the first time last weekend.
hahahah. too true, too effin true.
haaha, that is soo funny, and true. Although i am white! And my husband,me and my son went camping in a tent and slept pretty good, and only spent about 35 bucks on the whole trip! So goes to prove Some WHITE people can camp the good old way! 🙂
OMG! I almost pee’d my hemp underpants. This is so true. I am not White, but my Brother-in-law(hell) is and this is his thing. Love to one up him by telling him I got new bike parts that weigh absolutely nothing. Just reducing my carbon footprint…..
I am a white person who HATES camping. Every couple of weeks my white mother in law calls and tries to set up a camping trip. She states how much my children enjoy camping and when should we plan the next trip? I say, You can take them camping. So far I have used “I don’t camp with children in diapers” but in the next couple of years this will no longer work. My husband even secretly admitted to me that he prefers staying in a cheap hotel room near the wilderness and hiking during the day but coming back to a restaurant meal and a clean bed. How am I going to get out of camping in a couple of years?!?! What can my excuse be? Perhaps and allergy to campfire smoke? hmmm…….
haha, let’s pack up volvo with whole foods rip off crap and load up on the REI/REO overpriced junk to pretend we’re homeless for long weekend!! woo, woo, woo, woo==dumb whites.
This is funnier than hell.
Last week my friend went camping and left the sunroof to the Volvo *wide* open. Throughout the night, a family of racoons dined on gourmet blueberry muffins, and other high end organic Whole Food bakery goods. The family spent another $300 dollars having a professional detailer clean up the interior mess.
black people camp just in a different way, than whites. They just set out on their front porch all day and half the night with 30 or 40 of their friends and neighbors drinking malt liquor, and smoking weed, until one shoots another and the law breaks their outing up, when do they work?
An RV would be all right, except for the gas cost. See them all over the place despite this. Heard too many bear horror stories about bears sniffing around the tent as one sleeps looking for food, bears breaking windows of trucks. That Timothy Treadwell (sp?) guy was wacked out, even if he was White.
Lots of people sleep on the beach in the dunes, and have permanent ‘camp-out’ sites out there, but I think some of them are homeless. Camping sounds fun in theory, and it can’t be that much worse than sleeping in one’s car, which I’ve done-but the no real bathroom, mosquitoes and animals creeping around factor doesn’t seem fun at all.
By the way, I don’t consider sleeping in an RV camping. Especially if you bring along a satellite dish, flatscreen, and microwave.
Check out my boobs on my homepage.
For white people, replace “weed” with “crystal meth”.
I saw this site on comedy centrals funniest with http://www.DanielDickey.com and I now see why the both tied as the funniest sites on the web.
This entry is brilliant as are most of them. Truth and direct experience elevate the humor. You might consider a future entry about what white people like and make the subject “Landscape Photography” I am a landscape photographer and a vast majority of the people who purchase and license my work are white. I think it is part of the whole white people becoming one with nature. If you ever do a “Landscape photography” entry, I can provide the images. Great work as always.
The comments on this entry are funny and well-written and even polite. Is Christian moderating the comments now? Most of the comments on the older entries were batshit crazy.
White peepul got purty mouths … mmmmmmmmm … purty
Yep… This is the first entry that I can say that I don’t relate to the side of the white person. Why people would ever subject themselves to sleeping on the ground for any reason is beyond me.
It does give people a chance to justify their North Face gear, too.
This could have been alot funnier…
I’m wid you on that one, bro.
After busting my ass at work, when I take a vacation I want to have a certain minimum level of comfort, and camping just doesn’t cut it. I’m more of a Four Seasons hotel kinda guy.
BTW, I am white.
Be sure to show off your custom made cooking stove that weighs 0.015 ounces and runs on carbon-neutral, multi-use grain alcohol. But under no circumstances tell them that you made it out of beer cans and epoxy because the white people will think you’re either a survivalist or a make-your-own-gear enthusiast, neither of which you want to be associated with.
Try jenny craig you fat cunt
Damn!! I hate being “the wrong type of white camper.” I love showing up and drinking beer all day and passing out in someone’s lawn chair. No wonder I have no black friends…
What’s all this bullshit about? I do a lot of hunting, fishing, along with camping, and have done it all my life. I haven’t found it to be very expensive and have had a ton of pleasure and enjoyment over the years. You posers who think you know what it is all about simply have your head up a very dark place. Those of you who have all the spendy stuff are simply misguided in your thinking that spending bunches of money makes it better. The less junk you have will equal more fun. You eastern big city types need to get a life.
Wow! kemah ya…! bagus nih…
Fauzan NR [ fhom.blogspot.com ]
Bagoes!
Fauzan NR [ fhom.blogspot.com ]
Kang… saya tunggu kunjungannya…Ok?
Fauzan NR [ fhom.blogspot.com ]
O’ya ada yang kelupaan, saya orang indonesia… Kenal Indonesia?
Fauzan NR [ fhom.blogspot.com ]
yeah but that’s the wrong kind of white person
yeah , nature should be protected but enjoyed from the comfort of my couch in the a.c. watching a nature show, with my own clean bathroom, no mosquitos, not sweating like a pig and eating nasty food made over a campfire!
Your mom is a man too, whats your point? Guess you mistaked her for dear ol mommy eh M.O.I.A.M?
Put alil love in your heart
🙂
Clander, I heart you! Another hilarious post!
Actually, this is a rarely told secret, but the REAL reason ‘we’ like camping so much is because people like ‘you’ aren’t there.
I make my own pop-can alcohol stoves, but I don’t use epoxy. I build them press-fit, which is master technique.
All the weight is in the pot-stand anyway.
It’s possible to pitch a tent so that your stuff doesn’t wet, but camping in the rain is no fun even in a trailer. It has to do with being stuck in a tiny room with people you’ve grown to hate, while your precious vacation days are blown away because all your planned activities are outdoors.
More like his gain – he narrowly avoided living with someone who hates the activities he loves. Also, he dumped a girl who types like a retard.
I think you maybe right, it may come out on Oprah, who also maybe a fat little man.
Who are these black people you speak of? I am out working all day, and I do not see any of them. Are these the afro people who fill the jails and prisons?
And how about waking up in the morning at a campsite? After a restless night of sleep, and then no bathroom to wash up and comb their hair, everyone looks like a zombie.
All Rex must do to validate his point is check one single square inch of the world and reasonably prove there are not killer bears there, the remaining space is irrelevant.
logic fail
Hey, I just found something so WHITE it’s GREEN: The Eco-Friendly Phone! I kid you not; the website is here:
http://green.sprint.com/reclaim.php?&id9=Ad_2009q3_green_reclaim_frog_300x250
It’s called the “Reclaim” from Sprint, and it’s the Toyota Prius of cellphones. It’s made from 80% recycled equipment. It bills itself as the “eco-friendly, socially conscious, always networking phone.”
It’s too bad it’s too small to put an Obama sticker on it. Maybe you could put an Obama Screensaver on it, though.
bahahaha I’ve always loved how white people spend thousands of dollars to live like a hobo for a week… its kinda ironic
i guess there really is no place like home…
I’m all for mooching
I compromise and drive my Vespa
I camp often and I agree with everything in this post. I have a cheap tent and cook over a fire. I don’t spend hardly anything and I laugh at all the ridiculous gadgets campers buy. Camping is, or should be, cheap.
I nearly chocked on my orange juice reading this! Dude, you are freaking hilarious! Your last sentence is pure comedy! Keep up the good work, this site is locked in my favorites from now on!
Thanks again for another amazing post. You continue to make me laugh and provide inspiration for me to make http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com funnier! Keep it up!
RV’s. I have never seen anyone other than a white person with an RV.
I have heard that Clarence Thomas has an RV, but I won’t believe it ’til I see it.
Thank you! Camping is truly the curse of the white man and should be avoided at all costs. I don’t understand how sleeping on rocks and being blown away by torrential rain is fun. I’m white and I don’t get it.
Your kind of white sucks. You’ve missed out on a lot. Then again, you’re a whiner and who would want you around?
Hey Philly, how many dicks did you have in your mouth when you wrote that. I bet you had a whooooole lot of em.
put alil love in your heart
🙂
Once when I was a kid, I asked my dad why we never went camping like the white kids in my class. His response? “Why would I sleep in a tent when I have a HOUSE? I don’t spend money every month on a mortgage and utilities to waste it by sleeping outside on the ground. I have a mattress in my house.”
Yet another great post.
If you guys out there are looking for another humor site to read, check out http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com. It’s similar to the Onion.
I think about this every time I go camping right after dusk, knowing that there’s nothing left to do but I’ll still be up for another three hours, and wake up tired dirty and cold, and somehow I was looking forward to this. Things could always be worse. I could in fact run into the wrong kind of white people.
I think about this every time I go camping right after dusk, knowing that there’s nothing left to do but I’ll still be up for another three hours and will wake up tired dirty and cold, and somehow I was looking forward to this.
Yeah SHOULD be cheap! My local camping store has more posh toffs than camping stools! Most of the blokes are called Rupert…
watch the soloist and live amongst the skidrow people in LALA land. that all the dumb whites can drive up in their volvos, crunching on trader hoes/whore foods rip off snacks, and sipping on bottled water, they can bring their REO/REI overpriced camping crap and join in for some good skidrow fun— and get down with the peeps. then after 2 jolly-good days, then can race back to brentwood–shower, spa, massage, and of course a 5 dollar weak latte. sounds like white fun!
I must be the wrong kind of white person because I can’t wait to buy an rv. I hate sleeping on the ground, being without running water, electricity or, most importantly, a toilet.
Hey…just like living in a third world country or in the rural parts of Eastern Europe (or in Appalachia for that matter). But why is it rich white folk want to get “with it” in nature and free of material possessions…by going on a campout for the weekend? If the economy keeps going downhill, they may well live without the basic necessities. +
I don’t get the camping thing. A hike and then back to the hotel is my idea of fun.
Check out my cute hipster cartoon fisheggs picture #35. If you like leave comment at site. Thanks!
Great post, laughing my butt off…
I think you just found another blog follower. Your bookmarked.
😀
alot of these dumb whites may indeed be living the homeless life after we hit the depression in 2010.
I like turtles.
I like turtles!
OWNED BY ASHLEY!!! also, I LIKE TURTLES
Bah – we as a white, middle 30’s, childless couple like to tell stories to our super radiant white friends about the horrors of looking for water in streams on a 5 day remote hike… and how we are prepared to (but have yet to actually do) carry our poo around in purpose build plastic tubes….
… and the joy of not showering for days while eating spam and noodles…
…none of it seems to get my white brothers and sisters interested until I tell them that my hiking shoes are $500 (important to let them know how serious I am about shoe technology – and how much it costs).
On finding that out there will always be one who just HAS to have a pair like mine – or the next model up because “if I’m going to do it, I want the right gear” thus bringing competition into the discussion…
…the fact that the next model up from my shoes are mountaineering ones and would be as useful as ski boots on a flat walk doesn’t seem to bother them.
THEN I mention the tiny coffee peculator I hike with in order to make my cup of free trade each day, and the conversation takes more rapturous leaps into hiking as an environmental protest.
All of them go in to training for some hell hike that 1% of the world can achieve… like base camp for instance.
This spurt of energy may last until football season, when mystery “old injuries” move training from out doors to anywhere there is a Chardonnay and someone to listen to the disappointment they feel about their dream being cruelly taken from them by injury.
A dream that they have had forever… or at least since last week.
aSIAN WOMEN ARE ALLERGIC TO ASIAN MEN! GOOD LUCK DATING!! MAYBE SOME SUPER UGLY NASTY TRAILER PARK LADY who EVEN black guys pass on will go out with you!!
Sleepy, two words: Lighten Up.
Damn, I guess I’m not white after all! I hate camping with a fiery passion. My idea of roughing it is running out of coffee when the store is closed and having to make do with tea.
Now if only I could do something about this pasty skin tone of mine.
Ahem, I think you mean “YOU’RE bookmarked”… As in “you are”. Proper grammar is a must.
“Mistaked”????? That’s not even a word you tool.
white people are puusy’s!
You really should do one on medical experts… white people LOVE having an expert diagnose every little cough/scratch/bruise. And getting second opinions.
Nope, tell that to the survivalists and militias running loose in the Idaho mountains belonging to Christian Identity or the Aryan nations. Armed with AK-47s, sub-machines, semi-autos and uzis out of the US army depots, these white men in the hills are ready for armageddon with the NWO. +
I see it coming, tag. By 2010 or later, we’re all gonna be a real-life “Mad Max” film. Motorcycle thugs and punks ride the roads in the American desert, a battle over who has the most…oil, water, food or gold supplies (whatever), when these commodities (food or water are a necessity) are in short supply. In the movie, the world was devastated by nuclear war and dwindling basics for the remainder of mankind to live on. +
You are seriously hilarious.
these white boys are in need of a penis, unfortunately many have weak father figures, so they are wimps, metrosexuals and are overly sensitive. they need a penis/testicles.
you should learn how to correctly spell words….
If you want to be correct grammatically you would write, “you are”; contractions are not allowed in proper English usage.
That’s why I live on beer and pretzels.
Many people have probably said this already, but a good addition to the list “Stuff White People Like” would be the SWPL site itself.
“Many people have probably said this already, but a good addition to the list “Stuff White People Like” would be the SWPL site itself.”
So true. I’m actually going on a camping trip next weekend and just dropped $400 at REI. It’s like you guys are in my head.
I love this site.
Contractions are not cool in formal written work, but are just fine informally and in speech. Grammar pwnage fail.
No kidding.
They make more money than you and your whole race of mongrels combined.
Hook, line, and sinker! Fishing on the internet is fun!
Yeah I’m one of those campers that just sits around and drinks beer all day. I’m starting to realize that I enjoy the WKOWP’s company more than the ones who relate to this site. Maybe it’s just the Northern’s I can’t stand. Damn yankees. Well I guess someone has to buy into to all this shit or else those companies that use those little catch words wouldn’t have anyone to extort. I’m so much better than you deal with it.
The problem is you guys don’t have fathers that stick around. Deal with it were better than you.
This is so true. If you ever go to a camp site, it is 99% white people. I am white, but think camping is way too much work for it to be fun.
The part about having to go to the right store (REI, or Mountain Co-op) is true. The only Mountain Co-op I know of is in Toronto. White people drive miles to get to this place. They can’t just go to the local sporting goods store, or Wal-mart, no, they have to go to Mountain Co-op and pay twice as much for the same camping crap they would buy at a normal store.
I did do a lot of camping when I was young, but this was just so I could drink large quantities of alcohol without my parents around.
Also here is what happens when you spend a night in a tent. First you are sleeping on a rock, or uneven ground, or a gully. When you go to bed the temperature is just right. About 3 in the morning you are freezing. At 6 in the morning when the sun rises you are baking inside your tent and you have to get up and leave the tent it is so hot.
A white person shopping at Walmart? Heresy.
Yes again, another seemingly amusing site to bring out the stupids in the nation.
I read a prediction that the swine flu will infect 90,000 this year. I hope that infection starts deep within the backwards south and midwest, where hospitals are miles out of reach. unfortunately that’s wishful thinking and it’ll hit the large cities the hardest, oh well, I guess ya’ll just be stuck with infecting each other and throwing “I’m better than you,” attacks at a website. morons
I agree with treedonkey. We campers just need a break away from the city slickers for a while: the same whining coach potatoes who will be begging us for our home-grown food come the apocalypse… just kidding.
Plus, if you’re a screamer you can shag all night under the stars (and scare away the animals) without getting shot to death in the morning by your bleary-eyed neighbour.
I agree with ZombieKid.
Or boys with the right kind of father figures who encourage their boys to grow up without being scarred or abused, you referring to sexist bigot fathers will laugh at their boys or girls for acting “not like they are men or women”. +
Sully, he’s like a man who installs a false sense of masculine identity the same way the Klan or Nazis do to their own on “how to be a proud white” racist. The boys scouts and girls scouts alike are good ways for young children to learn about nature, survival and self-esteem. +
Aaahhh, the hippy spirit of ’67 when the young white kids rebelled against the establishment and formed communes in the wilds. Pppssss…where’s the weed at? We gotta find a stream to set up tent, our drinking water to be shared and never bottled for $5 a pop. Who needs clothing? We don’t need soap…and we got natural foods around us. And don’t forget the string guitar: let’s sing stories together.+
I could recall seeing a 40-something white woman walk nude in a playground! LoL. Another memory is a young boy (age 5?) taking a wiss on a tree stump. Or 3 lots down a long-haired old guy and two younger men brought over two women, and what I heard was moans, laughs & words about genitals. +
I don’t know…he rarely comes by in 2009, besides we got a few members in need of a swift ban from the blog. They are really racists who don’t know it’s all a joke, a satirical blog. +
Rebecca, the whole forest is full of pollen from pine cones, wildflowers and sage bushes. Tell them you can’t because you’re allergic to natural areas. Or better yet, you’re afraid of the weirdo creepy drifters walk around at camp sites. +
Erik the Great, how about learning to fish with your bare hands? Or defending yourself from raccoons at middle of the night. And cardinals may poop on the picnic tables.+
What you mean by “homies”? Here we go on the jokes: They know how to live in the heat or cold without the heater in winter or A/c in the summer. They eat anything turkey (bologna slices), fake oil-water cheese slices and white bread (when not on ethnic dining) without a slice of tomato, maybe iceberg lettuce. And they must own a gun in case the window bars in the bedroom/garage/front room is broke. +
I agree that if the equipment is more expensive that’s what most white people want, I wonder if that what makes those
bears always go for those expensive tents and be tearing them (WP) a new a$$ hole tent and all.
Also real WP don’t bring beer on camping trips they bring chardonnay or burgundy and have on flip flops.
This is so funny! It really made me laugh! Actually, i’m quite ‘white’, almost pink to be exact, and I have never been camping. I sincerely believe I’m allergic, so I will never ever chance it. I’ll go running in canyons anytime, or hiking, but that’s the extent of it!
My native american fiance likes camping, however, this is one thing we will never experience together (that’s why he has children!).
No, the bring beer, just imported bottles or a keg they brewed in their microbrewery.
I need a speedball, Camping sounds good if it includes a good drug freakout. White people like to freakout. Not bathing or shaving, lots of drugs, and bugs. An unwashed white woman, my favorite. Hairy armpits and bushy gooey holes.
what happens when you are with your girl and want to bump uglies, you have not showered and probably have crotch rot–is “camping” really fun then?
Black people do not like camping.
http://www.sbpdl.com
Well, someone forgot to tell Clarence Thomas, as he not only likes to do it, but he likes to do it at Wal-Mart.
this blog is not serious, it is humourous.
SBPDL is horrendous racism, without one iota of humour or intelligence.
“love thy neighbour as you would love thyself”: you and SBPDL readers are soooooooo far from this, god help you all. enjoy purgatory.
(MDT):mydrunktexts.com For those of you who turn into prolific and inappropriate texters after a few drinks, be warned: your SMS ramblings may end up as someone else’s entertainment online.
stuffwhitepeoplelike.com = funny ha ha
stuff black people don’t like = funny uh-oh
racists have no sense of irony. probably because all the ignorance doesn’t leave room for anything else.
I loathe camping. You are wrong.
thanks for bringing that to light, i was just about to go “camping” with my girl but your words saved me and now the idea is safely capture within quotations. You do everyone a service when you comment, I assume you comment on youtube videos as well?
My white friends in Sweden love to go on walking trips through grassy meadows and untouched forests. The problem is they ask me to go with them. What’s the big deal? Oh maybe it is the ticks that thrive there that are diseased and force you to look into every crack and body crevice when you get home that evening, great fun and so good for you. I think Swedes are the whitest people in the world.
Hey, camping is cool. Check out my topless camping pics in my homepage if you want to see just how cool.
This article I just found seems to counter the idea that camping is for all races… and it seems to insinuate, correctly, that saving the environment is only for white people…
http://stuffblackpeopledontlike.blogspot.com/2009/08/29-great-outdoors.html
You forgot about the part where we sit around the campfire wearing outdoor performance clothes and drinking microbrews.
I think you mean pawnage. If you are going to be the grammar police, at least be white and correct your spelling.
Check mate !
An unfunny retelling of a Jim Gaffigan routine is no way to go through life, son.
“microbrew”–crap white dopes buy that is overpriced and tastes like thick mud; and that way before they’re 40 years old they can look like a typical american fat f-k.
this is truly an interesting blog…but I like it!
Clearly somebody doesn’t really know what white people like. Being a Subaru owner and former REI employee, I can say that most camping, with it’s crowds drinking miller without a hint of irony and tents you can fit in is like RV-ing – full of the wrong kind of whites. National parks are even worse.
No, the real lampoonables go backpacking in designated wilderness areas, carrying all their supplies on their backs, and therefore confining themselves to two and three person tents smaller than a twin mattress, single burner dinners (a true tragedy) on stoves that tip over with the slightest bump, and gear that’s twice as expensive so it can have half the material. All so they get somewhere that nobody else is, because nobody else thinks it’s fun to go there.
I love it, and am leaving tomorrow for a good backpacking trip.
So, where the white people at? Well, they’re in the woods, where, curiously, is where the Natives were before we kicked them out to the desert and we moved to suburbia. Now, we support the economy by purchasing expensive gear made to replicate stone knives, buffalo hide blankets and wraps and brush wikiups so we can “survive” the harshness, the sheer nature of the woods now that suburbia has become simultaneously boring and dangerous. Cooking an omellete over an open Coleman Stove with our William-Sonoma Easy Omellette Maker brings us back to where the Natives were in the first place.
Best post in a while, guys. Thanks. With regard to the car racks, I think most white people tend to go for Thule over Yakima–not only are they more expensive, they’re European.
May I join you Eric? I will bring the K-Y and some hamsters!
Sense many comments have been made on the black camping experience, I thought I would shed some blight. Many blacks will converge in a single hotel room. Get this, and set up a grill in the bathtub to enjoy some barbecue. Copious amounts of 40’s and of course weed and ho’s. The room is trashed, just to give it that at home feel. The noise and smell drive out the other guests. At the end of the black camping trip, one of the campers draws his whistle and shoots one of the others. This ends the black camping trip, the victim is of to the er, where you white people get to pick up the tab!
So You Want To Be a Banquet Manager? You think being a banquet manager is glamorous? You try dealing with cranky chefs and bitchy waiters all day – and that’s without the nasty customers. Visit my blog and see what it’s REALLY like in this crazy profession.
hah rubin gold, try camping with mexicans–they bring their 10+ kids, their fat wifes/girlfriends, and start a nasty bbq in the middle of a park, filled with corn syrup tortillas, and lower quality meat, kids screaming, “adults” howling, banda music blasting, modified civics with very loud mufflers/flutes engines revving, beat up pick up trucks parked on the front lawns, many mexicans will converge in one area, even though fit for a family of one, they will fit 4-6 families in one area-they are famous for that and enjoy watching real estate prices plummet.
You want to see a typical happy camper (a purely Caucasoid term BTW) check out this dude on Amazon.com:
Survival; Insurance for a Revolution
A Listmania! list by Jenisis (florida)
The list author says: “I am putting this together in case of a revolution. I may not know everything you might need, but these items are some of the things i would like to have; other than some lead and lead throwers(if you know what i mean).”
http://www.amazon.com/gp/richpub/listmania/fullview/RHET8VNU2JR0Z/ref=cm_pdp_lm_all_itms
You think they KNOW WalMart won’t be open until the new fuhrer’s installed? I can’t help but notice, solar power and foreign made electronics and water filters are the only thing that will still be workable when the dude’s F-350 craps-out by the second day and he’s freezing to death in soaking cotton from a space blanket INSIDE a fat guy’s 60lb wet Coleman sleeping bag! He do have a good liter for his crosses though… Wonder how the little lady will do without Dancing With The Stars, while he’s trying to tune in Savage Nation?
the native american babble is old and tired!! the entire worldssince man has been on earth is one groups out muscling another for land and resources! The indians were busy killing each other until somebody else more advanced came along and kicked their butts!! sorry, they were not some wise peaceful bunch sitting around loving nature in peace and harmony!
OMG! Definitely some white people in Sou. Cal. will have nightmares of the future of their once white golden state.
It reminds me of the song “Mexican caravan” by the punk rock Butthole surfers from the ’80s. And play the Squirrel Nut Zippers song “Zoot suit riot” out loud from your car, except a few big bearded Mexican guys in Raiders jacket (or bare shirted with gothic letters) may get medieval on you, asi. +
Since when white people wanna live like Africans? A tent out in the wilderness, plain dirt or a few trees as shelter, search for long journeys for water (carry a jug on top of the head), kids run bare clothed and perhaps pot-bellied from the effects of not eating good, rich or warm food. Don’t forget to find a leopard for rugs or meat for tonight while we all sit by the bonfire. Bless the children with names like “Kunta Kinte” and let’s play some funky black Afro Caribbean reggae new age “jungle” music tonight. +
Anyone seen Survivor season 6 or 7 a few years ago when the contestants were grouped into teams by race? Yeah in a wilderness area, they formed “tribes” like the whites and blacks, Asians and Hispanics…and I always frowned they didn’t get to new teams: Jews, Muslims, Gays and Lesbians. I wonder who’ll win the final round and for the tribal leader to say “the race has spoken: the white team LOSE”. +
Seen it, read it, liked it, LOLed.
A line of Toto sing about how they like F*ck*ble “Africa”:
“Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you…
Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do.
I bless the rains down in Africa…
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had”.
Subliminal messages on the song indicate a white liberal agenda to expand their neo-liberal globalization economic business practices the same way they did to Africans as recently as 130 years ago. +
Why is it white people drink beer, but aren’t drunk? Is it a generalization of black people, Mexicans, American Indians or Japanese are more prone to “drunkeness”, intoxication or rowdiness associated with alcohol in their body systems? It’s not illegal but white people wished they never traded alcohol to the natives when they first entered the wilds of Africa or these long transoceanic voyages smell of rum.+
Clown? How about whore.
Some douchebag John a-hole frame did just that in mass hole land, he was a Harvard grad pretending to be homeless, now he is writing a book about it. How is that for white.
How ugly and small of you. Yeah you must be a white american, a European would not act like you. Oh well bad breeding.
Peace to all, there has been some concern about the crazy comments. Well let me put you at ease. I am the father of a new movement, cult if you will. Its known as the peace through lunacy movement. I teach my followers to let their inner lunatic out, this is the only way to find peace, inner joy and true freedom. By reading SWPL you learn how crazy white people are. All this pent up craziness is bad for white people, and must be let out. Please don’t hate, for there is no need to fear madness, embrace and enjoy!
Too right; car campers are only marginally the right kind of white – a half-step removed from RV campers.
Real White People carry their gear on their back and avoid designated trails (although in certain situations it’s permissible to make a Llama or a dog carry the gear).
Lomographs – how very Cageian of them.
Bleh!
BRAINBOOGER.COM
I guess they were not aware of how damaging all that jet fuel it took to get there is more damaging to the environment then staying in a hotel…
the illegal mexicans have taken over my neighborhood too. they scavenge through trash barrels for tin cans and return bottles, and through out garbage all over the neighborhood, they steal shopping carriages and rattle noises all hours of the day and night. Something must be done in addition to their delapitated pick-up trucks, unregistered, unmonitored because we all do not want to offend anyone.
Can the the next SWPL item be “Screenshots of iPhone text messages being posted on facebook?”
visit me http://celebwatch-justme.blogspot.com/
White people aren’t exactly quiet and well behaved. In fact, they’re just as obnoxious as the Mexicans. I had a caucasianal neighbor who fancied himself a rock musician. He practiced his “music” all day and night, which mostly took the form of ear-deafening screeching noises on his guitar and yelling nonsensical lyrics as loudly as possible. He was so happy to get new speakers that he invited all his little friends over, puffed weed smoke all over my balcony, and “performed” for 6 hours without a break (10 PM – 4 AM). By the time I moved out of that place, I was hoping to get a Hispanic neighbor. At least the kids – all 20 of them – go to sleep at night!
i like to drink cat urine!
I know. I have so many (white) friends who love camping. None of my black friends like camping.
Check out my comedy blog I’m starting: http://www.laugh.tk/
Inspired by you, Lander!
They do sometimes drive an SUV as a second car. But usually those SUV’s are a Subaru Outback, Ford Escape (Hybrid, of course) or the Toyota Rav4. So you may count it as a SUV or a Prius with hight wheel base.
XDDDD
ZOMG I’m loading up my backpack, getting in my car and walking around in the mountains for a few days!
agreed, the whites would blast their teenie bopper, college kid music with no respect for any of the other neighbors, at least with mexicans they need to get up at 4AM to go to the landscaping job or playing with horses, and all their 15 kids are sound asleep, perhaps someday my neighbor will be mexican.
many places have noise ordinances, does not matter what time of day, just call the police–those trust funders and other spoiled whites need to be put in their place.
she is an ass puppet. a fraud and a political lacky.
Yea my (white) friends also like camping. I was forced into this activity. We drove for several hours until we reached our destination. Upon our arrival we were warned that there were rattle snakes and black bears which have (on the rare occasion) attacked people. I was of course the only person of color for 20 miles, and my (white) friends did not seem to understand why I felt nervous when a large group of (white) people gathered together and started playing banjos and singing country music. The campsite had running water and there was a bathroom less than a mile away with showers. I did not feel any closer to nature, I just felt farther from safety.
Suffice to say this trip DID include a trip to a hunting store, the largest store I ever saw in my life full of things my (white) friends ooed and aahed over including stuffed animals (bears, lions, etc), hunting equipment, kayaks, fishing gear, and other random items which they purchased.
You obviously don’t live in the South…
I know that I am a loser and nobody respects my opinion. For the last couple days, I have been stealing enigma, uh huh, louiecoolgato, etc, etc. I have single handedly ruined a blog site with my ignorance and stupidity. I have no life, I just sit here in my moms basement trying to think of clever things to say, but I never do. I hate my life, I secretly wish I were born black and I also wish I voted for Obama. I apologize Mr Enigma for smearing your good name, I will attempt to not do it again, but you know, sometimes, idiots like myself can’t help doing the things we do. I’m like a mad dog, I just…..do. Please forgive me for making a fool out of myself, all of you on this site, I apologize.
Can your next post item PLEASE be about:
“FOOD BLOGS”
Please please please!
thebitterfoodie.blogspot.com
“Flavor Tripping” has to be coming soon. Has to.
So white, so true!
PUSSY
Camping is not expensive at all, and you do not need to buy all the expensive stuff from REI to have a good time. I sleep in my $30.00 tent at night and sleep great. The author of this post is just a PUSSY!
Just picking every overstated, negative aspect he can find.
I find this an inaccurate generalization focusing on the upper class white.
I’ll say it again PUSSY!
I love to camp but I don’t like to camp with a lot of people because I am a very simple camper. One bag, my sleeping bag, with a 2 person tent, on a train if necessary, with a pack of rice a roni to make in my stainless steel pot which I boil water in. Some vodka in my gatorade so I can pass out and fall asleep and sleep in a bit the next morning. Lounge around for a while. Make some fires (without getting caught by the ranger b/c I pick up large “twigs”). Go home. It should be easy. Not complicated. It should not cost a lot of money to camp.
LMAO. i’m white. and i just got back from a week camping trip.
My mother, who is special, went “back to the land”, which is a phrase white people use which means “camping for forty years in the Vermont wilderness” and using – but not aknowledging the need for – the resources (ie plumbing, electricity, cars, windex) belonging to the diehard bourgousie neighbors who own such.
I thought earlier white people according to SWPL rather live in a city (downtown) not live in the wilderness (or close by water). Those wealthy whites want to live anywhere but the suburbs, the deserts or ethnic sections of cities. +
I love camping..havent gone in quite a while tho.
http://www.dailymacho.com
You should do a post on how people will never admit to seeing a movie that doesn’t get high critical reviews. I must confess if a movie doesn’t make the “fresh” rating on rottentomatoes.com it makes it much less likely for me to go see it.
My mother, who is special, went “back to the land”, which is a phrase white people use which means “camping for forty years in the Vermont wilderness” and using – but not aknowledging the need for – the resources (ie plumbing, electricity, cars, windex) belonging to the diehard bourgousie neighbors who own such.
thought earlier white people according to SWPL rather live in a city (downtown) not live in the wilderness (or close by water).
Hello everybody, I am the asshole using enigmas name to type ignorant
This is actually one post that doesn’t make me seem extremely white….I actually dislike camping. I like some aspects of it but those aspects can be enjoyed by going to a park or national forest for a day and then actually getting to sleep in my own warm bed. **this option also gets me out of spending the time and money in one of those expensive outdoors stores…..though it is a great place to get some nice hiking pants for travel.
that’s because you are a women..
jk…
http://www.dailymacho.com
that guy in the photo looks like walter sobchak
This white person’s idea of camping is no room service! I haven’t been camping in 20 years, and that’s the way I like it.
IS IT TIME FOR A NEW POST YET?
I TRY TO WRITE TWO A DAY….
Hehe not all white people like camping 🙂 Such a cool site name though!
–Status Crap
This is so true on so many levels. The investment in gear is crazy. I’ve spent too much money on gear over the years!
I dunno, I hate camping. I’m white and absolutely hate fighting the elements! I must be the exception to the rule!
Team Crackpot Media
2 thumbs up…way up on the plug-in. Crackpot media is like 100 times worse than 4chan or rottendotcom. Another line was crossed beyond “2 girls/1 cup”. This…I got to see. +
waiting for the post on white people and dogs…
dog shows, doggie daycare, doggie rehab, dog shows, dogs as pseudo children… you get the picture.
[unless clander already did one on the canine-o-philia and i forgot i already read it….]
He ate his own shit, he’s a bigger bitch than enigma
welfare bes goood dowg
I like how you write. Keep up the good work.
Just write.
Hello everybody, I told you I would not change my name, and damn it, here I am. I am the REAL Enigma and don’t you forget it, you stupid red neck emposter. Suck a dick. I know I pissed you off, and I plan to do it for a very long time. To those who believed that asshole was me, suck a dick and get fucked, for those who knew it wasnt me and said nothing, kiss my ass too. I’m back, actually, I never left so get use to it. hahaha. Dumb Ass Luke, Buttaroo, Nobraina, and the rest of you dumbass redneck losers who conspire to get my goat, mission NOT accomplished. I told your bitch asses that you would give up YOUR name before I give up mine!!! hahaha
So, as a show of my appreciation to the piss poor emposter(’s) attempt to make me retire my name, I give you………
enigma da director on August 30, 2009 at 2:06 pm
For your reading pleasure
enigma da director #1 on August 29, 2009 at 11:09 pm
I’m back ya’ll and I figue I will start another lil story. I see I have enough players to make a decent little drama. After reading the post on this site, I decided to name this lil story,
“No country for dumb men”
enjoy
Let me tell you a story about a time when I almost got away with identity theft. Oh, who am I. I go by many names, but due to the fact I watched one too many tough guy movies, I call myself, Hot Foot Luke. I know, it’s a silly name, but due to the fact that I am not considered cool, hot seemed like a more logical choice. Anyways, I live in a city suburb in the mid west. I can’t disclose the actual location because,….. well, if I did, it would get more people one step closer to finding out who I am. I always had trouble in school, but I am finally about to graduate. My mommy pulled a few strings for me and convinced the principal to allow me to graduate this year. Yessss, I was starting to feel the pressure of being 23yo and in still in high school. I started to feel like, well, it just was’nt cool anymore. Anyways, my story begins, the way so many do, on a clear blue monday morning.
As my alarm clock rang and broke my slumber, I had a feeling this was going to be one of those days. I hate going to school, I hate having to wake up at 5:30 in the morning to catch the school bus. My only biggest regret though was staying up late last night watching dirty cable movies. But since I can’t get a girl friend, a nerds got to do what a nerds got to do. I get from under my sheets and I shove my teddy bear, Daisy, under the bed where no one will find her. Dear ol Daisy, she has gotten me through some really lonely nights. She used to be my lil sisters teddy, she had her all dressed up. When she went away to college last year, I took advantage of the oportunity and snatched her and hid her in my room. Her fur placed against my skin feels so natural to me, not to mention, with the lil outfit lil sis put on her, I can hide my glory hole around her private areas pretty well. The hole is nice and small, easy to miss, but nice and roomy for me to do what need to do. Daisy is a very good lover, but I have no time to day dream about it now, I have to rince the residue of me and Daisys hot late night cable porn adventure off my hands. Then again, on second thought, it will take only a minute. hehe, come here daisy.
Hot foot luke reaches underneith the bed to retrieve his beloved lover Daisy, the teddy bear. He unzips the long pajama zipper on his on peice footie pajamas and rest his love on his chest, rubbing the nose against his nipples.
“oooooh, you feel sooo good baby” he says in a slow dliberate voice.
He slowly slides the lil cheerleader bear outfit off of daisy and pulls down his underwear exposing his teddy bear pleaser tool. He slides daisy’s exposed privates down towards his lil wee wee. With a blank teddy bear look on her face, she slowly mounts mt. Luke. Hot foot shutters with pleasure. His breathing is getting deeper and more intense. Beads of sweat is starting to form along his body. Daisy continues to stare blankly forward as Luke does what he do. The pleasure is building up in Luke and he starts to thrust Daisys love hole even harder.
Now usually when Hot foot Luke has his lil make out session with his baby daisy, he is careful to lock the door to his room. The reason I brought that up is because HFL realized he did’nt lock the door as his mommy turned the door knob to enter to make sure he was up for school. She swings open the door and says……………….
to be continued
Reply to this comment
enigma da director #2 on August 30, 2009 at 12:07 am
When we left off, Hot Foot Luke was in the middle of a hot steamy make out session with this little sisters teddy bear Daisy when his mommy came to check on him. She opens the door and says….
“you up my lil swee…………………OH GOOD!!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU LIL PERV!!!!!!!” she yells.
“MOM, IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. I,I,I, I, WAS……..” he stutters.
“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT, OH GOOD, AND IN THE PAJAMAS GRANDMA GAVE YOU…….HOW COULD, OH GOD.”
she closes her eyes and slams the door. Luke lost his mood that morning. He throws his teddy on the floor mad and embarrassed, not to mention ashamed. But to ad to his indignity, his bedroom door opens again and his mom storms in with rubber gloves on her hands and grabs poor Daisy.
“MOM, NOOOOO!!!!” luke yells
“DEMON, this, this, this, THING, is of the devil. To hell with it” she yells as she heads to the trashcan outside. Luke can’t protest but so much. He was always a mommas boy and did’nt have very much heart. Mom ran his life. As he watched her fussing as she threw his lover into the trash, everything seemed to move in slow motion.
“How dare that lil freak embarrass me like this” she rants outloud, ” and I know this bear, We won this bear….at the amusment park (sniff), what have you done, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE…..!!!!!!” she says getting louder and louder.
” YOU NEED JESUS, you… you…. you ….bear raping FREAK!!!, it’s your sisters bear, wait til I tell her what you have been doing to all her stuffed animals. You should be shame of yourselfff.” she rants.
Fearing his neighbors may be looking, Hot Foot Luke decide not to look around out the window for fear he may see one of them listening. He sheepishly gets dressed and sneaks past his angry mother who has just came back into the house. Luke creeps out the door, to ashamed to say his usual good byes to his mother. As he closes the door behind himself, he can still here her calling him a ‘bear fucking freak’.
He walks to the bus stop up the street from his home and he feels like the whole neighborhood is watching him. The bus can’t get here fast enough he thinks to himself as he takes his walk of shame. He thought the worst was behind him til he looked up at the bus stop and saw who was standing there. He looked up with pure dread in his eyes. His mouth became dry, a lump formed in his throat and his heart just sank. Standing at the bus stop was his bully UH HUH. Uh Huh was a senior in high school, and he always got pleasure in kicking Lukes ass so when Luke saw him there, he wanted to turn around and run but his feet wouldnt let him. He just sinks his chin onto his chest deeper and takes the last few steps to the bus stop.
“hey dumbass” Uh Huh says
“yes?” Luke answers as he looks up from the ground.
That was not a very good idea, as he looked up, he was greeted by a five fingers balled up into a big fist that landed in the middle of Hot Foot Lukes face. As Uh Huh stands there laughing, Luke realizes, it’s barely 6:15 am and his day is already THIS bad, it will only get worse. The bus pulls up and everybody gets on board. Uh huh, Greg214, will talk about him later, and our zero hotfootluke.
“I’m not as happy as I should be” Luke thinks as the bus doors close behind him. I don’t want to go to school he thinks to himself, but his fate is sealed, and he still has to face the biggest threat of all once he gets on campus. But first he has to survive the bus ride to school, and with everyone, including the bus driver who is screwing his mom picking on him, it may not be as easy as it sounds.
The bus finally arrives at the school and Luke scans the area to make sure the coast is clear of other bullies. Uh huh is not paying him any attention at the moment, so he grabs the opportunity flee. As he bolts off the bus, he beelines to his home room, grabs the desk closest to the teachers desk and he waits, waiting on who else will be arriving. Waiting to see who will be using him as a punching bag next. As he stares out the door, he sees the shadows of students going back and forth. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room. Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees……………………………
to be continues
Reply to this comment
enigma da director #3 on August 30, 2009 at 6:58 pm
When we left off last time, hot foot luke was cowarding in his class room waiting to see who his class mates would be. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room…………
Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees a female student walk in. He felt sense of releaf seeing her. He let his gaurd down somewhat sensing she was no threat. To make a long story short, he experieced a drama free first half of class. Special education class was very good to him this year but every nerd knows, there is one place where they are not safe. 12:00 high, lunch time. The time of milk carton showers, lunch tray ducking, and giving up your lunch and lunch money judgement. Luke is dreading this time. No protection from the teacher, he has to fend for himself, but after 23 years, he has learned a trick or two to survive this horrible hour. He would set at the far end of the losers table with his head down, blending in with the rest of the more cooler and respected nerds. This technique did not work this time. Even the freshmen gave him hell, but thats another story. He survived his first day of school, but after his bus ride home, his life would suddenly change forever.
Luke got off the school bus and headed home, he breathed a sigh of relief knowing that his nimesis Uh Huh did not ride the bus home today. He was able to walk alil more confident than usual. As he was walking home this day, thinking how he will be the man once he graduates in June, something caught his eye. He looked down and saw a opened letter for the players ball. It was addressed to Big dick louie, For you L.7 (squares) folks out there, the players ball is for the coolest of the cool. The ball was tonight at 9pm, the letter said. Use the letter as proof for entry.
“I guess the mailman dropped the letter” luke thought to himself.
“If I put on my most spiffy clothes, I could remake myself into something cool. Look the part, be the part as the saying goes” he rationalized. ” I will just pretend to be Louie, They won’t know. There will be lots of people there, who will know?”
Luke rushes home, opens the door and heads to his room. Laying on his bed was a not written by his mother that says
” My son, my lil pervert. I never thought in a million years that you would break my heart the way you did. I want you out of my house. I made arrangements for you to live with your biological dad and his boyfriend. I will not have a freak living under my roof. Start packing you things, I will take you there this weekend.”
Lukes heart sank, he then remembered his beloved Daisy. He runs outside and opens the trash can. There, laying next to the burnt out vibrator and used condoms was Daisy the bear. He grabs his bear and runs back into his room. He closes his door and immediately opens his closet looking for something to wear tonight.
As he thumbs thru his old sunday suits, he tries to figure out what would a pimp wear to the ball. He grabs his 1984 Miami Vice pink shirt with white slacks. Yeah, this is nice. He needs a crown, he looks at his old hats but can’t find anything so he heads to his mothers room. He raids her closet and finds he has hit the mother load. She has a pink and white extra wide rim hat with chicken feathers on the side.
“yeah, I can work this” he says as he trys it on.
He then heads to her jewelry box and grabs several fake gold rings and gold necklaces.
“I am rocking this baby, now for the main attraction.” he thinks.
He reaches for the heavy duty wooden hanger with the long plastic on it that drags to the floor. He grabs that hanger and removes the plastic. Under the plastic is the killer, a grey and brown muskrat fur coat. He puts on the coat and profiles infront of the long mirror.
” I am da shit!!!!” he thinks to himself.
In his eyes, he thinks he is the man. But in reality, he is a royal hot mess.
It is now 8:00, he puts on his last minute touches. His mom wont be home til late tonight, she is out working the block. The keys to the second car is hanging on the wall, he is set. He grabs the keys to the car and heads out on his lil adventure assuming the name of big dick louie. Will it work, we will soon find out…….
to be continue
put alil love in your heart
Sad how true this is. You should have added how they also subscribe to such publications as Backpacker magazine (like I do). I’ve yet to buy a $300 sleeping bag, though. I guess I just like reading about white people camping.
This was hilarious!
My family has been talking about going camping for awhile now. You’ve just about talked me out of it! I think I’ll take that money, stay in a HOJO, go to a zoo, and call it a weekend. That way we will have a good nights sleep, not have to catch, kill and cook our own dinner, and will still be able to commune with nature, the animals.
hahahahaha!!
..that’s all I have to say.
backpecker magazine? wow. in this economy-we will all be living like we’re homeless. volvos, saabs and all. whore foods too.
what happens when some white dolt farts in a sleeping bag? do you guys enjoy das aroma?
i luv big wite cocks in my ass yo
grape kool-aide wit cheap alkihal is da bomb yo
praise allah 4 welfare…
LIAR!
iz luv tyler perry moviez dey so kool
madia be my girl G
This is so true! A few weeks ago, some silly ass cracker was telling me that he had just bought a tent, and he was so excited about that.
you arsehole
im sure you do
http://www.dailymacho.com
learn to some grammar.
http://www.dailymacho.com
I like backpacking,eating whorganic foods, volvo station wagons, REOs, and flatulence.
dutch oven special tonacht in the white camping fest–just watch out for the mexicans–they have the banda music blasting, and the dumb whites have the indie blasting, i will be blasting in my dutch oven tonacht.
I guess you enjoy reading my lil story about you, ya identity stealing racist dumbass, well enjoy it again…..
Hello everybody, I told you I would not change my name, and damn it, here I am. I am the REAL Enigma and don’t you forget it, you stupid red neck emposter. Suck a dick. I know I pissed you off, and I plan to do it for a very long time. To those who believed that asshole was me, suck a dick and get fucked, for those who knew it wasnt me and said nothing, kiss my ass too. I’m back, actually, I never left so get use to it. hahaha. Dumb Ass Luke, Buttaroo, Nobraina, and the rest of you dumbass redneck losers who conspire to get my goat, mission NOT accomplished. I told your bitch asses that you would give up YOUR name before I give up mine!!! hahaha
So, as a show of my appreciation to the piss poor emposter(’s) attempt to make me retire my name, I give you………
enigma da director on August 30, 2009 at 2:06 pm
For your reading pleasure
enigma da director #1 on August 29, 2009 at 11:09 pm
I’m back ya’ll and I figue I will start another lil story. I see I have enough players to make a decent little drama. After reading the post on this site, I decided to name this lil story,
“No country for dumb men”
enjoy
Let me tell you a story about a time when I almost got away with identity theft. Oh, who am I. I go by many names, but due to the fact I watched one too many tough guy movies, I call myself, Hot Foot Luke. I know, it’s a silly name, but due to the fact that I am not considered cool, hot seemed like a more logical choice. Anyways, I live in a city suburb in the mid west. I can’t disclose the actual location because,….. well, if I did, it would get more people one step closer to finding out who I am. I always had trouble in school, but I am finally about to graduate. My mommy pulled a few strings for me and convinced the principal to allow me to graduate this year. Yessss, I was starting to feel the pressure of being 23yo and in still in high school. I started to feel like, well, it just was’nt cool anymore. Anyways, my story begins, the way so many do, on a clear blue monday morning.
As my alarm clock rang and broke my slumber, I had a feeling this was going to be one of those days. I hate going to school, I hate having to wake up at 5:30 in the morning to catch the school bus. My only biggest regret though was staying up late last night watching dirty cable movies. But since I can’t get a girl friend, a nerds got to do what a nerds got to do. I get from under my sheets and I shove my teddy bear, Daisy, under the bed where no one will find her. Dear ol Daisy, she has gotten me through some really lonely nights. She used to be my lil sisters teddy, she had her all dressed up. When she went away to college last year, I took advantage of the oportunity and snatched her and hid her in my room. Her fur placed against my skin feels so natural to me, not to mention, with the lil outfit lil sis put on her, I can hide my glory hole around her private areas pretty well. The hole is nice and small, easy to miss, but nice and roomy for me to do what need to do. Daisy is a very good lover, but I have no time to day dream about it now, I have to rince the residue of me and Daisys hot late night cable porn adventure off my hands. Then again, on second thought, it will take only a minute. hehe, come here daisy.
Hot foot luke reaches underneith the bed to retrieve his beloved lover Daisy, the teddy bear. He unzips the long pajama zipper on his on peice footie pajamas and rest his love on his chest, rubbing the nose against his nipples.
“oooooh, you feel sooo good baby” he says in a slow dliberate voice.
He slowly slides the lil cheerleader bear outfit off of daisy and pulls down his underwear exposing his teddy bear pleaser tool. He slides daisy’s exposed privates down towards his lil wee wee. With a blank teddy bear look on her face, she slowly mounts mt. Luke. Hot foot shutters with pleasure. His breathing is getting deeper and more intense. Beads of sweat is starting to form along his body. Daisy continues to stare blankly forward as Luke does what he do. The pleasure is building up in Luke and he starts to thrust Daisys love hole even harder.
Now usually when Hot foot Luke has his lil make out session with his baby daisy, he is careful to lock the door to his room. The reason I brought that up is because HFL realized he did’nt lock the door as his mommy turned the door knob to enter to make sure he was up for school. She swings open the door and says……………….
to be continued
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enigma da director #2 on August 30, 2009 at 12:07 am
When we left off, Hot Foot Luke was in the middle of a hot steamy make out session with this little sisters teddy bear Daisy when his mommy came to check on him. She opens the door and says….
“you up my lil swee…………………OH GOOD!!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU LIL PERV!!!!!!!” she yells.
“MOM, IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. I,I,I, I, WAS……..” he stutters.
“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT, OH GOOD, AND IN THE PAJAMAS GRANDMA GAVE YOU…….HOW COULD, OH GOD.”
she closes her eyes and slams the door. Luke lost his mood that morning. He throws his teddy on the floor mad and embarrassed, not to mention ashamed. But to ad to his indignity, his bedroom door opens again and his mom storms in with rubber gloves on her hands and grabs poor Daisy.
“MOM, NOOOOO!!!!” luke yells
“DEMON, this, this, this, THING, is of the devil. To hell with it” she yells as she heads to the trashcan outside. Luke can’t protest but so much. He was always a mommas boy and did’nt have very much heart. Mom ran his life. As he watched her fussing as she threw his lover into the trash, everything seemed to move in slow motion.
“How dare that lil freak embarrass me like this” she rants outloud, ” and I know this bear, We won this bear….at the amusment park (sniff), what have you done, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE…..!!!!!!” she says getting louder and louder.
” YOU NEED JESUS, you… you…. you ….bear raping FREAK!!!, it’s your sisters bear, wait til I tell her what you have been doing to all her stuffed animals. You should be shame of yourselfff.” she rants.
Fearing his neighbors may be looking, Hot Foot Luke decide not to look around out the window for fear he may see one of them listening. He sheepishly gets dressed and sneaks past his angry mother who has just came back into the house. Luke creeps out the door, to ashamed to say his usual good byes to his mother. As he closes the door behind himself, he can still here her calling him a ‘bear fucking freak’.
He walks to the bus stop up the street from his home and he feels like the whole neighborhood is watching him. The bus can’t get here fast enough he thinks to himself as he takes his walk of shame. He thought the worst was behind him til he looked up at the bus stop and saw who was standing there. He looked up with pure dread in his eyes. His mouth became dry, a lump formed in his throat and his heart just sank. Standing at the bus stop was his bully UH HUH. Uh Huh was a senior in high school, and he always got pleasure in kicking Lukes ass so when Luke saw him there, he wanted to turn around and run but his feet wouldnt let him. He just sinks his chin onto his chest deeper and takes the last few steps to the bus stop.
“hey dumbass” Uh Huh says
“yes?” Luke answers as he looks up from the ground.
That was not a very good idea, as he looked up, he was greeted by a five fingers balled up into a big fist that landed in the middle of Hot Foot Lukes face. As Uh Huh stands there laughing, Luke realizes, it’s barely 6:15 am and his day is already THIS bad, it will only get worse. The bus pulls up and everybody gets on board. Uh huh, Greg214, will talk about him later, and our zero hotfootluke.
“I’m not as happy as I should be” Luke thinks as the bus doors close behind him. I don’t want to go to school he thinks to himself, but his fate is sealed, and he still has to face the biggest threat of all once he gets on campus. But first he has to survive the bus ride to school, and with everyone, including the bus driver who is screwing his mom picking on him, it may not be as easy as it sounds.
The bus finally arrives at the school and Luke scans the area to make sure the coast is clear of other bullies. Uh huh is not paying him any attention at the moment, so he grabs the opportunity flee. As he bolts off the bus, he beelines to his home room, grabs the desk closest to the teachers desk and he waits, waiting on who else will be arriving. Waiting to see who will be using him as a punching bag next. As he stares out the door, he sees the shadows of students going back and forth. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room. Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees……………………………
to be continues
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enigma da director #3 on August 30, 2009 at 6:58 pm
When we left off last time, hot foot luke was cowarding in his class room waiting to see who his class mates would be. Then a shadow stops and heads into the room…………
Luke looks aniously at the door to see who walks in, his eyes get big and palms get sweaty as he sees a female student walk in. He felt sense of releaf seeing her. He let his gaurd down somewhat sensing she was no threat. To make a long story short, he experieced a drama free first half of class. Special education class was very good to him this year but every nerd knows, there is one place where they are not safe. 12:00 high, lunch time. The time of milk carton showers, lunch tray ducking, and giving up your lunch and lunch money judgement. Luke is dreading this time. No protection from the teacher, he has to fend for himself, but after 23 years, he has learned a trick or two to survive this horrible hour. He would set at the far end of the losers table with his head down, blending in with the rest of the more cooler and respected nerds. This technique did not work this time. Even the freshmen gave him hell, but thats another story. He survived his first day of school, but after his bus ride home, his life would suddenly change forever.
Luke got off the school bus and headed home, he breathed a sigh of relief knowing that his nimesis Uh Huh did not ride the bus home today. He was able to walk alil more confident than usual. As he was walking home this day, thinking how he will be the man once he graduates in June, something caught his eye. He looked down and saw a opened letter for the players ball. It was addressed to Big dick louie, For you L.7 (squares) folks out there, the players ball is for the coolest of the cool. The ball was tonight at 9pm, the letter said. Use the letter as proof for entry.
“I guess the mailman dropped the letter” luke thought to himself.
“If I put on my most spiffy clothes, I could remake myself into something cool. Look the part, be the part as the saying goes” he rationalized. ” I will just pretend to be Louie, They won’t know. There will be lots of people there, who will know?”
Luke rushes home, opens the door and heads to his room. Laying on his bed was a not written by his mother that says
” My son, my lil pervert. I never thought in a million years that you would break my heart the way you did. I want you out of my house. I made arrangements for you to live with your biological dad and his boyfriend. I will not have a freak living under my roof. Start packing you things, I will take you there this weekend.”
Lukes heart sank, he then remembered his beloved Daisy. He runs outside and opens the trash can. There, laying next to the burnt out vibrator and used condoms was Daisy the bear. He grabs his bear and runs back into his room. He closes his door and immediately opens his closet looking for something to wear tonight.
As he thumbs thru his old sunday suits, he tries to figure out what would a pimp wear to the ball. He grabs his 1984 Miami Vice pink shirt with white slacks. Yeah, this is nice. He needs a crown, he looks at his old hats but can’t find anything so he heads to his mothers room. He raids her closet and finds he has hit the mother load. She has a pink and white extra wide rim hat with chicken feathers on the side.
“yeah, I can work this” he says as he trys it on.
He then heads to her jewelry box and grabs several fake gold rings and gold necklaces.
“I am rocking this baby, now for the main attraction.” he thinks.
He reaches for the heavy duty wooden hanger with the long plastic on it that drags to the floor. He grabs that hanger and removes the plastic. Under the plastic is the killer, a grey and brown muskrat fur coat. He puts on the coat and profiles infront of the long mirror.
” I am da shit!!!!” he thinks to himself.
In his eyes, he thinks he is the man. But in reality, he is a royal hot mess.
It is now 8:00, he puts on his last minute touches. His mom wont be home til late tonight, she is out working the block. The keys to the second car is hanging on the wall, he is set. He grabs the keys to the car and heads out on his lil adventure assuming the name of big dick louie. Will it work, we will soon find out…….
to be continue
put alil love in your heart
😉
You want funny?
http://www.brainbooger.com/2/post/2009/09/i-love-little-girls-they-make-me-feel-so-vamp.html
http://stuffblackpeopledontlike.blogspot.com/2009/09/554-joke-from-boondock-saints.html
The Boondock Saints, what white people love…
The only problem with this is that most rescues do not require much from the government – most rescues are actually performed by VOLUNTEERS! And anyone who does camp should support a local search and rescue group because you never know when they might have to come save you!!
You sir are a bore, a real snooze act. So fucking boring and stupid, I doubt anyone would steal your lame act.
I hates da white peolpes, and all you like. fuck you
Bwahaha, you’re gonna love this – 1800-A-INDIAN – another write-up for Stuff White People Like 😉
OMG! Why can’t you go back to befriending Mexicans when the illegal immigration trend in Cal. peaked in the 90s? The majority of hired domestic workers are Mexican/Hispanic, therefore can be “a white man’s or girl’s best friend”.
Fuck You, atleast I stole a good 10 minutes out of your life as you read the WHOLE THING dumbass. Sweet dreams bitch.
put alil love in your heart
🙂
p.s
Last I checked, nobody bothered to steal your name loser, suck a dick.
😉
I love that bollywood tight shirt/wind machine–it is awesome for all those dorky white people.
The shit is so unimaginative, lacking of any wit, I didn’t make it through the first line. Your reply is juvenile, I just hope I have not offended a retarded person.
As a “native american” “american indian” whatever, me and almost half of my tribe have to camp out for a couple of weekends every year to fulfill some old traditions. We know how to get by with canvas tents, wooden frames, minimal water, etc.
Outside of that specific time, virtually no one goes camping for the sake of camping. If it wasn’t for these obligations, I’m positive not a single one of us would go camping for the hell of it and certainly not for the fun of it.
The good thing is that when we turn down an offer to camp with our white brothers and sisters, they assume we love the outdoors and they never question why we refuse. They must think the great spirit is telling us to sit this one out.
Hahah. White people are funny aren’t they? =]
Have you white people seen this horrible stupid Amstel light tv ad?
I fucking hate it and hope Hitler bomb the shit out of that stupid country. Thank you.
http://funns.wordpress.com
that’s what white people like.
funny pictures
Gahhhhh I love this blog. The overall tone of it makes me laugh my ass off every time I visit. Nice work!! Part of the reason it’s so funny is because it is so, SO true!
As a non-white person who grew up in a white family, a white town, and a predominantly white region of the US (I was adopted as a newborn), I can attest to this. Hilariously accurate, please keep posting!
I went camping took a shit then fell in it. Its a fun camping game played by fucked up white people.
I don’t even know where to begin heaping praises because all that you write is true. When you had the “Outdoors” post a while back, I was wondering why “Camping” wasn’t explicitly emphasized–that’s because it deserves its own post, of course!
And I love that bit at the end about the allergies. I remember talking about pizza places with a white person (in San Francisco) and she was asking me if there was a place where one could get–believe it or not–a gluten-free, egg-free, milk-free, AND soy-free pizza that used only organic ingredients.
You should do a post on the weeklong festival known as “Burning Man,” which just finished today (Sept 7). So many white people acting crazy out on the Nevada playa! Much more intense than plain ol’ camping (ex: 100 degrees at daytime, 40 degrees at night; nothing for sale except coffee & ice; no trash cans–you have to pack out whatever you pack in, no exceptions!). Nudity, drugs, public drunkenness, “art,” and a 70-foot tall wooden “Man” burned Saturday night—CRAZY TIME!!
Addendum: When I say “so many white people,” I mean, 50,000+ people creating a temporary “community” out in the high desert. Yeah, it’s wild.
Worst case scenarios include: getting lost, poisoned, killed by an animal, and encountering an RV. Of these outcomes, the latter is seen by white people as the worst since it involves an encounter with the wrong kind of white people.
Heck, those with RVs ARE my kind of people 😉 Especially the ones that get satellite tvs in theirs 😀
The extreme amount of traffic, upon which these Thule racks are affixed, exiting New Hampshire via Route 93 South after Labor Day Weekend is a testament to this.
Am currently adjusting to “white” things such as tailgating and camping. camping is definitely still a little bit confusing for me. especially after being bitten endlessly by mosquitos. but the smores are yummy.
Hey! I resemble those remarks!
How the hell is “Flannel” not on this list?
Check our site out, all of the games are awesome!
yo these games are the shit yo thanks for sharing
Thanks for sharing…
Amen brother that site is the best
…and he has a tiny penis!
You are both a cunt and a coon!
Can’t believe this took 128 posts. It takes a white person to leave a totally comfortable house, to go out in the woods and ‘live off the land’
But other countries camp. Mostly in sub Saharan Africa. It’s called life. You white folks do the craziesf things.
SWPL dream come true!
Check our site out, all of the games are awesome!!!
Cool
awesome site man thanks 4 sharing
Amen that site is the coolest!
I love having gay sex with my servants, and burning down orphanages! I write for http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com it’s a very unoriginal/unclever site. My penis is less than two inces long, and I have trouble getting it up!
Very funny, I like this blog.
Faggot…
I have just found this blog and OMG. I’m not white enough!!!!!
Did you time warp from 2008? We don’t like johhny-come-lately types around here.
Well, we need more comments…and people. White people found this site, the non-whites keep on coming…and we should be proud of our diversity when more non-whites outnumber whites 8 to 1 worldwide. Keep it comin’, people of color. +
i don’t find this site funny…i think i have a terrible sense of humor…probably because i’m white and i like not having a sense of humor.
You know what else white people like? Blogs that get updated regularly. Now I remember why I deleted this bookmark a year ago…
I find this blog, and especially this post, very entertaining. Though I do find most of the entries to be true for all races. I am white, I love camping and several of my friends love camping. However, there will be white people who hate, and black people who like, a majority of these posts.
would that make all those white folks who go to black rock nevada this time of year double-dong douchebags? someone spray painted a giant ‘man’ icon on the road and wrote: welcome back lame-o. camping sucks.
I say Herb, have you any erb?
I love modes. I think its a white thing.
Do you read blogs while sitting in a coffee shop using your lap top??
White people camping? Are there buffets for the fat pigs. Most whites are fat lazy soda swilling, pill popping, tv watching morons. Oh whites camp out in a huge R.V. a continuation of their pig life.
I met you today Chris. You effing rock. The photograph of you and me together will make me Queen of the nerdish White Folk I know…
Thank you.
Kate
This one was weak. I usually like these but this one’s one of the bad ones.
This is hilarious and so true! I’m forwarding to my friend as soon as I post this.
Camping is what white people like to spend the summer, who else wants to live in the wilderness or the hinterlands? White people, keep moving into the rural ex-urbs and enjoy the 2-hour drive to (and from) work. Ah, the “middle of nowhere” away from crime, blight, pollution and you know. +
If white people are involved it must also be linked to perversion. Maybe white people go camping with the little rodents, hamsters, very sick!
what an achievemenT!
only TWKOWP like flannel….
“away from crime,blight, pollution and you know” What niccas?
Or bathing, working, being on time. Stinky dangerous lazy fat thugs, and that is just the women!
Welfare is the label that pays me, food stamps feed me.
I was lost in the Sierra Nevada once for three weeks, now I hate white people!
I hate gingers too, they don’t tan, and have no souls.
Looks more like bumsmack, and you smell, dirty fucking creep, asshole.
You’re welcome douchebag.
sweating, mosquitos, no bathroom or super nasty bug infested bathroom without a door and a foul smell… tents and shitty sleeping conditions!! no thank you!
Any comment that begins “I was” and proceeds to recite the great adventure that leads to potential book deal was written by white person
Deep down in the heart of white people, the return to the wild calls the Caucasian race back to the “primitive”. When the black or Hispanic flow into the urban areas stops, then the white people will shout “free at last, free at last, white god almighty, we’re free.” Kinda dumb isn’t it? +
Your right Michael Deeeznutsinyourmouth, you are kinda DUMB. What the hell is your dumbass talking about. It is sooo pathetic, not only are you dumb, but you even admit yourself that what you write is dumb.
the mind wobbles
😉
No Marios, your mom.
🙂
That’s why you live in a trailer park michael?
😉
“Conversely, any camping trip that ends in death at the hands of nature or requires the use of valuable government resources for a rescue is seen as relatively positive in white culture.”
ha ha. See also: climbing snow covered mountinas and requiring costly helicopter rescues. (Into Thin Air)
“The storm, which claimed five lives and left countless more in guilt-ridden disarray, would also provide the impetus for Into Thin Air, Krakauer’s epic account of the May 1996 disaster …the Illustrated Edition shows readers what this tragic climb looked like.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake.
Hello loser! Go take your prozac, you mindless piece of shit. Fuck you.
such a fucking LOSER, how do you do it boy?
I love the way people use this blog as a way of grading themselves. Either dumb honky or hip self aware cool whitey. Ha ha. Oh no! I like coffee AND Mos Def. Which should I give up?
Face it, black or white, if you’ve got time to even read this you are in the richest 2% of the worlds population and thus worthy of death.
See you at the guillotine suckers.
why do I use so many names? I wanted to keep my beloved Micheal D. name untouched, but those nigras got to me.
Yoink
yoink
yoink
why do I use so many names? I wanted to keep my beloved Micheal D. name untouched, but those nigras got to me.
Yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
You slipped up beeeotch. Michael D. Eichman. welcome to the gutter!!
You slipped up beeeotch. Michael D. Eichman. welcome to the gutter!! We now know who you are…..
You slipped up beeeotch. Michael D. Eichman. welcome to the gutter!! your Michael name ain’t worth shit from now on….
i’s wood luv to tells all yous a story bout me
1 day a cuple yeers ago i suked a big juicy dick and it was good reel good. last nite my dad stuk his tung in myz asshole and i liked it i’s like it alot mm mmm. this mornin i was wachin saved by da bell on da tv end i’s got real horny when i’s saw zak morris so i started jerking off wit a cheeze grater it bes da best tug i’s ever had than i had myz dog (whos i namd al sharpton) like my cumy dick cleen!
2 bes continued
😉
Hey Michael D.? you might want to look at the other 127 sites with your worthless name on them…
We now know who you are autism boy….LOL.+
YOINK!
i am a loser with too many names and too much time. i think the reason why i’m skrewd up is cuz my dad rapes me… Blak pwr
i am a loser with too many names and too much time. i think the reason why i’m skrewd up is cuz my dad rapes me… Whte pwr
A little extra humor to go with that pic!
i is a unedumacated nigg wit no job no bitch end no respect
p.s. i have a very small penis(that be y i is stil a virgen dawgg)
^ i dont no y i wrote dat, i guess it be cuz i is a dum pussy
KFC and Cock
it be all i’s need dawgg
i is be a bitchbol yo
You should not have started all that racial shit Mikey. It seems that you thought you can bully with your stereotypes, but it backfired on ya!
What’s the difference between you talking about african americans like you do and I’m talking about you with a disability?
Same bigoted shit, different groups.
Stop your bullshit and I’ll stop mine.
i guess it be cuz i is a dum pussy too….and chunky redd fucked me!..
but i is be a bitchbol and chunky redd is my pimp!
What happened about the heroin? You know that spike wets your whistle. After some KFC, you needs to be shooting up your hood, killing some of the homies. Little splash of kool aid bang some fat slob sista, lounging with some gangsta rap. See you gots a full life homes.
Note: No offense towards any afro-americans out there, this is meant to piss off liberal fool white people, you know the ones who are always trying to help the black man, beware of these no good white fools.
Given the hilarity of this blog – these comments are so disappointing.
go have a cry
Packing? I came to this site for some help. I was told there would be some hamster info. I can”t get my little guys to enter my asshole, any help.
HAHAHAHA I found this site on http://www.DanielDickey.com and I must admit it’s jsut as funny!!
I can help you out with that problem, I can squeeze a raccoon up my ass and enjoy every minute of it.
I know what happened to the heroin? You know that spike wets my whistle. After some KFC, I needs to be shooting up my hood, killing some of the homies. Little splash of kool aid bang some fat slob biker babe, lounging with some country singing dudes. See you gots a full life homes.
Note: No offense towards any afro-americans out there, this is meant to piss off liberal fool white people, you know the ones who are always trying to help keep the black man down, beware of these no good white fools.
ewww girls have cooties… i like me some msn meat yo
i like to stick goats up my ass
Cock is awesome dawgg
COCK IS GOOD G
This is hilarious. It’s sad most of the comments I read are from fools who cannot appreciate a little humor. Some people are wound up way too tight.
Good and light gear helps, but not required.
In 1955, Emma “Grandma” Gatewood hiked entire length of the Appalachian Trail (2,168 miles) with a home-made duffle bag slung over her shoulder and a pair of Keds sneakers.
She was 67 at the time.
She hiked it again in 1960, and then 1963 at age 75.
Good equipment can make things a little easier at time, but it’s all about simplicity. It’s about living… DELIBERATELY.
The decisions you make in the wilderness have direct nd often immediate impact on your well being. Not the same for our mundane everyday life… which shirt to wear, what song to listen to on the radio.
But hey, if that’s your cup of tea, enjoy it. There’s something for everyone on this earth.
Peace.
This is very funny, as I grew up in Montana, we camped all the time, as kids we loved it its very fun. We even camped in the middle of winter during hunting season.
As this blog has a kinda racial hue to it, and I know there are a lot of people from different back grounds, I ask you to please visit my blog and veiw the blog “Kramer goes buck wild” I really want some opinions. Thank you.
http://blogs.myspace.com/cue_1979
ewww girls I don’t like either… i like me some he-man meat yo straight in my mouth while I stem off strobe lights and listen to loud noises….
yoink.
i love to stick goats up my ass too!! chunky, we have so much in common! Let me be your white bread and you can stick your man meat in my buns anytime….
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
I think cock is awesome too, especially in my mouth!! chunky, we have so much in common! Let me be your white bread and you can stick your man meat in my buns anytime….
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink.+
Michael D, you are the darkest bump on your moms fat butt and it is time you apologize to all the fine people on this site. We endured your stupidity for far too long and now it’s time to PAY WHAT YOU OWE! (where have i heard that before?) 😉 You stole my name and said stupid things, attempting to smear my already humble name. You posted the lamest comments known to mankind and hijacked entire sites for your own stupid amusment. Well judgement day is here, I see your sorry but decided to run like the wuss that you are, but not before you pay what you owe. I still have my name BEEEEOTCH, what about you? YOu can dish it but you can’t take it. You want US to leave you alone dummy, APOLOGIZE. Apologize for being a moron, for being a blogging terrorist who writes boring post, for calling me UH HUH and other folks on this site. If your dumb butt can’t figure out that their was more than one person sticking foot up you ass, then your a moron. It’s a shame that the best post ever posted with YOUR name were writen by other people. So apologize and all will right with the world again. We found you once, we will do it again.
“and you will know my name as the LORD, when I lay my vengence upon thee”
Sweet dreams sweetheart
🙂
Just like hayrides, I try to convince myself that I should like camping. And just like hayrides, when the experience is over, I am left feeling itchy, dirty, and a little sick of so much “togetherness.”
I had a college professor from Nigeria and he made a funny comment about camping that stuck with me. He explained that when he would go back to visit his hometown he would be without most of the amenities we enjoy here. He said it was like a vacation to live here, with a soft bed and full utilities, and he couldn’t understand why people here enjoy voluntarily going out into the middle of nowhere, sleeping on the ground without running water, a refrigerator, etc. when many people have no choice but to live without those things. I thought it was an interesting perspective on American life.
you thought wrong
http://nonwhiteguilt.blogspot.com/
One who calls oneself LORD, must have some inferiority complex.
You are just a little loser, so your vengeance (notice spelling) is meaningless. I would suggest you try a woman. Pop your pimples get out there and enjoy your little lonesome self.
haha. Check out this funny new site http://makefunofmyfriends.com
I would suggest that you try me! I may be a guy but everybody calls me a pussy. Just fuck me like the pussy that I am, please…
And you will know the taste of my dick, when I shove it upon you and all down your throat like the beeeotch you are. Oh yeah, “FUCK YOU” Duck of prunes. (Notice spellings)
white people suck. we lost our will to live a longtime ago.
Is this Tucker Max’s new blog? I can’t wait for the film!
yo!
TRUE DAT WIGGA!
i hate tucker max! jk!
or check out dailymachoDOTcom
Serious homophobic problems, again find a girl to play with your little dickie. Continued success with your life as a class A LOSER!
Hilarious 😀
thank you, jack off, motherfucker.
Hi Folks!
The only (and the last) white country in the world — extant to the present day — is Russia.
See this website:
http://www.russian-victories.ru
Cheers!
Michael Kuznetsov
Hey Duke of Pussys, I don’t have a serious homophobic problem. I let people be people and do what they do. I enjoy pissing off ASSHOLES like yourself who enjoy sticking their nose where it don’t belong. My post was aimed at a specific individual, so why the hell are you jumping in dumbass. Your the one with no life because all you can do is sit at your PATHETIC computer table and stick your nose in other peoples business. If I am a loser, you of all people, would know because the devil knows his own. Loser. Oh yeah, find another dick to suck beeeotch.
camping = paying to live like a homeless person in the woods for a few days
Hey boy and I do mean boy, still a boy, anyway boy when posting on a blog read around the world you will not get much privacy or one on one here. Boy you needs to get yourself in a chat room, maybe a gay chat room for you, as you seem to enjoy writing about gay oral sex. Be a good boy and go along.
Does shooting up under an overpass count as camping out? If so I am quite the camper. Also had a romance with a fellow camper, a rather obese homeless mexican woman, who would do anything, anything for a half of can of beer, really nice, thats living. The fucking diaries of the rifleman. just about to nod off, where is my rifle? Probably under fat mexican again. Barack help us.
You need Jebus.
PUT YO COCK IN MY ASS DAWGG!
All people like to own a 2000 sq. foot home paid by a simple mortgage, have a spouse for life and 2.5 kids to follow your footsteps in life, and able to retire with enough money to live on until they part. What’s with camping is better? +
This made me laugh, because just the other day I was thinking to myself; I really want to go camping. I guess that proves it, I am totally white 🙂 However I really do love camping, maybe it was growing up in the northwest that did it, I think only quintessential white people live there, they match everything on here.
Hey beeeeotch and I do mean beeeeeotch, still a beeeeotch, when responding to a blog not addressed to you, don’t get surprised when you get a foot shoved up your butt. You needs to mind your own business before things go from bad to worse for you duck of prunes. (and i do mean DUCK) You seem to enjoy reading about gay oral sex, you getting flashbacks from hot steamy man love from your past. Be a good beeeeeotch and take a short leap of a deep cliff.
Just got back from a trip to the Great Smokey Mountains and this is hilarious.
This is awesome. I was just thinking about going to camp..
You could go out and camp with just a sleeping bag. Ever thought about that?
I’ve seen black people camping….guess they must be whites in disguise…
Why are so many white people ashamed of their skin color? Seriously, some people on this site act like it’s a curse.
White pride forever, motherfuckers.
Get back in your RV, fool.
THats a bad muthafuka
Spaamers……kill yo selfs
Buy SHAMWOW!
Hey Hesh, get your steriotypes correct, it’s trailer.
Is that how you justify living in a trailer park Mickael Deeeznutsnurmouth?+
I used to love camping! Does that mean I am becoming less white or moving out of that phase of whiteness?
shut yo mouth!
but I’m just talkin’ bout Chunky…
(Theme from Shaft)
Who is tha man
who let others put their dicks in this mans?
The real Michael d.?
Damn Right!
camping is great. I like to wear funny t-shirts, when I canoe, i bought, paddle faster I hear banjos from Bad Idea T Shirts
I was on a camping trip where a guy dressed like Cookie Monster walked through our camp site asking for cookies. At first most of us were in our tents and one guy left at the campfire encountered this ferocious beast.
Side note: If it hasn’t already been added, “Reading and Laughing at lists of Stuff White People Like” should be added to Stuff White People Like. 🙂
If I was to write a book like this and entitle it ” Things native People like”, or select some other culture, I would be considered a racist and probably face numorous lawsuits, but, I guess that this is acceptable for any non-caucasion person or group of people.
Hey Chuckles, read the whole “Camping” post before you comment!
Are you really being that victimized as a white man that you just had to add this comment?
Yes, we live in a very litigious society. Yes, you probably would get sued if you published a “Things Native People Like” book. But guess what, white Americans (I am also one of them) have oppressed and discriminated against minorities, in ways that have affected their jobs, safety, and lifestyle for a few hundred years. Because of our past, minorities actually have a basis to bring in the race issue. So would it kill you to shut your smart-ass mouth about their advantage over us in lawsuits for one moment?
What a dick move. Way to ruin something funny.
Hey woah, kiss my ass.
I actually disagree with him. Most cultural groups have self critiquing based humour. Upper middle class white people didn’t have this. I think the reason that this page and book became so popular so quick was because it filled a void.
I just stumbled across this blog and I cannot stop laughing. This stuff is pure gold. Can’t wait to finish devouring the early stuff.
Just as soon as finish drinking my Starbucks and getting my pedicure.
Get off your high horse Charlie Charleston.
This statement is false: “Because of our past, minorities actually have a basis to bring in the race issue.”
Nothing in my past would cause anyone to bring in the race issue. I’m not sure about your past. Maybe you’ve done some things that would give people the right to bring in the race issue. Don’t lump me in with you, buddy.
Just read another riotous parody of Stuff White People Like at FreedomHaters.org.
Their SWL entries include: Sickle Cell Anemia, A Thesaurus, and the IFC sketch group The Whitest Kids U Know. Had me in stitches!
I recommend checking it here:
http://www.freedomhaters.org/content/once-again-yet-another-salute-stuff-white-people
White people aren’t afraid of wildlife.
You realize that, by that logic, you can pretty much justify the treatment of the Jews in the minds of anti-Semites, right? The pogroms, the ghettos, the Shoah…
Why can’t individuals just be individuals? Can’t people just think for themselves and not be defined first and foremost as members of groups? I don’t see why I, someone who was born long after those injustices, should have to pay for the sins of people who may or may not be my ancestors. Why should I do penance for sins I never committed?
I’m sick of the racists and the racialists on all sides. The KKK, the Black Panthers, Mecha, whatever, fuck all those weak-minded little shits.
…
Why, yes, my skin is white, and I do like camping. Why do you ask?
Are you so insecure in your identity that you can only derive pride from the amount of a certain chemical in a fatty membrane?
GET FUCKED FAGGOT!
It’s “worst case” scenario, not “worse case”.
It never cease to amaze me how you honkies get mad at white person who shows some sensitivity to people of color. Lets put it in terms you can better understand, shall we. If the brothas floated over to Europe and snatched all the white folks they could get, bring them to another country and work them like a ‘SLAVE’ for four hundred years. Then for the next hundred some years, kept the white man down, once the white folk do get some diginty after shedding blood, sweat and tears, they would want to shown some respect. Not have black panthers burning fist in the front yard. Not blacks in white face eating yogurt and smelling like a wet dog. Police pulling over every white male driving for no reason, and basically becoming the scapegoat for a country. Yeah, not a nice picture. But that’s reality for non-whites. So, what have you learned besides it being alright to be white? Let me tell you, if you oppress someone long enough, anger becomes strength, and eventually, they will rise up like a phynix in the sky. Who would have thought, a black man would be in the white house. I don’t care how racist you are, how bitter you are. Fact is, history will ALWAYS show a black man ran this country. From the slave house to the white house. Chew on that, and one more to grow on. “always bet on black”.
Keep your damn forty acres and a mule, we will take 50 states and a white house”
“Why should I do penance for sins I never committed?”
Because you get the benefit of them.
Just because some crazed hillbilly rednecks treated other people in the past so poorly, doesn’t mean that WE deserve the backlash of it.
Everyone needs to grow the fuck up and start making the world better instead of worrying about who fucked up their great great great grandparents. You’re no better for giving white people shit for being racist. And to you white people who give the “well we were bad to them in the past” kind of bullshit, just wait until you experience the racism first hand like I have for being white. We’re all fucking human and we have no reason to be treated poorly because of past generations.
You are obviously the wrong kind of white person and therefore cannot relate to the zeitgeist of this weblog.
Do you have a matching tramp tag an F250 with a brittle mall cruiser lift kit and .357 that will probably snap your wrist when trying to stop your boyfriend from beating you again? I suggest if you really need to stop him with lead, go for the post-recall Steelhawks, flush the meth before calling 911 and not screaming at the cops if the C.O.P.S. camera crew shows up.
Is the show called COPS or C.O.P.S or something else these days? I got rid of my television some time ago.
I believe that camping is a voluntary activity.
I concur.
Camping is strictly a voluntary activity. I would like to believe that an intelligent person would actually know the difference between a camp site and an urban disaster area.
BTW there were tons white people in Mississippi and Alabama “camping” after Katrina.
Then what about the white people who hike the Appalachian Trail?
…and yet, not one person besides you actually cares.
I’m sorry but can you write that in English please? I’m studying Japanese and Spanish but I have yet to reach the level of proficiency necessary to translate your post. Sayonara y Gracias, Gringo-san. 😀
Yes they are.
Camping typically involves going somewhere real homeless people cannot afford to travel. The only real homeless people one should expect to see while camping are aboriginals, teenage runaways and paranoid white separatists.
Can you people all get along and have this serious downer of a barfight somewhere else?
Food spoilage is rarely a problem if you are vegan.
The wrong kind of white people can often solve this problem by killing small game and consuming the critter in the field, which is ironically, what aboriginals would do.
Indeed. That is what the kayak and the Yakima rack is for.
It’s a comment worth absolutely nothing.
Maybe if you didn’t want to be enslaved you should have invented guns.
So what? How does benefiting from something make you responsible for it?
Nice blog! I’m white and I can confirm most of these entries.
I’d be angry, DARKMAN. I’d scream ’til my lungs gave out, rend my garnments, and vow vengence on those monsters who committed all those crimes against my people. But then I’d calm down, realizing that all the screaming and bouncing off the walls had gotten me nowhere but back where I started, that those who committed all those crimes were now long dead and gone to their deserts. It’d feel good to yell at their bones, but, at the end of the day, it’d just be yelling at bones.
I’d ultimately accept the hand dealt to me, but not resign my fate. I’d realize that I am more than my skin color, more than my ancestry, more than history, that I am, above all, ConchordsFan (follow me on this one). I’d look around and think to myself “how do I get myself out of this?” Eventually, I’d realize the only way out of my predicament was to…well…suck it up, tell myself “I ain’t got time to bleed”, stay on the straight and narrow, and work my ass off at school and at work. I’d realize that all those losers telling me that studying and working hard was just “acting black” and that I was an “Uncle Umaru” and that the best I could hope for was a government handout were dimwits, unwittingly playing into the hands of the black supremacists thanks to the soft bigotry of low expectations.
Would I be comfortable? No! Would I fall on my ass a bunch of times? Yeah! Would there be a chance I might totally blow it? Yeah, but at least I’d have a better chance of getting out of the ghetto than I would have if I just sat around able-bodied and whined ’til I decided to call it fate and keep on drinking. I’d pray for courage, wisdom, and strength and begin to quietly pull myself out of the mess I was in.
Would I encounter racist shits who were convinced of my inferiority? Yeah, a bunch of ’em. But that would just make outperforming and outclassing them that much more satisfying. I’d give the blacks I met the chance to prove themselves not to be idiots, and roll my eyes at those failed to do so. I’d follow the Golden Rule, keep my head own, and keep on keeping on.
I’d marry a woman I loved, and treat her like the most beautiful woman on Earth, regardless of her skin color. In the end, as I lay dying, I’d crack a half smile, say to myself, “I sure squeezed that lemon. And the camping was AMAZING!”
This “honky”, as you so classily put it, does not deny that some vile, vile atrocities were visited upon blacks in America. Slavery, lynchings, Jim Crow, these all constitute America’s original sin. As much as you may think I am a racist, I can assure you through this veil of electronic obscurity that I am not.
I’m simply someone who believes in the power of the individual to be able to take charge of their life. That power, DARKMAN, is in you, and in everyone, regardless of race, creed, or color.
/soapbox off
Leave it to white people to invent everything, except peanut butter. Only white people have been to the moon. Has Nairobi started their space program? Hell, most black countries can’t even produce clean water or a functioning waste system. Moon crickets are a drain on the world. Thank God for AIDS, right?
This is priceless, one would have to frequent some inner city ghetto shit hole to enjoy such low wit discourse. The “beeeeotch” I recognize as the parlance of an uneducated low brow ghetto dweller. The suck dick comments are made by ten year old white males, I hope you have not been influenced by suburban white children, I guess you have, why else would you be on a blog about WHITE people? Also how you copy other people’s style, lacks any creativity, I mean one thing the bro’s have is style, but not you. Well cheers to you, you failure of a failed race.
Yeah you got a point, however I hate these liberal cock smoking type whites.
Fuck’em I just don’t pay any attention to them, like they don’t matter, and they don’t in the productive world.
honestly….i’ve been camping with white people….shit…camping in general. it was THE biggest waste of time and a massive pointless hassle. i’d rather go on a date, wack off, burn myself with an iron.
You needs alittle freakout time if you whites.
Sniff, excuse me while I wipe the tear from my eye Concordsfan. No, I am not going to call you a racist, long winded, but not racist. I am not angry, I enjoy being the DARKNESS, I also enjoy knowing that the we have a black President. As you can read below this post, several of your redneck cousins are not as understanding as you claim to be. I sense frustration with the brothas, but I will let you slide sense you attempt to give them a chance. Not all that is black has common sense, same goes for whites too. I too, believe in the power of the individual and judge accordingly. So, on that note, allow me to judge these crackers with a not so understanding spirit.
Who needs a gun when I got a foot to shove up your cracker ass. Blacks were building pyramids when YOUR ancestors were living in caves and scratching their ass. Besides, all a brotha has to do is just bitch slap your lilly white ass and take YOUR gun, and rob you with it. Who needs forty acres and a mule, when I can rob you of all your money and have a good day. Hell, the media portrays blacks as monsters, why not capitalize on it. Right? Watch your back.
Again I say, Blacks were building pyramids when YOUR ancestors were living in caves and scratching their ass and saying ugah bugah. Your right, things have not been looking too rosey for the motherland, but lets not forget where the birth place of civilization is, Africa. Who lives in Africa? It’s ok whiteman, you can answer. Brothas. So, if the birth place of civilization and mankind for that matter is from Africa, that makes Eurotrash like yourself, a cheap immatation of the real thing. May a bubanic plague infested hamster get shoved up your ass.
always bet on black cracker.
Hey Klement, don’t worry, no body pays attention to you either. Like you don’t matter, and you don’t in the productive world. But you fit right on in, in the land of the dumbass.
always bet on black bitch..
ps…. enjoying your BLACK PRESIDENT of the Productive World?
Actually Anon, it don’t make you responsible for anything. YOU JUST GET STUCK WITH THE CONSEQUENSES AND THE BILL!!!
keep your forty acres and mule, we will take 50 states and a white house.
The one thing I could never understand was the attraction that white people have to camping. There is nothing enjoyable about it. I’m confused about why white people go on holidays first of all give that 9/10 you come back tired and stressed because of all that is involved. Screw that, I’d sooner chill out at home for 2 weeks without having to deal with all that crap.
white people love meth! check out my new guilty pleasure and have a laugh at http://www.fatkidsfalling.com
As an avid camper and a rather light complected individual, I can attest to the fact that most fellow campers are white.
I’ll do it! He must have such a soft butt.
You guys haven’t added “cheap labor” to this list yet?
I’m white too, but here’s the difference. I’m not a white liberal. This website should change its name to “Stuff White Liberals Like”.
Just look at the list and ask yourself if you were in Wyoming, Texas (except for Austin), or Alaska if these are the things white people would like. Hell no!
How about this as the next entry on the list of stuff white people like:
#129 The Website “Stuff White People Like”
#129 “Saying ‘This is sooooo true!’ in reference to this website.
People in Wyoming don’t go camping?
Another person so very proud of their shitty, shitty taste in humor.
Seriously. “Oh, I mustn’t go camping because I will offend Nigerians or people who don’t have running water” or “I should sit on my ass and not enjoy life at all because otherwise some bitter Brooklynite douchebag will mock me for living my life”. Get fucked.
Jesus Fucking Christ. So if I jizz some incoherent bullshit about how everybody who lives in brooklyn has their heads lodged firmly in their own asses into wordpress, some douchebag will give me a book deal? Awesome.
So fuck off and do it. Why the fuck are you posting this?
Yep, and a dumbass like yourself will read it. What’s your point fuckofflander?
So if its so easy, than go get yourself a book deal and quite bitching. Another thing white people like, thinking they could have written anything better themselves
So this is my first time looking at this site and after reading and laughing at dozens of posts & hundreds of comments I have several general comments:
1. Very funny
2. All these posts are really only applicable to a certain type of white person, as has been pointed out in many other comments. Middle-class, semi-educated sort of white people, not white trash, most Europeans (though some posts apply) and white people who for some reason aren’t considered really white, like Italians & Greeks.
3. The funniest part is all the mad comments!!! Oh! Some of them are funnier than the posts! Really, how can you read any of this and get mad? If you’re not exactly like one of these stereotypes then you’re just like everyone else who’s not like “their” stereotype. And if someone else’s post offends you then laugh! I’m really hoping someone is offended by mine because all this laughing makes me want to go camping.
camping used to be the kind of shit the “wrong kind of white people” did because they couldn’t afford to take their kids on vacation. now that their conservative asses have made a bunch of money working unionized manual labor jobs, they can afford the RVs and other bullshit that the “right kind of white people” currently scorn in favor of old fashioned tent camping, crowding the shores of lake nacimiento and other white trash havens with their multitude of buzzing generators as the haughty bourgeois look down their noses at them and drive hybrid SUVs to national forests miles from their homes. people are all so fucking stupid; who cares if they’re white or whatever? another thing white people love to do, whether they’re liberal or conservative, rich or poor, is make fun of minorities when there are none around. but guess what? get a room full of mexican dudes who think they’re alone, and you’ll have a lot of shit talking about some dumbass gringos.
I see black people camping out all the time! In front of my house, in front of stores, they are everywhere! It’s crazy!
this is bananas…I laugh every time I read these posts…have you been to http://www.justjiving.com
I hate camping and I’m white.
But this is hilarious
You’re not black, you’re racist….porch monkey.
Cool story bro.
“All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called
a philosopher.”
Ambrose Bierce
Stuff white people like: Getting a book deal, getting lazy, not blogging anymore, fading back into obscurity with piles of money.
I know a not so bad place to camp out in the mountains at Tucalota Springs east of Temecula in southern Cal. They got a pool other than the springs, an open view (visibility at 10 miles to the north or east), a hay ride pulled by a tractor & a small fence to block access of wild animals (I heard packs of coyotes all night) from getting in. Yip-pi-yay-yee-yah-yi!+
There should be one on mittens. White people LOVE their nice wool mittens.
BRILLIANT!
Don’t mittens and camping go hand in hand…pardon the pun! Maybe that’s just in Canada!
Chas
http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com
My parents were avid back-packers, my in-laws are avid RV campers, man am I gonna have some messed up white children!
I SAW THAT SITE TOO… TOO TRUE!!!
Yip-pi-yay-yee-yah-yi!+!!!!!! That’s the sound of the coyotes screwing me in the ass. +
My first thought reading this was about Christopher McCandless. He was a hobo and camper who went into Denali National Park and Preserve in Alaska and starved to death because he chose not to bring a map and a compass.
His story inspired the book Into the Wild starring Emile Hirsch. The movie adaptation of the book was a huge critical success, and while I’m sure the film is a brilliant dramatic work, the bottom line is that McCandless died because he made a stupid decision about basic camping tools that resulted in his getting lost and dying a painful death. And, just like you said in the article, there was both a book and a movie deal, because White People consider this a _positive_ thing.
Great site, by the way. I love it dearly!
Wow! this has made my day… I have been enlightened and awakened through a few moments of reading a very witty bit of writing on white people etc… thanks so much … please do some more stuff that has this kinda tongue in cheek, wild and funny expression…
These are just things EVERYBODY likes.
this website is like a train wreck – its ignorant and fascinating, know many people of other races may or may not enjoy these activities, but there is no reason to say they are only white. just because you haven’t had the exposure – doesn’t mean its not fun. at least if i had to camp – I could, if I need clean and fresh water, i can find it. white and proud. give me jazz, outdoors, and great coffee, preferably not starbucks, remember I am white, the more unique the better
I’m known in my neighboredHood as a Caucasional…and I Like to camp too!!! NEEDS: one (1) sleeping bag, one (!) credit card, one(!) poncho and a whore…and I’m good.
I see lots of non white people camping, they just do it in the streets.
please will someone rename this blog to stuff hipsters like
In this context white people =histpers, you fucking idiot.
See, themajority of hipsters ARE white people, and even those with different skin tones are white in every other aspect of their personalities.
But then again, you clearly understand that and just wanna be one of the idiots who pretends not to understand that. WHy you douches bags do it I don’t know, don’t care.
You’re probly just White.
Worst case scenarios include: … encountering an RV … it involves an encounter with the wrong kind of white people.
White People don’t like RVs. ANything that makes you comfortable while being in nature is bad.
There are already a bunch of hipster blogs. This one is fine just the way it is… well, needs to be updated more often though. 😉
It is incredible that the white race has survived this long!
If Darwinism were only allowed to run its natural course…
Social Darwinism/Eugenics is not a positive thing. I also can’t believe that you think all white people are like this, it is naive to think so. Also, be careful with the term race, because biologically there is not a division of the so called “races”; it is just a constructed category of our minds.
Race is a Linnean biological categorization – all of which are constructs (kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, genus, species). A race, unlike other biological classifications, is an in-breeding group. This means that, a member of one race (say a Basset Hound), bred only with others of the same race, will produce offspring of that race. BUT they can interbreed with other races of the same species (say a Great Dane) and produce FERTILE offspring. This is why donkeys and horses are different species — they can interbreed (mules) but those offspring are not fertile.
That said, there most certainly is a biological division between races. To breed intentionally toward “improving” in humans is, unquestionably a mistake (eugenics). It’s done all the time in other flora and fauna.
“White” is not a race, it’s a color.
Well I certainly feel more enlightened, thank you both.
And I feel a bit whiter.
Isn’t that ironic??
blogs that over-educated, pretentious, white-guilt-suffering, deuce-bags like
I have never seen a black RV owner. Ever
I am so white and I love camping and I am a geologist and I drive a subru but I dont understand why so many white people love the neti pot. Salt water in the nose.
You mean the black president of the most indebted nation in the history of the world, with the plunging currency? Better keep printing that worthless money. Don’t pay attention to productive white people who have been moving their investments to non-dollar denominative assets. When your president defaults on the debt it will be worse than Katrina, you will all be out there crying and yelling for help, of course the smart bro’s will be raping and looting.
The most well armed people in the history of the world (white people) have nothing to fear from the likes of you.
You know what white people really like? People who update blogs regularly 🙂 (And emoticons)
I hate camping and come from a long list of white people.
let me clarify, I hate camping that involves set up time of over 2 hours. I hate camping that involves being in the woods for over 2 days.
How hard is it to camp with a small tent and a couple of sleeping bags? Not very.
How hard is it to camp in a tent that has more rooms then some apartments? VERY
Plus I can lay blankets out on the floor and camp….
I pay rent and own a bed…that sounds better.
I read 3 of your posts before I realized just how racist and not-funny this blog is. I’m disappointed in myself.
As my white friend just did the other day, please refer to Mountain Equipment Co-op as “MEC” from now on because it shows that you shop there often and can’t be bothered to say Mountain Equipment Co-op over and over.
Signed, a (white) fan
P.S. Don’t listen to those people who call you racist – your posts are hilarious and oh-so-true!
waaaaaaahhhh… i wasted a half hour on the internet… waaaaaahhhhhhhhhh….
will Darcy do?
Not as white as going to the cottage. Unless you’re out west
I like camping. I think it’s another one of those ways to feel like you’re accomplishing something without actually doing anything useful.
A bit about myself: I’m white with a #47. In Drama (see #43). In college I went to lots of #21, where I studied the nature of #50 and learned to #82. I did #72, and my boyfriend did so as well, in #58. Now I live in #91, where I have lots of #54, am careful about #64, and am looking to buy a #61 (because I can’t afford #60). I’m a huge fan of #8, and if the Republicans take power I will #75 because of the #94. I like to spend my free time with some #24 or #33, enjoying some #35, #10, or #109. Of course, this is all on my #106.
Holy crap, I’m white. I mean really, really white. (Have fun looking up the number references if you want to. My #55 if it’s boring.)
deuce-bags…I love it!
I believe the correct term is “colostomy bag”
Haha brilliant! And so true 🙂
I love this! I actually do love camping, and while some people do camp like this, I do it rarely. Backpacking is not nearly so luxurious.
I have started a website as part of a class project with some tips on how to do this slightly less white version of backpacking. Although, there is a higher risk of the whole being killed by an animal thing 🙂
Speaking of camping, did you hear the story about the deer that crashed through a school window in West Virginia and trashed the classroom? Camping sounds like so much fun…
The story can be found at http://detentionslip.org
Bwahahahahahahaha!
*NOT GUILTY* (Finally)
If you’re white, then you are guilty….by association.
But we’ll give you probation for acting without knowing.
wat happened to MikeD?
glad to c your still around.
no we ride our overloaded bikes with paniers with outdoor technical clothing that we spent hundreds of dollars on.
you should have said
‘it lets white people have an actual use for their gore tex and headlamps that they bought at rei’
you should re-write this article – it could be a lot better
ahhh. all too true! I had one of these experiences at a twice-yearly event with many of my young cool white friends, called PDF which occurs in Delaware twice a year. It was not quite as bad as what is described in the post because everyone was high and most of the women were naked and there were games and some free food. But the rest applies.
Correction to tehpeople: this article was awesome. Needs no improvement. I’ve got a stuffwhitepeoplelike article title: “Getting a feeling of importance by suggesting things that should have been in an article and then telling the author to rewrite it.”
Apparently us whiteys only like to go “car camping” which, if you’ve been, is pretty much setting up camp in a parking lot and then pitching a tent 10 feet away, with 300 other people within 500 yards all doing the same. So it’s sorta like tailgating at a football game but with tents. I love it.
http://ourannoyingworld.com/
I’m not white but I love this site. It’s funny as hell!
P.S. I don’t you’re a racist. Everyone reserves the right to be proud of their culture regardless of what that maybe, and that includes the Whites.:)
This site is a riot…I am white, and I am from a mountainous region. We do not do the store bought camping adventure bit…we do it pretty much the way our ancestors did. We do have sleeping bags, tents, some lights and provisions, but we pride on doing it old style. We kill or catch our food, wash in the river, no blow dryers or hair gel, no tv etc. Nevertheless, many whites are urban campers; we are not pure like the wild wild west either. But damn, everything on this site rings true in some ways to all of us….I do not relish in admitting it, but it is true…your insight is brilliant. I try to avoid these tags, and always will, but somehow they ring true……….and I laugh very loudly. Keep it coming, man you are right on it!!!
white is not a culture. DUH.
MY CARTOONS ARE SUPER COMIC
BORINGHEXAGON.WORDPRESS.COM
COME. PLEASE…
“looking at history, the instances of my people encountering white people in the woods have not worked out very well for us”
Looking at current crime statistics, the instances of white people encountering non-white people in urban areas have not worked out very well for us.
Best thing about camping: fishing!
Next best thing about camping: no urban non-whites!
I’m the wrong kind of white person and am pleased as bunch.
The thing white people like the most is building civilizations that generate so much wealth and freedom that it gives non-whites the illusion they can do it themselves.
Haha a lot of that is true but I’m actually a very poor white person (not to be confused for white trash) so camping has always been real cheap and in fact, simple. Actually my family and I were homeless once and we lived at a campground for practically a whole summer before we moved. I’m not complaining here though. I just find it conducive to my comment. Ever since then, I haven’t really enjoyed camping much. I do notice that some people are way too extravagant when they camp. It’s ridiculous for sure.
I agree that white is not a culture lol. In fact, white people don’t really have their own culture. We tend to steal it from everyone else.
I will admit, a lot of what this guy says about white people does apply to me..just not the fake stuff that we do to appease other whites or anyone else for that matter.
Nonetheless, I find this site humorous. What kind of world would this be if we can’t make fun of ourselves and others?
Oh and also, yes I have allergies! lol
I wonder why white people tend to have them more…..
Since I’ve lived at a campground, it did make me a bit immune to not sleeping well on the ground. I went to a festival once and I was the only person that slept well in our tent 🙂
you do not have to pay entrance fees at most national park in the us and renting camping equipment or buying it second hand at a garage sale/thrift store is always an option.
Camping is camping. You also know what civilized ( white people do ) write and respond to pro-homo threads like this one.
I just can’t get into sleeping in the woods with bears and bugs.
http://www.buyrefurbtoday.com/
You, sir, have true insight. I salute you.
this is great! my friend just asked me to go camping with her and i’m hesitant… she’s not white but i’m gonna forward her this article so she knows where i’m coming from when i say i have doubts – and it’s because i’ve been camping and i prefer a warm shower and soft bed – but love the beautiful sky on a clear night…. so i’m still considering it…
I’m a vampire… I’ve found that my people’s contact with whites (and to be honest, various other races) has been nutritious.
Nevertheless, I can understand the point about not wanting to run into the wrong kind of white people in the woods. Those corn-fed country boys give me indigestion.
Good lord yes..this whole thing cracked me up. all my white friends have garages full of this crap which they make sure they let me know what it is and how much it costs. but the part that makes me laugh the most is your comment about the allergies. i’m not from here so when i came to the U.S. i noticed that they are ALL allergic from almost everything. there’s about 10 nasal allergy commercials every minute. hilarious. yet somehow they seem to think this is normal but it just fascinates me.
I love that in theory camping should be inexpensive but a stroll through REI on any given weekend and you find the weekend warriors loading up on Sigg bottles, expedition packs, North Face tents, jackets, sleeping bags, roof racks and of course the canoe. I write for StuffRichPeopleLove.com and while camping isn’t the domain of rich people you sure don’t see a lot of poor people camping, except under bridges! Pack up the Audi kids, we’re getting in touch with nature.
http://makefunofmyfriends.com We got stuff white people will like.
I just came across this blog. Seems to me that “stuff white people like” is a stuff white people like. It has all the ingredients, even, it appears, a steady scource of income, needed to be a marriage candidate.
I wish I was clever enough to make a real ironic witticism here.
that was fun! thanks 😉
It’s a way of life.
The white-guilt/white-loathing/white-insecurity is pathetic. Thanks for giving us your country. 🙂
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I think walking trails could be accompanied with this. White people LOVE walking trails.
The best part of this site is that non-white people read it and then realize how white they really are.
exactly…I am way more white than I have let on
I wonder if this site is run by white people? If so, awesome! If not, who’s the sell out uncle tom that started this? Either way, it’s pretty funny. Good job.
Hilarious parody of Stuff White People Like @ True/Slant:
http://trueslant.com/harmonleon/2009/10/29/a-salute-to-stuff-white-people-like/
This is such a funny site and this piece had tears rolling down my cheeks. I have been living in US for last 14 years and have refused to go on any camping trip at the risk of sounding so un-cool but now I feel so much better. So thank you!
I would love to see an indian site like this. Its all about being able to laugh at yourself.
Latiaynna….i dont think you could possibly be white with a name like that…no offense
Simply awesome. LOL
I would have to say this blog had me rolling. Damn near crying. Though it is funny, I am white and I do enjoy camping. Go figure right. I grew up in Colorado and started camping at age 3 with my dad. Now that i look back on my years spent in Colorado before growing up and living abroad, those years camping with my dad are my favorite and most treasured memories i have of living their. Well camping and yes hunting and fishing. Though when it came to camping, my pops and I had never really spent all that much money. As it is my daily clothes are made for the outdoors, you know the usual things, boots, Dickie jeans and flannel. I really do enjoy the outdoors. I sleep better and feel refreshed before going back to work. Never really had an issue with being lost. Not in the woods anyway. I have been lost several times around the world though. Like Tokyo for instance. Most of my camping now is done either with friends, my girlfriend, or by myself. When i camp alone I feel closer to God. So it has a more spiritual affect on me. Also I enjoy the beauty of nature. Thats when i start drawing landscapes or the wildlife I see. Needless to say, camping is a big part of this white guys life.
Whatever you say, dieversity (WASPy) student who dropped the “ad” because it sounded too corporate. Enjoy the sound of Indians (cross that out), Coyotes out in the hills from your tent site at night. What about the white tribe known as “Goths” named for barbarian Germanic pagans? Be out in nature, or so the white Celtic neopagans say.
How white of you to assume there’s no such thing as “races” or to put it in this way: Don’t talk about the black people please, that’s not nice. Sure, all races of people in sociopolitical or cultural terms are the same species of homo sapiens, but it’s idiotic for diversity/sensitivity training people implant that “no race/diversity” confusion stance.
hahahahahahahahahahaha Tiara, I thought the same thing!!!!
Geetch…sooooooooooooo much to share!
But you’re not Mark, sorry.
Visit W3Schools!
I say toooooooooooo much
wow – same exact thought
but really people, hiking/camping/backpacking can be the best
its not for everyone, but it still is possible to go outside and have a good time with friends and explore and chill
For anyone in the Twin Cities area, if you want to have a guilt free few hours and enjoy whiteness to the full, may I suggest rding the Cannon Valey Trail, one of the very best bike trails in the USA. 20 miles long, paved, scenic, beside-a-river, and best of all at mile 8.5 there’s a genuine camping area, complete with all the amenities for the comfort of working class white folks! Ditch yer guilt and enjoy cross-class pollination! You might even run into a few WC whites on the trail; during hunting season the WC whites (and Hmong) like to drape the deer carcasses across trailers they pull behind mountain bikes.
Ok, I went to that http://www.justjiving.com site, that guy is hilarious
This is spot=on, as my DD would say.
I did my share of camping in the 70’s, and lived to tell the story.
Why would I EVER go back???
I was once accused of camping, but I think people were talking about the way I walked
I love camping
White people are crazy, camping is just paying to be a hobo. The only person I would camp with is Penelope Cruz, and she would have to sign a notarized statement that we would get it on during the trip. Mosquitoes, scorpions, snakes, fleas, ticks, disease, bears, no running water – there are many reasons not to camp. Another stupid thing white people are enamoured with is hiking, this is camping in motion, just as retarded but more exhausting.
This is pathetic. It isn’t funny. It isn’t clever. It isn’t timely. My guess is you’re just another liberal douche with two friends and doting parents who tell him/her/it they are relevant. Are you suppose to be…what? Minorities?
shut tha fuck up.
AH! I have thought I was alone in understanding the stupidity of camping. Growing up, my parents loved me, so they never took me camping. Now that I am grown and moved out of the house, my friends all want to go camping on the weekend… for fun. I don’t completely understand them. We go through a whole week being completely stress, taking tests, and staying up all night sleeping, and they want to go camping- where we will be stressed trying to figure out what to do with our full bladders, passing fire starting and tent building tests, and staying up all night because we are frozen and trapped inside a bag. Personally, I don’t think camping is a white thing- It is just a stupid thing. People spends thousands of dollars on a house for a reason.
HA! I love this style of writing…very enjoyable for people who are able to make fun of themselves…
Hey you guys need to check this site out…. http://jusjivin.com that guy is so funny and random. Thanks goldfinger.
this must be the most racist thing i’ve read in a long time. applies to the whole blog, i suppose.
I can’t believe how many people read these entries and take them seriously. LOL.
Are you serious?
This is so hilarious.
Kudos man
…as with everything in white culture, the more simple it appears the more expensive it actually is.
So, so true. LOL.
Um…it’s satire. These entries could easily refer to any middle class folk of any race. A lot of it applies to me.
I love coffee, camping, sea salt, and Bob Marley just as a start. And quite independently of any white folks I know.
I’m a white guy and I really enjoy camping. Growing up my Dad and Uncles took my brothers and I camping and fishing and hunting. We used to hike into the High Lakes and camp and fish for a week or more at a time. Good times. Plan to do the same with my kids.
Of course that kind of camping is a far cry from what liberal fruitcakes call camping now.
The term racism only applies when a person of one race makes a generalization about someone of a DIFFERENT race. If you refer to the picture of this blog’s creator, you will notice that he, too, is white. This at best is a mere self deprecation, which by most comedic standards is socially acceptable.
Actually, the latest census shows that Mexican Americans are closing the gap to become a MAJORITY. By the way, isn’t classifying someone as a minority passe?
Haha I loved reading this post because it’s so true. I love camping and the actual getting ready before I leave makes everything so expensive (and its true, it does ruin your day when you think about the gas situation). Great posts they are very entertaining!
I’m white. I fucking hate camping. Fuck nature. We evolved ad made houses. Fuck tents
White people like psychics too!!!
—-
http://www.celebpsychic.com is the place to get the latest psychic predictions about your fave celebrity!!!
I totally agree with dontrelle – see the making you feel bad about not going outside thread.
Why not just go back to spearing animals with sticks and picking nits out of each other’s hair? Indoor life is what differentiates humans from screaming tree monkeys.
Sorry – if you want to play Neanderthal man, more power to you. You’ll find me INSIDE. With a comfy couch and indoor plumbing.
Indoorsy white girl
it’s a joke, don’t get your panties in a wad
You’re so right, Greg. This drive in and camp for a single night is not camping. Real multiple night camping where you actually hike a decent distance every day is fun, good exercise, and a great way to enjoy the outdoors.
So funny, my white father would congratulate my full-blooded Native American grandmother on “what a good camper she was!”. As far as I’m concerned though, if I am sleeping on the ground, something has gone horribly wrong with my life. I do love white people though and have several of my own. I love bringing Pilgrims to Thanksgiving dinner.
Well lookey here? Greg loves to go camping with nothing but MEN, and for weeks at a time! Greg even says that he had gooood times, and his perverted self wanted to have the same good times with his children.
Remember the movie Deliverance? Weren’t you the fat one who was bent over the log and squealed like a pig when his daddy, uncles, and brothers stuck their big dicks up your ungreased ass?
Hush now, I hear the banjo playing over your screams.
You country assed fruitcake beeeeeotch.
I don’t think racist is the correct term. This blog is not racist. As a sociological term, racism refers to people of the dominant and privileged group of a society acting in ways that reinforce the system’s power over a minority group.
Yes. Camping is like self-induced homelessness. Hey, I know we have a nice warm, dry house, but just for fun let’s take the whole family downtown and sleep on a bench under some wet cardboard. Makes about as much sense…
Dear emme I am one of the pilgrims coming to thankgiving and I need to bring my dog. And I am hoping to sleep in a bed.
Love, D.a.d.
You know I’ve never seen a black man in the woods. If you really believed what you post, I’m sure I would have seen you out there looking for some of that hillbilly luv.
Strange, brokeback mountain didn’t get any more of you fruitcakes out there. Its still the one place a man can go and be man without having to listen to some panty wearing fruitcakes whine.
Pretty much the only way if you ask me.
No we don’t.
The reason you are offended is because you’re a liberal. The whole site is a parody of leftwingnuts. I am surprised you only call it racist. Why not homophobic?
I find the more you know about what you are doing the less expensive it is. That works for pretty much everything.
I saw a black man in the woods once. Circa 1974.
funny you mention Brokeback Mountain, Greg….It seems that movies made about woods and cowboys always involve those conservative, manly men who love to be around men and seem to make man-love with men.
Obviously you fit the profile because you did not deny anything I previously wrote. Strange how you know so much about ‘fruitcakes’…..oh, I almost forgot who I’m talking to….Greg…the fat one who was bent over the log and squealed like a pig when his daddy, uncles, and brothers stuck their big dicks up your ungreased ass….in the woods that he and all his brokeback mountain friends do their nasty he-man love sessions….
You country assed fruitcake beeeeeotch.
Were you on your knees looking up at him with your eyes buldging like a fish as you sucked on his massive black fishing rod?
That’s funny. I had to think about it. I have spent a lot of time in the woods as an adult and camping in the cub scouts as a kid. I’ve never seen a black man or kid in the woods. Ever. Come to think of it, I was raised in the south and went to school in Calif. I’ve only seen one black guy one time at a swimming hole, and he came with me.
If you really think that camping is only for “the white cultue” then your calling your self a Ignorant Racist Idiot, also the worse case scenario for the white cultre is finding their SUV broke down in the middle of the city with the whole family in the car and nothing but “BLACK CULTRE” around them and driving away and their rims are gone, or no woods to run into too enjoy and no cracks in the sidewalk to interrupt this beautiful thing we call nature. You personally must of been taken advantage of on your first camping trip BOY…!
Camping is about getting away… away from everything and when you know what your doing, its fun. When you go with someone that has to have new items and a bunch of excessive possesions it becomes a hassle… Also its not about a new kayak, its about surviving with the knife that Grampa gives you… And you cant run away from the truth, cause the only truth is the LORDS truth, so try to run from that. Personally I don’t mind putting $60.00 of gas in the old pickup in the back-yard, just to Drive to the top of the mountain for a week and scope down at all the non REDNECKS and geuss whos on the radio….. NOT YOU!!!!!!
“Just because you never learned yourself the sixstring.”
If you could suck-it-up, like a big kid now, you just might learn that you can eat off $0.10 with just a lure on your dads old pole (or your brand new one city folk). Times are hard now, you never know if you’ll find yourself fending for your family and/or yourself,…. Start praying. (God Bless)
This blog is just humor, have a laugh, it’s okay
Ah, bless him. It always nice to know there’s a village with its idiot. Love the blog, btw. Very funny!
This post is so hilarious and so true! Thank you!! I do always spend a small fortune when I step into REI to grab some ski gear, some hiking gear, some work boots, a compass. How can you not? My thought: rake in more dough, spend it, and have fun. I have actually spent a lot of time hiking in Rocky Mountain National Park, and I love it. It’s good for me to breathe fresh air and be surrounded by nature. And I actually think that camping would be very romantic for two… I like showers, but I’m a brave soul. I’ve gotten in a few of those lakes. Where the water runs into Sand Beach Lake is the coldest water I’ve ever been in!
The last time I camped was the 1994 OCP (Ozark County Party for those of you who weren’t there). I got the worst case of poison ivy I’ve had in my life, and I wasn’t at an age I could appreciate sleeping on the ground in a sleeping bag. There was a domestic dispute in the tent next to ours, and Massey was madly in lust/love/sex/something that Summer. Before that, I had camped at Sandy Beach or Idy White Bluff every year with my grandparents, and I loved sleeping with them! Grandma always took the best foam mattress and put it in the bed of the truck–good call, Mama. It wasn’t the camping that tripped my trigger as much as the rope swing… and stuff like breaking sticks under water with my cousins and brother and saying, “That’s what a bone sounds like when it breaks.” Very fond memories. Thanks!
That’s not even his best literary work. I prefer his Forward to Ted Kaczynski’s Manifesto.
Nothing beats pro-style camping.
Whether done in a tent or motorhome.
It’s worth it being sucked on by nature escaping the hood of pounding chimp beat.
We’ve accumulated 30 years worth of gear.
There’s no REI one stop shopping all at once.
Maybe a new tent and 2″ Swedish foam for the cots.
On the ground camping is history in the wet dirt and rocks doggy style.
Arriving in the middle of the night to set up is no more than pulling out the bowling bag style Honda generator and getting it done with loungers surrounding the crackling campfire snacking on 1/2lb burgers, and Dimple Whiskey.
Facing the stars lounging you notice falling stars sweep the sky closer than your used to. You fall asleep never making it to the tent.
Wake up to hot coals still at it, hot coffee fills the air and a Thai breakfast sizzling stirs you awake.
Nearby humming birds are doing their amazing Harrier flight tricks, you load up coolers, and down the trail, the canoes wait patiently.
The next 4 hours are never endless changing adventure.
You find the landing point and are ready for chow, beer and a nap.
No crime, no loud Nascar exhaust, no screaming chimp Walmart shoppers, no sirens chasing them, no MacDonald’s, China stink. Just pure air filled to perfection.
Day 2
You wake to panic pee, jam the zipper, escape crawl through hole on all fours, as the distant foggy sunrise tries to get through old pine sap still in your eyes from star watching.
No sounds of animals being violated, well unless they volunteered.
You could of spent the weekend at Lifetime fitness, but I’ll take this any day. Besides, when’s the last time you saw canoes waiting at that place.
Ahh, the White Life.
Hey stupid “white culture” whatever the hell your stupid name is. It’s just a joke. Get it stupid???
Wow. You really don’t get it, do you?
Ohhh…love those memorries of camping… sleeping on the hard ground in a tent during a rainstorm at Doheny State Beach, rain dripping from the tent roof, in the middle of July…and on top of that, paying for the privilege.
Ouch!! brilliant…
You’re special. In the head.
I’m married to a white guy who has been hounding me about going camping with him, how wonderful it is and how much I would love it. Having never been camping myself, I could not understand what the heck was going on in his head, until I read this piece, in fact, the first paragraph sums up my exact notion of camping. Until now, I had not realized that this desire of his to “camp” was simply a part of him, part of his whiteness. Thank you for this insight. I still refuse to go camping with him but at least now I understand my dear husband a little more. I will have to find him some more white friends so he can go camping with them, so I can stay home and watch my Bollywood movies on his enormous, million-inch TV.
Wow. I never knew why I liked to camp. Guess its my pale white face after all.
cool site: slcalculator.com
🙂 very nice
Some of my best summer were on camping…..
When I got tired from my job and people around me, best thing I can do is to take a tent, put it on a bike and go to the coast….
Big fan, love this site!
Another great site to check out is http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
I grew up camping because it was the only vacations my parents (of five children) could afford. I liked it until I became an adult and flew on an airplane to Hawaii and discovered Mai Tais by the pool. Now that I am a mom/stepmom to five kids I have taken them kicking and screaming (me that is) camping and they loved it. We just sold the Palomino Stallion (our tent trailer). Click here to read more.
http://www.shwanda.com/2009/06/the-palomino-stallion/
Nude camps, anyone? What a perfect way to spend the vacation is in a clothing-optional resort. Palm Springs is full of nude colonies and motels, including one covered pedestrain bridge in downtown filled with naked old white European (and Canadian) tourists. It’s nice and warm, but I don’t care. (the line was from Sugar Ray’s “Someday”).
Best thing to do when going to vacation i sto choose – camping…
I’ve read some of these that made me scratch my head like, “what the hell? I don’t even know what they’re talking about.”
Well, ya hit the nail on the head with the camping example! With few exceptions, we white people don’t generally just pack a back and tramp around in the woods. We go through an elaborate ritual while planning our camping outings.
First, we research the park we are going to, from its history, to the number of people who visit (too many, and the place is “spoiled,” too few, and we won’t go there because it scares the shit out of us, although we won’t admit that).
Then we go to an outrageously priced outfitter for equipment that is light enough/sturdy enough/waterproof/dehydrated/environmentally safe/glows-in-the-dark/doubles as a (fill-in-the-blank)/heals snakebites/purifies water/protects from (fill-in-the-blank), all while being trendy, but not too ostentatious.
During this time, we are diligent to study travel books on the subject of camping, and personal accounts. The more “back-to-nature” the better. If someone dies while camping in one of these books, it not only won’t deter us, but will help us select our travel destination.
Then, of course, we will arrive at our chosen destination. However, we will leave early if the mosquitoes or other bugs prove to be too much, or if it’s too rainy or cold….all while turning our noses up at people with campers or RVs.
(We won’t admit it, but we’re jealous they have hot water).
…by the way, white people weren’t always like this. We used to just throw a mildewy tent, some musty sleeping bags that were lumpy and over 20 years old, some canned goods, the family dog, and our children into the back of an old station wagon, whip out the old, torn state map and say, “Okay. Now where was that campsite we went to last year?”
ok…thanks for recommending http://jusjiving.com it is hilarious
I meant http://jusjivin.com go check it out
Don’t forget to wear your Woolrich sweater, Columbia cargo pants, and Eddie Bauer boots.
Have you ever noticed that nudist camps are full of people you don’t want to see naked???
Barbra
http://intelligentwomenreadromance.com/
Well said – you hit the nail on the head. For me, the time and planning that goes into a camping trip is almost, if not as much fun as the trip and photos it will surely provide.
I spent six years in the Marines–and believe me, camping should not be that expensive, save for the beer, brats, and lead-slingers for plinking. The people this guy talks about are super, super lame.
Man, I wish I could go white people camping.
Unfortunately my dad likes to “rough it.” He’s half American Indian, so it must be that side of him that thinks camping in a place that there is no campground is fine, and “what do you mean your cold, don’t be a baby.”
I do not have as much Indian genes, and I want to go white person camping.
white men kung fu:
Have you heard of a sense of humor? You need one!
check out http://jusjivin.com it is funny as hell gives a black perspective on some things
I am a (white) teenager, so needless to say I don’t do a lot of work around the house. Which is exactly why I don’t like camping. When we are camping, I have to help out because a) there is a lot of work to be done and b) I have nothing better to do. Normally, at home, my duties include emptying the dishwasher and wiping the table after dinner. While camping, though, I have to help pitch the tent, help cook dinner, wash our plastic plates and Tupperware by hand, lay out my sleeping bag, and help pack up after it’s all over. It’s a lot of work! Any my parents wonder why I don’t enjoy camping.
go check out http://jusjivin.com
I like camping and enjoy its every process.
hahaha im white and this is hilarious, i know some of those people exactly!
Well i love this article but i have a few stipulations, the whole thing about the white people going to a sporting goods store and getting thousands of dollars worth of stuff that they only use once is not a lie but it depends on where you live.. i Live in Wyoming, the culture here is a lot different from the east and California. we buy the equipment use it for 20-30 years needless to say it pretty well used. Then the suv thing is true but outback’s can blow me! ha-ha I must be one of the bad white people because we are not the family that goes out and sing songs around the camp fire, we open up a dirty thirty and drink beer all night and eat some good steak and hamburgers and sleep really good and we run around naked ruining the family who are singing songs and having a great family togetherness and then spend all the time and money (like said in the blog) getting the equipment and just ruin there night because we are running around scaring the living daylights out of them. lets just say they left quick fast and in a hurry that morning when we left to go fishing at 6.
im white and i dont mind camping but as you can tell from below that umm.. we have fun….
Never fails to crack me up.
Check out this other great site at http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
i hate people that take too much stuff camping i have a couple places off the side of the road by a couple rivers my friends and i go out in bfe if its warm enough all we take is some food and a couple ponchos and some bungie chords, dig a whole and set up a good old fashion hooch, i will admit if theirs room we throw in a couple sleeping pads and a guitar or mayby a large rock to scare off the rattle snakes
Not to be nit picky but I don’t see the irony about driving a car to be closer with nature. Don’t cars produce the carbon dioxide which plants use to make the sugars they require to survive?
Stuff White People Like – finding ways to make themselves look like an exception to the white person in question…
Well, I am white and I HATE camping.
For exactly the reasons you mentioned ^_^#
Odd. You must do camping wrong.
….possibly this whole website, while being funny from time to time, is a bit like the idiot making the other idiots laugh by pointing out that the “smart (do I mean white?) guy” picks out the stems and seed first…. you paid for it…. why not smoke it?!
Wow very nice blog.I just got it.here i got more information about camping.it’s really very useful for all.please post more about it.Thank you.
More good Stuff white people like… 🙂
Finally, an activity void of Negros!!
Sign me up.
Oh wait, isn’t this for gays only?
DAMN, can we go back to the past where everyone was normal, and white.
CHUCKLE, CHUCKLE, CHUCKLE.
I love camping with my boyfriend. Have you seen brokeback mountain? Well imagine that movie with me, the autistic gay cowgirl.+
please, for the love of all things sacred and right, tell me you are being sarcastic
yesssssss
We must all save and buy up all the white paint we can get our hands on, and paint every non white, white.
I’m dreaming of a White Christmas..ba ba ba boo, ba boo.
Merry Christmas!
Yeah, that’s what I’m all about man, peace and love.
Scary they would call ablog this is it owned by the Klan.
Hey people nice Racist comments, this is 2009 you should be alittle more enlightened.
First big laugh of the day.
“Attention, we have a #99 on Aisle 8”
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/12/99-grammar/
Hmm. Rob’s comment comes up in almost every post on this blog, that, essentially, you couldn’t “get away with” writing something like this about [insert name of ethnic group one feels angry at]. To me, such a comment yells out that the writer is not adequately educated in analytical thought. Here’s why:
1) Improper Analogy. The analogy about someone from a different ethnic group writing “Things Native People Like” has no merit. The blogger on this site is white, and he is writing about his own cultural group, in parody (clearly, to some of us). Therefore, the proper analogy would be if a Native American wrote a parody book called Things Native People Like. And any belief that it would cause outrage is without foundation. More support of that assertion below.
2) Lack of Basic Research Skills and Motivation. The basic assumption underlying Rob’s statement is either that: a) the blogger is not white, or b) anyone writing about ethnics would be attacked as racist.
For a), the educational gap is clear because familiarity with the Internet guides one to the ever-present “About” link, which clearly states the author is white. So either Rob does not know about the “About” link, or Rob is not academically curious or trained enough to seek out foundational information before making charges or hypotheses.
For b), if Rob believes that anyone of any background, including a Native American, would be attacked for writing a book about Stuff Natives Like, then the author is not, at minimum, familiar with Amazon.com, libraries or other resources for literature, where he could have sought out verification or dispute of his claim. But that, again, leads back to the absence of curiosity or research skills.
3) The Existence of Precisely that Site. Finally, if Rob had been familiar with Google, he would have instantly learned that Native Americans already publish a Web site called StuffNativeAmericansLike.com. I urge him to see if, indeed, they are being called racists. Again, the author lacks intellectual curiosity and basic investigative skills, so he instead wrote from uninformed opinion and thought that was adequate.
On all methods of grading, including the dreaded curve, this comment earns a fail.
Thanks for your well-reasoned insight, JD, and may I add, God save the Queen.
Your anti-white hatred is sickening.
What difference does it make what year it is, aggie? Some of us don’t like all the “wonderful diversity” that is being forced down our throats. Some of us have trouble expressing it, since the media makes any semblance of white pride a fate worse than death, and all the lemmings believe it.
Jewg_ _ _ _ r
Let’s not go overboard asshole.
There was no mention of beer
He didn’t foulmouth. It was absolutely spot on. I larfed a big one, and I am white! Of course i think most white people are idiots. oops
Love it!
I’d also suggest taking a look at http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Beano on December 30, 2009 at 12:06 pm
Love it!
I’d also suggest taking a look at http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
AGAIN, BEAN HEAD.
STFU!
THAT SITE SUCKS, JUST LIKE YOU.
I love camping. It helps put perspective on the things we all take for granted when I get back to the city, like hot running water and pavement. I think I’m a lot like normal white people myself. I live in the OC, where nearly all white people have grown up in a privileged and urban setting. Spending a few nights a year in a tent, or tent cabin, or rustic simple living quarters of some kind, would do most of us good. Even if only to drop down and kiss the concrete upon return.
There’s one more thing… we taxpayers (those of us still employed, that is) pay for the protection and maintenance of our local, state and national recreation areas. We own them, actually. Shouldn’t we visit them occassionally, you know, just to check in? It’s important for the tenants to know we’re paying attention, at the very least.
So get out there and stop being afraid.
Our taxes also pay for the maintenance of our penal system in this country but I don’t feel the need to spend any time in any of our prisons.
Also if you want to appreciate all you grew up with, how about giving all that money you spent on camping equipment to a charity of your choice.
A lot of people spend the night outdoors on a very rustic environment but they get to do it everyday. They’re called Homeless. Mybe they could have that expensive tent you bought which is a lot warmer than a cardboard box.
Also a tip: Don’t kiss the concrete. Unless you’re the Pope people look weird at you if you do that and it’s not very sanitary.
This thread is a fine example of why I don’t camp around people, white or otherwise. Always loud, always telling everybody what to do. Camping in popular places is like visiting the ghetto, or maybe a refugee camp if the countryside is nice. The whole planet’s full of people these days, even the wilderness seems to be. Once out in the middle of noplace in the Cascades I stepped off the trail for a minute to pee, and there was a woman behind the bushes sitting on a rock and reading a book. People are everywhere. Sometimes I sneak into places where camping is banned, just to get some privacy.
On point.
Tony- very passive aggressive. But I have to ask, if the homeless person is given the expensive tent to sleep in, would they be homelss anymore? What catagory would that fall under?
As a black South African who went to a private school with mostly white kids and lives in a mostly white, middle-class neighbourhood,it’s funny how most of these articles apply even to South African,suburban white people.They’re generalizations for sure,but they’re an insightful,tongue-in-cheek take of middle-class,white society(even in South Africa).
Whether you like it or not forays into the wilderness connect current humans with their past. Your ancestors too used to need to know how to survive in the wilderness. Granted whoever wrote this article probably couldn’t survive for an hour without their cell phone, car, and king size bed.
What would you suggest should we be doing with our time then ? Drinking 40’s ? Sitting around watching TV/playing video games getting fat ?
If you cannot appreciate nature for its staggering beauty then you are the fool and you have not looked close enough. Stop being afraid, start living !
wow apparently none of you have ever been to the south. I have lived in Louisiana my whole life and i go camping as much as possible. its not expensive and its just fun to run and play in the woods or jump in a creek. You can take a gun with you and kill your own dinner or catch a fish. Its pretty damn fun if you know what you are doing and how to stay safe. Also in Louisiana we dont really have to drive anywhere because everything is basically forest with just little towns here and there (or swamp if you further down, which is hell to camp in because of the bugs and predators)
EW. I hate camping, I hate sushi, I hate tea, I dislike Obama… (what, I’m republican!) aaanddd yeah.
And I’m White… Because White people are people from Europe, and I’m Mexican and recently learned I’m Spanish… and I may even be French, who knows.
I love the reactions to this site almost as much as I love the posts! Camping used to be something that I had a real love-hate relationship with. Dad would either pack up the car and we would come home smelling like a campfire after being surrounded by motorhomes for a weekend, or he would throw a canoe on top of the station wagon and we’d hear wolves howling in the middle of nowhere and I wouldn’t sleep for a weekend. Maybe I just loved coming home?
I write for Stuff Rich People Love and a notable difference between rich people and the rest of the world is they don’t do things like camp, unless the can bring a stylist and professional blow dryer to do their hair. And it should be on a private island with a 12,000 sq ft home! http://stuffrichpeoplelove.com/2009/11/19/professional-blow-drying/
That is hilarious I am laughing my ass off right now. Soooo true so very true:)
check out http://jusjivin.com it is hilarious and it’s a black perspective
DUUUUH black people don’t go camping because everyone who has everyone existed on a Thanksgiving day knows dark meat is the more succulent delight of the meal. Who ever fights over white meat? Therefore black people would not fare well with bears and wolves, both of which I am sure are fans of the dark meat
How would you like to gag on my dark meat down your throat again tonight?
Just like the bears and wolves, big mouthed white girls like you love dark meat too….in your mouth!
beeeeotch.
okay this post made me LOL….literally at my desk..if I would have been drinking milk I would SMONed too
(Snorted Milk Out of My Nose)
Okay, this is really funny! Im black and I have never been camping in my life! haha. Idk how white people think camping is fun. Staying in the woods all night is just asking for trouble, thats why white people always go missing or get killed by animals. ahaha, they need to stay home.
….said the virgin to the porn star……
I’m white and I hate Camping. Who wants to pee with animals watching you?
thats because your a girl, and doesnt mean you still dont go camping. Something the writer forgot to point out is the way the female white person makes the male white person feel more masculine by complaining about everything, but still staying involved in the camping experience.
Thanks for reinforcing the Black Man Stereotype
white people stay safe at home, we blacks get killed. we’d be safer in the woods around bears, rattlesnakes and scorpions… there are less of them and they don’t got guns
its too much work and no fun. your in constant clean up mode.
I can’t even begin to tell you how badly i neeeded that comment… chu know what i meanz!
word
I literally never get sick of this web site!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
LoL i love camping but the only setback are my allergies and no toilets or electricity.
wow! you guys just don’t see it do you? Ignorance is bliss until you thrust your ignorance into my world and force me to witness it as you did in your post. Everything is NOT racist,
get a clue….. beeeeotch!
I like bike touring and camping; then I am free of the ” irony of using a gas burning car to bring them closer to nature”. Though I didn’t own a car the times I bike toured.
Unfortunately, I did encounter lots of RVs.
Neil,
Hope you are not offering an apology because you enjoy camping. The article is by WP for WP and is meant to amuse, not chastise. Do some neck rolls and relax. It is okay to like camping and to drive a car and to ride a bicycle and to cram yourself onto a stinky urban bus with 150 of your closest unknown BFs. Whatever your choose – just make the smallest imprint that you can.
Lol…I hate camping so much.
Hey buttfly I think your on the wrong site. I’m not under the thumb of the PC police. I’m not white!
@ Jah-I-am-gassy,
I’m sorry that the biggest thing you have to be proud of is being white, especially since I believe it was a rather random result. Luckily, in your next life, you’ll be given an opportunity to deepen your soul through birth into a less-elite position in society, perhaps as very dark-skinned individual in a dirty city with no running water and a rapist parent. Or perhaps as a deformed woman. Or as a stray dog.
Alternatively, you could do get on the therapy couch and get help in this life in trying to understand why you are so insecure and how you can become more happy and generous.
@AW,
I love camping, hiking, kayaking, and this is the funniest post ever. Where’s your sense of humor. Tell me the truth. You’ve never encountered these type of white “campers?” My god, they are absolutely immersed in the upscale stores. I think the writer could have made it even funnier by mentioning the how some will choose to “really rough-it” by staying in the “rustic” cabins the National Parks have created with the “down-home” “old-style” steaks and baked potatoes and blue-cheese salads. And don’t forget the rough & risky adventure of taking a private biplane to the island park. Ha ha!
This comment made me laugh twice as hard as the article, well put.
STFU BEAN HEAD………
THAT SITE SUCKS, AS DO YOU.
That their all Pimps, Drunks, Crooks, Philanderers, Lazy, Violent?
Yeah, we knew that.
STFU Enigra, you GAY FAGOT HOMO.
STFU Enigra, you slimy POS.
for more good laughs go check out http://jusjivin.com
This article is so incredibly racist and far fetched, basically saying that only posers (who happen to be white) go camping.
I’m not amused. This only perpetuates a wider gap between peoples. Come on. Everyone can enjoy nature.
This is probably the worst SWPL.
if you’re actually taking this seriously than you’re an idiot; go play in traffic.
Ha!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
i love playing in traffic, on my bike. thanks. and if you’re so moved to call me an idiot, you should open your mind to be less ignorant yourself.
what’s so funny about racism? i suppose you enjoy comedians like carlos mencia.
the problem i have with this is specific article is that is not funny. its just not funny or clever. i get the expensive sandwiches and gentrification with stuff white people like. but camping? come on… hiding racism behind comedy just isn’t funny.
grow up and be more intelligent about your two cents.
how is this specific entry racist?
i guess in some sense, it all is – the internet breeds a deluge of mental diarrhea. or freedom, as some people might call it.
i’m less than fond of this particular one because i love camping and none of the above hold true. especially the fact that many of my “non-white” friends are the first to agree to go camping. i can relate to some of the other articles, but this just isn’t funny. It seems as though the author has gotten lazy and is just poking at anything.
“Once in the camp area, white people will walk around for a while, set up a tent, have a horrible night of sleep, walk around some more. Then get in the car and go home.”
Sounds like a description of zombies, mindlessly just wandering around. What about campfires and marshmallows, guitars, nature hikes, and waterfalls? Come on, if this is supposed to be funny, far from real, and not taken seriously, then actually be FUNNY, or CLEVER at least.
People have to make excuses to get out of the enjoyment of nature? “Ultimately the best way to escape a camping trip with white people is to say that you have allergies”
so – what this article says to me:
• only white people go camping
• they spend lots of money to go do something they don’t enjoy in the first place (i.e. posers)
• you should avoid this at all costs because life is horrible without electricity and running water.
How is any of this not racist? It separates people into different categories based on stereotypes that are just off the top of this author’s head. There’s no basis for this. It’s just internet fodder…
and now that i realize it, that’s what blogs are for. Digital diarrhea.
enjoy
Wow, people are really passionate about their camping, huh?
I think it’s hilarious how people are so defensive on this particular topic. Personally, I think this was kind of funny – as funny as anything else on this site. In some cases, stereotypes serve the purpose of perpetuating an unjust status quo. In other instance, like arguably this one, stereotyping is used to critique the status quo.
Like all stereotypes, the ones about white people and camping are true about some people, wrong about others. But what makes this post funny, for me, is that the people to whom this stereotype applies so richly deserve to be mocked.
Nature tourism is like any other kind of tourism – you can justify it by saying it is good for your soul, makes you a better person, etc. But it often destroys the very things it claims to celebrate. Pristine nature is less pristine once people stamp all over it in their expensive hiking boots. Parks try to limit the damage by creating trails and campgrounds, but people in search of “real” nature are determined to be the exception and find some untouched corner. Like all tourism, it can turn into a search for “authentic” experience that is just really selfish and toxic.
At the same time, the whole national park system relies on visitors, and if people don’t grow up with a sense of the value of nature then they won’t fight to protect it. Camping as a cultural practice is rife with a lot of contradiction and hypocrisy, and I think the blog used humour to illustrate that point pretty effectively.
Replace “white” with “upper-middle class”, and you have the underlying commentary which exists below the humor.
To me, the crux of all these entries is not racism, but classism, and how self-righteous some people are with regard to the obnoxious shit they do or don’t do.
There’s a much recycled joke regarding homeless people and how they’ll NEVER enjoy camping. Obvioiusly I’m not doing it justice, but you have to take a step back and realize that camping is a very priviledged thing to do, and that this whole blog relates to the self-importance and self-righteousness of most priviledged white people.
I read a great article months ago in which the author says that hate is a zero sum game. Our generation prides itself on not hating ppl or being racist, and not hating blacks or jews or southeast asians, when in fact we are raising our kids to hate smokers, fatties and SUV drivers with same ire as our forefathers hated blacks, jews and japs.
I’m of the mind that very few things are racist by design (most dont have the stones to put their hatred out in a public forum, theyd rather just whisper it to their like minded friends)
For a bit more clarity, read the author’s interview with the onion.
and besides, these stereotypes arent hurting anyone, save their ego. it seems this article touched a nerve with you. maybe you should ask yourself why instead of decrying a very obvious piece of satire as racist and hateful.
deep breaths brother, deep breaths
take care.
dude your the man
I have the misfortune to have to transverse a road that feeds a State Park when I need to go into town for supplies.
These “urban outdoorsmen” are as predictable as mosquitoes in spring, and like mosquitoes, die off in fall, never even attempting their “nature pilgrimage” in the park when the weather might be a little less than perfect.
As the article says, they come here to escape the urban environment, the very environment they have created for themselves. Basically they have shit in their own bed and come here to escape it. Unfortunately for them, escape is not possible. They simply bring everything they attempt to escape from, with them.
They do serve a purpose of sorts for the businesses in town. A sort of pay back for the taxes that these liberals extort from us to support the welfare breeders and illegal aliens which are both the liberal “flatlander’s” creation, and the voting mechanism that keeps them in power. (And ironically, the shit in their bed that they attempt to escape)
These yuppie campers get fleeced intentionally by the town businesses. It’s become somewhat of a competition to see just how outrageously you can price and sell things to the “sophisticated urban outdoorsmen”. Outrageously price and sell the fad-driven garbage they are compelled to buy. Not things anyone actually needs. Most especially the locals.
And they all smile and wave to us locals, as they gobble up the ridiculously priced crap, as we all smile and wave to them for returning the taxes extorted from us.
Hey Adam,
Lauren’s right, you are an idiot. You obviously should stop reading the entries on this website if you can’t handle it.
And by the way, it’s fantastic that you think that the manner in which you go camping and biking in the street is non-yuppie! Get over yourself, you loser. If you have to tell everyone that you’re not a yuppy, it probably means your a huge yuppy.
So, in conclusion, get a life you f*cking tool.
Hi, I’m Buckwheat.
Otay!
Wow. Racist, huh? I guess I must be thick-skinned…or naive. My son sent me this article because he knew I’d get a kick out of it. I am white, educated, middle-class, and an avid backpacker. My two sons are Eagle Scouts, and we all (including my wife) take a week-long backpacking trip every year. I think the article is hilarious. The use of stereotypes for humor is an ancient practice. It’s been around so long because it works. It’s funny. I’m so tired of people who are unable to laugh at themselves. Instead of spending your life looking for the negative in everything, take a moment to just enjoy a good joke. Laugh! It’s good medicine.
This is satire and is effective as it targets the hypocrisy of the so called “white person”. A “white person”, also known as “urban sophist” or “hipster” is defined as a person who is recently settled in an urban area with an upwardly mobile career and an obsession with being hip which they confuse with being progressive and/or sophisticated. Your observation that this is racist is a little premature; in reality it’s this lifestyle and obsession with researching, identifying and embracing the iconography of being hip that identifies the so called “white person” who could just as well be Black or Asian although if this were the case they would be excused from ridicule as there is very little probability that they would be Republican which all white all “white people”.
hahahahahahaha. that’s funny.
you’re approach is amusing, and you seem to be really aggravated to defend this.
am i not allowed an opinion? see, this is what really makes me laugh, is that, if this blog really is just for comedic anecdotes, then why are you so quick to ridicule and be profane for someone just expressing an opinion? seems like the aggressor, i.e you, needs to take a deep breath, not me.
i should get a life, right? i love life, and I have a great one, thanks! i wake up everyday knowing how excellent it is. i breathe deep satisfaction and knowing that i am making the most of every moment, including returning this volley of internet banter.
grow up and open your mind to other possibilities than your own bubble of snarky amusement.
did you really use the word yuppie? that makes me smile. where did you hear that? but if you’re trying to be derogatory, im sorry to inform you that it didn’t work. i really enjoy being “a young, ambitious, and well-educated city-dweller who has a professional career and an affluent lifestyle.” thanks for pointing it out. I ride my bike to work and I design for a really hip advertising agency in Hollywood.
“so in conclusion, get a life you fucking tool”
hahahahahahahahaha. thats your conclusion? wow. very well thought out and put together. sounds like you’re bitter, but maybe you’ll get over that one day. good luck.
Deep breaths indeed, but I’m not agitated. I’m perfectly ok because I understand what this is.
Though, am I not allowed an opinion?
I agree replacing “white” with upper-middle class” would be more appropriate.
Additionally, I think this article would make more sense to be skiing/snowboarding than camping (lift ticket, hotel, rental equipment, the burden of waiting in lines to be there, etc.). camping costs nothing besides food you would bring out, lest you don’t catch some fish yourself.
I definitely could understand the homeless dilemma and camping, but my point was that being in nature and seeking the outdoors isn’t something that should be regarded as “only a certain class” of people can enjoy. the Angeles National Forest is just north of some of the shittiest parts of the San Fernando Valley, and I’ve seen some pretty poor looking folks enjoying an afternoon creekside.
this article touched a nerve with me and my relationship with all peoples enjoying nature… i couldn’t care less what white people have to say about themselves – after all, a little self induced deprecation is only deserved for white folk.
Huzah!!!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
White people and camping, absolutely! LOL
Mighty White of you to throw in some 1) White Guilt (last sentence) and 2) Climate Change (gasoline burning). When does Climate Change make the list or is that too sacred?
My, my. Tis is funny!!!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
white people love being offended.
I’m white and I hate camping and prefer Jay Leno. Does this make me not white?
BAHAHAHAHHA i love this post, everything so complicated hahahaha and yes levi betz this classifies you as ‘pearl.’ Just as you can classify your car color as off-white or pearl. It sounds bad to say ‘off’ white however because it implies something is wrong with you, your preference to jay leno makes you ‘pearl.’
i hope a white person comments on my grammar so i can properly direct them to the corresponding post.
camping my favourite is mount
OMG! Sooo funny (an understatement)!
You wouldn’t happen to know Chris Rock, would ya…??
No, you’re just “the wrong kind of white people” ; )
Your responses here are ridiculous.
First of all, I love the shift from race to class you and Jason have been doing here. Classism is intertwined with racism – white people have a disproportionately high net worth compared to other racial groups. A race-based critique (however satirical) doesn’t need to be a class-based critique “instead” when it’s already a class-based critique AS WELL.
Secondly, well – maybe you do camping very, very differently. But I come from a white, middle-class family which is BIG on camping and hiking, and this entire article is sharply on-point – and hilarious for it.
There is little recognition, among the many, many white hikers/campers I’ve met, of the sheer ludicrousness of the fact that they may spend hundreds of dollars on equipment in order to go (bear bells loudly a-jinglin’!) into the woods to be “closer to nature.”
Maybe where you live “any class” of people can go camping. But where I am, that’s not true. Just to get into a national park, it can cost upwards of $80 a year for one person.
That’s a lot of white people. In expensive bloody tents, walking around.
Get a sense of humour.
Quite the pants pisser!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
You couldn’t pay me enough to want to go sleep outside on the ground. Give me a good Doubletree and some room service and that’s a vacation!
This one should’ve been in the book!
http://www.stuffpeoplehate.com
I was always amazed when I see all those white people “camping” but actually just sitting around the camp all day. Ha Ha.
check out http://stuffnewmanstudentslike.blogspot.com/2010/02/being-rich.html for some comic relief
I am very adventurous and LOVE doing outgoing things.And I think Camp out with a couple of friends for two or three days out in the woods and just ride through the woods is really amazing.
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I can imagine this is the 128th time this has appeared on this blog too
Hey look at this blog.. really funny http://stuffnewmanstudentslike.blogspot.com/
check out my blog for some humour!
http://www.stuffpeoplehate.com
well…hey Thanx Matt, cool seekers are currently spying on high schools across the country for future trends, such as white students whom actually aren’t into Hannah Montana and worry about not landing a part-time job in McD’s after graduation.
Whata hoot-and-a-holler.
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Hi my name is Thomas Briollet. I LOVE doing anal….but I know me and I dont want to fuck around.I want an intelligent, horny, educated, polite, submissive, hot steamy, sexy, bimbo guy model with a tan and the ignorant innocence to become my sex slave. I REFUSE to settle for anything less than PERFECTION as I myself am So Perfect!
Are there any vital indications as to whether a guy likes Anal?
Thomas briollet
4dawin!
And this is the reason I like stuffwhitepeolplelike.com. Insightful post.
You are absolutely right. Us black folks can’t understand why you guys love camping so much. Specially seeing how every damn horror movie that ever was begins with 6 white kids in the woods. Ha ha ha.
And, then there’s Burning Man, which is unbelievably popular with whitey.
My name is Thomas Briollet. I must admit I am homosexual. The only woman I fantasize about sexually is my mother. She is so fucking sexy. I dream of bending her over and pounding her pussy in front of our gay French relatives. Then I will come on her face and she will lick it off and say “Oh Thomas,you are just like your father who beat the shit out of you and me and was a pathetic alcoholic, and now you just work for some stupid French wine distribution company because you are too stupid to see beyond cliches about French people!” The best thing the French have is the Eiffel Tower, but it is completely useless, like me Thomas. It is just an ugly heap of metal that serves no purpose. Big deal.
I think the French people are so great, but the French have done fucking nothing for the world. If French is so great, why does the whole world speak English? I hate English speakers, but it was the Americans who saved the French from the Germans during World War 2. I am a typical worthless French guy. I need to wax down my extremely thick eyebrows because they take up half my face. I live in China because I think I can be hedonistic and an international playboy, but only the trash of the world lives in Beijing because it is a shitty communist hole. The Chinese would kill someone to move out of Beijing. I moved here to make money to send to my pathetic French family who can’t find jobs to support themselves, because they live in a ghetto called Reims. I thought in China I would be an important white man, but really the Chinese wish I would leave their country, and stop sleeping with many prostitutes and sluts in their country both Asian and white. Take my laowai trash out, and also my horrible French wine.
I grew up in a housing project because my father was too busy beating me up and drinking because he was an unemployed alcoholic and he never loved me. But I still am playboy like he is. He fucked lots of women and had lots of ugly offspring like me. My father used to beat me up because I deserved it for being a shtihead bastard, and asshole. So I fantasized about fucking my mother like he did. Now I dominate women because I am scared of being controlled and powerless. I like to beat them up and be an S&m Master because I’m scared of being weak and beaten up like when my papa used to hit me. I like only sexy innocent white girls who are models and who are stupid enough to be submissive to me. They make me feel important and strong, but I am boring and an ugly French cliche.
I am secretly gay, but I never told my papa cause he would hit me hard and make my ass bleed. I like partying partying and drinking and dancing because I am so original! I am such a party animal! Too bad I am getting fatter and uglier as I grow older. Too bad I have a small small penis and I will never satisfy a woman; and they are faking their orgasms by going ah ah ah. But many sexy girls make me feel important. I am scared of being alone so I must be surrounded by lots of friends and distractions because in my retard brain I know that my papa hated me and he abandoned me. Sincerely, Thomas Briollet.
There is nothing more inherently white spending money to pretend to be homeless.
there is nothing more inherently white than pretending to be homeless for a weekend
goochy.wordpress.com
You are a sick individual and need to stop posting this stuff before I fly over to China and re arrange your face!!! People like you need to be put into mental institutes and reprogrammed, your mind is a vile sewer full of the filth of the world. Repent! God have mercy on your sick soul.
I’m white. This is so true, and hilarious! I love it! You can’t forget that we have to drag a veritable kitchen along with us: ie BBQs, coleman stoves, our own set of “camping dishes” etc. It entails a lengthy and expensive grocery run before going out into the wild yonder, and of course you always forget something. It will either rain or snow, and you end up soaking wet, with no way of warming up.
And yet we still go, over and over again. 😉
White people love Subarus!
I love camping in my motor home.
Sent From My iPhone
Lol.
haha that’s hilarious. camping in north carolina chyeaaaah.
hate camping. what ethnicity does this make me?
lol indeeed
I feel so sorry for you. I know what its like to have that kind of family. I wish you luck at finding whatever it is that you are looking for. I hope you find the man or woman that truly loves you for who you are, and find peace inside your soul.
It should be noted that an *advanced* white person will not go camping, as this is an activity that the wrong kind of white people occasionally engage in. No, advanced white people go “backpacking” which is even more dangerous, time consuming, and expensive. It also requires yet more specialized equipment, and gives the backpacker the sense of being even farther from civilization, as the distance traveled from their parked car is considered a measure of their love for nature. Often times, backpacking will require more than a mere weekend to complete, and it is likely to involve the white person’s perfectly trained, trusted off-leash, canine companion. Unlike camping, backpacking is often limited to smaller group sizes, and in its ultimate and most dangerous form is a solo activity. If you mention to a white person that you are planning on going camping this weekend, and they give you a look of judgmental pity, you can be sure you are in the presence of an “advanced” white person.
Birdwatcher, the most advanced white people canoe. They have appropriated this means of transportation from the natives and by partaking in the activity they can then claim all sorts of degrees of superiority over nearly anybody, including mere campers and especially people who sleep in hotels.
The guys who host this blog were featured on a CBC Radio 3 podcast of Extended Play talking about the colour of indie rock. Check it out and you’ll get a true appreciation for how humourosly sarcastic they are. It’s oddly ironic, though, that the one of them who is not white scored higher on a “whitey test” than the one who is.
see item #101 in the SWPL list
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/28/101-being-offended/
Due to the layers of complication that must be involved in relieving oneself while engaged in canoeing versus the aforementioned activities, I think you may be correct. In fact, difficulty and time involved in relieving oneself may be the most accurate gage of the level of eliteness assigned a given activity. Think astronaut. I’ve pondered how the advanced white people who engage in month-long cliff-face climbing expeditions, their miniscule “tents” dangling precariously from a nail tapped into a rock wall hundreds and even thousands of feet in the sky, were able to take care of business. There can be no tidy solution. Oh, to be elite….
Antarctica…. the ultimate white person camping destination.
So funny- thank you for this one!!!! I have held out out sleeping outside because in Chicago if you’re camping, it’s ’cause you’re homeless….
RV’ers are definitely the wrong kind of white people. Oh, the irony. Why would you leave your suburban home, travel long distances, while paying out large expenses due to poor gas mileage and “campsite” utility fees, only to sit in your less comfortable and much smaller version of a home? The only explanation I can think of is the previously mentioned bathroom difficulty idea. RV restrooms aren’t exactly spacious, and I suppose there would be a level of difficulty involved in relieving yourself, which would create the illusion of being an advanced white person. If that is the case, why don’t people go “camping” in airplanes. All the criteria apply. It’s expensive, you travel far from home, and you have to be a gymnast in order to use the restroom. At least you are served snacks and small beverages on an airplane. White people love small beverages. Oh, and there are no mosquitos.
Send me more
What a Killjoy!
Camping is the a-typical white person activity. This piece is right-on the mark. Well done.
Make sure to also check out http://SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Tell the African-American backpackers I’ve camped with that “camping is for white people.” I’m sure they’d get a laugh out of that – or perhaps just be angry?
As a white person — almost glowing white, in fact, being that I spend 90% of my time sitting in the dark like a mushroom in front of the computer — who loves camping, I find this hilarious. As a white person who’s almost died twice while camping — once from dehydration after climbing, and once getting my car stuck in deep sand in the desert — who STILL loves camping, I also find it horribly, painfully true. What can I say? White people is crazy.
These days, at least, I’m a little older, a little wiser. Plenty of water, keep the car on the beaten path… Mostly now I just find a nice quiet spot to sit, munch on some cruddy camping food (that tastes SO good after a few days of “roughing it”), and write on my laptop or work on some new funny t shirt designs for my website. Why do I need to be in the middle of nowhere to do this? I have no idea. But I still love it.
Well, if you ever want to go price kayaks, give me a holler. I won’t buy one either, but we can certainly talk about what a great deal one would be. :>)
Anyway, awesome post. I needed that laugh today. Keep it up!
This is waaaaaaaaaaay too true. My mother (one of the whitest 50 year olds) has to take the family camping and say things like “isn’t this just great and feel the fresh air”.
Another thing which isn’t pointed out in this article is that their are two types of camping, there is the type featured in this article, and the camping done by the wrong type of white person, the camping done by the wrong type of white person is at a caravan park and is frowned upon by the national park white campers.
I bought the book and think its absolutely hilarious, but is the blog supposed to have different subjects than the book, or is there another copy with all this new stuff?
And don’t forget complaining; we white people love to complain.
to have sex in peace, and not have to poop in the woods of course!
camping routinely gets dumped on by stinky non-shaving lesbians. when i go camping i get really drunk and yell racial slurs because i can, or could, but just when you want to simply act like johnny rebel here comes a c*** sucker and her girlfriend with broke d*** telling you what to do out in the middle of nowhere.
Although I am a camper and not a white person, I love this bog. I think it is very funny.
There are many different types of campers. What you described is car camping, and if you are going to do that, you may as well have an RV. The key is to do backwoods camping where you spend time hiking into the forest away from most people and really get away from it all.
Just remember, when Armageddon happens, you will want to know a few campers to help you survive in the woods.
just to let you know, if Armageddon happens, the first place they’ll blow up are the campers in the wooods…
We camp a lot to be at the right place. To get to private lakes to practice our liquid mountaineering you need a camper, really.
This post is dumb. I’ve only been camping twice, and both times I found myself to be the whitest (50%) person there.
awww….there’s nothing like white people camping in the deep woods, siting in their portable recliners, listening to the crackling of a nearby stream, enjoying the tastes of Bear Whiz Beer.
Yes, Bear Whiz Beer. Made from the downstream waters of Bear country. Flavored and colored by the whizzing of large bears (that is what gives Bear Whiz Beer its deep yellow color….just like Budweiser!!), and filtered with the finest bear whizzed on bark and barley that man can find.
Head for the mountains white people! And don’t forget to bring along empty aluminum cans, to capture your very own Bear Whiz Beer straight from nature’s upper mountain streams!
PS: I hear that bathing near where bears, and especially brown bears, will make your skin white as pearls. I don’t know if this is due to the bear whiz in the water or just the fear factor of the bears chasing you, but either way—-you will be plenty white afterwards—if you live to tell the story.
Har har.
Ok, Im white and just came back from a camping trip, and for the record, we went to a State Park. Other than that, this post was pretty much my weekend.
Chances are you’re weren’t actually camping- at least not the kind this blog was referencing. You were probably at some “recreation area” consisting of a small wooded park, tiny fake pond, and a giant muddy RV trail through the middle. I’ve done that- it’s miserable. This guy’s talking about REAL camping 🙂
man i went camping and the only thing I did was shit in the woods and hit a squirl in the head with a rock the end. go to http://www.myurbantree.com
You know what white people like… laughing!!
http://www.DanielDickey.com
A Comedy Blog — Free Laughs
ChatRoulletteFailBlog.com
The Best Chat Roulette Fails
Although I am a white person I think this blog is f**n hilarious! I’ve muddled through 17 years of marriage to a guy who’s vacations as a kid consisted of camping and who wanted to pass on that treasure to my kids and I!
This only led to me being bored as hell, eaten alive by mosquitoes( big enough to saddle and ride), drinking myself into oblivion for fun by a smokey ass camp fire and then to later be surrounded by the sound of my 2 boys and husband snoring under one tent while I piss in a Wendy’ biggie size cup because there’s no way in hell I’m squatting in the dark under a tree that I have to hike a mile to get to!!
Now my idea of camping is a hotel room with no room service and no fridge or bar in the room!!
this is funny!
“looking at history, the instances of my people encountering white people in the woods have not worked out very well for us.”
*laughs* Oh my gosh, that is the funniest line!
B. tried for years to get me to go camping with him saying if the $$$ tent was purchased and we used it X amount of times then it’d be cheaper in the long run.
He’s also the type of camper that loves to talk about how amazing it would be to be with “one” with nature and has been camping once. In an RV. About 20 years ago.
I must say, I sure chuckled when I read “Stuff White People Like”. You been spying on us? Sometimes that is exactly how it goes! I don’t think I can recall a good nights rest in the woods ever. But I still take on the punishment, every year!
“You should not say something like “looking at history, the instances of my people encountering white people in the woods have not worked out very well for us.”
LOL LOL LOL. I think I actually said dat once. lol
LOL. 🙂
camping is a good way to reduce stress, as long as u enjoy it and not just imitating the “white people trends”.
Its gold…pure gold…
OMG! I worked with this woman who had a son that was graduating basic training from the Air Force. Her and her husband drove from Florida to Texas to see him. They were going to go camping in the woods with tents and sleeping bags so they wouldn’t have to pay for a hotel room!
They ended up staying at a motel 6. I guess they decided to splurge.
On top of all that they left their two other kids at home with somebody so they wouldn’t have to pay for them to go. They did this because eating out and everything else while out of town was too expensive for them so they didn’t want to have to pay for their other kids to eat out.
Now how pathetic is that!
As a mom who is home with kids all day I have to disagree about your thoughts on camping. Camping is great for getting my frequently-traveling husband to forget about his iPhone and it prevents me from most of the chores and all of the running that around I do. And RV camping is the only way to “camp”.
If Master Lander is so entusiastic for the US to become a non-white country who doesnt he go and live in El Salvador or Haiti for while?
http://boerboel1.wordpress.com/2010/05/01/self-flagellating-cnn-moonbat-celebrates-white-suicide/#comment-833
ITS A JOKE LADY!…Where is that self deprecating white humor??? HAHAHA
Oh, but what they described here is not camping. To actually camp, you don’t pack a car, you pack a rucksack. A compass and flint are helpful. You take off into a wooded area make a fire and enjoy. To keep warm, a “fire blanket” made by making 2 long rows of fire spread far enough apart for you to lay between. Keeps you warm all night.
That is how you camp.
More on camping: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qle-vjHoQa4&feature=related
Yeah. Like that little Alamo thing. Somehow, that lead to our losing the entire state of Texas. Bummer.
For white people who love camping and also love to stay clean while doing so, I recommend http://www.CampingShowerWorld.com for everything related to portable camping showers.
Spoiled harpy.
And posted on my B-day no less…
Late to the party here, but thanks Clander, I love you man!
What the hell is your deal???? What does this have to do with anything?
This is my personal favorite thing that white people like. I also have found another website about something relative to this:
http://stuffnewmanstudentslike.blogspot.com/
Its pretty darn funny.
LOL, this entry is SO funny, and so true it’s sad :P. Although I’m a white guy and I actually HAVE had fun experiences with my family camping, although there sure as heck were plenty of crappy ones too.
this is sooo true…i hate camping so much but all white people think its the best thing in the world. sleeping on the ground in the wilderness cold or hot and waking up sweaty or cold and eating hot dogs…and crap like that is not my idea of a good time….haha
Hilarious, and made even better by the Campmor Google ad.
I’ve been saying this for years!
I’m only half white, but I didn’t get the camping gene. Thank god.
I’m white, but I’m also a geek, so, most people assume I hate camping. I don’t, however… if I have my laptop with me and we camp where there’s WiFi.
Yeah – you’re definitely the right kind of white person.
God..The people who write this blog are retards.
I’m white and most our white friends ‘love’ camping so we’ve been doing it to fit in. Are they all lying??
Having a bad nights sleep and walking around the outdoors is pretty much sums up the experience. A thin sheet of fabric is not shelter & does nothing to keep out noise or cold.
The amazing thing is that to go camping & ‘get away from it all’ to ‘de-stress’ requires an enormous amount of effort in terms of packing and planning, and then constant activity is needed to maintain a minimum standard of livability, that you have at home with out even thinking about it. The gear we load up in the 4WD to do this has cost us hundreds.
Camping is insane. It should be banned for being stupid.
Things Republicans Hate:
http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/
I know, right? They totally overlook the idea of hammock camping. Retards, indeed.
Sorry dude, but if you’ve got WiFi, you ain’t camping…
Funny that people are that dim. I love camping, it is easy. Just get in the jeep and go. I have a Roof Top Tent, all you do it fold it open it has a bed inside, sheets, pillows, comforter. All I have to pack is food, water, and fuel is I am going for an extended trip. Everything else is already there. By the way, I sleep GREAT at night.
Would love to know the skin color of the poser writing this thing.
Cheers
I am unsure what the problem is with about half the idiots that posted here or the retard that wrote the blog. I grew up a woodsman and spend a good portion of my life where there is no WiFi, Telephone, electric or even a dang roof. Takes me 45 minutes to have myself and my family packed for a weekend, an hr and a half for a week. We sleep fine and eat very well.
The blogger is with out a doubt an idiot and racist. I get sick of hearing people of other nationalities call the white man racist when so many people of other cultures and colors are just as bad or worse. Stop playing the race card and just live.
This post is a joke. You have absolutely no clue about camping, unless your whole rant is meant purely for entertainment. You also make cracks about our national parks which to me is sad, our national parks system is one of the many great things about our country. Thats fine you don’t enjoy it.. but don’t deter others from enjoying them with your ridiculous comments about only white people camping, spending crazy amounts of money on equipment and other nonsense you obviously have no experience with.
Um, James…. The site is called “what white people like .com”
It’s a parody! Laugh a little and live a little, see the irony in life even if it means laughing at yourself every once in a while!
Signed,
A White Guy who goes camping alot!
I agree with these observations and agree with it all. 🙂
Confession: I’m white and have $10,000 worth of gear in the garage. But, at least I use it.
Oh my!
LOL….. Come here often?
Things Republicans Hate: No. 30 The Red Dot of Terror
http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/?p=292
I am a spiritual white person. I don’t like religions that limit my social freedom, but I love spirituality and being spiritual!!
One of my favorite ways to get in touch with my inner spirituality is to go camping. I love camping in the woods by the ocean, with the sun and the stars and the moon and the birds and the dolphins. We are all one and I dream that someday we will all come together on the beach by the camp ground and have gay-psychadelic-mammal-sex, yaay!!!!!
Wow this one is hilarious!! Well written and witty. The whole site is for entertainment, some people who complain need to calm down and just enjoy.
Camping is a very wholesome, fun experience that is a wonderful way for families to spend time together away from cellphones, Ipods, tv,an all the things that tend to isolate people who are in the same family, living all in the same house. The above article is a parody, I don’t think anyone is poking fun at all. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to camp. A tent from Walmart…an ice chest….air mattress for the old folks. Bring blankets from home, don’t even need sleeping bags, Old pots from a thrift store or your own old pots. Borrow grandma’s cast iron cooking pot. Most campgrounds have grills and fire rings to cook on. Start out that way and add to it as you go along. My dad let us sleep out under the stars while he slept in the back of our station wagon.
I love camping. I’m white. But I don’t love camping because I’m white. I love it because if you go to a public camp ground it’s a fantastic way to meet people of ALL COLORS. And to broaden your horizons. We’re not stupid.
I own an RV and live in the South. I also drive a Saab and have an REI membership.
Am I a “right kind of white person” or a “wrong kind of white person”?
Discuss
Can’t stop laughing. Guilty on all counts, until I became a employee of the forest service and now get to reap the benefits of the necessary “use of valuable government resources” when I intervene in nature experiences. Love it.
“Since white people and their children are allergic to almost everything, they will understand and ask no further questions”
hahahaha,so true.
While I find this article a complete scream and totally accurate when describing white yuppies! I’m on the other side of the white people camping scenario! For me to find my thrill in camping, it always has to be “primitive camping” ie … pit toilets, no showers, no RV hookups, no pools, camp stores or miniature golf!
I’m one of those crazy white girls that loves the outdoors and wilderness camping! My destination is almost always discovered through the AAA camping guides. I search out the State I’m interested in visiting. I locate the largest State or National forest with the most amount of acreage and the least amount of camping sites. A 20,000 to 30,000 or more acre Park with 10 to 20 camp sites is what I consider prime camping at it’s best!
Once I arrive, I park in the lot, make sure my envelope with my itinerary is tucked up on the sun visor with a return date boldly marked on the front of it. I get out strap on a 40 – 65 lb backpack, find a trail and hike deep into the forest 10 to 20 miles or more…. far away from the parking lot, camp sites and every living 2 legged being and all their screaming obnoxious offspring!
Once I find an area that suits my needs, I unpack my load. clear an area for my tent, pitch it and then proceed to enjoy nature in all it’s wonderful splendor…just as God intended it to be!
Love visiting your types, especially when you have yard sales!!!
you forgot…and smoke pot!!
this only seems to work for white-white people, not Europeans. I’m never able to identify with white people in Canada on anything, theyre so weird.
THINGS REPUBLICANS HATE: No. 39 Grey Poupon
http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/?p=373
Love this blog??? Come meet Christian on June 27th in Princeton, NJ at 3PM. For more information and to purchase tickets visit http://www.onesimplewish.org/events
All proceeds will benefit One Simple Wish, a NJ non profit. (hey – #12!)
As a contrasting white guy from a northern state who drives a Honda and owns stock in a non-co-op sporting goods store, I submit that you’re doing your part to reinforce the stereotype on every possible front. Semi-narcissistic bent to the post, classic white person behavior. Despite being plainly affluent, somehow the “punctuation inside the quotation marks” rule eluded you. Small potatoes.
Verdict: with respect to the premise maintained by the site – right kind of white person.
Please enjoy having the cream of everything available in the world.
This was supposed to be a reply, stupid site.
I 100% agree with this one. Camping is about the highest form of “adventure” white people (in general) partake in.
http://SomethingYouShouldRead.com
r u black ?
Stuff white people like: Being grammar nazis. It’s “worst-case scenario,” not “worse case.”
Things Republicans Hate: The List
http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/?page_id=405
Ha! i know this post is old but I just saw it now.
My husband (who is white and grew up in Colorado) and I (Asian immigrant and grew up in NJ) “discuss” the ironies of camping every summer. We have different ideas about vacation plans. Did you overhear us last year? 😉
Thanks for the laugh!
the writer of this is not all there camping cost about 5 dollars a day for me so get it straight before you open your trap.
This is hilarious….
unfortunately some people can’t begin to appreciate it because they lack multicultural perspective and humorous admiration of others different from them self.
~White Girl with Asian Insights
I really like this,
I’m a 25 year old white male.
I am a believer in God.
Knowledge like this helps me to become a more loving person.
I thank you, much love!
RED EARTH WHITE LIES .com
Prophesy and truth.com
shed your ignorance!
Find the truth!
i’m as white as snow. but i love camping and this shit is so funny and true.. good stuff
i hate this your so stupid
Hilarious perspective on camping! It’s so good that we can all laugh at our camping selves, or others that camp.
The new cool http://www.myurbantree.com
Camping sur certains outils de sauvetage devraient prendre afin de ne pas courir sur les accidents….
LOL I love this girl!
Don’t camp, never will.
dude chill its a joke. god i hate people like you, emoo
I spent 6 years in the USMC, which is something white people don’t do, either. During that time, I went camping in many places, but we called it being in the field [training] or going to Iraq. Prior to that, I’d never gone camping, really.
I’ve had enough camping for 25 lifetimes in that 6 year period. Count me out for camping, please. I hate it. I don’t want to sleep in a sleeping bag on a foam pad, thank you. I want to sleep in some rich [and they’re all trust funders] camper’s swell house while he’s out getting close to nature. Preferably with his hot wife who doesn’t like camping either!
I’m white and I LOVE CAMPING! Being out in nature, breathing the clean air, swimming in clean water, seeing wildlife, fishing and canoeing are some of my favorite things. So what if you have to use a sleeping bag and sleep on a pad? Suck it up princess! I have had many good nights sleep in a tent. It just sucks when it rains, but camping is all about overcoming challenges and making the most out of whatever nature throws at us. I think urban people are spoiled by all their creature comforts. I am also Canadian and we have lots of awesome natural beauty to be seen in our country. Camping rules!
Once in the camp area, white people will walk around for a while, set up a tent, have a horrible night of sleep, walk around some more. Then get in the car and go home. This, of course, is a best case scenario. Worst case scenarios include: getting lost, poisoned, killed by an animal, and encountering an RV. Of these outcomes, the latter is seen by white people as the worst since it involves an encounter with the wrong kind of white people.
I do love camping very much!And according to theory doing camping is inexpensive.But as with everything in white culture, the more simple it appears the more expensive it actually is.I guess it become expensive due to the things we bring during camping and the activities we want to do during camps.The longer time you spent in camping the greater expense you might experience.
Obviously, I camp. But REAL camping cannot be done in a campground. No one will be jealous of your facebook pictures of a campground.
You have to be in the deepest wilderness, far from the nearest civilization. That way you can get drunk and belligerent with out angering neighbors, start massive fires that threaten the entire forest, and shoot guns without attracting police.
Then, after it all, you can be smug about getting back to REAL nature instead of some campground overrun by kids and drunken belligerents.
I’m interested to know why the author believes non-whites can’t handle life in the wilderness…
What’s funniest about this is it gets it wrong. Those who camp (at public campgrounds, rather than in the wilderness) are more “diverse”. Those who don’t just park and stay at a campground but who go for non-tourist hikes, or climb rocks, or do snow/glacier climbs are a lot less “diverse”. Out of the people I’ve seen at REI, some of them are on the yuppie side, but out of all of them most look like they actually put what they buy to good use.
—
http://outdoorlifestyle.com/
typical white person..but if your saying to stop being a princess why not just live in the wilderness forever? you will overcome maaany challenges and like that you can sleep on the dirt all you want. be sure to take Bill or Bob along with you though. you should probably video tape all that goes on cause maybe like that we can have another “Blair Witch Project” movie..or maybe you will just be eaten by a bear..either one will make a great movie!
Bring a book on identification and clasification of forest animals and plants with you. One book ‘Western Forests’ by the National Audubon Society is dedicated to forests and woodlands of the western U.S. Learn something new. Before camping, make sure you know what the hell is a poison ivy, poison oak, California oak, California golden poppy and illegal heroin poppies or marijuana patches you might bump into (now legal in the city of Oakland).
White people are really that adventurous even if they will be stock at the middle of wilderness they will consider that as a camping.Yet, there are some white people who is unaware what are the dangers they might encounter in the wilderness.
Interestingly, most of the people I encounter on camping trips are either first generation Mexican immigrants or Korean/Chinese tourists discovering the wealth of nothingness that northeast PA has to offer (in the summer anyway.)
you are a fucking idiot…
I don’t care if white people are too inexpensive during camping,one thing for sure is that they just love doing camping.The bottom line with this story is lets just keep the nature as it is during camping no burning and killing of wild animals.
Hilarious! Not all of us like camping, but you definitely have pegged the ones that do. Enjoyed this morning chuckle. Thanks!
I dated a guy for a while that was even whiter than me: a card-carrying NRA/Blue Ribbon Coalition/4×4 kind of guy. Needless to say, he really got off on “camping.” Trouble was, he could turn the simple act of sleeping in the woods into the biggest pain in the ass I have ever experienced: All kinds of crazy, complicated, specialized gear requiring unpacking, assembly, erection, disassembly and storage at every stop . And of course, we always had to go with his posse – all of whom were “packin’.” One time in the middle of the night one of the extended posse arrived in the middle of the frickin’ Sierras in an 18 wheeler – fully decked out with mahogany bar, flat screen satellite TV (it was probably “world cup” that year), full kitchen w/ gas range & convection oven, poker table, spa-like bathroom. It took him over 2 hours to get it level. All this, so he could “commune with nature.”
“…..situations might eventually lead to a book deal or documentary film about the experience.” was a killer, thanks. I really like this article!
Why is that when it comes to camping, the white people are always the center of the story.?is there a great issue with this.Its clear that doing camping is the activity that most white people love to do!and I just love doing camping too.What is important here is that,if we do camping we know how to handle well with out environment.
also, because white people enjoy just buying camping equipment. ever seen a black person wearing the north face?
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****http://justsomepetpeeves.wordpress.com
seriously, check it out!
Hilarious comment. Mainly because your scenario pretty much summed up everything this article was poking fun at… Don’t worry, almost everyone here is an unapologetic insider, anyway.
For white people who like camping with every amenity possible, check out the Eccotemp L5 tankless water heater.
It does seem overkill to bring a gas water heater on camping trips but hygiene is still one of the most coveted things when going camping.
Here’s a good demonstration of the Eccotemp L5 in action on YouTube:
This blog also has a funny post on camping: littlemisslivid.wordpress.com
This is hilarious, especially because I’m about to go the store to get food and supplies for this weekend’s camping trip!!!!
🙂
What insipid observations – and so forced.
If you don’t like it, then leave.
You’re about as entertaining as a sandal.
I “camped” on a picnic table one night with a girl, in the Canadian Rockies near Banff – top that, clander…
Most of my camping trips cost less than $100, food and gas included and are a closer drive than any “city” attractions. We’re quite happy to have all the people who can’t understand the appeal of sleeping under the stars and not being surrounded by every electronic device known to mankind staying away, though. You just ruin our peace and enjoyment with either a lot of whining about every little thing or attempts to make your campsite “just like home”, complete with booming sound-system, throwing trash all over the forest and freak-outs over anyone who looks at you “funny”. That applies to anyone who doesn’t like camping, regardless of ethnicity.
I hate camping. Unless I have an airbed and a shit ton of blankets to keep warm, you won’t find me camping anywhere except my backyard.
But yeah, most white people I know love camping. I’m the exception.
1001st comment 🙂
I think camping is great it really gives you time to unwind and think about everything.
Honey it sounds like you need to spend some time in the GHETO and get away from all these white folk. Try relaxing there for a bit.
To all those leaving comments defending camping or badmouthing this satiric description of “white-people camping”, STFU and enjoy the free, online, comedic entertainment. Or read something else that’s meant to be taken seriously.
As an avid camper (ok, I used to be more avid), I ROTFLMAO’d at this.
haha! this is so true! camping in a tent is so much more work than in a trailer!
jk. i love camping it is da bomb! it really does releif stress.
That must be where Somewhitegirl came from.
Yes, there is a big industry in selling camping gear that many buy into. We buy most of our camping stuff at yard sales and garage sells, sleep in tents and sleeping bags. Some of our friends, however, insist on bringing their RV’s to our annual trip and I don’t call this camping at all.
I agree. The only thing I have bought new was my tent and cast iron pans. RVing is not true camping, but to each his own.
Why don’t you roll off a cliff, retard.
Before going in a camping have some website review first about a certain camping site to know where you can find the best site for camping.
Some people have no sense of humor or fun.
I’m white and got a good chuckle out of this. (Although camping never costs me that much 😉 )
I don’t know the author, and if he/she is being mean-spirited or whatever else, but some of that stuff rings true. Enough to get a good laugh.
How hilarious! What a great sense of humor this person has!
I think this is my very favorite “stuff white people like”….soooooo freakin’ hilarious.
I’m sad for you guys that can’t laugh at yourselves, this shit is true and it’s FUNNY!!
I have this white friend who invites me and my family camping every year. So far I have come up with 10 excuses to cover my butt the last 10 years. Why can’t he just stay in a cabin like a normal person?
lmao…I’M WHITE!!! i shop at REI, i went to yellowstone and had to rent a Subaru Outback, i pay a crap load of money for my gear (good backpacks and tents ain’t cheap), i’ve bought a couple things several times and have only used once, my girlfriend is allergic to EVERYTHING but still goes backpacking with me, we walk around for hours upon hours just looking, and we have been temporarily misplaced (aka: lost).
p.s. i will say that once you invest on what gear you need then backpacking is mostly free minus food.
and all the campers laughed at you and related other stories of what a whiney white guy you are as soon as you left the camp site. Next time take a tablespoon of cement and harden the f**k up
I really can’t believe most of the people putting posts on here don’t get it. Stuff White People Like is a sarcastic joke, not a serious opinion about white people camping. Are you really sharing money-saving and camping tips with the author? That might even be more funny than this blog. Although, I must say as a white person who camps they are spot on for about 90% of the white camper population. I’m with Racheal, it’s sad that some of you can’t laugh at this and yourselves. We are a ridiculous people. Where should we camp this weekend?
that last line was the funniest!!
I used to enjoy camping, with a sniper rifle in Unreal Tournament.
things white people like:first-person shooter video games
There are many types of people. There are many types of white people.
Some like to camp. Some don’t.
There are more people who aren’t white camping than those who are.
REI is nice if you can get it. They have a 100% satisfaction policy. If you have something 10 years old that is from REI and just isn’t quite up to the standard of when you bought it 10 years ago, just return it and ask for a refund. Get some new REI gear!
Especially if you lost your corporate job since you bought your REI gear….
Enjoy,
SpaceMod
That’s what was missing on my camping trip-a kayak. I’m going to buy one today and if my husband asks why I bought one I’ll just tell him “Because white people like kayaks. I got the most expensive one, don’t worry.”
HAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA….LOVE THIS!!! Things that my white coworkers email to me…hilarious!!!
true. halo reach ftw
this site bloooooows!! obvious observations just repackaged. hope you guys make a billion off coffee books at urban outfitters. at least america is producing something. bad comedy. what’s the deal with white people!? what am i doing on here. gotta go shit on something else!
http://chrisiswhyimskinny.blogspot.com/
Very clever article 🙂
This website should be added to the list of things white folks like. being self-ironic and self-critical.
Mountain Johnny, you are brilliant. I just laughed myself silly all over again. Classic. Thanks.
You don’t find yourself trapped in the woods when you go camping. That is a survival situation. Camping is something you decide to do and prepare for. You don’t just trapped out there, unless you choose to. You are an amateur, how was this even published. You obviously don’t know how to camp. White people enjoy camping because this brings us back to our ROOTS, when we didn’t have to deal with this racist bullshit. When we could just say fuck off, and ignore racism. This is such nonsense. I enjoy a lot of your other posts, but you can’t talk about camping. You are too general
Get a life or get off the site. Your feelings are hurt about camping? Wah. Someone was obviously born without a funny bone…
Mountain Johnny, you’re brilliant!
This is so true! Ha, I love it. My family went camping every summer when I was growing up and it was always quite an experience. Tents being rained on…food being eaten by animals…arguing over which direction the beach REALLY is…
Another hilarious website was started by four college students in nyc. They highlight the hilarious aspects of waiting in lines, including those never ending lines for SNL tickets(something that seems to be hugely popular among white college students). It’s fantastic, read it here: http://www.inlinewaiting.com/2010/11/waiting-for-snl-saturday-night-live-tickets/
there is one camping “experience” above the rest — which is of course BURNING MAN — all the hazards of camping added to the world’s largest open bar — & longest senior prom (& where your parents — if they do go — are easily ditched).
no other campground combines halloween, xmas and pre-school dress-ups with so much un-breathable dust & loutish voyeurism plus the kind of narcissistic self importance only a fundamentalist sunday church social can offer.
naturally, gathering 50,000 paying customers to a desolate dry alkali lake bed with nothing more than porta-potties, ice & over-priced lattes on offer takes ALL the things white people like working in perfect unison — unpaid internships, passing, non-profits, gourmet obsession & a high tolerance for obnoxious artistic superiority.
which makes it an ideal ritual mating grounds for finding the breeder of your dreams (or a reasonable portrayal thereof).
join the club!
tickets for christmas are already on sale — get the gift that says white on rice today…
I love this, because this is one of the only true posts I’ve read so far!
white people really like summerstock theater, particularly shakespeare, and it is considered especially enjoyable in an outdoor setting (in the woods, hip downtown parks, or overlooking beautiful scenery). it may be paired with wine drinking, eating fancy french cheeses with a baguette and fruit either sitting in foldable, expensive camping chairs, or on a blanket. perhaps a picnic basket is how the whole foods snacks were transported. during these events, white people like to laugh really loud at fairly unfunny old jokes, just to prove to the other audience members they understand the awkward old english of the script. a follow-up discussion is required with fellow audience members at the overly expensive theater cafe where they proceed to critique the theatrical production, trying to impress on everyone listening they are well versed in theatrical terminology and absolutely creative enough to have fascinating comments that would have improved their experience there. they will then drive home in their kias.
This. Also, breathing.
I’ve always wanted to go camping. I was so bent upon camping that i researched a lot into the equipment that is needed etc. But now, I have my own fears. what if i came face to face with a wild animal. Although there would be a group of people, I’m not sure if I’m ready to face that trauma. Thanks mate, for showing the real side of camping. I’m sure most people would agree by what u said.
OMG! This is sooooooooooooooo funny and true. My parents are from rural India, so they pretty much grew up camping, they think we are nuts when we tell them we want to go camping! So great!
The instinct to camp is why White people spread out across the world, for better or worse. Most other races stayed where they were born or within close proxminty. They did little exploring and little or no settling. Just intrepid I guess.
Been there ; done that !!!!
Holy shit what an ignorant comment. How do you think “most other races” got to where they were in the first damn place? Most of the places that white people “discovered” were populated by dark-skinned peoples that had beaten them there by hundreds if not thousands of years. “Most other races” were centuries ahead of whites when it comes to exploring and settling.
Think about the journey that native Americans had to make: Over thousands of years, human tribes swarmed out of Africa into southwest Asia, ACROSS THE ASIAN CONTINENT, up to northwest Asia, across the land bridge to Alaska, and then spread out all over Canada and the United States, down to Central America, and all over South America. Think about other places ALL AROUND THE WORLD populated by “most other races”: Asia, Australia, the Pacific Islands. The Pacific Islands! In their little tiny canoes! That took some balls!
For you to say that “other races” just stayed where they were at and were not intrepid? wow. just wow
……really? was that necessary?
anyway
looks like this blog/web site is done for good.
what a shame. i thought these articles were all very funny and frighteningly on the mark.
seriously… agreed. saying it once makes you at best insightful, and at worst racist yourself. saying it 952 times just makes you a moron. and what does the existence of God have to do it at all?
Nope – a few years later with Someoneelse (Mrs. Somewhitegirlsdad.)
JohnnyG, are you kidding? How do you think mankind spread over the globe? People didn’t just pop up white in Europe! the globe was populated by a relatively small band of Africans who left Africa and spread through the middle east, far east, Europe, and eventually America. And note that the Native Americans, who are not white, got there before the whites.
This explanation is way too complex. The only reason we go camping is to get away from black people. Since black people hate camping, the only way to be absolutely sure you won’t run into them is to go camping. Simple.
So true. Im a black woman and I pitched the idea to my friends who are all back to go camping one weekend. It didn’t fly with them lol! I ask one of my white coworkers, and she was like “Awsome!! I LOVE camping!!” Smh… lmao!
White people, well all people, also enjoy http://www.NakedHipster.com. Mainly because the girls are hot and don’t have clothes on. Usually those two things go well together. You know, the hotness and the nakedness.
Hahaha!
I never thought of it this way, but you sure have a point! 😀
or iceskating… don’t forget iceskating…
You’re so stupid. I’m sure a ridiculously ignorant, immature and humorless comment came from a boy who lacks companionship. People don’t want anything to do with someone like you, much less black people. You must be one of the most pathetic people I’ve come across and you can believe I’m looking down my nose at you.
I like nature and I enjoy being around trees, animals, and plants, but I tend to think of camping as “being willfully homeless for a weekend.” Sure it could be an interesting experience but with the possibility of mosquitoes, ticks, bad weather, snakes, bears, poison Ivy, poison oak, poison snakes, hell poison bears (you never know)… it seems like a better idea to just go to the park for an afternoon. At least that way you don’t haveto sleep in a tent.
It’s an excuse to be drunk and do drugs… No one goes camping without alcohol. Hardcore drinking and playing in the water usually and sometimes killing animals.
I think overall this website is directed at a certain type of white person. That being an upper/middle class generally well educated white person. I think if you asked a redneck about the world cup, raybans, or if he/she liked sweaters or pea coats – they’d punch you in the balls.
It should be http://www.stuffrichcollegeeducatedwhitepeoplelike.com
Yes, exactly. It should be re-titled what libs like. I don’t dislike them but this list hits all the stereotypes associated with white, educated liberals.
This article made me laugh even though it’s not that accurate in my case, it’s pretty funny!
I own tons of camping gear, none of which I bought at REI, which is ridiculously overpriced and geared (excuse the pun) towards that more wealthy weekend warrior type of camper.
I never camp at campgrounds where I have to pay a fee, I prefer remote wilderness areas where I can hike and wrestle with bears if need be. (kidding about the bears) I’m glad most people hate this kind of experience, it leaves more wilderness area for me!
a black person ain doin no campin. we need too much stuff
us black folk aint doin no campin. we need to much. might as well bring da house
pretty funny! but this mainly talks about hippies, look at the guy in the picture..wearin SANDALS haha. living in boulder, well, theres a lot of them…and every word i just read was true. i my self dont care about gas powered cars driving up the mt. nor have all that gear from r.e.i
im a metal head, skateboarder..you can say im a “hesher”
all i need for a campin trip is
1. a 30 of pbr
2. some pot
3. b.b gun
4. music
5. cheap food
6.tent
7….well thats pretty much it
an yes the national forest is the way to go, camp grounds are for family’s..
Camping lol.brings to mind every white person i have ever known’s obsession with the “bonfire bro”.Ahh the lengths this species will go through an attempt to get laid.
However i should say id much rather hang out at a “bonfire bro” any friday night tossing back coronas rather than getting shot at some banger party.Bummer.
A hunting rifle, a knife, a tent, and a tarp and I’m happy.
You are freaking hilarious-but correct on most of these things lol you should do one on atving
You is the funniest thing I have read for a while -camping as described is for some so true – but I have a confession. I am a camping dude. But a bit more simple. And just only a few days ago, my daughter said, “I love our holidays”. I asked why – -and she said Nooooooooooooo electricity, Nnnnnnnnnnnno Computers, Nooooooooooooooo mobile phones, Noooooooooooooo television, and the list went on and on, and by the time she was finshed I had to confess that what most of us are forced to live like in a manufactured world, really is so much crap. The only solution for me is to count the days ahead until I ggo on my camping holidays.
Peace!
All you need is a tent to go camping. I like nature. And I feel bad for anyone who can’t handle it, because if you ever find yourself stuck in it, you’ll have a 90 percent less chance of survival. Man up people.
– signed
White guy
camping is the worst thing ever invented in the world.
WOW, lets hope you never get put into a situation where you HAVE to camp. Camping isn’t easy nor is it always fun. But, you do get in touch with your resourcefulness. You also learn to appreciate and love simple things in life (like dry feet!)
I was molested on a camping trip when I was 40, I will never shower again, or bathe. I smell of shit, but nobody is up in my asshole.
So camping is not only expensive, hurts the environment, but it is true that the only people I know that have EVER been camping are white people, or people trying to fit in with other white people.
Bonding in white culture: go really far into the woods, kill some creatures, bring it home and cook on propane grills.
What an idiotic comment.
1) Hunters and fishermen eat what they kill. There are regulations and licenses involved to keep the populations healthy.
2) camping is cheap. The more primative, the cheaper. Those
of us that chose to go the more primative route are usually
very good about returning the site to a natural form. We
are the ones that pick up after the ones who don’t
respect the environment. Those that are camping in
state parks are not harming anything that has not been
harmed already (such as a CITY!)
3) Camping is NOT about killing. But, someone with your mentallity would not know this. Camping IS about being connected to other forms of life.
I just got back from a camping trip. We were eaten alive by mosquitoes and only caught enough fish to feed us for 2 days.
What I will remember most about this trip was going to sleep to the sounds of tree frogs and wolves and waking up to the sound of the common Loon. PRICELESS!
So, get a clue, or shut up.
That fucking allergy thing didn’t work! Now I’m going to a national park Sunday!
I was molested on a camping trip when I was 26. but i have feel much better with you, wicht time i m in camp i mam having lot’s of fun
I was molested on a camping trip when I was 26. but i have feel much better with you, wicht time i m in camp i mam having lot’s of fun
Geez, lighten up already!
Maybe this isn’t the website for you, do ya’ think?
I’m white. I go camping. I go to get out of the city life (Sacramento) I go hiking, backpacking, and go for day trips to the wilderness. I have NEVER harmed any animal or fish. The only thing I killed was mosquitoes. So get your facts straight, only psycho idiots hurt the wild life. I don’t even really believe in hunting. I also pick up after myself and others. It’s actually not that expensive if you buy your equipment over time and just not one day. I usually get my stuff and Cabela’s or REI, sometimes online. I drive my off road jeep or my truck depends on what I’m doing. NO PRIUS! I have NEVER seen a Prius in the mountains besides on the freeway haha. Unless your going to a campsite which is where idiotic people leave there trash behind, usually people that camp in campsites are city people. &&&& drive SUV’S. or camp trailers, Rv’s, ect. I cook on a little tiny stove or I bring food rations, or power bars. Some of my marine buddies that go camping with me are “black” and hispanic. There is A LOT of Asians up there too lol. Seriously people get your facts straight!
i agree completely, except i usually sleep good do to excessive alcohol abuse… i think.
+1
I am an avid camper, when I have time.
It’s the cheapest thing I do.
My list of supplies include:
1 4×4′ tarp / light wool blanket
parachute cord bought second hand
a bit of fishing twine and 2 hooks
pocket knife
flashlight
matches
And if I’m going for more than two or three days, I might include
map
bug spray
dehydrated or tinned food
survival blanket
I camp/hike all the time and take no offense at this. Really funny post. Silly humans.
I love camping.
Stick a big pole up my ass, set up the tent, just like my faggot days in the boy scouts.
if I’m going for more than two or three days, I might include
map
bug spray
dehydrated or tinned food
survival blanket
Ok, maybe you don’t camp in the manner described by this article. Are you denying that there are or may be a great number of people, especially white people, who do? This blog is about white people being stereotyped. These stereotypes might not apply to all white people. But they apply to enough white people to give them a kernel of truth. That is what makes stereotypes both funny and insidious. High time us white folks had to deal with stereotyping.
Get a grip.
: ) Well said…
This explains camping perfectly. And thanks, ill remember the allergy thing next time people invite me.
I’m white, but I really, really hate camping.
Superior white people like me love to camp.
I love wearing my heels and lil panties when camping, oh and Rudi bends me over and rams me, heaven!
The only thing that comes into my mind when I hear camping?
Boy scouts. Do you need a roadmap to figure what I’m thinking?
Did I say BOY scouts?
Yesssss, I love them lil tykes.
Butt only for camping mind you, no other reason!
Really.
Yes, BOY scou….oops!
us white people can be more like you people,but we work for our money so we can pay taxes to the goverment for the resources that keep most of your kind alive everday.
Woow, really? I work for my money and pay taxes as well. I’m white now. I’m amazed.
This comment is absolutely ridiculous. I don’t have any idea who you are however I highly recommend that you think before you react… Seriously…?!?!
Have a great day!
RE: ‘BIT ME”
funny stuff. the serious comments made are equally funny.
seriously people, you find stereotyping not entirely acurate? wow, how observant. how could that happen?
grow thicker skin and get a sense of humor.
Then they will drive for an extended period of time to a national park
a rescue is seen as relatively positive in white culture
relaxing time
The only thing that comes into my mind when I hear camping?
Boy scouts. Do you need a road-map to figure what I’m thinking?
Did I say BOY scouts?
Yesssss, I love them lil tykes.
Butt only for camping mind you, no other reason!
Really.
Any lil tykes out there? Hey, just asking, AGAIN, is that sooooooo wrong?
because of their free spirits, overprivileged upbringing, white-collar careers and hedonistic lifestyle, white people love the feeling of being impoverished, but only for a short period of time. They’ve got to get back home to check their company e-mail, check out the episode of Lost they missed on Netflix, and take their chocolate lab to his play-date.
monclerbilligjacken.com
positive in white culture
moncler –erter
wow! hater!
This proves that my mother is not white. When I was a kid I asked her why we didn’t go camping (like the other white people). She said that people had spent thousands of years trying to reach the point of not having to live that way so she wasn’t going to do it in her leisure time.
whoever wrote this article must either be a dumb bitch or some pussy guy who suffers from a lack of testerone. be a man not a bitch
Whoever wrote this post must be either a dumb bitch who’s not be able to recognize satire or some meathead guy with low intellect.
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On point! I’m still laughing! The last sentence – I thought this many times when invited to go camping!!!
I’m latina, my husband is American. We got a Subaru from his parents and one day I asked him: Is a Subaru a white people kind of car? He said: Yes, just go and check “stuffwhitepeoplelike.com”
What you explain in your blog is something that you think camping is all about. Camping isn’t for everyone but it’s something that can be fun. It doesn’t have to be a one night thing. I, myself, live in Montana and if you have never camped before it’s an odd thing. And saying I’m from Montana you all probably think that there is only white people. WRONG. and that we all ride horses to school. WRONG. Montana is like anywhere else in the world. no different. Or you could think I am white myself. WRONG. Pacific Islander. I absolutely love camping and use my gear quite a bit. Probably one of the best investments I have ever made. Normally, when people camp, it’s three days or more! At first it sounds dreadful but soon, after awhile, you learn to love the outdoors. During the day you can fish along the rivers and catch dinner and/or hike to another location. Maybe higher on the mountain. I wouldn’t say it’s a white people thing. Camping is just something people misjudged way too quickly because they haven’t really experienced it with people who know what to do. Oh and my best friend is African American and he is from New Jersey. Most of his family travel to the Rocky Mountains to hunt and camp all the time. I know a variety of races that love to camp. I just believe that you just say it is white because you have no idea and you are clueless to what it really is. Even if you say you “experienced” it. I would say one experience in a place next to a big city does’t count. Get in the middle of no where and just don’t be stupid. Be informed and use common sense and just relax. You’ll be surprised what you begin to love or may not. You just never know.
He has no idea what camping is. Sorry but he wrote this with the lack of intelligence of what camping really is.
you know, this is just meant to be funny, take it as it is, and not as an insult to your soul!
You’re an RV-er, aren’t you?!?
maybe you are here
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I could have sworn I wrote this. Great read.
You racist fuck, you are a embarrassment.
Seriously it’s a joke, it called self deprecating humor, and it’s also funny. Coming from someone who does spend time outdoors and has been involved in the occasional jaunt back to “nature”.
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I was going to ad this site to http://www.culturallycool.com the problem is some people take this too seriously. These articles are just observations that do not claim that every white are evolved in these activities everyday.
I really think that it should be moderated and keep the racist comments out.
Yes I will volunteer.
As an avid camper, I thought this was both hilarious and 100% accurate.
I camped out at Mels scumbag world and took it up my white asshole, how cool am I?
Hi, lame autospammer. There features you mention are known as “layouts” and have been part of every other text processing programme that has existed since the late 1970s. Textform and Scribe, for instance, and the relative newcomer, LaTeX. Fracking nroff was more easily configurable than the disaster Microsoft has inflicted on the world. So go peddle yoru crapware somewhere else.
I shit pants on a camp out, it happens, white people just smile, know you have a loaf in your pants.
Monatnan at heart? Really? Monatnan? And you pretend to think this is a serious article? so funny!
Monatnan you are a comic genius!
See ya in Montana one day!
Ditto!
So funny!
This one is a good one… I camp cheap, though, no expensive equipment, and would rather spend my entire life camping. Why would someone want to be in a city anyway for any length of time? Unfortunately, the camping regulations right now are such, though, that one may be much less noise, overcrowding and pollution in a populated city than in one of the campgrounds in summer (in Yosemite year-round–hope they cut down on Yosemite visitation and ban trailers from there, it’s about time)
This could be combined with something else white people do: hunting with antiquated and obsolete weapons. While you may think on the surface that white people would not do this as it violates the rights of cuddly woodland creatures and owning a firearm is only done by the wrong kind of white people, you should know that advanced white people sometimes figure out that the only way to get the ultimate in free-range/organic/hormone-free/antibiotic-free meat is to get out there and kill it yourself. But going to Wal-Mart and buying a cheap, yet well-made Remington with a synthetic stock is not an option. White people must either bow hunt (a nod to indigenous cultures whose destruction they feel guilty about and who would have traded anything, up to and including women for a Winchester) or get a muzzle loader. They will say things like “It’s not about killing, it’s about the challenge”. These advanced white people will hunt with anything from a pre-’64 Winchester to a Mosin-Nagant (the Mosin combines two things white people are fond of, the hyphenated name and the former socialist worker’s paradise). Hunting also allows white people to buy expensive European clothing. Long coats with patches on the front where the stock meets the shoulder are popular, as are red flannel jackets and deer stalker hats (only when worn for irony). You can meet more white people hunting quail and pheasant than anything else. This allows them to have fancy French food that they would not normally be able to get. Trader Joe’s, it seems, does not sell pheasants. Hunting these elusive little creatures requires lots of walking around outdoors and highly intelligent English breeds of dog, not to mention a $1,000.00 plus Italian or Spanish shotgun. Hunting upland game birds gives white people yet one more opportunity to poke fun at the Bush administration, “Make sure I’m out of the way when you shoot, I don’t want to end up like Dick Cheney’s friend. Every white person has a secret fantasy of sitting in a rustic hunting/ski lodge in front of a stone fireplace with a fine glass of top-shelf bourbon or single-malt scotch. Note: never bring up the general messiness of cleaning the game, it will make white people cringe and their patina covered rifle/shotgun will sit in a closet collecting even more rust.
I believe the fishing version of this would be fly fishing. We fantasize about salmon fishing in places like Scotland or the Rockies and think of fly fishing as more pure and pristine. Unfortunately many of us live in climates that trout can’t naturally tolerate and the state game department stocks the streams. Meanwhile a kid fishing in a farm pond for bluegill or a bass fisherman are both at least fishing for native species.
Camping requires too much thought and preparation for most non-Whites. White people also seem to be generally less materialistic, therefore, they can honestly enjoy nature.
Camping is the bourgeoisie romanticizing the experience of being poor.
they cut down on Yosemite visitation and ban trailers from there, it’s about time)
livesean nikyot
Some of us just really like camping… for real!
I camped out at the seasons 4 once, with my boyfriend Barry, from accounting, he got herpes, we went homo.
Hmm. A blog written by an idiot. Trust me when I say, please stay in your city.
I would like to camp out in a mens room, ah the smell of urine in the morning!
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fuck boots, I want a hot cock up my faggy asshole, creme me.
What’s up, all is going fine here and ofcourse every one is sharing facts, that’s in fact
good, keep up writing.
I went camping at an oasis in the Moroccan desert. A poisonous scorpion almost stung my boyfriend on the family jewels. Later a generator went off in the night. He thought he was in combat and jumped up from his sleeping bag and almost strangled me. I love camping.
It is pretty obvious that you don’t like To. go camping. .its outrageously obvious that you are a non white person that has an extreme hate for white people. You should move your article to the rascal site….
camping is great when camping next to the beach, a lake, a river. camping is awesome for those who are not lazy no matter what nationality you are. camping is the best if you like waking up in the morning and not stepping into a hotel hallway and stepping into the world, camping is spectacular to sit in front of a fire and roast marsh mellows instead of sitting in a 4 walled room watching television. camping is fun when you share the experience with friends. Camping is not for the lazy. you must cook your own meals instead of sitting in a restaurant and being served.
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I love camping. Especially the part where I get to break clays at 50 yards with an ak knock-off. Or blow up some tannerite.
I stopped camping a few years ago when all the Mexicans decided to give it a try. Not much fun trying to enjoy the outdoors when the next campsite over is 5 tents with 20 people in them listening to loud music at 3am. Another nice white activity ruined.
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Actually I don’t know anyone who actually camps in a tent . We “camp” in tricked out RV’s parked next to our friends tricked out RV’s at a campground full of activities where our kids play together while we drink by a bonfire . Yeah that’s horrible .
im not white yet i love camping. its what you make of it honestly. whether you go with family or friends, whether you get lost in the woods or follow the trails and see beautiful lookout points. whether you get eaten alive by bugs or stay in your tent and talk smack and play cards. i had nasty food on camping trips but also steaks, cinnabons (baked there) and peach cobbler(also made near the fire in a dutch oven) .when you do camp go with a group of friends who know what they are doing and stay away from people you dont know. some crazies play loud music or od on alcohol. all in all a fun hobby but do your research before you try it. otherwise all the bad stereotypes will happen to you.
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Because when one is “roughing it” it becomes more acceptable to accomplish nothing, eat unhealthy foods, eschew personal hygiene, and make roaring fires (whilst drunk). Those who say camping is more work than not are missing the point. Sure, there’s a lot of prep and setup, but once that’s done, you can completely let yourself go.
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Wow! I came across this blog while researching camping spots for summer 2014. First of all, very hilarious “stuff white people like” author. Really, you have nailed it. Though obviously from my first sentence, I am one of those people who LOVE camping. We are more glampers, than campers. We have air mattresses, and a two-room tent that sleeps 15 people though we use it for two adults and a 4 year old. We like to get tricked out a bit more each year and spend the whole year pining for our next summer of camping. Being in trees is healthy, you don’t have to eat camp food – I made a delicious smoked salmon risotto last summer. Yum! And if you get the right spot you can fall asleep to the sound of waves crashing against the shore or the wind in the trees. Though it’s true, every meal can take a long time what with the preparing of the fire, the meal and the cleaning up so that the bears don’t destroy your campsite overnight. And if I can amuse my kid for 3 days pretending that the local chipmunk is our new pet – Super!
But it is a pretty nutso thing to do – if aliens looked down on us they would wonder what the heck we were doing for sure and bottom line is that it’s a primarily white thing to do! Honestly, there aren’t very many black people camping in Ontario, Canada. A friend of mine (black) practically has to drag her family along to get them out for a week a year. But the funny thing we have noticed over the years is that the Chinese community LOVE camping. To the point where it’s probably 50/50. So awesome! Oh, and though I’m white, my husband is Indian, so go figure.
I’d love to know if the author actually loves camping or not. I bet he does. How can you not, eh? ha ha.
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My father grew up on a farm in Alabama that had no power until he grew up and moved out. He thinks camping is stupid and can’t imagine why anyone would want to do it. And looking back on my two school camping experiences I have absolutely no desire to do it again.
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I love camping, particularly wilderness camping from the Jeep or backpacking, and I thought this post was rather funny. I’m pretty sure that this is exactly how many people feel when camping… never got it myself. I’d much rather be out in the wild than indoors most times, although being in the wild for several days makes me appreciate civilization more. I suppose its like sports, throwing a ball around for no reason while having people yell at you for doing it wrong has never looked remotely fun to me, and spending three days being eaten by bugs and walking through poison oak in 100 degree heat doesn’t look remotely fun to someone else.
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We go camping because we like it, simple as that. Funny thing is this article is written by some fool who has never been camping yet whines endlessly about it. Were the ones camping yet were not complaining. Hiking, fishing, rafting with a cooler full of beer, bonfires, swimming in a real body of water instead of a piss filled city pool. Theres more to camping than “walking around”. Man up and quit crying. Oh and im a Southside Chicagoan born and raised, so much for the stereotypical yuppie theory.
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I’m not white and I love camping. And in response to that comment about camping and people with IQ’s over 45, I realize you may be joking but camping is generally a requirement for all long term outdoors on site scientific research – think geology, biology, etc. – or short term academic field studies – as you would do in a geology or biology class. Moreover, you actually learn a lot about the environment and ecological systems, especially up in the mountains.
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I’m white,and you won’t ever catch my ass camping.I don’t drink beer,hunt or fish neither.I hate country music.I like football,my own bed,the stickiest of the ickie,the beach.Have I covered all the stereotypes?Black people,there are some stereotypes bout yawl ya know?Women not bathing to avoid messing up their weaves.Smothering cocoa butter to cover stink and ashy elbows.Never getting off your ass because you all don’t like creasing your shoes.I personally think wer’e all different but equally weird in our own ways.I was just pointing out stereotypes are a two way street.And most of the stuff you think about white people isn’t true.I’s a characature of rednecks 50 years ago,that Richard Pryor put in your heads.We don’t act like y’all are still house Uncle Toms.Black people do nerdy white things,and white people have negro tendencies.Not everything any race does is a golden nugget.
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“The wrong kind of white people”, I’m dying. I will not be accepting “allergies” as an excuse to not go camping. Also, is it bad that I feel like I should buy a kayak now? Am I missing the author’s point, because that seems like really good reasoning to me.
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Was gonna leave some flame reply about the racist premise of your blog, but the last 23 replies (certainly by non-white people who can’t even compose a simple sentence in English) proved that your blog is so irrelevant as to not warrant my, or any other thinking human’s full scorn….but still…
Just like the first (future) Europeans, who tired of the continuous tribal warfare in Africa and opted to instead migrate thousands of miles north and risk starvation and/or freezing to death closer to the arctic circle, their modern day descendants would rather swat mosquitoes, and crap in a hole in the ground than put up with the contemporary equivalent/descendents of the very same warring tribal assholes their ancestors worked so hard to get away from all those millennia ago. Some folks are born to create conflict, some are born to avoid it. Guess which folks are your ancestors?
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omg I laughed so hard.I am black and grew up in a white family.They do love camping and so do I.My fiance who is white never been skiing, he went camping a few times.Trying to get him to go camping so our son is not totally a city boy.
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hahaha, I did a search on ” how many people in the U.S. like camping” and THIS came up! I did the search to figure out if it would be worth it to write a book about camping with your family. I have decided it IS worth it, it might help other WHITE people to get out of cities and away from racists like you….
Listen, not every person that has “white skin” is an American WASP and can be stereotyped into somewhat common habits of the WASP group. Just look a bit outside your typical US suburb – look at NY, for example – we have a whole bunch of different kinds of white people here – so not sure what is the purpose of this reverse-racist post. “That group is that way and it sucks, and I am differet and better” – is this supposed to be the point someone is making in this post? That’s a dangerous route to think by.
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Can’t believe how many people commenting here have no sense of humor. I’m white, from a working class family. We never went camping nor did anyone in my neighborhood – any kind of camping including in an RV – who could afford an RV? Left the hood, went to college with upper middle class white people who loved camping. I HATE it! Why would I want to spend my time on vacation without electricity, running water, or a comfortable bed? That’s a vacation? Not for me!
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Camping is the best way to free yourself from urban lifestyle and take the challenges of life. you are right camping is not as much simpler as it seems to be.it takes multi-days for a good camping experience.
Maybe you might even like to share your family camping experiences with other campers.http://myfamilytent.com
There’s certainly a lot to learn about this topic.
I really like all the points you’ve made.
If you’re only using your camping gear once you’re a tool with too much money ditto the people with an RV. You buy camping gear and use it as often as possible until it falls apart and MUST be replaced.
Some people just find it relaxing to go somewhere every weekend where the nearest person is miles away and there is no cell phone reception.
I personally love camping, although backpacking and hitting the crags are my favorite. Unfortunately it does put a huge hole in your pocket but once you gear up you hardly have to spend anything on future hikes/climbs. I’m from the OlyPen of WA state and one of my favorite backpacking trips was when I was heading up to this place called the Two Brothers, I ran into these two milano college girls about a quarter mile past Lena lake and we all decided to camp together. I had brought a bottle of white wine and a 5th of rum just for these exact circumstances.lol Before you know it I had these two half black girls butt naked and pulling my pants off. Just goes to show what a little alcohol and a friendly card game of Egyptian Rat Fuck can do for you on a spring hike in the mountains. You don’t meet very many black chicks like these, wearing Patagonia and North face with semi straight hair and tight, light skinned bodies. When I look back on it, it was probably one of my favorite trips. So yeah, sometime black people actually do like the “great outdoors” I guess it’s more of a personal preference than a race thing. But personally, I’m white… So who really knows?
Only black people would find it difficult to put up a tent with instructions, cook food, hell even eat food that’s not in a paper bag, and there is absolutely no scope to show off or no reason to be loud with no one to hear you shout at the top of your voices all the shit that you usually talk about, so that excludes all people of color. Your donk cars wont do well in the mud and it just reminds you of being on the farm, a farm that some white guy owns, and that don’t sit well with the brothers.. and there is usually some dogs floating around which blacks don’t dig either.
I have read your article post. I love this post, really enjoy when people understand how important outdoor family time is. I Love camping, we like to do back country hiking and camp in the mountains. I like camping in a trailer but this year my kids want to go tenting so i figure i will give it a shot! Thank’s for sharing.
It makes me sad to see people commenting and equating camping/backpacking/kayaking/canoeing with being homeless, going backward, etc. Comments like this: Why would I want to spend my time on vacation without electricity, running water, or a comfortable bed? That’s a vacation?” Problem is that people associate camping with
This is a larger issue and speaks volumes to the lack of knowledge on the environment, protecting nature, understanding wildlife. It is also an insult to all aboriginal peoples who thrived in the natural environment (and sadly Europeans took that away). It instills the myth that they were somehow backward because now we live in huge urban conglomerates, dependent on economies that rape the earth.
It pains my heart to know that there are so many people who don’t know what the night sky looks like and the beauty of the stars. Who don’t know solitude. Who don’t appreciate the spiritual aspect of nature and who feel no connection with it. Who don’t know the thrill of canoeing. NATURE is the ultimate reality. They fail to see why spending time outdoors is important. And when they do camping, they do it wrong for all the wrong reasons.
Sites like this and it’s equal “Stuff Black People Like” were created to be humorous but have turned into the usual hate speech filled nonsense.
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Black people are racist. This website is proof.
Camping is a stuff adventurous people like to do. this is not the thing confined to white people only. you have written a good post. thanks for explaining the process of making the right tent for camping.
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Got mixed opinions while reading the blog and the comments. Regardless with the white people they might know what will they like and do.
The most commented post about outdoor camping and it’s not on the number 1 spot? What magic the internet really has!
Nice article by the way, never mind being racist, at least we really know what we want. Oh yeah, one more thing. When you said that camping is a potentially lethal activity that will cost you a large amount of both time and money, i clearly disagree with that. I’ve been camping on most of my weekends, and it doesn’t cost that much, I just need my bike, my Serac Hammock, a bag full of chips, canned foods and nutella, I’m off the road in no time.
If this post puts even a few more people off the idea of camping, great. Just that much more peace and quiet for me and my tent.
I mean, you want campers to stand or hang out by your site? Public county parks are full of crazies and young adult couples moaning through the night .
Ya I love to camp, no need to wash, just let a shit rip where you are, just be an unleashed drunken high white type scumbag, wear a sheet if you want.
They love cigars too
Thanks a bunch for sharing this with all folks you really know what you are speaking approximately! Bookmarked. Kindly also consult with my site =). We could have a link exchange agreement among us
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Very raciest. If some thing like this was written about another race all hell would have broken out.
Your entire blog is disgusting, and racist. This post is a joke, as is your entire, moronic blog. Sigh. This is one of the problems with the internet – everyone suddenly fancies himself an author, just because he knows how to print his name. Oh, well, the blog trend will ween, and talent-free “authors” like you will fade into nothing. I have no idea why you think this post is whitty. It’s nothing. Blank. Not well written, no style, not funny, just nothing to it at all. Dull. Childish. It reads like a bored monkey wrote it.
Hahaha loved this entry! Being a whitey I have done camping on several occasions. But still fail to see the fun of it. Gimme a nice hotel room anytime!
I’d like to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this site.
I really hope to check out the same high-grade content from
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motivated me to get my very own blog now 😉
Definition of camping : Modified Homelessness
great blog really enjoyed it thanks http://www.campwithoutlimits.com/
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I have gone camping since I was a kid. Because I had these survival skills, I survived homelessness, otherwise I would have just ended it all.
Yes, SOME white people fit the category of ” dumb Ass” but so do many Black people . Camping is NOT some cultural thing only done by whites.
I have seen an increasing number of Mexicans inhabit state parks.
If you are rich enough to go on vacation, take a cruise, or sign up for some guided tour of Europe. If you happen to be middle class, just stay home and bar be Que and watch your baby sitter ( T.V.) A vacation today is only for the wealthy, so better just eliminate that word from your vocabulary!
I thought it pretty funny how you summed up camping. I am an outdoor nut, so that includes camping. Oh, the prep work, driving, finding a spot, and then throwing away creature comforts. Why would someone go right? In a strange way, leaving the hustle and bustle of the city behind for a while brings some peace. Nature reminds us we are miniscule and she could potentially ruin humanity at any time. Connecting with her is connecting with reality. Fishing, hiking, watching wildlife, or the breeze blow through the trees; while disregarding time, can be invigorating. Interesting enough, there’s a lack of drama. No phones ringing. No insane left or right leaning politics. No internet blogs, Facebook or Youtube drama. No racism. No kids screaming about video games and sitting on their fat lazy asses, melting their brains. Far less mean people. It’s just nature. The stress between camping and city life is far different. If you’re not comfortable in your own skin, human nature, nature, and open spaces, then yeah, camping is not for you. In the city, everyone acts and drives like an asshole. People are selfish, rude and narcissistic. Out in nature, people are almost always friendly and will help you if you need it. Out in nature, prejudism seems to take a back seat. White, asian, black, indian, and latino; people seem to get along better. I’m 41 and I’ve never ever came across a jerk in the woods or desert in all of the states I’ve been in. That’s saying something because everyone was a different race, various ages, and cultures. Nature is the great equalizer. Aside from watching wildlife and exploring, I leave the city because people suck when they are in the city. I’ve never seen so many miserable humans in my life. There’s something to be said about simplicity. Not saying camping or the outdoors is easy. I’m just saying it’s simple. Also, if and when the SHTF, who do you think you’ll look to in rolling blackouts, civil unrest, and catastrophies? People who can camp. They have emergency supplies and coping skills to adjust to certain kinds of hardship. Disasters have actually demonstrated that. Many campers have basic coping or survival skills that many others just don’t have. I’ve seen it first hand. To each their own I guess, but I’ll just keep in camping anyways. I’m not rich, far from it. I’m at the bottom of middle class. I grew up pretty much poor the first several years of my life and we still went camping. You don’t have to have a lot of money, you just have to be smart.
What is wrong with camping? I love it. Yeah you don’t shower for a couple days and you sleep outside, so what. If I want to shower I just go home and go back because I live in the country and only have to go a few miles for a lake or river. You eat good food, ever heard of a campfire or grill, and most people love bacon and eggs in the morning hell you can even have biscuits. You swim, fish or explore all day and maybe read a book or play cards or a board game. At night you climb into a tent with a sleeping bag or air mattress for those with a bad back. Camping isn’t for everyone and that is fine but I really find it hard to believe only white people do it.
What a bunch of BS. I go camping for months at a time, but according to this article I guess I’m white for doing so, despite being a Zuni girl. I guess my father and his father before him were white too. It’s because of these articles that minorities ban themselves from enjoying anything nice. Camping for the inexperienced is tough at first, but so is anything unfamiliar. Camping is as nice as you make it. I prefer to rough it out because it boosts my self-sufficiency and confidence. That should a disaster hit, I’m prepared and can help others who don’t know how to survive outside their homes. And before anyone tells me that my ancestors met some bad fates in the woods due to whites. No kidding? Guess what though? I’m not my stinking ancestors, I make my OWN history. I don’t live in the past. Especially if it prevents me from enjoying anything in life because it’s deemed white. Camping doesn’t belong to white people. It doesn’t belong to any race. If I camp, that is my experience. MINE. Just like anything else in this stupid site. I can take all of this and make it mine.
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Your article is clearly Racist and bigoted. Camping or any other activity does NOT qualify you to be classified into some stereotype. I have a friend is is a poor black man and he plays golf with the elite white men of my church, so does this make him some “oreo” ? He does NOT fit that description.
Please stop with your slanted view points because you are generalizing.
Being an ex Boy scout leader, I taught survival techniques to boys, and camping was one of these skills I taught, It boosted the self esteem of these boys. I see camping in a totally different light than you do.
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If there is ANT intelligence left on planet Earth it is NOT in your house!
Most of these replies really show the stupidity of American people. Our concepts are so distorted that its pathetic! And to think, we all drive on the same freeways, eat at the same restaurants and drink the same city water!
I drove a truck interstate, so that makes me 300 pounds, dumb ass and
void of language skills?
I went camping, so now I am harming the environment and killing wild game
with pre 1964 rifles?
I don’t agree with most of these negative comments here, your concepts
only show your stupidity.
Camping is NOT a racial thing confined to “white people” and ALL white
people do not fit into one category just like ALL black people don’t fit one category. I saw one man in Yosemite National Park park his motor home,
turn on the generator and sit inside watching his TV all weekend long. He
never came outside that R.V. that was HIS camping experience.
To you city folks that smoke your crack anywhere you want to:
your lifestyle and world view are distorted beyond belief. Our Earth
was NOT created a concrete jungle, or a government project, Our Earth
was created with rivers, trees, wildlife and edible plants. Mankind rebelled
against this environment and built his own concrete prison. So, if I do not partake in that hostile environment, I am somehow a “freak” ?
It’s just all delusional ! If I were to write an article about Black people smoking crack in the park, would I be called “a racist” ?
I must thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this blog. I’m hoping to check out the same high-grade content from you in the future as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my very own website now 😉
Racist piece of shit,…. What you need black people for, going to the hood to buy crack, bad idea unless you are with a black man. Wanna start a riot great idea, but isn’t gonna work unless you have about a thousand + black boys and girls, wanna piss and moan because “you got no rights” you got it better than any white man these days. It’s fucked up how you racist black people hate white people, when not one of us black or white had anything to. do with any of this shit how many fucking years ago was that. Not one of you black motherfuckers wants to realize white’s were fucking slaves to an were not dwellin on it, why? Didn’t happen to us, didn’t happen to our parents, didn’t happen to our grandparents, didn’t happen to their parents. And it didn’t to yours either. It’s fucked up you motherfuckers still teach your children that your so fucking deprived, and your parents are such a slave to the white man. I have never came in contact with a racist black man, singler. But you get more than one together they fuckin hate white’s you motherfuckers need to settle down, nobody ‘black or white’ has anything to be upset about personality. Blame your media, blame your government, blame the rumors that you hear, but don’t keep feeding in to the fucked up bullshit that they keep trying and succeeding at to get us to hate each other.
I WENT INTO REI AND BOUGHT THIS SPORK I USE IT EVERY DAY! AND THE KNIFE WILL CUT ANYTHING. HENCE YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR. IF YOU WANT TO BUY EVERY THING AT WALMART 2 OR 3 TIMES OVER THATS UP TO YOU. I REALLY DONT UNDERSTAND THIS KIND OF RACISM IN 2017.
Lol none of you nig Nog’s and half breeds would last a week without electricity. 2 mill years and they still don’t know how to farm in big not land. Jealousy is all I see here.
Black people are more racist than whites, I was told to get out of a Black area of the city when I drove an interstate truck. They did not like any whites coming over there. Blacks and Hispanics have zero survival skills!
Absolutely spot-on! And reveals so many hidden truths, too! Very observant. Hilarious because of this!
This is hysterical. I never understood the passion for camping. I went once with a youth group over 40 years ago and that was enough!
And people say nïggërs aren’t racists! SMH…
Stuff that white people like…at number 128 – Camping is what scouts do and I’ve heard, through an article written by Clark Kent, for The Daily Planet, that Superman was a scout once upon a time. And, scouts do camping the best way possible. I like camping and eating canned food, if that’s what white people do!
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Amen !!! Going on my first camping trip in a travel trailer with my mama’s boy redneck husband .. yeah sounds like a blast .. NOT!!! You are spot on this has costed a fortune !! In addition to what you pay for a rolling coffin itself then all the crap to stock it .. Holy cow .. !!! Can’t I just have a root canal instead !!!!
If you can’t survive in the woods for ten days with only a hatchet, fire steel, and a knife, you lose. Nothing better than being in the woods away from civilization. Especially in the winter. Thank God for my Neanderthal DNA!
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Gigi, You can have your root canal, I’ll go catch a rainbow trout or 3 and cook them using my $65.00 coleman camp stove, Nothing better than getting riled
out of our tent at 3 a.m. by a black bear looking for a free fish to eat!
You city life sissies would not survive without your daily junk food orgies
and you T.V. sets. May God help you when the power supply gets
bombed by terrorists ( ANTIFA) and your water supply gets poisoned
by Joe Biden supporters!
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Ha ha, this is a great post. Using allergies to get out of camping is brilliant. Although, if you live near the water, I’d recommend a kayak (but not the $1200 one brand new)
I wish it was still true.
I rarely find white people now willing to go for a hike, climb.
Some reasons I enjoy these activities:
Reminds me of childhood (grown up poor somewhere in Eastern Europe under soviets), being outdoors offered me a sense of freedom, an escape from the ugly real-life times.
However, I hate camping, the only reason I carry a tent is so I can enjoy another day exploring the outdoors without having to return home.
So basically it’s childhood formation:
What the hell is after that hill?
What’s over that mountain?
How deep is that forest?
Hmm, there’s a cave, I wonder what’s inside (typical white people dumb curiosity I can relate to).
Gives a feeling that’s still stuff left unexplored (false).
Grown up now and with all the commodities (basic mandatory needs) and plenty of other useless stuff, being outdoors reconnects me with that sense of freedom I lost but I can relive it from time to time.
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Kids, I live in a camper, kinda, trailer park is the bomb, and I am your capt. Careful youngings, the beatin least still in the works, you will catch a beating.
I woke up in a pile of puke, in a public park across from the trailer park, I also lost control of my body functions while I was there, yes defacation, yes urine. I went home an passed out in my trailer. My daughter cums home and shouts what is this. I say I had a few to many and shit myself it happens. I know that, she says, but look at your cock, what happened to it? I didn’t know my cock was out, I looked down and it looked all chewed up, had some puke on it. My daughter got a rag and began cleaning the cock like only she can. Once the puke was off and we could see it, she thinks a squirrel may have bitten and clawed at my cock while I was passed out. watch out when going into the wild. I will give you and update on the condition my condition is in when I am better. Thanks for all your support, and we may set up a go fund me page, so you can send me your money, then as the cock heals I will use your money for more booze, smokes, and hookers, thanks. Tim
Cock update. My daughter didn’t like the look of cock, so she took me to the doctor. The doctor turns out to be an old=timer, and is annoyed that I had my daughter examine my cock. However she was right he says, your penis is infected! So they take me in, hook me up with all kinds of stuff to battle the infected penis. I ask the doc why would squirrels attack my cock? The penis was in the way he says, the squirrels were trying to get your NUTS! Makes sense. Well I am in the hospital, the bill will be huge, so my daughter is setting up the gofund me page. All kidding aside, I need your help. Thank you in advance.
Home from the Hospital. Tough week for your Captain. I am suing the hospital of course. The Quake thought I had the covid, and intabated me. My duaghter cums to visti see me in the icu, and flips out. Did you do a covid test she ask. Well no answers the Quake, it was his breathing, he was having great diffucultys. My daughter tells him thats the way he brreaths, 5 packs of marlboros a day for over 50 years! Turns she was right after a negative covid test. So I got me one them good lawyers that advertise on the Jerry Springer show. My lawer says will kill them.
I also told him, when I was in, I acted like I was sleeping, to hear what the nurses and quake was saying about me. The Doc told the nurse he stinks so bad the bricks in the building are chocking, you need to bath him. Well she happened to be a soul sister. I aint no slave, I aint washes his stink ass. Really nice. Well the quake responds, have Maria the nurse assistant do it. Yes have the latina do the dirty work, typical white privalage response. Maria did a great job and will not be in the lawsuit. My cock is on the mend. I ask Maria to visit me in the trailer park, she said no English butt I think she will cum bye. Law suits take awhile, so I still do need your help, please send me whatefer you kan. Thanks my friends, when the lawsuit cums through, we will have the mother of all bashes at Mels trailer park, where the freeways meet.
Dear reader, Many of you asked for a picture of my injured body part. Well how to show the world? Social media will not allow such a graphic image. Well as always my darling daughter had the answer. She said you can post a picture of your cock on my paid up fans only page. I said what is that? That is where I post porn, having sex with my clients, and we will make lots of money. So I posted the real selfie, as we called it. What happens, paid up fans only is doing away with all porn, and sexual images, almost as soon as I posted it. Cant handle the Captains handle, paid up clowns? So once again I am stuck, no incum, and huge bills, please send me some of your fiat currency via the go
fund me page, I really need your help. Tough times, for a tough guy, I will make it! Mel’s Trailer Park is a really good dealo!
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ORGY pm at Mels fab trailer park, mother of all orgies. Yup been a tough coouple years for all of us, we need an orgy, I will host at the sexy trailer park, futher details to cum, jack off for now. I am your imbecile
More answers to incuming questions. Will there be security? Please, do you kids know of anyone tougher than me? I am all you need! Condoms are optional, not required, i care less for them. Butt bring them if you need them, same with vigara. All drugs are allowed at Mels trailer park, from meth and crack, to your heroin and weed, plenty of booze.
Filming? Yes there will be a room for filming immoral acts and one more private no filming, invitation only, for more depraved acts.
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Ranger Andrea Lankford is a joke liar and egotistical ass
Has this ever happened to you? Yesterday morning as I was getting ready for work, almost out the door and I feel a shit cumming on, no I am wrong its just a fart, boom. I walk out the door and as I am walking I feel wet in my whites, my undies. Maybe there was just a little shit in there. Hop in my jeep liberty, light up a smoke a drive to work, about 20 minutes, park it. Start to walk in and I could feel shit all on my backside. Get inside and I could smell myself, reek of shit, hmm, I wonder could the others smell me? Go in the men’s room it was a full on shit, yup I shit myself, clean up the best I could. On with the day, welcume to my world, ah fuck you all, did you morons have on your mask? Well I hope I made you sick with my smell of shit…………….
Why are you stereo typing all white people? Whether we like or love camping or fishing is every persons choice. Which ever color or race they may be! Camping is not only a white only activity! When I was in the scouts we had several races and yes this included, blacks or African-Americans, we camped in tents on the ground using sleeping bags! No one , I replete no one complained, because we all worked to get her and had fun! Occasionally we camped in cabins we were not separated by race or anything we were mixed together. We all became closer. I even went to Philmont scout camp in New Mexico. Guess what? The group was mixed together and hiked 120 miles as the crow flies over 12 days. Everyone had good and tough days, but we encouraged each other and had fun each night! No one complained or said this was a white activity! It was a human activity!
are we trailer parkers campers? Hmm, deep thoughts from your moron.
The backpack must be comfortable and adapt perfectly to the body without causing discomfort or chafing.
TAMPON SHORTAGE, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING JOEY BABY?
Yes I have been asked to address this issue. Well I asked the smartest guy I know, not Hunts, butt my pop, he came up with the answer for all us ho’s
He said here and tossed me a pair of his all day every day depends! Yes they were used, however I went to Walmarts and got me some depends for that time of the month, may I suggest to the suggestable whore, you do the same.