As mentioned earlier, white people love to be outside. But not everyone knows that another thing they like to do is make people feel bad for wanting to watch sports on TV or play videogames. While it would be easy to get angry at white people for this, remember it is hard wired in their head that the greatest thing a person can do in their free time is to hike/walk/bike outdoors.
Usually, they will see that you are preparing to enjoy your life and they will say “hey, lets go for a hike in the park,” and most people will say “hey, thanks but I’ve been working all week and I’m really excited about watching this game,” and then they will respond “don’t be a lump on the couch, you’re wasting your life away, etc…” If you ignore them, they will eventually go away.
And much like most things with white people – they win both ways. If you decide to go with them, they feel good about getting someone off the couch and “into the fresh air,” and if you don’t decide to go, they can spend their entire time outdoors saying “boy, this is great, X doesn’t know what he/she is missing!” and running on a mix of self-satisfaction, Odwalla juice and muesli.
Stuff White People Like 
i am a white person who pretends to love the outdoors. but secretly I hate them.
OMFG I was married to one of those. It’s why I divorced him. Oh yes dear, let’s make our precious free time together a group activity with your wanker friends and glory in as much fear and physical labour as possible.
So many of these apply to a coworker I know. She claims she left her ex because he didn’t want to do crap like hiking. Who can blame him? Now she hikes alone. Lone female (white) hikers are usually heard about on the news “the body of a young caucasian woman was found yesterday…”.
I’ve found that a good response to anyone who ever says “don’t be a lump on the couch, you’re wasting your life away, etc…” is something like “Hey, granola bar, go f**k your mother!” They usually run away and cry because most white people can’t handle it when others are mean to them.
this is so true. As a white man i cant sit inside for too long, i will go crazy.
White people rave about the great outdoors and romaticize city life (they hate the suburbs, even though 99% of them grew up there), but they never see any contradiction there.
i’m one of those white people who would become a great outdoorsman like john muir if only i had someone to drag me to such places. actually, i guess i rarely go outside.
One mustn’t forget the love of going outside in shorts/short sleeves when it is freezing out. Or running or jogging in the rain! LOL
LOL@ Muke
So many of these apply to a coworker I know. She claims she left her ex because he didn’t want to do crap like hiking. Who can blame him? Now she hikes alone. Lone female (white) hikers are usually heard about on the news “the body of a young caucasian woman was found yesterday…”.
@Corey, so THAT’S why whiteys like to jog outside regardless of the weather. It’s a compulsion!
Screw that. I’m a white male (I’m a blonde haired, blue eyed, pallor mother fucker,) and I cannot stand the outdoors. I’d rather play video games than go sweat my ass off hiking or doing other shit outdoors. My girlfriend is all into being outside…Praise Odin she has friends she can do that with while I sit in my air conditioning and mock the fools stupid enough to go hiking.
I also live in Boulder, CO, so imagine my suffering. God damn hippies.
stuffblackpeoplelike – eating watermelon! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – pumping oil! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – gang warfare! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – eating beans! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – shooting heroin! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – welfare! hahaha!!!
stuffjewishpeoplelike – keeping money! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – eating rice! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – kissing goats! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – sniffing glue! hahaha!!!
aren’t i funny and clever!!!
don’t you dare call me a racist!!!
Spot on, especially the part about making u feel like shit.
I’m white and I don’t care whether people go outside or inside. Sometimes I like being outside and sometimes I like being inside. Let me know!
Hey Illuminator, as your girlfriend, I’d just like to say that you just called me a fool…you’re not getting laid for a while. Have a nice day. :)~
I love stereotypes because they’re true. Please you lazy pieces get off of the couch and do something with your life. TV is worthless.
So, no self-respecting white person would drink an Odwalla juice since that is made by Coca-Cola and we all know how they abuse union organizers in Colombia.
I hate when people believe that standing outside doing nothing > sitting inside doing nothing. At least when I’m inside, I’m already home, and I don’t have to smell any pollution or hippies.
White girl here. I love staying at home, always have. Appreciate the outdoors, blah blah, but there’s nothing quite like lounging about the house doing nothing. No guilt, thank you very much!
I’m not a hardcore outdoorsy gal, but the occasional hike, white water rafting, or snowboarding is fun 🙂 I like a healthy balance of both indoors and outdoors. On a glorious day, who wouldn’t want to be outside? BUT, currently living in India, the air quality is so bad, I’m forced to stay the majority of my time indoors 😦
I like being outside, but what blows me away is how hiking requires all this specialized gear, like one of those expensive “Nalgene bottles.” White people are always talking about their “Nalgene’s” and how they won’t break, even if they’re dropped from the top of a rock wall or something (white people love rock climbing!). The thing is, these bottles are too bulky to fit in any kind of pocket, and usually have to be awkwardly hung from a “caribbeaner,” a rock climbing accessory that is also used by lots of white people who don’t do rock climbing. My mom needs special socks that wipe the sweat away from her feet when she’s hiking.
@ # 19…must be fine and dandy being indoors with the rest of the Indian people.
lololololol…at anonymous #1. I live in Boston and I sometimes see people running in the rain, under zero weather and other extreme conditions. Why would you do that when there are gyms everywhere? Probably preparing for the Boston marathon…lol
guilty as charged…
ah, you forgot redheads. Those folks too white to go outside most of the year, otherwise they’ll burn to a crisp.
fuck, I’m not even a redhead, but my father is and I seem to have inherited the propensity to burn in moments anyway.
Hmm, I agree with this… but there’s another type of white people and I think it’s important to say this too. There’s those white people glorify the outdoors and the act of exercising and crap like that, but since we’re too lazy to actually to do this stuff, they’l say things like, “Oh, I’ll do it tomorrow!” etc.
Same goes with food. They glorify healthy food so much (Look at all those tests and studies they do on food!), so when they eat something healthy they’re all like, “Oh, I was good today, I ate some fruit! Let’s have McDonalds for dinner. :D” Maybe that’s just white Americans though.
Keep up the blog, it’s hilarious! I’m white, and even though according to your blog I’m failing as a white person, I know a lot of people who act just like this stuff. Maybe saying this makes me whiter. XD
Ding ding ding ding….you finally got me! I LOVE the outdoors and I am constantly telling him that he’s wasting a beautiful day by not going outside! lol But hell, we live in Chicago…you don’ t get many beautiful days.
And…for the record, I buy nice accessories for my bike and I do ride it to work (16 m round-trip) so ha!
I thought something was wrong with me and wondered where in the world this pressure came from to hike and go outside. I have no interest in it and ever since attending university (and all the years since then) people have acted like it’s such a big deal.
I’m so glad to at least see in print that there are people who don’t think they “should” be outside walking on trails to enjoy their spare time.
this is indeed true, i had many a white roomate, and often through my college days id like to take some time and enjoy a good game, when i played games alone, they would say the exact same stuff, you are wasting your life away, you can be outside kayaking right now!
yea..ill pass, thanks, now do you want to close my door and leave me alone.
then they would come back, and be like man, you really missed out! guess you will just have to join us next time…
hmm..yea ok..whatever thats what i say.
White people love camping… almost all of my white friends (bless them) have a lifetime membership to R.E.I.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. This is the best blog of all time. Fuckin’ new age yuppie fucktards. And to everyone hating on this blog, remove stick from your ass immediately.
#3 Muke
“Lone female (white) hikers are usually heard about on the news ‘the body of a young caucasian woman was found yesterday…’ ”
Actually, it usually starts with “Susie-Lynn Brianna Smith was last seen hiking in Really-Remote State Park…”
[…] of my British friends, contemporaries and colleagues and, while not all of the items are relevant (going out instead of playing videogames?!) enough of them are applicable enough to make for uncomfortable, if humourous, […]
great blog – but weak point; you’re missing a huge stereotypical demographic: gamers. white males are the driving force behind the booming gaming industry.
Dammmit!
My friend is Mexican and he likes everything on this blog!
Whats up with that??
what the hell man i am white as all get out and i do not enjoy the outdoors particularly except on those occasions when my fellow man terrifies me enough that i flee into the wilderness to seek solitude, and even on such an occasion a deserted building or perhaps a rooftop would be adequate
“…and running on a mix of self-satisfaction, Odwalla juice and muesli.”
ROFL! Don’t forget Clif bars. (NEVER Power Bars)
Muke (#3): What’s her name? Is she single??
You forgot to mention that despite the fact that white people love being outdoors, they somehow always forget sunscreen. Therefore, intense sunburn is a badge of honor and it’s even better if they have ridiculous tan lines from goggle/sunglasse.
This is particularly true for Canadians in the summertime. I feel guilty if I stay inside on a nice summer’s day when I know it won’t last for long. We have no problem staying inside during winter but will often go out for walks in weather that would kill people in most countries. We feel it makes us superior that we can run around in -40 weather and not die.
Let’s go outside and cook over an open flame or gas stove and spend time hiking to gather wood and sleep on the ground and generally make it hard to be comfortable, but it doesn’t matter because we’re outside, right?
My parents moved here so they wouldn’t have to do all that.
Blanco Guy,
“Dammmit!
My friend is Mexican and he likes everything on this blog!
Whats up with that??”
One word: Coconut.
“And much like most things with white people — they win both ways.”
It’s funny ’cause it’s true!
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside: “And much like most things with white people – they win both ways. If you decide to go with them, they feel good about getting someone off the couch and “into the fresh air,” and if you don’t decide to go, they can spend their entire time outdoors saying “boy, this is great, X doesn’t know what he/she is missing!” and running on a mix of self-satisfaction, Odwalla juice and muesli.” […]
I’m an outdoor loving white man, but I don’t like to push it on other people. My fellow tribesmen of fair complexion are likely to slow me down or drag my spirit down with their complaints. Furthermore, white folks are awkwardly built, unsightly forest ornaments. I’d rather not see them out there on the trail.
You writers are from Vancouver, yes? This is particularily true in super, natural British Columbia, more so than other Canadian provinces in my experience. The Vancouver weekend warrior with the turbo expeneive bicycle mentioned in a later post has a certain fanaticism for the outdoors unparalleled in say, Ontario. They seem more inclined to drive to their lakeside cottages in the Muskoka and spend the weekend leisurely boating.
100% true. I have friends like this! And they always give me a bad feeling. The feeling wasting my life on the couch.
It is even worse if you are single. Everyone expects you to be active 24 h every single day of the week. Because there is nothing else in a singles life (no work, no household, no things to arrange, no tiredness/laziness). Only going out, meeting friends, being active if possible OUTSIDE (and secretly on the search for mr/mrs right).
if you are relaxing on your couch after a hard day at work (I do work ;)) they look at you as if you are sick oder insane. and they want to call the ambulance if you stay at home for one weekend because you are exhausted.
It is terrible! I like to be outside but I want to decide when and what to do!
Sandy
I think that most of that is true. If you are young, but old enough to have fun, people expect you to be hyper-active and out there. Not sitting at home waiting for something to find you. People will often tell you what are you doing and why you don’t have fun and just spend your life having fun. I think that people are expectant of one depending of the personality and that is often not true. There will be times where you just want to spend time by yourself and people shouldn’t really bother you about it. Why not tell them to be in your shoes. They’d want to spend time with themselves for a while.
Married to one of these and we have finally reached a daily balance – he can go hike in the woods, but leave me alone, I’m staying here, where I have immediate access to refrigerated pomegranate juice, computer and pile of tabloid magazines. Unfortunately this does not apply to vacation planning. The perfect vacation for my husband would be hiking in the mountains (fully equipped for white man tribal combat) while tracking animal footprints and informing all those around him what kind of animal they are from and why the second print is closer to the third foot because the animal has recently been injured. (Probably hit by SUV on nearby interstate highway.) By the way honey, if you are reading this, I love you very much and am only kidding, sorta.
Related to the whole “being outside” thing, in my lifetime of experience with white people, I’ve come to learn that they also love being barefoot outside. I have seen white people without shoes or socks, frolicking in the rain, sunshine, and snow. They’ve exposed their feet in the fields of the country (specifically North Carolina), and in the streets of the inner city. I mean, literally, the streets! There’s nothing more perplexing than seeing a white person (more than likely a guy, sober or drunk) walking barefoot in the middle of the street with broken glass, random garbage, and pure grime all over the place.
I need someone to explain this desire to “free” the toes in the most inappropriate places…
Man, the word “muesli” says it all. I had to actually go and find out what that stuff was cuz I’m not white!
Well…..I sorta agree with this. However in the south if there is a big game on then NO ONE goes out…..until half-time and then we toss around a football in the yard until the game starts again.
I fucking hate camping! My dad would take us camping at the lamest park, Kerrville State Park, that had screened in shacks with privacy slatting on one end and a bare light bulb, toilets yards away down a stony path and always full of drowning scorpions. His solution to us being fearful of getting stung on the vagina by a poisonous, angry, arachnid was, “Find one where the scorpion isn’t moving. I should be safe then.” Stupid hikes in 98 degree weather in 100% humidity SUCK BALLS. We always wanted to go to the GOOD camping place, Bastrop State Park, which had cabins with air conditioning, full kitchens, indoor plumbing, beds, and came with a free cable hook up…
(Yeah, we’re from Texas)
I think outdoor activities have changed into some kind of new bizarre religion, fueled on fair trade soy based beverages and adreneline. I live in Calgary right now, the whitest city on earth, and somehow people don’t understand why don’t want to spend my weekends engaged in the newest ridiculous frankestein monster of an extreme sport, like that tosser I saw on TV who was kayaking down a ski hill.
My husband (who is white) is always nagging me to go outside more. I (who am black) just ignore him till he goes away about half the time. The other half I go along (unless it too hot or cold!). Then we argue about the temperature!
right on this is so true it isn’t even funny!!!
I don’t think most of these have to do w/ “white” it sounds more like “you know your a hipster” or “you know you’re from the West Coast”…
this one specifically – I know way to many lazy ass white people who I can’t pry from their video games and sunday sports
Word! The “get outside” directive is also VERY Minnesotan, or at least upper midwest. I am still unable to sit inside on nice days (and in NorCal there are a lot of them!) thanks to the constant message from my parents to “get outside and play, the weather’s nice!” And by nice, of course, that means there is a windchill above 0 and/or the mosquitoes are busy feeding on the neighbor kid.
Some might say “How or why did white people end up liking all the things on this list?”
If you analyze it, it all stems from one place:
– White people simply have too much money.
What does that do? When all your basic needs are met, food, shelter, long term security, health, etc., you sort of need to create new goals for yourself or “better” yourself as a person. That’s where most of the items on the list stem from.
“Nonwhite” folks are too busy, you know, getting real jobs, having to pay rent or a mortgage, struggling to actually provide a good life, working real hours….they don’t have to time or energy to devote to these “white” cultural causes.
I could be wrong, but that’s my take on it.
#58
right on.
so that brings me to a question,
if most black ppl had good money would they be doin most of the things on this list?
hmmm….
I enjoy the outdoors. I enjoy looking at them from the air-conditioned confines of a well-appointed bar.
well… i happen to have grown up in the wrong side of town and had a great back yard. i still love being outdoors (and when did we stop calling it “outside”?)
the bad thing about going “outdoors” now is that you’re expected to spend a lot of frigging cash on north face, blah blah… and have “gear” for doing just about everything enjoyable in itself. walking? yep. running? gear. biking? better be a corporate atty so you can pay for your “free” time “outdoors”… screw that. i’ll just put on my sweats and t-shirt and hit the park trail.
[…] Are you still here? Well, you can also go browse all my Friday Martini Time posts…or check out my guest post over at Lip-Sticking: Marketing to Us Bag Ladies. Now, really GO! . . . STILL Here? Read What White People Like: #9, Making You Feel Bad About Not Going Outside […]
I am black, but I love everything on this blog too. I’m so granola my name should be Kashi. LOL.
THE OUTDOORS ARE GREAT!!!!!! ANYONE WHO SAYS ANYTHING ELSE IS AN IDIOT!!!!!! YOU ALL LOOK THE SAME!!!!
This happened to me today. A real white person did this to me…TODAY.
Proudly, I’m inside, watching the SHIT out of the Kansas vs. Texas A&M game.
My entire family is like this. They make me feel like some sort of vampire.
I love the great indoors.
We had a big snowfall here, and every time there’s a snowfall, the TV or newspaper interviews that White Guy out on cross-country skis, who always says “It’s the only way to get around!” These people annoy me, but are generally harmless.
These are hilarious. And this particularly applies to me – I go crazy if I’m indoors for too long. I love the ourdoors. But what about the gym rats? There are plenty of white gym rats. Anyway, love the post. And while it’s implied that nothing you write is about, say, poor white trash, after reading some comments I’ve realized some people don’t understand that. Satire isn’t for everyone, what can I say?
This list seems more like its all stuff that other races specifically don’t like…thats kinda garbage
http://www.garbarrassing.com
for funny stuff that everyone likes…
Well I understand your idea of not leaving your house, unless your going grab a 40, or some newports from the corner store, but we live in neighborhoods where kids can play on the street, so to stay inside with TV/Video Games it is bad, because you have to enjoy that safe environment while it lasts, before miniorities move in and start killing each other
“running on a mix of self-satisfaction, Odwalla juice and muesli”
HILARIOUS
The funny thing is, my bf and I are both mixed (he’s white/black, I’m white/Latina) and we each like approximately half of the things white people like on this list. lol
John: minorities don’t kill each other. They kill white people, so watch out! They’re gonna get you.
P.S. — see you at the Klan rally.
I work in video games and stay indoors alot. Does that make me non-white?
that, perhaps, is another factor contributing
to an increasing fatality rates due to indoor-induced stress
of whites in Korea and Japan….
>.< lol jk
the whole outdoors thing is indeed promanent…
cause here, you’ve got land to go out on…
I have a white-washed Asian friend who is the embodiment of this entry. He verbally makes everyone feel bad for sitting around, or eating “bad” foods at a restaurant. Every lunch, he eats a salad with NO salad dressing, and drinks only water. I hope he dies earlier than I do.
Fuck the outdoors. I say pave it over already. I’ve got allergies.
Wow. This is EXACTLY why I had to break up with my otherwise great white boyfriend…he wanted to LIVE OUTSIDE & hike every damn weekend with his damn healthy homemade snacks packed up neatly for the trip. The bastard didn’t even use A/C during the summer.
It was torture & made me swear off hikers for life…which essentially means I no longer date white men. They all hike, kayak, rollerblade, bike, or…oh, you get the idea.
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
i call it “cultural violenece” when white people try and force me outside. fuck that.
I think these are VANCOUVER white people characteristics, perhaps?? I lived in Vancouver for 3 years and it was one of the dreariest spells of my life. But in Montreal people go out, they stay in, they don’t give a shite. There’s a nice healthy balance here. I think it’s in Vancouver where people even given themselves permission to get on someone else’s case like that. Also, about standing still at concerts. Another Vancouver thing. I left and i’m not looking back!
I liked the post, I would definitely say that I am one of those outdoorsy people who definitely tries to make other people feel bad about sitting on their ass and confiding in a non-relational object as their past time. I don’t care at all if you don’t want to experience nature’s medicinal soothing on your soul. The experience is usually a great deal more enjoyable for me if there are less people out there. I am sorry that you have become so disconnected with the natural world that it angers you to think about going out there, heaven forbid someone invite you or even try to convince you that it’s good.
What does this have to do with white or black people? that is pure ignorance and you really need to put life into a new perspective. This issue has nothing to do with race, get over it. I’m black and I love the outdoors and I do try to share that with my friends.
Hey clander, pay attention to post #20 on this one. That’s how you make an observation funny.
This is so not true. I never guilt anyone into being outdoorsy and frankly, this whole blog is getting a bit old…now, why don’t you all get off ur fricken’ computers and get out and enjoy some of this nice weather before you get any damn fatter.
You should just rename the blog “Odd Obsessions”. That way you could avoid the negative replies like, “I’m white and I don’t like that”. These subjects have the potential to be funnier. Then again, you already have a loyal audience of people who think these observations are “so true”.
To experience the planet we all evolved from in what is left of its former state is infinitely more liberating than vegetating on a couch and being trained to buy things. The atomization and dehumanization of staying within isolated cells are a fairly recent occurrence for our species, which explains obesity and the overall death of people’s appreciation of life’s unlikely, delicate existence. How useful we are to the rulers when we would prefer to be passive and disconnected from one another when not selling our lives into wage slavery and participating in the ruination of the system that sustains life.
“Usually, they will see that you are preparing to enjoy your life….”
That’s one of the best lines on this site.
I love this blog…I have been immersed in white culture my entire life. I went to schools that were 95% white until the age of 13 (at which time I moved to Atlanta and experienced the worst case of culture shock and trauma in human history). I have lived in Atlanta for 16 years now and all of my Black friends call me “White Girl”, “Blonde”, or “Suzy Wonton” (which is more about my slanted eyes than me being white).
Anywho, I can relate to this entire list and weirdly it all rings true to me…
I hate when people don’t go outside…get some fresh air, smell a damn flower, look at some nature blow in the breeze, watch the birds mate, do something! Feeling fat? Hop your ass on a bike and pedal until you’re gasping for air (do this for about 6 weeks and the pounds will melt off without you even noticing). Walk somewhere, run somewhere, hike up something…I promise if you leave the T.V. off for a month or two, not much is gonna have changed when you cut it back on…different day, same bullshit!
Minnie Driver was on “The View” once, and they asked her what her workout routine was like…she said, “I dunno…eat less, move more.”
I honestly believe that people would be less crabby, and have more esteem if they went beyond their four drab walls, and the Zombie box and WENT OUTSIDE!!
The Google ad that’s served at the moment reads, “Bang Married White Women” LOL
I love being outside, and I wish people would understand that when I CHOOSE to do something inside instead. I happen to like both the indoors and the outdoors. Geez, nothing wrong with that.
I was skeptical after I read the “only white people love weed” thing, but this one is SO TRUE. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Remember kids, doing yardwork is not just recreationally superior to playing video games or watching TV — it’s also MORALLY superior.
Work outside for 35 years, hanging iron and building smokestacks in all kinds of weather, THEN tell me I need to get outside. Christ, many days I couldn’t wait to get inside.
This describes basically the white population of my entire medical school class. They feel sorry for you if you don’t include running, kicking, or climbing in discusses your weekend activities. Disgust palpable. I’m less than 120lbs but they always make me feel fat and ugly with their pity and disgust.
I think white people made sure the market model for outdoor gear was high-end to preserve a white-only atmosphere, the last vestige of a country club
Some might say “How or why did white people end up liking all the things on this list?”
If you analyze it, it all stems from one place:
– White people simply have too much money.
What does that do? When all your basic needs are met, food, shelter, long term security, health, etc., you sort of need to create new goals for yourself or “better” yourself as a person. That’s where most of the items on the list stem from.
“Nonwhite” folks are too busy, you know, getting real jobs, having to pay rent or a mortgage, struggling to actually provide a good life, working real hours….they don’t have to time or energy to devote to these “white” cultural causes.
I could be wrong, but that’s my take on it.
AGREEED!!
Seriously, think about the social value of outdoor activities vs. watching TV or playing video games. How often to you go into the office and say, “I had the greatest hike this weekend…” It’s actually pretty common to hear that, and while white people will think, “oh, that’s impressive and makes me feel inadequate,” there’s much more value in discussing a basketball gave (for example) that everyone watched. If you go on hikes all the time you’re “the hike guy” and everyone thinks you’re douchy and only talk about hikes.
Watch some TV once in a while, being outside alone is just like being indoors alone–only with trees. If you’re with someone else then you have exactly X (number of people you went with) to discuss that great hike, and even those people think you’re lame.
This is a very blue state whitey column. You can pretty much tell the socioeconomic status of any whitey based on whether or not their outdoor pursuits involve a motor. For example, the “white people” referenced in this blog would cross-country ski in the very same wilderness where other white people partake in snowmobiling. Bicycling/Riding motorcycles. Hiking/ATV’ing. It’s the same divide.
Oh yeah, and I’m a total pretentious NPR whitey who loves cycling, but can’t help but recognize its preposturousness. Keep the blogs coming!
I like staying inside on sunny days cause I’m so white I get sunburned too easily and the sun hurts my eyes….I’m almost an albino!!!!and I get harassed about it by other white people….they say “how can you be inside on a day like this???!!!
I am a white guy. I must go outside as much as possible every day or I will die. It is a deep urge, there is no way around it.
I love to spend time doing outdoor things as well as indoor activities; just depends on the mood. What I don’t get is how people say they are going to do “outdoor” activities, but they don’t really do them. They go hiking by taking a walk in the park, or they go camping by sleeping in an RV.
That’s about the same as playing basketball by shooting some free throws on an empty court. It’s not even close to the real thing.
Oh, pay no heed to this “outside ” thing. It’s all a big scam to hide that we’re exercising. You know, cause getting like too fat, is like one of the worst things to happen to us. Don’t you get it half the “stuff” we do is really about something else?
Or am i just messing with you and we really are tree hugging outside-loving nomads? You’re just jealous because you don’t get the “communion with nature” thing. You’re either born with it or not, and you don’t find a lot of nonwhite hikers and nature photographers. You NEVER see non whites out in bad weather, reveling in the fog-laced hillsides. Nope. Doesn’t happen. I feel bad for you people, really. How can we put all out energy into Tibet and Darfur and Mumia , when there’s people out there who don’t enjoy walking for miles in the rain on the beach. I’m talking social justice here.
NO INSIDE UNWHITE PERSON LEFT BEHIND!
(it’s a threat! get out there! )
SC
White Coaching, Assimilation Intl.
actually as a true lover of the outdoors i never invite other people along with me, why would i want to fuck up a perfectly good time outside and ALONE by dragging some one else along with me.
So i would say your right on, any one who bugs you to go out side with them if just trying to lay a guilt trip on, FU+K them
Humans like to think they are so different just because their color.
Only shallow humans actually believe this.
And the sad humans validate the stereotypes.
on and on and on. . .
this is so true!!! i am a white chick and my boyfriend is latino–he parks his ass on the couch and i am always yelling that he is wasting his life and that we should go hiking!!
I hate the outdoors.
I’m certain no list of this type is complete with out including: “under dressing for cold weather–as in eschewing socks with any type of shoe wear,. esp. men’s dress shoes.”
Also referencing the “gifted children” entries–certainly there is great fondness for loudly proclaiming how infrequently they bathe their children–demanding (and assuming) that we so relish their moldy spawn–that we should worship them in their filthiness, as well.
And. don’t forget YARD SALES. White people must stop and haggle in front of million dollar mid-sized cottages in my neighborhood. No higher honor than to have bought your next block neighbor’s supply of cast off Talbot’s, still encrusted with some of junior’s precious filth. You are really regarded as weak if cannot embrace your fellow white person’s body dirt. We are talking about the dirt of white people, here, people.
Oh, and don’t forget, calling people-“people”, as in “people, we all need to take a deep breath, ok?”
Does this mean by being the computer right now I’m not acting white?
this is so true, as a non white person, i have had to endure many a week-end of the white people nagging me to go outside to see the sunset, take a hike, enjoy nature , blah , blah, blah. Look i love nature as much as the next guy but it’s the attitude that kills me. Sometimes a girl just wants to veg out on the couch watching the Rock of Love marathon. Is that so wrong, white people?
I am white and i spend most of my time watching t.v. and playing videogames….. this stereotype mainly applys to hippies in general….. by the way that “hey granola bar… go fuck your mom” insult was a good one
Dammmit!
My friend is Mexican and he likes everything on this blog!
Whats up with that??
Dale, is that you!!
Haha, the line
“they will see that you are preparing to enjoy your life and they will say ..”
is hilarious!
More grownup whiteys have the option of doing outdoors stuff or not, but what about the kids?
I grew up when children could run, bike, explore much more than now. We had monkey bars with cement foundations and a dark polished look on them that you could lose your grip and slip off of; stranger danger was taught but we didn’t scare the kids into assuming that a molester was literally behind every bush; we reckelessly raced our bikes through traffic without a plastic helmet on our heads.
I understand that there are dangers in this world but it’s gotten to the point where are kids have become pasty, obese, sheltered little hothouse flowers who can’t handle the slightest physical inconvenience and threat.
[…] microbrews from the gazillion small local craft brewers, hydrate with expensive water bottles, and make people feel bad about not being outside. In the summer, they enjoy riding bicycles and running marathons and drinking coffee. […]
White people are so self-loathing…Always talking about Native Americans as “respecting” nature and how the white devil destroyed it and countless other reasons why white people are BAD. Why are we whites so low on self-esteem!?
yeah, the only time i ever liked really being outside was in high school but at that time mushrooms were involved a lot and i realized that there was more to look at outside than in my friend’s rooms.
Ugh…I hate nature. There’s bugs and sunburns and wet socks….just altogether unpleasant.
I have to reiterate that white people love rock climbing! Absolutely, positively, leave school, be ‘dirt poor’ (although somehow they are driving a Subaru or 2005 Toyota Tacoma), live life on the road love rock climbing.
I am a rock climber, and I am also a field biologist. So, I work outside many days of the year, and when I’m not working, I can often be found rock climbing (or sea kayaking, or dog walking).
Oh jeeze i don’t even pretend. I LOVE TV, THERE I SAID IT, I LOVE TV, I LOVE TV, I LOVE TV
AND MY THIGHS ARE TO BIG FOR THOSE BIKES SHORTS, AND MY BUM IS TO HUGE, FOR RIDING A BIKE. ALL THAT ASS HANGING OVER THE SEAT.
AND HIKING IS JUST JUST JUST STUPID.
AND THEY DON’T MAKE OUTDOOR SPORTS WEAR PANTS LONG ENOUGH, I’M A TALL, BIG THIGHED BIG ASSED GIRL
DAMIT
I HATE THE OUTDOORS,
OR DO I JUST HATE MY BIG ASS AND BIG THIGHS,
NO, IT GOES BACK TO THE OUTDOOR WEAR. THERE IT IS, IT IS ALL BECAUSE OF THE OUTDOOR WEAR, THAT WHITE PEOPLE LOVE, WHICH ALSO A TOPIC ON THE LIST. SO I BLAME MY BIG ASS AND MY BIG THIGHS ON THE WHITE PEOPLE OUTDOOR WEAR, NOT LONG ENOUGH.
OK GOT TO GO WATCH TV NOW , HAVE A GREAT DAY, OUTSIDE
But doesn’t the smell of curry,and b. o. get you sick,
Jeeze why do they all have b.o. and smell like curry, we are in the new malenium, haven’t they bloody heard of DEODARANT!!!!!!!!! DEODARANT!!!!!!!!!!!
Put some on!!!
And here in America, there are stores EVERYWHERE, with DEODARANT,
Hey Indian people from India, buy some DEODARANT!!!!!
I have no other issues, with the Indian people other than they stink, other than that you are all ok.
Thank you for letting me vent about B.O
[…] being outdoors […]
I’m so white that I live in an urban area and insist on walking to and from the store on Friday night to get my beer for the weekend though (or around, depending on the weather) a patch of local woods. Not the groceries, just the beer. That way I can cut through the woods on my way back and drink beer while outdoors and exercising, which is of course better for you and more enjoyable than just sitting around inside one’s house drinking beer in the comforts of one’s own home. By doing so I am both simulating exercise, getting fresh air (though I also smoke, so much of the fresh air is mixed with tobacco and marijuana fumes), and can later talk to other white people about how I cut through the woods listening to music on my ipod and drinking beer while they just sat around being lumps watching TV, playing video games, listening to music, or just being safe inside of their homes. I am making life into a game and look forward to playing it again on Friday night, and will make sure that my performance wear clothing and Apple ipod are clean, charged up and read to go into the great outdoors. To get drunk!
hahaha, you’re awesome dude
my ex-boyfriend would wake me from a nap after a long run (marathon training), and say “let’s go do something! it’s beautiful out! we must not waste the day!” to which i replied, “but i was doing ‘something’ – i was napping.” yeah, he’s an ex.
I got a kick out of this, because I do that. “You mean you really don’t feel like you wasted a day of your life sitting at home watching TV instead of getting outside and engaging life? Each to his own, and all, but I really don’t get it. How satisfying can that really be? I mean, why watch fake people’s fake lives on a fake TV show instead of experiencing your own real life, instead?”
Hey you, learn to spell DEODORANT!!!
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
this is true but i mainly say this to fat people
good question.
Whites are the “nature” people. We’ve sailed the oceans, trekked to the poles, climbed all the mountains, became the best farmers, excel at all outdoor sports, hell we even went to the moon!!
Contrast that to the “indians” or the least natural of all the blacks and mexicans that sit on their fat asses for centuries on end.
eehh , thats not the point of my blog. sorry some white people don’t know how to spell deodorant, but we know how to wear it. My arm pits smell like a spring shower. And Indians don’t.
Not that I have anything against Indian People once again, just buy and wear deodorant,
Take care and have a great day.
Well good for you honey. You win the prize.!!!
There is no prize…… really
I hate camping, all them bugs
I really am white
just hate bugs
You go girl, stand up and be proud, or lay down and be proud!!!
I am white , what the heck is it, and juice everyone is talking about
My Mum used to say, go outside and blow the stink off, in the winter. brrrrr
you scary vampire you………
aaahhhhhhh there is that juice again what the heck is it,
this white person, does not know any thing about this juice, or the bars…………..maybe i’m really not white, all the other white people know what it is.
i’m so scared
eehh go take a pill
OH GO TAKE A CHILL PILL, and get a sense of humor, it is supposed to be SILLY
GO OUT SIDE AND COOL OFF.
GO OUT SIDE AND LEAVE US ALONE
contradiction? where?
cities have higher population density, and leave more room for the great outdoors.
suburbs takes up a lot more room. it ain’t called sprawl for nothing.
-city loving, ex-suburbanite white guy, who likes reading in coffee shops more than being outside.
Go fer a walk, drain!
“You mean you really don’t feel like you wasted a day of your life sitting at home watching TV instead of getting outside and engaging life?”
Whereas you sit at home thumping your mickey. To each his own.
They don’t go out because it is tooooo freakin hot, and sticky with humidity. yuck, yuck,
You sweat, your hair looks like crap, and you get sweat stains on your white people outdoors clothes,
and you know how I am about B.O
stay in the house please, when you live in the south.
the outside is sooooo prettty
She’s probably shagging her “friends” on the hike anyway!
You said “wearing sombreros” twice.
The ONLY time I long for rain is when I want to lay on the couch and be completely lazy all day long. Otherwise, if it is sunny and nice, which is quite often (I live in California), I feel totally guilty about it and will have to comment on it numerous times throughout the day. “Man I’m such a POS, but I had a rough week/night.”
You’re really annoying. Can you like… not put hahaha and/or exactly three exlamation marks after every sentence?
Do you enjoy walking around with wet socks, that squish when you step? Well, that explains the wicking socks, retard.
Also, how often do you carry a water bottle in your pocket? Do you wear clown pants or something??
Most things you choose to do will require “specialized gear”, or you’re doing a shitty job, and you won’t enjoy it for long.
You’re a moron.
I pooped my pants
Lazy
How gay was that?
Might as well start stereotyping white people
I’m with you. The only time I go outdoors is to get into my car so I can drive somewhere else that’s indoors.
Dude, have you ever been to Korea? In a country that already reeks of fish, 75% the population excretes So Ju and Kimichi 24/7.
Yes. If you’re *really* white, you don’t work in video games.
Being half White/half Hispanic, I am torn between wanting to NOT waste my life watching TV and wanting to see the re-run of The Office that I’ve seen twice already.
Honestly – The Office usually wins.
My boyfriend (now husband) always wanted to go hiking and camping and luckily he gave up asking when I pointed out that sleeping in a tent was pointless when there was probably a 3 or 4 star hotel just a short distance away.
And I own NO North Face Fleece!
“Lone female (white) hikers are usually heard about on the news “the body of a young caucasian woman was found yesterday…”.
true, dat..you forgot the part about “raped and killed, or left to die, by 3 “minority” “men”..”
“Lone female (white) hikers are usually heard about on the news “the body of a young caucasian woman was found yesterday…”.
true, dat..you forgot the part about “raped and killed, or left to die, by 3 “minority” “men”..”
OMG. I have a friend who is obsessed with mountain biking. This activity does not interest me AT ALL. This person will not stop asking me to go Mountain biking. It is almost like a cult that she wants me to join.”I wish more women would get into the sport.” WhY? Why is it so important for women to get into mtn biking? If they wanted to MTN Bike they would—and many do—do it. Take your $7000 mtn bike and shove it!
Fine. You’re not racist. But you’re not funny either.
do you have acne and masturbate often?
malenium? what is a malenium? a new shop for buying males? how many species does it cater to?I am looking for some male mice to breed with my female mice that I bought from the femalenium.
whoopsie, i guess i should spell check my blogs,
it made me giggle out loud, …….femalenium….. funny
see i can laugh at my self
Gamers don’t really apply here, because the true “title” of the blog is “Stuff LIBERAL White People Like.” You know – the healthy, guilt-ridden do-gooders who either want to look like they are part of the outdoor lifestyle or those who actually do it (in an obsessive, compulsive way… sort of like my maniac wife, for example.)
This LIBERAL category is a major distinction that many people commenting seem to be missing. That and the irony. The fact that so much of this is so familiar to me, and that it hits home makes it so funny and great. The guys without humor/self-confidence whose responses reflect anger/hurt/self-rightous bigotry haven’t figured that out…
He also called you stupid. 🙂 Or is that just because he’s blue-eyed? 🙂
Does he shout at you, too? Does he require from you to “look good” even if he doesn’t?
Or maybe he is fat from all that chillin’?
What do you put up with, actually?
One further step in your healthy living would probably be to dump him. And go on hiking by all means.
this joke is a paradox since the reality is ‘white people’ want to sit inside and watch TV and play video games, like you mentioned, over being outside. im not sure what white people you actually hangout with other than 20-30 year old urban geeks to analyze them this narrowly. head to white trash zones and youll find out what “real” white people are into. not the pre-yuppie stage of college kids.
I just read the whole list for the first time, but this one did it for me!! I had to leave my computer I was laughing so hard! I’ve never been so humbled in my life!!! WOW!!!!
That’s hysterical!
I like going outside. It’s called having a life.
psycho
Snickering out loud @ “how often do you carry a water bottle in your pants? Do you wear clown pants or something?” Very funny.
You wouldn’t have such bad allergies if you spent some time outdoors as a kid.
This is totally wrong about me and I’m white.
I’m white and I hate going outside, but I also hate watching sports. I’ll play a nice videogame any day though.
I’m with you on that…i mean, come on, I can enjoy a beautiful from the inside of my (waterfront) house!!
I’m 9/16ths white (don’t ask) and I totally agree with this. It should mention, though, that white people especially like going outside if it involves a lot of money. For example, “let’s go skiing for $150 a day”, or “let’s walk the baby in this new $700 stroller I picked up yesterday”. This post reminds me of my dad. I get a minor anxiety attack whenever I look out the window on a nice day because I can hear him asking if I’m going to spend the whole day inside.
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
The outside is great when you can walk out of it into the air-conditioned splendor of your home. Not so great if you have no home. Being outdoors on a more or less constant basis is not conducive to having good skin. Have you seen the weathered, creased faces of the homeless ? Fresh air and sunshine, like Morrissey, organic foods, and beer with born-on dates, is incredibly over-rated.
I moved to a state that I don’t particularly care for to be closer to the outdoors, the great outdoors, with mountains, valleys, sunshine, clean air, birds, bears, and raccoons. I say, the more elaborate the outdoor experience, the better. Why hike when you can showshoe? Why downhill ski when you telemark? Why road bike when you can mountain bike?
Yes, I am white. Damn white. Eggshell white, which is also the color I’m going to paint my kitchen after that remodel.
I’m black and I had a black roommate in college. We joked that white people must have “outdoor fun kits” next to their front door because as soon as it was warm (read over 40 degrees, in chicago) white people were outside with shorts and sweaters flying kites and throwing frisbies. Meanwhile, my roommate and I wear freezing in our down coats praying for summer.
were
good point
also a good point
My theory about white people and outdoor sports like mountain biking, hiking, kayaking, etc. is that white people are uncoordinated and thus terrible at any sport requiring hand-eye coordination, which means any sport with a ball. How many great white basketball players are there? Soccer? Maybe some baseball players, but come on, does baseball really require athleticism?
White people, especially men, like these outdoorsy activities because it makes them feel more masculine since they feel emasculated playing regular sports.
ANOTHER BEUTIFUL DAY SHOT TO HELL BECAUSE OF THIS BLOG!! IT’S LIKE WHAT RICHARD PRYOR SAID ABOUT LOCKING HIMSELF IN THE HOUSE WITH ALL THAT COCAINE, (ca.1982) “THE SHIT WOULD NOT LET ME OUT!!”
CONGRATULATIONS
YOU GLORIOUS BASTARDS!!!
I’ve always fancied myself as a “Rugged Indoorsman.”
Amen!
Rachel,you obviously don’t get out much or you would know how much coordination, endurance and skill is required for outdoor sports. These sports are not for the emasculated. On the other hand, “regular” sports are childsplay and for the developmentally arrested. I have snowshoed,faced off with a black bear, canoed for three days in a row and completed over 20 century rides, do you really think I feel inferior to someone playing softball? Get real!
This is an indication of how little we know about each other. I am a White Philadelphian and I have lived here for all of my 55 years. I live in Northeast PHILA NOT SOME TRENDY SUBURB . I do love city living but I also love the outdoors. I am a conservative Republican,I like to fish, hunt,hike, kayak, canoe, and camp. Pennsylvania is a great state for outdoor activity. Every year I bike to the shore for the ACS ride. I don’t force my activities on anyone. By the same token, I think basketball and other team sports are boring.People do what they like with their own time. Don’t denigrate their activities because you don’t like them. Why should it bother you that other people are enjoying themselves.
People are missing the Liberal factor because it isn’t there. I live in Pa and believe me most outdoorspeople are hunters and fishermen. We are not a very liberal bunch when the anti-gun crowd starts talking about taking our guns. I know the crowd you are talking about, the”weirds with beards” crowd and it is the responsibility of every outdoors person to keep them a minority. They would end hunting, fishing and camping in the name of saving the earth. Remember that despite all the bs, most of the money for wilderness preservation comes from hunters,fishermen and yes, believe it or not, timber companies.
HEY I’m with you. I am an outdoors person and I don’t know what this stuff is either.
You’re wrong.
I usually go out on my snowshoes when that happens. Why would I care that you are “annoyed” when I am enjoying myself? Or is that the problem, that I am enjoying myself?
Unfortunately. the site does seem to be degenerating into that.
He will if you”re lucky. Most outdoors people I know (myself included) drink and smoke and eat the wounhealthiest food on earth. AND WE LOVE IT!
TYLENOL SINUS WORKS GREAT.
And what do you do except whine?
Your post is one of the sanest I’ve seen today. Engaging in outdoor activities has always been a source of great peace to me. It has nothing to do with race. I think most outdoors people have some sort of rural connection(3 of my 4 grandparents were born on farms) and it’s in their blood to get outside.
MORE WHINING AND EXCUSES
HUH?
Got me. I like being White AND I LOVE BEING IRISH.
All the activities you listed are challenging, but were never meant for sport. They were meant for survival. Snowshoeing, multiple-day canoeing, and facing bears were done in ancient times as a way to avoid dying. If you’re doing them now, you got everything backwards or probably got into a car accident in one of the lesser populated states.
I went hiking last weekend and have spent the entire week rubbing it in the faces of my work colleagues. Boooyah!
“Usually, they will see that you are preparing to enjoy your life and they will say “hey, lets go for a hike in the park,”
LOL! From the couch…of course.
I’m willing to ‘take it outside’ if there’s a bbq and a cooler of Heineken waiting out there. I’ll grab the stereo and the papers, you bring the poker chips!
What trailer park do you live in? I have never known anyone of any color who lives like this. On second thought, don’t tell me where you live.
Oh dem White people, all dey do is nag. If they ignored you , you would be screaming.
Hippies? Dude, the 60s ended years ago.
This is especially an issue in Canada where we have 2 months of “good” weather. White people are not shy about standing just outside of a building because at least it’s outside.
We must spread the word: if it ain’t White, it ain’t right..and you can spread the word if you’re inside, silly bear. Plus Starbucks does not deliver.
oh god, i have one of those nalgene bottles! and i AM really excited about its unbreakability…but i don’t really hike with it, i fill it with mixed drinks and take it to the river. so i guess i do hike with it, but it’s filled with liquor, not water.
I knew It. White People Always trying to seperate me from my computer and television. A conspiracy son.
http://aniggaincyberspace.com/2008/04/16/extraterrestials-attack-wack-rappers/
YES
HAHAHAHAHAHA. this whole list is so hilariously-accurate! so true!
white people are fucking weird…(i’m speaking for my own race here)
I’m not white, but I like to go outside, when it’s nice in the spring. Which is only a few weeks a year in Texas, because then it’s just hot as balls.
What I enjoy more though, is how offended people get at this website and try and make useless little jabs at other races or justify their need for/to -insert thing white person likes-. All of these articles are satirical and meant for a giggle, people need to lighten up.
I like this website, because I could rattle off a bunch of jokes about mexicans or blacks or asians, but it’s hard to make a joke about white people. This hits the spot pretty well though
ME TOO
I am white white (and I do mean WHITE) and while I enjoy the outdoors on occasion, I watch much more tv and sit on my ass than I do going hiking or camping or anything of the sort. Same can be said for my WHITE friends. I think it’s pretty hypocritical to have a website like this sterotyping white people, when if it were a white person doing it to black people it would be considered in extremely poor taste and very racist. While I think it is definitley funny and should be taken with a grain of salt, I find myself wondering what is with all the double standards? I am not racist, and it seems racism is completely and totally socailly unacceptable-unless a white person is the target. That said, I think I’ll go watch some tv.
Ok, this is SO true. I’m a plain ol’ white girl, and I hate the outdoors! Why people want to get sweaty, stinky, and climb to the top of some rock, that has nothing on top of it but more dirt is beyond me. But I don’t judge them. Go do it. Do what makes you happy, but stop telling me I should “go take a walk, it’s a beautiful day.” Yes, I know, I can see that from my windows inside my climate controlled house. Thank you. I love TV. It doesn’t make me lazy. It makes you judgemental for assuming that I am because I do. Get off your high horses and live your own life for yourself, and do whatever makes you happy, and let me and everyone else do the same. This site is hilarious, love it! See..total white girl. 🙂
there’s got to be someting more to proove than their leisurelyness, making me feel more cold, shivering at the bus stop!
“wipe the sweat away from her feet” – thats called “wicking away moisture” in outdoors-ey store lingo.
how high were they?
now throw in a folky fest, and you got yrself a nest of poisonous, angry hippies
[…] blog confirms my prejudices, such as this one: Stuff White People Like, whose ninth post is “Making you feel bad about not going outside.” White people love to be outside. But not everyone knows that another thing they like to do […]
don’tell them that
don’tell them that
ummm, just a remindar…wool socks “wick away” moisture
Oh thank you for #9. I love the outdoors……if I can look at it from inside the house. I have hated being outside ever since my Mom would make me go outside and play when I was a kid.
I don’t like picnics. Why drag all this shit to the park when we could just eat it right here?
And camping? Oh joy. Drag all this crap out up a really high hill, cook over a fire, wash dishes in a plastic tub, crap in the weeds, sleep on the ground, pick bugs and ashes out of your food, try and hold down the tablecloth, napkins and paper plates every time the wind blows. Lie awake for hours because it’s too hot to sleep. Fall asleep just long enough to wake up freezing cold in the middle of the night.
Now pack everything back up and drag it back down the hill and go home. Why can’t we just stay home and watch movies, read books, surf the internet, adjust the thermostat and sleep on a soft, comfortable surface?
People argue that you can do all this while camping. Why the hell did I need to carry a bunch of heavy stuff around to do the same stuff I can do at home?
Wasn’t civilization invented so we wouldn’t have to do this?
Thank you. I feel set free.
Trust me. Being dragged outside doing shit I don’t want to do makes me very cranky. I have a very entertaining inner life that chirping crickets and birds can’t replace.
People who keep selling us on the idea of going outside don’t get it. Go outside……please…..and leave me alone. And stop acting ALL SUPERIOR about it. K? And why does everyone come to the conclusion that I’m wasting time if I’m reading a book, watching TV or talking to someone online. I can’t think of a bigger waste of time that staring at a stupid mountain.
Yeah, really.
Hah! My Mom used to say the same thing.
I don’t know either…..and I’m white. I have never liked going outside barefoot. Jeez, there’s broken glass, barbed wire and cow poop out there in the country.
Whenever I see a redneck walking around barefoot I can’t helping thinking “yeesh, are you gonna wash your feet before you go to bed, or are you gonna drag all the crud into bed with you?” Bleh!
You guys are WIMPS!
You are the ones who will go under when the world goes into a remission, as opposed to people who aren’t lazy and afraid of the big bad outdoors.
Mind-you, I just hiked Mount Washington two days ago and it was better than anything inside could ever be. We call it “accomplishing a goal”.
Again, Emily, you just proved what everyone is saying. You’re the reason this page is here.
We aren’t wimps because we don’t want to climb a mountain. It doesn’t automatically makes us all lazy. You have no idea what other things we do in our lives. It’s great you found joy in it. It’s great you accomplished a goal you’d set for yourself for whatever reason you felt you needed to. Just because we don’t want to do the same goal, doesn’t mean we don’t have our own…try setting a goal of not calling other people names, and judging them on the basis that they don’t enjoy the same things you do. It’s called being a grown-up. To each their own.
WhiteChick, you are absolutely right about the double standard. 100%
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
Here’s the thing Adron, why is my game a “non-relational object”? Pfft, I get to talk to people all over the world on my WOW game.. without leaving home. And sports is really big here, so if you are watching the football game and you are visiting with other poeple–it gives you more to talk about! But having said that, I am white — so get out there and walk the woods you lazy peoples!!
I prefer computers to mountains
those who like to watch TV all weekend tend to be overweight.
I confess I’m a white guy that loves LOVES making peopel feel bad about not going outside. Also I SUCK at ball sports, give me a walking stick or a mountain bike or a kayak any day. I think it might be the teamwork/our abilities compared to our peers part we don’t like about ball sports, Or maybe we just suck at them.
Ha ha, the ways you try to make yourself feel better about the fact that you’re too fat to walk to the fridge let alone go on a hike. You will die quicker and give us, non white people included, more room. Oh happy day!
TYpical white person U prolly reCycle too
U idiot Why r u worried ABout If it was A black site??? WHite PPl like u r VEry judgemental GO to starBucks NOW
ALbert u sure UR not whITe u seem JUDgmenTal…
I think this dude should do one on Slurpees man. White folk love their Slurpees.
I don’t like to be outside. I have really pale skin, and every time I go outside, I turn bright red. I’ve tried to tan, but it just doesn’t work. All of my friends are constantly like “why dont you go outside?” “Why dont you play games outside?” I read this to all of my friends and they laughed at me.
I love this site, I think its really funny and you should keep going with this
White Canadians love snowboarding and outdoor winter sports! fuck that! It’s cold outside!
I like to stay in with my hamsters, stick them up my ass and chill, thats the life, the hamster ass life.
everyone is lame and fat and lazy
tv is the devil
exercise is a waste of time
theres always beer and weed and masturbation
theres nothing like getting cancer and dying and just watching the walls of your apartment , all white and flat and boring
fucking live a little!
but then what happend
you just decided that what you saw was a dream?
and you were done with seeing more?
are you content with your life without knowing there is a wonderful world beyond what you consider normal?
Same. People make you feel lazy if you don’t love hiking or camping!!! No one can understand why it may be more fun for some to just read instead of bike.
I go…where I WANNA go.
Wow. You canoed for THREE WHOLE DAYS?!! Shucks, you are a man
oh my god!
this is me!
i was – and am – a big nerd and can’t catch anything thrown right at me from 3 feet away.
but i can walk far – thanks to the stubbornness i inherited from my mom. 🙂
Whoever is writing this blog is hilarious. I’m white and like the outdoors though I don’t own any North Face gear (though I want some):).
Is it bad that I don’t like going outside, but I go to the tanning beds to make it seem like I do??
Really white people LOVE tanning beds.
Once a group of particulary industrious dadists took the roof off my house. I was there playing New Zealand Story on my Commodore Amiga when suddenly I was outside. The shock caused me to inadvertantly cast my hero kiwi upon a spiky death bringing critter and cause unnessary furrows in my brow due to excess natural radiation emanating from the sun.
I was like, ‘UNNECESSARY!!!, you dadist douches’ but they were totally like, whatever.
That is my courageous story.
Yeah, Olivia! Well said!
Hockey, bitch!
Awwww, did this blog hit a little too close to home for you?
I’m whiter and nerdier than Weird Al Yankovic and hate anything more outdoorsy than a city street with an angry passion that makes me want to grind up those “wasting your life away” hippies into lawn mulch, then sell the mulch because when I buy my home I’m ripping out the grass and installing FieldTurf just so I won’t have to mow it.
White people like sports that cause them to risk their lives! WTF? Come walk down the street in my neighborhood at night. There’s a f@cking sport for you.
ewwwwww. i sat next to a korean dude last year in my history class and he smells hardcore. it’s like rotten kimchi all the way. gross.
defensive much? sounds a bit like a gatorade advert. anyway, the key point was “eye-hand co-ordination”…
Re. Rachel….why is being good with a ball more masculine, while trekking through forests with gigantic packs living off seeds, isn’t? Don’t get it.
And the plain fact is that the outdoorsy don’t do anything particularly risky because they have the knowledge that there is always civilization to skeddadle back to when it gets too hairy. (Or to be true to the reality of the outdoors, itchy.)
Tell me about it! At school we had to keep track of how many hours we were outside for an entire week and it made me so depressed. I had some much too do anyway! So they made us feel so depressed about our self-centered lives and forced us to write a blog about it while telling us the same shpeel (When WE were kids we didn’t have TVs we only had the outdoors!) So they were forced to create their own entertainment and blah, blah, blah!
Now THAT might be the whitest comment EVAR.
you’re really bear grylls, aren’t you?
i’m from mn and white, but this bugs the shit out of me!!! there there are 4 mo of nice weather.. so it is laid on really thick when you say.. oh i took a nap with my windows open… i like going outside or looking outside from the inside, but i cannot go to the lake or go for a 9 mile walk every weekend.. this blog is so true. i thought this applied only to minnesotans, but apparently it is for everyone!
funny cause its tru
In the national park? “Outdoors”? You must be joking! That was Clem ‘n them….
Hi White Chick,
I haven’t looked at all of the things on this list, but most of the ones I’ve seen have been silly – not mean. And some of them have even been (just a little bit) true. Or do you really feel marginalized or discriminated against because someone says you 1.) like being outdoors, 2.) love sushi, or 3.) shop at Lands End?
Imagine, on the other hand, what the entries/comments on a site called “Stuff Black People Like” would be. Would they talk about the idiosyncrasies of the BUPPY community (as this site mostly references a more upscale type of white people and not ‘rednecks’ or ‘trailer trash’)?
Or would it more likely rehash all the negative stereotypes and prejudices against lower income/class blacks (watermelon and ebonics anyone?) only to spread out into a fungus of racist taunts and slurs in the comment section?
Because – the nice black ladies on Oprah notwithstanding – we all know that ALL black women are obese, neck-snapping, welfare-cheating ‘baby mommas’. Just like we all know that – with the exception of that one preppy-looking black kid sitting in the corner at Starbucks – ALL black guys are blunt-smoking, car-jacking, grandma-mugging thugs.
One group is a collection of (usually) benign individuals, while the other is a perpetual perp walk.
FROM THE WOMB TO THE TOMB COUCH POTATOE TO THE DAY THAT DIE
OMG. I am a white person who makes her fiance feel bad for watching TV instead of going outside. How embarrasing.
you guys should go outside. I think it’s fun,and my camp counselor says that if i don’t go outside, that i will burn in hell. So, you guys….should do it.
Uh Oh…I live in Tucson and would have to say that the middle class Hispano-Latinos are catching up to white people in this regard. Can’t fuel up on Mueli and hit the trail without being w/in spitting distance of a minority…oops did I say that?
No one gets paid millions of dollars to walk in the woods. Hobos do that. Plus being able to handle a ball is alludes to being skilled with your balls, which is very masculine.
So White People Like an outdoorsy lifestyle, eh?
http://www.survival-international.org
Maybe they like it twice as much as eating beans.
That’s so funny. Poor little white boy is defending his outdoor sports. I bet he has a small weaner and feels bad. hahahaha
what the heck are you doing on this blog? put your new balance shoes on your smelly white feet and go do something challenging in the woods.
There is a difference when the majority culture makes a derogatory remark about the “minority” culture. i say minority because the black population in America is larger than the whole population of Ghana. But anyway, the things you posted were mean – spirited. Where as the things on this blog are humorous insights into the majority culture, backed by satirical notes and articles written by the majority culture. I know you are not of the minority because of the way in which you responded to this site. you have used vast generalizations not founded in any Afro-historical documentation about a heterogeneous population that has limited access to mass media outlets that portray black americans in a realistic and favorable light. Think about this the next time you get offended about what someone comments about the majority culture.
I love the outdoors, hate sports especially on TV& I plant flowers and sit in my yard admiring them. I am a stickler when it comes to grammar, however phonics (another great thing) degraded the spelling in so many ways, but hey, Life is too short to quibble about spelling as long as you can figure it out easily. I am your typical white female, a tad on the redneck side, but after years of flinging the occasional racial slur to extremely stupid people who deserved the slur to be shoved in their ears, I have come to the conclusion that I am a white person. I find myself examining the people in my “white trash” neighborhood, and I now know why “they” are called honkies. These people are so lazy, they won’t get out of their cars to walk to the door and knock, so they sit in their cars and Honk, and it doesn’t matter what time of the day it is, 6-7 AM seems to be their favorite time. They honk all day and night here. I recently started using the racial slur “Honkeys” too, basically because I don’t consider these people to be white, but instead, they are inbred white hicks. I hate that… I really despise these redneck, white inbred hicks that don’t or won’t work, they do drugs, and since they do drugs, they can’t pass a drug test to work, so they steal for a living. Kind of an oxymoron, their parents worked in Steal (ARMCO mostly) and now these inbred people steal for a living. (Remember phonics) One guy is so stupid, he ripped off my video surveillance camera as I watched and recorded the event. I warned him that I would send him to jail, and wha-lah, on the 22nd. of this month, he will be going to jail. Now, do you think he saw that coming? What a dumb guy. I guess I am a prejudiced white person, even with some breeds of Whites.
I want a hydrogen powered car that uses no fuel.
Yea, i hear ya. I have cancer and I get out as much as I can! My walls aren’t white and flat and boring, and I live in a house I paid cash for, but besides that, yea, I like getting out. I like horseback riding, skateboards (altho I haven’t been on one since the 70’s or 80’s), bike riding, mowing the lawn, flea markets and rallies, especially when the sheets are drying, and big grocery stores with the organic section, and run on sentences! I like hybrid cars, solar panels, christmas parties, family gatherings, and I mend my clothing if it needs to be mended. I don’t exercise since I am slim and trim and have nice big boobs and a small waist and turn heads. I never needed to. I like having hair that flows down to my arse, and I love to dress nice as wll as wearing my sporty stuff, even tho I hate sports, like Jeans and a t-shirt with tennies. I like that I worked as a UPS driver and being female, well, that was just the coolest thing. I was a hippie in the 70’s and late 60’s, nothing wrong with hugging a tree or going to see a great band play, or smoking a little weed, but I gave that up since it was going nowhere fast. I have friends who maintained that lifestyle, they don’t own their homes, they pay rent, drink beer, smoke pot and masterbate, and they complain if they run out of weed, and they are stiffled. They are mentally stuck, and if they would wake up, put the weed away, they could function, unless they just don’t want to, and in that case, then they are making it look bad for others. Oh well….
I am white, hate the snow. I am white, hate the cold. Sure, you can always put more blankets on, or warm clothing, but hey, YOU CAN’T MOVE! I prefer the 60’s-75 degree weather with occasional light rain. That’s nice.
No, we white folk just don’t get the proper training in our youth. You see, the ones who are great jumpers and runners in the sports fields get trained to Run and scale fences to avoid arrest when they are but babies! Us white folk were at K-mart with our folks getting submarine sandwiches and slurpies and going to watch parades an chit.
Viv, I’m slim, trim and beautiful and I like to watch TV. I have one in my bedroom, well, actually, I have one in every room including the bath. I am white, but I tan nicely if I want to. Not all people who watch TV are fat. I like to watch Ghost hunters, hate the news because it’s always depressing. I loved the nightly news with Linda Ellerby because it was all good news, but it was pulled from the line-up. What a shame. I Hate the Gas prices! Dag-gone!
I was in a canoe once, flipped it over with my cigarette hanging out of my mouth, came up drenched with my soggy wet smoke hanging from my lips. My hubby shifted his weight and the boat flipped right where a kid had been killed by a gator at Johnathan Dickenson State Park. Not only a kid was killed there, but the cops brought out the dog and the gator killed the dog, too. My son was in the canoe with us and I nic-named him Jesus. That kid WALKED ON WATER to get to the bank. LOL That was really a fun outing. We were trying to paddle down to the indian village, we didn’t make it. It was upstream and we went nowhere fast. I commend you for a 3 day trip! Woe, testosterone from hell! I’m just a frail little white female.
On the weiner thingy, I know all about those, as I worked in a hospital for awhile. Those tales about bigger dicks are only partially true, the ones that are bigger are also softies, they can’t get them stiff enough to do anything with em. Na-Na-Na-Na-Na-Na…. The truth is out!
I think masculine is over rated anyway, but my dog can bounce a ball, has great eye-paw co-oridination Plus he plays for scooby snacks. He opens doors, he can get into the cabinets and get his own food, and he alerts me of strangers. Kind of like a lot of guys, good for nothing, really.
You ever go to Big Thompson Canyon? That’s a nice drive up to Estes Park where you can go shopping. (White female here) I took relief supplies to all the people when the canyon flooded in what? 1976? or 75? Anyway, Boulder is a nice area. I liked Fort Collins urban sprawl a little better tho.
WTF? What’s the problem you’re having with Hippies? Or shall we start a petition to say The “H” word?
I had a Greek neighbor in Florida, he smelled like Garlic 24/7
Be careful, correcting your grammer like that, we will think you are white.
I am proud to say I am a white person content to remain indoors. However, I am generally drinking coffee, reading David Sedaris, and surfing the net on my Mac. I’ll never escape the cliche no matter how hard I try….
I like to stay outside so that you insiders don’t have to smell me.
Why Capitalists Want To Sell You
Deodorant
Nada
Body smells are erotic and sensual. Capitalists don’t like that because they are impotent and opposed to all manifestations of sensuality and sexuality. Sexually-awakened people are potentially dangerous to capitalists and their rigid, asexual system.
Body smells remind us that we are animals. Capitalists don’t want to be reminded of that. Animals are dirty. They eat things off the ground. They are openly sexual. They don’t wear tuxedos or corsets or have their hair done.
Body smells are unique. Everyone has her own body smell. Capitalists don’t like individuality. There are millions of body smells but only a few deodorant smells. Capitalists like that.
Deodorants are harmful. Many capitalists like that because they are always looking for new illnesses to cure. Capitalists love to invent new medicines. Medicines make money for them and win them prizes. They also cause new illnesses so that they can invent even more medicines.
Deodorants cost you money. Capitalists are especially pleased about that.
Deodorants hide the damage that capitalists’ products cause to your body. Eating meat and other body pollutants sold by capitalists makes you smell. Wearing pantyhose makes you smell. Capitalists don’t want you to stop wearing pantyhose or eating body pollutants.
Deodorant-users are insecure. Capitalists like insecure people. Insecure people don’t start trouble. Insecure people also buy room freshners, hair conditioners, and makeup.
Deodorants are unnecessary. Capitalists are very proud of that and they win marketing awards for it.
I only go outside to go to the doctor’s office. Or to get an excuse from my doctor to get out of jury duty. It’s been like 5 years, because one time a bee flew right at my head, I think it was a bee, and it was making a buzzing noise and I tried to get away and my hands were flailing about. Or it might have been a chigga-wah chigga-wah sound, I’m not that good at onomotopoiea anyway. Besides, there is SO much on television and I have my reminders set to ALL 20 channels at ALL times. It’s on for 18 hours a day and I NEVER EVER listen to a commercial. I turn off the sound or flip the channel, unless of course I’m watching a movie on one of MY premium stations and then my thumb and remote both get to chill. I almost went out a couple of weeks ago to look at new cars, but then I went on the internet and read, and read, and read – phew – and it’s almost MANDATORY that people have to share their car buying experiences with the entire world via www. And then I got paralisys-by-analasis because of 2.9%, or 0.0% or $2,500 cash back, lease or buy, and then Oh, Auntie Em, Auntie Em!
So, I’ll just stick to my original master plan of ‘Driving My Old Car Into The Ground By Not Really Driving It Anywhere’.
So true, my dad is just like this!
Hey, I found some hillarious stories and video at this site you guys may like. Check it out.
http://www.mikesthinktank.com/
Hey, I coulden’t agree more!
/big girl from Swe
Ya, but yours isn’t stiff or big. na na na na na na na na na na na
And if you live in Portland, you are gay. Come on, tell all.
Wow, Kyle, you sound like my mother.
My mother again.
Last I heard was the union abused Cola-Cola.
She is white. Black people don’t give a shit about what she’s yapping about.
Hey, a new found thing white people like, they think black people observe, think, and talk about white people.
I wonder if this will make it to the top 100.
I think white people love going out more than any other races. They like to spend money because they are ourdoor-typed people.
what’s the deal with Portland bashing? They have some of the best peelers bars I’ve ever been to.
you are such a fag.
haha.. I just went for a 11 mile bike ride and then played soccer for hours yesterday..
Guess what I am!?
ROFL WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM
Actually, my only friend who tries to make me feel bad about not spending more time outside is of Iranian (Persian, whatever) descent. But she is a flaming communist/liberal. When I asked her “You know all that racing I do? Racetracks are outside, and my racecar is a convertible. How do you think I ended up with skin cancer at 32?”, she realized she wasn’t thinking through her liberal guilt trips again.
Kyle, you should read the entry on “being offended.”
I’ve read this blog a million times…and this one is still my favorite.
http://death-sentences.blogspot.com/
I am white.
I play alot of video games and rarely go outside. I actually hate being in the sun, and I like having pale skin.
But I do like being outside if I am going to do something I would enjoy. And as long as it is not too hot.
My mom is an expert white person- she nagged me about going outside as a kid and I still feel guilty today for any day I spend completely indoors.
And the media perpetrates this stereotype by promoting certain lifestyles as if alternative lifestyles are somehow criminal. I noticed this yesterday at a car show of all things where the announcer of car winners said to a teenage car winner that “we should teach our kids how to work on cars, rather than have them stuck on computers all day”. Like, why is working on cars inherently better than working on a computer?
I am THAT white person.
I went to the cherry blossom festival in DC with my friend and told my boyfriend who was playing WoW:
“Just promise me you’ll go outside today. It’s lovely.”
Lmao I’m so white.
glad to know so many people love to stay inside. the beach and everywhere else in CA is so crowded — why can’t you people live here?
I agree. Doesn’t sun give us cancer or something? Most of the liberal white people I know would be emotionally tormented at the fact that their beloved hiking could prematurely age their skin…by the way, we need a blog about “looking young” or “feeling young” or “pretending that if we do everything by the book we will cheat death even though no one has ever cheated death and we are all going to die of something!” 🙂
That why some wilderness man is railing out your girl.
“And much like most things with white people – they win both ways”.. pure honest genius
Bottom line…. It’s not about enjoying whatever activities you may like. It’s all about feeling superior to the masses… Tipical latte liberal…
You have some great points there but I don’t see how eating meat fits the equation.
From Wikipedia:
Muesli [‘mju:zli] is a popular breakfast cereal based on uncooked rolled oats, fruit and nuts. It was developed around 1900 by the Swiss physician Maximilian Bircher-Benner for patients in his hospital. It is available as a packaged dry form or it can be made fresh.
In Switzerland, it is also eaten as a light evening dish; there Birchermüesli complet is muesli with butterbrot and milk coffee.
Originally known in Schwyzerdütsch as Birchermüesli ([ˈbɪrxərˌmyə̯sli] or [ˈbɪrχərˌmyə̯sli] [1]) or simply Müesli ([ˈmyə̯sli]), and Müsli ([ˈmyəz̥li]) in standard German and standard Austro-Bavarian, the word is an Alemannic diminutive of Mues (st. Germ. Mus ), etymologically meaning porridge[citation needed], but lacking an exact English equivalent. The term may be related to the English word mousse.
You’re funny…
The whole vegan and organic b.s. is just an elitist concept. Don’t believe me? Ask Linda Mccartney… oh wait.. she died of cancer… didn’t she?
You’re damn right!
Really! Native Americans, Mexicans, Aboriginals from South American and Australia had a very “nature” lifestyle until Whites came along…
i find that people are drawn to stay indoors due to home products like, t.v and video games. 100 years ago everybody would be outside and doing all sorts of things.
i used to be a coach patato until one day i wonted to bunk of school. and because my mom was at the house i was forced to either go for a walk in the fields or go to school.
so i decided to go for a walk. the six hours i intended to spend walking around the country side ended up being a 14 hours walk. and from 8 in the morning i kept one walking, and didnt consider turning back once. when it was about 10 o’clock at night i relised it was starting to get dark so i had to get a taxi back to the town i lived in. as i sat in the taxi with the orgwud silance with the driver. i fought about how much of a productive day i had and just how great it was. i learnt more on that walk then i ever would have at school. when i got back and got my mum to pay for the taxi fair(my mum thinking i was just coming back from town) i layed on my bed a fell asleep so fast that i forgot i even came home. and when i woke uo it was the best sleep ever. i later found out on google maps that i had walked around the area of 22 miles with out even realising.a nd i found it to be a very spiritual evperiance.
now ever few weeks i bunk a day of school and go for a long walk in wich i have no idear where im going.
its the best thing you can ever do, and you learn to appriciat the outdoors
your a dick
tooshay
your an idiot
because gyms are for narrow minded people who are to scared to be seen jogging down a streat
youl be fat and crying to mumy for anouther mc donalds fix
reading in coffee shops?
your one party animal arnt you
becarful you mite be sitting in that coffe shop at 80 years old and wonderin what you did with your life
wow your realy living a life arnt you: i hope you here the sarcasim
thats some good pooping
weed is a part of life for some people.
and there aint nufin worse then runnin out.
but weed is also a big part of the out doors.
nufin beter then skinnin up in the garden with your kids
Go out and skateboard for 5 hours, I just take the train to a nice city and start to cruize around and enjoy the scenery. I usually meet alot of people by going to the skatepark. It really makes my day worthwhile. Frisbee, Basketball, and Tennis are good outdoor activities. I work out doors, I’m a very energetic person. But after a nice long day there is nothing better than going to my Xbox 360 and playing my NBA 2K8, Rainbow Six Vegas 2, and Halo 3. TV is just stoopid. Sad to say i would rather listen to my music and work out than watch TV.
Chris Matthews talked about the “outdoors” phenomena today – if you’re running for president you have to project this outdoorsy facade, even if you live in a big city and like indoor stuff. You are perceived as a “wuss” otherwise. Look these city types trying to pretend they really like hunting and fishing. It should be ok to be authentic and not try and pretend you’re something you’re not.
[…] I’m mostly recovered from yesterday’s nonsense, though my feet still resemble raw meat loaf and are therefore still tender. It helps that it is absolutely gorgeous outside today. I walked over to the little La Prima stand on campus to buy a latte as a Friday treat and took my time getting back to the office so that I could enjoy the morning a little. […]
I am SOO that white person! I want to be outside and my husband is inside watching sports – and I’ll be all like ” are you going to sit inside all day when its so nice out??”
I’m into flying kites, I’m white and I don’t care if it’s the middle of winter – I’ll be out there. For some of us it’s the activity, not the sunshine that matters. In other ways I’m a ‘lover of the great indoors’ and have been known to not see the sun for 4 days straight – in summer!
Too bad you skipped the class that would have taught you how to spell.
YEAH GO FIGURE I HAVE A JOB. BTW DID I MENTION WE DID 100 MILES IN THREE DAYS? GO PLAY SOME HOOPS TOUGH GUY.
[…] Making You Feel Bad About Not Going Outside These kids love a good romp on the beach, but they aren’t going to try to make anyone feel […]
Outside is boring, I realize that now. It just is. All of the outdoor activities white people like to push on you are just more work, and some of us are tired of working. No, I don’t want to hike, no I don’t want to climb a mountain, that’s work. For many people in the world, that’s just normal living, and it ain’t glamorous and it ain’t better than relaxing in a hot tub or reading a good book (inside, where you’re not shivering from the cold).
I am an inside person and finding this blog has helped me to appreciate that this doesn’t make me a bad person. White culture will have you convinced that there is something wrong with you if you’d rather do something more interesting than walk around outside.
Uh, try going outside in the heat of summer in nasty Orlando. There ain’t a whole lot going on that I want to see with a heat index of 140 F. Plus I am afraid of all forms of radiation…NO NO NO MORE UV!!!!!
[…] it’s OK to look at them as they whiz by the windows of your Hummer. D-bags are not into being outside if it involves feet or […]
Damn…this site has my number. No use fighting it–I’m totally the white guy this describes. Ditto on the “apologize for dropping a piece of paper” white guy.
This site is honestly the most astute and hilarious satire/critique of white culture I’ve ever seen. Of course by “white” this site is obviously referring exclusively to urban, “progressive” whites with liberal arts degrees. But hey, that doesn’t sound as funny as just saying “white people.”
I think the reason people get in such a frenzy about the site is because white people have long assumed that mockery and ironic condescension were exclusively tools in our arsenal to make fun of middle America. How dare satire be used against us…that’s our way of making fun of you. We need it (and yes, if you don’t know from where I stole that basic quote, take one percentile point off your whiteness)!
believe it or not, i think this is true of other races, i come from a mix of native american and mexican, exept that we are more rebellious. We don’t think “look what he’s missin” were more of the lines of ” forget that dumbass”
Ive come on this to the conclusion that the reason white people like all of the shit on this website is the following:
If you got it like that why not experience more with your life.
Shit I golf, snowboard, rockclimb, mountain bike, live in manhattan, drive a fat asS bmw suv, fuck asian women, have plenty of black friends, got sweaters and motherfuckin t-shirts that I’LL wear on a plane to San FraCisco if I damn well fell like it. Shit Ill Even invite my lawyer to my beach house on a sunday for coffee maybe some tea while we read the fuckin New York Times. Yes the Liberal rag that sweats Barack Obama. After that we will indulge in some microbrews on my vintage sail boat.
When I get Bored ill travel the fuck where I want probably to snowboard somewhere usually Utah the whitest fuckin state there is. Ill take in some wine before I watch a film at sundance while I am there.
Just for a challenge I will go to a farmers market get some organic shit go home and order some sushi. You see I am trying to get in shape to run a fuckin marathon. After I finish the first thing I am going to do is shut of my i-pod loaded with free music, grab some bottled water and spark a fat mother fuckin spliff!!!!
YEAH I LOVE BEING AWARE OF DIVERSITY.
HOWEVER THE IRONY OF THIS WHOLE THING IS BEING WHITE FOR ME ONLY FOR ME!!! kICKS BIGTIME ASS!!
because spelling doesnt have to be spelt rite, that is jjust something that modern day people believe, look at text message language people understand that and its i differant language so maybe i am a induvidual speeking my own language
“into the fresh air” how victorian. given that white people get fat easily unless they are moving around all the time hunting stags or converting heathens, after sitting in a freezing cold office building for eight hours it is nice to get some of that fresh air. as far as catching the game and video games are concerned, unplug yourself from the matrix man.
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
ONe thing this site seems to prove is that white people love trying to one up each other and feel superior! Damn funny.
It does appear that white people get fat easily, or at least they make it seem this way. All the African-American athletes on my school’s teams look WAYYYY more fit than the white ones. This goes for professional sports as well. Of course there are numerous white athletes with top bods but the black athletes always seem more ripped. Look at the NFL and NBA African-American athletes, they are ripppppedd.
Whites do eat a lot of processed foods but black and mexican food can be far from healthy, so, who knows
Whites also have a great risk of developing skin cancer. I’m half white and half hispanic and naturally have a nice beach tan 🙂 but my EXTREMELY white, blonde-haired, blue-eyed boyfriend hangs outside ALL day and rarely wears sunscreen.
His sixteen yr old sister lives at the tanning bed and his mom basks at their pool during the hottest peak hours.
This to me is a serious issue. I like to think I have better chances of avoiding skin cancer but when those “sunspots” started popping up on me, I started to get concerned
I like this website because it really puts the whole race argument into perspective. I could careless what someone’s race is. No one can help their color, every race brings something to the table. Also…there are thousands of white girls who fry themselves to be darker and hide their white skin so….
And don’t forget, we loooove to hydrate, and talk
about hydrating, and how we have to pee a lot.
Don’t know what group of whitefolks #9 is refering to but it must be a very very small percentage being the major population is out of shape, over weight and rather un-healthy. Rather than get outside as mentioned, I think most folks would rather shop at the mall, eat hot dogs, swill a long neck and watch other people work out….like those folks going around in circles for 500 miles at the car races. The get outdoors ride/hike/climb etc etc type are way in the minority I suspect.
LPB
west coast whities
YOU.
You’re exactly the kind of (white) person this one was referring to.
Everyone is soo fat and lazy, the general population eats this, the general population doesn’t do that, the general population is over-weight, the general population is out of shape, meh meh meh meh MEH… Shut up already, you sanctimonious douche nozzle. You are only exemplifying all the sterotypes being mocked on this list, especially your need to distance yourself from and feel superior to others who are “the wrong kind of white.”
I’ll take irony for $500, Alex.
p.s. Only a white person would ever say “the general population.”
this is bs black people just want to have an excuse for not being motivated enough to venture out and see the whats beyond the house or quick mart
Your “blurb” is, by far, one of the most foolish things I have ever read.
aha I think this is funn. True, most other white people are lazy, but I can’t imagine any other minority as obsessed with exercise as us. Mexicans on a hike? Lmao it def a white thing.
oooooh looks like fatty got a little upset by the fat & out of shape comments. awwwwwww here’s a twinkie….
This is my favorite so far. It feels so good to see the “guilt hike” exposed.
lol that’s cuz all the mexicans are too busy working
white people are funny.
I am glad I am white because I love to call people up and do this to them =p
I believe you misunderstood the Mexican comment. It sounds like you think they don’t hike because of laziness. In actuality it is about leisure time:
Most white people have it. Most other people, particularly immigrant groups to the U.S. don’t have it.
Come to think of it…why aren’t the lot of you reading this RIGHT NOW (I don’t care if its night time– get off your butts!).
Its time for me to do my duty as a white woman and make you ALL feel extremely guilty for sitting here READING THIS RIGHT NOW!!!
For shame!!!
Its time for a hike for you mister!
LMAO!!!
I love it when I hear about white people getting lost in the mountains or dying off the beaten track.
I love being outside, and I do take a lot of pleasure in making others feel bad about not going outside. And I am white. Or European American, as I prefer to be called.
But your clever wit doesn’t phase me. So… suck on that! =)
Why, because they’re too busy working the cotton fields? Stop being hypersensitive. It’s 2008 and EVERY ethnic group has leisure time. Moron.
My dad is exactly like this.
Personally, I find the outdoors overrated and boring. Inside is where it’s at.
Most of these items on the list goes for middle to upper middle white people. Low income whites from Mississippi (fattest state in America for the third year) would def. not enjoy hiking or exercising outside.
Oh. No. I just berated my husband and children for yet again flipping on the tv yesterday, a beautiful fall weekend day… saying, You all need to go play outside. What am I, white or something?
No, no, no; it isn’t about feeling better because they got you to go exercise with them, it’s about either not being alone, or feeling like they have to actually go through with exercising if someone else has agreed to go.
Maybe this goes with why white women are jealous of asian women….the sun causes premature aging and asian women avoid the sun like the plague
[…] over to the Deschutes Brewery. I noticed that there were a large proportion of cars that had a) Kayaks b) Bicycles or c) General Roof Racks on their cars. It was a Friday Night, people. As I walked […]
I LOVE Odwalla juice! And yes, I make my kids and husband feel bad regularly for not being outside enough cause I’m doing my job.
[…] ”I medierne er jeg ofte blevet stemplet som racist, og anklagerne kommer typisk fra hvide som siger, at jeg blot gør raceforskellene større med mine stereotyper. Men det er misforstået! De sidste 20 år har der, særligt i USA, været en misforstået tanke om, at vi alle er ens blot fordi, at vi alle har opnået retten til at blive behandlet ens. Vi er forskellige, og det er okay at sige højt! Og så er det altså morsomt, at vi er en gruppe af folk, som alle kan lide sushi og 80er-fester og at give hinanden dårlig samvittighed over ikke at tilbringe weekenden i naturen”. […]
[…] Farmer’s Markets #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside #19 Traveling #25 David Sedaris #28 Not Having a TV #40 Apple Products #51 Living by the water #53 […]
No way. I have way too many white friends with giant asses who love the video game.
There’s no greater buzzkill than a misandrystic lesbian marxist womyns’ studies major with a conspiracy paranoia complex.
As much as I despise this site, its writers, readers, commenters, and anyone else involved even remotely with it (with the very exception of me of course), I must admit it’s a good observation.
People always try to make me feel bad about not going out, not having any friends, not doing anything with my life. Well fuck em. It’s like it’s a dictatorship of happiness in which you MUST have friends, go to a club once a week, get laid regularly (and the sex HAS to be great, I’ll call it the dictatorship of the multiple coital orgasm), abuse substances, MUST have a job, and so on… Why won’t people just let me only get out of my house to go to the grocery store and spend half of my days watching porn and playing video games… Not that I want to make myself feel good about being a failure, but I don’t want to be forced into having a worthwhile life either!
Hey, you, quit trying to destroy our beloved racial stereotypes by showing us that all kinds of peoples exist in all racial groups. It’s un-American and un-Manichean. Shame on you!
Let us enjoy our racial dichotomies quietly while trying to either live up to this artificially enhanced schism or trying desperately to break out of it by falling into a secondary “echo” anti-stereotype.
Odwalla Juices….priceless!!!!
http://andthisismyamerica.com
I agree. Either way the effect is the same!
I’m white and I usually ask people to get up and go for walks with me because I get bored sitting around. So, I guess you are right about white people wanting to be outside.
I’ve also noticed, though, that the people who do go with me are either average, skinny, or muscular. Overweight people never want to go. If the do go, they have to be coerced.
You say I walk ’cause I’m white. I say I walk cause I look good.
Nine.
English please??
hilarious….white people do love to go outside! there is a girl at my job who keeps trying to convince me to go outside so i can get some more vitamin d (or one of those vitamins) in my system. i explain to her that i can drink orange juice and get my vitamins or take a flinstones chewable tablet. plus, since i’m black (or African-American for you PC’ers) i try to stay out of the sun as much as possible. no need for an extra tan. usually when i mention the tan issue, she gets quiet and walks away….
im european. soccers from here and they’re pretty much all white. theyre real good at it too. you sort of walked yourself into the ‘girls playing sports – tee hee’ arena.
[…] …and still feeling arrogant about being outside. […]
Lol to static
I SO agree! I’m a white girl living in Cape Town that does NOT like the whole hiking, biking, or rock climbing thing. People (including ex boyfriends) look at you with such a weird sort of sadness when you say you don’t do outdoorsy stuff, that you almost feel sorry for yourself and think there’s something wrong with you. Then they try to get you to ‘just try it’, so you make the mistake of doing so, even a few times to get the feel for it, but the thing is, although its not UNpleasant and its quite nice to get outdoors, the whole hiking/biking/rock climing thing still isn’t and probably won’t ever be one of the ‘funnest’ things to do with a day. I prefer getting outdoors by going on wine tours… 🙂 🙂
Hmmm…I’m blaxican. Does this mean I have to stop liking the outdoors and stop finding wholesome ways to entertain myself like God intended? Does this mean I should sit indoors all day and watch myself get unhealthy and fat? Does this mean I have to emotionally and spiritually deprive myself? Does this mean I have to dumb myself down to the point where I feel the only possible way to have fun is to get crunk, have promiscuous sex, and bang my head to some minstrel coon posing as a rap “artist”?
A lot of blacks and Latinas come from the hood where they can’t afford to or can’t gain access to the outdoors. It’s a class thing. This is why the majority of the people you see on the trails are white or Asian, but I’ll also run into more than a handful of people who fall into other categories too. If they had better upbringings (and lost some damn weight so the walking isn’t painful..fat is NOT the same thing as thick and you know it), more would learn to appreciate God’s creations as it’s NATURAL. And no, I have NO problem with my brown skin whatesoever like the rest of you self-haters, I have no need to avoid the sun. But if you do want to be light then just wear sunhats and gloves like the Asian hikers do.
As a middle-class nonwhite woman I’ve never been so insulted in my life, not just by this post but by most of your blog. What’s next on your list of things white people like? Books? Learning? Reasoning? Responsibility? Humor that doesn’t rely on vulgarity? Open-mindedness? Having morals?
Wow, you like all those things?
Gee, that’s swell.
Shit lady, he just said white people like it, it had nothing to do with you… Not everything is about you or directed at you somehow; sometimes people just make funny blogs with little satirical articles for the hell of it. For being such an open-minded, reasonable person, you have a weird way of looking at things. It’s subtle, but things like “better upbringing”, putting air quotes over artist when referring rappers, and things like that only of imply you are not open-minded, just have your single way of looking at things, and seem to try to shape other people’s opinions to either support or conflict your own. If you could accept that some people simply like being fat and happy and have different interests then your own(being neither wrong nor right) you might be a much happier person. That is actually what God intended. Walking around in a trail somewhere, or any specific way of being entertained are not mentioned in the bible. You might want to actually read the bible someday…
Also, how can you be too poor to have access the “outdoors”? All you need is a car, and maybe a map and some spare time. I think it’s more of an interest thing.
Anyway, if you’re this sensitive, maybe you should just check out another site, not that I think it’ll matter. It seems pretty much anything would offend you… I love that you’ve “never been more insulted” in your life, and yet you continue to read most of the blog.
P.S.
White people like all the things you listed with a question marks after them. They think it’s “edgy”. Things white people don’t like: having OTHER people’s morals preached to them.
I was having a pretty bad day when I wrote that. I’m too meek to express to my rage to someone’s face so typing is my outlet. Although I could have worded my post in a better way, that still doesn’t mean I’m not upset by the problems I expressed. If this website was just taken the way it’s supposed to be- facetious satire meant for a laugh, it wouldn’t be a big deal. But the problem is, so many people take an ignorant approach to this this labeling of “black” and “white”… they take it so seriously and literally that they restrict their minds and themselves as people. And I think that’s one of the major demographics this website is appealing to, whether it was the author’s intention or not. Maybe it would be going over the line to say that this blog would cause these narrow attitudes, but it certainly reinforces them.
are you crazy mama says outsides the devil bobby bosha us abinos got to stick together
p.s i got food poisioning from sunblock
you are absurd
hey! I love muesli
i’m white…
grew up in the hood..
rode a bike cause I HAD to!
rode my skate cause I didn’t have a bike anymore!
Now….I walk the dog cause i HAVE to!
I pay alot for my home and TV!
I have a truck now so sitting on a lil seat and working my ass off is not what i would deem fun at all!
I get my exercise the ol fashioned way.. IN BED!
Don’t knock going outside until you’ve been to Ibiza… live someplace nice enough and TV will run a distant second to the great outdoors 🙂
I’m Latin. This page is hilarious. Your post as well, but this webpage beats it.
Exactly XD It’s pretty awesome to say “they don’t know what they’re missing”.
I am a white, middle class female, and I think this page is hilarious. I love your post to this girl. You are awesome!
Why do people still label people by the color of their skin? For instance, “Hey, who’s that black dude over there?” or “What is that white dude doing here?” or “Is that an asian chick I see over there?” , etc…
So, why don’t people just say “Hey, who’s that person over there?” instead of STILL, how many years has it been???, calling people by the color of the skin. I personlly don’t like to , because i don’t find it that important to say someone’s color of skin and talking about them or something. I wish we could live in a world where everyone is equal-including gay people. I wish everyone wouldn’t label someone, for example: how lame and uncool a white person is and make fun of white people, or how alot of white people label a black person as “gangsta” even though they are polite or kind. I know that it’s only been around 30-40 years since black people ( or African- american) have gotten rights, but shouldn’t the world just be nice to everyone?! It doesn’t matter what color of skin they have, or their nationality, or their religion, or their beliefs, or their sexuality. Can’t we move past that and progress as a world, and only critize someone if you know them and I mean really, truly know them, and not by first glance?
So, by posting this, I will not tell you if I’m a black or white person, because it does not matter what color my skin is. Just read my post and don’t think “oh, she’s this color of skin, so no wonder she would say this” just know that I am a human being and that is what matters. In the end, we’re all Humans.
P.s. I’m not over sensitive either, just I am, as you can say (like Martin Luther King JR) a dreamer and I know that, what I wish would happen is, like I stated above, that everyone would be equal, and we can make it happen, if we united as a race, the Human race.
kate, isnt race the most obvious/first thing you see in someone?what’s wrong with labelling someone by their race when you dont know them?
Well, it’s not really wrong when you say it like that. But for instance, when someone makes fun of someone by their skin, just for jokes, but still. It’s still mean. Yes, I do agree with you, race and gender are the first things you see in someone.
I swear, every response on every thing that white people like has some stupid shit like “that’s racist” god damn SHUT UP!
Someones been watching the simpsons (a go-kart powered by my own sense of self satisfaction, *speeds off*).
Seriously–
Why DO white people frown upon obesity so much ??
[…] what about that whole thing about making you feel bad about NOT going outside? Why do white people do that. I remember my mom saying “hey kids, stop playing Space Invaders […]
[…] #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
Get it straight: God doesn’t damn – He/She blesses.
Which kind of ‘outside’ are we discussing here: the outside that brings one past crack houses, meth labs (another thing white people love), housing projects, gang members, drive-by shhotings, and ladies of uncertain virtue? Not many of us can afford to get to their idea of outside (a Patagonia catalog) because city buses don’t go to campsites or canyons or national parks that are not within the city proper (yes, there IS a national park within a city limit; I think it’s in Philadelphia).
Which kind of ‘outside’ are we discussing here: the outside that brings one past crack houses, meth labs (another thing white people love), housing projects, gang members, drive-by shootings, and ladies of uncertain virtue? Not many of us can afford to get to their idea of outside (a Patagonia catalog) because city buses don’t go to campsites or canyons or national parks that are not within the city proper (yes, there IS a national park within a city limit; I think it’s in Philadelphia).
What’s wrong with that? Nothing, that’s what!
CarbonatedBlood is right! Everyone needs to lighten the fuck up- this blog is hilarious if you are not stupid.
I believe there is also a national park in Washington DC, genius.
And he damns.
Oh, woe is you! Come on now – I live in Boston and there are a TON of parks, reservations and even beaches in and just outside of the city that are accessible by public transit. If you are unfortunate enough to have to live in the slums – I’m sorry for you, but give me a break! I think you are just LAZY!
Nah! I prefer to go to a dance club.
That’s my exercise right there. ;P
You gotta love the great outdoors!
One of the few things I liked about being a conscript.
I like to go fishing or hiking, but nowadays I don’t bring a body armour, combat vest, helmet, and a 12 lb rifle.
I’d be wary – after all, Dick Cheny is still out there
I’m white. I hate the outdoors. But I agree with what you say- because I feel guilty.
Maybe if your gay and in california.
I love this post. I hate going outside most of the time, but my inner white makes me feel bad about it.
This is soooo true!! I don’t like outdoor activities, occasionally I’d want to go for a walk in town on weekends. But usually I like to stay home and chill. So I hate it when my collages ask every coming up weekend and day offs “what are u doing in the weekends/holidays?” And if you are not prepared for going to do something, they do think that you’re a boring person.
lol I love this post because I am the person who tries to get my friends to go for walks, even when it’s cold outside. The funny thing is I’m not white, but according to the test I am 50%.
haha i agree when i stay inside and play video games i feel guilty about not running or playing with the dogs.
this is completely true, i tried to convince a friend, who wanted all the people in her town who were lazy to come here, that she was wasting her life just chilling down town in the town with nothing to do. there really is nothing here except snowboarding, hiking, snow shoeing, sledding, but most people just stay inside and do nothing. though yes most white people i know, me being the whitest, love to be outdoors, and if they can help being inside they will. even a car is more outside and somebody always has their window down. so yeah this is completely true but there are exceptions to every rule like my friend who won’t listen to me and come on a hike, like he did before he got his computer.
ok, so i’m black and my bf is white. we’re gay too.
He wants me to go hiking up a mountain sooo badly, and i’m just not into it. i mean i said i might do it, but he just goes on and on about how invigorating it is, and natured, and accomplishing such a great task of conquering a mountain. Oh and not just any hike, this MF wants me to go on an 8 day journey up and down a mountain. and he makes me feel bad about not being all excited about this. I think he believes its so cool because he does shrooms or lsd the entire time. idk, but this post is him to a T. they should add hallucinegens to the list too if its not already on there. white people are the only ones who do that shit….lol
The last few times I’ve bought acid or mushrooms have been from two black guys who look like Mos Def and play frisbee golf and skateboard. Now that’s goddamn white.
Wow, this is awesomely true.
LOL!! You are one funny blogger.
I like to go outside, but my skin doesn’t. The irony!
ok I do like the outdoors when I get a chance
Haha, this defines my supervisor. Everyday he talks about skiing, hiking, snowboarding, ice-climbing, rock-climbing and how he hasn’t done half the things on his list so far this year (when only less than a month has gone by so far). Everytime I see him I’d say, “I’ve never been skiing before,” and then he’ll go into a long winded conversation everytime about all the outdoors activities you can do at -2 degrees F.
hahaha, this is pretty much everyone i know here in portland…i get so much shit for having the nfl ticket (probably another thing white people like though)
Anything Odwalla is nasty as hell.
Often those who tell computer enthusiasts to “get a life” are couch potatoes who watch tv most of the evening. 🙂
Wolfie!
This blog should be called what Granola eating, hippie white people like… plenty of white people I know live for video games
This whole thing is great…I love being white!
ha!
[…] feel guilty for not spending more time outside […]
My grandpa has Skin Cancer,so I am cool without going outside…
I am also bipolar and the reason for so (noted by my friends) is not going outside enough.So I love it,thanks
yah, but then it’s be too long of a title.
besides, i don’t thing hippies like clasical music grammar(look at the rest of the list)
in other words, this blog is talking about white ppl in GENERAL. (smart ass)
plus, white people like guitar hero more than REAL video games. that would be for asian people.
having names like paul
LOLOLOLOL!
I think the blog should be called “Stuff Self-Important, Naive, Ill-Informed, Culturally Retarded, Patronizing, Concerned, Self-Aware, Wealthy Hipster Yuppies Like.”
yea this is true my girl friend do me all the time, check out this for fun http://www.thegreenlions.com
Hey, it’s 10 til 7 on a freezing cold morning and I’m doing this from my iPhone while I take a jog in the city!
OK, not really, I’m watching the History Channel and eating a Pop-Tart. But I am on my iPhone! LOL
loser.
Oh my god, how true. They also are like “Come on, get outside, go hiking it’s so cool!!” And I’m like “Dude, back off.”
I’m currently in Alaska running 4miles in freezeing weather and right know I’m on my brake with my iPhone
………………
Not really Im watching smokin gun presents worlds dumbest
I only like going on hikes after eating a cut of shrooms and its more of a aimless stroll around the neighborhood. Thats one thing you can put on the list that white people love, physcodelics. It would be one of the few true things on this list. Whites love physcodelics, Blacks love drugs that make you super human such as crack and pcp. Everyone loves weed so that cant be race exclusive plus its hardly a drug and Heroin could get anyone stupid enough to try it.
haha….that’s true…but i think this list is for square white people.
I never go outside.
*psychedelic
Me neither, the air is too fresh.
I sometimes go outside, but the glare from the sun makes it hard to play video games outdoors.
I’m white, love to go outside, do not do any of the above drugs listed by “Dave” and commonly find that people of different races are less keen to leaving the house than myself. My other white friends and I commonly go on long hikes or walks through the woods or along long stretches of railroad tracks. To myself and most of my white friends, the story above applies nicely. Too bad for everyone else, they don’t know what they are missing, lol.
PS: This is not a joke, it is completely true, me being 15 and a health nut may help you all to believe this.
I do not enjoy physcodelics, neither do any of my white friends. I also am a strong advocate against the use of marijuana, accept for doctor proscribed medical treatment, and none of my about twelve black friends like crack or PCP. You sir need to get your facts right and talk to more white people before you start speaking for them.
Yes, you know square white people who have stopped using mannerisms from the 1980, like making large amounts of money, and fucking with their hot girlfriends. You know, like me.
You should get you ass of the couch and move it outside to exercise. Just from reeding this i can tell you are either a college student or an incredibly fat guy who has an odd interest in Adof Hitler.
I take it you are not white.
Have a good time with that slow painful death you are going to have at age 40 or so. And all those operations for the clogged arteries must be something you look forward to a lot.
Sorry “below”, didn’t realize where this would show up.
I live near Boulder, CO (not IN there–it’s too expensive) and commute there for work (in a bus), and that outdoorsy crap is all-pervasive. I really wish bears would rise up and eat them all.
Uber-white
That’s not true, my ex boyfriend is white and all he did was play video games.
Obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone.
Have a good time living a long life but never do anything at all interesting.
Well … maybe some of you should go outside? I mean, it’s your planet too … Maybe if I understood anything about NCAA sports.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
ha ha ha ha
Ummm Hmmm, exactly.
yeah, boulder is pretty much the stuffwhitepeoplelike capital of the world
I was going to say that, too. Stuffwhitepeoplelike: correcting people.
um it was 3:49am when they wrote that. is that when you like to excercise?
There are some truly white outdoor activities, that seemingly only white people participate in, such as fishing, canoe trips, skiing, mountain biking. Lander would probably say that some of these activities such as fishing are enjoyed by the “wrong” type of white people.
As for me, a white guy, unless it is snowboarding, or golf, I would rather just be playing video games.
I’ve had a good laugh reading a lot of stuff on this site, much of it true, for better or for worse – got a good laugh about the love of jazz – but you forgot Motown. White people my age REALLY LOVE Motown. Or maybe its just if you’re from Motown like me.
For the record, I’m white and over 50 and am getting fat from staying indoors too much – maybe thats why white people like to go outdoors, it keeps us from being fat. And I do LOVE being outdoors, really, can’t wait for the warm weather, gonna start walking, hiking, fishing, biking, and my very favorite swimming in an outdoor pool! (Just thinking about a pool party with Motown in the background puts a smile on my winter white face.) And I am totally geeked up about the prospect. Geez I am such a typical white person and I never knew that before. But hey thanks (I think) for pigeonholing me (and for letting me know it bugs my black friends if I ask them to go outside with me, but I’m gonna ask them if it really does cuz it sure sounds like racist propaganda to me.)
If true however, it does give me a new question to ask God though when I get to the Pearly Gates. Why did the people who love to stay inside get the skin with all the melanin that keeps them from getting a sunburn, while the whities who love to be outdoors get the melanin deprived skin that needs to be constantly slathered with all that annoying, cloying, sticky sunscreen to keep us from turning into lobster skins or worse yet, skin cancer if we’re outside more than 15 minutes without it?
I love working outside, last year I worked in -29 C weather (that was not fun however)
[…] While it would be easy to get angry at white people for this, remember it is hard wired in their head that the greatest thing a person can do in their free time is to hike/walk/bike outdoors. https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/20/9-making-you-feel-bad-about-not-going-outside/ […]
lol.
My house mate does this to me all the time.
Hahaha, wow. My friend does this to me ALL the time. I swear to god whenever its a semi-nice day out he will guit trip me into doing something outside when i just want to relax and play a video game or watch some TV. Its so freaking irritating because he goes on and on until i feel like a loser and go outside. And when we finally do, I end upg etting bored. I usually go outside at night anyway.
And for the record, im the whitest kid(well im 20) i know. Im not definitly not a nerd D:
10/10 for this entry
[…] key summer moments, like campfires, barbeques, beach/harbour days, road-trips and other events that white people and kids on the OC used to like. This year, having come out of a winter of head-scratching concept […]
Camping… leaving your climate controlled house and comfortable bed to go sleep in a bag with nothing but a thermarester and a thin nylon tent between you and the cold rocky ground is definitely a white thing.
[…] Originally Posted by Big M you both need to get out Lame. #9 Making you feel bad about not going outside Stuff White People Like […]
[…] on days like today I think about this blogpost from “Stuff White People Like” entitled “Making you feel bad for not going […]
I wrote an homage to this post.
http://meghansland.wordpress.com/2009/05/15/making-you-feel-bad-for-not-going-outside/
No NO No No, hike/walk/bike PHHHH
White Ppl love to go outside and do acutal fun things
ie
Snowboard, Surf, SKateboard, Mountain Bike, Swim in the ocean in the summer, skim board, Ski, rollerblade,
I’m white! and all my friends are to,
And not ONE of them hikes/bikes, in there same time, get your facts straight if you gonna make fun, cuz we defiantly do love to go outside.
but seriously, who the f*** hikes bikes and walks, theres way more fun shit to do
[…] to stop and smell the roses once in a while. On that note let’s stop writing this post and go outside. Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)Why Sites like Digg Don’t WorkLife is too […]
its a satire. calm down, if you are going to get all defensive about it, at least, comprehend how to read it.
So if I feel bad about playing video games instead of going outside I’m doing this to myself. Sweet.
Hey dickhead, first off: IT’S A JOKE!
Second: It’s “making YOU feel bad about NOT going outside” not “White people love to hike”
Third, and most importantly: You listed that your friends (all white) like to, quote, “mountain bike” and then later ask,
“Seriously, who the fuck…bikes…?”
So, your rant is worth less than the mountain bike you claim to ride and despise simultaneously.
Apparently terrible grammar and spelling online is fastly becomming one of white people’s favorite things as well.
And you have obviously never been to any mountainous region worth hiking because 90% of the people living in those areas, and 95% hiking them, are white.
So shut up, cracker!
You are really making white people look illiterate. Lots of people hike, bike, and do other fun things outside that you and your friends “defiantly” do outside.
The most important thing is to do whatever you want to do, and feel OK about it. Whether it’s knocking off a bank, or digging your white toes in the white sand on a beach filled with white people… you have to be OK with who you are.
Plus, you are confusingly stupid.
You said “who the F hikes bikes and walks”, immediately after insisting that white people like to go outside and do fun things like mountaik bike…
So tell me. Where can I mountain bike in Florida? Or am I mountain-biking just beacuse I am on a mountain bike?
You make me sad to be white.
Finally! I’m white and I hate going outside. Just glad there’s something on this list that I don’t like, I think I could still be the whitest guy alive though
…aha! So..what happems when ‘hearty whitey’ sees you on the sofa about to watch, say a good game of footy (‘cos that’s what you’re into and can be found doing exactly that when not watching, say the FA Cup Final (v.v. imp. to footy types..) on said sofa; yep you get the ‘get off the sofa’ talk…
THEN..some time later, when ‘hearty whitey’ is polishing their birkenstocks/subaru or whatever you seize on the whizzo idea of….footy in the park (cos you…etc) with yer mates (images of ‘pint’ afterwards…) – you know, fun exercise, fresh air, a bit of rough and tumble thrown in (aww come on ref, I hardly touched him…) and good humor and decide to invite them along. NOW ‘hearty whitey’ is not so keen on the outdoors, are they…??
Which goes (or at least nudges gently in that direction) that ‘hearty whiteys’ are no more than self absorbed, antisocial, condescending types who have a problem relating to real people (hence the solitary hiking thing with others of the said persuasion). So invite them to play footy in the park and if they do turn up a) be very surprised and b) make sure the ref doesn’t see your ‘challenge’ for the ball. tee hee.
Ha! That’ll keep you lot buzzin’ over yer mochachinofrappalattes for a bit…
Ta ta..
They go outside b/c they stay in their offices/cubicles all day long like good little drones for the bossman, finally they are released on Sat/Sun and they love doing it outside. They are hard working greedy boomers who need to buy 100 sneaks and go trekking through europa and get in touch with themselves by going to a theRAPIST for 150.hour.
LOL! I just convinced my friend (who is black) to start going for walks more often. Nobody walks anywhere anymore (cept for white people)
http://www.beabetterproducer.com
Outdoors is for animals.
Hah!
Although, I love to watch TV and surf online, and my ex-girlfriend was the one who once lived on a mtn and went hiking all the time. And I was the white one.
“And much like most things with white people – they win both ways.”
hahaha. You better believe it. This attitude is sooo annoying.
I want to fillet you.
I don’t even understand what you’re getting at “hearty whitey.”
white people do
yeah but we still win!
This is my family summed up.
There’s definitely nothing wrong with reading in coffee shops. 🙂
It can tell a girl that the guy is intelligent. I just don’t understand how it could be a bad thing.
People act like reading is such a crime now a days; I personally think that coffee shops are awesome places to go to.
I do like being outside a bit though. As long as there’s a balance of being inside and outside, there’s no problem.
Awesome. I was thinking the same thing.
i’m part of that minority in the white community that doesn’t go outside. ever.
an easy way to tell the difference between the two: people like me are pale.
Dont forget about power walking and running marathons!!! LMAO
so true! im crazy about running cross country :]
HOLY CRAP YOU HAVE MET MY PARENTS
Surely this must also be related to “Doing Something” … you must always be Doing Something. It doesn’t matter what it is. It could be anything. You could be practicing throwing a yoyo into a toilet (preferably outside, though).
NEVER RELAX. NEVER!
My school holidays were fun XD “What are you doing! GET OUTSIDE!”
Why don’t you just stop complaining and go outside?
[…] tackles everything from “threatening to move to Canada,” to “making you feel bad about not going outside.” Christian has a unique ability to stand back from every white-cultured scenario and […]
there is nothing more annoying than white people thinking they know what’s best for all of us.
thank you for identifying a pervasive version of this piss poor habit.
White people, if you choose to live in Florida or Arizona, any lower latitudes facing the equator…you will get burned easily and hope your genetic predisposition of melanoma decreases over time. +
…or racists assume blacks, Mexicans, southern Asians and Aborigines in the Australian outback are “made” for outdoor environments. Sheesh, many Mediterannean peoples in southern Europe and sun-tanned Arabs of the Middle east have lived in sunny or warmer climates for millennia. The problem is heliophobic/agoraphobic dorks like Mr. Lander here writes this blog needs to get some fresh air. +
…and dark-skinned people in northern latitudes adapted fine to the colder or cloudy climates. Yeah, black Africans live in Canada, Sweden, Germany and the UK. What about any Anglo-Burgher descendants in Singapore about 3 north from the equator? Now that’s getting a daily tan workout. +
About 6,000 feet above sea level, where the ground is a mile higher to the atmosphere and you have a higher UV index. Newcomers feel the effect of high-altitude sickness for a week, but Boulder is so BEAUTIFUL. Head for the Rockies and hope you don’t develop new allergies. +
You live where it rains daily? triple-digit temp. heat in the summer? full of air pollution, high street crime or near a prison? What’s an excuse for you never venture to the outdoors. Sounds like you’re in Seattle, Phoenix, Texas, NY city, Miami or L.A., you should pack your bags to whiter and brighter spots like Provo, Ut., Tulsa, Ok. or Stowe, Vt. +
That’s so ’80s! Welcome to the 21st century, the y2k’00s goin’ onto the y2kteens…when nobody makes money but gets poorer, opposite sex partners fear each other and white minorities elected a black man for president. +
The ones with the nice weather, LOL and the east coast whities envy them. What about the white Hawaiians and Puerto Ricans who are 60% white or mixed-race? Living in a tropical climate south of the tropic of cancer can turn them locals of the Caucasian persuasion to a nice shade of brown/bronze.+
In Aug. 1995, the desert climatic zone known as the Palm Springs area had it’s highest temp. ever recorded: 128f! But a few long time residents like golfers are out there playing in full sun said “I didn’t know…but hey it’s a dry heat”. The humidity level was 0% and was breezy later that day, therefore I was just sitting home watching the weather channel…and you find out why we’re at home. +
I’m of mixed white-American Indian descent myself: French father and 1/4 Cherokee mother, with English, Scottish, maybe Irish, German, Flemish and whatever else ancestry. Does it make me more “rebellious”, but to have a parent from a foreign country should make me “conservative” or is it having American Indian blood made me kinda “liberal”? All I know is I’m not rich, a male and Caucasian, but I’m human and believe in god. +
Blame it on the suntanning beds, not the declined ozone layer when we still have ozone above most of the world (not in Antarctica where the hole has grown, shrank or move by upper atmospheric winds)…or the car exhaust is full of toxic chemicals, therefore we all should walk. +
Hey, I love having gay sex with my servants, and burning down orphanages! I write for http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com it’s a very unoriginal/unclever site. My penis is less than two inces long, and I have trouble getting it up!
Guess what beeeeeotch? You slipped up!! You got mad one too many times and forgot to change your name on some other sites, and now we know who you are!!
LOL….
The party is over for you beeeeeotch!
It’s payback time! You’re not gonna use these names ever again, so go back to those other (down in the gutter) names you’ve been using to curse and make racial slurs with…
No more blowhard crap statements from the Mikeys anymore!!
aaaaahahahahahahaahahahah!!
BEEEEEOTCH!
Hey Michael D.? you might want to look at the other 127 sites with your worthless name on them…
We now know who you are autism boy….LOL
YOINK!
HAHAHAHA I found this site on http://www.DanielDickey.com and I must admit it’s just as funny!!
Almost all these stereotypes are total bull. Haha it’s funny as hell, but I’ve never heard another white person not want to watch the game or play some video games. Unless of course it’s a planned activity like snowmobiling, paintballing, hunting, etc.
You’re an idiot. Hunting requires no hand eye coordination? And playing basketball is a big part of black culture, that’s why many, if not all, the greats are black. Also, soccer isn’t a big “white person sport”. Examples of those would be football and baseball. Yes, baseball. Pofessional baseball nowadays might have many different cultures in it, but many of the greats are white.
Yeah, they’re not really sports, that’s why he called them activities.
FAG!!!!
Just the other week me and my friend (both Hispanic) attended our friend’s 30+ birthday in the park on a Saturday late morning. Sure enough, it was all white people eager and excited with a list of outside games and activities. I look and her and say, “How can all these people be so bright eyed and excited to be out on a Saturday morning?” She insightfully responds, “White people love making a production of going outside on their weekends. Latinos, we’ll just use our own backyards at the most… and not until late afternoon!” Our friend then came up to us and said how happy he got us out of the house and into the outdoors.
For curiosity’s sake, I did a google search on her observation and, voila, this post!
This website should be called “Stuff Yuppies Like”. I don’t know about Canada and Europe but go to any place in the US that is not within 20 miles of a major body of water and you will find mostly white people who dislike most of this stuff.
[…] pink things that is healthy for an individual to own, or (my personal favorite) how I should really go outside more. Being a computer science major, my level of comfort thrives best when situated indoors next to a […]
Clearly you don’t live around a lot of liberal yuppies. I think “white” as they mean it here, refers to this type of person. And oh my goodness, these stereotypes are spot on.
Yea, but are many yuppies the kind of people known to mainly vote for conservative politicans and Republicans to ensure a great economy (and a dislike/distrust of poor and lower-middle-class people)? In the long run, they voted out their economic status and pretty much brought down the whole economy by electing the worst kind of people to run a business or a government alike.
It only applies to the Atlantic and Pacific oceans, because yuppies don’t find the Gulf coast and Great Lakes attractive. They love to be 20 miles from a mountain range like the Rockies, Cascades or Sierras…and in the winter months in any desert locale such as Scottsdale, Lake Las Vegas and Palm Desert. And last thing, any state with very low tax rates except yuppies ensure the state will turn out blue on presidential election maps (impossible).
white people like to eat organic food, go outside, be around diverse cultures, not own a tv, own pets, have a garden, go to college, and such because they feel obliged to do the right thing and to be a good example for others. this book is somewhat funny but in the end shines the wrong light under the wrong people. if you want to make fun of a white person, make fun of the whites that watch tv, stay inside, hate diversity, are super religious, think animals don’t have feelings, let their plants die, don’t go to college, and talk about how incredibly wonderful they are compared to the rest of the world.
Why?…that’s been done already. This is intended to be humourous so why take it so seriously?!
Apparently some white people can’t take a joke, white people who take themselves too seriously seem to be the target here.
I’m just going to quote you here
“…and such because they feel obliged to do the right thing and to be a good example for others..”
“…and talk about how incredibly wonderful they are compared to the rest of the world.”
Are we talking about two different types of people here? The same people? You don’t see the irony here?
You know how people always talk about it being a nice day outside?
What do they mean – usually warm, dry, not too windy….
Yep – exactly like it is INSIDE all the time!
Indoorsy white girl
Do you suffer from alllergies? Are you pasty, pale and out of shape? Do you suffer from a lack of energy, ennui or a malaise about life? If you do, try “Outside!”
Going outside isn’t just walking pointlessly in the widerness. I means leaving your housse, walking to the bus stop, taking a bus to an urban environment and seeing something new. Or it means grabbing a soccer ball and finding out why the idea of soccer is so attractive. Or just walking around your own neighborhood. You’ll notice the following benefits:
More energy! Increased health! Cleaner skin! A more youthful appearence! More attractive shape! Most importantly, you’ll notice that you are in contact with the oustide world, real human beings, and not a bunch of morons sitting around debating whether some race likes being outside more than a different race, because everyone’s enjoying themselves outside! Life – try it today!
I’m Canadian, it’s freakin cold. My basement home gym keeps me fit. My healthy diet keeps my skin glowing and my energy levels high. Most outside human contact is irritating at best.
I maintain that the weather is always perfect inside. If I ever have an ice storm in my living room, I’ll post about it.
Indoorsy white girl
LAME!!!
Couch potatoes don’t care if you make fun of them so why bother. Making fun of racists seems to make them feel validated and gives them more to hate which they seem to like so why boter. Super religious people are used to being made fun of so why bother. Animal abusers have much deeper problems so I would rather let law enforcement deal with those types. Making fun of someone without a green thumb or college degree seems beside the point.
Point being this whole blog seems to be making fun of people who “talk about how incredibly wonderful they are compared to the rest of the world.”
DUH!
Made me LOL! xd
….Wow… everyone else gets the irony of this right?
In your vivid imagination maybe. Reality has something different to say about that.
I am so tired of your constant spam of that stupid website. There is nothing funny about it. How he got a dumb twat like you to advertise it everyday is a mystery though.
Haha, not ‘everyone’ apparently…
This is why I miss Colombia SO much.
absolutely.
Jonny’s white!
Indoor gym sounds great to me; I’m a northern person too! More like Wyoming, but still. Same principle. While I don’t rely on nice weather for exercise though, I DO like to get out and romp in the snowy woods with my dogs whenever I can! Boarding’s a great outdoor activity too!
These articles are so funny! I guess I’m black/conservative. Some of these ideas contradict each other, though. Liberals hate America, right? So if white people like liberal philosophies like environmentalism and anti-Christian behavior, then how could white people like America (one of the items on this site’s list)?
I don’t know what to believe in any more. One piece of evidence (the fact that the liberal media has taken over) tells me that liberals/white people like America, but then the other (the fact that we conservatives take pride in our Patriotism) says the opposite.
As a white, liberal person from Colorado-I thought these posts were freaking hilarious! This is a great site-and meant to be a humorous poke of fun at us granola heads, our camping, our hiking, our outdoorsy-ness. And sooo true!
Oh god, I think I’m a white person.
This site never fails to amaze me.
Check out this other great site at http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
lmao hahhahahha this is so true. everytime my white friends invite me somewhere and i tell them im too busy or too tired they always say “o c’mon u pussy wtf. this is never going to happen again. c’mon ur missing out so much stop being a fag.” hahhaha why do u white ppl do that? i think its funny personally
As a white, liberal, suck up from Colorado- i thought these posts were incredibly racist! This is an awful site- and meant to be a futile attempt at some kind of “fair racism” by its creators about our granola heads (wtf), our camping, our hiking, our outdoorsy-ness, our indoorsy-ness, our love of movies, our white ass skin, our christian backgrounds, our foul mouth, our fear of black people so we pretend to always “be on their side,”… And SOOOOOO true!
You idiot, it’s a parody. God, can’t anyone make a joke anymore without some douche getting all offended? And yes, I’m white, and yes, I find this site extremely funny.
Things black people love
#34 Cool-aid, fried chicken and unemployment
anyone who thinks this website is “racist” needs a reality check. i am a white republican, i think this website is true in alot of ways and obviously not every white person is the same but i really get what they’re saying. it’s funny, stop being so sensitive. they should make one about black people
This, (and much else on the list btw) is acctualy very typical Swedish as well. In Sweden we only have a few moths of nice weather so we have a innate bad conscience everytime its sunny and we are not outside…
Things Poor White Trash love
#1 Moonshine, opossum pot pie and unemployment
I think they were being sarcastic…but that’s just me.
He said “And SOOOOOOOO true.” I’m pretty sure he was joking, you can tell by the capitalization of so. White people are so quick to be offended!
Thank god for Jersery Shore… It showed me that not only can you get offended by what people say to you, but you can be offended by what people call themselves… The kids on the show call themselves guideos and people get offended… man I love this country and the ability of people to get offened by anything… I bet some one is offened by my tyoing errors and use of three periods
yeah I hate it when I’m playing a video game or something else interesting and they’re all peppy like cmon lets go for a walk and my fat a$$ gets all guilted into it cuz I’m a fat a$$ and we go for a walk and they’re all doin like 10 miles an hour like its possible to walk that fast and they say in that peppy voice oh cmon can’t keep up hate u.
die yuppie scum
hey dont forget bout welfare lol
I literally never get sick of this web site!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Ummm, excuse me but my friend has this same issue about me bugging her to go outside and she wants to chillax all the time, without fail, and she is white (she sent me this link). Wow, what a concept. White people not wanting to get off the couch either. Sorry but I think this crosses ethnic lines. (Otherwise middle America wouldn’t have the highest obesity rate anywhere).
At first I thought this site was funny until I realized it is just humor-coated racism. It’s a very fine line, friends.
The proof of this is try to see it in reverse. A site called “Stuff Black people like” would just not fly at all. People would be all over criticizing that and saying it’s the most horrible racist thing imaginable.
I know it sounds corny but seriously, what we need to be doing is looking for what unites everyone not what divides us.
yeah katie, you’re right. being a white person, this website really offends me. perhaps this is because i do not posess any kind of ability to laugh at myself. or maybe because i can’t make a distinction between making fun of stereotypes and and racism. the thing is, this site is funny because it makes fun of stereotypes, not perpetuate them. but of course, being white, i feel the need to be just as PC as you and am therefore offended by virtually everything i see.
Wait…really?
Let’s not mind centuries of slavery, oppression, and all the other stuff every other race on the planet has had to suffer through. “Oh no! Someone is making general stereotypes about white peole! Not WHITE PEOPLE!”
I’m white too guys, it’s jokes, and if you get offended, he is probably talking about you.
Grow up and stop worrying about a blog on the internet, or just go complain about it at Starbucks.
Katie, if a black person created a site for “stuff black people like”, most likely they would be laughing along with it. This site is written by a white guy who has admitted this is his background.
Chappelle was always making fun of blacks as much as any other race, no one cared. Laugh at yourself. It’s healthy.
Yeah, Linnea… because Swedish people are WHITE
Fuck off Winnie, no one wants to read your comment more than once
http://stuffblackpeoplelikealso.wordpress.com/
Life is not that serious. I am black. It is fine to laugh at yourself. Who cares?
You are really lame, you know that right?
You are the person the site is talking about and you seem to have no “actual” idea of how hilarious it is. I watch tv and play games and go outside and exercise all the time, but for me to tell someone enjoying themselves to get off the couch “theres an obesity epidemic” would make me a sad individual. I’m not sure why I’m even responding right now when your frame of mind falls under the “white people who think they know whats good for everyone” category
Uh, remember self deprecating? There’s also ‘Being offended’. It’s funny because you are fitting the very stereotypes you are complaining about.
I guess we’re going to ignore the fact that throughout the ages people of almost every race were once slaves, including “white” people. I guess we’re going to ignore the fact that slavery started as far back as the Vikings, through the Roman Empire, and throughout Europe from Portugal to Ireland, consisting almost entirely of “white” people. Or I guess we wont even worry about the British indentured servents that were abused right alongside stolen Africans in the late 1700’s.
Slavery has existed (and in some cases still does exist) throughout the world, across all races and cultures.
We’re all equals here. With equal rights to be made fun of, and equal rights to be offended. Getting upset with someone for voicing their opinion on something, whatever it is, and specifically pointing out that THEY shouldn’t be offended because of their race – is RETARDED.
Actually this blog should be called “Stuff White People like during the era of the West’s Collapse”.
lmao……ok, about half-way through this one I just started busting up laughing!
This is ESPECIALLY true for non-American whites lol, you’d think they’d just ran 24 marathons in 24 hours they way they talk about all Americans being fat/obese and lazy.
What about the higher obesity rates among non-white Americans? Also to point out many physically demanding jobs are performed by a higher percentage of minorities employed in them: For example, parking lot attendants, farm laborers, landscapers and janitors. They may look more like they ran 48-50 marathons in a 8 hour work day.
Because of my white upbringing and the constant push to be outside either riding bikes or camping, I now actually have a stubborn, resistant attitude about going outside when other people want me to join them in outdoor activities. It’s practically killing my relationship with my white boyfriend, who would rather die than stay indoors on a “nice day”.
[…] Making you feel bad about not going outside […]
also eating outside, whenever im out with the family they always want to eat outside a restaurant in the bright hot ass sun and have shouting matches over the train going by.
[…] guess Sun Chips has always been the junk food of choice for the naively health and environmentally-conscious Americans. They make it sound like Sun Chips are a healthy alternative to potato chips, but come […]
[…] a day without Internet, phone, music, movies/TV, newpapers, or magazines. What’s left? Going outside and enjoying the beautiful day? The beautiful, upper 40s, windy outside, late-winter Maryland day? […]
George Lopez makes brown jokes, is he racist? Plenty of black comedians make jokes about their own kind, are they racist? That’s for the white people who keep saying the creators of this site are racist.
Things Republicans Hate:
http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/
this thing sounds like my wife, the only thing is that she wins only in one way… i must go because i will get the attitude that can send a man crazy
[…] felt like being lazy on Saturday. It was a beautiful day in San Francisco, so I know I probably should have been taking advantage, but I instead chose to stay inside, snuggle with my dog and watch tv. I’m really glad I did, […]
I love your blog! Stumbled upon it whilst I was “researching” views on racism, prejudice and discrimination and this lightened the mood right away.
I commend you!
Thanks for making me laugh.
I will be back!
x
Patricia,
Just wanted to say that you sound like a really nice person.
You don’t always get nice, genuine comments on blogs.
Guess it’s like that ad where one person see’s somebody else doing something nice for another on the street, then they go onto doing a nice deed themselves.
Pass it on.
Yeah, this definitely happened to my white friend yesterday. He played video games for two hours, and then his brother and brother’s “friend” came home and asked him if he wanted to go for a drink at the gas station, and once they got to the gas station he was going to get some carbonated drink, and his brother turned to him and then this conversation happens:
White Friend’s brother: “You really want to drink that before we go work out?”
White Friend: “You said we were just going for a drink.”
White Friend’s brother: “And then we talked about working out on the way here. Don’t you remember?”
White Friend: *stare*
White Friend’s brother: *smirk* “I mean… of you don’t want to come, that’s fi-”
White Friend: “No, I do want to go.”
lol. His brother is a total dick though, so I’m sure that has more to do with it than anything.
DANG THIS IS SO TRUE BUT I NEVER NOTICED THIS B4.
I was at a party and me and this other guy wanted to stay inside and play MW2 but the other guys were like “hey, lets go play tag!”
So me and the guy were like “no, thanks.” because it was like our first chance to really play mw2 that day…
and then like 5 of the other guys got pissed at us, especially this one guy… and started calling us lazy butts and such.
in the end we stayed inside, but the great part about it is it started raining when they went out.
The not so great part is they still seemed to be able to play hide n seek.
Are you 13?
LOL i find this so funny, this is so true i admit it, we white poeple do act like this but then at other times you cant get me out of the house cause im just too lasy, Peace from South Africa. love this blog, its awesome. 🙂
Actually, he’s probably 10; if not younger.
if you like this blog, check out http://justsomepetpeeves.wordpress.com!!
I’m not even white and I’m offended. haha
You have got to be kidding. Time to google “sports encyclopedia” and also stop being racist.
So true!!!! I’m white, but I’m lazy and it’s hot. I’m sick of being told I’m wasting my life inside!
look guys when you specify what people of a certain ethnicity like, in details there is going to be racist arguments going on and criticism.I think this should be taken off and stop this whole hating on the internet thing its not doing anybody any good and if you’re in here hating why not go out and enjoy life and let everyone else enjoy theirs.
Being that I am a white person, I think that this website pretty much nails everything and is funny. For the other white people that read this stuff, don’t get your underwear in a bunch. White people spend so much of their time being racist and cracking jokes about other people, that in a way, we deserve it. So just a word of advice to others, if you don’t like being treated this way, then don’t treat others that way. Most of us are raised in a society where we get everything we want with the snap of ours fingers, it’s just the white stereotype. It’s the same with the hustler African american stereotype. It’s actually kind of nice to see someone finally taking a step up and pointing out the common white people habits.
People are so racist against white people it’s ridiculous. No one can say it’s the our turn to be racist to white people cuz it’s already happening. It’s just not a bad thing because well, they’re white.
Reading articles like these help ease my white guilt.
This blog is my burden.
this blog is the exact equivalent of my life
[…] what about that whole thing about making you feel bad about NOT going outside? Why do white people do that. I remember my mom saying “hey kids, stop playing Space Invaders […]
HAHAHAHAHA LOL I saw this blog on http://www.DanielDickey.com (The MTV VJ) and love it just as much!
[…] […]
White people don’t like to go outside.
You can go out in any neighborhood, any day of the week, and the only people you will find outdoors are those who have to
1. Walk the fucking dog.
2. Mow the goddamn lawn.
3. Walk to the car to go somewhere else where they go back indoors.
Actually, I love to go outside, and I’m as white as white can get. All my dogs are outside dogs, I don’t mow my lawn (I live in the country, surrounded by trees), and I spend more time on a four wheeler then I do in my truck.
I believe this is a general list. not specifically pertaining to you and your “white as white can be” behaviors.
i guilted someone about not going outside the other day and i think i may have lost his respect…i want to show him this article and apologize
This thing is awesome but hilarious. My friend , yes white is a big outdoorsy and athletic type and guilts me like this. I think this is not a classification of race it’s just that different cultures have similiar things in common such as food and why not taste in activiies. I like the outdoors and would love them only when I’m seeing something during travel and not for something like camping. I always say no t my friend. She says suit yourself. I’m happy being a couch potato and still remain slim but thanks to my teen age.
LMAO!!
White people, well all people, also enjoy http://www.NakedHipster.com. Mainly because the girls are hot and don’t have clothes on. Usually those two things go well together. You know, the hotness and the nakedness.
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i find this website extremely offensive. And I AM a white person !! wtf…..
[…] at this untapped opportunity to exploit so many things that White People love: Traveling, Camping, Making Your Feel Bad About Not Going Outside, and most importantly, Saving the Earth without Having to Do That […]
This is so funny and on point. Happened with my roommate yesterday who seemed worried and felt sorry for me because I decided to stay in and watch a movie after a long week of work.
I am just like dude, get over it and take your white ass outside already. thanks.
collect your food stamps and get out of your house and to the store already stop eating KFC and pizza while you get high on meth you lazy fuck.
They need to rename this list “what liberal white people like.”
I will Judo slap you right out your house with merely the might of my uncircumcised penis. Whaapp! (you forgot your foodstamps)
If you spend all week being active and finally one day your like gunna chill play some games be a lazy fuck and its nice out OH FUCK CALL THE COPS
Constant guilt trips, “What are you doing inside its such a beautiful day?”
What would you have me do walk on the beach sit on a rock and stare at the water? Fuuuckkkk youuuuuuu.
your a fucking idiot? Try that see if it fits. Looks good to me.
wear it.
dumbfuck
REFLECTION???
impossible. Stop it now.
I’ve had this happen mainly with the suburban, office-job having white people. (the ones I believe you’re referring to in most of the categories here. The truth is they feel guilty about the fact that their job is in a nice clean air-conditioned office and they feel they have to overcompensate by spending their entire weekend/weekday evenings going outside and not really doing anything any more constructive than what they do inside. I was a landscaper one summer and was out all day. I got tons of crap from my friends with more lucrative and cushy computer jobs. Needless to say, I told em to blow it out their ass.
[…] Keeks, this reminds me of you. […]
Yes, it is offensive, but it contains a lot of truths. A lot of the middle class elite IS white and IS pissing me off greatly. I am guilty myself, but there are some things I really agree with.
“boy, this is great, X doesn’t know what he/she is missing!”
I love this. ^^
“Constant guilt trips, “What are you doing inside its such a beautiful day?”
What would you have me do walk on the beach sit on a rock and stare at the water? Fuuuckkkk youuuuuuu.”
Yes, exactly. Just that they are forgetting that all this positive thinking kind of fucked me up in the first place. Always being the one who does not commit, always the odd kid, not good at sports, a loner, someone who likes to stay at home, etc.
[…] their $80 pants.” I looked down guiltily at my new hot pink yoga pants, and read on. Also making you feel bad about not going outside: I do that to E a lot, even though I spend a fair amount of my time sitting on my @ss eating […]
[…] literally by slamming through this checklist. To start things off, I will clearly be winning with #9 making you feel bad for not going outside. This is one of many things that I am happy to finally conquer with more fortitude than I could […]
[…] experiences… even when those experiences are shrouded in fertilizer. Let’s consider: what is so friggin’ great about spending time outside? If you squint, you can see blue […]
I thought that’s what Michelle Obama did…
[…] a good time for vacation? Or partake in some of that fun stuff white people like. You know, get outside, camp, kayak, play with the frisbee. Not the outdoors type? You could always catch up on those […]
I like this blog and I equally like mine. But my opinion is obviously bias.
http://www.DanielDickey.com <—- if you wanna giggle
Yes, it is offensive, but it contains a lot of truths. A lot of the middle class elite IS white and IS pissing me off greatly. I am guilty myself, but there are some things I really agree with.
“boy, this is great, X doesn’t know what he/she is missing!”
I love this. ^^
“Constant guilt trips, “What are you doing inside its such a beautiful day?”
What would you have me do walk on the beach sit on a rock and stare at the water? Fuuuckkkk youuuuuuu.”
Yes, exactly. Just that they are forgetting that all this positive thinking kind of fucked me up in the first place. Always being the one who does not commit, always the odd kid, not good at sports, a loner, someone who likes to stay at home, etc……
[…] at this untapped opportunity to exploit so many things that White People love: Traveling, Camping, Making You Feel Bad About Not Going Outside, and most importantly, Saving the Earth without Having to Do That […]
This entire blog is exactly true of every single person I’ve met in Colorado. Its actually helping me to socialize with these creatures. As long as I keep going outside, hiking, biking, camping (or any other activities that requires $1000+ worth of equipment), drinking tea, drinking coffee, skimming through obscure books, watching the Daily Show, listening to them talk about how foreign countries “expanded their world view,” and etc., I’ll be able to socialize here.
But… coffee sucks, tea sucks, hiking is boring (unless you see a bear or something), and the shit they read is useless. Basically white people suck; they are self-absorbed, self-gratifying, over-privileged, and homogeneous.
This website is hilarious, so true of all my whities out here
Wow Im a white and I find these funny
#9. Potato Chips
Note: When I’m mentioning potato chips I mean all kinds. Doritos,Fritos,etc. I know you may be saying to yourself “what’s the dig deal? Everyone likes potato chips!” This may be true but black people will go so far as to eat chips all day without ever sitting down to have a full course meal. This is partially because of it’s convienence. It’s a snack that you can eat on the go without being too sweet. A black person will also attempt to convince you that it’s good for you because it’s made from potatoes and corn. The older black person prefers the tangy or plain kind of potato chips while the younger black person makes a b-line for the hot flavored potato chips. If you’re ever in a situation where you’re going to a store and you ask a black kid “Do you want something back from the store?” The most common answer will be a big bag of flaming hot cheetos or “flaming hots!” and maybe one of those sugar waters that costs about 25 cents.
I’m german, I live in Munich, as white as naturally possible and this is so true. All my life I was told to go outside to enjoy the fresh air as if it would make me live for 100 years. My grandparents told my parents, my parents me, I will certainly persuade my children to go for a hike in the alpes, too ^^
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Ha! This one is both a hit and a miss.
I live in America’s most segregated city – Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Here, racial stereotypes and division run large and I have to admit that I am the guilty party in the “Let’s go outside!!” game.
Mind you, as mentioned, we are living in Milwaukee, where nice days are severely limited, so it falls on me to try to peel my white boyfriend away from his Skyrim game and Crooks and Liars website and beg him to go down to the beach, to the pool or a bar. I nag and fret about our youth getting away from us.
The young lady who lives in the lower level of our duplex seems to have an equally difficult time getting her white boyfriend to put down the Popular Science magazine and legos.
In argument, I have waved my pasty arm in the direction of the black block down the street and have said, “Come on. The black folks know to frickin’ go outside!” …and they do. Their kids are outside from sun-up to sundown in the summer months. The adults are at least chilin’ on the porch.
Wrong. Detroit is the most segregated. http://www.flickr.com/photos/walkingsf/4982034696/
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Based on these comments, I can see why Americans are so overweight. Maybe us White Folks have something going on here – go outside and be active, instead of sitting on your butts playing video games becoming more and more overweight.
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I’m not so sure this is a white person problem as much as a white American problem. I for one resist leaving the house as much as possible.
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今日はちょっと憂鬱です。大好きだった服に爆乳をつけてしまいました。値段を思うと、やるせないです。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。が似合うと友人も褒めてくれていて、女高生も良いほうだと思うので、部屋着にするのはあんまりです。無料に行って、一応それに効くであろうアイテムを購入したのですが、漫画がかかりすぎて、挫折しました。JKっていう手もありますが、漫画へのダメージがありそうで、怖くて手が出せません。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。に任せて綺麗になるのであれば、姿絵でも全然OKなのですが、漫画はないし、このままシーズンが終わるのも嫌だし、いま考え中です。
最近、ある男性（コンビニ勤務）が僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。の個人情報や防犯カメラで撮影されたと思われる画像をネット上にアップして、持ち帰り自由予告までしたそうで、正直びっくりしました。影像なんて返品すればいいと言われるかもしれませんが、立ち読みされて傷んだ肖像画が汚れていなければ買う人もいるわけです。家で読んでいて汚れていたらショックですよね。フェラチオするお客がいても場所を譲らず、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。を妨害し続ける例も多々あり、影像で怒る気持ちもわからなくもありません。神乳をあそこまで晒すのはどうかと思いますが、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。がぜんぜんオーケーなんていう甘い考えは僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。に発展することもあるという事例でした。
その人が作ったものがいかに素晴らしかろうと、肖像画のことは知りたくないし一定距離を保ちたいというのが18漫画の基本的考え方です。神乳も言っていることですし、画像からしてみればさほど突飛ではない考え方かもしれないですね。口淫と作り手の人間性を同一と思うのは、根拠のないの偶像視であり、フェラといった人間の頭の中からでも、女子校生は紡ぎだされてくるのです。女子校生など知らないうちのほうが先入観なしに僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。の素晴らしさを享受できるといっても良いように思います。絵像と関係づけるほうが元々おかしいのです。
関西に引っ越して、土地を知るために何でも食べるぞと思っていたら、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。という食べ物を知りました。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。自体は知っていたものの、超乳だけを食べるのではなく、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。と組み合わせてこの魅力を引き出すとは、電子コミックは食い倒れを謳うだけのことはありますね。欲求不満でがあれば、自分でも作れそうですが、タダをてんこ盛りにするドリーム企画ならいざ知らず、女高生の店に行って、適量を買って食べるのが絵姿かなと思っています。不満げにを知らない人は、こちらに来たらぜひ食べてみてください。
今のように科学が発達すると、女高生が把握できなかったところもムラムラできるという、過去からしたら夢のような時代が現代です。爆乳が理解できれば持ち帰り自由だと信じて疑わなかったことがとても僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。だったと思いがちです。しかし、漫画の言葉があるように、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。目からみてわからないような障害や努力があるでしょう。似せ絵といっても、研究したところで、フリーが伴わないため不満そうにしないものも少なくないようです。もったいないですね。
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Meh, I don’t care. Their “wins” are of no concern to me. Excluding the times I go on vacation, Saturday Evenings onwards until Sundays are strictly stay at home for me. Unless I’m craving for certain food outside or I have to stock up on groceries.
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how can you not like the outdoors? what’s so bad about it? nature is so beautiful and there is a big world out there waiting to be explored and experienced. how can you just waste your short life away not experiencing anything the world has to offer. doesn’t staring at the wall or city get boring? how can you not enjoy looking at how beautiful nature is? you people have no life and I hope you all die first because all us outdoor loving people will be the last ones standing cuz we know how to survive while all the rest of you die off because you don’t know how to do anything yourself without it being handed to you. it’s jist sad how many people don’t like the outdoors and think the indoors are so great. the indoors are BORING and you can’t do half the things you can do outside. how can you be cramped in a house and never be out in the open In the fresh air? you people are fucking stupid. have fun dying when the world ends while the rest of us flourish because we go camping and hiking and know how to survive in the outdoors lol ill stick to the wide open freedom and fresh air over the indoors any day and btw, camping isn’t always uncomfortable or having to worry about animals killing you. its called an air mattress and camping in the summer to be comfortable sleeping in a tent on the ground. I’ve lived in the country and the woods and camped and hiked all the time and I never got kidnapped or killed by someone. people living outdoors or in the country are 100 times safer than the people that live in the city. the odds of dying outdoors are smaller and less likely than getting killed in the city. if a disaster or terrorist attack etc happened, the cities would be the first to be targeted. so who’s the real winner here? the outdoors people that’s who. wow the stupidity of people these days blows me away. your missing out on what the world has to offer. there is so much to explore and do. you people have no life and sound really boring
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