Stuff White People Like

People from many cultures like marijuana (South East Asian, Jamaica, India, Morrocco, Mexico, etc), but white people take it to an entirely new level.

To simply purchase, roll and smoke marijuana is not enough for white people. They need to make sure they know all the different strains, cultivation technique, and methods for smoking it. They even have an entire magazine devoted those where they actually have centerfolds of plants that people have grown.

White people are also willing to spend over $500 on smoking devices just to find new and more expensive ways to smoke weed.

It is worth noting that at every white person, at some point, has written a high school or college paper about the history of how the DuPont industry helped make weed illegal. This paper also teaches them about how hemp can be used to fuel cars, make clothing, create food, cure cancer, and solve every single problem on earth.

While you would assume that most white people smoke weed between 14-28 (and act as though they are the first generation to do so), the reality is that white people smoke weed well into old age. They also smoke weed with their kids! This is not a joke. White people love weed so much that they consider it a ‘gift’ to share with their kids. Leading to a generation that was not allowed to watch Power Rangers, but was allowed to toke up.

All white people believe marijuana should be legalized, and they consider the Netherlands to a pinnacle of enlightenment. Also, every white person has had their most profound weed smoking experience in Amsterdam, so it’s a good idea to fabricate a story about your own experience there so you can quickly forge a bond. Traditional tales uses the following words: hostel, brownie, girl/guy from Hungary, crazy, locked out, chill dudes from Ireland.

Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should ever imply that people just smoke weed to get high, they do it for medical/spiritual/social reasons, etc, or that there are any negative consequences. This will likely alienate you from white people.

On the plus side, white people are always looking for higher quality, more potent, more organic marijuana. If you promise to hook them up with a special selection from your home country, they will likely pay a high premium.