#63 Expensive Sandwiches
February 11, 2008 by clander
Having already covered breakfast and dinner options, the question remains: what do white people like to do for lunch? The answer: expensive sandwiches.
In most cities, if you need to find a cache of white people get yourself to a sandwich shop. Generally these places aren’t open for dinner, have a panini press and are famous for their bread. There are always vegan options and the selection of meats and cheese are strongly European.
The waiters and waitresses in these places are highly coveted by the white population. They are not quite as cool as bartenders, not quite as snobby as coffee shop workers, but still artsy, young, and more than likely to be a musician/artist/writer (since they only have to work from 11-3).
If you are in the position where you need to take a white person to lunch for business or pleasure, saying “I know a great sandwich shop,” will always bring out a smile. The white person will then tell you about the great sandwich shop in the town where they went to college and how they had a crush on a waiter, or that there was some special sandwich that they always ordered. This will put the person in a good mood.
It’s important to note that this type of restaurant is best for business or friendship situations as it is very neutral and does not carry connotations like Sushi or Breakfast.
These sandwiches generally start at $8.99. Remember that whenever a white person says they wants to go to a sandwich shop you are looking at at least a $15 outlay after tip and drink, $20 if the place has a good selection of microbrews.
Also note: white people will wait up to 40 minutes for a good sandwich.
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[...] What’s your favorite food on the list of Stuff White People Like? Lander: I love “expensive sandwiches” so much. I have a theory that anytime you’re hungry, all you really want is a [...]
Unless of course you happen to be a rich white Mexican, then you fall for every item in the list.
What’s wrong with me? I have my own opinion. Next on the list of stuff white people like, “Getting really really mad when someone disagrees with the majority’s opinion”.
Go fuck yourself you pretentious self absorbed shitwads.
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Sounds like you need the maxipad. He brings up a good point, it’s great food and all but all you see there are housewives and granolas. Chill out and eat a fucking sandwich you loser.
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