In recent years, white people love giving their children two last names. This is a direct result of white women thinking it’s sexist and outdated to take on their husband’s name. It is also sexist that the child would only carry the name of one parent, especially since the unnamed parent is the one who carried the child for nine months. The only logical solution is to give the kid a split last name. White people can’t get enough of it!
As a result we have children growing up named Elijah Sadler-Moore.
While it’s true that many Spanish speaking cultures do this, often times their names are crazy long but are often shortened into sweet one word nicknames like Pele. Also, there is a historical precedent.
Being a recent phenomenon, we have yet to see what happens when one split named person marries another split named person. Does their kid end up with four last names?
I have a feeling that College Lacrosse and Soccer Jerseys are going to look pretty strange in the next few years.
I like making up tribal names fo my keedz. LIke NOS-MO-KING
I have two last names because my parents weren’t married 😦
brilliant comment about 2 last namers marrying each other
I think the most brilliant comment is how you mention Spanish speaking last names, yet use a Brazilian (hello, Portugese?) soccer player as the example. Very nicely “whitely” said, lol!
You forgot to mention that the capital of Brazil is Buenos Aires. That would have made the post even more descriptive of white people…
I have a hyphenated last name and chose to keep it when I married. When our daughter was born, my husband and I had much trouble deciding on what to do with the last name thing. Eventually we decided on splitting my last name, making half of it my daughter’s middle name and re-hyphenating her last name with the other half of my last name and my husband’s last name. Heaven help her when she gets married!
I’ve known more non-white people with two last names than white people. You suck at this.
Your whiteness card has been revoked. That trend was popular for whitey about twenty years ago, but has been in decline since then. Funny, though.
This is the age of the post feminist white liberal (sorry Hillary Rodham Clinton) so the double last name thing is over. The cool thing is to make a first name out of a last name, like MacKenzie, or Parker.
Being a recent phenomenon, we have yet to see what happens when one split named person marries another split named person. Does their kid end up with four last names?
i have always wondered this. cant wait to find out!
What is this “husband” nonsense? White women do not have husbands, they have “partners”.
HAHAHA!
My kid’s name is almost exactly the example name you gave. It’s Jonah Marshall-Surratt. What will his lacrosee jersey look like?
stuffblackpeoplelike – eating watermelon! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – pumping oil! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – gang warfare! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – eating beans! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – shooting heroin! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – welfare! hahaha!!!
stuffjewishpeoplelike – keeping money! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – eating rice! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – kissing goats! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – sniffing glue! hahaha!!!
aren’t i funny and clever!!!
don’t you dare call me a racist!!!
I’m white and I can’t stand people with two last names. How cool can a white person possibly get? Look at me.
So here’s the answer, people: I’m a hyphenated whitey who married a double last-named Latino… Our kid took his first last name and my first last name… So he’s got two last names, hyphenated… just like they do it in Chile (except without the hyphen).
Pele is Brazilian. They speak Portuguese there.
Sangano.
-Praphunk
your all stupid
and i hate white people!
hispanics never hyphen names, and we never give our full names unless asked.
walk into any white school in America, and 25 per cent of the girls are named Katie.
Buenos Aires is the capital of Argentina. Brasilia is the capital of Brazil.
I had a split last name. I didn’t pass it on. My partner and I (ha!) made up a last name for our kids and gave them that.
Girl children can take on their mother’s last name, while using their father’s last name as their middle names.
Boy children can take on their father’s last name, while using their mother’s last name as their middle names.
It’s a wonderful solution.
Jury is out as to how the same-sex couples who adopted children with no last names will wangle it though.
In the Philippines, the only legal way to name kids is: first name/s; “middle name” (the mother’s maiden surname), and last name (the father’s surname). This way you can identify right away his paternal and maternal families.
So when a Pinoy says, “My middle name is __,” that’s his mom’s maiden name, it is not a second name.
If the mother is unmarried, the baby uses her surname as his last name, and her middle name (her mother’s maiden name) as his middle name. It would sound like they are siblings, but that’s how it often is.
Lately, a new law was passed that allows a biological father to give his surname to his natural-born child. (Meaning, a child borne by a woman not his legal wife).
Yes, Pelé is Brazilian. One of the most annoying and ignorant things white people do is assume I speak Spanish since I am Brazilian. (Believe me, it happens ALL THE TIME.)
re: #25
Most Americans think they speak Spanish in New Mexico. In fact most Americans think New Mexico IS part of Mexico.
Double last name here. It’s because my parents were not married when I was conceived. Nothin’ fancy or white about it. Just a good solution for a bastard child. 🙂
your all stupid….Um John Smith, you’re stupid. Learn to spell jack ass!
I kinda sorta agree with this post however i’m not sure it qualifies as “stuff WHITE people like” … white people like two last names? …. i guess.
I think the better post or question to ponder is why do black folk insist on adding ‘ja’ and D’ or any other random letter to the begining of a name and or making up names on there own. Better yet if this steadfast formula of making shit up doesnt work just name all the kids the same thing or some variation. (ie George Forman’s kids, George, George 2, George 3, Georgette, Georgie porgie and so on)
Just take a look at the NFL for instance. Whole lotta D’ , Jas , O’s and so on….
Just curious… i don’t get it.
Hispanic names (Spain and Latinamerica) works this way.
First Name (FN)
Middle Name (MN, optional)
Father’s first lastname (F1LN)
Mother’s first lastname (M1LN)
So, if Jose Juan Silva Perez and María Guadalupe Rico Ramos had a child (let say a girl), the the girl’s name is composed like this:
FN MN F1LN M1LN
____ ______ ___ _____
Alma Marcela Silva Rico
Can you see how easy it is?
Now, lets make it interesting.
Little Marcela grows up and he married Pedro Alejandro Alegría Sanchez, now Marcela can say that her name is
FN MN F1LN Husband’s 1st LN
with an added “de”
(meaning “of”)
____ _____ ____ ________
Alma Marcela Silva de Alegría
For any legal documents Alma has to use her original name.
fuck that ive NEVER seen a white person with 2 last names, its all the mexicans..i know my best friend is one haha
As a member of a quasi-white culture, I will say this: fuck double last names/hyphentated last names. I don’t care if you’re born with it, i don’t care which parent’s name you take but pick one last name douchebag.
Others have pointed it out as well, but my experience has also been that two last names are more of a non-white thing than a white thing. Either hyphenated names among black folks (for example, I recently met a lady whose last name was Watkins-Orr) or the father’s family name/mother’s family name thing among Latin folks. I think the two last name thing has become passe among white folks.
You may want to explore the name thing some more. Some years ago the Onion did a story on baby names.
Popular Black Boy Names
Antwan
Dacron
Newport
LaPrell
Popular Black Girl Names
Shawanda
Tomiqua
Propecia
Sinutab
Popular White Boy Names
Cameron
Brandon
Austin
Dakota
Popular Asian Girl Names
Sue
Lisa
Michelle
Amy
Popular Asian Boy Names
Michael
Tim
Chris
Rick
Popular Girl Names
Caitlin
Brianna
Ashleigh
Madison
“I have a feeling that College Lacrosse and Soccer Jerseys are going to look pretty strange in the next few years.”
– I’m leaving the Building, I retire, You win young man, you win.
mmmmhhhh.. in latin culturess you have teo last names ! but your kids wont have 4 last names! duh! the just keep the first last name of the father and the first last name of the mother.DUH
to one of the posters above
tom: i like the trend of last names being first names. those are hot.
@20- white girls nowadays are named madison. i have heard every variation of it too. kai madison, madison jade…let’s not forget maddison, madyson, madisyn, maddisonn. wtf?
oh yeah and i have seen the double last named a lot when i went to a private high school in downtown manhattan.
hilarious. i’m a halfy and have hyphenated name. i read this to my white mom and she was like “it’s true!!!” hilarious.
Maybe black people only have one name b/c they haven’t been on maury yet to figure out who the daddy is.
in the philippines we use our mothers’ maiden names as our middle names.
Women in spanish cultures, don’t take on the surname of their husbands. Way to break your own #20, “Being an expert on YOUR culture”!
Sorry to differ #41:
Here it is a little example:
http://www.elnorte.com/sierramadre/
You don’t need to learn Spanish to see some ladies’ names with “de” prefix just before a last name (yeah, that’s the husband’s lastname).
El Norte is a leading newspaper in the Monterrey metro area (5 million people).
Two last names is much better than all the made up names unwhite people have. Your “fancy” spellings of names that occurred because you had no idea of how to actually spell the name you decided to name your child and were too stupid to look it up during the nine months you were pregnant are pretty cool too. I’ve always wondered if you all were too busy robbing white people to take the time to figure out how to spell your baby’s name or if that “alternate” spelling is just your pathetic and desperate attempt to be unique in a society that most of you can’t quite fit make it in.
Don’t cha think I’m funny? Ha ha ha ha, don’t you see the humor it my post? LOL, knee slapping fun!
Hello George Carlin bit from uh 10+ years ago?
22 peachxtree
I had a split last name. I didn’t pass it on. My partner and I (ha!) made up a last name for our kids and gave them that.
*****
Ok, I shouldn’t get sucked in but this has to be the whitest comment I’ve read here yet.
This practice of making up a last name out of current surnames like you’re doing the Sunday Jumble is so white it was mentioned in the whitest of white movies ever. Father of the Bride II (the Steve Martin one not the Spencer Tracy one called Father’s Little Dividend).
You also mentioned having a “partner” not a gender specific “husband” or “wife” so I’m going to assume that you are either a gay or lesbian degenerate or you’re an unmarried “co-habitator”. With those kind of liberal leanings you might well ask yourself, “Where am I going and why am I in this handbasket?”
I, on the other hand, am a bixesual cohabitator myself, so I’ll take the aisle seat please. See you there.
: )
P.S. This site is very funny. I didn’t realize how many ways I stereotyped white folks. It’s hard just seeing people as people isn’t it?
Another thing white people like: Interesting or “meaningful” middle names. We often sit around and discuss the “cool story” behind our middle names. That would be a good post for you.
What’s with white folks giving their kids a last name as a first name? Madison used to be a presidential last name, now it’s reserved for little girls whose parents allow her outside in four different prints and red plastic cowboy boots because she’s “expressing herself”. And don’t get me started on Carter…
What about creative, white only names, like Chancey, Britney, Cody, Austin, Cameron, Sage, Skylar, etc. there has got to be more, I just can’t think of any others.
About the Spanish last names… the wife never takes on her husband’s last name. They keep their respective last names. Let’s say you have a couple:
Maria Garcia Sanchez
and
Cristian Nieves Montes
Their daughter would have the name…
Rocio Nieves Garcia.
The child takes the first last name of the father, followed by the first last name of the mother.
This keeps part of the mother’s name alive in the child’s last name. But, when the daughter goes on to have children, the mother’s last name will be dropped.
Down south, I find more blacks who choose the double hyphenated last name route. Especially those with office jobs and politicians.
Hey, now, number 43. Don’t freak out on me, lady. Think us colorfolk gots all the crap spellings? You Mayflower crackers are even worse. Write a perfectly nice debut like The Secret History and then go gum it all up by keeping that puffy final t in your last name, Donna Tartt. Why honor your lineage if ol Gramps, or Ellis Island bureaucracy, couldn’t spell? (But I hear ya, Jenn. Hard to let go of all the pronunciatory help that extra n is giving you.)
[…] #22 Having Two Last Names: “Being a recent phenomenon, we have yet to see what happens when one split named person marries another split named person. Does their kid end up with four last names?” […]
I agree with a few other posters. You could definitely write an item about the “last name as first name” trend. Although I think it’s mostly a “WASP thing,” it’s certainly likely to spread further. Here are a few examples that I’ve recently encountered:
Anderson (boy)
Carter (boy)
Cooper (boy
Jackson (boy)
Kelsey (girl)
Lincoln (boy)
Logan (boy)
MacKenzie (girl)
Madison (girl, ubiquitous)
McKinley (girl)
Morgan (boy)
Why so presidential? I have no idea. The real offensive examples are those used for girls. I mean, really, whatever happened to Susan, Caroline, Elizabeth, and other lovely, feminine-sounding names. Must the names of our daughters, as well as our sons, sound like accounting firms?
And not one word about patronymic systems like the Danish or Icelandic. Hard to get whiter than that! Or more confusing.
On the Whiteness of the Whale
Yeah… and what happens when Jamie Freedman-Hargis marries Emily Schwartz-Grubinierre?
“Parker Freedman-Hargis-Schwartz-Grubinierre?”
5 Jaime
“You forgot to mention that the capital of Brazil is Buenos Aires. That would have made the post even more descriptive of white people…”
Buenos Aires in the country Argentina is the capital of Brazil? When did that happen?
Oh, I get it! 3rd grade geography is science and not one of the arts and Jaime is uber-white! That’s funny!
Or moronic… in which case, it’s still funny.
I have two last names, and my parents were even more “unconventional” and didn’t put a hyphen in it, so my name always gets misfiled because nobody knows what to do with it.
And I get that question a lot “what are your kids’ last names going to be? and what if you marry someone else with two last names?” I am not really sure what the answer to that will be, so I tell them that whomever (of my spouse and myself) is less famous will be the one to pass their name to our children, so they don’t have to live with the stigma of being “so-and-so’s child.”
I think you hit the mark with this blog on a whole. I think that the sub-set of white people you intend to mock are known as “suburbanites,” the upper-middle class white people who moved out of the city to ” be closer to nature” (which is also a white-person thing to do), and in the process transforming it into the set of 90210 (or equivalent, e.g. the O.C., General Hospital, Transformers).
The white people we are referring to also like the following: Change, giving change to the homeless, Hope, Canada, being ‘snowed in’, Al Gore, California, exercise and Japanese animation. They also like posting nasty comments on the internet to look ‘cooler’ than the person they are responding to.
1) pele is from brazil–not a spanish-speaking country.
2) we hyphenates get cute nicknames too!
ps. im not white. leftist black people do it too.
“Does their kid end up with four last names?”
As a computer engineering major (and non-white individual), I could only think of one thing when I read this sentence – that the length of last names grow by powers of two. By the time the grandchildren are born, they will have eight last names.
Staying true to my computer engineering background, I started think of “special cases” – what would happen if you had grandparents from both sides of your family with the same last name, say “Smith”? Would you include “Smith” twice in your last name then?
But wait, I’m assuming that the grandparents had a single last name! So I’m about to do what very few white people have the patience to do – sit down and figure out a puzzle…
@gogirlracing
Thank you for making the horrible, ignorant white people more culturally aware!
It is interesting to note how some people apperr to be proud of their ignorance.
Having two last names bites. Especially since people always ask about why I have two last names. I’ve made it a game to make up different stories about it and see if I slip up and tell the same person two different stories.
even more popular in the last few years is the two last name combinations (smith+olson= smolson or smitson). i don’t know which came first, the hollywood first-name combo trend (bennifer, brangelina, tomkat, etc) or the aforementioned. either way, it is a very white thing to do….
Having two last names is bittersweet in a sense. I’ve been graced with the last name Brooks Donolli (no hyphen) and have just come to accept it. School was torture because you are THAT kid. I was often told that that could no be my last name. My mother would often very bluntly tell people who had difficulty wrapping their brains around the concept “I’m a feminist.” After hating my double last name for a long time, I’ve come to love it. It’s a name that is hard to forget and I get to have fabulous initials like NBD. Yet it’s often too confusing for people to understand and a hassle to explain to every person that questions your name. In the end, I like having ownership to both sides of my family. It’s a good compromise, if you must do it.
My boyfriend and I both have 2 last names. We have no idea what we’re going to do if we have kids. 4 names just seems cruel!
This was interesting. Everyone could stand to ignore Anonymous who clearly has some race issues. I cannot. Get a fucking clue dumbass! Welfare, I would assume is not liked by anyone, neither are addictive drugs, or war.
Not funny…ha ha!
@41
I’m latinamerican an women do take the husband’s last name.
Funny thing, my grandfather was lastnamed De Castro, so my grandmother is Carmen Paulina Hernandez de De Castro, although in the social situations she’s named Carmen de De Castro.
And my mom was De Castro de Yunis, she got divorced, though.
My son, who is biracial (I am black, his mom is white) has a hyphenated last name. She wanted both of her kids to have the same piece of last name. I got to pick his first and middle name so I relented…
I have two last names but only ever use one. I find it beyond annoying, and cannot wait to take my husband’s name.
The only friend I have who has two last names is a black Jew whose parents immigrated from Ghana. He’s cool.
Speaking of names, bet you can do a post about the white trend of going from “solid, short” male names to “trendy, flakier, 2 syllable” names. The “new” names, seem, less masculine, less threatening, less direct? Not sure why the trend….
Used to be: Matt, John, Jeff, Bill, Mike, Sam, Rob, Dave, Dan, Andrew, Joe, Doug, James, Tom, etc…..
Now: Justin, Dillon, Brandon, Brendan, Zachary, Tyler, Cody, Ethan, Ryan, Josh, Noah, Kyle, Anderson, Mason, Eli
this website is a generalization of white people as a whole. of course not ALL white people love hyphenating last names. lol just A LOT.
just because not every white person you know who is under the age of 40 has a hyphenated last name doesn’t mean their mother didn’t think about it long and hard.
i’m black and my mother contemplated hyphenating last names. thank GOD she didn’t. because when i get married, i’m hyphenating mine. my kids would be BLANK BLANK-BLANK-BLANK.
at this rate, i think i’ll just give them extra middle names and let them decide whether or not they wanna acknowledge them…
I’m half white and half Ugandan. My white parent is the one that carried me for nine months and she made damn sure that i had both her and my father’s last name.
The only thing is, she’s been going on for the last 24 yrs about how she never liked the name Denice but was too drugged up to stop my dad from making that my first name so how on earth was she able to insist that i get a hyphenated last name. What if the only reason I have a hyphen is because she was tripping on epidermal and then she made up the feminist stuff after?
Crap. Is my whole life now a lie?
😉
This is a joke I read on a Fantale:
Women have been rejcting the names of their husbands only to keep the name of another man…
Their father’s.
I HATE THESE FUCKIN’ BITCHES!!! TAKE THE FUCKING NAME! – YOUR MOM DID IT!
STOP FIGHTING THE POWER & STOP FUCKING UP YOUR KIDS FOR LIFE WHEN THEY FILL OUT EVERY FORM FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES.
Hispanic (or at least Puerto Ricans) people keep the last name of their mother and father as a rule. It’s not just white people.
I actually know a couple who had different last names, had fraternal twins, named the boy with the mother’s last name and the girl with the father’s last name. At least that way they had it already figured out which kid goes with which parent in the divorce…
I haven’t heard of this but that doesn’t mean it isnt happening but it does mean that you cant generalize it as being a white people thing. Especially if you look at Arab Muslim cultures that take a lot of last names. I find this to be nonsensical.
You know what sucked growing up? Saying hello to the parents of a 2-name friend. Hello Mrs. Stevenson-Fantazzio! Hi Mr. Stevenson-Fantazzio! 21 syllables later, I had finally said hello. That’s one (of the many) reasons I told my wife that her not taking my name was a deal-breaker (jokingly, kind of)
Hyphenated Double last names are for HOMO/LIBERAL MORONS
I hated having two last names growing up. I like it just fine now. When I am a famous author my name will be much more memorable. I really hope that people do not instantly hate my guts when they learn my name. They should hate me when they see my awesome haircut.
A Song By Lou Nathanson
“Tom O’Malley-Finkel-Harris-Smith”
Amanda’s parents were enlightened
patriarchy wasn’t right and
so they agreed to hyphenate their names.
And being it was in the sixties
Peter’s folks were thinking freely
they decided they would do the same.
When Peter and Amanda’d grown up
they had joined the same food co-op
meeting for three hours twice a month
to water flowers
When they shared a case of olives
they discovered they were in love
so they married, and had a little boy.
They called him Tom O’Malley-Finkel-Harris-Smith.
When Little Tom became a man
he asked Sally for her hand
and they announced a wedding
in the woods at sunrise.
Wearing not a thing but flowers
each had written their own vow
hers spoke of earth, and his of water
pretty soon they had a daughter.
They called her Jane Percelli-Hall-Gonzales-Grant-O’Malley-Finkel-Harris-Smith.
Bill loved Jane when he first met her
down at the recycling center
trading in their empty bottles
for good karma.
One day over whole grain bread
when Bill proposed to her, Jane said
Funny you should ask today
because I’m gonna have a baby.
They called him Bob Merzerski-Fontenella-McIntyre-Rockefeller-Levy-Maxwell-Oldenburg-DuPont-Percelli-Hall-Gonzeles-Grant-O’Malley-Finkel-Harris-Smith.
Soon the world was in big trouble
each six minutes names were doubled
drivers licenses were getting hard to carry.
Introductions took too long
and people got their own names wrong
no one could tell who was famous
babies were abandon nameless…
By law names were now confined
to less than ten megabytes
And Bob and Sue knew they would soon be in big trouble.
They did not know what to do
cause Sue you see, was due in June.
There was no way they could stall it
Oh what were they gonna call it?…
They called him John…Smith.
Beautiful!
Many Latinos have more than one last name.
I also just want to say that I find this whole blog to be offensive. It’s a shame that people find demeaning and stereotyping anyone of any skin color to be acceptable.
I understand that white people have some historical problems. However, they are not the only race in the world that has discriminated againsts others based on: skin color variation, tribal affiliation, or ethnicity. Many African countries have tribal warfare going on as we speak. Let us not forget that the slave traders who sold slaves from Africa were….. black Africans. Anyone remember Kosovo?
White people are not the only prejudiced people on earth, period.
And the statement that all white people are racists or liars is just about the most prejudicial thing I have ever heard.
Shame on you.
stuffblackpeoplelike – eating watermelon! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – pumping oil! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – gang warfare! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – eating beans! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – shooting heroin! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – welfare! hahaha!!!
stuffjewishpeoplelike – keeping money! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – eating rice! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – kissing goats! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – sniffing glue! hahaha!!!
aren’t i funny and clever!!!
don’t you dare call me a racist!!!
Someone is clearly bitter and needs a life. that is very racist… those were just blatantly offensive and meant to be hurtful! hahaha! not funny
I thought this was something that Jewish people like? Let me know when you meet a protestant or catholic who does this!
Funny enough, white people have been doing this for centuries. It’s a Quaker tradition to take your partners last name.
But then, white people don’t have traditions, so what do I know.
I am white, and I approve this blog.
But I must call BS on the hyphenated name. I don’t think it’s exclusive enough to be on the list. I work with a black woman and a Hispanic (and black?) woman with hyphenated names. No white ones.
Jackie Joyner-Kercy… get outta my face
White people like being racist, but not in a racist way.
Example: The O.C.
“I’m sorry”, but if your wife doesn’t take your last name you have no balls. Well, I guess it’s okay because you’ll probably end up divorced.
“6 Emily
I have a hyphenated last name and chose to keep it when I married. When our daughter was born, my husband and I had much trouble deciding on what to do with the last name thing. Eventually we decided on splitting my last name, making half of it my daughter’s middle name and re-hyphenating her last name with the other half of my last name and my husband’s last name. Heaven help her when she gets married!
“
I’d ask what Em is going to do for kid #2…
But I suspect it is a one-time thing…
Or having no last name. That works, too. Or is it that white people like people who have no last name?
I just met a white GUY the other day with two last names. Wasn’t quite sure at all how that happened but now I know.
I’m from south america and I have two last names. Which is a pain in the ass when you need to interact with one-last-name cultures.
For example, let’s say my name is Jaime García Zanetti. When I travel to the USA, I can’t use my credit card to identify myself on the self-checkin machines at the airport because a swipe will reveal me as “Zanetti, Jaime García” and of course the tickets are issued to Jaime García. I have to wait until the machine fails to find me three times to get a human being’s attention. I wonder what will happen when I take the same flight as one Jaime Zanetti… 😀
My friends in the academic field use hyphenation to avoid this when submitting papers to conferences (I’d send my papers in as Jaime García-Zanetti).
Another funny thing: I am italian from my mother’s side (Zanetti) and did all the paperwork to get my italian citizenship. When I got my passport, I lol’ed at the irony of being officially italian but having lost the Zanetti from my name, since italians use only one last name.
One solution to the problem of a marriage between two people with two last names is to just pick one last name from each, maybe chosen from what sounds most euphonious or however the two people want to choose. This is called “biphenation. See Elizabeth F. Emens, Changing Name Changing: Framing Rules and the Future of Marital Names, 74 U Chi L Rev 761 (2007).
Since this whole blog is really about the middle class, I’m surprised no one has mentioned the old bourgeois obsession with pretending to be aristocrats. The double barreled surname is simply middle class people pretending that their marriage (or brat spawn) is the merging of two great dynasties, as if they’d just married Elanor of Fucking Aquitaine.
You all are *so* behind the times. Truly cool white people give their kids two FIRST names, e.g. Glenn Paul, John David, Mary Katherine, Jay Gordon, etc. etc.
Duh.
When I first married my husband I didn’t take his name right away. I am not a feminist, but for some reason I just got irritated when people automatically started calling me by his last name, even though I had not legally changed my name.
Then when I thought about it, it’s illogical to keep your father’s name over your husband’s. I am not married to my father. I am proud to be a Mrs. Otherwise, why marry the man at all? Just co-habitate instead.
Even if your parents never married and you have your mom’s last name, it’s still just your grandfather’s name. With very few exceptions, somewhere down the line you’ll have been named after a man. Get over it.
If you don’t want to be specifically named after a man in your family (which historically was used to denote ownership anyway), make up your own last name when you become an adult.
I’d prefer the activists spend their time helping us get equal pay for equal work. Who cares about the last name on the paycheck.
Comment #76 is spot on correct.
No prax, Katie and Jennifer have given way to Madison, Mikayla, and Mackenzie (and their infinite variations — the more cutesy ‘y’s and senseless punctuation, the better).
Europeans and the English have used hyphenated last names occasionally– usually for dynastic reasons — for 1000 years or more, but they’re often buried under titles. They often have more than just a Christian (first) name and surname (last name). My father and my grandfather and greatgrandfather each had a total of six if you count the 3 Christian names each was given at birth, the confirmation name each chose himself, and the hyphenated surname that’s been around as far back as we can trace it into the middle ages. And, that was not considered particularly unusual.
17 john smith
your all stupid…and “I hate white people!”
__
Hey , fuckpiece – it’s YOU’RE.
See, white people ARE smarter!
So, what cracks me up is that the mother thinks it’s misogynistic to give her kid the kid’s father’s last name, so she uses HER OWN father’s (a man, btw) last name to hyphenate. Hmmm.
TO: Anonymous, who wrote:
stuffblackpeoplelike – eating watermelon! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – pumping oil! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – gang warfare! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – eating beans! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – shooting heroin! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – welfare! hahaha!!!
stuffjewishpeoplelike – keeping money! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffchinesepeoplelike – eating rice! hahaha!!!
stuffarabpeoplelike – kissing goats! hahaha!!!
stuffmexicanpeoplelike – wearing sombreros! hahaha!!!
stuffblackpeoplelike – sniffing glue! hahaha!!!
aren’t i funny and clever!!!
don’t you dare call me a racist!!!
You’re not racist you’re ignorant, white people eat watermelon, pump oil (george bush), eat beans, shoot heroin, are on welfare (more so than african americans), keep money in billion dollar corporations, wear sombreros, eat rice and couscous, kiss dogs and kitties and sniff glue, I mean make drugs out of cold medicine, so hahahahaha, its very funny and clever, just be sure you are semi accurate in your humor.
It is funny that people, presumably white people get offended at this.
#73 Jeff: “Used to be: Matt, John, Jeff, Bill, Mike, Sam, Rob, Dave, Dan, Andrew…”
No, Jeff. It was never “Andrew”. It was always “Andy”. Or, more rarely, “Drew”. We’d have beaten up any “Andrew” in my day.
Now, all the Andrews are full Andrews. How prissy have we become?
Pele is from a Portuguese speaking culture but apart from that it’s all good.
I’m white and I find this blog hilarious.
WHERES MY WHITE ENTERTAINMENT TELEVISION? WHERES WHITE HISTORY MONTH? WAAAAH.
gOOd OnE, 111
never mined, 111
#92, hahahaha; wtf
Hey 17 John Smith!
With that name you are white. Or at least part white. Which means according to Barak Obama, your ancestors who did something to blacks 200 years ago, have made you responsible for everything bad that has happened to every black person since then. Hah. Go smoke some more crack.
So why exactly are double-barrelled names so angst-provoking? If people want to recognise that their children have two parents, and reflect that status in the family-lineage portion of the child’s name, who exactly does that harm?
It’s horrifying just how much reverse snobbery and class anger are on display in this website. It’s funny to point out some odd eccentricities about a cultural group, but why hate them for it?
-RS
In order to shed some light into your “white person” question, let’s see if you can do some logic:
A = Thompson Parker (father)
B = Johnson Smith (mother)
(btw those two are A and B’s last names)
A & B get married, they both pass on the first last name (which is still a patriarchal custom but oh well, at least better then forgetting the woman altogether…reason why it is patriarchal is because the first last name is always the father’s), which gives as a result a child:
C = Thompson Johnson
This is just a matter of easy descent…and easy to understand for everyone in cultures where it is a custom (Latin America, Spain, Brazil, etc); however, almost impossible to comprehend for ‘progressive-smart-white people”
On the topic of names…there is a young man at my school whose first name is Cloud.
The kicker is, he’s Cloud [last name] III. The third! lol
The first person that I ever met that had a hyphenated last name was black. Every one since her has also been black. You are way, way off on this one.
LoL. I have two last names and I’m not white! But, it’s because my dad’s a whore and my mama didn’t want me to fall in love with one of his 9405734905834590384590348 children.
No.No.No. I’ve seen WAY more black women with hyphenated names than white.
I think this trend may have grown amongst western cultures since Hillary Clinton came on the scene with her embolden choice to use Rodham-Clinton as her last name. Since then the use of hyphenated names have started to grow and in some places (internationally) hyphenations have virtually exploded. I was in Trinidad for a while and every thirty something and under married woman I encountered had a hyphenated last name.
I even once asked if a women got married to the a man with the same last name would it be whatever squared. That brought laughs.
what about those that do not hyphenate but BLEND their last names together to form one?
Southpark already did it on the Smug episode. The enlightened liberals of Boulder Colorado already have 2nd generation hyphenated last name children.
Every time I see one of those poor kids at one of my childrens events, I just think to myself that the poor kid. His mom is a man-hating dyke. Guess what…I haven’t been proven wrong yet. The mom is ALWAYS a bull dyke or a snippety scrawny feminist type with a BIG CHIP on her shoulder. “Just walk away” I tell myself.
I agree 125. Those kids never come over to our house because of the mothers.
Feminism and logic are not exactly bedfellows/bedmadams.
Remember that feminism’s goal, like that of the homosexual front, is to merge all culture into a safe, trainable citizenry, restricting thought ever tighter. Manhood as most know it to be (but are too afraid to declare openly) is one of the last defenses against feminism.
Like it or not, the War on Terror is hindering feminism’s growth (no more Will and Grace!) except for when marriage became liberalized while the world was focussed on the Middle East.
Whatever damage feminism and political correctness may have done to my dreams, it did awaken a new desire to see humanity in loftier terms.
We already have hyphenated-Americans, why have hyphenated names? Just create one new name using all the letters of both names. Problem solved.
While this is common among white people, some of the more insightful ones have taken to combining their last names into one new name so as to not saddle their offspring with two names or risk the four name conundrum a generation later.
I kept my dad’s last name because my husband took too damn long to ask me to marry him!! After being “partners” for so many years, I was too used to my own name. At least I hyphenated – he’s just the same as he used to be…
As long as it fit on a credit card!!
(Oh, and I do get confused with the two un-hyphenated last names – is it a middle name or a last name? How do you file it?)
Has anyone seen my pants?
The last name as first name thing is so totally white. Especially if you have a last name as first name that is the name of an Ivy!
ie: Columbia for a girl, Brown for a boy!
so whitey cute!
Jamie, the capital of Brazil is not Buenos Airies. It is Brazilia. Buenos Airies is the captial of Argentina.
i have two last names…
What about “unique” first names. A silly ass trend that the kids will have to get through school with. Kids have enough pressure and B.S. to deal with besides being named something unpronouncable or easily made fun of.
Noah – where’s your ark ?
Jadecin – a niece that I am still not sure how they pronounce it
Tijuana – met her is a store
and it goes on and on
What about “unique” first names. A silly ass trend that the kids will have to get through school with. Kids have enough pressure and B.S. to deal with besides being named something unpronouncable or easily made fun of.
Noah – where’s your ark ?
Jadecin – a niece that I am still not sure how they pronounce it
Tijuana – met her in a store
and it goes on and on
actually my girls friend is Mexican, and it’s her idea that if we ever got married our kids would have two last names, lol a German one and a Mexican one lol … our kids would be confused lol
Not just a white thin, it’s an asian thing too, but we use moms maiden name as middle name. Thanks to them my middle name rhymes with my last name like a cartoon character.
Dear Dave 125 – You are so right about us moms who give our kids our own last name as well as our husband’s (whoops! I mean partner’s!) last name. Some, like me, are BOTH bull dykes AND snippety scrawny feminists! And a little sympathy, please. You wouldn’t believe how hard it is for us to buy jeans, what with one hairy leg being a vegan size 0 and the other being a Manwich-eating size 42W.
Why are people so angry about others having 2 last names? I really dont understand how it affects them or how its their business anyway. Theres lots of cultures around the world that do this, how petty is it to dislike people or kids just because they have 2 last names.
BTW there seems to be some debate of whether Latin women give up their last names when they get married. I think this has to do with what country you come from. I know in Puerto Rico they used to add a “de ” a long long time ago, but it has not been done in a long time. I do know that in some countries of South America they still do this. And also Evita was Evita Duarte de Peron, not Evita Peron as I see her called in English.
Who needs 2 last names and whats the point of having 2 last names, One is enough, it doesn’t mean that if your kid doesnt carry ur last name that he or she is not biologically yours. Just stick to the tradition and lets only have one last name ppl.
“So why exactly are double-barrelled names so angst-provoking? If people want to recognise that their children have two parents, and reflect that status in the family-lineage portion of the child’s name, who exactly does that harm?”
As a child of this practice, I can say from experience that it has harmed me. My name only became hyphenated when I was an adolescent, but I never knew (was always under the assumption I had both last names) until I went to college and realized that my working class ass was not going to get any financial aid because my parents wanted to be liberal hippes.
Yay!
What about white people with 2 first names?
http://www.philliesnation.com
this is the gift that keeps on giving!
I thought it was Brazilia
White people are funny. Tiffany-Amber-Conrad-Westinghouse.
It probably happens because no one really cares what language you speak as long as you speak English.
Complete bullshit. Nobody gives double surnames to children; women who are not necessarily white but feminist, take 2 surnames to keep their maiden name after marriage.
You mention Spanish-speaking “culture”. And what race, do you reckon, Spanish people (as in from Spain) belong to?
F for the post.
[…] #22 Having Two Last Names […]
So, basically, you geniuses just prolonged by one generation the loss of somebody’s name. It was to happen some time. So now the big issue just becomes, who gets to have their name first? since the second one is the one that gets lost.
You know the funniest thing about this site? The real, implied but never spoken title is: Stuff White Liberals Like. This guy is basically making fun of white limosine liberals, which, deliciously enough, is exactly the people who delight in ironically sending these posts to their friends. Which is, well, ironic. It’s all so post modern I can’t stand it.
That’s wonderful. It will make the divorce so much easier on everybody when you decide to self-actualize in your mid-fifties. Just kidding. You folks are great. Keep up the good work.
I think you’re confusing “wish” with “think.”
Sorry, but I think you meant to write “you’re” where you wrote “your”.
Yes, why give your child more to type? Everyone knows we’re all lazy assholes like you. I mean…
Evrybody b typn liek u b4 long. Rite ppl?
[…] #22 Having Two Last Names […]
correction: “hispanics” who go to college become Latinos and then hyphenate their names in an effort to subvert the eurocentric patriarchy that truncated their identity. The ones who keep it really-real take on indian names.
Do you mean that he should learn to spell the word “jackass”, or that he is a jackass? By the way, did you notice that jackass is one word, not two?
Learn to spell and punctuate, jackass!
If she’s a posh child, she could be Alma Marcela Silva y Rico.
I know a set of brothers that have 2 different last names: one bears the mother’s, one bears the father’s.
Hyphenated surnames are not at all a recent phenomenon, although they were the realm of the aristocracy and petty gentry in times gone by.
What happens when two double-barrels marry? Well, the previous Duke of Norfolk was Miles Stapleton-Fitzalan-Howard. He married Anne Mary Teresa Constable-Maxwell. Their son, the current Duke, is Edward Fitzalan-Howard.
JAJAJA this composition is realy funny,
losely translated to english
when you eat her she whistles tastfully
when you eat her she whistles happily
My mum divorced my dad but kept his last name so we would have the same last name.
This generation is completely self-centered and egocentric.
well then, you must be white.
Pelé is Brazilian. Brazilians speak Portuguese.
And most Brazilians have the mother’s surname followed by the father’s surname (hispanic countries use the father’s surname followed by the mother’s). No hyphenations.
Most women, when they get married and if they adopt the husband’s name, will drop the mother’s surname, and use their father’s surname followed by the husband’s surname. And them their two surnames will be identical to their children’s surnames.
I pooped my pants
HAHA! You couldn’t have advertised your whiteness better than by mentioning Spanish names and then using a Portuguese-speaking Brazilian as an example. Bravo! And Phil, the capital of Brazil (since they spell it “Brasil” there) Is Brasilia, not Brazilia.
It is. Buenos Aires is the capital of Argentina.
I pity your child.
There’s a simple solution to the “multiplying last names” question: women keep the mother’s name when they marry, men keep the father’s name when they marry. that way, maternal and paternal lines are able to continue with equal fairness. So if Jane Smith and John Brown become Jane and John Smith-Brown, and they have two kids, Mary and Tom – let’s say Mary Smith-Brown marries Bill Jones – They become Smith-Jones. If Tom Smith-Brown marries Jennifer Clarke, they become Clarke-Brown.
If you have only sons or only daughters, then only one half of the family name gets passed down – but that’s what happens now, so at least this way it happens in both directions. And family lines would be much easier to trace this way – now they are only traceable paternally.
I’m always so impressed when I meet men who are proud and delighted to have hyphenated their name with their wife. Maybe that’s hopelessly “white” of me, but they always seem like particularly secure, confident, and cool guys.
This is why white people shouldn’t breed.
You should have asked about his field hockey jersey, ’cause that’s what he’ll be playing, along with all the other girls.
The other 75% are named Brittany.
Sorry your dads couldn’t get married.
Hmmm….Anderson…like Anderson Cooper…that dude’s as queer as a football bat.
It’s for credit purposes. If your name is “Betty M. Smith”, there will be 17 million of you and your credit will be confused with at least 10 million of them. If your name is “Ja’Betrina M’E’she’ealla Smith” chances are, there will just be the ONE of you and your credit will be your own. Ha.
Go buy some balls, LOL
It is ‘never mind’, ‘smart white guy’! *SMH*
I am so glad you guys brought up the subject of trendy/Waspy names….
I cannot stand
Madison
Caydan, Cayden
Jayden (girls and boys)
Sierra (lets name our kids after a wartorn place in Africa)
Tyler
Sailor
Taylor
Skyler
Spencer
Mackenzie
Kenzie
Michael for girls
Ryan for girls
Lucca
Miller
Miley
Dakota
Some douchebag I knew in high school married a 2-named girl and he instead hyphenated HIS name. Dude, Grown a pair!
Reeb-
You know you should respect him for his “awareness’ of his partner.
Someone please kill me now. please continue with your feminization of white culture, it makes it so much easier for us black men to get you white women. White men have so much guilt for being white because of you, I feel bad interacting with them, my friends who have hyphenated last names are 1) Always white 2) Usually make no decisions 3) Usually end up divorced.
As innocent as you thought this site to be or if it was nothing other than to get crap started….this kinda site is why our world is so split in unity today. You people who refer to whites, blacks, or whoever are the problem in this country. We are one. Who gives a shit about the color of our skin. How does the color of skin promote or denote the choice of names when deciding to use to last names. However, I will agree that the more country you are you will choose more of a redneck name and the more welfare you receive you will choose the most ghetto name! But their name means nothing to you or to me. Sometimes its about freedom of speech but this site promotes a line of difference between the human race. What is wrong with you people? Are you not sick enough of the schools getting shot up with your black and white friends, or the girl down the street from you being killed in a hit and run? Didn’t matter much what her name was, huh? Or what color she was. Does this economy not suck enough with all the problems from the government (high gas prices, shortage of fruits and vegetables due to gov’t paying farmers to not farm) . And all the devoted welfare applicants that can’t survive without you supporting them. You people have so much time to focus on bashing people for what they have named their children. Get a life. Make a difference and get the hell over it. Its not gonna matter about the four hyphenated last names when OUR children marry, but what will they eat, where will they work and live. And the worry of are they okay!! By the way, I am getting married and I have established a name for myself in the business that I am in. I will legally change my name to my husbands name, but for my job I will still use my maiden name along with my husbands, I was looking for information on the correct punctuation of using two last names. And this site is what I found. Unfortunately!!!!
“making a difference” is a really white thing to do along with “raising awareness. It really is your fault that you colonised the world and created the economy we live in now, oppressed every single type of other person OR ignored the oppression of every single type of person.
Sure the world is going to shit…but please save your ranting for dinner parties where you can eat your “sustainably” raised organic bison flank that you purchased from the Native American fellow at the farmers’ market. You can tell all your friends that he thought you were cool and smile that another race of people acknowledged you in a positive light.
I always find it ridiculous that people will go to a site, called, let’s say “STUFF WHITE PEOPLE LIKE” and then get all offended when it’s satirical based on race.
I knew a Tibbets and a Murray who became Tibray. This did not work with my husband and me – Baiger or Krugley – both sounded hideous. We just kept our own. My daughter got his last name; my brothers are passing on our last name.
I think identity politics get in the way of other issues that are more pressing for humanity.
Sierra often refers to the Sierra Nevada, in California, rather than Sierra Leone. I know some people who simply like the sound the syllables make together – and then the spelling of the name gets modified to Ciara and Seara and so on. Then I know people who continually make fun of other people’s choices, and by extension, the kids. Most of us don’t choose our own name – there is the name our parents gave us, and the name we make ourselves.
apparently you havent watched sports lately: Lorenzo Mata-Real, Chris Douglas-Roberts, Dominic Rogers-Cromartie, and Maurice Jones-Drew dont look very white too me – I think the stupid 2 last names thing is able to go across all races
you know whats even more white and hilarious? when white people actually combine two last names to create one super last name that is a sort of clusterfuck of the initial two!
I’m white and I don’t even like my middle name. In fact I hate my entire name.
From now on, I will go as Jack Striker. That’s a good name, isn’t it?
[…] David Sedaris#24 Wine#23 Microbreweries#22 Having Two Last Names#21 Writers Workshops#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture#19 Traveling#18 Awareness#17 Hating their […]
I think you mean “who are,” not “which is.” If you meant “people” in the singular, you want “which delights.”
I’m transsexual;* do I have to switch my last and middle names?
*for reals
What is a good name for the last name Gear and Routt?? plz help me out
My God, I popped myself reading Emily’s comments from Feb 16 about her crazy naming of her kid and the other comments back at her. This is craziness.
And this is her GOOD day ! LOL
I hate FemiMen. Get dem balls, boy !
The end of white men as we know it.
When I first saw this post, I thought they were talking about kids whose first name was also a last name. That is REALLY white.
Examples: Campbell Brown. Forrest Sawyer. Anderson Cooper. Emerson Lewis (hopefully never to meet Lewis Emerson).
Now, if they had two first names, that would be really East Indian-Anglican. I’ll never forget my good friend, George George. I used to call him George-squared. Come to think of it, I don’t think he agreed to be my friend.
wow- chill out
These sights are made for people to laugh and poke fun at themselves, not to make a cultural divide. The problem with the world today is people like you that are afraid to laugh and take everything way to seriousely. If everybody took a step back, chilled out, and laughed a little bit than this world would be a far better place. You are the type of mom that will put your kids in 15 different types of pads when putting her on the bike for the first time and won’t let her out of the driveway. Then doesn’t understand why she won’t leave home until 30 and is completely dependent. You are an overbearing ass that is the problem with the world. Chill out, laugh, make fun of yourself and for god sake don’t give your kid some horrible name that will give them more reason to hate your overbearing ass later in life.
I have a hyphenated name and my mommy is a nice lady!
To annoymous
thingwhitepeople like:Cocaine
thingswhitegirlslike:black men diks
thingsblackmenlike: white women and then calling their
racist
thingsarabslike: allah allah jihad
thingswhitepeople:demeaning other races because they
feel insecure and irrelevant in a world
thats moving past the white is rightness
1) Yeah, most of these are pretty irritating to me, too.
2) I also don’t like Aidan/Aaden/Aidin or whatever fucked-up spelling variation is currently believed to be original. That name sounds like a prescription drug.
3) We can be thankful that Chandler and Ross are no longer as popular among white people as they once were.
4) “Sailor”? Really? I think it’s a bad idea to name your kid after a particular trade, unless your last name is “Moon”.
Everyone who’s saying, “it’s a choice between her husband’s name and her father’s name,” don’t you see the sexism behind that comment? Why does the groom have his own surname, but the bride doesn’t?
If twin babies are born and named Mary Smith and John Smith, does the boy twin have his own last name but the girl twin has her father’s last name?
As for the debate about Latina women, both sides are right. Women used to drop their mother’s surname and add their husbands’ with the prefix “de”, but few do that anymore. Younger women keep their own names. Each parent passes on one of their two names and, under Spanish law, that child can pass on either of those names to their children. That’s also what happens when two hyphenated Americans marry: they choose which two of those names to pass on. I think the reason there’s so much anger is that a mature adult will probably choose to pass on the name of the parent that did the most to raise him/her, and that will usually be the mother.
Also, the financial aid post was obviously fake. Financial aid is based on tax returns, not your last name.
Er… wasn’t Pele Brazilian? Which would be Portugese, not Spanish…
In some Latin-American countries, if you come from U.S. and you become citizen, they will double your last name in your I.D. documents, e.g. John Smith will become: John Smith Smith (No Hyphen).
@ Jeff:
All of your “strong” used-to-be names, except for James, are nicknames for multisyllabic names: Matthew, Jonathan, Jeffery, William, Samuel, etc. Also Andrew is two syllables.
Also from “now”: Zachary could be Zack, and by your examples be a “strong” name, and Josh is one syllable (though also a nickname), so it’d go in the first category.
I personally think that fretting about the loss of masculinity fairly un-“masculine”.
You are the suck. And you are gay.
gay gay gay gay gay gay gayhess
score
Nigga pleaz!
It’s actually spelled “Brasília.”
Lord have mercy!!
Don’t forget the kids with two middle names!
You’ve got the ‘quirky celebrity-style something-different’ first name.
Followed by two middle names representing some old family member (gotta be fair to BOTH grandma’s)
Finished off with the hyphenated last name(s).
So we end up with…
Bluebell Agnes Marjorie Stephens-Bax!
“Stellar!”
Why would a woman choose her father-in-law’s surname over her own surname?
HILARIOUS…4 LAST NAMES WOULD BE THE CRAZIEST THING EVER! I KNO A GROUP OF 8 KIDS WHOSE MOM INSISTED ON THEM HAVING 2 LAST NAMES…8!
white people breed the best
No way! African American women (see, I’m a politically correct white person) are the ones who are obsessed with having two last names. This is one of the only ones I disagree with, but black women LOVE to have 2 last names, hyphenated and as long as possible…just to annoy me.
i.e. Judge Blackwell-Hatcher. Is that REALLY necessary?
Ok, I think I’ve got all the bases covered:
-My parents gave me a hyphendated last name (because they weren’t married! and it was the last 70’s).
-I honestly had a fear growing up that I would marry a man with a hyphenated last name. This seriously terrified me for years.
-Throughout my life my name has been misspelled or listed incorrectly, i.e. I’ll be listed under one last name and/or the other AND under both (this is how I got called for jury duty three times in one year).
-ON TOP OF THAT my parents didn’t give me a middle name.
So what did I do?
-When I got married I GLADLY took my husbands last name.
-But then, for shits and giggles, I made up my own middle name.
-And just to truly do some lame crap to our kids, we plan on giving them several middle names (see white person example Keifer William Frederick Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland).
PS Agree with the person who brought up using one parents last name as the baby’s first name (and the other as the last name). First big example was Miranda on Sex In The City naming her kid Brady Hobbes. I think more celebrities are doing this now.
I’m black and I know why white people have hyphenated names…they always have two parents.
[…] belong to, organic food, diversity, Barack Obama, tea, gifted children, awareness, traveling, having two last names, breakfast places, Apple products, sushi, art degrees, Japan, being the only person around, study […]
wow that’s very sensible!
First of all i want to apologize for my bad english in advance. I hope you’ll understand what i want to say anyways.
I don’t see what is so bad about a woman taking the name of her husband when she marries. People who opose that tradition usually say it is sexist and random and only that way because men dominated women because of physical reasons and all that. They basically are saying that if women would be the physically stronger gender, then men would have taken the name of their wifes in the past. But if you look at the beginnings of mankind and our eolution as a species, you see that it isn’t sexist and especially not random.
Look at the chimpansees.
Male chimpansees stay in the clan they were born into when reaching adulthood, to fight for a high rank in the hirarchy of their clan. Young females leave their clan to search for another one to join once they reach sexual maturity.
It has been the same with our still ape-like ancestors.
So the tradition of a woman changing her name to symbolize her becoming a part of her husband’s family is nothing else than the manifestation of a integrated biological principle in our nature and identity as a species.
It has nothing to do with men dominating women or any kind of unfairness, so there is no logical or credible emotional reason to change this tradition, other than being badly educated and misunderstanding it.
If we’d decent from elephants, lions or horses or any other species in which the young males leave their clans to search for a new one to join, then the tradition might very well be the other way around, but it isn’t.
But what if Tom Smith-Brown marries Liz Brown-Smith? Does it become Brown-Brown? Smith-Smith? Do the two fuse together, negating one of those, hopefully unrelated, names?
Or, like a chimera from the depths of a baby book nightmare, does it become Brown-Smith-Smith-Brown or the opposite? Personally, I’d just call the kid Inbred.
I have two last names ’cause mama is a hippie. I’ll figure out what to do about my kids when the time comes…It seems logical to give them two middle names (one original and one husband’s name) and give them my last name.
I say that when you get married, you should be required to make up an entirely new last name. that would solve everything.
yeah, but I think the point is we AREN’T chimpanzees
Some culture are patrilineal and trace heritage through the male, others are matrilineal and trace through the female. It has less to do with inheritence from chipanzees and more to do with culture.
British people seem to really be into the “two last names” thing. And for some reason the first one frequently seems to be “Rhys,” (as in Rhys-Lloyd, Rhys-Jones) even though I’ve never met anyone whose name was just “Rhys.” I don’t know where that comes from.
Well, keep marrying those really ugly, fat white women for us. You’re doing a service!
just as a side note…pele is not from a spanish-speaking culture, he is from brazil, which is a portugese-speaking culture.
I LOVE this site. I am as white as they come, a Republican, a Christian, and a married woman who took my husbands last name. I’m even a teacher. Let’s put a white picket fence around my house and call me June Cleaver. Obviously not every white person fits in every category listed on this site… but you have to admit there is some truth to it! I don’t care for soccer – but oddly enough, I have been caught sporting a scarf when the temperature was moderate out. Don’t take offense…. just enjoy it!
In Britain two last names indicates aristocracy so is to be avoided at all cost
I have two last names because I am white and follow the strict template guidelines set by my white peers, hence my two surnames are Apple and crumble.
Yes I’m being sarcastic.
Go eat a cock.
bastard
as long as your white women keep taking the ugly broke and crazy dudes for us. ex. seal, o.j.
oh and all the dudes that the white chicks take on maury or jerry. lol. the white girls always end up with the ugly ones
WHITE FOLKS LOoOOVE TO TAKE AN IDEA THAT’S NOT THEIRS. THEY LOVE TO BUMP REGGAE MUSIC AND SPORT THAT WHOLE ISLANDER STYLE. HOW EMBARRASSING. JUST STICK TO YOUR SCARVES AND SHORTS AND GET THE GOIN. IM CONVINCED THAT THE WHITE FOLKS IN SANTA BARBARA ARE GOING THROUGH IDENTITY CRISIS. IM SAD FOR THEM =(
Potato, potahto? Uh, patata. batata?
Does the kind of Stuff White People Like include things like
Truth, Equality, and Justice?
http://www.survival-international.org
Right on! That’s why I’m dropping all pretense and naming my future kids with the following convention:
[First] [Middle] [Confirmation] [Wifey’s Surname] Of the House of [My Hyphenated Surname]
Except for white celebrities.
Will anyone even see this comment so far down here?
that’s not true at all, it’s traditional in hispanic culture to have two names, but when you get married you drop one and take your husband’s then your children have your name and your husband’s name.
take me for example
My mom’s american, and my father’s brazilian. So my name is pretty much like this
American name | Unecessarily portuguese middle | american mom’s last name | South american dad’s uncessesarily portuguese last name.
so, for example, my name would be”
Joshua Horatio Mcguiness Guitierrez
Try that one on for size. My parents couldn’t agree to disagree, so they just decided to name me all of them.
FYI: None of those names are acutally mine. If my middle name had anything to do with the name “horatio”, I’d have shot myself ages ago.
oh yeah, I know the example has hispanic names in them, not portuguese. So shoot me.
Silva y Rico is actually the correct way; but in North America
it seems pretentious.
I don’t think that white people utilizing two last names is a new development. I believe that prior to the 20th century, people often gave their children a fisrt name, a middle name (that was actually their mother’s maiden name) and then their formal last name would be their father’s. I think this custom fell out of fashion with the modern era.
Also, women would commonly keep their maiden name in addition to taking their husband’s name (they didn’t hypenate it!) Take for instance Harriot Beecher Stowe, who wrote Uncle Tom’s Cabin in the 19th century.
–I love this blog!
I went out once with a guy whose name was Manuel Lopez Lopez!
Gabriel….what the hell?
I guess having two first names doesn’t count, eh?
William David Stephenson
NOT!!!
MEXICANS DO IT BETTER XP
Pelé is Brazilian! Brazilians don’t speak Spanish!
My mom didn’t, actually! She decided she didn’t want to marry so I have her maiden name. If I do get married I plan on keeping my last name too.
Who the fuck cares.
Hey Sleepy, take your head out of your ass, wake up, and look around.
Thank gawd we got that cleared up.
RACIST
Your not sorry, you’re an obnoxious ass.
No comment.
You just demonstrated that.
It is, and just as cruel as your parents where.
As if we didn’ t know. Gawd damn, shut up.
yup
There is a blog for offended people, You can do there. Have fun.
Wrong, I love it.
Aren’t you cleaver.
breathe the gas ….. hurry
Linda, you’re a bitch, a big fat ugly black bitch.
I particularly hate the name, Suzanna.
two words——fuck you
you are the 400th person to tell us that—read before writing.
Other cultures tried this, but it was confusing, because they didn’t know who the dad really was.
I am white.
And I think the two last names is retarted.
You have to be the dumbest bitch ever. I pity your family, your daughter, your husband, even your dog. When my kids are in school with yours, I will make sure they beat them up.
i seriously hate all of you
I hope you are trying to be funny. Retarted should be spelled retarded!
Some people are so lame.
I mean, I’m sure people of every race hyphenate
their names but I guess white people are more
into it.
“nicely, ‘whitely’ said” T___T
omg. Die.
I feel sorry for all the white people who lost their lives fighting for non-white people’s freedom…… I bet they feel pretty stupid right, being dead and having the people they fought for talking sh*t about them.
I’m sad for your parents sheila, for having you, such an ignorant child.
**************************
I’m having a son soon and he will be having my last name and my husband’s last name, because if he didnt have my last name, then my last name, my family’s name, would die with me. And I will not have my family forgotten.
Oh yeah, and I’m not white. Hummm, I wonder what that could mean?…
So if you are having a son soon and you are adding the maiden name to his last name to prevent your name from dying out (ashame mom and her sisters didn’t have more kids!) aren’t you merely forestalling the death of the name?
Or are you of the thinking that this son in turn would pass the name to his children if he had children?
lmao so so true my goodness man
My parents got in early on the hyphenation thing – 1972, baby!
But it’s not the soccer jerseys that really mess you up – it’s trying to do anything electronically, when internet forms won’t accept hyphens…
OMG! I’m oppressed too! 🙂
This would be annoying, at least to me. I know a girl who was named Jessie Morgan-Vaughn* in school. On people’s yearbooks and on other things that involve signing, she has to put ‘Jessie M-V’ so she wouldn’t take ten billion years to sign it.
*name changed, of course.
So I have a weird setup with my hyphenated last name because I actually don’t have a MIDDLE name. My parents decided that, in the event that I decided I wanted to have a normal last name, I could remove the hyphen and make Wright my middle name. I like being a hyphenate, though, so I’m just a guy with no middle initial.
As for the marrying-another-hyphenate issue, a hyphenate friend of mine had a pretty good solution. Either both parties or just their children each get one of the names. So if I married Jane Smith-Doe, the name would become Wright-Doe, Smith-Heuman, or something along those lines. You know, whatever sounds good.
Good call on pointing out the tradition of double last names in Spanish-speaking cultures, but using Pelé as an example doesn’t quite work, since he’s from Brazil – where they speak Portuguese.
From a genetic point of view it would make the most sense to have one name in the hyphen pair to follow the male blood line (the first one?) and one name in the follow the woman’s blood line (the second one?)
This way one name represents the Y chromosome, which is passed on unaffected from father to son, and the other name represents the mitochondria, which is past on from the mothers thru their daughters. Thus each side of the hyphenated name represents its respective haplogroup.
Because white people love genetics! It proves we are ever so slightly different than others, as in “Can you believe that R1b1b2 demographic? Holy cow!”
Well, you can call it “two first names” if you like, but that doesn’t make it true.
Oh, and guys who insist on having their middle name used in all cases are generally pretentious dicks.
We (hispanics) do take for ever to sign our names. Specially me, but our name structure isn’t as complicated as you make it seem.
*Name,Middle Name, Dad’s Surname, Mom’s Surname*
(Another thing we white people love, abbreviating and mnemonics, but that is another subject… Try abbreviating that.)
Hence my name, Carlota M. Wolff Castrodad
The real problem would be, mainly in Canada and regions where gay adoption is legal, when there are two daddies or two mommies…
Because when you get married, you become the man’s property.
There actually is a white historic precedent for double-barrel names. Its nothing to do with maternal and paternal lines.
In the UK, aristocrats always have two surnames, because they are of a place. so like, Lord Henry Onslow of Reading is different to Lord Henry Onslow of Onslow… hence Henry Onslow-Reading, etc. the only ones as far as I know who just Lord Onslow.
The reason people do it is nothing to do with sexism, though that may be their excuse… its that white people are all secret snobs and want to pretend they’re upper class when they’re NOT! 😛
ha ha ha you’re both so white!
my mom’s last name is hyphenated due to her degrees and such. my siblings and i just have our dad’s last name.
crisis averted.
in my experiences its always black people who have two last names. i think its somehow rellated to what they call having a baby mamma.
So Brazil is a Spanish-speaking country now…
[…] Having Two Last Names Fuck. Those fuckers gave me a hyphenated last name. How dare they! The white […]
Hey pendejo(a), Pelé’s name is Portuguese, not Spanish.
Ooooh, I hate this shit. THis white man once temped in an HR department. WTF are we supposed to do with you two-named people? Do you go under Alvarez, or Huang, Ms. Alvarez-Huang? MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MINDS.
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH WTF!!!!!!!!!
I’m tired of fuckinf Americans thinking in Brazil we speak Spanish. We speak PORTUGUESE!!!!!!!!!!!
How hard is it to understand that?
This blog should be named “Stuff stupid american people like”
Do people not realize the implications of this trend?
Two parents give birth to a baby, whom we’ll call Rachel Feldman-Goldberg.
Two and half decades pass and Rachel falls in love with a young man named Sean Kennedy-O’Sullivan.
They marry and produce a baby boy named David Feldman-Goldberg-Kennedy-O’Sullivan.
Where does the madness end?
I am Native American, Spanish…..but the fact is, who gives a sh*t what race I am. I want to hyphenate my name for the reasons:
1. I love my last name
2. My sons dad was a deadbeat, so he has my last name
3. I want more kids, therefore mommy would have both of their last names
2 last names for me
1 last name for my kids and husband
If I got divorced I would go back to my last name
IT’S A PERSONAL CHOICE!!!!!!!!
I agree & it’s also those women who marry & hyphenate; that is so fucking annoying! Pick one name & get over yourself.
Um, David is a middle name you dumbfuck.
I feel sorry for you & your parents. Please change your name.
rock on amigo.
There is nothing wrong by using your 2 last names. Its a way to legally distinguish you from a criminal. When a person has a common name and last name for example: John Johnson or Jose Rodriguez and the person get’s in trouble, the law goes on a witch hunt looking for every single person that shares the same name, so it can bocome an inconvinience just to have one last name.
Another note: “PELE” is just a nick name so it doesn’t matter if its portuquese or spanish, this person was just making a point.
Finally, when two persons use both last names and marry, the wife uses her fathers last name and adds her husbands last name with a hyphen. Their kids get the parents first last name of course starting with the fathers last name then their mother’s as simple as that.
Please folks, think of your children. I grew up hyphenated and it’s a bureaucratic nightmare. I mean it’s one thing if you’re proud of your heritage and all, but when you really don’t talk to any of your relatives (politics and religion got in the way of that…) then I’m not exactly sure what we’re celebrating. Here’s an idea: why do I have this useless middle name? That could have been mom’s last name sans hyphen. Or mom’s favorite color. Or whatever. But hyphenation is just poor branding—failure of imagination. And it leads to ugly situations when you’re 26 and suddenly you have to tell mom that you went to court today to legally remove her name from your own so that you could finally use e-ticket systems at the airport instead of having to wait in line to explain to a ticket agent that you are in fact only one person, not a lesbian couple as your name suggests.
Just a thought! Do what you will. Oh, and in Australia they call ’em “double-barreled” names, which sounds so much cooler.
Oh please, having two last names is a pain in the but people. Seriously, save your child some time. Do you know how hard it is to fill out forms and crap? I understand a women getting married and keeping her maiden name with her new husbands last name. But don’t pass that hyphenation onto the kid. Before you know it children of the future will have thirty last names. I get culture and traditions and feminism. But it still bugs me. Do you know how hard it is to fill out on a form:
Erica Christopolous – Groskiewczyk, not to mention when i have to add my middle name. For pity’s sake just give your child part of the hyphenation as their middle name.
Hey asshole,
Pelé is brazilian and Brazil is NOT a spanish speaking culture! Brazilians speak portuguese and are NOT hispanics. There’s a big difference between spanish and portuguese, although they might sometimes sound similar, since they both are idioms originated from ancient ROMAN LATIN.
Learn the facts before posting! Asshole!
Actually I have a friend who had a hyphenated last name, got married and added a third hyphened last name…but she says the kids will just have the singular last name of their father.
It’s amazing how intense people are about things that have no affect on them at all!
I have two last names and I see no problem with it. When I got married for the second time, I hyphenated my previously married name with my newly married name. My purpose for doing so was not to raise the ire of small minded folks like some of the people here, but to ease potential complications.
My son has his biological father’s/my 1st husband’s name. When dealing with schools, insurance companies, doctors, etc., it is much easier to see the connection (and not get the run around, lose information, etc.) when I communicate and have both last names.
Another reason for my going hyphenated as for work reasons as well. Having been in my organization for a few years before I got married for the second time, I felt there would be more continuity and less confusion if I hyphenated my name.
These are my personal reasons for doing it. If you don’t like it, you need to get over yourself. It has no effect on you nor does it have anything to do with you.
Ha! Erica, you made me laugh, even though I know it’s not funny and I see how much of a PITA it must be with that long a last name(s)! Shite, I thought mine was rather long… and to top it off, I’m sure you have to repeat the complicated Greek/Polish spelling several times before English-speaking people get it right!
And I’m tired of everyone in the world thinking that all Americans are stupid. I’m well aware that Brazil is a Portuguese-speaking country 🙂
And anyway, Gabrielio, he’s not American. He’s Canadian.
http://www.heebmagazine.com/blog/view/588
I think it’s stupid for *anyone* to assume things, don’t you?
Well, Paul–and with that name I’m assuming you are not, in fact, a woman–as clever as you think you are with that observation, I think this concept is great. What are you insinuating with that comment?
It’s like saying “Men think they’re so tough, but they’ve all come out from inside a *woman* as a squealing, drooling dependents! Haha! It’s not a pissing match of the sexes, for Chrissake, but I guess you’d never be in the position of having to give up *your* family name and having it omitted from your children’s names. Being, y’know, a *man* and all…..
Yes, my last name is my father’s (whom I love dearly) and is part of my family’s history…but now it’s *mine*. My mother was raised in a time when all women were expected to do was cook, clean, and vacuum while smiling and wearing pearls ‘a la Donna Reed. I, however, was not. I’m a professional (M.D.) and plan to keep my name at work, but I plan to be Mrs. (____) to the neighborhood kids.
My kids might have hyphenated last names, but only if I marry a man with a monosyllabic last name or something that fits mellifluously with mine. I wouldn’t want my kids to have awkward-sounding polysyllabic surnames. And you know what? I like that I have that choice. 🙂
Yeaaaahh! Case closed! Thanks, Jim.
Jim. You’re a man, right? So assuming your last name is A$$hole, because your family name and proud heritage would never be expected to be cut out of your lineage, you’d be the patriarch of a whole line of A$$holes!
Geez…that must’ve sucked! I’d just have the kids call me Mrs. S. 🙂
We care. Really.
I love how Someone likes to finish all of their comments with “Asshole!” Which I assume is intended to solidify Someone’s intellectual superiority over the rest of us?
Toby, you just made my night! You’re freakin hilarious! Poor mama’s name!
So your white and have two last names? Thanks for confirming this article
Your new husband is a pussy for letting you keep your ex’s last name. Easing complications? Bullshit – you’re a bitch who keeps her husband’s balls in a little glass jar on the end of your keychain. Keeping your own last name, ok – the ex’s? Give me a break.
I am also married for the second time (after being WIDOWED), and I do not have any issue with dealing with issues surrounding my children, who have my first husband’s last name, while I have my maiden name hyphenated with my second husband’s name.
You are just a selfish controlling beast who is lording it over some poor pathetic sap who didn’t realize what a nightmare he was getting into.
How many times was your mother divorced? That is a good indicator of some women who use the hyphenated last name. Ole mom got tired changing names. Or, could not convince new dad to adopt her brood.
It also reminds me of someone who just mist growing up white trash, and had a lot of kin that were.
Chill out “two last names”! Obviously you have never worked at Data Entry! Seriously, if you can get that pissed off about a list with over 100 items you have little sense of humor…is that on the list….?
yeah i think the children are the main victim here. I would not like to have a 25 letter last name as a kid. But if I lived in Australia my opinion would change for sure.
Hey i have two last names and its not because my mom thought it was sexist to take on my dad last name it is because my parents werent married when i was born . I like my last name but not i will not add a third name to my lastname when i get married, but then my name will die off since i am a girl and the only person in the world with my name.
I grew up having a hypenated last name. I can say with out a doubt it is the stupidest, most pointless and confusing thing to do.
Seriously any parent who does this is out to lunch.
If your wife wants to hyphenate her own last name thats cool but if she wants to do it to your kids. PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN. Your unborn children will thank you!
I love having a hyphenated last name.
this is funny.
Bravo!
It is evident from even a cursory inspection of this article that it is meant to be a jest, and not a serious commentary on people with hyphenated last names. The ignorance of the people who are angered by this is also evident. Come on. It’s so obvious that this site is a joke. Although many of the observations (especially the one about marijuana) are right. But that’s besides the point. Which is that this is a humor site, not a hate site. If you want a hate site, I suggest you visit my “friends” at http://www.kkk.com/ Notice the quotes, because I am not friends with any KKK members. Enjoy this post meant entirely in jest and as a commentary on your ignorance 🙂
Or you could let your wife decide, seeing as she’s the one who’s been knocked up for 9 months and has to pop out a baby.
Um, I have a hyphenated last name because I’m Latin American and its the only way that bureaucratically we could follow that practice in North America. So it really isn’t a white person thing. Full disclaimer, I’m fairly phenotypically white-looking but am Latin American.
This is nonsense. The only people with hyphenated/double-barrelled last names are a) the upper class/aristocratic Europeans and b) ghetto blacks.
(I’m aware that Spanish/Hispanic people use both their mother and father’s last names, but they don’t use a hyphen to connect the two names).
Is this all that white people like? Sounds kind of boring…
David Hammond is either an idiot or has never met a black person because a black person with a hyphenated name in the ghetto is about as likely as a chief of surgery living in a $25/month HUD home.
Totally wrong on this issue… Yeah, a very FEW who are celebrities or politicians…. that’s about all… and many, many with these stupid names who aren’t white.
You just hate white people and have to fabricate this items to build this retarded list.
Funny how I work in a Pharmacy and most the people with hyphenated last names are black!
You realize the person who wrote this is white, right? God, you are stupid.
He’s just trolling, he indignantly protests “this isn’t true!” in every entry.
It’s a Hispanic custom! You keep both your parents’ last names. Wives also use both their husbands’ and maiden names.
White people who hyphenate are pretentious. Pick one name and stick with it.
I don’t care if it’s retarded. It’s hilarious!
I’m obviously not hispanic from my name, but i had two last names but my mom dropped the hyphen so now i have two middle names.
OMG! This site proves it! I hate 98% of the 107 things. I’m not even upset that I had to change my name to Latrina. How am I going to break it to my Caucasian parents that I’m not white?
We used to have a saying whereas any girl/lady/woman who hyphenated their last name was a bitch. Funny shit dude!!!
what happends when you are not married
it is also annoying when we (yes I’m white) name kids with last names, or worse, when we don’t even realize we have done this. for example, connor, mitchell, morgan, hunter, tucker and brady are NOT first names! these parents are really annoying and they should not be allowed to name their own children. madison, mackenzie, jordan, and riley are NOT first names!
yeah….Connor, Mitchell, Hunter, Tucker et al may not be first names but if we don’t pull them out once in a while we end up with a lot of people with boring-ass names. Like “Pat”.
I just want to add that Pele is brazilian, so he comes from a portuguese-speaking culture. The problem is that if white people try to make nicknames, they end up sounding like wannabes.
White people also like to have two last names if they have a Spanish(still white)mother or have a Latino husband. I can’t tell you the number of scholars and professors out there with names like Janet Davis-Castro, Janna Anderson-Echeverria, Brittney Jenkins-Hinojosa, Sarah Shapiro-De La Cruz, Ashley O’Malley-Encarcion, Carolyn Reeves-Morales, etc.
As Austin correctly pointed out, Pele is Brazilian, and his Spanish is worse than my Japanese.
So there it comes another thing white people like (including those metaliguistical-smartass-ironic-bloggers): white people like to sound cosmopolitan and quote or comment on foreign cultures even if they don’t have a clue about the countries or cultures they are quoting or commenting on (as a matter of fact, they don’t give a fuck about Brazil, Angola or Spanish speaking countries, for, as far as they know, there are no white people there, and thus, probably, nobody intelligent enough to dig their juvenile jokes).
Another good example is for example a girl that his dad’s last name is Varela and her mother last name, her full name will be:
Tecla Varela Vergara.
i wanted to hyphenate my last name when i got married and my husband said NO WAY. so i just kept my last name LMAO im a bitch. i’m going to change it soon, i just really DONT want to go to the DMV.
Exactly. You’re just not important enough (99.99999% of the time [white person statistics]) to need to exhibit your last names.
yep, this site pretty much covers it. white people are boring. black people on the other hand, now that’s entertainment. they have natural rhythm you know.
Yeah, and the husband has to take care of it and the wife most of the time.
Nobody cares about your second or first last name.
Pelé is from Brasil. Brasil is not a “Spanish-speaking culture”. Get your facts…
Are you freaking kidding me?? I’m certain the point was not the country of origin of Pele. See through the literalism and appreciate the joke, idiot.
Besides, you all look and talk the same to white people… Now, get offline and empty my trash.
Admitting you’re a bitch doesn’t make it ok to be a bitch… While you’re out at the DMV, do your husband a favor and pick up some divorce papers so he can get rid of your sorry ass.
Whatever… White people care about Brazil. Brazilian chicks make the best porno, and capoeira is the coolest fucking thing ever.
Well, PAT… Not sure what your issue is. I’m guessing you got your pasty white ass kicked on a daily basis by a bully named Tanner, so you take serious issues with surname last names. Hire a good shrink and start down the road to healing…
Hyphen women are the ultimate cop-outs who want to have their cake and eat it, too. Make a commitment and do one of three things:
1. Take your husband’s name
2. Keep your maiden name
3. Have your husband take YOUR name, after removing his testicles.
That is absolutely true – in fact, if people will keep this double-name thing going, we’ll have an exponential growth of family names In fact, in 8 generations each white person will have 256 last names :-)…
Yep, we women sure are a bunch of fragile little damsels in distress. We need Prince Charming to rescue us from being offended by wicked naming customs.
– Ms. Motycka-Yakos-Sukup-Fuchs-Edwards-Roddey-Cousar-McElwee-Galloway-Haninger-Downing-Tudor-Beaupenny-Plantagenet-FitzRoy-Sinclair-Bell-St. John-Hyatt-Thomas-Le Despencer-Hutchinson-Seymour-Hungerford-Blewett-Klein-Hael-Boleyn-Chambers-Kulp-Gwilym-Beaumont-de la Pole-Montagu-Beauchamp-Newman-Charlemagne-Blount-Radcliffe-McMalcolm-Lawrence-Brown-Millen-Babb-Purcell-Ruffin-Mowbray-FitzRobert-d’Angouleme-Braybrooke-Hastings-Exum-de Courtenay-Dafydd-Apllewelyn-Something
Tatoca’s point wasn’t that Brasil was the “country of origin of Pele”. It was that Brasilians speak Portuguese. And you should probably look up the word literalism.
If your going to tell people to empty your trash you should stop being trash, honey.
Hey Spanish Pele, have you admitted you’re a bitch?
Native Spaniards consider themselves white. They are European, and often get pretty offended when people consider them otherwise. I’m pretty sure Spain is a Spanish-speaking country.
So you get YOUR facts straight before you get all high-and-mighty on everyone. The tone of this blog is playful and tongue-in-cheek. As a white person, I agree with a lot of the “stuff” described and enjoy laughing at it. Let’s not ruin some good-natured fun by pointing the racial finger at people maliciously.
Ha! I’ve seen a lot of four-year-olds who looked like they dressed themselves! Then the kid turns out to be a binge drinking whore her first year in college because her parents thought that giving her any kind of discipline would hurt her self-esteem.
What planet do you live on Eugene? People give double surnames to their children often enough. As for “Spanish-speaking culture”, it doesn’t refer to Spain in particularly. What the hell are you talking about?
Amen!
It is hopelessly white of you in case you were wondering
Gabriel, you may be white.
Ha, ha. I hyphened my last name when I got married, it’s true, and I regret it everyday–shoulda kept my own name, period. But paying to have it taken off will just look hostile to my in-laws, so I’m stuck with it now.
What’s in a name? That which we call a “rose” by any other word would smell as sweet.
I took my husband’s name. I never thought twice about giving up my last name. Having the same last name says “There is no seperation, I am you, you are me”.
I am old fashioned, I guess.
don’t know if this has been mentioned already, but Pele is Brazilian, and hence Portuguese rather than Spanish-speaking
LOL Skink I was just about to say that.
Are you Aussie btw? I’d never heard of skinks until I moved to Sydney.
Yes, two last names for me! That’s because I come from a Spanish speaking culture. Unlike PELE, who is Brazilian. You are aware that they speak PORTUGUESE in Brazil, don’t you?
yeah i have two because i come from spanish culture and that is how it is down in that kind of place! <3(heart)
i thought this was a hispanic thing. i don’t know any white people with 2 last names.
i have two last names because my parents (my mother in particular) enjoy being so white
I sense alot of sarcasm on this site. What’s the matter white people? Can’t handle a little teasing? Awww.
Tease all you want…we still own everything.
Divorce papers from the DMV? That’s pretty funny.
Maybe it’s his second hyphenated last name??
Too true!!
Yeah… what are you going to say? “Ha ha, you have historically dominated us in all areas”
Why? Intimidated by a little independence?
This is so Hispanic…please…not many white people have 2 last names
Having two last names is a common practice in lots of cultures. Both sides of my family come from cultures which do this (albit in different capacities). Then the kid marries another person with two last names, and they use a combination of both grandfather’s last names… and so on. When a woman marries, traditionally her mother’s last name becomes her middle name, her father’s last name becomes her second last name, and her husband’s last name becomes her new last name. Whew. It sounds way more confusing than it actually is.
You own everything relative to what? If you would care to take your myopic perspective off of the United States of America for a second, you will find that the vast majority of the planet is yellow… then dark brown. I don’t know nuthin’ bout no world domination or “owning everything” but I do know from childhood that when you mix a batch of Neopolatin ice cream up, it ends up looking rather chocolate.
White people are on the way out, especially since you are internally torn about giving away the country to Mexican illegals and standing your ground… You may be sitting pretty now, but, very soon you are the ones who are going to need Affirmative Action.
I actually think combining names is a buch of bs. that’s my 2 cents worth.
LOL. agreed
could i see an example of that?
first of all using the term “white people” is very racist. i can’t believe you would post something like that up on the internet. and secondly giving a child two last names isn’t b.s. just because you wouldn’t do it doesn’t mean you should judge. many people i know who have done this do it because they have a child out of wed-lock. the child shouldn’t always get the father’s last name, it’s just that our culture carries it out that way. if i was married i would give my child the husband’s last name as well as myself because i don’t mind taking his last name. if i was a man i would want it the same way for me. but i’m not married and i’m having a child. I’m the one whose going to be mainly supporting her and i don’t think it’s fair that as the main caregiver she can’t have my last name too. my daughter will have a hyphenated last name because it will make things easier for both of the parents. when i have to pick her up from school or if my parents needed to because i was unable to and her father couldn’t having the hyphenated last names makes it easier to get her. you should respect the choices one makes and not be so critical because it isn’t your decision.
first of all using the term “white people” is very racist. i can’t believe you would post something like that up on the internet. and secondly giving a child two last names isn’t b.s. just because you wouldn’t do it doesn’t mean you should judge. many people i know who have done this do it because they have a child out of wed-lock. the child shouldn’t always get the father’s last name, it’s just that our culture carries it out that way. if i was married i would give my child the husband’s last name as well as myself because i don’t mind taking his last name. if i was a man i would want it the same way for me. but i’m not married and i’m having a child. I’m the one whose going to be mainly supporting her and i don’t think it’s fair that as the main caregiver she can’t have my last name too. my daughter will have a hyphenated last name because it will make things easier for both of the parents. when i have to pick her up from school or if my parents needed to because i was unable to and her father couldn’t, having the hyphenated last names makes it easier to get her. you should respect the choices one makes and not be so critical because it isn’t your decision.
Christ on a bike….. When you were made did they forget to include your sense of humour?!?!?
you are annoying
Hahaha .. yeah everyone should refrain from making references to “white people” and their culture in mainstream society, it’s unacceptable.
Right..
Anyhoo, Pele is Brazilian where the language is Portuguese not Spanish. Aaaaaannnnd I just fulfilled Thing That White People Like # 1,909454, correcting others on trivialities that don’t matter in a high-handed yet neutral fashion, in order to rectify the mistake and simultaneously demonstrate their superior knowledge but without appearing condescending, for fear of offending anyone. Heh. I rule.
Have to say this is incorrect. Black people made two names popular (see Jada Pinkett-smith and David allen-greer).
Er, I have three but I go by just one of them, but being British and Upper Middle Class absolves me somewhat I fancy.
the only time i see someone with two last names is a black person, hell sometimes its either the first or middle…all ethics have some fucking weird ass person like that..and the only time i seen a white person with more than one last name is their maiden name.
um… Christian Lander IS white. How is using the term “white people” racist?
I have 2 last names as everyone in my country. Some people have 3 of them!
we are the whitest!
And having moms last name havent done anything to make women more participant on public life…
CHRIST ON A BIKE?!!!
NOW THATS SOME WHITE SH!T RIGHT THERE….
I AGREE
wow
What about those of us with double-barrelled first names? The one thing I am grateful to the Olson twins for is that Mary-Kate made it not so odd to have 2 first names again. It’s like having a split personality – I can change at will – sometimes I use the first half of my name, sometimes the second, sometimes I’ll be hyphenated, and sometimes I’ll just stick it all together and wait for the interesting pronunciations (even though each name read separately is quite easy to pronounce).
I remember when the world went computer and forced me to limit my name to letters only, since many ‘forms’ would not allow for a non-letter to be used in a name category.
Eventually I married my English husband and moved to the land where double-last names are considered ‘posh’ (upper-class), the United Kingdom. Here the practice of double last names has been going on for generations; I think it started from the desire to keep a family name alive when the male lines died out. There is a bit of snobbery attached to it here and you can occasionally here people talk about having a ‘proper hyphenated name’ – meaning their hyphenated name has been passed down through generations due to an ‘important’ lineage rather than a personal choice.
I did have quite a few laughs with my husband about hyphenating my last name after I got married and becoming a ‘double-hyphen’ (both first and last names hyphenated). We may be on the verge of witnessing the start of the next big ‘white’ trend, double and even triple hyphened names. Adding a hyphenated middle name could become the mark of true ‘whitness’ some day.
Eh Pele wasn’t spanish,he was brazilian.
This comment is the biggest slam I have read in a long time. NICE! I love it.
Maybe. I probably should’ve said “the people which” because i was referring to a class of people. I dunno. But you are definitely white. You probably snottily point out to your friends when the end a sentence in a preposition or fail to use the subjunctive tense. And I’m guessing you do this because it’s an easy way to look smart even if you’re not. Kind of like going to college but majoring in political science.
The great thing about being white is that you don’t have to waste your time being offended about racism. It really saves us a lot of time. Which we use to get jobs.
Oh please, with this one.
What’s with blacks and these “africanized” names.
or made up names?
Deshawn?
Funniest one was a black lady that had twins;
Lemonjello
Oranjello
after her two favorite foods: Lemon Jello & Orange Jello
True story.
o f*ck I know two kids with those names – are they from evanston?
hahaha…I was talking about that phenomenon with some friends and some lady was like “yes, they just come up with these beautifully musical names…” and all it took was the mentioning of a girl named ‘Clamidia’ to cut her pc tirade to a halt.
no sweetie we are only pointing out the dumb shit white people name their kids. for instance kadie, kayde, katie, amy, becy,becca, racheal,sarah(my fav),sue, ellen,mary,ann,jessica,maggie,beth, are you guys tring to be clones? how about this one I know a woman named Cullen Bailey- Burnes pretty dumb name. Do not give your kid a stupid name like black people name ,your kid after everyone elses kid in your neighborhood-hello my name is Katie Amy Becky Racheal Sarah Sue Ellen Mary Ann Jessica Maggie Beth Bailey Burnes.
amen
I’d rather have a “common” name than a name that no one else can pronounce, or a name that will keep me from getting a job because no one wants to hire Shaniqualikalishanaynay Boo Precious Junior. Or Blackquesha. Also, I have never seen anyone named Kadie or Kayde. And you spelled “Becky” wrong.
Let them have their opinion, they let you have yours.
O relax, this is very true for the majoority of white women. All the white girls that i have dated are hardcore believers in this crap. In response to what you said about black names, that is also very true for the majority of black people. “Why so serious?!?”
Hey, Pele is not from a Spanish speaking culture, just so you know. You should do your research before opening your mouth.
What does this topic have to do with being white??? As usual, your patent ignorance is on display in full Technicolor. And hey! Jack-off! What are you insinuating here? That only white children have parents who are married to each other? I guess all the non-white children bastards, huh?
White people love pointing out how other white people are being racist though it has no merit and all accusations are totally fabricated. Note: telling a white person that you appreciate them standing up for “what’s right” will always make them feel better.
Seriously, one of the most truthful and funniest things i have ever read. I am from a family with two last names and upon asking my matriarch, i discovered the reason for my last name including a hyphen and 15 characters was because she felt it was unfair and then went on to complain about some other white woman feminist bullshit. You hit it perfectly and anyone who disagrees is a feminist who needs to get with the times and stop acting like such a bitch. I would be elated to find that you have written, or are in the process of writing, a book about stuff women like, but is still completely ridiculous. Is it possible?
Also, you are a true American. Keep up the good work!
YEAH, I SPELLED BECKI WRONG. NOW ONLY 5 MILLION WHITE GIRLS WILL BE OFFENED INSTEAD OF 10. KEEEP BEING COMMON WHITE PEOPLE. I WILL START MY OWN WEBSITE: STUPID SHIT WHITE PEOPLE DO THAT THEY DONT SEE AS STUPID BECAUSE IT’S ORDINARY AND COMMON. YOU SPELLED “BLACK KEISHA” WRONG PICLKE DICK. SEE, I CORRECTED YOU NOW THAT MAKES ME SUPERIOR.
pS- TOM CRUISE’S WIFE KADIE HOLMES
YOU DONT KNOW ANYONE NAMED KADIE,YET YOU KNOW SOMEONE NAMED Shaniqualikalishanaynay Boo Precious Junior? ARE THE NAMES COMMON OR LACKING CREATIVITY? NAMES ARE MENT TO BE PERSONILIZED. I AM BLACK, MY DAUGHTERS NAMES ARE KYRA AND KYLA-MAKING FUN OF SOMEONE FOR TRYING TO HOLD ON TO THEIR RAPED HERITAGE IS PRETTY LOW. THIS IS A WEBSITE TO MAKE FUN OF WHITE PEOPLE RIGHT,OR AM I IN THE WRONG PLACE?
[…] Now, obviously, Christophe and Sydney are no more responsible for their names than I am for mine. My point here is not to mock them, or even to mock their parents. I am really curious about the sociology behind hyphenated last names (surely this would make a great entry for Stuff Williams People Like) and the likely future evolution of the trend. What happens when such Ephs get married? I am honestly curious. And, yes, this is Stuff Williams People Like. […]
Woaaah…chill the fuck out…and get over yourself. A name is a name is a name…who cares what white people or black people name their kids? BTW, I like my “dumb shit” name Sarah…and whatever you name your kids is fine too…but I don’t understand why you have to be so damn hateful…
as i stated in my last point this is a website to poke fun at white people. somehow black people are the one’s i read about on this website.Black people do not have a problem with making light of our diffrences,but white people obviously do.This is what angers me. I find it halarious when someone names their kid somehting weird. I find it equaly halarious when I have to hear the attendence read: Becky A. Becky C. Becky B. Becky D.- New website funny shit white people do that they should light up and laugh at yourself-one thing that should be on this list that I could spend all day blogging on is #1 thing white people like TANNING-or what I like to call fake bake
What are you talking about?
I have noticed the name thing as well. I have also noticed that if you are REALLY White; like if you like in Minnesota or Wisconsin your name ends in a tree. I find this true especially with the ‘Sota Crackers and Cheeseheads.
While it is true that Pele is not from a Spanish culture, the naming system is the same in Brazil.
Hey! I just unintentionally exemplified #20–being an expert in YOUR culture. Sweet! I think i just felt myself get lighter.
I’m not intimidated by a woman being independent but I was pretty pissed off when my ex wanted to hyphenate our son’s last name. It would have been a stupid sounding last name bordering on rediculous and about 25 letters long. My last name is fine. her last name is fine, together they would not go no matter who’s name was first. Plus, she picked the first name and the middle name which I had absolutely no say in. He was given my last name at birth and if I hadn’t stood up for myself and my son he would have only the names she gave him or an absolutely retarded looking last name or my name would not appear anywhere in his life except on the support payment cheques. I think a lot of women think that being independent means never having to compromise, never admitting when they are wrong and controlling everything, everyewhere, every time and never having to answer for their mistakes.
I’m pretty sure he’s Canadian.
while i dont agree with the whole tree thing… im from wis and def dont have a tree name… the double name thing is so right no. hahaha!! shout out to women… YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OWN IDENTITY WITH YOUR HUSBANDS LAST NAME!! haha. doesnt make you a feminist to refuse his name… just makes us look like bitches most of the time.
agreed 2 last names is too gay! i would never be the bitch in some relationship and have my kid take my bitches name! hell no sir my son will have 1 last name
Wow, I would never want to be your girlfriend. You sound like you’re 12 years old watching too much shitty rap music on mtv! hahaha!
In all honesty, I have two last names because my parents never married, and they gave me the option to have just one about a year ago. And I don’t meet many people with two last names.
Whats the purpose in changing my name? I intend to keep my name the same after I marry. I am who I am, it has nothing to do with feminism and if you insecure pricks can’t handle a woman not wanting your name then you seriously have some deep seeded issues with your manhood. I mean I guess in times when women are not only out-earning their spouses but also graduating college at a much higher rate, I could maybe understand the insecurity with the manhood thing..
It’s not what they call ya that matters…it’s what you answer to (WC Fields)…and….Wise is the man who knows his own father…(Bud Hawley)
Wise is the man who knows his own father (Bud Hawley) and It’s not what they call ya that matters…it’s what ya answer to..(WC Fields)
I love the part about the jerseys. It’s so true.
I’m totally with you, but why do you say it has nothing to do with feminism? It has everything to do with feminism. .
My fiance and I are doing exactly this: hyphenating our last names and passing them on to our children. We hope our daughters will choose to keep their maternal last name and add their husbands’ last name, and that our sons will keep their paternal last name and add their wives’ last name. It’s really not all that complicated. The change allows us to keep our identities, show that we’re creating a new family, and track our lineage. I don’t think we can ever have an equal society until we treat men and women equally.
I am soooo guilty of this. My new baby’s name is very long. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen a name take up TWO lines on a social security card! LOL!
Is there something wrong with feminism?
Again, seeing as how Spanish people (from Spain, at least) are white, we can blame the phenomenon solely on white people :]
So what happens when these kids grow up and have their own kids. Will their kids have 4 last names?
Someone answer me!!!
Different rules for girls and boys. Jane Smith marries Joe Jones, and they become Jane and Joe Smith-Jones. Their daughters carry on her last name, and their sons carry on his.
Ex. Daughter Karen Smith-Jones marries Kevin Rodriques-Llamas, and they become Karen and Kevin Smith-Llamas.
Son Richard Smith-Jones marries Amy Williams-Perry, and they become Richard and Amy Williams-Jones.
It’s really not that complicated.
i am black
im blAck
i like that i can express my feelings towards this website. the fact that im black is a great thing that your accepting me and not being discrimnated against myself.
do yew’s kno whu i be? i love to suck, rub, moan.
i hate dem skinny white beyaches
I luv Deondre, uma beat Chyna fa goin wif ma man!! he need to pay child support on time!! y do he aleayz do dis to meh? he kno he want it!! so Chyna, Chayla, Mariland, Alexis T, Alexus, Rayven, Jalae, dem twins Jade and Jasmine and many mo.
apparently my mom was white beyond her years. I got both of my parents names in ’88 (when i was born) and its a huge pain. neither name is very easy to pronounce or spell or even hear (always always always have to repeat my name). its awful. Often times the ‘last name’ line isn’t long enough and god help me if i have to bubble in my name. No child of mine will ever have 4 last names or even two for that matter. They will probably have my mothers last name (she raised me by herself). If their mother cares that much they can have her name. Women may think its an equality thing, but in reality nobody cares where your name came from, just make it simple. Dont do that to your kid, im begging you!
really? It’s a joke.
Pretty cool blog!
Further fun point on last names: the last names are in any case the fathers’ names, so you’re still being sexist to your mother. Which makes for fun times galore.
This is a wonderful way to end the work week, perusing this web site. I find the joviality of the comments range from enjoyable to bombastic.
I think it’s cooler to not actually know who your father is, this way, he could be anybody. I wonder how many kids are going to grow up believing they are Barack’s love children rather then the child of one of Daryl’s gang, or possibly Jimmy’s gang, or… how many people was I with that night?
I agree. 🙂 I have passed it on to all people I know who have a decent sense of humor.
Sometimes the joviality of the comments becomes pretty martial.
I have never met a woman who has a hyphenated last name who wasnt a total B. The two last name thing says soooo much about their personality – humorless, anal, controlling, type-a. Men – if your lady wants a hypenated last name run, don’t walk, as far as you can away from this chick.
Actually, that’s just crap and you are obviously a sexist. I have two last names, because I was adopted at 8 years old. I spent the first eight years of my life in and out of court for custody battles. It took me eight years to have a last name I was proud of, and when I got married, I didn’t want to give that up. It’s a huge part of who I am and since I went through hell to get that last name, I wasn’t about to drop it altogether. So the next time you want to classify all women as bitches, maybe you should use your obviously-superior intellect and come up with a better line.
Jen, you sound like a total B**ch.
Thank you so much for putting an exclamation mark on my point. Let me get this straight – For the simple tradition of taking a husbands name in order to establish la tradition of lineage that is over 3000 years old, you will give your kids a 14 sylable last name because of your personal demons. Boy, you sound like a super good time! Can we possibly meet for a drink later? I cant wait to hear your dramatic sob story for hours on end! Maybe we can go on an anti-male hate rally together!!
Seek therepy, your life will be better, eventually.
Rational people, tune in here:
Women are just as mentally capable as men in every respect. Hypenated last name women are crazy. Exhibit A – see above. My recommendation for men to run, not walk away from those crazy B’s still applies.
I’ve always been a fan of the double first name (i.e. John David or Leah Rose), but then again I’m from the south and I vote republican, so I’m the wrong kind of white person.
Thank God men are starting to see this and comment on it. You are 100% correct Laugh@Yourself. Look, I love women..but the hyphen crowd ARE of a different breed. No point in getting them to see it, but I wanted you to know that you are not alone in your observations. See, the one that responded to you didn’t even read your comment correctly…you never said “all women are bitches”. But that is what the hyphens see. It’s a conundrum to be sure.
L@y: “a tradition of lineage that is over 3000 years old”
Obviously, you have not studied anthropology or history.
1) You are conflating “lineage” with “naming.” Lineage systems show descent, whereas names need not. The use of patronymics does not necessarily indicate the use of patrilineal descent.
2) Granting you a free pass on 1), you are still wrong. The most commonly accepted pattern of descent in the US is not patrilineal but “bilateral,” in which every biologically ancestor and descendant is considered a social relative. Double naming most often reflects this fact.
3) Whose 3000-year-old tradition? Certainly not English-speaking North Americans. Did you not learn in elementary school that English settlers arrived on this continent barely four centuries ago? Perhaps you never considered that British nobles of the Victorian era traced descent “ambilineally,” choosing to name themselves after their more prestigious relatives, on either side. Around the world, lineage and naming are assigned in a multitude of complex ways.
4) Did you say 3000 years old? Give us an example. Most political conservatives in the US consider our society to be culturally descended from the ancient Greeks and the biblical Hebrews. So what was the last name of King David (c. 1000 BCE) or of Aristotle (c. 500 BCE)? In some cultures, surnames have been used for only two or three centuries. Ever wonder why most Ashkenazi Jews have German names? They were forced to adopt them. Today, you can easily find examples of cultures that still do not use last names.
Next time, do some research before you start shooting off your mouth. It’s lazy to make up your own figures when you don’t know the correct ones.
Some say the history of the surname can be traced back 5,000 years in China. Others argue that Chinese surnames originated from the Emperor Fu Xi (2852BC). He standardized all Chinese surnames and defined matrimonial relationship.
In Europe, surnames weren’t used until the 10th or 11th centuries AD in Venice. Gradually throughout Europe, all nobility and gentry adopted surnames until eventually surnames were used by all Europeans of all classes.
I am breathlessly waiting for James humorless (this is a satire site bro) 14 paragraph post that no one will read refuting the above statements. They will read mine because it is funny.
OK, so lets say, for sake of argument, that the above poster is non chinese – of european decent. Lets even low ball it, and instead of 3,000 years, it is 900. Does that make hyphenated last name women less insane? Other than attempting to impress us with your very expensive arts degree – is there a place you were going with this?
Examples of James whiteness:
#20: Being an expert on Your culture
“they are very ashamed of all the bad things in white culture: the KKK, colonialism, slavery, Jim Crow laws, feudalism, and the treatment of native americans.
One way they can make up for it is becoming marginally acquainted with foreign cultures.
#47: Arts degrees
These degrees enable white people to spend four yeas of their lives reading books, writing papers and feeling great about themselves. It is a known fact that Arts students firmly believe that they are doing you/society a favor by not getting a job and reading Proust. They use this to protest for reduced tuition, more money for the arts, and special reduced student rates on things like bus passes.
#101: Being offended
In many circumstances, most people they can allow smaller offenses to slip by as fighting them is a waste of time and energy. But white people, blessed with both time and energy, are not these kind of people. In fact there are few things white people love more than being offended.
I hyphenated my last name when I got married because I am the last person in my family with that last name– everyone else is dead (wow, was that melodramatic? didn’t mean it). Out of respect for my father and his family’s history, I wanted his name to live on. My husband comes from a huge family, and there is no danger of his name dying out anytime soon.
Even so, I have to say that I am not a B. I play video games, watch sports, drink beer…guys, does this help?? My husband had no problem with my choice, and if he had run the other way, I have to say I may have gladly waved goodbye– leaving someone you love because they refuse to give up their name and take yours doesn’t leave much room for things like respect and individuality, which should have a major place in relationships.
Maybe, L@Y (and others), this post isn’t funny enough to be read by anybody. I don’t pretend to know the history of naming in different cultures, nor do I care enough to copy-and-paste from Wikipedia to “prove” someone wrong on the issue.
OK, i guess that last part was kinda b*tchy.
I wanna bitch slap people who hyphenate their names.
Also people who insist on using a middle initial or start their name with initials.
Like L. Ron Hubbard.
all are pretentious, self absorbed dooshbags if ya ask me.
Its Pelé, not Pele, and he does not come from a Spanish speaking culture, moron.
This is hilarious! I am not a bit surprised by it, either. A number of my friends are guilty of this very same thing. Some of their kids names include Demonish, Devious, and Marvelous.
Funny, I work in a hospital and most people with hyphenated last names are actually Mexican. Considering that about 90% of the people I know are black and only about 1% of them have hypenated last names, I’m not sure why this keeps coming up. We are guilty of outrageous first names, but I don’t know many guilty of taking hyphenated last names. I think that, if anything, hypenated names are more of a generational thing than anything else.
Either way, this is a site dedicated to humor and if you aren’t able to laugh at yourself, maybe you should consider not visiting the site.
You’re an idiot!
Somehow this entitles us to saddle our children with a burden of an excruciatingly long last name? When women use carrying the child for nine months as a reason for entitlement, it is pure selfishness and it is usually the child who ends up having to deal with it.
I’m sure if you polled most high schools these days, you’ll find the father to be absent, so this archaic statement probably doesn’t apply much anymore. Even in homes with the father, women are just as likely to be working (if not making more money) and having to do the “wifely duties”.
Please, for the love of everything holy, do not put your entire real name out for all to see on the internet.
i have 2 last names…no hyphen…is it the 2 last names that make me a bitch …or the hypehen ? 🙂
Daughter has only 1 last name though…thought about using my maiden names as a middle name, but went with Lily instead…
of course, one should probably realize that this site is satrical and not get so cranky about it…
Ha! It must be the hyphen. I, too, took on a second last name. I also “saddled” my recently born daughter with this “burden”. However, I did not do it to make her life miserable. I actually did it to honor my own father and give her a choice. She can use either one she wants without a lot of complication later in life.
I just can’t believe how insanely humorless people have gotten on the subject. It was supposed to be a funny insight (and it was) but people are waaaaaaaaaaay to serious. Gee whiz–stop sucking the joy out of this Web site! (Not you, Jennifer–you seem to have the humor down pat!)
yes…see the bullet of “being offended” LOL
pretty sure Pele was Brazilian
Yes, he is.
And Brazil is a portuguese speaking country.
Rednecks already employ this… Except we use First names of the Momma and Pappa… for example Billy Dawn.. thats his daddys name and his mommas name. Get my drift. Now we got the last names a going… cant wait to see how there gonna fit that on a drivers Liscense. Billy Dawn Mcartney-Fowler-Robinson- Brown the second….. Damn Funny!
I guess we found something else white people like, attention to detail and not make careless errors 🙂
Haha! I sorta have a different variation of this. My parents decided to give me my dad’s surname for my last name, but they used my mom’s name for my middle. So I pretty much got the same deal, but without the hyphen:P
And my mother never changed her last name, either;)
Wow, you are an idiot. It must be nice to have no brain whatsoever. You don’t know me at all and hey, laugh@yourself, thanks for making fun of me being adopted. By the way, I never said anything about giving my kid a hyphenated name.
You guys must have nooo self-esteem whatsoever if all you have to do is call me a bitch for being adopted and offended at your comments that obviously stem from having low-level intelligence. Men are not the enemy — men like YOU are.
Did not need that much attention to realize the mistake, since I am brazilian…
But it was a careless error right?
Very funny website, but if you want to be a smartass, do your homework.
I’m white (well…pink…) and I have two last names, but not for the reason mentioned. My parents aren’t married…they basically hate eachother but stay together for my sisters and I. Legally, since my parents aren’t married I have two last names. No feminism, nitpicking, etc.
holy shit that is my exact situation i never though id see some one else
yes im white and play lacrosse my jersy is –
you were looking at black high schools
why do you gotta be half a man?
thank you for showing us how ethnically sensitive you are
Personally, as a guy, I will be taking my wife’s last name when I marry, and I will not hyphen. But this is more of an issue with my father than being sexist. My parents are divorced, and with my only siblings being sisters, he will be the only one left with his last name. except his side of the family of course.
The reason us white people might do that is because we know who both parents are.
Funny how “white people” are getting offended… relax kids…
Very right!
Would I ever have children, I’d insisted on give my last name to them. Their father’s name is not necessary though.
Actually I don’t really want to get married for the same reason – knowing that a marriage is not about love but about a “contract” for society, about properties etc., it is really disappointing. A relationship, without financial interests, is more respectable in my opinion.
I’m white, but I’m sure I’d insisted on it if I were black.
The title of the subject made me think of all of the white kids that are being given a traditional surname as a given (1st) name. Examples are names like Taylor as a 1st name.
What is that supposed to mean?
that is simply not true!! and what does that have to do with this subject? and since you are praising (us)the white race for knowing who both of your parents are, wasn’t their a blog about how white kids hate their parents???? you just put yourself and your race in a win win situation just like the writer of these blogs say is typical of us whites…
yes, and the name of the parents are usually Adam and Steve, or Eva and Eve.
Er…Spanish speaking cultures? That should be interesting to tell Pele about, since he DOESN’T SPEAK A FREAKING WORD OF IT.
Know why? Because he is BRAZILIAN. And wow, guess what language is NOT spoken in Brazil? SPANISH!!!!
Brazilians speak PORTUGUESE.
Stuff People That Write These Posts Like:
#1 Being uncultured about the rest of the world
I have to admit, that I rarely ever meet another person with two last names.
BUT that could be because I’m uncultured about the rest of the world? ;].
I have two last names though. Haha.
Well as far as I know Pelé does speak spanish 😛 But yeah I see your point, Pelé isn’t part of a spanish speaking culture. 😛
and don’t forget “the third, the fourth, junior and senior”. that’s a white thing too. I would know, being a “white”. I do think this site should be called ” what lily white people like”. I’m white and i don’t like much of this stuff, but i’ve spent a majority of my life re-appropriating black culture into my own lifestyle, as that is what the media told me to do for a long time.
and because white people are so hated, it seemed to be better than being ridiculed.
FYI – Pele is Brazilian and Brazilian people speak Portuguese, not Spanish.
I totally agree w/ you.
This one on the list has morphed across-the-races. I’m part of this, and I’m not white. Maybe we figure if we have more names, we’ll get further in life. http://muttslikeme.wordpress.com/about/
Kylee-Amber-Madison Johnson
[…] gets to rest up until Saturday. Lots of time to talk about the playoffs. Maybe I can catch a lacrosse game in the next few days. Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)New Plan For […]
Us white people also like Is, IIs, Sr. Jr. the second, the third, and double middle names, so names can often end up like:
Kevin Jack Luke St. Lukas-Corinza III Jr.
I have two last names, but only because my parents weren’t married. Technically, I originally only had my father’s last name, but my mom had my name changed to include her last name as well when they broke up. So it’s not really a story of “hey, i think it’s sexist to have two last names” but more of the fact that she didn’t want me to have the possible legal problem of having a different last name than her (for example, whenever we have to get anything done that requires legal documents pertaining our names, she has to point out that her maiden name is indeed Ferrier and that matches the second part of my last name).
That’s a pretty creative way of getting back at him, hahaha. I actually know another guy who is doing something similar.
Well, to be fair, I’ve met several guys named Pele who are from Spanish-speaking countries. They might have some heritage from a Portuguese-speaking country, I’m not sure. But it does happen.
There’s also the highly likely chance that we’re all falling for a joke on the part of the writer and he did that on purpose.
That’s not a white people thing.
The Egyptians, Assyrians, Chinese all do the same thing.
That’s not a good idea because the whole idea of having last names was to prevent INCEST and also INBREEDING (diseases etc.)
If that’s the way, the girl called Jane Mother’s last name may marry a relative and commit incest without knowing it (due to deceptively different last names).
I think the best idea (since we are in an era of excess server space) is to list out all the family names in formal documents, and then shorten it to the regular dad’s family name or just one hyphenated dad-mom’s family name for informal documents classes etc.
E.g.
Certificate of Birth / Passport:-
First name, Paternal grandfather’s name-paternal grandmother’s name=maternal grandpa’s name-maternal grandma’s name
Erin Jacqueline Jr. Murphy-Pereira=Dujardin-Richards
Less formal records
Erin Murphy Jr.
I’m from South America and i have 2 last names. My complete name is long (Alicia Francisca Ballesteros Pérez) and it’s a pain to complete one-last-name based forms, but i prefer this naming system hands down. I want to keep my complete name forever, regardless my marital status (in Chile, women usually keep their 2 last names after marriage) and if i have childern, i’d like them to have my first last name.
“This is a joke I read on a Fantale:
Women have been rejcting the names of their husbands only to keep the name of another man…
Their father’s.”
Yeah, still patriarchal, but less sexist (and offending) to me:
1. Parents usually are forever, husbands usually aren’t.
2. It’s normal -and healthy- to consider your parents as your superiors. Your husband should be your partner, your equal.
3. Your father usually has a great influence on who you are: half of your genome is his and/or he is your role model (for good or for bad). When you marry, you should be an adult with a full-developed identity…so why the name-changing?
For example: I am a lot like my dad, we have the same profesions, he is my boss in one of my jobs and our last name has some prestige in our area (a la Ivanka Trump)… and my spanish last names agree with my “hispanic” look and culture. So, if i marry my boyfriend, why should i adopt his jewish last name(s)?
It’s fucking ridiculous. Next thing you know we are going to have Elijah Robinson-Smith-Johnson-Anderson-James-Johnson-Brennan-Roberts.
And I suppose it never occurred to you that having your husband take your name would _still_ say “There is no seperation, I am you, you are me.” Not to mention that your husband my any other name would smell as sweet as well.
(Do you also go to the bathroom together? After all, there is no separation, yeah?)
So what’s the cake? I suppose you’re saying there is some intrinsic “reward” in getting married, for which women have to pay by giving up their names?
Of course, poor men with testicles get nothing from marriage (besides a free housekeeper and sex-toy), so there’s no payment necessary.
Then why have you, John *Chrichton*?
People with these hyphenated last names need to get over themselves. Its re fucking diculous. You marry a man, and you get his last name. Its not really a big deal. Its a tradition that makes sense. Men carry on their family name. It just keeps it simple.
Having two last names just makes you look like an idiot and pisses everyone else off.
The time spent writing tis would have been beter used making your man a sandwich or cleaning something.
It’s always funny to watch men get all freaked out when women assert their independence. Heaven forbid they choose to keep their own last names and not assume yours. If we lived in a matrilineal society would you take your wife’s last name or would you want to keep your own if you had the choice?
I’m male and I had a hyphenated last name until I was about 14, at which point I just took my dad’s last name, for no other reason but that it sounds more fluid with the rest of my name, since my first + middle names are Spanish, my dad’s last name is Spanish, and my mom’s last name is Irish. Doesn’t really sound that great together.
But I think women should keep their own last names, kids should get both initially and then choose which of the two they want to pass on.
i just spit out all the water i had in my mouth when i read this
That makes me feel better about my typo, and for the record, I have no issue with women keeping last names, or kids getting their moms, but more than one last name sounds kinda bad 95% of the time. I would have been Zakrowski-Andrzejewski so I have a personal stake in this
I know you’re trying to be funny (fail!) , but just to be sure:
1. “My man” is an adult with a functional brain and body, he is able to make himself a sandwich.
2. I’m also a functional adult and i work my ass off, so what i do in my free time shouldn’t be anyone’s business.
3. I have a nanny and house is clean
I like this idea of letting the kids choose. I’ve also heard of families that give their kids the mother’s maiden name as middle names.
I… Don’t really know what to think. I think the hyphenated names are silly to me, but they are very important to others, and everyone has their reasons. I think the sexist reasons of women not wanting to lose their name because it would make then inferior is silly. I personally believe if you marry someone you’ve become one so to speak.
I don’t get what the point of getting married to someone is if you feel compelled to take great strides in making sure you are recognized as an individual before a couple. Not saying that you should ever give up your individuality or self worth, you shouldn’t have to change those things to be with your partner, but if you are so independent thinking then why did you get married in the first place? Being married is the opposite of personal independence, you’re supposed to be dependent/take care of one another.
But I digress. In some cultures the hyphenated names is part of the culture, and something like that I can respect. I have a friend who is considering hyphenating her name because she wouldn’t like the alliteration caused by taking her fiance’s last name… different but, that is her decision.
Personally I would take my husband’s last name as that is what I feel I’m supposed to, and I don’t really care. I don’t have any sort of emotion or connection to my last name. It’s just a name to me… I don’t have any real connection with my dad, so maybe that is why I don’t feel anything special. My dad’s other biological child is a boy, let him carry on the name.
I know your trying to be snippy and psuedo-empowered (success), but just to be sure:
1. Note the comment I made not long before yours where I mentioned my real feeling on the issue
2. At least one person testified to spitting out their water at the sight of my comment
3. Sometimes it’s nice to make your loved ones a sandwich, regardless of the genders of the parties involved.
So…I decided to go with a hyphenated last name when I married five years ago. The result–a last name that is too ridiculous to even utter aloud.
yea, I hypenated my last name and hated it
I would love to take my maiden name back, for no other reason that it’s truely who I am
it is only tradition, not law, that you take your husband’s last name or give your baby the father’s last name, you can give your child any last name that your heart desires
my (white) boys have hypenated names, they hit 18 and they dropped the second last name, they hated hypenated names
most women I meet with two last names, are snobby,
but is it a sign of the time or a fad……..when my kids started school in the mid 80’s I was startled to see all these teachers with Ms. before their name. I was also startled to see all the white kids in Kindergarten with two last names , even though my white kids had double names too, I didn’t know it was a popular thing to have.
now I’m surprised to see hispanic children with only one last name
I’ll NEVER use a double last name again……..and I hope I NEVER see another kid with a double last name that is white
and for a time we lived in a colored part of town, and all the girls it seemed had a name that was mixed with the suffix eisha…….kaneisha, lateisha, you name it there was a girl with it. I never understood the —–eisha names. I always wondered if that was an african cultural thing or just another fad.
thank you, I wish I had listened and not done this to my sons
you are so right, if there is a dad, still mom does most of everything………and he’ll take all the credit……..and then call her a bitch if she points out that it’s cuz of her that he’s taking the credit
Isn’t any better comment than to be told I act like a white.
Even if people mean it as an insult
the mere term………”you people” says it all about you.
I don’t know any boys named Morgan, but know many girls with that name. Why anyone would want to give their little girls a name so close to the word Morgue is beyond me.
i guess it’s a matter of perspective, cuz I’m white and I would say those are black names
okay and this is a serious question
how is the de pronounced, is it day or dee or di
thank you for making me laugh out loud with this comment,
sperm donor is the correct term, partner is too contractive
as long as they don’t mix with black…….
Funny. In my area of the country (and I assume in all others) it’s the black women who insist of having hyphenated last names.
It’s so nice to read a comment like this amidst all the hyphen-haters! I’m nine months pregnant and still in the process of deciding what to do about the baby’s last name. I kept my father’s name (“maiden name” is a weird codeword, no?) because I just don’t see myself with a Anglo LN, and we had initially decided to use my LN, with husband’s LN as a middle name… primarily because *I* have/had hyphen-prejudice. But I like the idea of the kid getting both at first and then choosing when he’s a teenager.
The issue for those of us who actually are young with two last names is that in a country where you never met your actual father, and were given the last name of someone you met when you were 9 is a bit wrong, and since you “have” to legally take their name, here I am an 18 year old male, with a 19 character last name.
It’s important to remind everyone that the blog is titled “Having TWO last names,” so let’s just put an end to this discussion about three- or four-word last names.
Must add Camping and Organic Frozen Yogurt to your list.
Thanks!
PS… It’s embarassing how few of those don’t apply to me. I don’t like Snow Boarding, for one.
Last names are not to prevent incest. They never were. And the reason they were created was to determine who belonged to what tribe or clan. (Often, these clans intermarried)
The reason the woman took the man’s name at marriage is because she was no longer the property of her father, but the property of her husband.
For the record, I did take my husband’s name. I don’t have a problem with people taking or keeping names, or hyphenating them. I do have a problem with people making a big deal out of decisions that don’t affect them, or that they want attention for making.
There’s also the point that everyone knows who the baby’s mother is, but the paternity needed to be acknowledged — especially important in Europe, during some of our less than luminary years. Important rights and privileges were bestowed upon the progeny — whether from in our out of wedlock. Fortunes were transmitted through the male line of the family, so giving the child the name of the father — and having said father recognize the child — was essential to the well-being of the child. Many fortunes were in fact passed on outside the “atomic family” through sons born outside the marriage. So naming a child with the father’s name used to be a necessity for identifying the child, rather than a statement of possession. The use of a family name as a was established much later, after the habit of inheriting titles through paternity was well established. They replace nobility titles in the more flattened new society that came out of the revolutions around 1848. It really is a turn-of-the-century invention, really.
in portugal, it is customary that the wife adds her husband’s name on to her own surname
my name is james teixeira kong
(teixeira from my mother – kong from my father)
my mother is
jacinta maria dos reis teixeira kong
(dos reis from grandparent, teixeira from father and kong from husband)
the spaniards, brazilians and cubans have a similar system
i suppose we dont qualify as whites though…
Spaniards and Portuguese count as white because they’re European. Brazilians and Cubans, no.
Trolling troll is obvious
Pele is from a portuguese speaking culture, whitey.
My observations, spanning several years, is that very few white people do this. The overwhelming majority is from black people, possibly because they think it sounds sophisticated; much like the popularity of the 70s-90s of mimicking, and butchering, french-sounding names (e.g., Lashanta, Laquita).
I know more black people with two last names than I do white people
“da Pinto”? Verdade?
I think the having two last names thing is also a symptom of 21st century living. Especially in Quebec, where people have fully embraced the whole idea of having children and never getting married, more and more kids are getting hyphenated last names because their mother and father aren’t married, and if they ever do break up, the claim to the child is there. I also think it makes it confusing for the children. But as long as the two last names aren’t from two different cultures (ie Spanish and French), it doesn’t sound so horrible… it just becomes complicated to write.
What about honoring one parent by using their name as the first and the other parent as the last name?
My son (if I had one) would be Gregor Devine.
I have two last names because my parents werent married when i was born. My mom just gave her and my dads last names along with two middle names. You should see my name on the attendance list at my school.
i totally understand you!
Joeseph Marciano-Giordano,
Your parents weren’t married when you were born? There is a one-word name that describes your birth.
What happens when hyphened-named kid’s parent get divorced and remarried to a hyphenated-named step parent who adopts the hyphened-named kid? Do they then take the two hyphenated names and combine them with another hyphen and make a quadrupled hyphenated name?
Sheesh, this all happens because of the stupid women’s “liberation” movement crisis the liberals started and exploited back in the 60’s.
When I see a married woman who has didn’t take her husband’s last name I ask why she kept her father’s last name. Why would a feminist want to keep her Father’s last name anyway. How un-liberated. Even if a feminist wanted to take her mother’s maiden name she would be taking the her grandfather’s name.
I have my husband’s double-barrelled surname. In England, having a double-barrelled name used to be a sign that you came from the landed gentry. The woman’s name came first, always, and came with a huge dowry. The man’s name came last, and they combined their family crests. Now it’s a sign that you aren’t married…I hate people assuming the latter, obviously…
Wow, that’s as complicated as the feminist method we have in the US.
Prior to the American Cultural Revolution of the 60’s, the “enslaved” married women choose to use their husband’s name along with the actual abbreviation for mistress.
“Unliberated” women of the 60’s were so enslaved that they choose to use Mrs. and their husbands first names to identify themselves.
When Mary Jones married Bill Smith, she became Mrs. Bill Smith. This was a choice the pre-60’s woman was proud to make and was not mandated by law or required by society.
Miss was a title of respect for an unmarried woman.
Now we have “liberated ” women who, rather than being identified as married by using Mrs., chose to hide their marrital status by using the non-abbreviation of a non-word, Ms.
Ms. is not an abbreviation even though it ends in a period. Ms. is not a word.
White women now choose to hide and reveal their marital status by using Ms.. But they still reveal their marital status by using a hyphenated name that combines their father’s last name and their husband’s last name.
So now we have Ms. Katelyn Smith-Jones. Everyone knows that Katelyn is married to Nathan Smith just as we knew the same about Mrs. Bill Smith. But now, we also know that she is a liberated feminist because she uses Ms. and the hyphenated name.
So, like all of the stupid things liberal white people do, their naming practices just label the extent and derivation of their stupidity.
It also makes it easier for the white woman to regain the use of her father’s last name as her last name when she divorces her husband.
If you want to piss off a married liberal white woman who you know as Ms. Katelyn Smith-Jones, call her Mrs. Jones.
I do it all the time.
The modern problem of salutations in emails to women of unknow marital status is easily resolved.
Unliberated men still use Mr. (abbreviation of Mister). No problem. You reply to Nathan Smith-Jones as Mr. Jones.
But, what about Katelyn Smith?
I reply back, “Dear Katelyn Smith.” Simple and I don’t have to conform to liberal dogma.
Now if you are a real liberal white man you will adopt my new surname to bring you into parity with real liberal white woman – Mrt.
It is a combination of Mister (Mr.) and Master (a title for young men). It is pronouced “Mert” and rhymes with Bert.
“Mrt. Nathan Smith, meet Ms. Katelyn Jones”
Lol very true.
http://www.beabetterproducer.com
i have 2 last names, but my mum didn’t do it, it was my sister…
that sounded very… incestuous, but i assure you it’s not
This is directly related to #11
White people love to have the most unique given names for their children. Then another parent finds out and think to themself, “Hey! Why didn’t I think of that name for our child?”
We are also the only people to have 2 first names.
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE who seem to WASTE their time and money on dealing with two last names.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
“While it’s true that many Spanish speaking cultures do this, often times their names are crazy long but are often shortened into sweet one word nicknames like Pele. Also, there is a historical precedent.”
Pele is a Portuguese name. The player you are referring to is Brazilian. While a small part speaks Spanish, the vast majority of Brazilians speak Portuguese.
But I wouldn’t expect an ignorant American to know that.
whoa take it easy psycho he had nothing agaisnt pele
=Billy Bob Brock-Bradley haha
Nah he just sore that Americans invent cooler things.
It’s not just the Spanish, many European countries do. The English have had hyphenated last names for ages, or two last name, no hyphen, mother’s followed by father. My Initial are HASB.
Some Dutch/Danish people have very long names, paternal linage first names I think, similar to Spanish/Portuguese/Brazilian
Why would anyone give you money instead of donating it to something that will do something useful with the money?
And Asians, Blacks, and Hispanics are capable of having just as much money as white people,
Some white people ‘NEED’ their money too
There are other rich people that aren’t white.
And why don’t you do something with your life instead of begging for money over the internet?
im a feminist, so i get where thats coming from but i feel like the kid would feel dumb putting their first,last and last last name on a paper
I have 2 last names but not because im white, though i do know a white 2 white people with split last names, but because my parents divorsed when around the time i was born (not because my mom was 16 or 18) and my dad asked if i could still have his last name resulting in XXXX XXX but i only use my first last name(?) ironicly enough i am hispanic
You could go for combining last names: John Lennon and Yoko Ono talked about changing their marriage name to “Lenono”. The drive towards gender equality doesn’t only center on the double surname, though to indicate the child’s parental families is kinda cool. I have the French double nickname…both initials J.C. (looks around). +
My Mom never restored her maiden name, therefore I’m gonna pass it on and my bro passed his onto my nephew. My aunt in France where our Dad is from said “we’re the only two males left with the surname” all the way in the USofA. I thought it’s a common surname in Artois and Flanders regions of France, won’t be dying out soon. +
In Japan, people commonly have family names first than the personal names (Lander-san Justin), where family identity is strongly valued and emphasis on not dishonoring the family was an east Asian trait (or stereotype), all cultural traits are stereotypes…but why? It might be true. +
Right out of a Monty Python show skit on a royal-noble with a peculiar name. (get ready, this is real and really long):
Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern -schplenden -schlitter -crasscrenbon -fried -digger -dangle -dungle -burstein -von -knacker -thrasher -apple -banger -horowitz -ticolensic -grander -knotty -spelltinkle -grandlich -grumblemeyer -spelterwasser -kürstlich -himbleeisen -bahnwagen -gutenabend -bitte -eine -nürnburger -bratwustle -gerspurten -mit -zweimache -luber -hundsfut -gumberaber -shönendanker -kalbsfleisch -mittler -raucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.
I agree with McLovin. 90% of hypennated names are black women. You see more Laquisha Williams-Davis than Penelope Barr-Sweeny.
Ummmm…I’m Black (Biracial) and I have ONE last name. My Father’s.
Oh, and we have more names than “Laquisha”.
Joeseph Marciano-Giordano Im thinking of doing this with my daughter but worried it will be a huge confusing mess. how does it work for you?
So here is my problem I have a daughter from a previous relationship who has my last name. I am having a child with another man now and we are not married. I want my child to have his last name but also do not want to have a different last name than my child or have my children have different names. If i marry this man someday I could not have my daughter left out with my maiden name. So the only option I can see is to hyphen this childs name but I also worry about how it will all work. What initials does she use, what about school, when she gets married. I dont know what to do!
Considering men are the ones that have the ability to leave without a care in the world, still can walk out there door anytime they want without a diaper bag or babysitter and a million other things, have to be told to help rather than have to do it by nature, don’t go through prgnancy or child birth and don’t begin to even understand how hard that is, and a mother has to always worry about a man caring about his dick first and leaving for the next woman he sees cause u have responsibilities to his child and a million other reasons i think a woman deserves the right to name her child.
Psh. Two last names rock. im not white by the way =]
Amber – your problem is that you have keep having bastard children. What to name them should be the least of your worries.
You need to stop being so selfish and think about the welfare of your children.
Didn’t anyone ever tell you that you are supposed to get married before you have children?
Amber – what should you do? Keep your legs closed and stop being such a slut.
this is more of a women thing then white people thing
Another thing white people like to do is tell people how to do things. Point and case, you.
Hey DaddyYo… Why don’t you keep your mouth close and stop being such a douchebag?
Janine – I agree with your last name assessment. Your maiden name is your father’s last name. That makes all this “I want to keep my name” that white feminist claim seem kind of stupid.
However, if i may, you are not black if you are biracial. You aren’t white either. You are biracial. Just like President Obama.
As a general thought – I wonder what the child of a married couple who were both biracial would be called? Quadracial?
Steven – people telling other people what to do are called morals, mores and laws. Every society has them.
DaddyYo:
Thanks. I am so over this new “fashion” of hyphenating, making maiden names middles names, ect. You’re not cool or progressive in my opinion. You’re annoying. My mother took my father’s last name and kept it moving. My grandma, aunts, and cousins did the same. When I get married, my last name will be that of husbands. Trends and the people that follow them are fools. I am all about keeping to traditions and taking my husbands last name is a non-negotiable one.
Yes, I am Biracial, but alas in this country at least, people still have issues with it. Choosing my “Black Side” has just always made things easier for me I guess. Quite strange when you consider that all the guys that I have ever dated have been White. Go figure.
Quadracial?
You are crazy. LOL!
Seriously, my kids would be considered Quadroons.
Quadroon usually referred to someone of one-quarter black ancestry; that is, with three white grandparents but also refers to a person of one-quarter Caucasian ancestry and three-quarters black ancestry. A quadroon has a biracial (mulatto) parent (black and white) and one white parent or black parent.
That just sounds wrong to me. I will call them “My colorful little humans!”
Hahahahaha
Jon Stewart LEIBOWITZ
are you mexican or hispanic?
Are those two names always hyphenated like “Sadler-Moore”?
Daddyyo, You’re incredibly rude to her, I rather make you apologize and slap some common sense. She’s a mother, not what you think she is…all I know is she has a new relationship. It’s none of your business to judge her for where she’s in life. Shame on you.+
ugh, I hate people with two last names. So pretentious.
What’s even worse is when these assholes get married and the wife just adds yet another last name instead of, you know, taking the man’s last name like everybody else who isn’t a retard does.
Kind of funny. Except Pele is Brazilian, and speaks portuguese, not spanish.
Call the Waaaambulance. I’ll judge her all I want. she is a drag on socirty and her children will be the worse off for her selfishness.
You just help her by not judging her badly. There is nothing wrong with judging people. You just judged me as rude. Why is it okay for you to judge my insignifcant comments on a web site but you not judge some women who hops from one “relationship” to another popping out bastards along the way.
Judgement is mine sayith the Lord. Right? Well, I’m not saying she is going to hell. I am saying she is a person of low character who is damaging to society and her children.
Shame on you for condoning the kind of society that can’t even remember what it is to be a moral person.
Stop being offended and go back to drinking some coffee in your volvo. Stop sleeping around, keep those legs closed, and read a book. enough fornicating. start reading books.
i have 2 last name 😀
i am a loser with too many names and too much time. i think the reason why i’m skrewd up is cuz my dad rapes me… Blak pwr
Serena Williams is smoking hot dawgg
Michael on August 16, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Sorry, that’s how I get through life. At work, in school and with other people. More of a Californian thing, if I wasn’t in the state of Cal. I wouldn’t be required to, then I’m one of those autistic nerds or something tries to get by in life. I’m a product of my own environment, middle-class people get down on their luck and have to face reality. I share this guy’s sarcastic sense of humor on how he perceives the world through a “white man’s” comical point of view. +
See autism boy, I can dig up alot more on your dumb ass if you continue with this race shit that you started.
Test me bitch.
YOINK!
ACTUAL ADVICE
if your daughter is old enough ask her if she wants to change her name
if not wait till she is
I don’t know the situation but I would only want the last name (names because I’m latina) of someone I was related to
HAHA I saw this site on http://www.DanielDickey.com and think it’s DEF just a funny!!
Is there a stuffjewishpeoplelike.com ??
Well, we’re not living in small villages anymore, so incest isn’t a big problem. Do you think that most Americans would really be pleased to have to list maternal and paternal grandparents’ last name in any kind of document?
I have 3 last names. But I am from Pele’s country, Brazil, where it is common to have 2 surnames (or even more) and where we speak PORTUGUESE. lol.
But I considered it as a joke.
Yes but in the end you still have to make a choice. Cause you can´t have 4 last names so when naming your child you still have to choose whether or not to pass on the fathers or mothers name.
I saw this site on http://www.DanielDickey.com(the MTV VJ) and must say it is just as funny!!
Did this guy make StuffJewishPeopleLike.com too?
Mo Danger, seriously. I think I have a hernia, can you check it…
http://www.brainbooger.com/2/post/2009/09/twilight-part-6.html
Are you kidding!?!? A jew?? Notice the big schnoz, curly, pube-like hair and overly generous amount of space between his upper lip and nostrils, he’s clearly African American…
Soo, i’m getting married and also having a baby boy. I’ve really tried to read as many posted comments about this topic: both parents having two last names. And it totally makes sense to give the child one LN from each parent, (hyphenated & dads LN first.)
But i have yet to come upon anyone mentioning what if one parent has one last name and the other with two last names. what do they do. *(not to be a bore and write so much, im searching for answers or even just ANYONEs opinion)*
my soon-to-be husband has one last name and i have two LN, hyphenated. his name is not changing whatsoever and naturally i would like to keep one of my LN while also taking on my husbands LN. that would make it:
my FN husbandsLN-myLN(one not both)
As for the kid, i would also prefer him too follow through:
kidsFN husbandsLN-myLN
is that being too demanding? is it leaving the father out because he remains with one LN? and then should i even bother with adding my chosen LN to my sons?
for one, you hear of many married couples each person having different LN for whatever reason, and traditional married couples carrying LN thats the same …………..
but what about a couple where he keeps his LN and then the wife adds his LN hyphenated(or not) to her name?
does anyone know of any couple like that?
if that happens, does his LN go on the line before her LN or totally at the end of her whole name?
ie: Jack Smith & Helena Ramirez-Salis
a) Helena Smith Ramirez, Helena Smith-Ramirez or
b) Helena Ramirez Smith, Helena Ramirez-Smith
i think respectfully hyphen with his LN first, but im also just sooooo confuzzeld!
Probably he meant South American countries. I am from Venezuela and I have also 2 last names, but not like in the USA father(dash)mother or even in some cases mother(dash)father.
come on! is not so hard… im spanish, and what we do here is when 2 persons having 2 last names (which is always) have a child, they give only the first last name each, no matter what the order…
Erika,
Gosh, you are really seeing the problem that the feminist created. I’m guessing you are young enough that you are too far away from even knowing why liberla Americanse even use the goofy hyphens.
First, let’s get it clear. Your maiden name is not your last name – it is your fathers last name. So there is no feminist pride that can be assigned to using your maiden name in any hyphen arrangement. So forget it.
It does nothing but make you look silly by thinking a name is going to advance feminist political theroy.
It makes your husband look weak to kowtow to mindless and meaningless feminism.
Read a little history and see that the woman has taken the name of her husband for decades among western people.
Feminism is a nonscensical and discredited movement. Let it go.
Only women who’ve lost their youthful looks care about Feminism. Good looking youthful women do not need the Feminist Movement.
Listen to the song, “Because I’m Blonde” by Julie Brown (1984) from the Goddess of Progress Album.
the Real Deal, all women need to be respected to be not seen as “lessers” by male constituents. Feminism in the 60s, the early 20th century and today are separate entities in waves, it’s the third-wave feminism of 1990’s and 2000’s damaged the once-proud or hailed reputation of women’s rights. Since when feminism is discredit and hated so much? At least, women can vote and have an abortion on demand, and can apply or hold a job while male coworkers are told never (by threat of pink slips or lawsuits) ask you out on a date, it’s illegal/immoral/immature/unethical/sexist/sexual abuse…and you can thank the third wave feminists for it.
That person you described to be Jewish can also be…
1. Arab/Middle-Eastern, also have ethnic Semite origins.
2. Italian or Greek, except we refer them as “Caucasian”.
3. Hispanic or Caribbean, high mixture of African/Spaniard.
4. Polynesian, as well an Aborigine, but not quite African.
or 5. Cosmetic! Justin Timberlake goes all out Michael Jackson. Any whites wanna surgically look African? Then come on down! Jews are able to grow natural “Jew-fros”.
I’m not sure where you got the idea that the father’s last name come’s first. As a person with two last names, who knows several other hyphenated perons, I can attest that the mother’s name comes first. Most people then commonly mistake the mother’s name as a middle name, assuming the father’s name is the last name (whether they know you or not) until you choose to correct them. When my parents married, my father kept his name and my mother added his name to (the end of) hers, which was passed on to the kids. Following that format, one would assume that combining multiple last names, the fathers’ last names would carry forward (unless you have personal reasons for choosing the mother’s name instead).
IE: Mr Kline and Ms Smith = Smith-Kline
Mr Williams and Ms Hill = Hill-Williams
Mr Smith-Kline and Ms Hill-Williams = Williams-Kline
Solved that one when I got married the easy way, my wife simply elected to take my last name.
Mr. Mastin – you make the common error that negates your entire arguement. Women do not have their own last name.
Their maiden names are their father’s last names.
Also, if I saw your name as written above with just your first initial, I would assume you were a woman.
Only feminist women or men gelded by the feministist movement would use a hyphenated name.
Man up bud. Marraige is a equal partnership operating under the title of your last name.
Erika
About your son: I think the formula “Kid’s first name + husband’s LN-one of your LN” is good enough. I don’t think you’re leaving him out, since his LN goes first….you must discuss it with your husband, though, the boy is also his son so his opinion is pretty important.
About your name: your name, your choice (you can call yourself “Madonna Wonderwoman” if you want to)… it’s ok if you want to share last names with your husband and son, but -in my opinion- i don’t think the order is that important.
LET’S NOT FORGET! The ‘double-barrel’ last name is synonymous with assassins.
My friend has three kids, all of whom have three first names and then their fathers’ (all different) surname followed by hers.
she recently married and now the kids have the new guy’s surname tacked onto the end, but the hyphen has moved, so whereas the hyphen was previously between their two surnames,now they have their own father’s surname, unhyphened, followed by their mum’s surname and the new guy’s surname, hyphened. so each child has 6 names, 3 forenames and 3 surnames.
I avoided this situation because I already have a long name and two surnames (a genuine, old, double barrelled name) and my kids have three first names and so I registered them at birth with their dad’s surname.
If I was 100% white,I guess I would have done something similar to me (white) friend.
It is definitely the woman’s maiden name followed by the man’s surname. The name should remain the same, not be mucked about by future generations!!
White peoplelike hyphenating their names because it gives people the illusion of upper class (because lower class whites with money feel inferior) I can vouch for the fact that people from older moneyed families do not actually give a fig whether you are upper or lower class, and hyphenating your name to make it look upper class is definitely a faux-pas.Respect is given to people who are true to their roots.
What a horrible comment, my son is autistic and he is definitely not a nerd. Prejudice against people with learning disabilities is counterproductive and destructive for everyone.
Shame on you Michael.
I hate to interrupt your blog with a non-related topic, but about the SWPL comments: The man who’s pretending to be me by stealing my previous screen names to type really stupid trollish things was reported to J.C. Lander. Nothing has been done and the blog started to become inactive, therefore I comment under an anonymous name without the “+” sig-mark. Yea, I am autistic and struggled with the disorder for my 30 year life (was diagnosed at age 5). And for someone to destroy my reputation there is really low, he doesn’t deserve to make fun of autistic people such as your son…and I truly wish him well in life. + – Michael
The most sensible thing anyone has said so far on this comments page!
The only excuse for being double-barrelled is if you marry the last, female representative of a wealthy family and take over the estate.
Or as a wit once put it: “being double barrelled used to mean you were posh, Now it means you’re a bastard”
I’m Brazilian and have two surnames because it’s how we do it here (just like Hispanics); by what last name would people call me? My name is Gabriel Maldini Soares, being Maldini my mother’s family name and Soares my father’s family name; people call me sometimes by my full name, sometimes as “Gabriel Soares”, sometimes “Gabriel Maldini”. How would somebody read my name in North America?
I personally use more my mother’s last name because it’s less common in Brazil. Is it Ok too?
I recently have had this double last name in my family, and I would like to know if it has problems using these names and if one has two last names, you can use either-or name ? Also, is it possible to have two social insurance numbers, birth certificates, drivers license, health cards, or any other important document that is required by law? And if the last two surnames are hyphenated, do they have to be alway used that way, instead of the non-hyphenated way that you say you use either name at times? Also if a parent, say the mothers name is used last, is it possible to get more social assistance, as the child has the mothers last name and not the fathers, or that the father has a harder time to prove the child is his if there is a problem in the relationship without doing dna testing? Maybe there is another way to find this out if you don”t know. or can lead me in the right direction for these answers, Thanks.
In some cases this is true, but I personally know a woman that just want to go to bed with any man to get pregnant and then leave about 3-4 months before the kid comes along, and bitches that he left her, took all her money and was a loser. Well this woman has 4 kids from 4 different men and has no care in the world as we all keep her and her ways. She recently had her 4th, and we are justwaiting for her to finally leave, but she’s waiting to do her last hurrah. She signed herself in to a womans shelter and lied her way in saying that he abused her and I know for a fact that is not true, she’ had the cops come and take him away in cuffs, only to return with no charges against him, and she is trying to have him put away for awhile for insanity, and he has been tested for everything and nothing is wrong, she put in into bankruptsy as she needed everything, so she thought, The trouble is he thinks he loves her——his very first relationship, and turns a blind eye and a deaf ear to her lies. and she says someone else made me do that or say that, or I was upsept and didn’t realize what I was doing. He thought he could change her for the better, but she cost him his job or jobs, and now maybe is family as she says she wants all of us to have no part of the kids life or even see the kid—–the guy is our son, and we love him, but he can’t understand why we feel the way we do. They constantly fight on the phone all the time and she has to know every move he makes, she doesn”t care for her kids as they are filthy—stinky filthy, their doctoring isn;t up to date, mouthfull of cavities, and they are not fed properly, but yet she gets these big cheques twice a month for these kids and blows it and then wants more. One cheque is for welfare so we all support her, and she sits on her big lazy butt smoking, watching movies, and running around when ever she wants. This is not fair and it’s not just the men who run. She runs with her brood, puts the kids names in hers, so she can collect the biggest amount she can and she doesn’t have to chase the man for support as the kids aren’t in the mans name at birth. Next month this broad will be collecting close to $3,200, and sitting on her ASS, laughing at us poor idiots that are paying her way. This is wrong in my eyes an d many others too, and probably when she fianally is done putting my son in the gutter or sewer, she’ll move on to #5, and another kid. The kids are her moneymakers, and she has no love for them, and she is nothing but trash. So it isn’t just men who take off when there are kids.
White people like hyphenated national identities, along with a second last name and a third wife (now divorced). But they don’t like a second job, an “under the table” second income and second-class/third-rate stores. LOL! Life…ain’t that a b*tch? Oops…I shouldn’t wrote that.
This is fantastic 🙂 I just forwarded it to my mother-in-law! I was married 3 months ago to someone who’s parent’s hyphenated their names and their children’s names, and thus, I too, now have a hyphenated last name. The number of people who jokingly asked if we would hyphenate MY maiden name along with my husband’s last name was massive. I’m slowly getting used to it, but have noticed how rediculous and inconvenient it is in multiple situations…..pray for my poor future children 😉
Funny you should say that. I’m South African and there’s a growing culture of women keeping and hyphenating their surnames, especially celebrities and those in the South African government.
And they are all BLACK, by the way.
And what’s wrong with being a bastard?
Um… didn’t you read his post? That is entirely his own (hyphenated) surname, from birth. At the end, he said: “Solved that one when I got married the easy way, my wife simply elected to take my last name.”
Trolling fail.
What DID your mother do to you, DaddyYo?
Nothing, unless you want to earn less money, have a greater chance of going to jail, be more less happy and cost society more than you contribute to society.
If you want to be so selfish and withold all the other advantages of having two parents to your children, you can do that. Then you can feel better about yourself because you have children that have the same disadvantages as you. You’ll still be a loser but you won’t be alone.
My mother raised me with love and understanding. So did my father.
What did your father and feminism do to you?
No need to answer. I’ve seen so many of the walking wounded from the culture war.
I have a hyphenated last name, but I’m black. I only started to appreciate the uniqueness of my last names when I became an adult. However, white people are always asking the origins of my last names and seem to be fascinated that someone who is neither white nor hispanic has two last names. So annoying.
We just put on that face so we don’t hurt your feeelings with how ridiculous we really think it is.
Just because some black people have 2 last names doesn’t make white people like it any less.
Spare them the indiginity, don’t have any.
Apperantly you aren’t aware that Obamao, and Clintoon are both bastards. I think its a prerequisite or something now, for anybody seeking a democrat nomination for office.
Why is everything always reduced to racist, and mean-spirited words on this board ? I’m a beautiful half black, and half white woman, and I feel no hate for anyone. I just can’t believe that some of you really feel this way about black people, and white people. What has happened to people hearts? Jesus, it’s 2009, and if one were to read this thread, you would think that Jim Crow was still in effect.
Jeebus.
Some people see racism in a glass of milk. I do hate those kinds of people, and liberals, and queers, and pretty much everybody to the left of Ghengis Khan. I know its hard for liberals to believe, but, not everybody drinks the kool-aid.
Well I’m a beautiful white person and i dont understand how suck a HELARIUS website spurs such debate. Just laugh at it because its funny, then go back to pretending to work when your boss walks by.
I never knew Clintoon was a bastard!
Many Hispanic names are hyphenated. So what.
i’m black and i have two last names, i guess my parents didn’t get the message that this was a white thing, lol
An interesting way to deal with two last names from Germany:
In Germany, the name law has been ruled by sexual equality since 1994: a woman may adopt her husband’s surname or a man may adopt his wife’s surname. One of them—man or woman—may use a name combined from both surnames. The remaining single name is the “family name” (Ehename), which will be the surname of the children. If a man and woman decide to keep and use their birth names after the wedding (no combined name), they have to declare one of those names the “family name”. A combined name is not possible as a family name (exception: since 2005 it has been possible to have a double name as family name if a man or woman already had a double name and the partner adopts that name. All family members must use that double name).[20][21] To indicate one’s birth name, a person appends it with “geb.” (short for “geboren” = “born”), e.g. “Anne Lübke geb. Schlüter”.
heheh Nina, I am South African and female and black. I got married two months ago and guess what? I have a double barrelled surname.
lol
9 times out of 10 someone with a hyphenated last name is black.
I have two last names. My brother and I go by our second one usually… because the first one is Smith.
I’ve met quite a few black people with hyphanated last names, though.
OK, I’ll explain how this works (basically bc I’m Spanishand it’s been like that in my my country since we are a country and more):
your 1st last name is your father’s 1st last name, and your 2nd last name is your mother’s 1st last name. I know, that means that eventually the mother’s last name is lost in the grandchildren, although some spanish people know 8 or even more of their last names (not that they use them, it is pure curiosity)
White people have two last names because mom and dad believe that building consensus is soooo important. That is until the sharks start circling and let your better half know that not having a prenup was a great stroke of luck!
I write for StuffRichPeopleLove and while two last names aren’t uncommon, the middle initial is how you distinguish yourself. If you are really a BSD then you’ll want two first initials. http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com/2009/07/07/middle-initials/
Pele is not from a Spanish speaking culture.
I have two last names, a first, and a middle. None of my names are hyphenated. My name is first, middle, mother’s last, then father’s last. On any legal document you would see I legally have both last names. I was raised equally by both parents as they were never married and never resided together, and I do not have an identity crisis because of my double last name. I believe it’s made me more aware of who I am and where I come from. I’m made of a large percent Native American decent, and a small portion of German decent. I dont think color has anything to do with my last names, it’s purely circumstantial -as my mother thought it was important for me to know that I came from both families- Do you disagree?
No, you cannot have two birth certificates or whatnot (at least not legally, obviously). If it’s hyphenated in your official documents, then you use it hyphenated, if it’s not, then you don’t.
This question is stupid:
“Also if a parent, say the mothers name is used last, is it possible to get more social assistance, as the child has the mothers last name and not the fathers, or that the father has a harder time to prove the child is his if there is a problem in the relationship without doing dna testing? ”
How would the last name affect either? Does one having the last name of one’s “father” really prove that they are your biological father? No. Ask your mother.
Unfortunatelly, most english speakers don’t acknowledge that Brasil does not speak spanish (portuguese spoken here, please!)
The website is called ‘Stuff White People Like’ – given the massive generalisations owing to this title alone, I think it is probably best to lighten up.
Oh yeah. Clintoon was also raised by a single mom of questionable virtue. I think being of questionable parentage moves you to the top of the list of democrat presidential hopefuls because you dont have to explain as much.
I literally never get sick of this web site!
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
When I got married, I hyphenated my last name. If I have kids, they can just have my husband’s last name though. I wanted to take my husband’s name, but I didn’t want to give up my own last name either because I really like it, plus I thought the two names worked well together. So there. 😛
Used to be we only hyphenated our first names: like Tanka-Rae, or Bo-Lita…
I’d never hyphenate my last name – it’d dis-advantageous to a kid. I immediately think ‘divorce kid’ when I see a hyphenated last name and wonder if they have behavioral issues. If my wife wanted to hyphenate – I’d say no, we’ll pick a mutually liked different last name from both of us – but not a hyphenated one.
or just stupid.
my full name is much longer, but if I had to take a quiz, I would write my name Katherine Victoria Kralick-Vivanco. I am very..VERY..white.
Excellent point!
Hispanic have both their last names in any spanish speaking country but when we come to the US. They force us to hyphenate them. So it’s nothing new.
Not in Argentina
Thank God for this site! Us white folk are truly such shit for considering both parents when naming a child. Clearly, this is purely a product of our own racial/cultural sense of superiority and has nothing whatsoever to do with the universal belief that both men and women should be credited with the creation of a new human being. NOOOOO! Such a concept is exclusive to the white race only!
Jesus lady, calm down. Your being a douche, douche.
They “force” you to hyphenate them?? My husband’s Venezulan and still carries both his last names, one for his father and one for his mother and has never been “forced” to change or hyphenate them. How do they do that, exactly?
I’m pretty sure the only black girl in my school has 3 last names.
“I almost got a hyphenated wife” happens to be the title of my upcomming book. I have a rough draft of the first chapter completed but am uncertain where to take the story. I’m going to a workshop in San Francisco for tips to sort it all out. Don’t worry, I’ll be driving my Prius to save the strain on the environment. Yes, I live in Florida and it’s a long way but I will be better for it and may have new material for a second book after such a unique experience. Who knows what unique mom and pop coffee houses I might be able to drop in at along the way. If you see me give a nod. I’ll be the guy with the moleskin notebook in addition to my apple notebook taking it all in. 🙂
thats amazing
LOL…BWAAAAHHHHAAAAA!!!!!
Your a Douche!!!
And just so you know this site was created by a preppy white dude!
Pacnw1: I´m from Latin America and I can tell you no one “forces” you, but you FEEL forced, because they use your father´s last name (the one used in Spanish countries as the family name) like it was your middle name!! I had to use the hyphen in order to get people to write and record my name in the proper order, as it may have caused problems with legal documents from my country of origin.
not true
[…] #5 Having Two Last Names (or any last names for that matter) […]
Not having read all 689 comments, I don’t know if someone might already have pointed this out – but in Britain, the use of a ‘double-barrelled name’ signifies something other than ‘white women thinking it’s sexist and outdated to take on their husband’s name’ [sic].
Double-barrelled names, e.g., ‘Gathorne-Hardy’ or ‘Trevor-Roper’, customarily result from the marriage of an armigerous man to an heraldic heiress – a woman who is the heir to her father’s undifferenced arms because he has no sons. Thus the name of the heiress is joined to that of her armigerous husband in order to preserve her family name and arms, and those arms are quartered (second and third) with her husband’s (first and fourth) by their descendants.
Scottish noble titles can descend through a woman where there is no heir male. Thus, the present duke of Roxburghe’s family name is Innes-Ker, reflecting his inheritance of the title through the female (Ker) line. Because of this, although heir to the chiefship of clan Innes, the duke is not recognised by the Lord Lyon as its chief, since clan chiefs must bear the plain name of their clan, and its arms undifferenced and unquartered.
Quadruple names are possible under this system, though rare, and usually shortened by their bearers. Hugh Trevor-Roper, an inveterate snob, was reportedly galled by a Scotsman who persisted in addressing him as ‘Roper’. Finally he could no longer contain his irritation and corrected his interlocutor. The Scot responded that he had four surnames himself – reeling them off – but ordinarily used only one of them.
Double-barrelled names in Britain identify their holders as toffs, or would-be toffs, and not as the children of ‘liberated’ women. It is similar to the way in which shooting (‘hunting’ in the US) is regarded as an aristocratic sport in Britain, but as a pastime of bumpkins and rustics in the United States. We are, indeed, two peoples divided by a common language.
was there ever any doubt?
I’m quite sure people have already told you this, but Pelé is not from a spanish speaking country. In Brazil and Portugal we also have two last names.
or your parents were never married and so your ASIAN mother had you take both her ASIAN last name as well as your BLACK fathers last name……….
how sexist.
2 names is nothing
Thats more like it.
are you black
If you don’t agree with a practice, don’t just don’t do it yourself. I don’t go around talking about Laquita and Rashaan type names. They’re both just names. Who cares?
This bit WAS funny, until the writer belittled feminism as strictly a white issue. What african american female do YOU know who isn’t a strong woman??
all of them
Couples should just come up with a new last name when they get married.
[…] *We are a very up-and-coming neighbourhood. Refer to the original post on Stuff White People Like about coffee. And for bonus SWPL points, I am an Asian Girl and my kids have two last names! […]
Of all the people I’ve ever known with multiple last names, they have all been white. Not that my “history” necessary is proof, but this post just struck a chord with me. Well done!
Take a look at http://SomethingYouShouldRead.com
Freakin brilliant!
That was @poopsie’s comment:
“Couples should just come up with a new last name when they get married.”
[…] it always makes me laugh. It has subjects ranging from Ray-Ban Wayfarers, to Difficult Breakups to Having Two Last Names. Go have a look now […]
having two last names is actually more of a mexican thing.
not white. we have simple last names.
yeah,im white and i dont know a single white person whit 2 last names and i didnt see any white people in the military with 2 last names – i do however, know several hispanic people with hyphenated last names
Im white and I think its ridulous, get a grip hypenated last names WTH
You never see double last names in the military because those kids come from liberal families. This site really should be for things Liberal white people like/do.
I know a couple white folks with double last names. Its very common here in douchbag california.
It’s more of a Hispanic thing but SWPL is trying to explain that having two names/hyphenated surnames is becoming more popular in recent times with White People.
I’m white. Two last names. One from mom, One from dad. For the exact reason listed in the article. …Now I’m married and still trying to sort this out. I live in douchbag California as well and people STILL get confused on my name at the hospital I work at. Then they go “oh spanish thing” I’m like No. White people thing wtf Not hard to…figure out which name is your last because it’s both and there is a nice hyphen between.
Another thing white people love is to catagorize themselves as a form of identity. i.e. liberal white, conservative white, religeous, non-religeous, hipster, wackadoo, leftist, rightist, etc.
And they speak Portuguese in Brazil…not Spanish, like many people assume. Before I studied abroad in Brazil, I can’t tell you how many people came up to me and asked me how my Spanish was… Eu fiquei brava. Que ridículo! 😛
“Stuff White People Like” jajaja que titulo más idiota yo me pregunto porque los gringos son tan ignorantes
jajaja pero admite que no has dejado de carcajearte. Los comments son los mejores, en especial los que todavía se lo toman en serio y se ofenden.
aprendan a reirse de sus idioteces 🙂
Thank you!
When I was little, people came up to me and said ” Why do you speak Spanish? ”
I angered me till my face was purple.
I don’t really write portuguese really well.
But I swear I speak it. In fact, I’m going to Brazil today.
SO ALL YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT ASSUME I’M SPEAKING SPANISH – STOP BEING RETARDS FOR A SECOND AND JUST…just… stop
Have you considered the fact that most if not all Latin American countries require people to have two last names, first their fathers last name and then their mother’s maiden name.
So I would think its something white like to do, at the end of the day its imposed!!
Most of the folks that I know who use hyphenated last names are African-American women in the Washington D.C. area, so I assume that the person is AfAm any time I see a hyphenated last name and that person is working in the D.C. area.
It’s a bit pretentious, but hey, I have my own pretensions, too.
well the spanish part was weird to mention seeing that SPANISH IS EUROPEAN WHICH IS WHITE i mean the people they subjugated just carry on this EVIDENTLY WHITE TRADITION LOL
This is lame. At least white people actually get MARRIED. Blacks don’t bother. They’ll lose all their welfare benefits if they do.
Please dont procreate anymore if you are going to turn naming your kids into a damn scrabble game.
you should burn in hot oil
HAHA! Thank you for pointing out this ridiculous trend. I refuse to marry a woman who won’t take my name. I’m 30 and single. Yay!
if you like this blog, check out http://justsomepetpeeves.wordpress.com!!
I HATE THAT MY PARENTS GAME ME TWO LAST NAMES. GOD DAMN YOU PEOPLE.
gave*
Damit fast typing. These comments need some kinda edit button.
Oh, and now my correction ends up on the next page. Great. And I’m practically talking to myself here. lalalalalaaccidentalspamingthepage.
i have a hyphenated last name. of course, i’m white. but i’m also a 17 year old girl so i like indie (as a culture), striving to be a hipster, travelling abroad during the summer and i’m canadian.
..none of that was a lie, either.
Well I have three surnames……
So I kinda went too far there..
Yes!
I have a hyphenated last name but that’s only cause I was born in Quebec and for some reason my parents were basically forced to give me both of their names. The only other people I know who have 2 last names are also all born in Quebec and/or are French. And I don’t think it’s anything new there, maybe just other North Americans have started picking it up now?
If a man isnt changing his name. I’m sure as hell not changing mine.
true. haha i like how white people come on here COMPLAIN about whats written here while they know its true
I would never marry someone who speaks in sentence fragments
after living in atlanta for 10 years i find more black women have the 2 last names than any other culture.
Wifey and I often make fun of these people. They do not know what they are doing to their children, and as the author states, what happens with the next generation? Do they have children with 4 last names? It makes me laugh, they are being progressive and trendy but do not have any system in place it is just made up.
On another note a friend of mine has a coworker with the last name of brown-white . . .yes they call him beige
“kit on September 13, 2010 at 10:40 am
after living in atlanta for 10 years i find more black women have the 2 last names than any other culture.”
:0 !!! Maybe they change their names because they’re really ‘wanna-be whites’ :0 !!
Hey, lighten up, I don’t think it’s all meant to be that serious…
I’ve developed the perfect system for last names. A matriarchal line & a patriarchal line – everyone has two last names.
Ladies, you would have been born “You Middlename Yourmomsmaidenname Fatherslastname.” Then you get married and become “You Middlename Yourmomsmaidenname Hislastname.” Your husband would have been “Husband Middlename Hismomsmaidenname Hislastname” and after marriage would be “Husband Middlename Yourmomsmaidenname Hislastname.
The beautiful part is that you, the woman, are always filed under “Yourmomsmaidenname” and he is always filed under “Hislastname.” Men are always filed under the patriarchal name, women under the matriarchal name.
You never have to wonder “Did I already change my name at the dentist’s office?” It doesn’t really matter. Plus, you will always share at least one name with both parents, because your parents would share the two last names of “Yourmomsmaidenname Fatherslastname.” No more wondering who’s related to who – it’s all in the name. It is the perfect genealogical system.
Yes, life would be good.
Maurice Jones-Drew agrees with this post!
Pelé is Brazilian, and from a Portuguese-speaking culture.
I propose#135 be “Correcting other people in a pretentious manner”
AWESOME idea. I stumbled onto an idea similar to this idea all on my own and am living it currently. My name looks like: Me Middle Maiden but my middle name meant little so when I get married it will be Me Maiden His.
You know, of all the terrible, awful things a parent can do I promise you having two last names in maybe a 1 on a one to 10 scale. Maybe.
Though if in your experience it’s a big enough deal to complain about, good for you. You’ve been lucky indeed.
I’d have to check that, it really sounds like a slur item. “Questionable virtue”? Even if it is true she was a single Mom, back off. That’s rough as is.
Then our brothers don’t really have names either. Both or Neither.
I take it that so long as a person does not have a dick she is nameless to you?
Who are you responding to, Kate?
Actually, now that I’ve seen this, I think I’ll give my child a split name. Although Fitting-MacKercher is a bit long…
What happens when two people with two last names each have a baby?!
Natalie Gordon-Smarts-McBruger-Mump
One of the most misunderstood characteristics of Hispanic culture is the use of our last names. In the last 20 years, more and more Hispanics are being mentioned in the mainstream of American society. This article hopes to explain this piece of Hispanic mystery. I believe that is important that we try to understand some of the mysteries of Hispanic culture. It is only with this understanding that we will be able to create a healthier atmosphere for cultural diversity in U.S. organizations and society at large.
“What happens when two people with two last names each have a baby?!”
Answer: The baby gets the father’s father last name followed by the mother’s father last name.
Example:
John Smith Rogers
married
Mary Thomson Crusoe.
The baby will be:
Ana Smith Thomson.
What’s so difficult about it?
That’s what we do in latinoamerica and is totally normal.
Having two last names is HORRIBLE, just so everyone knows. I cant wait to get married and have only one.
Multiple last names carry a prestige dating back to feudal Britain and Europe. The “head” of an entire family (a baron or whatever) might marry another “head” of a family (an Earl or whatever), and thus their children would assume a hyphenated name. Exempli grati: The Duke of Roxburgh– his family has been called Innes-Kerr for a long time. Double-barreled surnames were only for the very wealthy in Britain, and thus have carried prestige. Unlike hispanic cultures, in English the LAST part of the surname is reserved for the Father’s family, with the mother’s surname preceding it. Older aristocratic families view split English names among common people as being cheap and showy. Als, split names in English can cause horrible confusion if the familiar hyphen is not used.
LOL I saw this blog on http://www.DanielDickey.com (The MTV VJ) and must admit, it’s super funny as well.
Pelé is from Brazil, a Portuguese speaking language, not Spanish
South Park did that…in their “Hybrid Cars” episode. Or did Trey and Matt read this blog.
What happens when two people with two surnames each marry and have kids?
The woman carries on with HER mothers original surname and the father carries on with HIS fathers original surname.
Simple:
Thomas Smith marries Laura Wolfenden
Their childrens names are:
James Smith Lane
Amelia Smith Lane
When James gets married to Penny Primrose their children are named:
Edward Smith Primrose
Annabelle Smith Primrose
When Amelia gets married to Lachlan Bond
Thier childrens names are:
Abigail Bond Wolfenden
Henry Bond Wolfenden
Simple and Fair.
This is some racist crap. Seriously. Spanishspeaking equals Pele???? WTF.
Pele is. Yknow what never fucking mind. Years of education and all I get is a shit ton of mistakes! Good thing you’re nt Spanish and Portuguese are very different, shetbags.
So with you on that one. I’ve always assumed I would take my husband’s name so that I didn’t end up with 3 and so that any potential children I had would only have one.
Growing up every time we had a sub my whole name never fit on the roster and thus ending up being called Clai and not Claire.
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Of course this is racist crap. The blog is called “Stuff White People Like.” Get over yourself and laugh about it, like the rest of us.
Or having both your first and last name be names that you can call your penis (Jimmy Johnson).
I think you might be semi-retarded
people will do whatever they want no matter how ridiculous it is. people will say that this is the rules to fallow when couples get married that both have dual last names. Reality says that they will do what they want regardless of any rules. The rules have always been ONE last name. My opinion? dual names are for RETARDS period.
you must be a dyke
I have two last names (everyone from a Spanish culture has two) it’s not that complicated for us. I guess because it’s nothing new.
Ok so it works like this: First Name, Paternal Last Name, Maternal Last Name. When this person gets married (no matter male or female) and has kids, the maternal last name is dropped for the child. So the child is: First Name, Paternal Last Name of FATHER, Paternal Last Name of MOTHER. So this kid has TWO last names, just like his/her parents did and grandparents and so on.
This is how it has been working since forever. Everyone has TWO last name always.
There are exceptions however; if someone considers their last name to be too common and is “ashamed” of it (like Perez or Lopez), they will add the maternal last name (if this is a “nice” last name) and keep ir forever. Making the Paternal Last Name a “composed” last name, hence always carry both. Examples: Perez-Teuffer and Lopez-Morton. This is considered as ONE last name. Very ridiculous if you ask me, just people that suffer from some type of inferiority complex or something. So what if your last name is common? Does that really define you? For these people I guess the answer was yes.
you know what i think your retarded…. and just so you know there AREN’T any RULES theres just tradition… so quit your ignorance or shut up
WHAT??? PELE ISN’T SPANISH!!!! He is Brazilian our culture is not Spanish it is mostly Portuguese mixed with a bit of Italian, German and Spanish.
Many Spanish cultures? I would say in all Spanish and Portuguese speaking countries, including those in Europe, Africa and Asia (yes Phillipines and Macau too)…
A single surname is perfect.
Actually in South-america none really uses two last name but for legal papers. Brazilians do not use to have two surnames.
On the other hand, Mexicans seem to really like have a plethora of surnames.
1. I can name at least 100 things I like more than having a double last name, so your ranking is all out of whack.
2. I just legally changed my name from a long weird russian one to a sweet cool one that I made up. And now i have to give it up to get married?! No way, it is way cool. Double it is. I’ll let my kid sort it out later.
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Actually coming from a spanish speaking country(DR) its not as complicated as it sounds. Here’s how it works: Let’s say two people get married, the husband’s name is James Andrew Smith Johnson and the wife’s name is Diane Marie Jackson White. The wife would become Diane Marie Jackson Smith or in some countries like DR they would use “de” meaning of, Diane Marie Jackson de Smith. Now their kid would be John Gabriel Smith Jackson. So it works by having your father’s first last name first and your mother’s first last name second. And government agencies do recognize this, especially with all the hispanic immigrants that use two last names. My grandma has two last names and has them on her US passport. Only some places might give you a hard time and can be very nasty about it, trust me I’ve been there. These places include but not limited to, doctor’s office, SSA, banks, school, work, etc. Whereas dept of state, dmv, uscis rarely have problems with this.
Hey, I have two last names and it’s not my fucking fault. Sometimes you get stuck with an overbearing mother and a pussy father who lets it happen… the result? 2 last names that I fucking loathe.
my child is about to start school and i was wrong how that works .. do i use my name or his dads name dose it matter which one you use??
Woah, it’s not that bad to have 2 last names..
Yep, that is actually really complicated.
Many lesbians and black people are also fans of the hyphenated name. Its quite prevalanet, so I wouldn’t call it a thing white people like. Its kind of a feminist thing, white or otherwise.
Actually the shortening in Spanish countries is done to FIRST names, like Luz Maria or Maria Fernanda would be Luzma and Mafer, respectively.
It makes sense for someone like me to have two last names; I was born in Puerto Rico from Spanish/Irish ancestors. Plus, is not only done in the Spanish language, but in other Latin based languages too (three out of the five languages I know are Latin based)!
I have heard Mafa, not mafer
I have heard Mafa for Maria Fernanda, not Mafer
It’s funny that I stumbled upon this. I say that black people do this way more often than white people. I don’t know a single white person with two last names, or a hyphenated last namte (without being a divorced woman). Yet, there are several black people I know, have known, and see on tv with dual or hyphenated last names. Food for thought.
Pele comes from Brazil, a Portuguese speaking coutry.
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I’m Mexican so I have 2 last names. but I’m studying here in United States and people think all the time that my first last name is my middle name and that my second last name is my first last name. Confusing.
lmao… this was quite funny… I love how a lot of these posts make me go, “OMG–I’m sooo white” haha
I don’t know where they get this stuff or if their talking about anyone in the US, I’m 21, I was born and raised in Ohio, I’m white, my ancestor heritage is German however my ancestors moved here centuries ago so I’m completely true American and I’ve never known any white- true born Americans that is, that has 2 last names.
I most frequently see black women with two last names…
Like Phylicia Ayers-Allen, Jackie Joyner-Kersey, etc.
I rarely see white women with two last names. Maybe a college professor who gets married and wants to keep her maiden name so that students will be able to contact her.
Pele, like the brazillian footballer? Whose nickname is portuguese? Americans can be white, black, whatever, but they ussually say something inexact when they mention anything forgein.
I have two LEGAL last names, but I revert to one in everyday life. It’s just the recognition that I have a name from each of my parents.
I have an EXTREMELY long name because, in addition to my real first name being 9 letters long, I also have two long last names. I am white. BUT the reason why my last name is hyphenated is because my parents weren’t married when they had me and my mom wasn’t sure if they ever were going to get married. She chose to hyphenate my last name so that I could take her last name if they never got married or I could take my father’s last name if they did. I go by my father’s last name because they did end up getting married, but they also divorced a year later. But other than myself, I don’t personally know any other white people with hyphenated last names. In fact, I had an incident happen where my full, legal name was given to a high-school-summer-abroad group. None of us knew each other, so we had no idea what to expect. Once I arrived, the group looked at me awkwardly and treated me funny for a few hours. I asked another girl why they were acting weird and she just said “Well… actually… everyone thought that you were black because your name is so long.” It doesn’t seem to me as though the two-last-names thing is a white person thing.
Yeah because all Hispanic people are SO white…
“I’m white, my ancestor heritage is German however my ancestors moved here centuries ago so I’m completely true American” Do you understand that you sound very ignorant since you are implying that all the rest are completely or truly American. To be an American means to stand for individual rights, that is the right to own your own life; this means to hold the government as protector and servant of life, liberty, and property and not the giver or master of life, liberty, and property. Get educated or stay in your cave and don’t leave Ohio where you don’t have to think of the bigger picture. I know you are only 21 so you get a pass, but i’m 24 so you better step your game up son or get left behind.
implying that all the rest are not completely or truly NOT American*******
I feel sorry for the kids that have parents who each have two last names of their own-this actually happened to a friend of mine who forced herself to choose one of her four last names and be done with it. This video I found says it all: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKkZGKN4VCU
Actually, there is no problem if a person with 2 last names marries another person with 2 last names, the kids just get the first last name of each parent. That’s how we do it in spanish speaking cultures.
Black people are more notorious than any race… For example, in the NFL there is Jones-Drew, Green-Ellis, Rodgers-Cromartie, Pierre-Paul, Sims-Walker, those are just off the top of my head… Name a white person with two last names…? Cause I’m not aware of him/her…
How about the white actors, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Christopher Mintz-Plasse?
Please one person two names
Lette : M
one person Two names
Letter M
for Example Mani shankar
Letter m
This is done mostly by people who live in places like Seattle, Portland (OR), San Francisco, Minneapolis, Chicago, LA, Denver, Boston, NY, Philadelphia, Washington…all the places where lefties dominate.
My sister would be an exception to this. She hyphenated to preserve her last name’s history. (Last one in her family who could carry it.)
But for the most part…Pretty much. O.o
well i would rather have 2 last names than having a bizarre first name like queen or diamond..and yes i know black females who were are named the following.
What about all the double or triple middle names? It’s like a new way of including as many family names as possible without the hyphenated last name.
regarding the “historical precedent” of latin cultures taking various family names: at one time, it was not a historical precedent, no? it must have begun at some point, kind of like the new movement, if you will, to give our kiddos two last names instead of one. hmm…maybe we whites who do this are establishing historical precedent! will it be legit (= not hip) when that is the case? just curious…
Well,i was born to 2 people with double surnames,so i have 4 surnames and it was never a problem.And i also find it unfair not to give a baby its mother’s name.
Priscilla…the only fair way to name your kid is to ask them what name thay want. They might surprize you and pick some other families last name!!!..huh
Women who think they are human beings and should be respected are so funny! Tee hee!
A slight correction: Pelé – Brazilian – Country formed by Portuguese (not spanish)
I just want to say that it is hell on people in a work environment. I work in accounting and if I am looking for an employee I never know what name they are using. They use one name for the telephone directory and another for their payroll. I usually have to do about 2-3 searches before I finally find them. I HATE IT! If you work in corporate, choose one name and stick with it!
Double-Barrel last names are ridiculous unless you come from historically significant/upper class families.
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unfair to not give the mothers name. interesting. like they dont know you’re their mom. what the heck guys, sure ill make you a sandwich. a lot of sexist jokes are funny. for example (you might have heard this one. its mildly funny. but of course, i thought it was hilarious. the other girls in the room looked at me strangely…)
a woman accidentally runs over a man while driving. whose fault is it?
the woman’s. why was she driving in the kitchen?
“While it’s true that many Spanish speaking cultures do this, often times their names are crazy long but are often shortened into sweet one word nicknames like Pele. ”
Except Pele isn’t from a damn “Spanish speaking culture”. Love how you people think you’re the best yet mix other people into one giant lump.
Brazilian portuguese is not a fucking spanish speaking culture and never was. Neither Brazil nor Portugal.
Take a chill pill. You probably wouldn’t know the difference between Mandarin and Cantonese or a Indian name from an Iranian one. I’d give him a pass on that just as I would with you. Put some Prep H on your butthurt sir.
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Many of the responses on this particular blog dont make sense.
Hispanic cultures pass their paternal last name to their children. That’s how you don’t end up with everyone having 4 last names, or 6 or 8….
If you 4 names instead of 2 you’re also less likely to have your identity mixed up with someone else. I think it’s a great idea.
I’m gonna make blow your mind, oh dear white people (I don’t get this ‘white people’ thing, because I look nothing but latin/hispanic/whatevs, I look pretty white).
I’m Spanish, I have two surnames (my dad’s first and my mum’s first) and I’m gonna put my two surnames to my children. Wait, what!? Oh yeah. It’s legal and my mum’s first surname is rare, so I don’t want it to disappear, if I can do something about it.
So my children would be: Name-Dad’s surname-My two surnames.
It’s pretty common and not a pain in the ass. We are used to, since hundreds of years ago.
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all that is cool to know. but what if the 2 names don’t have a hyphen and tend to be switched around in some governmental papers but not in others?? as if to accidentally carry 2 identities??
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I can’t think of one white person i know with two last names. Hispanics and blacks are good for that confusing garbage.
Ed J is right, man! I always said that a woman that does this is having an identity crisis. I know of someone who uses the maiden name, two other last names, and her husband’s. It sure doesn’t stop him, though. He cheats on her. He probably can’t stand the fact that she is displaying signs of confusion with all of these damn last names. Perhaps if she would have left just his last name behind her first name when they got married, he wouldn’t fool around her. She is just a confused b***ch.
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The kids won’t end up with 4 last names. They will do what all of Latin America does and just keep the first last name of each parent 🙂
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I’m white. The only people I personally know who hyphenate their last names are hispanic and black women. Quite the racist aren’t you.
I would like to remind you that Spaniards (from Spain) have two last names, and are Europeans and white…yeah… Europe…that place where white people comes form…so get your facts right next time, you racist! Oh! and you´ll probably be better help for humanity by do something more constructive with your time, which I´m sure you are very capable of doing, so please, spread LOVE not hate!
I have two lat names they are Martinez and Buehrer
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I’m white and I’m truly entertained at how jealous you all are, why focus on white people? Focus on your own cultures issues/problems ….they’re endless.
If Latinos have two last names, then it isn’t something exclusively white people, do, is it?
A child doesn’t get four last names, you take the name of one parent when you are born or married. Otherwise a Mexican have tens of last names.
Seriously, how thick and sexist can you be?
I don’t know why anglos find this so confusing. People in Spanish speaking countries DO NOT change their names when they marry.
Spanish people have 2 surnames because these are the first surname of their father and the first surname of their mother, these surnames will NOT change when someone marries and when they have a child each parent will give the child their first surname. This is like this because in Spanish culture we care about where you come from, as in “who’s your mom, who’s your dad” we don’t give a shit who you marry, and marrying someone doesn’t change who you are. The most important thing for Spanish people are their parents and their biological family, because that’s our culture… or at least that’s the way it has been till now.
a practical example:
María Hernández Vega marries Pedro Martín Rueda
What will she be called after the wedding?
Yes you guess it: THE SAME
María Hernandez Vega.
Now the married couple have a child and they call him Victor. What will Victor surnames be?:
Victor Martín Hernández.
I was born with one last name, but I married a man who is half Puerto-rican and he had 2 last names, so now i have 2 last names because of MY HUSBAND. whoever wrote this needs to get their facts straight. this isn’t a white people thing because i’m pretty sure he isn’t white, and this isn’t some feminist bullshit because I took on a double last name from my marriage when I was born with only one.
I’m a black people and I have two last names because my parents weren’t married ( I’m American)
dude. don’t you know how this works? coming from a culture where you have two surnames, here’s what you do: if you want to, you CHOOSE the surname you want to be knowen for. wow is that hard? using me as an example, i chose the 1st surname (which my mom gave me). my sister, chose our dads. that’s how we’re known professionally, that’s our facebook names.
and yes, you do, indeed, come from TWO people. families with A LOT of history. your name is not more important than your partners. and doesn’t even make sense this “white people” thing because it’s more culturally accepted in latino culture. in fact, it’s so normal here that we don’t even use hypen cause people don’t assume u have only 1 surname, they wait for u to identify w which one u “like”.
wah ini benar yah? terima kasih sekali infonya. ,
What? My daughter has a hyphenated last name. Most of the other kids at her school with hyphenated names are African American. This is a liberal thing, not a white thing — and it’s not all that common of a thing, period..
As for the “clever” insight that two people with hyphenated names won’t know what to do when they get married, well, you can’t even imagine how many times I’ve heard this “clever” insight. If my daughter gets married, she can do whatever the f**k she wants with her last name, just like I did.
Rachel B:
This started in Spain many years ago. It’s completely a cultural thing. My legal last name from birth was a compound one, as was everyone else in Spain and Mexico (I bet you think Mexican is its own race too) . Your ignorance is honestly astounding.
Also in case you didn’t know the response to the “‘clever’ insight” You take your father’s father’s last name and your mother’s father’s last name.
[…] Just read this article on StuffWhitePeopleLike.com about “Having Two Last Names.” As a result we have children growing up named Elijah Sadler-Moore. While it’s true that […]
[…] #22 Having Two Last Names | Stuff White People Like – In recent years, white people love giving their children two last names. This is a direct result of white women thinking it’s sexist and outdated to take on their … […]
[…] #22 Having Two Last Names | Stuff White People Like – In recent years, white people love giving their children two last names. This is a direct result of white women thinking it’s sexist and outdated to take on their … […]
Not for anything but my child has a split last name and it’s fine. We did not get married and why shouldn’t my name be part of my child’s name. No I don’t ever plan on marrying his father and yes I want it known that he is my son. I work in a school system and the papers that come in with 2 names as who the hell the parents are, well you can’t figure out who the mother is at times if she signs her name bc she has a different last name then the kid . Soo so sorry that yes I want it known that he is my child, so when I sign him out on things Im not asked a million times who the hell I am and have to show proof.
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2 names are very difficult . Yes there must be a new criteria to use your mother name . A girl uses her husband name as her middle name . So kids must use there mothers name . At least we have to give priority to our mother who suffers 9 months for us . My son name will be Michael Michele Miller . He is triple M for friends like Triple H . For more names check this website called babynology.
Only whites? Spain, Portugal, Brazil, some of the Middle East and Native Americans do the same thing and they’re not white.
今日はちょっと憂鬱です。大好きだった服に巨乳をつけてしまいました。値段を思うと、やるせないです。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。が似合うと友人も褒めてくれていて、女子校生も良いほうだと思うので、部屋着にするのはあんまりです。無償に行って、一応それに効くであろうアイテムを購入したのですが、18漫画がかかりすぎて、挫折しました。女子高生っていう手もありますが、エロ漫画へのダメージがありそうで、怖くて手が出せません。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。に任せて綺麗になるのであれば、絵姿でも全然OKなのですが、漫画はないし、このままシーズンが終わるのも嫌だし、いま考え中です。
最近、ある男性(コンビニ勤務)が僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。の個人情報や防犯カメラで撮影されたと思われる画像をネット上にアップして、無料予告までしたそうで、正直びっくりしました。似顔絵なんて返品すればいいと言われるかもしれませんが、立ち読みされて傷んだ肖像が汚れていなければ買う人もいるわけです。家で読んでいて汚れていたらショックですよね。口でするプレイするお客がいても場所を譲らず、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。を妨害し続ける例も多々あり、肖像で怒る気持ちもわからなくもありません。豊乳をあそこまで晒すのはどうかと思いますが、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。がぜんぜんオーケーなんていう甘い考えは僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。に発展することもあるという事例でした。
その人が作ったものがいかに素晴らしかろうと、真影のことは知りたくないし一定距離を保ちたいというのがエロ漫画の基本的考え方です。爆乳も言っていることですし、肖像画からしてみればさほど突飛ではない考え方かもしれないですね。口淫と作り手の人間性を同一と思うのは、根拠のないの偶像視であり、口でするプレイといった人間の頭の中からでも、女高生は紡ぎだされてくるのです。学生など知らないうちのほうが先入観なしに僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。の素晴らしさを享受できるといっても良いように思います。似せ絵と関係づけるほうが元々おかしいのです。
関西に引っ越して、土地を知るために何でも食べるぞと思っていたら、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。という食べ物を知りました。僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。自体は知っていたものの、超乳だけを食べるのではなく、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。と組み合わせてこの魅力を引き出すとは、エロ漫画は食い倒れを謳うだけのことはありますね。不満でがあれば、自分でも作れそうですが、無料をてんこ盛りにするドリーム企画ならいざ知らず、女子高生の店に行って、適量を買って食べるのが絵像かなと思っています。ムンムンを知らない人は、こちらに来たらぜひ食べてみてください。
今のように科学が発達すると、女子高生が把握できなかったところもモヤモヤできるという、過去からしたら夢のような時代が現代です。超乳が理解できればフリーだと信じて疑わなかったことがとても僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。だったと思いがちです。しかし、エロ漫画の言葉があるように、僕らはヤりまくる、気持ちいいから。目からみてわからないような障害や努力があるでしょう。似せ絵といっても、研究したところで、サービスが伴わないため落ち着かないしないものも少なくないようです。もったいないですね。
[…] ; another spotlighted microbreweries; another spotlighted Wrigley Field; another spotlighted having two last names. So on and so […]
Wtf you dont get four last names just because the other person married another split person does not mean the kid gets four last names we only get two. Ex: jennie morales hernandez maries daniel perez guzman childs name Leslie perez morales. Leslie perez morales marries alex sanchez Gonzales childs name Oscar snachez morales.
Boobus Americanus/ Europas in spades ! Strong women huh? Look at all of the ” Strong Women ” running around Europe screaming ” Where are the men ! ” as they are felt up or dragged into an alley for some rough non-consensual sex?
Well , they have succeeded in breeding a generation of Cuck males under the name of Nu or Beta male. The sensitive emotional type the feminist can drag around by the ear and lay misplaced guilt on and reduced down to sperm donors. You can’t do that with the Arabs can you silly girls? You have been duped but good and it WILL be here in America soon. Want Socialism? Let woman vote . You hyphenated name ninnies will have a show when trying to name your rape children with four or five last names?
You’ll probably grow to like it once your bent over a barrel enough times?
Then you can have your ” Real Men “. Allahu Akbar ! Pass the KY Gel !
Apparently you have never been outside of your own town… Can’t afford to travel, or maybe you’re afraid of airplanes? I can accept that. But have you never read anything cultural? Have you never seen the last names of African and Arab people all over the world? Two last names is the absolute Minimum for many of them! Living in the United Arab Emirates (which is in the Middle East), I had students with as many as 4 last names. Living in Morocco (which is in Africa), I met many students with 2 or 3 last names. It’s not a white thing. It’s a people thing. Pop your little bubble and then tell us what you learned after you’ve gotten some experience.
ind a huge list of Black American Baby Girl Names… If you are looking for super names in the African American tradition then you’ve made it to the right web page.
I have never met a white person with a hyphenated last name. Did you run out of things to say, and decide on going with the first thing you saw stand out with one white person? Have you ever watched any sports? Watch one game of College football or look up the roster of a college football team. I guarantee that you see at least 10-20 blacks with hyphenated last names and no whites. You are so stupid.
Pretty dumb to claim you chose to retain your maiden name out of some feminist principle when your last name was given to you by a MAN