#32 Vegan/Vegetarianism
January 27, 2008 by clander
As with many white people activities, being vegan/vegetarian enables them to feel as though they are helping the environment AND it gives them a sweet way to feel superior to others. For further evidence, note how the vegetarian world has increasing levels of extemism (no meat, no dairy, no eggs, no fish, nothing that has been cooked, etc).
Much like not watching TV, this makes white people pretty hard to deal with on a day to day basis – having dinner, going to restaurants, having them over to watch political debates all become major challenges as they will talk about how they cannot eat anything and would rather that the meat and cheese be thrown in the garbage than put into their bodies.
But wait, aren’t there white people who eat organice, grain fed, free range cattle and chicken? Yes, these white people are wracked with guilt knowing that they are eating a dead animal, contributing to rainforest deforestation, and global warming.
Whether you are dealing with a meat eater or a vegan/vegetarian, there are many ways to use this information to your advantage.
If you require a favor from a vegetarian white person, you should invite them to a dinner with your family. When your mother/grandmother offers them a dish with meat in it, they will reject it saying that they are vegetarian. When the meal is over, tell them that your mom is very embarrassed, and that in your culture rejecting food is the equivalent of spitting on someone’s grave. They will then owe you favor, this can be repeated when you need trips to the airport, someone to help you move, a small interest free loan, or a place for your friend to crash.
If you need to gain leverage with a meat eater, it’s pretty easy. They already feel guilty, just point it out.
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I definitely wasn’t brought up to be vegetarian, but have now been lacto-vegetarian for 23 years, more than half my life.
During my 1970s childhood in the upper midwest, many people ate red meat for dinner 3-4 times a week or more. As a dinner guest, one generally expected to be served something like roast beef or meatballs with mashed potatoes/gravy and frozen peas or green beans. This changed after people started to worry about cholesterol in the 1980s, when fish and “skinless, boneless, and tasteless” chicken breasts became popular.
Long before meat was an ethical issue for me, it was a disgust issue. I despised rare and/or fatty red meat, and preferred processed chicken strips (long before they were trendy!) to regular chicken. My favorite meat was canned tuna.
In junior high, without any definite “plan” to become vegetarian, I gradually started eliminating meat from my diet. Most pork went first, followed by most beef except cube steak and hamburgers. By the time I was in high school, I only ate red meat on pizza. When I started college, I gave up chicken, ate more fish, and ordered vegetarian pizza. At age 20, I decided the fish could go as well.
In general, I think that if people want to eat animals, they should be willing to kill them. I’m not saying people should hunt and/or fish for everything they eat, they just should be willing to do so on occasion. I used to fish as a child and although I liked to eat the fish, I always felt sorry for them. . .so now I don’t eat them.
Factory farming is horrible. If you want to eat eggs and chicken (relatively) ethically on a budget, raise your own chickens! Believe it or not, some cities allow this.
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@ Soy, what a fruitcake…..
I’ve never been over weight in my life, and don’t see a reason to sit down to a meal if there isn’t any meat on the table….
nor do I excercise 4 mins a day let alone 4 hours…. I do eat more vegetables since I married my Asian wife 13 years ago, the only difference I can see is, I’m more ‘regular’ than I was before I got married….I don’t think ‘regular’ can be blamed entirely on the extra vegetables either..xDDD
you can “imagine” you are healthier than meat eaters, hell… you can even pretend to be superior…. just realize its yourself you are fooling, nobody else buy’s it, and the evidence doesn’t prove it out…. xDDDD
Last time I checked, Asians ate meat. I’m veg because I don’t like the taste of meat, but the only way to stay skinny and healthy is to exercise at least four hours a day. Go ahead and get offended.
[...] has some very good primers. It’s not natural. It’s not organic. It’s not stupid. So when these delicious deprived individuals get a small hint of greasy, fleshy Americana, they [...]
I’m wondering why producing, *good, clean, envirowhacko friendly energy*, has never proposed this as an obviouse solution to our dependence on foriegn oil…..
large hamster wheels for ppl to run on, connected to a generator that charges the batteries in your electric car, house, appliances, ect… ect… ect….
With unemployment at record lvls, illigal immigration unabated, and human hamster wheels almost an entirely unregulated….. this IS the future of the green wave….
get entirely off the grid, or sell your extra energy back to the grid….
Its also the answer to the fat ass epidemic, and will dramatically reduce healthcare costs by guaranteeing energy demands are met with actual physical excercise……
or for the most green fruitcakes among us, they can get special cards allowing them to barter the extra energy they produce for the gov’t cheese they recieve!!!!
*WIN WIN WIN* xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
With as feckless and incompetent an ass clown as we have squatting in the White House right now, I don’t see how he could possibly overlook the possibilities…… more reliable and cost effective than wind energy, the job opportunities in this new *tech* guaranteeing more employment than the WW2 war effort, these jobs are available now……
Easily sellable to the public by showing him, his fat ass wife, and kids actively doing their part to power the White House, on live TV……. xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Then a lot of these vegan ass clowns could say they were really doing something for the *environment* xDDDDDD
What a white response lol. Here’s some news, cutting what you eat to stay skinny doesn’t make you healthy if you don’t exercise. So many white people I know are vegan because they want to stay skinny but don’t want to exercise and they would explode if they weren’t vegan…
theveganstudent is the reason that it’s so easy to make fun of vegetarians.
i’ve been a vegetarian for 21 years, and i don’t take stuff like this so seriously. this is comedy (and pretty funny), not journalism. people only make a big deal out of your diet if you do.
also keep in mind that despite commonalities, not everyone in a particular group is the same; therefore a joke about vegetarians isn’t necessarily about you.
actually it is highly unlikely that someone who doesn’t know you is writing something about you on the internet, period. just something to keep in mind.
sorry I didn’t finish that sentence. I meant, in 50 years, when I will look and act 15 years younger than I am, there will be nothing to say.
I actually became vegan mostly because I want to be thin and healthy. Yes the meat industry is totally gross and wrong. And yes there is something to be said for the fact that fat is part of a healthy diet, but what other species drinks breast milk as adults? Let alone another species’ breast milk? That is plain weird. Baby cows gain at least 1,000 pounds in the two years that they are drinking their mother’s milk. Yes yogurt and ice cream are delicious, but I would rather not look like a baby cow. Maybe back in the day when people were running around hunting and gathering and then farming all day long and burning calories like crazy it was practical to eat dead animals and drink their milk and eat their unfertilized sex cells because of all the energy they provide. If your thing is that civilization would not be what it is today without cooked meat, um hello Asia and soy products. Who does the United States owe trillions of dollars to? That is one successful civilization, monetarily at least (maybe not so much with human and environmental rights). I think it is so funny that people care so much about what other people do with their lives when it comes to vegan and vegetarianism. People on the Atkin’s diet don’t get criticized for eating crazy. Personally, pounds of bacon does not seem like a great way to lose weight. But hey, if it works for you get to it. In 50 years, when I will look and act 15 years younger than I am,
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