Because white tastes in shoes can change so quickly, it’s not recommended that you ever talk to a white person about shoes. Over the years they have embraced (and eventually disowned) Uggs, Birkenstocks, Earth Shoes, and most recently Crocs. If it’s popular, the chances are that the clock is ticking down to it’s imminent doom. One mention of your affinity for selected footwear could undo all of your hard work.
There is, however, one exception: New Balance running shoes. All white people own a pair! Seriously, next time you are at a casual party where guests are encouraged to take off their shoes take a look by the door at the veritable rainbow of New Balance sneakers.
But why do white people love them so uniformly? It is pretty simple really. A few years ago it came out that Nike (and other manufacturers) were producing their shoes in Asian sweatshops and then selling them for a very high profit margin. White people were outraged, they generally prefer that children in developing nations first finish high school before working in shoe-producing sweatshops. Otherwise they might look foolish when their co-workers are talking about Catcher in the Rye.
This enormous guilt over child labor meant that white people started to stop wearing Nike shoes. Subsequently they were left to find a company that used fair labor practices to make shoes for the sports that they loved most: jogging, hiking, cross-country running, marathons, walking and being seen in retro-sneakers.
With factories in New England (include three in Maine!) and an extensive lineup of shoes that were meant only for running, New Balance was in the ideal position to both produce and distribute a product to the lucrative markets of white people conveniently located in the region. They quickly spread nationally and joined outdoor performance clothes as an essential part of the white uniform.
When you meet a person wearing New Balance shoes it is a good idea to ask them about the marathon for which they are inevitably training. If they say “I’m not training for a marathon,” this is a good opportunity to raise your status by saying “oh, I thought only runners wore those. My running club all wear New Balance except for a few jerks who won’t shut up about Asics. I’m still a bit sore from the 10k run this morning.”
This is an extremely effective move since white people who jog are generally viewed as being better than white people who don’t. Although perhaps it’s more accurately stated that white people who jog feel the need to constantly prove they are better than white people who don’t.
Note: It is considered a legendary white male move to play basketball in a pair of New Balance. Lots of layups.
Stuff White People Like 
First!
“out raged”
This should be a single word.
its all about AND 1
AO AO HOT SIZZLE HOT SIZZLE
lots of layups? or assists?
definitely no dunks.
White people seem to like really lame blogs like stuffwhitepeoplelike. How about bloggin on that?
White people like funny stuff, Adam.
Sorry, I only rock Pearl Izumi. Old men wear New Balance.
I own 2 pairs and I love wearing them with shorts when I play 3 on 3 with the guys.
I’m not gonna lie, I use them because my feet are fucking huge and I need to fit into my running shoes.
For the most part, I don’t even wear close-toed shoes unless I’m running. I pretty much switch between my Rainbows and top-siders.
I’m definitely one of those jerks who won’t shut up about Asics. ‘Cept I’m not white, I just think I am. Great blog, keep it up.
I thought white people liked wearing “Chuck Taylor” basketball shoes so they could appear authentic and “old school.” How about New Balance stores in super-white suburbs? I like how he discussed another prevalent white hobby- jogging, and all the pretentious self-congratulation that goes along with it.
Other commenters have noted that perhaps the spelling and grammar mistakes on this blog are intentional and used to demonstrate the irony of white people’s obsession with grammar. I thought they were right, but now I’m not so sure. Maybe you should hire someone to proofread your postings now that you have a book deal.
I am an English teacher though, and white, so maybe my opinion doesn’t count.
So true. Back when I ran cross-country in high school, my best friend (who happened to be white) was a Nike freak. But once his dad bought him a pair of New Balances, he was hooked. No more than a year later, the fad of wearing the plain-grey 574s was in fashion with EVERY white person I knew.
Guess I was behind the curve when I got my Prestos.
Haha, Great Post!
http://englishfail.wordpress.com
it’s tough being white, so many rules. can I quit.
Grammar mistakes aside, your blog always makes me chuckle.
White Guy, here…
My high school wrestling coach (Black Guy) wore New Balances because, as he was fond of telling us:
“The N stands for Nigga!!!”
actually, while many white people like NBs, onitsuka’s are really gaining headway on them (as are adidas originals) in the “oh you’re wearing those, i can tell that you’re white from your footwear” category
what about adidas’ shell toes? keep in touch with the old school hip hop community?
I don’t own a pair of New Balance shoes. I’m a discredit to my race. I’m so ashamed.
I do have many pairs of clogs, though!
“Jesus was a black man lynched Italian style.”
“Jesus was a black man lynched Italian style.”
They have the widest toe-box of running-shoe makers, therefore they fit me best.
What a concept, wearing a shoe because it fits :p
Phew, I was worried something had happened to you for a while there. Keep up the good work, Christian, white people love to follow something for a long time and say “it’s never lost its edge!”
Tigers are on their way up, but as the blog suggests don’t buy into them or before long you’ll find yourself on the uncool trainer scrap heap along with the rest of the guys wearing Reebok Classics and Nike Air Max!
Not being from the US, I don’t give a cr_p about where NBs come from. Asics runners all the way!
its. not it’s.
I love my two pairs of Asics.
Use capitals at the start of sentences.
not even lying … i bought another pair just this weekend.
don’t forget about sauconys. white hipsters love those too. or are they over them? if so, does that date me?
Holy crap, I own 3 pair. I had no idea that made me white(r). I am fond of the swirly laces though. They don’t come untied.
damn straight i want those kids to know their catcher in the rye
but yearh for real i own two pair. my second the last shoes were nike though
While white people are concerned with issues of authenticity and the proper representation of the ‘old school,’ they realize that their backs and feet would be in agony doing anything more strenuous than ‘being seen’ in Chuck Taylors.
Not that the sort of white people who jog need their backs and feet in a pain-free condition for work, of course.
You forgot to mention that it required of all white people to mention how comfortable their New Balance shoes are every time they come up in conversation. It is white person dogma that New Balances are the most comfortable shoes on earth.
Oh, and I’ve been wearing them since I was 8 and I’ll be wearing them until I die.
i bought those grey 992s because all the white people had them….
i am not white
hahahahah!
So sad…you jumped the shark on this one. New Balance is the only company that makes shoes wide enough for us web-footed folks. Unless white boys are the only ones with wide feet.
Wow, I never knew I was falling behind by not owning a pair of NB’s. But I would imagine that my latest footwear acquisition compensates: Columbia Sportswear sandals. They greatly aid my ability to go outside and make others feel bad about not going out (#9), supplement my shorts (#86) in forcing the delusion that Spring has arrived even though we’re not seeing consistent warm weather yet, and they are manufactured by one of the seminal providers of outdoor performance gear (#87). How’s my whiteness now?
P.S. I totally scored at the bar Friday night – the only white guy getting hammered with a group of Filpinos (#71).
New Balance shoes are safe because they’re lame. Unlike NIKE I’ve never heard of anyone getting shot and killed for their New Balance sneakers.
I’d dodged every single white stereotype until now, (except for being multi-racial). Then this shit hits and I’m looking at my feet in shame.
Oh well, I guess it’s time to throw in the towel. I’m moving to San Francisco, getting an Asian girlfriend and constantly trying to eat more “authentically.”
I have never jogged a day in my life.
Woohoo!! I’m the ‘wrong’ kind of white person!
Can I eat your poop?
New Balance also owns Brine and Warrior Lacrosse companies. So they have a pretty good hold on alot of white activities!
I love the wrong kind of white people.
I love dodging every single white stereotype until now.
i work in Maine and this so unbelieveably true.
New Balance and LL Bean.
(sigh)
I love safe/lame shoes.
I love getting hammered with a group of Filipinos.
I love jumping the shark.
I love those grey 992s because all of the white people have them.
I love wearing them until I die.
I love that New Balances are the most comfortable shoes on earth.
also, is anyone laughing at the ads underneath the post?
“New Balance Shoes
New Balance Shoes – Compare prices & find expert reviews!
http://www.Best-Price.com/New_balance“
Forget New Balance. Asics all the way!
I would never describe a cluster of New Balance shoes as a “rainbow.”
Haha! Great post. I read this at my parents house, and as soon as I got up, I see laying on the floor next to the bathroom, you guessed it, a fresh pair of New Balance shoes!
New Balance are White.
Puma is heeb and jap.
Fila is Italian, but like Tommy Hifigger, it’s been hijacked by the Negro.
How could you overlook Earth Day for this week entry?
I saw so many earnest white people out over the weekend trying to eliminate “non-native” plant species from the trails, all while sucking down bottles of water that will all end up in the landfills….
Clander, clearly holding out on good material for the book while serving us slop….
Who’s going to pay $19.95 for the crappy book anyway?
lol thats the fucking truth
– http://www.anythingblack.net
what took so long
but one last thing to you spelt aasics wrong 😦
– http://www.anythingblack.net
It wasn’t a full sentence, so you lose at life.
its its its its its
My sister owns several pair. And she’s really anal about keeping them clean.
http://bestwhiteparentever.com
I’ve worn my 803’s into the ground, and now proudly wear my new pair of New Balance basketball shoes. Were I any whiter, I’d be see-through
White people like to correct grammar/spelling errors…
Hahahaha happyjack i can’t stop laughing.
I had to think about it long and hard so I’m glad that it was a great comment.
I have a pair of NB basketball shoes that I play racquetball in!
First asshat! Way to go, add that to your list of accomplishments. Learn to string together a few words to make an actual comment instead of sounding like a moron screaming FIRST! English isn’t a had language but if Juan if your real name you probably were raised in a third world country and therefore lack the grammar skills to sound somewhat intelligent. Maybe you can get a some white people to adopt you and they can educate your third world arse.
As for the blog. don’t diss the sweatshops. Kids need to learn the value of a $1.25 work day, the sooner the better.
White people never call it ‘jogging’. It’s always ‘running’.
What was today’s question…?
******************
Global Warming is a Red Herring wrapped in a Canard.
I sport New Balance sneakers to avoid a narrow path.
gotta love NB
http://mantivities.wordpress.com
I always thought the New Balance thing was because, with a few exceptions, we don’t like white shoes. In fact the only white shoes I can think of that are acceptable are chucks, maybe a special Ontisuka tiger and I like keds (but I may be the exception). those adidas shell shoes are so not ok unless you live in the mid-west…I am southern and didn’t even know those existed until college. As an illustration of white shoe hate: I have a friend who recently refused to date a girl and his most often voiced complaint was that she wore white shoes.
Hum, Sergio, I guess since the Italians, Spanish, and Portuguese aren’t Anglo-Saxon then we can’t include “bitching about immigrants” as something that only white people like.
Don’t forget the Steve Job influence!
* Steve Jobs
I thought people only got New Balance because they are cheap?
I just bought a pair of New Balance shoes yesterday.
http://moveitmoveit.wordpress.com
Sometimes this blog is really funny. Sometimes it’s not very funny. This post was not very funny.
Shoes? Whatever next? White people are so stupid!
Btw, come back Christian Slater, all is forgiven.
Your posts suck harder than your mother. Come up with something funny or go on hiatus, motherfucker.
HOW RIGHT YOU ARE- ‘right’er than you know perhaps, I feel guilty and awkward weating New Balance because in some parts of Germany they are the SHOES NEO-NAZIS WEAR, which totally sucks… but they are white people, too… nevertheless, been wearing them since back in the daaaay, hopefully they will not cause em to have to defend my life in the U-Bahn someday.
Going by the number of grammar bloopers you have made (…you can get a some white…Jeez!), you yourself do not seem to be a William Shakespear or Fowler. If Sergio is YOUR real name, you must be a second-hand first world arse yourself. It may be a good idea to wipe it clean before you generalize on third world, unless you want to be labelled a racist swine
I like Nike, but wait a minute, the neighbourhood supports so put some money in it…
http://www.michaelmorgan.co.uk
find out why your gay friends are cooler than you
Stuff Queer People Like
http://stuffqueerpeoplelike.wordpress.com
Earl Butz lives!
I never heard of “Onitsukas” till I read this. Is that supposed to be Japanese, or does it derive from “Go ahead, step onitsuka, and die!”?
Me, I prefer Okabashis. Available at Walgreen’s in the summer. And made in America.
My gay friends are cooler than me because the amyl nitrates dilate their exhaust pipes and let the heat escape faster.
Or is it “amyl nitrites”? I can never keep them straight. (Them, or my friends.)
White people like New Balance more than Chuck’s? Not sure…
Yes, Angry Young Oreo Woman has worn NB but prefers Asics. I pronate!
brilliant!
One way to fix the recurrent problem over ITS vs. IT’S is to read IT’S and, each time you read it, say in your head “IT’S equals IT IS.” Remember that: IT’S always equals IT IS. Then ask in your head, “Does IT IS fit in this particular sentence?” If it doesn’t, then take the apostrophe out. Good luck!
I think Catcher in the Rye needs its own post.
at first this blog was funny, but as posts go on they are less clever.
What’s wrong with deciding not to buy nike after learning about how they put children to work in sweatshops? Good for those people for at least trying to be more responsible in what they spend money on
calling white people of priviledge out on their sometimes contrived and socially relative tastes in fashion, music, culture etc. is a good thing, but this post just seems like it’s scraping the bottom of the barrel for ideas.
that being said i used to own a pair of NB’s for jogging and am super white!
Yeah, the writer(s) of this thing are showing their stripes more and more as time goes on. Initially I thought that maybe they were “white” people themselves who were just doing some gentle poking at themselves, but now it looks like they’re just cynical conservative assholes who think any personal decision that might help this planet is somehow “idealistic” and fodder for jokes.
Look at this week’s post. Wow, people might choose a shoe because it’s made in the USA and they don’t want to oppress foreigners. What a surprise. What do you think, non-white people choose a shoe randomly with dice?
Yeesh. This stuff smacks of some guy who thought that movie “PCU” was cool because it made fun of vegetarians.
JESUS WAS A BLACK MAN LYNCHED ITALIAN STYLE
Very good new post. I own 3 pairs of new balance! I never really thought of them as white, but now that I think about all my white friends who own them, it makes perfect sense. I would love to see more posts like this, but lately you only have 1 blog a week. I really hope you have more posts this week.
Quite true. White people do like to be authentic, but Rockie Bee is right. White people care more about their health then being authentic, and that says alot because being authentic is incredibly important.
Omg, white people are becoming the Greeks, eventually we will worry about stuff that is so unimportant that a less advanced army will be able to overtake us with ease. sad, so sad.
OMG I was just going to talk about Sauconys!!!!! damn you, damn you back to Wal-Mart!!!!!! I love Sauconys along with New Balance.
They also come in varying widths. This is a big perk for us white folk with exceedingly narrow feet.
As a trend watcher this has completley passed me by well maybe it is because I reside in England. But I have seen a trend towards early 1980s version of trainers and New Balance was still a player then, Does anyone remember Pony and Diadora?
It is good to see that people are seeing some of the bigger names a complete rip-off becase they really are.
http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com
Dont forget to mention MARATHONS..they love that shit
Never saw a heeb with pumas, and I live in LA so I see plenty, but japs yes totally, and middle eastern hipsters love puma. Black people wear ralph lauren, they have grown up from TH, they like polo, and have for sometime.
true, white people say running, not “jogging”. “Jogging” makes it look like white people dont try, running makes it more difficult, and we like things difficult.
Thats one reason we like them, because we like to tell people about how little we spent for things such as shoes, authentic vintage shirts, etc. Although we pay 9k for an awesome mid-century chair, “and its a steal because at auction, I know I can get at least 12k for it”.
Linton Johnson, a black player for the Phoenix Suns (NBA), plays basketball in New Balance shoes.
I thought us white people were using the New Balance shoes to play mah jong! Don’t people normally sweat when they jog?
Dr. Murray Trillionaire
http://blog.murraytrillionaire.com
New Balance are so white! Multigenerational, about the only shoes you can wear that your grandmother can wear as well.
The real reason white people like them is that they fit most feet – one of the few lines of sneakers (excuse me, running shoes) that come in narrows and wides as well as medium width, and in hard to fit women’s sizes. The lasts are good.
And they’re pretty well made. In recent years, with large quantities of shoes of all kinds imported from Asia and South America, at rock bottom prices, the quality of fit in most shoes has deteriorated — Rockports being a depressing example — so if you don’t have an absolutely average foot, your choices are usually limited to expensive shoes or a bad fit.
New Balance are a happy exception. I’ve been wearing them forever.
Funny blog. Firstly, I think people should stop bothering him about his typos. They are not that bad and I think when we all (North Americans especially) can speak perfect English (aka. Many people say none of them are…) then we can judge. It’s supposed to be a funny blog, not a homework assignment.
Lastly, I think a future topic should be:
Referring to every African country as Africa.
http://andallotherthings.wordpress.com/2008/04/18/this-just-in-issue-1/
Funny blog. Firstly, I think people should stop bothering him about his typos. They are not that bad and I think when we all (North Americans especially) can speak perfect English (aka. Many people say none of them are…) then we can judge. It’s supposed to be a funny blog, not a homework assignment.
Lastly, I think a future topic should be:
Referring to every African country as Africa.
http://andallotherthings.wordpress.com/2008/04/18/this-just-in-issue-1/
A bounce pass to your white buddy who goes in for a layup – this is the epitome of whiteness on the court.
Asics are great for running. New Balance give me shin splints.
Just bought a my 4th pair of NB on the weekend. No point in fighting it – I’m irretrievably white. Luckily I have an Asian girlfriend to give me flava.
Saying you are training for a marathon is indeed vital to a white person’s “street cred.” Actually running in one – and finishing it – satisfies a white person’s smugness quotient for a whole year.
If child slave labor was good enough for those filthy tomahawk chucking Native Americans I think it’s good enough for the Asians. 🙂
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/01/20/11-asian-girls/
No, G-Man, that girl’s just digging you a deeper hole of whiteness.
Clander hit the nail on the head with this one. Since I found out that New Balance shoes were made in the U.S. of A. I buy nothing else. I’m a retired soldier. Military strength is a result of a strong economy (and not vice-versa).
By one estimate the unfunded liability for just social security and medicare is 83-trillion dollars(!) (No, I can’t reference my source for that number off the top of my head; read it in an article by Scott Burns–who was quoting someone else–who’s opinion I respect). And that’s not including the national debt. Even if the figure were to be just half that we’re still screwed six ways from Sunday. To use the musicle-chairs analogy eventually the music is going to stop and not everyone is going to get to sit down.
Am I saying that we should be willing to pay $20 for a straw broom made in America when we could buy a comparable product for $5 made in Mexico? No I am not. But when products are comparable in price & quality I buy American.
There are hidden costs to not buying American. When unemployment goes up so does divorce, domestic violence and substance abuse, for example, with the attendant costs in the criminal justice system. Food for thought.
From 1976 to 1994 I ran an average of fifteen miles a week and developed osteoarthritis in my right knee. When I finally saw an orthopedic doctor he said “When the running craze started in the seventies I just shook my head and thought to myself ‘these people don’t know what they’re doing to themselves.'” Now I wish that I’d never ran a single mile. I’m still a fitness-buff but for my aerobic workout I use the eliptical cross-trainer at the gym.
Numerous people have commented on errors in grammar & spelling. I don’t think of myself as lazy but I do wish that we could do spell-check here and edit our comments later as needed. Btw, the contraction of “you are” is “you’re” and not “your.” A great many people don’t seem to know this and I don’t understand why.
I’m not happy: it’s Monday; I’m at work; my fiancee says that she needs some space; my 18-year-old is the ultimate slacker and is unimpressed with stories about his dad going through boot-camp at 17; I didn’t win the lottery this past weekend (again). “Life sucks and then you die.”
You wanted to know all this, right? 🙂 –Jeff in Houston, Texas
lmao!!! he said that in mixed company? outstanding.
lol
White people also love mentioning that they are “doing a 5K” this weekend. (Presumably in their New Balance shoes).
I play basketball in New Balances all time, lay up king!
LOL
DO NOT WANT You
I hate you tucc!
http://stuffgodhates.wordpress.com/
Great post clander.
citing your sources in a post is so white! lol
White people like craft fairs and hipster crafting
http://craftknife.blogspot.com/
Ditto on the shin splints..
I actually wear New Balance because I can get size 14EEE shoes for my grotesquely huge feet without special ordering them.
To quote a bad movie, “Why run when not chased?”
And Triathlons! its a safe bet that if not marathon it could be a triathlon. Does it make me a bad white person if I dont own a pair of NB or run?
ROFLMAO!! I am white. I own Uggs, Crocs, Birks and even a pair of Earth Shoes. My particular favourite are Keens though.
For the record, I do not own any New Balance. Yet. I didn’t know they were the sweatshop-free brand. Thanks for letting me know!!! LOL
Did no one else think that, in addition to having more mistakes than usual, this post was written in a different style? maybe the dude is busy now that he’s writing his book, so he hired somebody and gave them a topic……..
I own 3 freaking pair of these white guy shoes, but mainly because they come in wide widths and fit my feet better than other shoes. Of course I use them for the white “sport” of running. wp love running to nowhere.
Stuff White Foam Inside Shoes Likes
-Foamy Boat
NB ok boring!
http://IGotUGGs.com
Poor people like running.
http://www.poorpeoplelikepizza.blogspot.com
just want to say that I think the concept that New Balance is made in the USA is a misnomer. I went to buy some last year, and they were all made in China. In fact, all the shoes in that damn store were made in China. I felt like an asshole, but I ended up buying the New Balance anyway just because people BELIEVE they’re made in the USA. I felt like I was voting for a democrat who supports the war, just so I can have my state turn blue. lame. sorry china.
Yeah, to go with my NBs I also have a pair of Birks and just got Keens a couple months ago. My old dress shoes were from LL Bean. I have a very white shoe collection.
Ultimate white dad uniform….. white new balances, with calf high white socks, dockers shorts and a tucked in polo shirt. Classic!
Definately gotta have at least one small piece of duck tap on them some where.
Every single rower in the women’s varsity 8 on my college crew team rocked the exact same pair of 801’s…
Because of the widths is also particularly popular with older, white people whose feet hurt.
. . . and for us duck-footed white folk with quadruple-E wide feet as well.
Uh, I guess I’m a legend, because I play basketball in New Balances. The same ones I run in. And I run marathons. I’m ultra white.
I don’t own New Balance, either. And I certainly don’t run.
My husband owns New Balance and he runs.
My kids have several pairs of the crocs – so adorable on little baby feet…
So does this give proper credit to the race even though I, myself, do not own or wear either of these favored shoes?
http://www.momstop.blogspot.com
Awesome, I never could figure out why everyone has New Balances and now I know.
The tone seems different in this post. Generally there’s a dry sort of anthropological distance to the posts. But this one just seems rather cynical and outwardly sarcastic.
This white man swears by two things:
(1)
his NB 992 10.5 2E’s
and
(2)
http://www.theweeklywad.com
Tons of people will pay for the book.
I will likely be required to purchase said book for my dear husband because he loves this stuff so much.
http://www.momstop.blogspot.com
I am also first to be stupid
I, too, love Asics for running. That being said, I’m still a casual New Balance kinda gal.
Actually, white people go “out for a run.” They don’t go running…
http://www.momstop.blogspot.com
Am I still allowed here?
I also swear by adult diapers.
My husband is a flat-footed white guy and NB is all he can wear.
http://wendytatum.com
Yes, New Balance are worn by the white. However, Asics are a better shoe especially for those whites that pronate.
no
OK, so while the title of these posts are humorous and “hey did you ever notice” style musings, I dont think I have ever once laughed at the actual explanation. Someone please refresh for those of us who understand humor why SWPL is so darn funny?
As a white person, I own New Balance running shoes for all the reasons stated above.
I am not, however, training for a marathon. Those are for weenie whites. Real white people train for Triathlons.
I can’t wait to show this article to my black friend.
and Bill Clinton.
Damn…and here I was being all satisfied that after wearing NB for 20+ years it was just a good shoe.
Not made in a sweatshop? Hrm. Won’t go well with my endangered sea turtle skin boots…must change brands ASAP!
Thanks SWPL! 😀
… and that’s the only time the possessive rule doesn’t count!
God it took me ages to figure that one out.
If you read Portuguese and want to see stuff white Brazilian women (at least this one) like, check it out here: http://www.escrevalolaescreva.blogspot.com
This blog is getting great reviews:
http://www.jtcinc.blogspot.com
You mean I’m banned.
Please let me stay and play. Pleeeeeeease.
http://bananart.wordpress.com/
Adidas for life.
My husband also has performance problems.
But even if you don’t read Portuguese, you will be able to see many pictures of naked white Brazillian women here, including me.
My imaginary black friend of course.
I really don’t know what pronate means however. But I do know I like monkeys.
I wore the same pair of NB for 20 years and they smelled like ass.
None of the posts are funny actually. It’s just that the people visiting this blog have no life (including me of course).
Great post as usual. I own two pairs of New Balance myself… never got into Uggs or Crocs though.
http://green4u.wordpress.com
You got me on this one. My father was the original jogger in the early seventies, and we used to drive to Boston to buy New Balance. Starting with a pair of orange suede New Balance I bought in 1998, I have worn nothing else since. In addition to the style I wear for very occasional jogging which I replace every three years or so, I buy a new pair of retro-ish New Balance every couple of years which I first wear for going out, then work, then bicycling around town, and eventually for gardening and doing stuff with my kids. They are in pretty bad shape before they fall out of the rotation all together.
I play basketball very rarely. When I do, given that I lived abroad and like the idea of soccer, I never even take layups. White people who like the idea of soccer never shoot in basketball.
I actually don’t care about the sweatshop thing, but was turned off from my previous favorite, Nike Pegasus, by some bad designs in the early 90s.
Jesus was Jewish. Now I’m not positive, but I don’t think that qualifies him as black.
ahem, you must mean squash. 😉
Hilarious!
Everyone I know owns at least 2-3 pair of New Balance.
Although, now that NB’s have become trendy, Saucony’s are what the white people are wearing now, and unfort. soon will become the trend.
Child labor to make Nikes? Don’t care. I wear New Balance because they fit. Just try to find Nikes in a wide size.
Ever so true. Only the best.
http://www.platenuts.com
LOL! Sergio, take it easy.
Who doesn’t love shoes?
http://www.asusportsreport.com/
You’re always welcome here, tornados old pal!
wp love wide sizes.
wp love owning at least 2-3 pair of New Balance
Especially in their asses.
wp love original joggers.
Shoes, sneakers, who cares? I find a good comfortable walking shoe worth its weight in gold.
wp love white Brazilian women. Iy love naked white Brazillian women.
wp love endangered sea turtle skin boots
It’s also hard for me to find pants in the wide size that I require.
wp love owning New Balance running shoes for all of the reasons stated above.
That’s because it has to match the huge amount of gold I wear around my neck.
wp love never once laughing at the actual explanation.
wp love pronating.
I have to strongly disagree! Ugg boots haven’t been “disowned” by Whites. http://www.IgotUggs.com is a perfect example.
Ibrahim
http://www.stuffwhitepeopleliketshirts.com/
wp love flat-footed white guys.
Wow, his father started the jogging movememnt in the 70s? Amazing.
wp love weekly wads.
wp love cynicism and outward sarcasm.
If I wrote this same blog about black peoples’ taste in shoes I’d be kicked off the entire internet and Don Imus would be pounding on my door for an interview.
wp love never figuring out why everyone has New Balances.
Yes, I own New Balance Fred Containers but in the last year my love of Apple products with my training for a series of (half) marathons I started wearing Nike Fred Contrainers due to the whole Nike + thing.
So when I run from the farmers market along the water to the Marina I currently have Nikes.
wp love legends.
Thank you happyjack. You are the only friend I have. I mean it. really. I have no other friends.
wp love older, white people whose feet hurt.
wp love every single rower in the women’s varsity 8 on your college crew team.
wp love duck tap (?)
I really need to get out in the sun more often.
Jesus was more of Arabic (the old school Jewish look) so he was darker. He probably was similar in looks to Bin Laden. So he was neither “black” nor “white” I’m also pretty sure he wasn’t lynched. I remember seeing a movie or something where he was crucified.
wp think only golden eel wears white new balances with calf high white socks, dockers shorts and a tucked in polo shirt.
wp think golden eel is a tool.
wp love misnomers.
wp love poor people who like running.
Another good site I like is http://www.igotjuggs.com
Ibrahim
wp hate uggs.
wp hate foamy boats.
wp love busy dudes.
So what’s stopping you.
Personally, I would love to get kicked off the entire internet. Maybe then I could get a life.
wp love grotesquely huge feet.
That’s right, get those 3rd World kids OUT of the factory and back on the streets prostituting themselves where they belong. Then we lib’ruls can all feel much better about ourselves.
wp love sweatshop-free brands.
wp love LOLing.
clatterboot likes eating poop.
Beautiful stuff, and I’m an Asics man.
“It is considered a legendary white male move to play basketball in a pair of New Balance. Lots of layups.”
Oh yes. The pass sets up the layup.
You really need to meet some new people then.
wp love laying up kings.
Motley Queue wishes he could do a 5k this weekend.
wp love homework assignments.
wp love funny blogs.
This blog is not an example.
Your a black man about to be lynched.
wp love happy exceptions.
And also in my ass.
My hand smells like my butt.
Me neither!
wp love getting kicked off the entire internet.
wp love Mr. T.
wp love beautiful stuff.
Me too.
LOL!
wp love trillionaires.
wp love black players for the Phoenix Suns (NBA).
wp love bad white person(s).
Hey, you all. Do what I do and be a humanitarian and send all of your old tennis shoes back to the sweat shops so the workers can have something to ware on their feet instead of those palm frown sandals. This makes white people feel good inside.
wp love actually running – and finishing – a marathon. Shawn is very jealous of this.
wp love seeing some of the bigger names as complete rip-offs becase they really are.
wp love feeling much better about themselves.
wp love feeling good inside.
wp love other good sites they like.
I always love when someone criticizes another person’s intelligence online – Sergio, your grammar leaves a lot to be desired … things to consider
1) “English isn’t a had language” – i think you mean “hard”
2) “if Juan if your real name” – the second “if” should be “is”
3) “grammar skills” — this is a subtle point, but please note that because “grammar” is a noun, the correct use here would be “grammatical skills” … thanks for playing though
xoxo,
pwned
Me too!
wp love digging you a deeper hole of whiteness.
wp love taking ages to figure that one out.
wp love thinking Catcher in the Rye needs its own post.
wp love going on hiatus.
You forgot Doc Martens. Those were all the rage back in the day. You couldn’t be cool unless you had a pair of those $100 sandals or the equally overpriced boots. Then, at the height of their popularity, white people decided they sold out and stopped wearing them.
wp love forgiving Christian Slater.
No one does that.
wp love to stop wearing them.
wp love Nike+.
If not NB, then definitely Sauconys. I see those a lot too.
The only reason I buy New Balance is b/c it was the first sneaker that came in widths. Now Nike and Adidas have figured out there is a market for wide shoes and started putting some out but before N.B. you had to buy the nike D width. Maybe black people don’t have wide feet.
I also see a lot of porn but that is for a differnt topic.
I used to wear Docs back in the day. Then I realized that they were retarded and I stopped wearing them.
I also noticed that they stuck something fierce.
What? You want to spread your toe fungus to the third world? That’s not very nice.
Hell no. I was the white Jordan. I wore black Nikes and they made me play like Jordan.
Jesus was a New Balance shoe stiched Singaporian style. You guys seem to have the attention spans of black men lynched Italian style (although the thin crust is nice sometimes too!).
I’ll buy my own pair of NB from no on. 😀
I’ll buy my own pair of NB from now on. 😀
I would rather have really cheap shoes so please keep the kids working in the factories thank you very much.
I never knew I was wearing a socially conscious shoe, I always bought them because they are cheaper than nikes..
That’s because you are a cheap bastard like most white people.
Including me.
I’ll buy my own pair of NB from now on. 🙂
They stunk something fierce is what I meant to say.
http://www.stuffwhitedbagslike.wordpress.com
Shut up already. We got it.
I forgot to mention that this site is a worthless piece of crap but I hope some people will visit it.
Oh, did I say that out loud?
http://www.stuffwhitedbagslike.wordpress.com
What did I miss? Did they take all of the cool kids aside in high school and teach them about cool white stuff? Because I am VERY white – so white that I am not allowed outside in shorts or a bathing suit for fear of blinding someone – but I don’t do/like most of the things posted in this blog. Of course, I was not a cool kid either.
I recently started walking (not running or jogging) because my doctor threatened me with more pills if I didn’t. I went to a shoe shop, had an evaluation, and bought what they thought worked best with my foot/posture. I think the shoes were Brooks or something. It never occurred to me to look for shoes that would help me be more white.
Is there just a race called “bland”? Because I don’t seem to do enough of any of this to be white, black, red, yellow, pink, brown, purple polka-dotted or anything like it. I think my life, my culture, and my freckles would definitely fit as “bland”.
I love hammering Filipinas. Little Brown Sex Machines.
If you want to be really cool, you should take up speed walking.
I love to see speed walkers’ asses go back and forth, especially the competitive speed walkers in the Olympics.
Yeah. With no shoes we would all be running around like the Blackfoot Indians.
IT does seem important for white people to have at least owned a pair of Churck Taylors in college to be seen it… Although they make odd noises and are constructed poorly, any white person worth his witeness needs to have at least owned a pair.
“otherwise they might look foolish when their co-workers are talking about Catcher….”
pure gold!!!
True. But I’m too busy buying expensive sandwiches, watching the Wire and figuring out what’s best for poor people.
There is one other shoe that white people love and has withstood the test of time. Rainbow flip-flops.
http://www.rainbowsandals.com/Default.asp
This footwear meets multiple categories of why they are enjoyed by white people.
1. They are the most freakin’ expensive flip-flop you can buy, and sold only in high-end establishments. You can’t even get them at Target, and white people love me some Target.
2. They are enviro friendly and “made to fit your lifestyle”.
3. They are made in the grand old US of A where they are assembled in a sweatshop of legal aged workers assuring your willingness to pay a premium price.
4. They come with a guarantee. White people love products with a guarantee…see previous posts about Apple products.
5. You can buy them made with hemp. White people love products made with hemp, because if you are too smart to smoke it you can still feel cool by wearing it.
As a side note, I love this blog. And apparently I am very white…very.
“I thought they were right,”
You sit on a throne of lies. You always were annoyed.
I never did.
I think you should have a separate blog for white women who love black men. We’re not typical white people. We should have a catagory all our own. We rebuff “things white people like,” and if there is a such thing as a white lifestyle, we refuse it! We love black men and fully embrace their way of livin!
I am also extremely gay as you can see from my blog. Please come and basque in my gayness.
the funny thing with this blog is that my mexican wife is discovering she’s really white! white isn’t a skin color, it’s a state of mind. ha ha.
The reason I love black men of course is because of their enormous shrlongs.
Of course the real reason she is trying to think she is white is to try and forget about the fact that she is in this country illegally.
Very funny, angry white dude. Stop posin as a white woman. Just because a black guy stole your girlfriend…
You’re right – who wants a little pink earthworm when she could get a big black cobra, baby!
dude, glad to see you’re enjoying my name.
i must say, your impression is much better than our demented alter-ego “happyjack, when gerbils attack”
keep up the good work.
wp love being imitated.
wp love lists.
and side notes.
and overusing the word “apparently”.
Yeah, and the white people who read this blog REALLLLLY like to copyedit the posts of others. What could be more anal retentive (i.e. white) than that?!
i’m pretty sure we have established that you are wkowp.
wp love homoerotic sporting events.
JASON! Yes. Thank you for writing that bit of rational thinking and intelligence.
Finally! Someone gets it. Actually, a lot of you are getting it today – Christian is just a hack who lacks creativity.
wp love big black cobras.
wp men love posing as white women.
wkowp love being cheap bastards.
wp love overspending for name-brands and claiming that in the long run you actually save money by spending $60 for a ralph lauren polo ’cause it will last longer than the $15 cherokee polo.
God I hope not since I’m still married. Maybe my wife is cheating on me with a black man.
That’s true.
1. I love making lists.
2. I use the word apparantly a lot.
yup- you got me. just bought a pair yesterday on sale at kohl’s. can’t get much whiter than that!
You, my dear, must be an arsehole. Your blog is about what? Things that “poor” people like?
Oh, dahling, fantastic. Aren’t you so lucky you’re not PPPOooR? How genius you must be, and how great you must feel when gazing into the mirror at your grotesqueness since you came up with this “idea” for a blog!!
Wonderful!
dude. my sperry topsiders have been condemned by fema.
wp love wearing shoes without socks to affect a casual lifestyle.
I missed the definition of wkowp. What does that mean?
LMAO!
Also, I’m not angry. Just bored.
Nora M. is a black guy trying to validate his lack of intelligence and dysfunctional ghetto culture, even though medical evidence (Kinsey and Masters and Johnson) prove there is little to no difference between white and black men’s penises.
…and anthropological distances.
bestest!differences!EVER!
I have the original 801’s. Everytime I see somebody with New Balances that aren’t 801’s i share this little tidbit
“Ohh you have the 803’s huh. Ya i heard they are a good shoe but they aren’t as good as the 801’s that i have on”
Jealousy erupts…
wrong kind of white people
distances!
DOH!
I have to start reading this blog more often. I am, apparently, the lamest white person I know because I don’t fall in with any of the stereotypes proclaimed to be of my [kinds] liking!
I do, however, LIKE things. And I thought it was pretty normal for all people to do/buy/be around/consort with/ have/etc. things they like as opposed to things they don’t?
GAW! I guess I really am lame…. now I’ve confused myself. Stupid white person!
wp love being deluded enough to assume they’re entitled to a separate blog entry.
I hate you Christian, for all of the white -er-right reasons. You are pathetic.
everytime someone corrects someones grammar or spelling on the internet, it feels like 9/11 all over again
see “apparently” comment above.
Part of the reason you are so lame is due to the fact that you are visiting this blog. Not visiting will help in reducing your lame factor.
I don’t know what the hell I just said.
I am the exception however due to my extremely small penis.
Thank you. Sometimes I am the right kind and sometimes I am the wrong kind.
HEY!
I’ve got a pair of New Balance shoes. In fact I’m wearing them right now. I couldn’t have told you what they were until I saw the ‘N’ in your picture. They’re comfortable and they have taken a lot of wear.
YOU GOT A PROBLEM WID DAT?
[b]LOL[/b]
um
bounce passes are the whitest kinds of assists, especially two-handed ones. none of that fancy no-look, one-handed hotdoggin you see from jerks like marbury (the least white player in the league now that van exel is retired).
wp like saying wid dat.
And he was crucified by Romans, so I’m not sure why Jews get the blame. Shouldn’t we all hate Italians?
I meant to say shlongs (black Cobras).
White people really like “Talk Sex with Sue Johanson” cause this lady is hilarious!
http://theplasticspoon.blogs.com
HAHA. Yeah, I own 4 pairs of New Balance shoes. I have my grey ones on today that look disturbingly similar to the picture here. 🙂
My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
I’ll skip the NB’s and go straight to Salomon XA Pro trail runners, please…!
wp love speaking the truth.
(sometimes)
(but in this case, it is the truth)
whats wrong with deciding not to buy nike after learning about how they put children to work in sweatshops is white people always thinking the way to be ethical is to just shop more ethically. this has been covered before, i dont remember which post.
also, he is obviously not going to waste all his good ideas here when he can put them in his book.
wp love thinking they could maybe get a life.
wp love larry bird.
No, no, no. The reason non-running white people started wearing NB is because it was a way of saying that you are not falling for Nike’s attempt to convince poor black kids to pay $140 for a pair of Nike Airs because their favorite NBA star wore them. Remember all the poor-stupid-black-kids-from-the-ghetto-being-easily-manipulated-by-big-evil-Nike stories? It was about that time that NB became big with non-runners?
wp love feeling like an asshole and having their state turn blue.
^wkowp
wp love paying full price for their NBs and the locally-owned boutique running store.
or rei.
wp hate your f@cking guts!
hilarious!! 🙂
best comeback on this blog yet!!
nike+apple=wporgasm
it isn’t as cool to steal New Balances
wp love appearing more hardcore than you.
Thank you. Something tells me “happy-gerbil boy-jack” was actually tornados28 in disguise.
wp love disguises.
4) “…the grammar skills to sound somewhat intelligent.” – Intelligent describes how to sound, therefore it should be “the grammatical skills to sound somewhat intelligently.” Sounds weird I know, but it is correct.
double pwned.
Don’t own New Balance shoes, white people in the news… always boring articles, can’t afford health care at this point, couldn’t tell you anything about rugby, and don’t like music piracy because I am an audio engineer. Damn, I must be rebelling against my whiteness.
Remember all the poor-stupid-black-kids-from-the-ghetto-being-easily-manipulated-by-big-evil-Nike stories?
Nike has done more to get blacks to thin out their own than any white separatist group. My shoes on to Nike! 🙂
Shut up.
It would be nice if every black were imaginary.
Black players look like they were burnt by the Phoenix sun.
WP call it “playing the game the right way.”
New Balance because in some parts of Germany they are the SHOES NEO-NAZIS WEAR
So that’s what the N really stands for…
Oh, and ALL of the San Antonio Spurs from David Robinson on are honorary White Persons.
I have a friend who recently refused to date a girl and his most often voiced complaint was that she wore white shoes.
Was this a black girl with a white hat? A walking Oreo.
Can we please lay off the tards? I never expect anyone to use proper english or to spell well online. That being said, if a tard wants to flap his misshapen lips and rant a little bit, let the tard be. Trying to correct a tard’s language is like to trying to spit at the moon: It’ll never work and you might get sputum on your face.
As far as shoes are concerned, I think two white people favorites have been ignored: Vans and Docs. Us white folk loves us some Vans and Docs. I wear em till there wore completely out. But, I don’t think I have ever owned a pair of new balance in my whole life; I don’t think I even know anyone who has new balance shoes. Oh well, I don’t have a gay friend either, maybe it’s a genetic defect. I’ll live.
I used to work at REI.
I do like putting gerbils in my pants however.
Good point.
I CAN’T FIGURE OUT IF YOU ARE A RACIST OR AND IDIOT BUT IT SURE WOULD SUCK TO BE YOU.
I hate trail runners.
I run over them with my mountain bike.
I hate Boston.
I use NB/Salomon/Cidi on my bicycle, My father is Italian and my mother is from Maine. I was born and raise in Venezuela.
I’m a US Citizen and people in the street send to my country 3 or 4 times a week. I tell them , I’m waiting for my Social Security, them, I will go back…most of these racist are NOT WHITE. Don’t understand why people still taking time for these stupid things. Look out for criminals/drugs dealers/rapists/serial killers, why bother lose their shiny time with me. I’m not leaving the US until I get old, and the medical system won’t work for my anymore.
PS. I Learn English, sadly, after I was 27 year old. But I can Speak it. Can you speak any other language? Don’t judge !
I hate Sue Johanson.
I hate talking sex.
I love watching porn.
hmmm…maybe you’re not wkowp. unless you were like 32 and still working there.
good wp only shop at rei. retail is a career for wkowp.
Who are you talking to?
Do you mean Sidi?
WP LOVE CAPS LOCK!!!
I hope you don’t speak english as bad as you write it because I can’t understand what the hell you are saying.
It’s my right as an American to judge.
jamison = wkowp
Yes.
I think keeping some little nugget in your head about the blogging habits of an entire race (or any habits for that matter) is pretty anal. No, being anal isn’t just a white thing. In fact, since we’re being anal about analness, um, your comment has anal written all over it–are we white? Come on now, just admit it: You’re white and would like to be, shall we say, other.
It’s OK to be white. I’m white and I’m darned proud of it. So be proud and go get yourself some mac and cheese with a hot dog and an ice cold Fresca.
I’m going to watch MASH and have a grilled cheese with baked Lays on the side and a 20 ounce diet Coke. Then I am going to write my congressman about the horrors of global climate change (have you seen what’s going on in Greenland, it’s a nightmare).
Dammit!
Those NB things are all over the place here!
– I guess I must be a white person then.
(they are really good shoes, btw)
Yes, to Sidi or yes to that you don’t speak english very well?
wp love their rights as an american, especially when it allows them to judge.
Well, I guess I speak a little better that I write, but I only use it to basic communication with my relatives, because I live in my multicultural city and soon moving to Puerto Rico. So, now that you said that, I may take an English curse over the summer and star using it in these kind of high level meetings.
psst. your wkowp is showing.
Somehow I don’t think the sight of my ass going back and forth during speed walking is going to make me a cool kid either. Just a guess.
Yes to both. Sorry SIDI and yes I don’t write or speak very well…
wp love to use the “reply to this comment” link for communications with other wp on this blog.
so is wkowp a cousin of “bland”? They seem to be related.
Cool. I love Sidi. Used them for many years on my mountain bike.
And I also think it is good that you can speak and write more then one language. Although if people don’t that is fine too.
I agree happyjack.
So how’s it going today? Weather good where you are? Nice and sunny here in LA.
I’m an expert judger.
Is judger a word?
How can you hate a people who gave us pizza? The other gave us unleavened bread. That alone is reason enough to hate them.
GOOD.
That is the funniest thing I have read all day on this blog! I think you might have meant “bask”. But if you want us to “basque”, we can certainly try (although it is not a verb, so we might have to be inventive).
My father is Italian and my mother is from Maine.
Maine: The new ethnicity.
wkowp is the illegimate first cousin of white trash.
Wow!!!
My friend gave me a ugly pair a while back. No wonder why
I never wore them!!!!!
Even better if they’re vintage!
And I love Matlock! And gerbils!
Me too!
it’s raining like a mofo in our nation’s capital.
dude, i have bought only new balance for the past twenty years, and am never prouder than when my son is wearing a pair.
but i like them bc they come in wides. WIDES, dude!
It’s going just swimmingly, old chum! I’m about to take myself a nice little latte and scone break! Can you say “YUMMY?”
Dude!
now you’re just being silly fake-happyjack (the original)
white women who love black men. We’re not typical white people.
You would have made good bait for the Trans-Atlantic slave merchants. Put a white woman out in the African jungle and the next minute you have a whole tribe of monkeys sailing “coach” for America. 😀
happyjack (the original) = rkowp
dude, it sounds weird when a women says dude.
Jane, I assume you are a women?
Vintage means used.
You’re the original fake-happyjack, huh? Thanks for starting all of the confusion.
I gues you’re not white then.
😦
dude. make sure you get vanilla soy latte. that’s they only kind i drink.
Me too. How strange…
I think that goes without being said.
you are clearly the fake-original fake-happyjack (the original).
wp don’t like being confused!
This is the weakest post so far. Nike’s are more expensive, cheaper quality, and uses slave labor. I don’t see any reason anyone who isn’t a slave to marketers would buy an inferior shoe for a more expensive price, made in China.
why else would i be so happy?
am i right fake-original fake-happyjack (the original)?
happyjacks love homosexual sporting events.
you’re darned tootin, fake-happyjack (the original)!
Additionally, had this story been about Rainbow flip-flops which as a white person I do own, I would have laughed because it was true. But my New Balances don’t define my whiteness. My Rainbows, however, do.
Wait… what?
100%!
😉
You’re right English is not a “had” language, but if Juan “if” your real name you might have been raised in a third world country.
Sergio…I agree with you that leaving a “first” post is a bit ridiculous, however, the rest of your post is not only grammatically incorrect; it is also hideously inane.
Apparently, grammar does not exist in third world countries so they are incapable of creating words or sentences and they communicate through telepathic images. Indeed all of the other languages in the world; make no sense because they are not written in English.
Sergio, Sergio- would, that you could have found your own set of well to do, philanthropic, white people. Perhaps then, you could write a scathing reply about the idiocy of posting “first” as a comment, that was not only logical and without typos, but also with punctuation and perhaps even lacking your haphazard butchering of the grammatical system.
Like slaves.
Thank you.
yes it is. i figured in your bizzaro fake-happyjack world, that you would totally be a mocha whole milk latte kinda guy.
And like my corn hole.
no. I am all man.
Gah, heavens no! Who needs those empty calories? Not me!
😉
WTF is jumping the shark?
I feel your pain, Mike. More than you will ever know.
It would even more nice if I was imaginary, though.
I suck!
wp love transgender misidentification.
Thank you.
So… what are you doing on Friday? Do you like salsa dancing?
wp love empty calories!
I own a pair of New Balance shoes. You know, I liked my Nikes better.
http://www.jonesview.wordpress.com
Not this wp!
😉
I love this blog!
http://www.jonesview.wordpress.com
wp love knowing what their pseudonyms are going to say.
I love men. Thank you.
yeah…actually i meant to say:
wkowp like empty calories.
(premature e-postulation)
If O.J. Simpson had worn New Balance the coppers would never have considered him a suspect. He beat his wife and the murder rap but might have saved himself in civil judgments as well.
Now you do.
Apology accepted.
Thank YOU.’
wp love it when if you don’t, it’s fine too.
hmmm…i suspect there is a fake-fake-original fake-happyjack (the original) in our midst!
You didn’t have to mention it Jones. We could just tell how meaningless your life was by your post.
wp love decrying.
wp love going about their business.
corn hole = wkowp
wp don’t love it that much, though.
That makes my brain hurt.
I know a guy named Sally.
wp love leaving the office.
until tomorrow fellow wp, i bid you adieu!
(wp love using foreign phases to say ‘goodbye’.)
couldn’t have said it better myself!
I know why they use it Germany
Because N means Nazi and stupid German wanna be nazis think that way too.
I like N just because of the comfort.
Btw I wrote about this blog if u didn’t know… white people like it too
see
http://www.livecrunch.com
Neither could I!
Have a good evening, happyjack (the original). Until we meet again, I remain…
happyjack (the original)
Were I any whiter, I’d be see-through
Or as Shaggy would say a g-g-g-g-g-g ghost!
I don’t believe you.
what bunch of idoits. can you please watch the history channel.
Nora M., the fake, gives it away by dropping the g from the end of “living” and misspelling “shlong”, thus proving she is actually a pathetic black male, probably unemployable and drug addicted, with a criminal record and a HIV infection.
that jane is a fraud!
and i am a girl!
well, an old biddy to be precise, but it turns out you always FEEL like a girl.
just to clarify.
i am a girl.
the jane who claims to be a man, is a liar.
and i say dude.
and i am too old to say dude, even if i were a dude.
what, girls cant say fun words?
should i say gentleman, instead?
or kind sir?
personally jane, the only girl i ever knew who emphatically used “dude”, and a lot, was one of those wp who smoked way too much pot, to the point of actually enjoying Widespread Panic concerts. (I defy you to achieve this feat whilst sober.)
“kind sir” always wins brownie points, however.
wp love using archaic possessives like “whilst”.
happyjack, you are the best. You make me happy
booooooooooooooooooooooooo
That’s why we elected George Bush.
lmao
i’ve only recently come to own NBs but I only wear them trail running which as a white city dweller, could be seen as a white person escaping their whiteness I suppose.
trail running is the whitest type of running you can do because it’s tougher and you generally have to travel to even do it. So one-upping …
It’s a white person’s sport.
are you serious? Maybe you should read some books. Romans performed the killing but it was at the behest of the Jewish religious leaders at the time, Jesus was horning in on their money! No joke. Read a book.
I dont think its a misnomer. And i hate apostrophes but love starting sentences with and.
wp love misusing the word “possessives” where the word “conjunctions” is required, because it sounds more neurotic.
wp also love editing their own blog comment posts, as if their carefully constructed Internet Personality would otherwise explode and all the Internet People could see them for the couch-dwelling, soda-swilling, Doritos eaters they really are.
finally, wp love self-obsession.
WTF are you talking about?
New Balance shoes? I guess that’s pretty white, but is it the kind of “white” this blog normally refers to? I would have thought Converse would be more fitting.
I love how the blog is trying to make fun of the fact that white people are against terrible conditions in sweatshops. Shame on white people!
Funny!
awesome post- and even more awesome blog. I read your posts all the time and find myself laughing at how incredibly accurate they are (as I sit here in San Francisco wearing my Patagonia Vest), and how cleverly written they are.
Keep up the great work, and congratulations on your book deal!!
cg
This is funny, i just switched to New Balance recently, i was wearing Asic’s before. Also i was one of the jerks that couldnt stop talking about the “GEL Kayano”s. Im going to try out Brooks next, they give back to the community, i heard their shoes are made by elderly homeless retired porn fluffers.
Does the kind of Stuff White People Like include things like
Justice, Truth, and Equality?
http://www.survival-international.org
BigUp! New Balance! U Done Know!
Yup. I’ve got 2 pair…
Don’t forget Chacos…
We don’t like them so much since they’ve drastically cut back their pro deal program and are moving their manufacturing from Paonia, CO to Viet Nam.
There’s another – white people love pro deals…
Keep it up – great idea – the haters are jealous.
I had no idea NB was something white people like. I wore it at some point in my life though.
I’ll be damned. I just came over from my blog site because someone posted a review of this site.
My first thought was; “Nah, she’s just pulling our leg”. “Why would someone even WANT to go there”?
To my surprise (on a few levels), here you guys are. Actually discussing what White’s like. The fact that I ended the previous sentence with no comma and none of the thousand and one things I COULD have said, is a tribute to my really trying to understand what’s going on here.
Oh! I’m a Black American male, college educated, never been arrested, or carried a gun, or robbed anyone, I live with my wife and 2 kids ( both in college) and I own my home.
I know that’s unbelievable to many who read this page, but guess what? I have 6-7 friends (Black) with an almost carbon copy existence to mine!!!!
Shock and awe, huh? Anyway, I did not see all the racial rants I was expecting to find, nor the usual unfunny put- downs one normally finds on these type of sites.
Sadly though, this page does exhibit a large dose of moral superiority over people who wear, say, Nike’s. But I’m glad that’s all I found on my brief perusal of your pages.
I’ll leave you to yourselves, once again. But remember, WE are watching you. Incidentally, I’d welcome any replies and if you send them to the posted e-mail address you see here, I’d be glad to help demystify or, maybe, confirm any of your serious inquiries about the other side of the spectrum. In unity and science, maintain. Musicseawater
Ha ha, spot on! I have two pairs and my friends wear them as well. Also, I think we like them b/c they are not garish looking, like Nikes. btw, there’s a NB Factory in Boston. Rockin, I tell you.
Well he was Reagan’s VP.
Hey Sam! It never fails. there’s always at least one coward who can take his fathers penis out of his mouth to say something totally ignorant and inappropiate.
Your k-9, dog-ass, bow-wow, whore of a mother, should have stayed off the corner long enough to teach you some manners.
My bet is that you typed that foul word with one hand in your pants, getting such a thrill…..
What a loser! LOOOOO_SSSSSEEEERRRR! and a jerk, too!
hey christian lander are you going to coachella?
oh yeah and also this is one of the truest ones yet… one of the ones where I just clicked to the page and saw the picture and started laughing. awesome.
I say dude constantly. but, then again… pot. so you win, nevermind.
“Jumping the shark” is a reference to an episode of Happy Days in which the Fonz jumped a penned-in shark via a set of water skis. It is used to describe episodic ideas which, in an effort to match previous success (such as the episode(s) where the Fonz jumped things with his motorcycle), have progressed beyond the realm of believability and thereby made obvious their desperate ploy to garner attention.
Sincerely,
A white law student
totally awesome!
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
If I had to take a shit in the woods and didn’t have toilet paper, I would take off my theoretical Crocs and use those as toilet paper. In fact, I would then probably wish that instead of toilet paper we could all use Crocs to wipe our asses, because that’s really all they’re good for.
Crocs make me want to vomit. They’re the ugliest invention on earth.
I do own a pair of New Balance shoes, however, I like them because I have very wide feet for a girl, and New Balances accommodate the boats at the bottom of my legs very nicely.
Sadly, you’ve nailed it again.
That being said, OMG NBs are comfortable shoes.
http://athenasmom.wordpress.com/
Not just college. It’s a white person thing to wear chuck taylors well into the 4th decade of life.
http://athenasmom.wordpress.com/
lots of lay-ups AND assists!!!
2 pairs for $90 at any sweatshop loving chain sneaker/athletic apparel store
Asics for life!
wp like “winning” in comment threads. it is perhaps the entire reason wp start them in the first place.
I’m a dangerous man that does not need the internet to act like a man ‘Buckeroo’. F.y.i. you spelled you’re wrong. Take a spelling test and get back to me.
Excellent post. The satirist has hit his stride in New Balance running shoes.
Oh, true, true. Not only are they respected more for running, but for running in retro-style shoes to boot. There is, indeed, a pecking order….
I’ll stick to my converse high tops … chuck taylor all stars.
aka … “Cons”, “Connies”, “Chuckers”, “Chucks”, “Converse”, “Chuckies”, “Chuckie T’s”, or “Chucker Boots”
Check out “The Beefs” … http://whatsmybeef.wordpress.com/
Stevo
What you don’t seem to get is that this blog is supposed to be a joke- on you. You take it seriously, and it makes it that much funnier.
Bob Weir wore New Balance in 1980. That was the first I saw them. They made him dance real good. You’re quite right, white people have loved them for a long time.
Another great post!
White people love an ambiguous diss.
My feet are too wide for other shoes.
You scored with the Fresca mention, but hot dogs? I don’t think so. Not unless they’re made of tofu.
huh?
Nice one happyjack thought they would have moved on to someone elses moniker by now
farvel vi ses
I shop for running shoes exclusively at those specialized “running stores,” and I’ve never even tried on a pair of NB shoes, much less bought a pair: i’ve always ended up with Asics, Sauconys, or Mizunos.
I wonder how I missed out on the New Balance thing….
Well, New Balance and Asics make superior shoes. Thats why I run in them.
I wear my NBs to shop at WholeFoods, and to take out my recycling (it’s the law in Manhattan. Where I live.)
I wore NBs while getting my BA, and in law school. I sometimes spill coffee on my NBs.
http://athenasmom.wordpress.com/
Hit the nail on the head with this entry. I hear New Balance isn’t even sweat shop free any more. Like the shoes are only assembled in America but the rest of the shit comes pouring out of industrializing countries.
Are they even comfy?
What about white guys that do karate and hardly every jog?
Yo what about the soy latte?
You mean Shakespeare?
Bin Laden is a Jew? I bet that is news to him.
Dude you’re a white guy so don’t talking about getting lynched Italian style 🙂
No kidding, how did I become a jerk for liking Asics? They mold to your feet within the first 50 miles of road work. I love them.
To true … why too many slow white guys wearing New Balance Shoes.
I’m white. I only run when chased and I own a pair of New Balance shoes. However, I live in the mountains and they are the “all terrain” type of New Balance with the grippy tread that I wear for hiking. Good shoes. Lots of traction and they breath well. I knew absolutely nothing about the sweat shop stuff till I read this. I bought them because I needed shoes for the trail and the price was right. They work great and I’ve got no complaints. I’d recommend them to anyone.
I pooped my pants
I’ve been wearing them for that reason, too. I wore them back when nobody knew about them except hard-core runners. And I curse all the white people who bought a lot of New Balance shoes, making them cool, and then stopped buying new Balance shoes, making them a dated fad.
For real – Faith? Anyhow – here is a link for you.
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/03/50-irony/
Are you sure Faith? Anyhow – here is a link for you.
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/03/50-irony/
Thanks for the wp grammar faux G-Man. PS How did you resist editing the “Anyhow”?
I have Birks… and I would like to think I am the whitest person I know… I wear them because I walk everywhere…
but apparently you’ve not been to downtown toronto where birks are all the rage with the catholic school system… and the ‘905ers’ (read: suburban brats)
and how the heck did my picture get embedded with my comment….
wp love jesus sandals.
wp love small regions of europe that continue to fight for cultural recognition and autonomy.
you’re right fake-happyjack (the original) . i admittedly stretched to try to make that one work, but you put me back in my place.
wp love putting people back in their place.
wp love overlooking kenyans who run like 400 miles through the desert in bare feet.
wp like using theoretical crocs to wipe their arse so they end up with poo on their hands.
wp have so much money that they can buy a boat for each leg…and then buy shoes for each boat!!!
Has it ever occured to you, and I’m sure it has, that people in general like New Balance because they’re good running shoes.
For example: I ran track in high school, my dad is a marathon runner and he suggested when I bought new shoes for my hurdling and sprints that I wear NB, they’re pretty light, the cushioning and the grip are good and they’re not butt fuck ugly.
Ta da, I’ve been wearing and running in NB’s for like 10 years.
P.S. I’m black, ta da. Sometime you’re shit is good but more often than not you’re full of shit, satirical right?
what about rainbow sandals? those have stayed in white-style for quite a few years now.
i’m white and i don’t have new balances and never have. but i do have rainbows.
Are you a black magician…you keep saying “ta da”.
White people love to say “ta da” and “basically” and “right?”
Maybe you are white? That would explain the New Balances.
Your dad is black and ran the marathon? Maybe your a Kenyan magician then….
I just bought a pair of NB shoes, wanting to buy a “local” made product. I even paid more for them over an equivalent Nike pair. I go home and upon looking at the label see that the shoes were infact made in China.
Go Figure.
At least the Nike shoes said it right on the box.
NB hid the fact, probably cos they know their sales will plummet.
some models are made in usa, some are not. the usa models usually say “usa” on the back. woo.
me: two pairs, 991 and 992. usa-made.
If you don’t get something, best not to broadcast it by posting.
Dammit! Now I have to get rid of my Brooks running shoes. Or are they still ‘white enough’? This blog has changed my life, I am white, but with this blog I am now able to live whiter than ever!
I thought people bought New Balance because they are well made, my podiatrist actually recommends them.
Did you know New Balance where actually in style a couple of years ago. Many black and latino kids were wearing them in NYC
New Balance?…. never heard of them until today.
What the hell are rainbow sandals?
That is correct. I am really a man.
Wow, Clayton, you’re so well spoken!
White people like well spoken minorities, it’s diversity without the danger.
This blog is funny only if you are truly laughing AT the pitiful pretentiousness of “white” culture. (anglo-UScentric people like to think that the US is whitey central but I doubt Italians are rocking New Balance sneakers).
The fact is, most “white” (anglo-UScentric) people like this blog because it flatters them, not for its humor.
Next and last post: White people like the guilty pleasure of flattering their taste for guilty pleasures(in hilarious prose)!
That said, I find this blog supremely funny bc it it shows what pretentious, culture-leeching, dysfunctional people (of any color) are like. Just remember smart people are laughing at this blog not with it…
http://dachiworld.com
that makes em in style? lame!
You’re still in music, so you’re in stage 2 of white peopleness (hipster larve). Soon you’ll buy a house, and using it as your cocoon eventually emerge a fully formed enlightened white person.
I’m wearing that exact pair right now! I love this. Anyways, too much time on the computer, I gotta get outdoors…
Brooks are pretty low-end, White Person wise. The correct footwear set, in order of caucaso-correctness, is New Balance, Saucony, and Asics.
I like New Balance just because they do not look like moonboots. Nike shoes are lame. I really could care less where they were made. That is one for Whitey!
The Roman ruler Ceasar didn’t want to execute Jesus, but try as he might the religious/political sect forced his hand.
In a last ditch effort he decided to pardon one criminal slated for execution that day. He gave the choice to the people (as was the custom, if I remember). The people (jews) chose to free a criminal instead of Jesus.
So even today, the dead-christ worshipers (christians) blame the jews for killing their mascot.
I in no way believe that this is Christian Lander. Canadians aren’t douchebags.
americans don’t know anything about canada, I assumed everyone had gotten that from south park
birkenstocks for rich kids (not hating it’s just true). sooooo comfy.
Ruth, if you had the endurance to reach this comment. White people can avoid the ignorance of referring to every African country as Africa by learning the savvy phrase “Sub-Saharan Africa” and thereby seem to correctly identify a geographic region.
Don’t forget the gnashing of teeth when it was unveiled that your $70 college sweatshirt was made in a sweat-shop. And then there was that Kathy Lee sweatshop stuff. WP “decries” sweatshop labor but still embrace the product!
The upscale NB’s that cost over $100 per pair are made in the USA and are a staple of white fashion. The NB’s you’d find at Shoe Carnival for $39.95 are made in China and the wrong kind of white people wear those.
Interesting, but I have never owned a pair of New Balance shoes. I’m a long distance runner, and I wear Asics. I’ve tried on NB, but Asics always won.
no he’s not Scotty. But the people of the era of which we are speaking had similar feature to bin Laden than to your “modern jew”. Read a book, but first reread my post so you don’t make comments like the one you just did.
I love that this was posted on the Eve of the Boston Marathon…which covered such white people activities as marathoning and drinking microbrewery beers on the street. Also, love the fact that I can see New Balance corporate offices in Brighton from my apartment window. Extra white points for me!
Touché
The last time I was in Manhattan was August 2000 during a record breaking heatwave which knocked out power in the Bronx. Naturally I, Canadian, wore my sandals (with khaki shorts, of course) as I did the tourist thing all weekend.
I might well have been the only individual within a 50 mile radius wearing sandals.
I’d been to Manhattan in 98 too and my first impressions were 1) wow, lotta cops here, and 2) lotsa white people wearing jeans and sneakers.
Jeans and sneakers will get you barred from most clubs in Toronto; I know Torontonians who don’t own actual sneakers, or non-tacky jeans for that matter.
There must’ve been some huge Seinfeld effect, multiplied by our ol’ friend irony. What could be more ironic than Manhattanites dressing in a manner that would get them barred from nightclubs anywhere else in the world?
On the whole, though, good people.
This is great,
I listened to one of the “jerks” who wouldn’t shut up about Asics and nearly a year later I’m glad I did.
Sweatshops or not, they’re probably the best running shoes I’ve owned.
well done, especially the day before the boston marathon. i wonder how many of them were wearing NB…
What is amazing is that someone can post this exact same one line post in every “Stuff that White People Like” blog post and it will literally generate dozens of responses every single time. Amazing ability to generate discussion by just a simple Ctl-C, Ctl-V and watch the people line up to discuss. Amazing.
Running ‘retro style’ is a concept that frightens me becuase it implies a return of short shorts as everyday running gear. Turkey-white thights everywhere! Aaaaaaahhh!
New Balance are the ugliest sneakers out there but they make the best running shoes out there.
Horning? Jesus was horning? I think you meant “homing”. Big difference. Huge.
Damn things are the most comfortable shoes I have ever had on my feet, save for a pair of Rockports back in the mid-nineties. White or not, I love ’em and will never buy any other athletic shoe while they’re around.
I love my Birks, too.
Goddamn, I’m white.
is your doctor white?
Venky, babe, let he who is without grammatical/spelling sin cast the first stone.
yet another great post. i was yelled at for buying nikes (in Portland, OR of all places) and was told that NB were the only shoes “someone with a conscience” would purchase.
puh-lease.
I have really high arches on my feet and when first turned onto New Balance by a shoe store employee it was because they accommodate foot sizes with really high arches. Then again he was a white guy, the shoe store was in Manhattan, I was living in Brooklyn at the time, right around the corner from a micro brewery. Guilty as charged.
White people also really, really love Rainbows. And, like how they wear shorts all year round, will wear them even in cold weather.
Crizz, it’s “we white folks”.
/me spits at said moon as ‘tard’s misshapen lips curve gaily into a smile.
Can you say “black as my soul”?
Ever have a Chicago-style hot dog? That’s some white shit.
Goddamn whippersnapper. When I was your age, I was rockin’ NBs. I had to walk to school in four feet of snow in my NBs. Unappreciative little turd!
You pitching or catching?
My New Balances help me navigate the remote control much better than Asics.
I wore old school Chucks in junior high on the basketball team. Fallen arches were my friends.
Well, that’s rather redundant. We whites know brothas can balance.
White people like making a huge stinky-ass, shit-stained mess outta nothing.
Here’s to you, dickweed.
/raises glass
What about the ’80’s camel toes? That’s keeping in touch with the old-school skank-hop community.
Uppity white people like to pretend “crap” is a horrible word.
As a geezer who has seen it all (age 64) let me say that today’s ASICS are like the original PUMA’s. When I ran track in H.S.
(59-62) all best shoes were Pumas. Tennis
was strictly converse-low-cuts thru late sixties with Chuck Taylor hightops for BB
at College level during same period. All big changes came in 70s. NB always looked too plain and clunky for my tastes, thus I run in Asics whose design is “way cool(er)” than NB. The old tennis player in me still prefers all-white for street wear with minimal color piping–very hard to find today–lately taken to wearing Wal-Mart(yes, uncool)all-white(or nearly so)Dr Scholls. Don’t even get me started on today’s “real” tennis shoes–most are
uber-clunky even if more comfortable on
feet. Used to wear Treadhorns years ago.
um, this is definitely NOT christian posting these comments. he can spell.
Another funny entry, another plethora of humourless posters commenting on it.
Guide to reading SWPL:
1. Read entry
2. Laugh / get offended
3. Bugger off on your merry way
Yes, I’m aware I’m breaking #3 (but I’m white, so rules don’t apply to me:)
Yeah, and you hear how he talks. What a bonehead. I hope W drops dead of chronic stupidity.
Another funny entry, another plethora of humourless posters commenting on it.
Guide to reading SWPL:
1. Read entry
2. Laugh / get offended
3. Bugger off on your merry way
Yes, I’m aware I’m breaking #3 (but I’m white, so rules don’t apply to me
If children REALLY didn’t want to work in sweatshops, they would have run faster.
RAINBOWS are my footwear of choice no matter what season, what the occasion, they are the BEST. You better never be caught wearing a pair of “new” rainbows! They need to be broken in.
What’s “PCU” and why shouldn’t we make fun of vegetarians? I mean, come on…
You’re quite welcome. I enjoy your blog. Like I said, I find it funny.
Analysis stings, huh? Maybe I should have commented about rainbows…
Was the “moron” comment satire too?
a loyal reader,
http://dachiworld.com
This whitey rocked herself some kangaROOS back in the day! I carried EVERYTHING in those little pockets on the sides!
WTF was wrong with those people? WTF could ANYONE get into those stupid-ass pockets? I suppose a tiny condom might fit, or an origami dollar bill, but other than that, it was a stupid gimmick.
Yeah, he’s black. His white alter-ego was Lyndon Johnson.
I’m nouveau Balance. I found mine on the cheap rack at Nordstrom Rack.
I agree.
And people should stop referring to everything in North America as “North American”.
oops. It looks like I may have gotten suckered into thinking that Clander called me a moron.
poopy heads
Back to work drones!
…and blacks should stop referring to themselves as “African American”. Most of them have seen as much of Africa as I have.
My brother is the epitome of white. He’s a computer genius, is married to an Asian, has a half-Asian son who attends Montessori and has never spoken a word of baby talk. He’s teaching my nephew the value of a dollar and now he hoards every penny he gets. My brother is a vegan and will not wear animal skins, including leather.
And he drives a Camry.
I’ll send you his address so you may ship his King Whitey crown to him.
White people love Montessori.
My nineteen year-old is a bigger slacker than yours.
White people love comparing their child, however big a loser he or she is.
i’m a little disappointed. i have laughed at and totally agreed with just about every post until this one about new balance shoes. i don’t think nearly as many white people love them as is implied here.
wp love discussing the evolutionary arc of tennis shoes.
Motley, do you not remember the post about what’s best for poor people? They need to get second jobs at the McDonald’s in my neighborhood because the lines are getting too long.
Sheesh! I offer you an answer and you completely disregard it!
Oooh…is the large foot thing true for red-haired white guys, too?
HAY HAY!
White people prefer French models to USA-made models. They don’t cost as much and don’t marry other celebrities.
Lemme guess what was on the WB last night…COCOON?
White people love the WB.
I’m gonna tap me some-o-dat duck.
Fuck yeah!
did anyone mention rainbows? wp love rainbows!
“Jumping the shark” is when you have perfectly good search engines to look this stupid shit up so you don’t come across as being a brain-dead pig-fucking hillbilly loser who can’t navigate to Google.com.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, assweasel.
Yeah, but you have to check closely to make sure they’re female.
Li’l fuckers like to trick white people.
Oh, and he has a condo in San Rafael.
I have 301s. The only thing wrong with them is that they’re 500 less than the 801s.
And they’re speakers.
…with a touch of black.
Um…what is anthropological about footwear?
Mine does, too.
Wanna hook up?
Because you’re not racist as long as you have a black friend.
Myself, apparently.
No one asked you.
I think there are entire sites for that.
They’re called “Jungle Fever” or “Blacks on Blondes”.
Weren’t the Basques black?
White people like html that doesn’t work.
Are you the same people who do stuffethnicpeoplelike.com?
That shit is even more offensive!
I’m white and LOOOOOVE rainbows. They are so comfy womfy. I’m surprised they were not mention…..rainbows I mean. I’m surprised nobody brought up RAINBOWS. They are as gay as they sound. I think their the whitest, except rainbow colored….which is all colors. You know, like the colors of the Rainbow. Except mine are brown…like poo. I like poo b/c i’m a gay man…well, at least the smell.
you are
you’re
your
RAINBOW
i understnad the irony of why it’s funny that white people try to be all liberal and accepting of other cultures, but i don’t think its a bad thing necessarily. Like it’s great to poke fun at oneself, but i like that white people are trying to convey this new and improved version of themselves. god knows we’ve done some bad shit in our time. can’t we celebrate our newfound sense of guilt?
Celebrate all you want, just do it in comfort with a sweet pair of Rainbows.
I beat my immigrant workers with nifty Rainbow sandals. This site is my redemption.
I also repent to the Black Jesus.
See where that got you? No one knows you here.
Move along, Asics-lover.
The word “marathoning” per Merriam-Webster.com:
noun: LEARN THE EFFING LANGUAGE, DOUCHEBAG.
Okay, I’m a dipshit. I meant verb. Goddammit.
“Naturally I, Canadian”…
What kind of a shit is that? Take that crap and leave it in Canada, boy.
I have dingleberries. Wanna pick some?
So… Should my white tribe feel guilty about NB’s, or not? It’s just that there’s a long wait to get onto the white people’s guilt list…
Wearing rainbows?
Yes, there’s some serious brand loyalty in the white community for these sneaks. And Asics give them a serious run for their money. My brother, a marathon runner, has bought only Asics for the past 8 years, and I’m sure there are plenty of white runners who’ve done the same with New Balance. I thought they were only girl shoes for the longest, but apparently those teal and marine blue colors are meant for men too.
http://spinachflame.wordpress.com/
Piss off, Dungeons and Dragons. Bald emo lipstick wearing unathletic lightsabre wielding pussy.
On the white guilt trip tip, let’s try arial shows (those airplanes crash into the crowd way too fucking often).
http://spinachflame.wordpress.com/
Apparently, your brother runs marathons, apparently.
Well, I know I certainly have done some bad shit. It’s usually that cheap, Mexican skunk weed I get when I don’t have much cash on hand. But, I know I’m giving to the community when buy that crap, so I don’t feel too bad. I need to get glaucoma or cancer or something so I can get a script from a doctor for some really good medical MJ and stop smoking all this crabgrass that comes from TJ and shit. I could be half blind and sit there and get totally stoned, listening to ABBA and eating fruit loops. Now that’s white living!
i think they just came out with croc sandals…. finally.
readthisduringclass.wordpress.com
i think they just came out with croc sandals…. finally.
Read This During Class
apparently
LaVey, I bow down to your mastery of the comment-reply
lmfao
New Balance is popular mostly among people who are:
a) not willing to pay more for nike and poor nike quality;
b) with foot problems
Everyone I know who wears them, black and white and Latino does so for comfort. They aren’t as ‘cool’ but they feel great – I’m told, I don’t own them.
musicle-chairs??
Did you mean musical-chairs?
Or better yet, muscle-chairs??
I want my muscle-chairs
I feel guilty for buying lettuce. If I didn’t eat lettuce or cucumbers we wouldn’t need so many Mexicanos up here picking lettuce and such. I think I am going to eat more meat and plant my own little garden to stop illegal immigration from Mexico into the US. I will not, however, get rid of my lawn boy; he’s from El Salvador, home of MS13, and I don’t want him coming back all pissed off and cut my head off and stuff.
I love New Balance shoes! Not for fashionable purposes of course. However, when it comes to running along side my white comrades you cant beat a pair of new balance shoes.
http://www.lullmengesha.com
http://www.lullmengesha.com
I don’t feel guilty watching that stuff. I don’t attend them personally, but it’s simply fantastic watching people get smashed into by a ball of flame hurling out of the sky. I laugh and laugh and laugh at all those idiots who stand around on an airfield watching pilots do crazy shit, knowing accidents happen all the time. What losers, they deserve to die–and their kids too, to stop the moron bloodline in its tracks.
Right on! 😉
I resent the emo remark. I’m on bipolar meds, dammit. And they’re working!
And I’m a female, so yes, I wear lipstick.
Cockweasel.
Yeah, what she said.
Actually the New Balance 990 was the first running shoe to cost over $100
Yeah, what she said!
No, it’s not. “To sound intelligent” is shorthand for “to sound like you are intelligent.” It’s the same usage as “to seem intelligent,” which is also correct. If you want to sound like a tard, though, by all means say things like “sound intelligently.”
White people should also feel guilt for the regrettable rap career of K-fed. If the other white kids in his class would have accepted him, he would have joined a fraternity like his other white brethern and his rap career would have not evolved beyond singing Shaggy covers at Wing Dingers sports bar.
no i meant “horning in” as in taking a share of. “homing in”: I don’t think Jesus was a cruise missle.
White people should feel guilty for wearing dreadlocks.
I didn’t link because I wanted everyone to give all their attention to my dingleberries.
Are your balls all wrinkly?
White people should also feel guilty for ruining “ebonics”. My caucasian ass often misspoke street lingo, and I ain’t down with that no more, shawty!
Rainbows are the choice of the gays and have been monopolized by them, this symbol of God’s promise to never flood the earth again…until the ice caps melt.
Gay white people love rainbows and because of this, I can never use a rainbow in anything I do.
SELFISH, GAYS! I WANT MY RAINBOWS BACK!
Only white people on a blog celebrating/poking fun at the things white people love would have this argument.
You guys are both very intelligently in my book, no wait that does sound retarded. Badabash you’re sounding retardly.
As a jogger, I do prefer the feel of Nikes, however, I do like the simple lines and minimalist styles of New Balances.
Like many things that white people love, I talk more about jogging than actually doing it. So, at least I look good with my suede new balances on talking about jogging.
Kathie Lee makes her clothes in sweat shops and it doesn’t stop my white ass from buying them. But, Kmart is the only store within a hundred miles of where I live.
GO ahead and diss my Wilson running sneakers and catch yourself gaggin on my six shooter!
I always thought the “N” was a “Z” and people were wearing Zips.
The lord blesseth Nikes only. Those who wear New Balances will not be allowed on the ball park frank shaped spacecraft following the asteroid on its way to the paradise like afterlife. Take Heed! The end of the world is neigh!
Our souls were protected by the highly evolved chemical engineering technology incorporated into the soles of our Nikes. Although the average age of chinese sweatshop employees is 12 the average age of doctorate degrees is 9 and believe me, in China these distinctions are not mutually exclusive.
Oh yeah and Pastor Applegate protected us with his loving angel halo of death and skittles.
This blog is, as always, terrifyingly accurate. I actually own the pair of shoes pictured, how sad is that?
Um, OK, female Christian Lander – if that is your real name, Anton LeGhey\Triple Sock Puppet, emo binge-and-purge television watching spiderweb on neck tattoo unwaged gimp.
“Evidently” offers a superior White Person experience.
huzzah! another 1000 hi-jacked comments comin right up sir!
What is the topic? jezus smoked his new balance ebonics?
Not as wrinkly as your bald emo head.
I have new balance shoes, but I only bought them because they were on sale. I actually had no idea that new balance shoes weren’t made in sweat shops. So I guess since I wasn’t aware, I’m white by accident. Whoops.
yes. i’m wearing mine right now. and i’m training for a 10k if that matters.
you sir, are a bounder and a cad!
i am jane, and i am a girl!
or, as i already said, a on old biddy.
but not a man!
what a weird funny thing to do, pretend you are me.
What about Converses?
Grammar is the last refuge of a white person..
I don’t care about any of the comments above. Did not read any of them. Just wanted to say that the ‘Note” was great. Very John Stockton.
White people from what I’ve seen tend to care more about comfort versus style. Nikes are generally more stylish and hip than than New Balance. It’s like having a Saturn instead of having a snazzy foreign convertible. Why many people wear New Balance also has to do with they are the only sneakers that come in various widths! Triple EEE for narrow feet and extrawide witdths — anyone with flat feet and no arch or high arches and narrow LOVE these sneakers since you can find shoes that fit perfectly. And people who put the look and style first will suffer for fashion — like ladies in Jimmy Choos and Manolos versus those in comfortable and sensible heels like Comfort strides. So, the shaky conclusion? Whites — style challenged…lol. Maybe not but casual observations suggest this is the case.
I only wear Saucony’s (much cooler, therefore “whiter”, than NB’s) and only when I play ultimate or ride the eliptical machine.
Otherwise, I wear adidas (always flats) when I play soccer. And, some unknown brand of cycling shoe when I cycle. When I kayak, I wear no shoes.
Bow down to my whiteness/coolness.
BTW, if this blog existed 15 years ago, you could have put “White people wear Teva’s” I always thought they were lame, but a hella big bunch of white folk wore them.
(“Hella” is lame to, but a hella big bunch of white people use it, so it’s thrown in for effect)
My New Balances are in the 800’s
wp love mentioning rainbows when they know it will make wkowp want to blow their brains out.
I love new balance shoes! Why am I so predictably white!? This is ridiculous! But sadly funny all at once.
Thanks for making me so aware of my whiteness lol!
-KC-
http://www.artgonewrong.blogspot.com
I am putting a link on my blog to yours!
Does anyone notice how frequently we have repeated the brand names, New Balance, and less frequently Nike, Asics, etc.? The next time you find yourself browsing up and down the aisles at Target (OK, Foot Locker) inexplicably compelled to hunt down and purchase a pair of New Balance running shoes, don’t feel dismayed by your impulse shopping. Lander has conditioned you like so many Pavlovian pooches to salivate at the recognition of this appetizing brand. The “New Balance” post is unabashed marketing, folks. Woof!
NeW and Balance shoes aNd a SLeeveless NORTH Face jacket !! thAts perfecT saturday gear for white PPl…
Im white BUT i would prolly NEVEr wear new balance
I HATE EM THEY STANK!!!
IF YOU HAVE HATE IN YOUR HEART, LET IT OUT!
ive never ever wOrn new BAlance…
ha u funny mentoning an asian g friend!!!!!!
We must all forgive Christian Slater!
Well, I’m white, and I do wear New Balance! I didn’t, however, start wearing them because of anything Nike does or because they’re made/assembled in the US. I love Nike, too, but I primarily buy New Balance because they’re the only brand that comes in width sizes (for every model). Some of their shoes only go up to 2E, but most go up to 4E and some even to 6E. I wear 4E and can buy a pair of New Balance shoes, online, without ever trying them on, and know that when they arrive, they’ll fit perfectly. Most other shoes are too tight. Before discovering New Balance, I’d try on 20 different styles of shoes by various brands before I found one that fit. New Balance says that their shoes don’t require breaking in to start being comfortable, and they’re right! They feel great as soon as I step into them. If you disagree with this statement, you’re probably buying a shoe that’s too narrow for you, simply because other manufacturers only offer them in one width. I do have 3 pair of Nike Air Jordan XII Retros, and they all fit pretty well, right out of the box (but not quite as well as a 4E would), and the insoles are incredible. I’ve also got a pair of Pony City Wings that fit me perfectly and feel great, and a bunch of other brands of shoes that also fit well, so I’m not saying that only New Balances will fit me, but I am saying that New Balance takes the trouble out of finding a well fitting shoe, because they come in width sizes. I have seen some New Balance shoes, BTW, that, flat out, say on the tag in the tongue of the shoe, “Made In China.”
maybe crucifixion, is italian style lynching? i dunno.
this post was FABULOUS!
no, not this one, clayton.
he was sincerely just telling
a story that happened to
have the n word in it.
you’re like me, but you’re
a little trigger happy.
only a white guy would take shoe fitting to
such an extreme science.
new balance is old skool swpl
keens are new skool
Whiff on this one.
Try hiking boots instead.
.. ugh, i see all the white tourists in Hong Kong rocking that shit.
http://kennyheartshk.blogspot.com/
Lets just blame the jews for everything..will that make the poor and ignorant people happy? Nobodys knows what happened 2000 years ago. The bible is filllllllllled with contradictions and complete lies, I suggest anything written in the bible be taken not with an ounce of salt, but with a gallon of clorox. Any book written over 100 years after jesus died (oh and there is a complete lack of evidence he even existed, for such an important person of his day, not one of the major 90 or so philosophers ever mentioned him, and the 3 that mentioned a name with close spelling to jesus, they werent referring to jesus but to an ‘annointed one’, and that was a common term used in that day) and rewritten hundreds, if not thousands of times for the benefit of the government, should be thought of as fiction. I could give a list of stories and people and events of the judea religions that are exactly the same as the ancient religions of egypt, but im tired and suggest anyone interested to research similiarities with judea religions to ancient egyptian religions. Get over jesus, and all these suppose beings as gods, allah, budda etc. And I promise you will live a much happier life knowing this is the only life you got, sad you wont see your family when you die, but that just gives you more reasons to be with your family now. If there is a god and he/she/it is “benevolent” then they wont care you didnt believe in him when you were alive, otherwise dont waste your time praying, and go have a great exiting, memorable, and safe life.
Damned straight, as opposed to the original poster, who owns waaaaaaaaay too many pairs of shoes to be heterosexual.
Actually the majority on the religious right and Western Christianinty don’t hate the Jews at all. I would like to know what you base your assumption on. Can you prove that a MAJORITY on Christians hate Jews? Or is it just some? Some people are just hateful, but most Christians support the jews and Isreal.
But that would make a really funny, if confusing, bumper sticker.
Yes manly white men do not need the internet ,but they do love to correct folks grammer ,spelling , etc…
I wear NB because they make wide shoes.
http://www.culturallycool.com/earthdayindex.html
i’m a white guy and i love sniffing other dudes butts. i love cramming my face in a hairy crack and going to town! hell yes! i’d love to meet the cute redhead author of this website. i’d eat out his butthole all day! damn, i love a dudes hairy butt on my face. i can’t get enough!
How do you know he has a wide ass? Maybe he’s got no arches. Maybe he’s been made fun of his whole life because he looks like a big-footed circus man. He needs our support, not our hurty words.
http://spinachflame.wordpress.com/
Jesus wore New Balances.
Best. Response. Ever.
that sure seemed to slow things dow
down
Saucony?…Saucony?….WHITEY PLEASE!!!!!
don’t they sell NB in wallmart?
I think it’s “anal nitrites”.
Yes, they’re extremely comfortable. I used to be a runner, but after several knee injuries I can no longer run as much. However, I still wear them because they’re comfortable. That’s the main reason why everyone I know wears them.
I have 6-7 black friends, too, but people still call me “racist”.
/me cries.
No, but plenty of white trash shops there.
my point exactly
HPS, I meant musical-chairs. You got me. Thank you for pointing out my error. Like I said in my comment, I wish that we could do spell-check. –Jeff in Houston, Texas
Is that along the lines of meat curtains?
Now I feel silly.
I bought a pair of New Balance shoes this weekend and thought to myself, “What are these? Off brand Nikes?”
I suppose it was still very white of me if I bought them for running, though. 😛
Great Job Pennslyvania – you kept Hilliary in the race! Go!
Only because New Balance are made for white feet!!
White people can’t even pronounce Adidas correctly…
Johnny Cash knows a boy named Sue.
And you are the weakest link.
Good-bye.
You forgot the hyphen between “Doritos” and “eaters”.
Loser.
Are albinos white no matter what race they are?
That’s why I wear a Spurs hat!!!
Hey, this blog is for WP only…
Bravo! I’m impressed you know that many adjectives to describe “gimp”. I’m sure the truly gimpy will bow to your superior intellect.
But WP like to wear Nike sunglasses. Hmmm, I wonder where they are made…
You sure like the non-word “emo” a lot, don’tcha?
You’re special like that.
Out of the closet and into the rainbow!
I’M FREE! I’M FREE!
It feels so good to come out and not really be gay!
All right, smartass. Monkeys? Are you insane? They can give you the AIDS.
I prefer donkeys.
Been to the stripper factory yet?
how the hell do you get so many comments, Misch? teeeeach me. This is Noch Noch btw. Thanks for the blog invite. You should cover a story on crocs next..they’re the ugliest shit in the world…but I guess if white people wear them…
They also apparently a fan of the boat shoe now…I see them everywhere, just waiting for them to go out of style so I can get a pair.
I didn’t ask you to….so calm yourself
ima make my mom buy me this pair
http://www.nbwebexpress.com/newbalanceM574SGC.htm
I thought you should know that real runners don’t wear new balance. In fact, we look down on “runners” who do. Real runners don’t care how the fuck their shoes are made as long as they can train for their marathon injury free. If that means that my quick dry, insta-drain webbing has to be hand woven by a 2 year old (bless those tiny fingers) in a bottomless pit, then so be it.
*looking down at the blue and orange NBs on my feet…hanging my head in shame*
Damn. When did the internet start being grammatically correct? You should really get the stick out of your ass.
I love this blog! and I’m not even white, not the poking fun at white people aspect, but poking fun period, it’s just so damn funny! I have discovered that I must have some caucasian lineage because my nb’s are totally worn out and I ask you… who doesn’t love an expensive sandwich?
Keep on trollin’ baby — Fred Durst, Limp Bizkit, “Limp Bizkit: The Movie”
I like how everyone leeches off the popularity of this blog and takes the opportunity to comment with a link to their own blog. Stop it. Seriously. If your blog was actually funny or relevant, like this one, people would actually read it and you wouldn’t have to leech off of other people’s popularity
White people also like to fuck with dangerous animals like sharks and grizzly bears until the day they get eaten by one.
wp from Tokyo who can’t spell their friggin’ url properly like repeating themselves:)
what, aadi-daas?
Will the real Clander please stand up.
I have a hard time believe that a writer of such an intelligent blog would be such a pompous ass and would make such horrendous comments on his own blog. If you are the real Clander then I think you’ve had one too many momosas / book deals and they’ve gone to your head.
You could at least give your critics a little more respect.
Very creative. New Balance, brings back memories. White people also like pepsetic shows…
http://hiddenvariable.wordpress.com/2008/04/22/girlicious-episode-10-finale-analysis/
Great scholarship bud.
And in regard to your last sentence: why?
ps. If you’re a hacker you should be ashamed of yourself, Clander has a reputation and, now, a professional title to uphold. You should just go back to fapping and leave this blog alone.
Don’t forget that some models of New Balance are vegan. Vegan shoes = beau coup white brownie points.
Some people no matter how hard you try, just cant get the god idea out of their head. So if you use the whole “benevolent” god idea, then it will give them a reason to not waste time on it, because some people just cant “quit god”. But since im such a giving person, and would want everyone to happy, I would want people to live their life as its their last life, and only life, and people cant do that unless they think something is afterwards, because we are all procrastinaters.
I like your moniker !!
I have New Balance shoes because another white person who is a personal trainer and co-model recommended them to me. I also now have lots of sports clothes, which are of the ‘performance’ type, and I am currently on an extended overseas trip in Brazil! But I don’t like to brag and am very wary of it… so I escaped that one! I love bottled water… hmm what else has there been. But I fit the bill on most things here. I’m white Australian. Thanks for this site. Hilarious.
Don’t confuse “well spoken” with passive, unaware or timid. The fact that Obama cannot get the white, male, over thirty vote. Is , in my opinion, the unwavering fear this group has of Black men, period.
The younger, more socially integrated white males have experienced a more day to day relationship with minorities and general and are better at assessing people because of it.
The older Whites, look from afar, assume, prejudge and continually get it wrong…..
Hopefully, things will be learned from this election cycle that will help in near future dealings.
When say “people”, who do you mean?
Anyway, I can only speak for myself, in doing that, I CAN tell you that almost daily, I have to navigate situations that make me ask, was that because I was tall?
I mean, why would that person treat me differently than the three other people who preceded me? Maybe it’s my suit, or shoes.
I was polite, I showered this morning, my credit cards are gold and black, so why was I treated differently?
Sometimes, I only have one answer. Have you put yourself in situations like that? Were there was only one possible answer for your actions?
Friendly criticism. I’m not sure if you’re responding to my post or not……
While I truly enjoy reading SWPL, I can’t help but think, write a new post, already! I can personally think of a lot of different post ideas, so I know it can’t be that difficult. In fact, I’m beginning to wonder if the only reason you are so slow is because you don’t want to spoil any of the reasons you’ve listed in your upcoming book.
No! The Others have found us! Quick, hide in the spelling errors! Oh, Jesus, this is Anne Frank all over again!
HA! I own a pair of NB and I am a black female…so what does that say about me? LOL! (still a funny post BTW)
http://www.msfriendly.wordpress.com
HA! I’m a black female who owns a pair of NB…so how does that fit into your NB explanation? (funny post BTW)…I mean, there’s gotta be SOMETHING to it though, because my students are ALWAYS making fun of my shoes! I wear Puma, Addidas, or NB…mainly NB and Puma.
http://www.msfriendly.wordpress.com
I only started wearing NB since my foot doctor told me to, otherwise I was Payless all the way………………………………………I couldnt care less who makes them,
Rah rah Walmart I love you too!!! made in china??even better!!!!
Yeah, New Balance, I have a pair. What’s interesting is I’ve noticed that they are very popular in Rehab and AA. Now that’s stuff white people like.
white hipsters wear them cus they are not as busy and more neutral and remind them of 80s thrift but new
I’m white and I really don’t care for most of the stuff on here. I think you should call this blog; “What Liberals And Hippies Like”
I like my guns and my truck and I use em too! Yeehaaw!!
New Balances are wider than most other running shoes. That’s why so many people wear them, white or not. And you know what they say about wide feet (sounds like white feet, neh?).
Keep up the good work on this site. I love studies in Whiteness.
To Mr. John Electric who commented above. How dare you insult me on my blog.
So you think I’m a pompous ass? Well, I’d like to pump your ass.
Really. I actually would love to pump your ass hard.
I think you are just jealous of my success.
There are only two groups in the world that actually like jews They are the Neocons and Christian Armageddonists.
I challenge anyone to add to this list.
PS I think the hatred between Jews and Muslims tops the list these days. Israeli human rights abuses, hatred, and torture of Palestinians is legendary.
The “Iranians” as they are called in LA, are actually Iranian jews. This little fact is for some reason hidden from Whites.
right on time with this post. i often notice yall’s shoes, and then i think, “what the hell does the “N” stand for?
as in the words of arsenio hall, “things that make you go “hmmm?”.
First cousins are allowed to marry in a majority of states, especially those with large populations of breeding age jews, like New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Connecticut, Massachusetts, etc.
First cousins are not allowed to marry in Kentucky or West Virginia, however. That’s why all the jew comedians make jokes about “Hillbillies in KY and WV marrying their cousins.”
West Virginia allows people who are first cousins by adoption to marry, but not those who are first cousins by blood.
about 3,000 years jews have been doing it. Isaac and Jacob married cousins. Abraham’s wife was also his SISTER, so the jews come by it honestly.
The “Jewish Encyclopedia” says:”Jews have married near relatives more frequently than the rest of the world. The marriage of first cousins and even of uncle and niece is quite legal and usual among them.”
“Applying the same method to English Jews, Jacobs calculated that 7.52 per cent of their marriages were first-cousin marriages. By another method W. Stieda found that there were 23.02 per cent per thousand consanguineous marriages among the Jews of Alsace-Lorraine as compared with 8.97 among Catholics and 1.86 among Protestants (“Die Eheschliessungen in Elsass-Lorhringen,” 1872-76, Dorpat, 1878). It would therefore appear that the proportion of first-cousin marriages among Jews is about three times greater than among the non-Jewish population.”
By their own words, there are “Kissing Cousins” and “Funny Uncles” ,all over Hymietown, yet their comics poke fun at Kentuckians for “Marrying their cousins,” when, in fact, it is illegal in the Bluegrass State.
It will always be taboo among the goyim, but screwing and marrying a cousin will never be illegal in jurisdictions where jews have political power.
View the attempted elimination of the FLDS as a sculpted takedown of a potential threat.
Religiously justified, ethnically homogenous & demographically successful, FLDS was a severe challenge.
Of course what is of most concern is the ability of FLDS to pro-create at rates commensurate with or superior to the alien nationalities inbound to the USA under the ZIO-Marxist Open Border policies.
FLDS is threat to the multi-cultural state and its domination by the ethnically self-chosen. Elimination of the FLDS destroys a successfully expanding American population, disrupts religious competitors, and pre-empts the solidification of this group into formidable social opponents.
The Social Engineers that monitor and sculpt US society in order to maintain their ideological and ethnic domination are taking down FLDS in a pre-emptive strike. This is what pre-emptive social warfare is all about. The move eliminates the POTENTIAL of FLDS linking ideologically and socially with other threats that are perceived to exist or have the potential to exist.
I think Hasidic jews are weirder looking and dress more bizarrely than the FLDS people, and they interbreed more often too. Anyone?
Burkas are funny looking too!!!
NB is so 2005. and you call yourself a hipster? get with the program, kid.
Dude, seriously! When you write an entire post to criticize someone else’s grammar, double-check your own use of commas, semi-colons, and dashes–or lack thereof. Sheesh.
Where’s the pant pooper??
Do you all realize that you are getting into ridiculous discussions about religion on a page that was created to make a humorous observation about sneakers?
Why don’t you move this useless debate to another forum?
ok, Here in Germany I always have to search around for a pair of NB when mine wear out, a lot of stores will not carry NB shoes because the Skins like them for the N on the side. How is that for stuff WHITE people like.
Don’t like em’. I only wear combat boots or Adidas sneaks.
*** yO Clander, when are you going to write about my favorite two topics every white guy loves…….
PORN & GUNS !
For your next one you should do “Protest China, wear “FREE TIBET” shirts and wave Tibet Flags made in China. That would do it that would!
ha!
i recently got a pair of NBs to train for a 1/2 marathon, and i’ll be wearing them for all my 5ks leading up to it…
this was a great post, and i read this blog from time to time.
but then again… i’m not white.
http://www.newmillenniumnegro.com
m dot
Yes, I own 2 pairs of NB shoes. My husband loves NB shoes. But we don’t own them to be politically correct. They happen to be the only decent brand with straight lasts that don’t stress and injure our feet!
We don’t do white guilt.
I wear New Balance because they are the only athletic shoes that seem to be available in wider sizes.
Nikes are terribly skinny for my EE feet.
speak for yourself loser.
Trex: a good suggestion and definitely funny material. It’s too bad that clander doesn’t do “serious.” Thank you for thinking.
Trex: a good suggestion and definitely funny material. It’s too bad that clander doesn’t do “serious.” Thank you for thinking.
No one can contest the popularity of New Balance running shoes among white people. At first I thought clander had struck gold with this one. On reflection, or more exactly on reading the posts, I saw the rather lame satire applied to the topic. Many have testified here to the quality of New Balance, the fit, comfort and support. There’s nothing funny about people buying shoes that don’t torture their feet. The Asian sweat shop digression is clever since white people do love to think that their infinitesimal contribution to “making the world a better place” significantly “helps” poor people or the environment yada, yada.
Clander, however, really blows it in his stupidly sarcastic concluding thought: “white people who jog are generally viewed as better than those who don’t..” White people and others feel proud for the obvious reason that they are simply following the doctors orders. Today the health establishment bombards us with exhortations to exercise in order to avoid the life-threatening consequences of obesity, high cholesterol,high blood sugar, diabetes, cardio-vascular disease and the like. New Balance shoes and jogging represent not so much a pretentious lifestyle choice like snobby taste in wine or modern furniture as a utilitarian commitment to one form of exercise in a sedentary age of junk food and unhealthy physical atrophy.
(Of course white people who exercise and stay fit are going to pull rank over those who don’t but the sense of superiority is ultimately grounded in the self-evident advantage of good health (and appearance) over poor health.)
Agreed.
Why are you announcing your views on religion on this site? The article is about New Balance Sneakers and yet your diatribe revolves around the myth of the Bible and all religious texts. I think everyone who appreciates the humour on this website understands sarcasm and therefore, understands how to decipher truth from fiction.
Find another soap box or better still, put another bumper sticker on your car to get your message out there. Keep fighting the good fight bro, with your latte in hand, crocs, and I Phone.
Can somebody please tell me the type of NB shoes at the picture? I wanna order them from usa, but i cant find them on the web site.
Thanks!
Jasna88
Hey I don’t know where this talk of religion is coming from, I thought it was about New Balance shoes! Anyway I love this site I’ve learned so many things about white folk! This is the first step in bridging the racial divide!!! Keep up the good work!!!
Reace relations were in trouble right from the get go. It’s the damned liberals screwing things up again. Next time I buy shoes and see some wide footed, hippy liberal trying on newbalance I’m going to wallup him one but good. Red blooded Mericans don’t where no hippy crap like that, dang it!
Eu gosto de Brasieiras muito!
His dad is Forrest Gump?
Hey Utah, nice, gimmie two!
Look it up, dipshit.
Anyone else have toes in their boxes? I prefer dildos, myself.
Another poseur who wants to be whitey when (s)he grows up.
you know who else love new balance?
homeless people. I see lots of homeless dudes around nyc rockin the newbies.
This post sure hit home. My wife must have every type of athletic shoe known to man. But me, on the other hand, may be the only white man that does not own New Ballance.
A JAP is a Jewish-American princess. What’s the difference between that and a Heeb?
What’s yer pernt?
NewBees are old hat.. Now white people must own Bathing Apes. The latest in overpriced and overhyped sneakers from Japan. Mentioned in rap songs even.
This was a joke.
And so was my thinking it wouldn’t be taken literally.
Funny, I hit your wife at home….and by hit I mean screwed, and by screwed I mean had sex with. She likes my Rainbows.
“Slapping hos” is also mentioned in rap songs. WP love slapplin hos. Especially nappy-haired hos, and by nappy haired hos I mean the Rutgers Woman’s Basketball Team….they where nikes and also love lay ups.
by “kind of comments” you mean the “Rainbows” comment?
you went to Rutgers?
Yo, don’t be hatin’
if you’re not wearing dunks you’re trash (an exception may be made for bapes)
If you’re wearing dunks or “bapes” you’re not white, or at least you don’t want to be white anymore
I don’t appreciate your humor….Grape Ape, Grape Ape
YEOW! It’s a gorill-ill-ill-ill-la!
Can Beegle Beagle come along? He wears rainbows.
And I love to get DRUNK!!!
And I’m not gentle with Grape Ape…I hump him like an underaged Thailand ladyboy.
Yep. I can’t be more white, and I just bought myself another pair of 608s since they are the comfiest sneaker I have found to date.
I’m small, hairless and asian. Kind of like a shaved siames cat. But I’m busy and can’t make your Ape bathing party…sorry ;(
ME TOO! I had a lot of sex on the set of Cannon Ball Run 2!
I’m actually going to Tornadoes28’s Gerbil Stuffing Party.
Grape Ape, Grape Ape!!!!
Hey tornadoes28 it’s called sarcasm!!!!But this is still my favorite site to visit!!!!
Sorry Anton, I stick by my story, “horning in” is a phrase. I suggest you look it up dipshit. Google might show you the way, just yuse these little things: ” “
That’s odd…..my mouth smells like your hand.
No….I mean my hand! Wait…….what?
So true so true! Nike is so 1995
This is dead on! I love new balance!
I agree…..especially since my hand smells like Shakespears butt…..
my hand smells like…my…..never mind.
You folks do realize the person signing in as clander is not the clander who writes this blog.
Hey! That pair of New Balance shoes were issued to me in Basic! I ran them out and bought some Merrels. They’re hot green. Pretty.
I’ve never had a pair of NB before. Might have to give them a try.
Just more proof that you are not the real clander.
There was a half-page article about New Balance Shoes today in the New York Times Style Section. It made me laugh and think of this post.
Anton, you sure spend a lot of time here. Don’t you have a job or a life like most people?
Now I get it Anton. You’re the basic inbred, mad at the world and blame everything horrible in your miserable life on minorities or anyone else you can point your claw at. Basically, jerk, you’re an asshole! I’m done with you!!!!!
The Colin Powell catagory – OW/HTBB.
check George Carlin’s White People monolog bit…..
(caution to the sensitive ears in the audience; Carlin favors shock value of Bad Words).
LOL!
Haha! I’m totally the jerk who wont shut up about Asics!
Add the Jews to your list
Actually, I think it’s kind of because NB has catered to White yuppie tastes, and now you can’t get anything from Nike that isn’t patent leather and some incredibly hideous combination of colors, scribbled on by a ball player. While yuppies now find themselves too old and sophisticated to wear their old Airwalks and Vans, which are now just for the skateboarding, future NB customers, they still want cool sneakers that are comfortable and “in.” I highly doubt that the main reason would be that NB doesn’t exploit kids, because wp will have no qualms wearing their hip, green, NB kicks with their chic Banana Republic cords, made in a sweatshop not-so-near you!
clayton- no, it was more directed to the people you were responding to, but my response ended up in the wrong place and I couldn’t move it! Obviously this blog isn’t aimed at you since you’re black. You do seem to take it pretty seriously though 🙂
Also, right on about white people being scared of black people, especially black men. However, Obama seems to have overcome that to a large extent, or maybe it’s just because I’m a college student, so everyone around me fawns over him, and I don’t see the rest of white America.
Which book, The Protocols? Mein Kampf?
I hope people realize that this idiot at TUCC is trying to evoke the comments of Rev. Wright, the Chief Pastor at Barack Obama’s church, the Trinity United Church of Christ. Half the time they include a link to the church’s site. I’m not sure if it’s just some racist, a crazy member of the church, or more insidious, someone on Hillary’s campaign trying to draw attention to the relationship between Obama and the TUCC. If you think about it, this person could simply be doing it on every blog they can. Look at how much attention it has gotten on this blog! I know it’s very conspiracy theorist, but this IS Hillary – more importantly, it’s politics.
but I’m a really good runner! my goodness!
bible thumpists and ground thumpists are ruining his once hilarious blog. why can’t you enjoy it silently, without reading into it too much. lightheartedness is not easy to come by this day, everyone wants to poop out their opinion.IMO..
-a happy person..
boy……..this comment board has turned into a cyber spamster fuck
Clander, you fool. Gorillas are great apes; Orangatangs are good but not great apes.
For a second there I thought you said cyber hamster fuck and I got really excited.
I love to poop out many things from my ass including hamsters.
and they’d know since they’ve seen them all. i think black men have bigger penises. on average. if you take
100 black men and 100 white men, 75 black men will have penises that are at least an eighth of an inch longer and wider. it’s so true.
three white men trying to invalidate a black truth,
although in general their research is pretty sound
if hiv infected, traced back to a WHITE homo from canada. and i’m gay so i can say dat shit.
maybe he meant bisque? but that’s a noun? hmmm
how can i use bisque as a verb?
you BEEEATCH! *SMACK* you got clander to respond to you!
i HATE you!
ARAHAGRRHGRGHRHGAHRR! i’ve been wanting
some feedback for ages, and you insult his
blog and he gets back to you! eeeeeeeeeerrrghhg!
yeah some dude wanted to get in my pants like 5 or so years ago and bought me a pair. i was impressed and then found his sister working for nike in pdx.
shame.
clander,
what in the world are dingleberries?
oh MY!!! christian..then i cannot sleep with you! that’s just nastiness.
clander,
is that really you?
you don’t comment a lot in your other posts.
As indicated earlier, this is a poser. clander has lots of class. It’s easy to tell the difference.
Sorry, Badabash. It sounds weird….. because, it’s wrong. Please don’t ever say that. Well, you know what- go on and say it. It will cause oodles and oodles of laughter.
I’m sorry but just saying that in my head makes me feel like i’m losing brain cells and I’d rather lose those the proper way; by drinking and other forms of debauchery. Acutally I’d even rather loose them by getting punched in the head, or some form of accidental oxygen deprivation.
But you go ahead and say it- and continue to get others to thinnk they are correct in saying it. Oh, how grand that would be.
I’m half white, and I have feet that are of average length, but of a large width, and New Balance has sizes in numbers but width sizes in A-E
Now I found that this was always good for my feet, I have 2 old pair for wearing around, and a new one so I look good at the gym.
I also play basketball in them, OMIGOODNESS.
How did you know??
shutup
Yep, I have my trusty pair of New Balance shoes.
There is a guy in my office who swears by these. This guy also happens to be wearing an outfit that I can only describe as a leotard.
Decision? Fuck New Balance, that ‘N’ couldn’t be any more painful than it already is.
Like James, I’m half-white, but unlike him, I don’t have any New Balance shoes, or any sneakers, for that matter. Man, I’m not white enough. My wife is white, though, and she has several pairs.
hey that second va girl is a fake! my word! my id has been stolen…officer!
I’m black, african american, negro, colored, shit.
now the posts are almost funnier than the blog!
big ups (see I am black) for the article in the baltimore sun, you’re moving on up, to the east side… you know the rest…forgot where I was maybe you don’t
This site needs a “White People Confessional.” For instance, last Sunday morning I put on my New Balance sneakers, my high-performance outdoor jacket and headed to Starbucks, where I purchased a non-fat Vanilla Latte and the New York Times.
At the counter, I saw “Juno” for sale and thought to myself, “Oh, I oughta tell my girlfriend it’s out on DVD. I know she’ll want to see it again.”
Of course they are! I wear them exclusively, I have bad feet from wearing cheap knockoffs that I paid less for.
YOU try and find a shoe that is totally made in the USA!
Pah, NB sucks.
Real runners wear Asics.
Real runners wear ASICS. NB sucks.
Um…new balance sucks.
I’m an asics/nike girl.
love,
elisa
Spelling? It was appropriate for the audience I was addressing, grammar queen.
muy best firends are english teackers.
and don’t use soap that contaminates our streams.
Those of use who walk upright need footwear.
Who the fuck cares. I mean it, I’m compiling a list to see if there is one damn person who cares.
You both need a life.
sounds like someone watched the Zietgeist movie
Enough with the “I fit some characteristic described in this blog, I’m so lame” posts.
Why is it lame? Every sub-culture has its markers. So what?
Tell a marketer your age, gender, job, & # of kids, and the marketer will tell you what you’ve got in your fridge with amazing accuracy. Does that make you lame?
And, why is it lame to be part of what this blogger id’s as a subculture: likes to give, learn about other cultures, be physically fit & healthy. Whoa! What a Lame-o!
As for the insinuation of racism in the blogger’s comment about private schools. Don’t most all American subcultures self-segregate? Yes, you can blame the fact that Vietnamese immigrants don’t tend to live among established whites on white racism. But, what about the other races/ethnic subcultures. They don’t tend to live among blacks, Mexicans, or Armenians either. Isn’t there some choice being evidenced? Aren’t they self-segregating from other races/subcultures?
Don’t blacks self-segregate? Chinese? Koreans? Poles?
Well, Friendly. You’re right about Obama being able to overcome the stigma, to a degree. Like you, he seems to be able to relate to younger whites, the more educated, the better.
I think that has to do less with education and more with the fact that younger Whites deal with Blacks on a more personal, social and artistic level than their parents or grandparents ever did.
Music being primary in the assumption of mine. Not only hip-hop and the culture that genre generated, but popular music in general. If you can dance and bob your head to someone else’s “heartbeat” (for lack of a better phrase), it would be very hard, I think, to hate that person.
It’s all about the process of knowing folks on an individual level, for all the obvious reasons such a relationship entails. This is really the first generation to totally accept one another, equally, in these types of social settings. To me, it will get better and better the more we share space with one another.
By the way, yes, I am truly passionate about being Black, because almost daily I must acquiesce because of it…
Lick my balls and stick a hamster in my asshole, now that is what being white is all about.
I’m training for a fucking road race and bought me some new NBs, and like some others here I also enjoy the occasional hamster in my asshole, white, NBs, and hamsters all in common. Once you go hamster you never go back, I also like to litter on the D-low.
I found a pair of New Balance shoes at work, left abandoned in my newly acquired cubical. I don’t know who left them there, but I was wearing uncomfortable high heels and to my surprise and amazement the shoes were exactly my size and fit like a glove! My white co-worker thought I was being gross. I quickly explained to her that it was the Law of Attraction in my favor, I was destined to have these free shoes since I had passed by the New Balance warehouse in Brighton, Mass two days before and obviously the universe new I wanted them.
As a black Hispanic I feel very weird wearing these sneakers. They are comfortable and not very stylish, but I wonder if people are wondering if I’m selling out or if I’m one of those uppity minorities. I figured since I eat organic food, shop at Trader Joe’s and behind closed doors listen to the Dave Matthews Band its ok to wear them. Don’t worry I’m not trying to be white, I wear a big afro so it balances out LOL
The fact that you find a way to interject your racist crap into every comment is really telling. My guess is that you saw your mother or wife or sister and maybe, all three, getting the back of their skanky cunts stretched by a man with a real penis. A brother ruined all three of them cunts for every other white man, for life!
If you want to play ignorant bigot, don’t hide behind this little punk site and laugh with all your faggot worshippers (yeah, I know who you are) or, at least whose name you’re using.
C’mon out in the real world, were we can actually discuss instead of all the name calling. Me too, but I respond in kind. I’ll not let you call me names and then treat you with respect, remember, you started with the innuendo and slurs.
“SINCERELY “telling” a story that “JUST HAPPENED” to have the “N” word in it???? Dude! WTF is wrong with you????PULLEEEZH!
I glad to see the king of pets the hamster getting the attention it respects.
The pleasure/pain of a hamster in your asshole is the best. I’m sure only whites are into this. It would be cruel to stick a poor little hamster in the pants of a black. Also around the holidays I do the drumstick, what about you?
“I sport New Balance sneakers to avoid a narrow path” – Phife Dawg, “Buggin’ Out” – A Tribe Called Quest
Clayton-
You’re really optimistic about this generation. Also, I have two questions. First, by “like you,” do you mean that I am able to relate to younger, educated whites or that I am a younger, educated white? Also, can you elaborate on what you mean by acquiesce?
http://foxattacks.com/blog/35838-fox-reporter-squashed-by-father-s-words-on-wright
Do these shoes cum in a pump?
Gerbils, Hamsters, should be in the photo at the top of the page not dogs, for the hamster is mans true best friend, right calender.
The writer’s of this post and blog are racist and uneducated young white guys. They (you) are under hard surveillance from the council. They shouldn’t throw around insults without backing or meaning. From their comfortable, parent-funded lives, they joke about subjects that are no joking matter. Everyone that reads this discriminating blog should be ashamed of themselves. Please do yourself, and everyone a favor and go to http://wordpress.com/complaints/
and flag this blog as a racist black hole on the web.
None of us need this site here!
These guys do not need to have their voice heard. They do not have a right to speak for a race, or compare their race to anyone elses!!
Please help stop this blog from spreading the disease that they so playfully toy with and hurt emotions!
Complain:
http://wordpress.com/complaints/
shit and fall in it, fuck new balance, blow me, you wood whipping douchebags.
Dear white man in charge: you need a moderator so people can talk about your fucking articles instead of arguing about Judaism, making racist comments and quoting the Simpsons.
For an alternative to NB for people who, uncool as it might be for neoconservatives posing as white culture experts, still might like to buy shoes that are ethically made, check out No Sweat.org. They have good sneakers.
And speaking of Dave Matthews, a mention of him and Jack Johnson is overdue. Also, Angelina Jolie and her blackface acting needs to be cut into in any discussion of stuff white people like.
Also. We white people do enjoy a good slurpee.
Wide feet not white feet you idiots. Take note Nike Make wider shoes
may i also add the unsaid–white people love Tribe Called Quest and TCQ loves Nubies…Nubies help white people feel street smart, consciously….and hip, which we love
Hey, too bad Clander is DEAD WRONG: http://metastuffwhitepeoplelike.blogspot.com/2008/04/fighting-global-capitalism-re-96-new.html
…at least about the immorality of paying Vietnamese twice the country’s average daily wage to cross-stitch sneakers:
* Vietnam’s average monthly household income: $32
* Average monthly income at a Vietnamese Nike factory: $59
By buying Nike shoes, you’re almost doubling the buying power of Vietnam’s poorest residents. Kind of puts a damper on the anti-globalism fervor of “Stuff White People Like”, doesn’t it?
Whoops!
In contrast, the average wage in Maine is $16.90, or $33,080/year. In New Balance’s factories in Somerset, Maine, workers are paid $15,904/year. That’s HALF the going rate in Maine.
That statistic bears repeating: In Vietnam, Nike workers are paid TWICE the nation’s average pay, but in Maine, New Balance’s worker are paid HALF the state’s average pay.
Nike: 200%.
New Balance: 50%.
Nice try, Clander. You fail at economics.
lol!!! =) this is so funny! If you want another funny site, go to cstarr.wordpress.com! trust me, it’s super hilarious!
here is a link to that site, sorry http://www.cstarr.wordpress.com
Except Nike is outsourcing their product from another country, and helping their economy. At least new balance is in the usa…and pays their workers 15,200 dollars more a year then nike. Yes, nike pays more then the adverage worker there, but when considering 80 percent of the entire country is in poverty, is it really that much? O THANK YOU SO MUCH NIKE FOR PAYING YOUR WORKERS 708 DOLLARS A YEAR!!!!!….sarcasm….. im sure the nike workers would much rather be newbalance employees because they would make $15,000 more a year. Your theory is seriously flawed, and completely ridiculous.
omg!!!! new balance sneakers! i remember those, we poor white folks got ours as seconds from the osco drugs at the mall in outer mongolia indiana. they had tread errors on the bottoms or some such “defect”. you could never tell they weren’t shoe store bought.
they always had red ones. it was like a yearly ritual for us, daddy taking us to osco’s to buy tennis shoes.
i have never understood the new fangled desire for “designer” foot wear.
they are tennis shoes. they funtion as foot wear for somewhat specific uses that nobody actuall seems to use them for. they are shoes. for most people red ball jets whould do just fine as all they are going to be doing is walking around.
for the record this white person buys his tennies at wal mart and i get the ones with the velcro because you can get them tighter.
i ran my marathon with a pair of new balance shoes on my feet. I personify this blog. sad day.
Uh oh! Blacks have moved into our Blog. I’m moving to new blog before they over run this place.
A few years later when this blog is cool again, as it will be entirely populated by blacks. I’ll sign back up to be a blog pioneer.
I just ran Boston in mine, need another new pair, as I lost control of my body function on some old ladies lawn, she had the temerity to yell at me, such effrontery. I mean after all I’m one of the beautiful people, anyway I finished in 3:20 period and all, a proud moment! I happy to share with anyone who wants more info on my moment.
New Balance are made in the USA!! NBs are the most comfortable shoes you can buy. Asics sucks! And Nike keeps suckering people to buy $170 basketball and running shoes that cost them $5 to make…so Tiger and Lebron can be paid $80 million per year! Nike sucks!!
oh don’t forget that new balances (at least most styles) are vegan. they love that shit.
Every race’s trash shops at Wal-Mart
Did you know the HIPSTER invented paper?
http://www.diehipster.com
You got it wrong, Nikes are too narrow for white folks feet. I like dem’ 4E’s that NB’s come in….. and I always thought it was the Bro’s that like “loose shoes?”
JB
Buckaroo, wow grammar queen is prettty harsh. You are a total badass…or is it dumbass
Longlivedeath-Your mother is a black man. Learn how to spell, learn how to read. Get a job and stop masturbating all the time. By the way, Jesus hates you.
If you can’t spell or have bad grammatical skills, then you caused 9/11
I just read the whole article on what white people like, I am white and the only thing I could find that applies to me, is the new balance shoes, I wear them because they are comfortable and I stand on my feet 10 hours a day at work,where I make $8.50 an hour. I could never afford the tuition for a private school for my kids and as I read through this list I realized that this doesnt apply to any of the white people I know but since it was brought up, I think its only fair that if white people get a list, then I think the blacks should have one too, so here goes.
THINGS BLACK PEOPLE LIKE:
Gold teeth- these are a must have, dont worry about your electric bill or feeding the kids until you take care of your grill.
Fried chicken and watermelon,mmmmm and dont forget to wash that down with some orange crush.
making up your own words…oh look who’s in the hizze.
blaming all your problems on white people- I know I can be oppressing at times but please stop robbing my house.
making fun of white people, I guess it is more fun when you know that we cant do it back to you without it being considered a hate crime or racism.
well, there it is, thats my list for you, and I would dare give my real name for fear someone might “pop a cap in my a$$”
if anyone out there is offended by my list be assured that I was just as offended by yours. Im just really getting sick of seeing things like this that catagorize white people as the villans, I can tell you this, me and pretty much all the people I know are to busy with our lives just trying to get by and raise our families, make a living, pay the high gas prices so we can get to work, so these white people you think you know may exsist but Im no better off than the poor opressed blacks, Im trying to figure out how Im going to make it to the next payday and if I’ll be able to buy groceries or pay my electric bill. the white people you are talking about are just as disgusting to me as they are to you, how would you like for Michael Jackson to be the spokesman for all blacks? wouldnt be fair would it.
aw. you all seem so mad.
white people also like to tell you when you are wrong.
my new balance shoes are made in china, and i’m proud of it.
wp like tribe, especially since a bunch of music writers and producers in wp mags like tape op have called low end theory “important”. not in ’94 though, back then they were ruffians.
i feel betrayed. i *trusted* you!
totally unrelated, but white, college educated adults like to give their children “unique” names. statistics, baby. the more college, the more creative license they feel they have. bythe is a fluke, my mother got out of high school by the skin of her teeth.
ok, informal poll. what is the percentage breakdown of this post between:
* frightening
* sad
* grammatical errors
I’m going with 22% frightening, 12% sad, and 66% grammatical errors.
wp like percentages
New Balance rocks. They’re the only shoe company that makes kicks wide enough for my wide, white feet.
This post totally cracked me up because I went to lunch with my father about a month ago and he volunteered to buy me a pair of New Balance so we could go running together.
Oddly enough, there is actually a New Balance store on the same block where we had lunch.
The white man is crossing over into my world in ways I never imagined.
I have bought this exact shoe for my last 3 shoe purchases.
LOL!
Wow, I’ll buy my own pair of New Balance shoes. Filipinos love Balance shoes and most of our local Basketball players use them.
Asics are obviously the superior footwear. Nobody knows this better than me because I actually am training for a Marathon. Yes that’s right while all of you are sitting at home sucking on your mom’s meatloaf I’m outside living the dream. It’s tough but I do it because I’m tough and better than everybody. No but seriously, all of you are stupid and don’t know anything about anything. Especially running because it’s for the special kids that aren’t coordinated enough for basketball. Asics are more expensive they are better and that’s final. I don’t get my shoes at Wal-Mart and go running once every white-trash-weekend. I go to a running store so they can look at my posture and how I run. This is because I care about my feet unlike you hooligans putting that crap on your feet.
This post was true… 15 yrs ago. Back then, NB only made shoes in gray, blue, & white, and production was based domestically. Now NBs come in an assortment of fashionable colors, and over 90% of their manufacturing is done in China.
NB used to be a brand that was mainly popular w/ serious runners and unknown among the general population. Around the late 1990s, NB branched out, and now they are commonly worn by all types. You might not see them worn by the rapper/gangsta/hip-hop crowd, but still. They are common among common ppl. Same is true for Asics. And like old-school NBs, the old-school Onitsuka Tiger Asics are also highly fashionable these days.
The specialty running shoe brands these days that are closest to what NB used to be like are Mizuno, Saucony, and Brooks. If you’re a white person who wants to impress his white friends, then get a pair of Newton running shoes. Look it up.
Very much like the way negros wear Nikes,especially air force ones.
Of course – white people cured polio. It’s important to be able to run fast when you are injecting hobos with experimental vaccines all day.
I honestly thought I didn’t own a pair, then just yesterday, I found some sitting in the back of my closet. I think I bought them, because they were the cheapest pair of decent running shoes I could find… then I gave up running.
__________
White people love: http://whatiwatchedlastnight.blogspot.com
What about Doc Martens?
Wow. My shoes are in style now? I had no clue. I just liked the way they look.
Grey 574’s in a 9.5D. They are walking shoes, but that doesn’t stop them from being the best pair of shoes ever made and usually available for cheap.
Hey I know a fat little spic named Oscar that wears these shitty shoes, he also has a prius, and wanted to vote for Obama, but the whole illegal problem stopped him. Are these signs that the little creep is trying to be white?
I may consider a pair of these shoes. I also may consider shoving a vile hamster in my asshole, it sounds so wonderful. I understand that the prius comes with a gerbil holder, how gay is that. Perfect car for P-town. Obama rocks.
I wear Earth Shoes! They have the negative heel and they have the perfect vegan universal black shoe that looks good with jeans, a suit, business casual, and just about everything. I only wear trainers when I am working out or in an arrangement where I expect my shoes to get dirty (like doing yard work or something).
and consequently the only pair of trainers that I own are a $15 affair from payless.
New Balance does make great shoes- they hold up pretty well and they are cushy and wide for those of use without narrow feet. I’ll admit though it is funny how if you don’t want to wear nice loafers or something with jeans you can throw on classic new balances and that somehow is acceptable. On a side note- is all this anti-semitism crap for real. I’m pretty knew to this blog but it seems that there are two types who seem to dominate- illiterate racists who invoke christianity as a convoluted justification and smarmy dipshits who say things like transubstantiating jesus blood drinkers rather than simply calling a duck a duck and saying christian. If you fall into this group, you must definitely suck and should not wear new balances because there sweet wide comfort would infringe upon your anal retentive lifestyles- have a nice evening!
*new
I like Jews.
I thought white people wore Sketchers.
crocs are the new plague. they ruin lives.
New balance…only athletic shoe company that has sizes in different widths and is easy to find.
You’re kidding right? Get with the program buddy. Your lameness hurts my feelings.
…tard
Are New balance for white trash people, like you? Nice to be a fucking scumbag.
I’m a fat lazy white slob, I wear new balance shoes while I rat on my co-workers and sell drugs in the parking lot, great kicks not just for runners.
#98 – This blog.
You forgot to mention Converse! Everbody loves Chucks.
Sorry…I’ve found New Balance sneakers NOT “Made in USA.” Check out them labels before you buy.
You’re right, Josh. If this asshole doesn’t take his tongue out of people’s ass long enough to look around, he’s going to continue missing the nuances of life, fart breath that he is!
Friendly, I know it’s been a minute since I’ve been over here, real lives will do that.
To answer your reply, I’d start by saying it doesn’t matter, in the scheme of things, about your age, race or sex. What’s important is that people share the same moral space. It shouldn’t matter about all the things that make us different, that’s one of the problems with our national view-point now, it’s THE problem, in my opinion.
But that’s something for another time. As for acquiesce; it means to give up. However, it denotes a wisdom or a morally superior surrender.
One would acquiesce if he were in an elevator with an older lady in a wheelchair, facing the back wall (her) and insisting on leaving the elevator first.
Even though she’s banging your shins and scraping your legs, you wait, patiently, until she finally emerges. Of all the options available to you under those circumstances, you choose the most noble, you acquiesced…
I hope I explained this in a way that would leave no doubt as to why one would use this word in particular, maintain
This one is also bad. New Balance is a SUPERIOR brand to Nike. Maybe the sweatshop thing had something to do with it because I understand wp like to do some charity while they shop, but New Balance is more comfortable than Nike, has less BULLSHIT than nike, it is all around BETTER. You are hating on white people for making a good consumer choice for once???
Last time I checked I a White guy (English, Scottish, Germany, and French background) and I don’t ike New Balance.
I do like sneakers, in fact I have well over 500 pairs. Most of my sneakers are Vans, Converse Chucks, Men’s Keds, Pro-Keds, Sperry Top Sider, Bass, Bob Barker, Trenton, Adidas, Nike, etc. As for style, I like slip-on the most followed by oxford (the 4-5 lace holes), the high-tops, and finally low-tops.
As for the high-top slip-on and high-top oxfords, I put them right below slip-ons and above oxfords. I have so few that I don’t normally put them in my style list.
I suspect I do own at least one pair of New Balance because out of 500+ pairs the chances simply are there.
I hate all those shoes. I guess I’m not white enough. I pretty much never talk about shoes either. All those brands you mentioned suck. The only people that wear that crap are frat boys and hippies. People that wear Earth shoes talk about how much they love the environment, but drive around in an SUV. Fuck that shit. The only people I see wear Birkenstocks are frat boys. And they scare me because they’re the ones who will be running this country someday. And if you think white people are the only people who talk about shoes, you are a fucking retard.
Who are you and how do you know my father???
I’m wearing my Jimmy Choo heels right now. I’m training for a marathon shopping session tomorrow. But, I ADORE runners. And my gays. whywelovethegays.com
If I get some will they make me look like I’m a runner or will I
just look like a white idiot whose out of shape?
It’s funny. Lots of layups.
LOL, I am as white as it gets and I own New Balance shoes, but only because they were the only ones that I liked in the colour I wanted. Had they been Nike, I woulda bought em.
The reason why I have a pair of New Balance sneakers is because they’re the ONLY major brand that makes ’em in a comfortable WIDE size (E, EE, EEE). Nike, Reebok, K-Swiss, etc… all of ’em have either no wide sizes, or they’re never available at the shoe store, or they’re as uncomfortable as hell.
HINT TO ALL SNEAKER/SHOE MANUFACTURERS… THE “D” WIDTH IS NOT THE AVERAGE WIDTH FOR MENS FEET!!!
Seriously, don’t you people have lives? Even taking time out of my day to make this comment is making me feel stupid. Get a clue. Get a life. Get an open mind.
I love this entry. I’m wearing my white New Balance shoes right now.
Hmm, and I thought the reason I wear them is because most other tennis shoes won’t fit my feet. The more you learn, eh?
Well I’D rather have really cheap prostitutes!
I am SO there with ya’ll on this one! Oh, wait – is “ya’ll” a “grammatical” bad? ;p
In regards to NB shoes – I’m white and I wear them because my feet are too damn wide and putting them in most other brands of tennis shoes is quite akin to placing them in a vice. I know, hard to believe – a white chick choosing shoes for comfort. :p
Yep, got my New Balance (need new ones though – mine are 3+ years old and shot) and my Keens and some Chacos…nobody else has mentioned Chacos – they rock. But they’re not pretty shoes, just comfy ones. 🙂 Oh yeah, and I have some birks too but don’t wear them much since I got the Chacos.
As a side note, I only payed white people prices for one or two pairs of these shoes…..I RARELY pay full price. 🙂
You are so right! I’m buyin’ a pair next week…
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Who is this Arsenio Hall? Perhaps a relative of Monty Hall. Lets Make a Deal.
I of course wear sandals, and would suggest that New balance are shoes for drug addicts, who may need to elude police. Also the shoes look cheap and maybe suitable for the welfare set.
maybe we stopped wearing Nike because they fall apart after a month. blacks are the ones that are stupid enough to wear Nike.
I’m the one who won’t shut up about Asics. No better running shoes under the sun!
Awsome, I’m White, Reading this Blog, and WEARING New Balance Shoes.
i shat in my shorts!!
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Hah, great article
yeah ASICS are pretty good shoes. I tend to alternate between ASICS and NB.
——
http://www.sporenormous.com
Need running shoes? How To Select A Running Shoes? All running shoes are not created equal.
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NEW BALANCE SHOES (ad by google.com)
There’s nothing wrong, and everything right, with caring about the conditions under which people are working to make the products you buy. All you NB loyalists who don’t care… grow a fucking heart, you selfish assholes.
It’s because of white people who don’t care about labor conditions that’s got us into this abusive globalization mess in the first place. Fucking slavers.
I buy my shoes at the discount shoe warehouses, and take what I can get. It’s not often that NBs are there, but sometimes they are. If I had more $$$, I’d try to get NBs at the sporting goods shop.
I THANK all the guilt-ridden white liberals who buy New Balance and keep some poor folks up in Maine in reasonable jobs. I THANK them for competing with Nike, and giving people an alternative to the sweatshoppers.
All you head-up-the-ass people making fun of NB and their customers – F. you.
Thinking that all white people are the same is ignorant and pure stupidty.
That’s the same as saying all black people are the same.
I believe NB shoes are also available without leather, which appeals to veganism.
which one are you?
beyond true, my boss has some of these bad boys!
I’m sort of starting to think being Jewish discounts me from being white. I just can’t think of any way in which heaps of these things apply to me. And anyones that do apply, don’t apply in the way the article thing says.
It’s important to remember that white people also distinguish between “jogging” and “running”. If you tell a white person you saw them “jogging” you are likely to offend them, thus white hobbies include “running”, not “jogging”.
white people do love new balance shoes. they use them to exercise outdoors (*which allows them to enjoy the weather,) and to workout at the gym. white people love working out at the gym. that should be #100. bc then we get to pretend like we’re healthy. bonus points if we actually get in shape, bc then we can feel superior bc we’re hotter than the obese masses of america. ps- please not that i put the comma INSIDE the parentheses- the only way it should be done!
I heard a young white man asking a clerk in a shoe store for new balance runners a few days ago and I thought of this post. 🙂
I don’t run, however I do yacht and for that nothing better than top siders.
Perfection is achieved when one wear’s Pearl Izumi socks with their New Balance shoes.
Like footsie nirvana especially if one has a pair (or two or three) of PI “Originals”. This discontinued style is like totally hard to find in stock, even on the internet. Their
discontinuance lends them an ultra-cachet because if you have them it indisputably confirms that you were “into”
Pearl Izumi’s “long ago”.
Eurosocks running-style are a close 2nd to PI’s in kewlitude !!!
This is spot on. I always play basketball and run on my treadmill while sporting a pair of New Balance.
O, u mad?
I kinda do hate Italians, but that may just be the ones from nyc.
good one hahaha
But…New Balance is one of the only available running shoes that comes in widths, so this whitee would need to go up 2 sizes to wear nike.
New balance is a great running shoe and they fit my feet well. I have tried others, but always come back to new balance. they have seen me through two marathons.
Those are some sweet shoes.
This non-running, non-sport-playing Jewrican loves NB’s. I have wide feet so they fit well. They’re relatively inexpensive and they look fairly inoffensive compared to other sneaks. I really could give a fuck if they’re made from Indonesian baby skulls or not. I’ve seen many non-whites rocking NB’s, particularly in the production and construction fields. Again, they’re comfortable and cheap. I think Whitey really has the Chucks and Sketchers on lock.
white people are not the only ones who like new balance…
legendary hip-hop vocalist biz markie proclaimed the sneakers to be “legit” in one of his “rap” songs
Same here, I haven’t found any as comfortable as New Balance 574’s for my wide feet. They’re also cheap, styled timelessly and great for jogging, but apparently white people only do that to feel superior to others.
I loved this site at first, but every post now a days is just an unrealistic, unfunny, toothless stretch of the imagination.
I suspect their just using posts as “clever” ads for companies like New Balance.
As I said above:
I loved this site at first, but every post since they’ve announced their plan to make a shitload of money from this site is just an unrealistic, unfunny, toothless stretch of the imagination that double as ads for companies like New Balance or whatever COMPLETELY NOT RELATED TO RACE products they can gently paw at in an attempt at satire.
I like run-on sentences, cause I’m white LOL.
my 4e feet dont fit in nike.
For the longest time I thought the N on those shoes was a Z.
And why don’t they make Kangaroos any more. I had a pair of those in the 7th grade and you could like hide your house key, a razor blade or a very small baggie of pot in your sneakers with those things.
You are one funny guy, I just found this blog. It is pretty amazing at the type of shoes people actually buy, NB’s aren’t that bad but I’ve yet to find a pair that are fashionable in any way. Taking a stand not to wear a certain brand because of how a business is run is the humane thing to do however. Jogging is overrated and bad for your knees over the long haul.
Playing competitive sports is much more rewarding and not nearly as boring. Just my 2 cents.
Sophie
“for the sports that they loved most: jogging, hiking, cross-country running, marathons, walking and being seen in retro-sneakers.”
You forgot Cricket.
wow, you’ve got a lot of things to say about someone you purport not to be interested in? Jesus is proven to have lived. The fact that he is God himself who died for our sins takes God-given faith to believe- but once you do believe you know that we (Christians) don’t serve Jesus so that we get to “see our family members again in heaven”. its so we can spend eternity praising God for his said sacrifice. You claim the bible is “fillllled with conradictions”- but this is seen through the eyes of a person who doesn’t want to beleive in God. the bible is harsh but true, it reveals the truth about God and who Jesus is, and as you can read in 1 Corinthians this is “foolishness to men”. God has to reveal himself to you through the bible so that you can see how truly great He is- I hope and pray he does this for you dude!! I hope you’re reeling at how patronising this sounds but I don’t care, I rather you get to know Jesus and think I”m a loser! ha ha
mizunos!!! kids! mizunos!!!
ps. thanks for giving white people some sort of cultural identity! much needed.
I guess I don’t hang out with enough shallow, white fashion slaves.
I wear NB because they have extra-wide sizes and let me run without hurting my knee.
Must be a fairly common reason – at the gym, I’ve noticed that most of the NB wearers are lifters who also run – same with all of the other ex-service guys who still run.
Hard to argue with shoes that don’t hurt you.
– MuscleDaddy
I agree I wear them solely because they have extra-wide sizes. My freakish feet don’t fit into most other shoes.
Her Monthly Friend: PMS*
PMS (Premenstrual syndrome). Also know as Psychotic Mood Shift, Pissy Mood Syndrome and Pass My Sweat-Pants, is defined by WebMD.com as, “a medical condition that has symptoms that affect many women of childbearing age. PMS can cause a variety of physical and psychological symptoms that occur just before your menstrual period.” This condition is apparent when your loving girlfriend turns into the Incredible Hulk after you drank out of the orange juice carton. Or when she begins sobbing after spilling a glass of milk. The most telling sign of oncoming PMS are when the skin colored nipple high Grandma Panties and old college sweat pants are brought out and considered acceptable couture. This period of the month requires extreme delicacy when interacting with the female species. One misstep, for example, leaving the toilet seat up, can lead to catastrophic results. Many men have met their demise for that very offense during PMS. A man’s common everyday interactions and conversions with women must be altered for this volatile period. Common banter like, “Hey Sweetie, what’s for dinner?” must be substituted with phrases like, “Wow, you look stunning in those gray sweat pants and fuzzy bunny slippers!” Pleasurable actives like back massages, going to the ball game and hosting a guys night are completely out of the question. And if thoughts of any sort of sexual interaction comes to mind, you are well advised to take a cold shower or “relieve” yourself.
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I’ve got that exact pair of New Balance – they were recommended by Consumer Reports, and they are also made in U.S. and on sale at shoes.com. They are great shoes!
heh i know it was supposed to be funny but heres my real reason for buying new balance. nike sucks. i don’t really like seeing tons of nike advertisements. and hearing that X athlete is being paid millions to whore their shoes just pisses me off further. add the fact that many of these shoes end up styled like they were supposed to be worn by space alien attention whores and well, i’ll pick the simple and effective new balance shoes instead.
It’s true. I am white and I own New Balance. But to be fair, I have feet problems and they are the only ones that I can walk in.
love em
http://www.Shop-Luscious.com
Your all a bunch of sad bastards!
There’s a grammatical error in line 10 of this article: “it’s” should be “its”.
I can’t help but call it out – I’m just too white.
i get them because there the quickest and easiest way out of a shoe store. I could choose something else, but that could take a half an hour. Time i could use for writing something.
I like NB sneakers because their logo reminds me of the Zips I always wanted as a kid. 🙂
I haven’t gone through ALL the comments yet, but so far nobody has mentioned this white person’s favorite thing about New Balance shoes: They’re made by union labor. I loves me that union labor!
Power to the people. Off the pigs.
I own two pair and I’m planning on buying another one!
My ex had about 50 pairs of NB and he was only half white. I’m all white and I only have 1…indeed I am an inferior white person.
Oh my god. This is so good. I seriously bought my first pair of shoes to run in without having been recommended any, I bought New Balance. I raved about them (so comfy etc) and when I went back to buy the same pair when those had kind of died, the model I liked weren’t being made anymore. So, i shopped around and didn’t like any of the other NB so guess what I bought. Asics!! God that made me laugh. And yes, secretly, when I have been running regularly, I do feel better than other folk who don’t.
Thanks for the laugh!
crank that souljah boy
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i didn’t read all the comments either, but i imagine white people also love that you can get vegan new balance. well, i love that. thanks for helping me up my status as a white person with all your great tips.
It is simple, they come in various widths.
What about the fact that in the 90s nearly every black person was rocking the NB? I worked at an ‘urban’ shoestore, and I saw that people started going crazy for the 996s. then they released the 574s, all blue leather, and black girls and guys HAD to have’em. Of course then came all the crazy colors and more suede colors…and then the fad passed after a few yrs.
But yah, then AND now every frat boy would love to play b’ball in some gray NB running shoes, and eventually cry about turning an ankle. The NB 1300s are the best shoes known to man (but I’m not a dumbass so I don’t play b’ball in running shoes), then Jordan XI, then Airmax 95s – and whadyya know….they are both NIKE, sorta.).
I would also say on the whole, that black guys probably have more shoes than white guys…and at one point NB was a staple piece of wardrobe.
As a person (white not necessarily being a factor) who speaks and writes English, can I respectfully suggest that you correct your incorrect usage of the possessive “it’s”? “Its imminent doom” is the proper grammar (i.e. your second sentence), not “it is imminent doom,” which is how the sentence would read if you unraveled the incorrect contraction (see White People With Too Much Time On Their Hands, White People With a Bug Up Their Butt, It’s Not the Color, It’s the Stupidity, etc.).
Damn. I thought I was different. I too own a pair of New Balance.
my friend it seems to me that you are very much lame
WOW i use to my a manager at a Journeys shoe store, and i must say this is true…..i worked in a very urban mall and journeys has like skate shoes and stuff so nobody really came in there( compared to foot locker!!!!) but when white people came in , they were like “OH MY GOSH…. LOOK AT ALL THESE SHOES…I FREAKIN LOVE NEW BALANCES!” along with birkenstocks, clarks, crocks, flip flops……this is sooooo funny!!!!
I am white and own 3 pair of NBs (basketball, running, and court shoes), but not because they’re made in the USA – although I find that appealing. NB shoes are better designed for people who have over-pronation, where the toes of the foot point outward and are out of alignment with the direction of the stride. This causes excessive wear on the outside heel and outer ball of the foot. NB soles have two composite materials, a softer sole for the inner arch part and a more durable material for the outer edge and heel. Pick up a pair and turn them over to see what I mean, especially the basketball shoes. My Nikes and Reeboks always had a worn outer heel, but since I switched to NB I no longer have that problem. Consumer Reports had a good article on athletic shoes a few years ago, I’d recommend it to anyone looking for a particular style of shoe to meet their physical profile. Hmm, maybe there should be a post that white people always subscribe to Consumer Reports?
I have the duck foot problem, wide feet, which New Balance has good shoes for. Also they’re local! 😀
These are quite possibly the ugliest shoes in the universe. At best they’re second to Birkenstocks in the couldn’t-care-less-about-my-appearance sweepstakes.
So when A Tribe Called Quest raps about wearing NB sneakers, does that mean they’re actually white? Or do only white people like ATCQ? I mean, I always thought Phife Dawg was the blacker of the two (Q-Tip is definitely a white guy in disguise).
Pete, as a white guy I am singing the quest song n my head right now! And I am pretty sure it was Phife-Footer who rung the lyric about sporting New Balance sneakers. And as a member of the Zulu Nation, he is most definitely (politically) black. So then was he pandering to an all-white audience? I know my first concert in high school was ATCQ “Low End Theory” concert…
i wonder if tim works for nb
I have NB mainly because I have bad feet! (yes I’m white) Maybe the NB phenomenon is because white people have bad feet…. just a thought.
I’m white and I wear NB but not for the reason of the sweatshops. I wear them because I remember years ago hearing that Nike specifically advertised to black people only. So thats when I decided I wouldn’t be caught dead in a pair of Nike’s!
Damn, I’ve been wearing New Balance for years. Far before I even knew this site existed. It wasn’t for any of the reasons listed, but still! I really wear them because they fit my wide feet.
Wow…you wouldn’t be caught dead in some shoes that were being advertised to black people? So you were outraged because Nike wanted to step up and FINALLY market to the black consumer population? Wow…that is a shame. Oh well, I’m sure they do just fine w/out your business.
New Balance are not exclusively Made in the USA, btw.
I wear them because they are more comfortable than other shoes I have worn.
True runners run barefoot! Next best is vibram fivefingers FTW.
I wear them because that’s what white people like and I wanna be cool like other white people. In fact, I so seriously want to be cool, I have 23 pair…
I wear them because they are really cheap, as am I, and they come in 4eeee as do my feet. In olden days the most depressing thing I could do was buy shoes. Now it doesn’t even register on the depressometer. But that might be the luck o’ the prozac.
As a White person who lives in “Da hood” (Southside Jamaica Queens) I must say Nike reigns supreme around these parts. But, there one NB that does get some representin’ in da hood, which is the 574 (AKA ‘Da Ghetto Balance!).
I do see many blacks rockin’ ghetto balances, and all the small sneakers stores around here carry them in variety of colors. Some of the shops do carry 992’s and Zips, but it’s a rare siting seeing a brotha rockin’ them.
I recently went to a weathly community along the North Shore of the island and my observations were that half the community was rockin’ NB, primarily the 992’s. So, for people who don’t think there’s any validity in this blog, well, your wrong.
As for myself, I LOVE NB. Right now, faves are the Zips. Not popular with getting street cred, but a fine looking shoe indeed, and it’s American built. Oh, I did purchase a pair of 574’s so I can blend in with the locals alittle more. 😉
Wow- I didn’t know any of that. They just fit my feet.
So I was in a shoe store and on one foot was a Nike and on the other a New Balance… The Nike was a little bit cuter (dark grey and hot pink!) and a little bit more supportive of the arches, but then I started thinking about the tiny little baby hands that made all those adorable little stitches all around that EVIL swoosh. So I asked the sales lady if New Balances were even made in America anymore and she said no. They come from all over. They haven’t been domestic for years. My new Nikes are hot.
I find it cruel that a website that demonstrates that it knows that white people like to correct writing errors would include a sentence that reads:
If it’s popular, the chances are that the clock is ticking down to it’s imminent doom.
Because that second “it’s” should be “its.”
And then, in over a thousand comments, nobody has pointed it out–even though one person echoed the judgment that white people like to correct grammar (and that person spelled it “grammer”). Are there no other self-hating mostly-white people on this website who conform to the stereotype being lampooned?
Don’t you people know that I have work to do? Do you imagine that I have nothing better to do than to point out that a possessive pronoun is being presented as a contraction, on a website that I shouldn’t even be reading?
I couldn’t care less if Nike are using 6 year old pregrant Indonesian mothers of two to make my cheap sneakers. I buy New Balance because they are one of the few shoes to offer extra wide shoes for my waterski like hoofs.
Plus, you can get mega cools styles in Japan (BOOMSHAKA!! Did I just blow your puny Earth Mind with my multiple combo White Guy Likes right there?! Admit it, I had you buffetted up in the air like a whirlwind before bringing you back down just in time for the painy season.)
Your saleswoman was wrong, actually. My cousins own New Balance (no, I’m not getting rich off it… we’re talking third cousins I’ve only met thrice) and they produce all their sneakers in the US. I think some of the -materials- now come from abroad.
I actually don’t own a pair, oddly… maybe I should get on that shit.
I just bought a pair of New Balance (about the only thing wide enough)
and mine say made in China….
Obviously, yes.
My hubby and I love new balance and also buy them for our two year old son. The main reason we love new balance is because most black people don’t wear them! Plus they are one of the few brands that make shoes to fit my hubby’s 4E width foot! And they are super comfy and last.
Actually, “it’s” is a conjunction of “it is”, so the sentence is correct. “Its” is the possessive pronoun.
oh man! I prefer Asics for my running shoes. Did I just forfeit my “white” status?
you forgot to mention that new balances usually cost about half what nike shoes cost.
These types of shoes have become so ubiquitous that no one remarks anymore on just how ugly they are. I hate them and will only wear them to the gym, as it should be.
i’m afraid you have..
white people wear new balance or asics or the brown shoes you cant tie. that aint no lie. so when your walkin down the street take a look at their feet. you will soon see that they are everywhere but you wont care like me. cuz my feet will be bare before i try a pair..of white people shoes that can be worn by some jews. unless they are like me and refuse to wear that gear on their feet. so id like you to share with me if you ever meet.. a white person with brand new J’s on their feet. i will continue my rhyme as soon as some one gives me a beat. or let my main man finish cuz we call him mencrezey.
Another white person reports: My good friend is unabashedly unhip. He might be kinda republican but hides it around me. He owns two pairs of New Balance runners that he wears with jeans and a Ralph Lauren polo to his office job, like a uniform. He is not a runner. These shoes see a lot of short pile nylon flooring.
You’re a retard if you were NB, crocs or any other lame shoe. furthermore, what kind of commie liberal are you if you look like a republicn racist douchebag in your Ugg croc NBs?
White people also love NB 991 because the shoes are expensive and other white people know this.
See #99
Wow, I didn’t know that they were made in the USA. I feel kind of stupid. Golf clap for me anyway! I buy them because they have a high arch and large toe area. My toes like wiggle room.
Not all New Balance shoes are made in the US. Most, but not all.
I buy them for one main reason. They make athletic shoes in my size, which is a EEE width. If you have a wide foot like mine, thereis no way in hell you’re going to get into a Nike, Reebok, or Asics.
One size does NOT fit all.
Take those stupid ass shoes of you fucking morron go to http://www.revoint.com for some cool shit.
Only those who can spell “moron” should be qualified to use the word to describe others. So who’s the fucking moron??? Hmmmm…..
32 year old white male.
I hate New Balance Shoes. I wear Nike, Adidas and Converse.
Did u all know that NB shoes were for a long time the inevitable gear for football(soccer) hooligans??
That´s for what whitle people like..hahahaha
Talk about ultra-whiteness: Neonazis wear them because of the “N” insignia. On the other hand, most people I knew growing up, predominantly Jewish, wore them, as far as I know, without these intentions.
addidas all the freaking way. The way I see it, I am giving a poor child in asia a job by purchasing these products. lol lol
I am an asian too. BTW white people that run not only think that they are better than white people that don’t run, but all people that don’t run.
I’m white, grew up in a small suburban white town, and I do not know anyone who likes or wears New Balance. Those are only for old people. I’ve never seen *anyone* (including white people) under 45 wear them.
And who says Uggs aren’t cool anymore?
Actually, I wear brooks shoes and am training for my fifth marathon. And yes, I do think I’m better you…. especially if you are wearing new balance sneakers and lululemon yoga pants to run errands… but never to actually work out.
Everyone except sorority girls, that’s who. Go to a college campus, particularly one that doesn’t attract the wrong kind of white people (Ivy League, New Ivy League in the south, Stanford or Berkeley on the West Coast, etc.) and ask a male or non-sorority female what they think of Uggs. Sorority girls persevere and continue to wear them, but only because they’re “super comfortable” and “cozy,” though they tend to get hostile when reminded that these are the very same defenses utilized for the scorned “Crocs” style of footwear.
I am a 28 year old white male and I too have noticed this phenomenon. When I was a kid all my friends wore reebok, british knights, la gear or the holy grail nike. But as I moved on to college, I noticed increasing numbers of my friends sporting newby low-tops. I am now a proud owner of a pair I have had for a few years and love them and everyone I know also has a pair. Newby’s rule!
Yes, you may be better than me at running long distances, but the thing you don’t realize is that I am a ninja in training. You can run 26.2 miles, but can you run up walls? You can push yourself out the door on the road every morning, but can you throw shurikens at moving targets? How about effectively use a kitana or staff?
And so many of the other listings were actually sort of funny.
I wear New Balance because… they actually fit. Sorry Nike, my feet are more than 2 inches wide. I’ve been buying them for years even though I thought they were sweat shop merchandise. Ideals are one thing, but bare feet? I don’t think so.
I’m stuck on New Balance. for some reason they are the only brand of shoes that doesn’t have a “wearing in” period till they are comfortable enough to wear on a 12 hour shift standing on cement floors. I never saw myself spending 50+ bucks on a pair of sneakers till I met New Balance.
God, New Balance shoes are some of the ugliest footwear ever created. Where I live, only poor people wear New Balance, always second hand, and very ugly.
Wow, what an observation! Those poor people and their second hand, ugly New Balance shoes. Just a quick question: did the wealthy people (such as yourself I’m assuming) buy these first and THEN pass them along to the poor?
Actually, it’s because all Nike et al. designs vie to be the one shiny, overdesigned pair of sneakers ghetto kids own.
New Balance are comfortable and unassuming.
I don’t know if this disproves your theory but I’m black and in DC where I live we all wear New Balances. Maybe its because of our close proximity to white people and their influences on us but we love the NBs. Ive been wearing NBs since the mid 80s as a teen. They are so popular here we don’t even call them New Balances we just call out the numbers and they’re automatically recognized (ex. I just came from the store with a fresh pair of 992’s or 1300’s or 2001’s). I personally buy a pair of 992’s and 1300’s every spring , they look so good with a white polo Tee and a crisp pair of jeans/cargo shorts whatever. I hope this does’nt throw your theory off on white peoples taste in sneakers, it maybe just a fluke caused by one culture rubbing off on the other.
PS I actually run in mine once they get too old to sport, ( next to Asics Tigers) they’re great running shoes.
And Australians
I wear which ever pair matches best with the dog I’m walking to yoga at the time. Namaste Bitches!
i hate NB sneakers. then again, i’m not white. why am i commenting on this again? shut up, rachelle.
I have 2 pair! God I’m pale. We Irish don’t tan well. Our freckles just connect.
very true. well said.
New Balance shoes suck! Asics all the way!!!
Nikes never seem to fit as well as New Balances for some reason. I guess their shoes are thinner?
that’s Right homie
I have owned NBs for years. I buy them for three reasons.
1.) I have Fred Flintstone feet. No other shoes fit.
2.) NBs are cheap and have a good variety.
3.) It’s impossible to find Nike shoes that don’t make you look like a clown.
New Balance for only one reason: They come in widths. I wear a 10-1/2 EE.
99% of mass-produced shoes today are D-width and just too narrow for my feet.
i dare to say that rainbow sandals are the most loved footwear of white people. i don’t know if this is all white people or just the subset of southern white people, but i live in the south and do not know a single white person that doesn’t own 2 pairs of rainbows (at the minimum). most have upwards of 4 pairs.
Wow, I have two pair of those shoes from a sale several years ago and I didn’t even know the backstory. How thrilling to discover even my footwear is politically correct. I guess being white makes me instinctively do the white thing.
Uggs, Birkenstocks, Earth Shoes, and most recently Crocs.
Well, yeah, I’m white and I wear New Balance shoes every day. I’ve worn “all” the others, but I wear New Balance 608 (cross trainers????) now.
It’s not some fad, not a child labor thing, not an anti-anything reason.
Do you know why I wear New Balance 608’s? Because they freakin’ FIT!!! And they last for a very long time. Nike’s and Reebok’s won’t make it a year, they start coming apart after a few months. They are garbage. Now that Converse disappeared and then came back with outrageous prices instead of being the economy shoe, New Balance is the only way to go for athletic shoes. Sorry dude, Asics suck too.
-Thomas (an iPod-less, non-Sushi eating, non-wine drinking white guy who doesn’t know what Uggs, Birkenstocks, or Earth Shoes are…. and thinks Crocs are retarded)
When I was a freshman at Florida A&M University a woman stopped me as I was leaving the school’s post office. She asked if I were from Washington, DC.
I said, “Yes, how did you know?” She told me that Washingtonians were the only people who thought New Balance were still in style.
I have owned at least one pair of New Balance for about 20 years now. I don’t know many people from DC who don’t own a pair. I never ride the subway or bus without seeing several pair of New Balance.
So, lets say that white people and DC Blacks love New Balance running shoes.
Catcher in the Rye should be a whole section, white people LOVE catcher in the rye
That’s awesome. I’m actually wearing a pair of New Balance and my girlfriend has one as well. Keep up the good work.
I’d write more but I need to grab some sushi, listen to some indie music, and think about how much I like soccer without actually watching or playing any. That’ll be dope.
Gee, I must not be as white as I thought. Probably about fifteen years ago I had a pair of New Balance shoes. The damn things completely fell apart within three months. Bring on the kids who can make shoes right! Fila kidz!
New Balance shoes are pretty hideous, I don’t care where they’re made or how many hip altruistic people wear them.
Huh, I didn’t know all that stuff about New Balance. I just refuse to wear any other sneakers because these have great traction, great design, are very comfortable, and last forever. I currently have three pairs of $50 NB shoes, two of which have lasted me over two years without even looking 6-months old.
And Thomas… you are a MORON. Holy crap dude, shutup, you commented on every single one of these and nobody gives a crap. Seriously, it’s a joke, and by taking it seriously you’re a joke. You’ve proven yourself to be an idiot to thousands of people with these comments. You just angrily read through 100 things you disagree with.
You are CORRECT in your call, of course – however, I personally believe that it’s an AMERICAN thing, in general, but Blacks & Asians are too fashion-conscience to wear the dreadful styles. Now, the real reason that AMERICAN (whites) wear NB, is that we are all terribly obese and these shoes come in D DD E EE and EEE – for fatty’s!
Thomas, honestly, this website is supposed to be a joke. I believe since you disagree with most of the things Christian is writing about, you must be one of the “wrong kinds of white people” he references regularly. Maybe you should go out and find something that makes you happy, since you are obviously being made very aggrivated by this site and making everyone else aggrivated by reading your shit comments.
By the way, this site is hilarious. I’m looking forward to checking out the book.
I think your first responder h it it on the head…not everyone is a D, or medium width…which is the width in which about 97% of all shoes come in (casual, dress, sporty, sneakers, heals, etc., etc.,). I’m not morbidly obese or anything, but I have been blessed with very wide feet. The only reason I own, and have for many years, New Balance shoes– is because they actually fit. That is an important factor when you run 3 or 4 miles. That’s the only reason…trust me, it’s not because they look cool.
The Winthrop University Men’s Basketball team has won the Big South Conference Championship and beat Notre Dame in the NCAA playoffs two years ago while wearing New Balance shoes. I’m sure those white people who love to make assists also contributed to these victories.
red and orange ones
New Balance shoes are really good for chasing down free-range chickens and going to pick-your-own vegetable farms (which really should be a topic here).
Does it count if I got my New Balance shoes at Goodwill for $5.00 and they are the wrong size?
too expensive. I’m only half Jew but it’s the half that counts money.
LOVE my NewBalance. I suffered from shin splints until I bought them. I would have never spent so much on sneakers, but I am now free from foot pain from wearing cheap sneakers, so it’s worth it. And I do run marathons-I have 3 boys, and they’re getting into more activities (more running and juggling for me!)
my boyfriend whom I met while working in an urban area, leave it up to me, to date the whitest guy at work, got so much flack for having new balances. He loved them, he finally broke down and got a pair of Jordans for 150 bucks..
I’m about 1/3 native, 2/3 white. I love New Balance because they are the only running shoes that come wide enough to accommodate my orthodontics.
Dan Bergen,
You wear shoes on your dental appliances?
i’m new to the site, i’m jewish I assume that counts. I like saucony shoes, every since i ran track in high school. Does this contradict your theory?
I hate to sound racist, but I seriously think I haven’t met a white person who DOESN’T have New Balance shoes. Astonishing, really.
I’m white, and I don’t own a pair of New Balance among the forty-plus pairs of sneakers that I own. I do, however, have a pair of Starburys that are New Balance knock-offs. Make of that what you will.
I own 5 pairs, but the NB headquarters are literally around the corner from my apartment. It is local for me.
Oh. Yes.
I sport NB’s and wear retro black medallions to show how i’m down with old-school hip-hop. All of my black friend thinks i’m so cool.
No he’s not a Jew. But he does wear New Balances. Seriously.
I buy NB just cause they’re cute and I’ve found them to be cheaper than Nike and such. Also- mine are made in China, just double checked.
I’m white and have never owned new balances. I prefer Sauconys.
Hey, cool! I have New Balance shoes because my doctor told me that I was less likely to break any more of my ankles if I had shoes with roll bars. No ankle breakage so far, and I’m in tune with what white people like. Maybe I better go buy another pair.
i have a pair of new balance shoes for running in and nothing else. besides that, i would never wear them.
ive never worn a pair of new balance shoes.. im either wearing flipflops or converse…
For running, nothing beats New Balance imo. Their shoes come in various widths for better fitting and they usually take years of virtually anything I’ve thrown at them to finally require replacement. I couldn’t care less about x product being made in y country, but Nikes fall apart on my feet within months.
Only the finest Carhartt steel toes for my honkey ass. I’ve noticed that lots and lots of white guys wear the New Balance, though.
i like my nb shoes because they’re cheaper to buy than those hi-tech running shoes and their style sit between real running shoes and casual day work shoes; they also last much longer compared with other brands. their oversize-ness make me feel less over developed. more people white and non-white should wear them 🙂
I think white people wear New Balances because the 992 (I think that’s what they’re on, I switched to Aasics) is one of the few decent looking shoes. It’s not a fashion show. It’s simply a running shoe that doesn’t look like some form of urban day-glo artwork. They’re also pretty good running shoes, for marathon training of course.
this is hilarious — we blogged about buying a new pair of New Balances… hehe
http://www.paunchiness.com — check out “shoes as motivation”
Actually, New Balance is now competing with Nike and the others by offering garish shoes made in China.
yes some are made in china, but all of the good ones are made in the US. The reason that more are not made in the US is because of the EPA not allowing certain glueing processes to be performed in the US. Trust me when I say we would like to be able to make more in the US.
I have some of the US shoes listed on our site at http://www.nbannapolis.com
We buy them because they are made in the US – the ones we buy anyway.
the funniest part about this is all the white people trying to defend new balance shoes in these posts
I don’t have a pair of New Balance at the moment but my dad’s last two pairs were 🙂
Plus aren’t they usually cheaper than Nikes?
I love my NB 992’s — it’s like they were made just for my feet. I recently stood in line for 3 hours waiting to get into a Barack Obama rally, then stood for 3 hours more inside the rally, but my feet felt great. Thank you, New Balance.
I actually just googled this after buying a pair US-made NB’s because I knew it had to be one here.. Few things are more quintessentially white than New Balance shoes.
Wow. I have never felt so “with it”.
I have worn New Balance for about 4 years and had no idea of their status until coming across this blog today.
I just hope no one notices, because I am happy to be considered totally unfashionable.
Has anybody got some advice for me as to how to respond should I be accused of being like the rest of “them”.
My first New Balance shoes were purchased in 1998 and they were the 990’s. They were made in the U.S. and they did last about 3 years until it fell apart. They were very comfy and they were the most comfortable pair of shoe I owned. My next pair was the 991 which was pictured on this site and they’re also made in the U.S. and they only last for about 2 months. After the shoe broke down, they were friggin’ unwearable. Then I bought the made in U.S. New Balance 852 and I had to return it because they were uncomfortable and I bought the made in U.S. New Balance 1700 and returned it because they were uncomfortable. It doesn’t matter where the New Balance shoes are made U.S. or China. They’re all the same.
By the way, saying White people are the only people who like New Balance is so 15 years ago because 15 years ago or more the only people I see wearing New Balances are White people. Now, I rarely see White people wearing New Balances! These days White people like brands like Adidas, Nike, Asics, Saucony and or some crazy unknown brand like Newton which I’ve never seen a non-White person wear.
HahahaHA! this one is ESPECIALLY funny to me. My boyfriend is black and we make fun of him all the time for wearing New Balances. It’s pretty much the only kind of shoes he buys. LMAO! I can’t wait to tell him what I found on here. He won’t care, he’ll just laugh about it and that’s why I love him so much. Because he does HIM. Not what people thinks he should be.
Ha ha ha. I own a pair of New Balance shoes. They were the cheapest shoes in the store. I just thought I was getting a bargain, not expressing my whiteness.
I have never owned a pair of New Balance shoes. I still prefer Nike or Adidas.
thanks for this info…I added one a few weeks ago b/c I bought an uber cute pair but they were made in China. Call me the wrong kind of white person, but I don’t really care where my stuff is made. ha ha.
You forgot to mention that college-going offspring of White People have also fully embraced Saucony jogging/skate shoes. The average offspring will have roughly 4 differnt colored pairs, but never white.
My mother’s husband (a very white way of saying I was born out of wedlock) works for New Balance. He owns over 25 pairs of sneakers. He doesn’t jog, but, he does wear his sneakers with mid-calf length blue dress socks and shorts, topped off by a tucked in t-shirt with a belt. He is the whitest link.
yay i feel white i own new balances and i love them and i jog i feel awesome white people will love me
totally white, hate New Balance
LMAO Saucony
http://andthisismyamerica.com/2008/11/14/this-one-is-for-the-fellas-how-to-take-advantage-of-a-weekend-when-your-girlfriendwife-is-away/
These pirates are bad ass!!!!
http://andthisismyamerica.com/2008/11/18/determination-of-a-pirate-how-a-band-of-somali-pirates-hijacked-a-supertanker/
We own a running store. Asics shoes represent more than 60% of the sales. They come in widths up to 6E. We regularly see people switch from New Balance to Asics. I also like Mizuno. And for something different, ran the Boston Marathon in a pair of Spira racing flats. PS Christian worship a living Jesus – one of the main things on his resume is “rising from the dead!”
You know, I’m flabbergasted at all the shit I’m supposed to like, being white an all. I should have come to this website years ago. It would have made my life so much easier.
I’m now going to get rid of my Brooks sneakers and get New Balance.
And here I thought all white people liked Converse Chuck Taylors and Doc Martens…
In the words of London Tipton: Yay, Me!
xhDgZJ tgfjstrndktk, [url=http://uuoockwbmcvt.com/]uuoockwbmcvt[/url], [link=http://yckevoqybmtq.com/]yckevoqybmtq[/link], http://wrcvlhyddzvt.com/
i actually hate new balance because they manage to look horrible with every artical of clothing i own. i wear chucks because they’re cheap and i can get them in colors to match pretty much anything.
this guy doesn’t like new balance, cuz they ain’t hired a high-profile negroe ball player to endorse they shit.
negroes all dig on nike & adidas, cuz michael jordan wear dem too!
Wow. Did you finish High School? See Grammar.
every WP loves NBs—it’s part of the uniform. In the summer though all WPs need a pair of Rainbow flops (note: it’s cool to call flipflops “flops”).
yea, i feel tha yungin “b” on that D.C thing cause i own a pair of 992 all grey of course and some 990, its not a just a white person thing. People in D.C Maryland and Virginia (DMV) love New Balances
I don’t care about the way they look. They’re running shoes. I care about how they perform.
I… own a pair of New Balance shoes. And Asics. Which I suppose makes me a truant.
I wear New Balance shoes pretty much exclusively, but not for reasons that have anything to do with politics or style. I wear NB’s because I have freak feet and they’re the only shoes that fit me.
Seriously. My feet are ridiculously wide and you could fit a small rodent under my arches. I used to think that ski boots weren’t even supposed to be comfortable because every time I’d put on a pair they’d cut off the circulation and my feet would be numb within about 10 minutes’ time.
Anybody else have this problem? God bless NB…
(Fear not; as a strict secularist I meant “god bless” purely as a colloquial expression. No wait, I was being “ironic”…)
You also have to relate the new Balance longevity fad to the white people who like hip hop forum as well. We(WP) know we can rock(that means “to wear something trendy”) chucks, and the shell toe’s ala Run DMC to really let others know we are down. On occasion, we can pull of some Nike running shoes, but never the patent leather Jordan’s or Nike Cortez, both reserved for non WP. However, the New Balance still have street cred from both the WP punk scene and the hip hop scene, so you can mesh well on any corner if shit gets crazy. Usually the all grays or the dark blue with gray lettering, plus those two colors go with your hip hop jeans or your Abercrombie khakis! Win-Win situation, Go NB!!!
Oh NO, it is a plot!!! Inspired by someone close to me I decided to take up running. And since I haven’t had a pair of runner shoes in years I went to get a pair. The shoe seller recommended a couple of different ones. And I ended up with this brand! And I DO love them!
And it is not until I read this that I get the connection. My inspiration? He is black. The sales man? Black too… All they wanted was to trick me into being white!
What a plot… 😉
my parents bronzed my first pair of baby NBs
satire must not be in your dictionary
White People wear NBs…but Really White People wouldn’t be caught dead w/o their Stan Smiths.
“walking and being seen in retro-sneakers.”
haha that’s my fave sport, def!
but i am all about the nikes.
I, on the other hand, do NOT own a pair of New Balance shoes, NOR would I ever wear them in public. (Birkenstocks, Earth Shoes, Uggs, and Crocs included)
um, i’m pretty sure this guy was joking…
what are stan smiths?
Ha, that’s funny. I never knew the 574’s were referred to as Da Ghetto Balance… i’m from queens (astoria) and i’m white and i think i probably have 6 pairs of the 574s. they’re simple – i like that. i can’t get into those crazy color sneakers that are so popular now – – not knocking those who wear them though.
Nike sucks
You yacht…. that’s the whitest thing i’ve ever heard someone say…. who yachts?
Duh – that’s not the point – get a sense of humor
Taking this literally is ignorant and Stupid
guarenteed to help you outrun the NYPD 5 times faster than Nike!
Don’t just collect welfare – tell the world “I like living on your tax dollars” Buy New Balance
haha – scott you’re a funny man
Go away
Mullet Lesbians wore doc martens in 93′
Aww New Balance shoes are actually pretty good. I was a cross country runner in middle school and high school, and wore only New Balance during those years. However, I guess I was justified in my usage of them, since I actually ran in them. I consider it gauche to wear shoes meant for athletics on an everyday basis – and also impractical, since you wear your shoes out faster.
It’s been a few years since I’ve owned a pair of NB shoes though. Now I have a pair of Asics that I run in, and when I want to wear retro sneakers I go with either Converse or Nike Dunks.
i love my newbalances! they dont cost as much as the nig shoes ( jordans and w/e nigs are wearing these days) and its hard to find other brand shoes that are wide enough for my feets!! fo real i gotta get like a quadrouple wide in nikes and then it just looks stupid! but its all cuz i got a quadruiple wide weener !!
… word to that.
Though, I did like my Mizunos better than my Asics.
—–dick shoe—–shoe horn——
that’s….weird….
hey and also, you’re a fool-racist
I have a pair of New Balance 473s. I love them this is the second pair I have had. Just alike both were the gray black colors…I run all the time..Mainly on treadmill but used to run outside. I wear the NBs all the time but not for running anymore. I have a pair of Asics Trail shoes and they are better for just running on the tread..And they are lighter..Like them both and they look good just wearing them out on the town. Saw a guy I knew in Wal Mart today and he was wearing those clog shoes for men..Didn;t say anything but those things look really lame or gay or both couldn’t decide but not for me!
I only wear tennis shoes when I exercise.. I wear New Balances. Because they’re comfortable.
The people I work with who wear them wear them because they’re comfortable for standing for long periods of time. Good arch support, come in wider sizes.
Sorry to throw some facts in, but, you know.
Heh. My one serviceable pair of non-dressy shoes is New Balance 621. However, I did not buy them for any of the politically-correct reasons mentioned. I bought them because they were plain and boring looking. They do not look like little spaceships of my feet, and they do not look like a basketball star would wear them. They are simple shoes with some athletic support.
Recently I was in the company of a guy who was obsessed with shoes, tennis/athletic shoes in particular, and what they told him of their owner. On and on he went, listing off shoes, proclaiming some to be cool, some not, ridiculing others and their owners, as if any of this meant anything. I was hoping that my shoes would be disagreeable to this guy but he claimed that they were acceptable, much to my annoyance.
Good god, then he started up about baseball-style hats…
I wish people would stop taking this website as seriously as they are. It’s funny. That’s it. Take it for what it is. Jeez.
I jog and work out, but I don’t berate anyone who does not. However, I do work with a couple of workout snobs who constantly comment about their workout schedule and have a comment about ANY food that ANYONE eats.
Really annoying.
It is what it is!!!
New Balance shoes are made without child labor? I seriously had no idea, they’re just very comfortable. I too only use them to run in though, or use an old pair when I’m doing something messy (gardening, outdoor painting).
I have a few suggestions for your list that you might already have heard before but here it is anyway:
You probably get this a lot, but I think you should add Converse shoes as well besides just New Balance. They aren’t for running, but I think the more modern typical white person wears these casual walking shoes due to there classic style and the fact that you can buy them in a variety of colors to match a wide variety of outfits. Throughout high school and college I noticed many white people wearing them due to their casual, yet fashion forward look. They portray rock star/ skateboard hippy type/ or even can be punk depending on the color of the converse, but they are most notable associated with what white people like. Black people have their timberlands for casual shoe, white people have converse, which, as we know is way cool and totally white.
Another thing that white people love is sunglasses, specifically those 80’s style Blues brother types, and you know the ones I am talking about, or ones that are beyond huge for your face, like Mary Kate and Ashley Oslen types.
They wear them everywhere! I see white people even
wearing sunglasses at night, mainly as an accessory to the hippy chic persona that they are going for. Also wearing trendy glasses that give them the look of sophistication/ eclecticism, kind of like the ones you happen to wear, which are very white.
Another thing that should be added is Coldplay, all white people love Coldplay or secretly love Coldplay because they aren’t huge enough to be completely pop star, which would make white people turn off from them since white people hate liking things that are too popular and trendy, like Britney Spears.
Oh, you should also add Urban Outfitters for shopping places that white people like, all white people love to shop at that store due to it’s fashion forward looks and anti-business approach. The fact that a t-shirt there can cost up to 50 dollars is beyond me, but for some reasons white people can’t get enough of it and will pay the price. With the stores clothing having peace signs and rally statements on it and bob marley pics everywhere you can’t resist such a hip and outspoken store.
Lastly, hating Starbucks is the new white thing. Only middle-aged white people go there now. Starbucks is too cliche for the young hip white guy. They will make up some excuse by saying that the coffee sucks or that Starbucks is the devil (same for Walmart). Again, this has to do with hating anything popular, just like the Britney Spears example that I gave earlier. Starbucks has gotten too popular and therefore is no longer cool to go to. It is better to go to a small unknown cafe with a professional barrista. I guess this could go under the whole coffee thing as well.
Just a few suggestions, I will think of more and post later! Good luck with your blog and I think a new book is needed ASAP! Start thinking of more stuff white people like and get to it!! I love your list!
I HAVE to wear New Balance.. they are about the only brand that offers extra wide running shoes. Yeah, 10.5 EEEE.. that is pronounced by the shoe people in the store as: :Quad E Freddy Flintstone to go…”
I hate New Balance! But now I feel validated by accidentally being cool and “in” with my hommies. ( I hope talking in white-ized Ebonics isn’t on the list, that would also be a diss.)
converse needs to be added to this list… every white person has at least 1 pair
OMG, I totally didn’t even realize this until I read this. Last night I was taking a martial arts class and when I looked in the shoe cubbies near the door, it seemed like everyone (myself included) were wearing New Balances.
my husband has 2 pairs of the pictured new balances! funny. i own yellow nikes 🙂
Very funny blog…never realized this to be true of New Balance …I switched from Nike only because they fit my wide feet better…for running, of course!
guess I lose one here still have pretty good balance even though I am old.. had my ass kicked at Krav practice though… lost my balance a couple of times….
Im black and I never thought about it but I don’t have one black friend that owns a pair of these lol!
NO! I don’t own any Converse. (Now. That is.)
Sad to say I do own a couple pair of NB running shoes.
I have never owned NB until about 6 months ago, when I needed new shoes for a foot problem, and the saleslady talked me into the NB. ACK!
I never really wanted them….it was all her fault!!!
Funny, I own NB shoes because they were cheap and the only thing made in America. Can’t say I could care less whether children are working in sweatshops. Less intellectual competition for the USA, and we can use all the help we can get in that department given our screwed up education system.
I would buy Nike if they’d make any in a wide size that don’t look like nurse shoes. Till then I’m stuck with New Balance.
i have to agree with all of the white people on here, i mean im white but technically im african, i was born and raised in a very small unknow place known as Kenya where all people over there wear newbalance. dont matter how poor they is they still be rocking dey newbalences so all i gotta say is whaddup
i deff have to agree with william, i find these newbalance shoes amazing and always use them while i masterbait. i love to stand in the mirror butt naked and masterbait while i wear my nb 574’s. they help me cum faster so i have fallen in love with these shoes. my boyfriend doesnt really enjoy my low endurence (if you know what i mean (: ) but its ok because they are so cumfortable
While there may be some merit to this, the reason that I wear them it that they make them in a wide. Nike doesn’t and my toes get pinched and fall asleep.
Funny how Nike has become so popular with uneducated blacks…only a moron wold pay $175 for a pair of ugly-ass shoes in neon colors that cost $2 to make. Yes massa, I be takin’ it in the ass again!
Hell yeah…I wear asics
I used to date this white guy (I’m black), and when I started talking about how I wanted to get into shape, he couldn’t get me to a New Balance store fast enough. He was all, let’s take a ride, I have a surprise for you. I had never even heard of New Balance. He couldn’t stop talking about how wonderful they were. He even paid for them!
After we broke up I started wearing Asics. They’re cuter and fit better.
I agree! I wear 11 wide–in women’s! I wear New Balance shoes because they fit and are not horribly over-priced. (And, I’m not white!)
haha thats funny as hell. I’m a white guy and I used to have like 3 pairs of New Balances. Then i grew out of them and started wearing Sperry’s (which this author should know is def. the new craze in white footwear). Anyways, I go to school now and walk around campus alot and Sperry’s aren’t all that good for lots of walking so I asked my sister what kind of tennis shoes I should get, and her first suggestion was New Balances, and I was like “yeah, those shoes are the shit.”
Sperrys are worn by the wrong kind of white people. Hipsters would never be caught dead wearing them.
Anyone in to Rainbows where you live? I’m from the South, and everyone (male and female) owns two pairs of shoes there: brown rainbows for march-novemeber; gray new balances for december-february.
sperry’s are definitely in again all white people where them and they’re especially good for summers on nantucket/martha’s vineyard or in the hamptons.
is it bad that this makes me want to go out and buy a pair of New Balance shoes?
Merrell has to challenge for the top white shoe spot as well
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I wear New Balance because they make wide width shoes.
Try to find a Nike, Adidas, Asics, etc that makes anything other than a D width shoe.
me same.
New Balance fit well, and last a long time. Can’t wear Nike–too narrow.
Hhahaha….New Balance is a huge part of what I call the “DAD oufit,”
Consists of:
Plain T-Shirt
Khaki Shorts
High white socks
and of course New Balance shoes
Add sunglasses with the neckstrap on occasion. LOL!!
Don’t forget the baseball cap
I just got fitted for New Balance on my lunch break today!
don’t forget to tuck in too
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Not only that, I bet you show up one hour late, sell bags that don’t actually make weight, and…wait…I forget…you sell marijuana. I’ve already written too many words for your pea-brain.
I bet mom and dad are proud.
I like new balance cuz they’re rounded on the toe. I hate pointy running shoes! I do like pointy heels though! 🙂
Based on the number of people who claim they like NB because they’re wider, I would have to assume that it is a brand that mostly fat white people like. And not the runners like you claim.
I have an atheltic build, but I have a wide foot (EE). New Balances new zip 8511’s look pretty hot in black. 🙂
For the record, I’m 5’2, weigh 96 lbs, wear a size 5 1/2 shoe, and have run in New Balance for more than 15 years, as a competitive and recreational runner and in 12 marathons to date – because they fit my wide feet. Your logic is a bit flawed, I’m afraid.
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I agree 100%. I am not obese, I have wonderfully-made wide feet. NB actually fit wide feet. I am a female who has to purchase a Men’s 8 EEEE in order to find comfort in shoes. Thank you, New Balance for producing shoes in a comfortable width!
I walked into a Marhsalls (and later the adjacent Ross) the other day looking for New Balance shoes precisely because I assumed they were made in the USA. I wanted something comfortable for hiking in the hills. And I’ll be damned if EVERY single pair of New Balance shoes I encountered (about 10 or so) weren’t made in China! What happened, New Balance?
The Wikipedia entry for New Balance states that 70% of their shoes were made in America – back in 1994!! A lot sure changes in 14 years – especially with regards to China. We all saw that Olympic opening ceremony. I ended up buying a pair of Speedo running shoes (for only $15) and you can bet that they are the most comfortable athletic shoes I’ve ever bought. I can run or hike twice as much with half the effort and nearly forget I’m wearing them at all. Sadly, like everything else, they’re also made in China.
Ooh, I forgot to mention… the Speedo running shoes are precisely for that – running (or any kind of exercise really). I wear them only when working out, running, hiking. I do understand why people prefer New Balance for the look, though. I never wear sneakers unless I’m exercising – my daily footwear tends toward classic men’s footwear (leather). If I were the type of person who wore sneakers every day I’d prefer the look of New Balance to the Speedos, but for an actual workout Speedo is the better shoe.
I just purchased a pair of NB 881’s at Marshall’s for work (i’m a nurse) and they are American built. Most low end NB’s are imported (which Marshalls carries alot of). I scored the 881 for $25, orginally they were $90! You get alot of good deals at Marshalls.
New Balance is the only company that makes running shoes in narrow sizes that don’t slide off my delicate (puny) white feet. I’d wear them even if they were made by Chinese-enslaved Tibetan monks. I would just compensate by meditating an extra minute for every minute I spend jogging.
new balance shoes suck almost as bad as those bulky nikes
Hey Fred I think “white-ized” ebonics probably should be on the list as well as anal rententive spelling freaks! Did you spell hommies like that on purpose? Or, did you mean “mommies”? Don’t worry about your homeys or your homies or even your homeez’ cause you’ll always be cool to your Mommy!
I used to wear New Balance. They are all right. Have recently started running seriously (don’t laugh) and have discovered Asics. Which, BTW kick New Balance’s -ss!
I wear new balance, but its because they are the only shoes that fit my wide feet comfortably. And since I do a lot of walking at my job comfortablility is a huge factor.
New Balance are the quintessential white shoes. Any white guy between the ages of 16 and 35 has owned at least one pair of NB. They are the all purpose outdoor shoes
I ran in the 941’s for about 5 years and now prefer the 942’s. I usally wear my old one’s with my Navy Pea Coat that I’ve owned for 18 years.
Of course I only run 10 miles a week.
Years ago New Balance were made for a slightly narrow foot, and all models were actually made for jogging or running. That’s why I started wearing them. During the 80-90’s the majority of the running shoes you’ld see at a local run were NB. But it you went to any of the chain shoe stores at the mall you couldn’t find NB. Specialized running shops would carry a few models. There used to be a huge # of loyal customers that had to go to some effort to get NB.
At some point in time they changed the toe box to a wider fit, and the lower end models feel like a chunk of wood. I don’t bother with them anymore.
i hate white people
Nice call choosing the pic of the 991’s. Classic old man shoe. I wore a pair out back in college. Hell no I never ran in them! I needed a pair with more motion control.
I’m black, and I just got a pair of size 15 NB 645s from Amazon. So there.
I’m thinking about getting a pair of New Balance because I have a hard time finding shoes to fit my narrow feet. But I’m concerned about appearing even whiter. Will non-caucasians smirk at my shoes?
Where da white wimmin at?
I’d like to see a white person rock some Japanese New Balance MT 580.
Great site! A couple of suggestions: Birkenstocks and Learning to Play Guitar.
You’re one ignorant piece of shit.To say that you wish all blacks were imaginary maybe you should wish that your mother had aborted you when she had the chance.I know that there was a rusty coat hanger near by,but hell it’s not too late ,you can abort yourself Idiot.
A Mad White Man!!
Curved brim and not fitted
damn I wear new balance running shoes with jeans!
this gave me a huge reality check. I’m not white, I’m dropping the New Balance look.
shucks! I rock NB’s too…..and yep…you guessed it…..I’m blaaaaack….
New balance shoes aren’t just a trend..they are suggested by most foot specialists because they have a slightly bigger arch for people with foot problems.
so there you go!
there should be some distinction made between the 990 series and 2000 series (the expensive ones, in the $100-$200 range), the almost identical to the untrained eye but which sport a slightly larger ‘N’ and are made of cheaper materials (and possibly overseas, and typically accompany an ed hardy shirt or hat), and the ‘trail running’ series. It is only acceptable to wear the most expensive (the 990 series or 2000 series). white people will know the difference between the more expensive and less expensive versions, so be sure to wear the right ones.
I but them because tere one of the few than come in size 9.5 US
Please note: In Germany “New Balance” is almost exclusively worn by Neo-Nazis or – more often – their girlfriends. The reason being that if combined with pants all that comes to show from the logo is the “N” in “New Balance”, which, since it is put onto the shoes at a 45° angle, looks somewhat reminiscient of the SS-rune symbol as worn by Himmler’s (sic! Hitler was the other guy 😉 vicious elite suqad.
So if you are NOT white, better not wear ’em in Eastern Germany, unless you want to find out how good our public health system really is the hard way and get stomped by some baldhead idiots who find pleasure in killing two birds with one stone – beating up “Untermenschen” and getting their ugly-ass chick a nice souvenire…
so just in order to clarify, the “N” does not stand for “Nazi” but, since put at a 45° angle, is considered similar to the “Sturmstaffel”‘s (in short: SS) symbol, which in turn was derived of the ancient Germanic S rune. The same rune which the arm-movement of the infamous “Heil Hitler” (lifting and stretching your right arm – I’m sure you’ve seen it) was supposed to symbolize and also stands for “Sieg”, the German word for “victory” or “conquest”.
i just got my first pair of running shoes in 20 years and they are exactly the ones in the picture. it made me laugh. although not white, i can perhaps share some insight about the attraction white people may feel toward new balance, since i found myself going through a similar thought process before deciding on these shoes i thought may inspire jogging. the attraction is the ‘reasonable’ factor. it’s akin to joining the Y instead of Bally’s or buying a Subaru vs. an SUV. so many running shoes’ designs are bright and garish and neon and reflective and have a mattress, mattress pad, and box spring attached to the heels. white people may find the simple, retro, gets the job down without the bells and whistles image behind the grey new balance attractive. they are humble and effective without attracting to much attention to the cause of jogging. running shoes are ugly to begin with, but if one must jog, the grey shoes that work will do. just like the Y. Bally’s is considered garish and cheesy. i still haven’t jogged in them.
in my shoes. but i did belong to bally’s.
I’ve worn New Balance basketball and running shoes for over a decade, but only because they fit me better than any other shoe I’ve tried. All this time I never realized how phenomenally trendy I am!
Yes!
http://messedupparentingtips.wordpress.com/
So true.
Have you ever noticed how ugly all the shoes listed in this blog are?
For real, gross.
I prefer Nike’s, pretty much any brand of skateboarding shoes, or just plain old flip flops.
They never go out of style. 😉
you sure know alot about Nazis
wow! i bought a pair two days ago. yes the vintage ones, after i went to whole foods with my mom in her volvo station wagon. we bought organic pears and had lunch at boston market. im glad i stumbled upon this site; it has opened my eyes to how white i am
Does this mean I have to get rid of my New Balance shoes because I’m black? Sorry. Because I’m African-American?
No, I think it means that I have to go out and get a pair. I’m gonna miss my Adidas … sad white boy
I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!!! Can one million RICH WHITE PEOPLE send me one dollar apiece, puh-lease????
I don’t want money from any Asians, or Blacks or Hispanics. You guys NEED your money. I only want one dollar apiece from RICH WHITE PEOPLE, who only WASTE their money on things like New Balance shoes.
Waste it on me instead. Thanks so much! (First person who comments “You ARE a waste.” is a rotten egg. You thought it. I know you did. Stop lying. See? I knew it.)
http://thepighasacurlytail.wordpress.com/million-dollar-fund/
lol I played ball in new balances once.
“In Germany “New Balance” is almost exclusively worn by Neo-Nazis”
that’s not true… it actually was like that couple of years ago, but this trend kinda disappeared lately. i’m an anti-fascist and own 2 pairs of new balance trainers… and, yeah i’m a white guy 😉
NB are sweet except they generally come in wider sizes.
No way Chuckie. I’m Black and all I own are New Balance sneakers. Never ran over a mile in my life.
http://whatindyhell.wordpress.com/
White people certainly don’t like Carlos Mencia, and Abraham Lincoln calls him out on it…
http://lincolnsaysuncool.wordpress.com/2009/07/25/lincoln-says-uncool-carlos-mencia/
All I can say is that this shit is just fucking hilarious!
I thought New Balance was for people with wide feet.
Anyway, here’s Christian’s formula if anybody wants to try it out themselves:
1. Pick a recognizable “latest thing” (which means anything within the scope of Christian’s process of self-realization).
2. Say that “white people like it”
3. Think of an incredibly insecure, arrogant and narcissistic reason for white people to like it (doesn’t matter what the reason is, as long as it betrays superficiality)
4. Post to Website
5. As long as Christian is the first to make X “keen observation” (i.e. blanket generalization), Christian gets to be the one who can “laugh at himself.” Man, white people love laughing!
I saw [this](http://imgur.com/FYLJn.jpg) this weekend and immediately thought of this article. Black People Like New Balance Too!
Hilarious! I am white and played basketball this morning in my New Balance running shoes.
Someone’s a New Balance wearing, frisbee chucking hipster.
For real, for real (negro slang), I live in Baltimore, and every n@gga I know has a pair of New Balances. The 993’s is the sh@ts everybody got, I think. I don’t own a pair, cause my money been funny for, like, six months. The real reason I don’t own a pair, I guess, is that I kinda think they look like shoes that exotic-coffee drinkin’- dog kissin’ in the mouth- joggin’ three o’clock in the mornin’-yuppie white people would wear. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Except, maybe, the “kissing dogs in the mouth” thing. That’s disgusting. That’s entry level bestiality! Why don’t you rub his cock while you’re at it, you sick bastard! White folk were even going around saying that dogs’ mouths were cleaner than a humans. That’s buuul sh@t! And, even if it was true, that doesn’t make it acceptable to french your Chesapeake Bay lab. And I know it’s a f@ckin’ lab that you have, ’cause that’s white people’s favorite mutt. I hate f@ckin’ dogs!
lol. this is so true. i was sitting in class one day and all of the white people that were wearing shoes had new balances on
I wear them because they are cheap
About the part in bold face on New Balance is gonna help basketball return to the white men: bullcrap. Whenever a piece of clothing becomes highly valued, that is (like Nikes 20 years ago) in the streets of urban America, you may end up dead when the pair of shoes is something to “die for”. +
I wear New Balance, but I didn’t know about any of the things about labor and such. I have wide feet, and they are the only brand of shoes that fit well.
It’s nice to know I’ll be generalized for my choice of shoes after this.
I second this. The basic ones are super cheap. I don’t think that’s what he’s talking about here.
You’re forgetting about those of us who wear them because they’re the only sneakers available in wide sizes (EEE here).
I love the half-marathon group that shows up at trendy coffee shops to discuss their training regimen, shoes, fanny pack, etc over their non-fat, half foam, extra hot, single pump, sugar-free, fair trade, organic vanilla soy latte. I write for http://StuffRichPeopleLove.com and like that the rich don’t care if their shoes are from a sweat shop because they oppress 99.9% of the planet already!
I hate running.
I really don’t think all that much about sweatshops. Wearing sweatshop- made clothing/shoes is like killing insects. Yeah, it’s murder, but…..kind of unavoidable.
I am white, and I think the all-time stupid thing that dorky white people do is to wear New Balance shoes with clothes other than athletic wear. What is wrong with America? We have become a nation of dorkwads (to quote young John Connor in Terminator 2). I am visiting Ohio, and I think everyone in the entire state is a fat goober. They all wear athletic shoes (usually running shoes) with street clothes. None of them have ever run in their life (unless they run to the refrigerator for ice cream. What is wrong with the people of the midwest? Puleeeze, if you’re going to wear New Balance shoes, please go out and run. (Also, please stop wearing a white undershirt under a polo shirt. Who started this hideous trend? No one did this ten years ago, and now every nerd does it.)
While I’m at it, black people, please stop showing 10 inches of your underwear. You look just as stupid.
Johnnie boy, we could be a nation of rednecks, white trash or blue-collar saps…or since we elected Obama and the left wing blue state Democrats, turned into a bunch of yuppie techie dorks. +
Little boys like to hang out at my house, they think its rad!
put alil love in your heart
😉
Little boys like to hang out at my house too, and they think its rad that i lick their asses so they don’t have to use toilet paper.
They like to potty train in my mouth.
put a big dick in my mouth.
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
As I feel like I’m part of the nation of rednecks, white trash or blue collar saps, I would hope that they all come to my house and fuck me in the ass…..choo choo train style.
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
gooooooooooood
i am a loser with too many names and too much time. i think the reason why i’m skrewd up is cuz my dad rapes me… Blak pwr
put a big dick in my mouth. PLEASE!!!
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
yoink
Johnnie B, you are a tool. And racist as all hell. Where are you from, an incest compound in Idaho? How many kids in your hometown want to kill everyone in their school or workplace? Hmmmm, that kind of crap only happens in the wacked-out South or Rocky Mountain states. Shut your inbred trap before a true Midwesterner kicks your rectum through your throat.
Are you greatful to have shoes! I am
Lol I have a pair of New Balance running shoes. Hilarious
no, it is avoidable. if U.S.A wasn’t capitalist and greedy, we wouldn’t have to exploit other countries.
Of course you do.
creeper!!!
I like New Balance shoes because I do jog lol but also they are made really narrow and most sneakers from other companies are made for people with big fat feet
Johnnie B – please stop looking at feet and underwear…it is really strange! BTW, are you a NIKE man? (just do it).
I am black awesome dude and live with 2 whit roommates. This website describe both of my roommates very good!
I am not white but I love those shoes! they look cool! and my tongue is already used to european foods.
I like how this web site is “all in good fun”, but if someone made a site about Stuff Black People Like”, they’d be hung out to dry as the biggest racist of the century. Clearly white people are immune to being offended according to pop culture and the media.
We don’t get our panties in a was over silly shit.
Amen to capitalist and greedy, how bout some more of it. I want more stuff.
They are not showing underwear they are advertising ass. They can’t exactly walk around with a sandwitch sign on without getting arrested.
thats because white people weren’t enslaved, segregated and/or killled for thousands of years because of their skni color. theres obviously a different dynamic with black people and for a good reason. comments regarding stereotypes or race that are directed at black people are often not in good taste, so an article like ‘stuff black people like’ would be taken the wrong way by many people, for good reason. dont be offended just because some of these articles are accurate and you feel foolish for falling under these stereotypes. it is all in good fun, and it very likely would not be were it the other way around.
They do have a stuffblackpeoplelike website. it’s not even a big deal. 80% of black people don’t even know or care that it exists
also:
https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/28/101-being-offended/
congrats!
“thats because white people weren’t enslaved, segregated and/or killled for thousands of years because of their skni color” Well, this is not actually 100% true is it? People of nearly all races, nationalities and religions have at one time or another in history, including right now at this very moment, been enslaved, segregated and/or killed for simply being born as they were.
It is clear to me that you don’t know shit about shit! I am Slavic – the wrong kind of white in Europe. Our skin is white, our hair and eyes come in all colours and still we were slaves of Germans, Italians, French, Hungarians and Turks for roughly 1500 years.
Guess what, you pretentious cock-suckers! We had feudalism. Look it up! Whenever I hear a black USAer complaining about their paltry 300 years of slavery, I want to squeeze them by the neck and shake them until they shut the fuck up and open a history book.
These are actually very comfortable shoes! Still, not my preference though.
VM Ware
I have very wide feet, and New Balance are one of the few brands out there that cater to people like me. I don’t care where the shoes come from, they just have to fit.
This is a fairly accurate interpretation of the sweat shop thing that went down a few years ago.
I bet your white too!
A true standard in comedy blogging.
Another great site is http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
White people love grammar, as you know.
YOU’RE is the appropriate term, not YOUR, you ‘tard.
Hilarious!
Damn, that’s accurate.
So true! My husband is white and he won’t wear anything else. You should look into big sandles as well.
“Note: It is considered a legendary white male move to play basketball in a pair of New Balance. Lots of layups. ”
^hahahahahaha
I just played like 2.5 hours of bball last night and I am a white boy so I can’t dunk, and I was laying it up all day in my New Balances.
New Balance footwear fit all widths and sizes. It provides comfort and protection. I own a black pair of JAV1010 shoe by New Balance brand. It is awesome!
Unfortunately, if you’re living in Europe, wearing New Balance running shoes is a signal that you’re also a neo-Nazi. The “N” is taken as a substitute for the swastika, and signifies that you’re a radical nationalist.
Not to mention that I’ve never seen a NB shoe that didn’t look dorky.
what! seriously?!
This site is killer diller.
Here’s another good one: http://www.SomethingYouShouldRead.com
People who run seriously would never wear wear New Balance. They’d wear Mizuno, or Sacouny, or Brooks.
This site is just awesome. 😀
Does “Made in China” scare away white people from buying the shoes? Wait for the answer in the following post below.
The Answer: yes and no. Yes for the lower-income shopper. But NO for trendy affluent global conscious yuppie consumers.
I personally play the majority of my basketball in New Balance shoes.
To be fair, I can’t really wear Nike cause my foot’s pretty damn wide. Even my New Balance 4Es (widest shoe you can get at a normal store) end up busting on the outsides after a couple months.
White people sure do love comfort though.
New Balance is definitely a “white” brand. And to “Caitlin”, who said serious runners don’t use New Balance, you might wanna rethink that. Mizuno, Saucony, and Brooks are trash niche brands. Check NB’s NBx line – many people are wearing those. People who run are sporting NB, Asics, and Avia – brands with REALLY good tech.
Yep, we whites love us some NB’s. I only wear them because they are wider than other brands. Their regular width is about the same as other brands’ wide width.
I have never owned a pair of New Balance shoes but have always respected the quality the brand represents. Avia is my favorite brand. Believe me, once you feel the cushioning and stability of the cantilever heel you will be hooked and never wear any other brand of sneaker. Kohls has a nice selection of low priced avia shoes. Or you can check out http://www.aviadirect.com for the more expensive, high end stuff.
So true lol
New Balance is not completely “Made in the USA” – the heart broken news came out recently. Of course they go to extreme do defend the defintion of what product is truely “Made in the USA”. They’re not!
I wear New Balance shoes because they’re the only brand who make decent running shoes that don’t look like the illegitimate child of Dennis Rodman and an astronaut suit.
The New Balance shoes are really very comfortable and i wore them for this marathon which was a big hit this year. Nowadays not only runners but many wear such running shoes for jogging.My club members prefer new balance shoes to avoid problems on many issues.
This is one of the few posts that I not only agree with, but also one that applies to me. New Balance shoes are very white, and I often opt for them. Incredible.
Check out http://SomethingYouShouldRead.com
I like white people who try to justify their use of said product… and rationalize it the best they can.
Thank God! Something on the list that I finally don’t like!
I normally do not mind what shoes they are (as long as they aren’t made in sweatshops). Good reference to “Catcher in the Rye”, remember when one of the characters passed wind in chapel? Chapel is such a waste of time and should have been replaced with more time.
I ran for a marathon; training for it wasn’t that difficult, I would wake up at four in the morning and ran 13 miles for my short and over 20 for my long. Sometimes I would do an hour of hills.
I can’t stop laughing this is so funny. I’m a white guy who googled “new balance labor practices” because I was, you know, concerned. And the search brought me here. Screw it. I ordered a pair anyway. I’m still rolling.
Ya, I own 2 pairs. My mom owns a pair or 2. My husband owns one pair. I don’t jog but we do our P90X workouts in them. Yup, white people like them! lol
I don’t own NB shoes, but I am thinking about getting some for my HIIT treadmill running and plyometrics (pretty white unless you’re an athlete trying to be the best in your sport.)
RIGHT ON with the comment. Let me tell you something about white people and shoes…and this is where Nike in particularly gets it wrong. The only white people who think those screwy colors look cool are pre-teen boys, probably because they think Eminem is really tough and wish they were black.
Let’s face it, even the most athletic white kids are 2nd rate compared to the most athletic black kids. I was the one of the fastest white kids in my elementary school, but when it came to the overall track meet, I was always getting beat by a black kid. And my senior year in high school I could lift more weight than anybody, but I certainly wasn’t going to get any college scholarships for football. At UF, my good white friend on the football team (he was a punter of course) told me I could bench press more than 80% of the team (even super-jacked 220 pound Fred Taylor, and I weighed around 170), but by then I was lucky if I could run a 4.9, much less a 4.3, and I certainly didn’t have a 40″ vertical.
But the truth is that most white people over the age of 12 think the colors of most of these athletic shoes look ridiculous. We want solid color shoes, not some flashy look-at-me BS that most women think look ridiculous and only athletes and rappers can pull off.
“But the truth is that most white people over the age of 12 think the colors of most of these athletic shoes look ridiculous. We want solid color shoes, not some flashy look-at-me BS that most women think look ridiculous and only athletes and rappers can pull off.”
Welcome to the club! I dislike having to buy running shoes and how most have ridiculous colors. I wear a size 13 shoe so it becomes difficult to find functional and tasteful shoes in my size.
Regarding certain nouveaux riches’ bad taste: There is at least one good thing about the reduced probability of upward social mobility!
Whomever wrote this hasn’t met me. I am white and have never owned NB shoes. Most of the running shoes I have prefered were made by Saucony. But not all Saucony feel right either. I haven’t found a pair of NB that fit well enough at a cheap price to buy. But what brought me here was something googled about basketball shoes looking like clown shoes. They do now all of them. I protest as I have worn high tops for years. I haven’t played basketball since JR high school and never wore high tops till I started piece work framing. They became common for joisters and wall framers and high rollers “trusses” back in the 80’s. Also have worn them and no of many aircraft builders that wear them too. BK was a popular type for a while / never owned them. Mostly Reeboks in past to point of being hassled on bus by a rude little black kid that pointed out that I was wearing reeboks as he kept physically harassing a Japanese exchange student flicking a lighter in her face on the bus as it crossed Lake Washington. I hope he is in prison today. The bus driver ignored what was going on and I really felt like intervening and would have had it gotten any worse. More recent years I have worn Converse as they were cheap and felt good. Now all manufacturers make ugly clown shoes that no one wants to wear in these professions. Yes many swear that NB is best including a white guy I know with a black wife.
Oh I am wrong Reebok still has the sense to make the BB4600 hi top and its available at Sears for 33$ thru June 1st this week. Tried buying 6 pairs to pick up for 150 bucks but the web wouldn’t let me store says come in buy what we have we order the rest for same deal. They got like buy one get one 50% off with sale price too of 33$ so 16.50 off x 6 got me up too nearly 50$ off on web. thats 25 bucks a pair hell of a deal!
Note: It is considered a legendary white male move to play basketball in a pair of New Balance. Lots of layups.
Dammit! I am so busted, although in fairness I call them finger-rolls.
I suppose I’m one of those jerks who won’t shut up about Asics, but I have never owned a pair of NB shoes save the pink pair I got when I was five as a present.
Though arguably I bought my Asics for volleyball, I still wear them when I go running because I like them and don’t have any other running shoes.
So whoever wrote this has obviously never met me.
Thanks for the terrific article!
hmm, well I bought my New Balance shoes 5 years ago when they were on sale at Penny’s for $15. Didn’t know they would make me trendy/hipster! score for me
that’s pure BS. I have a friend who runs cross country for a division 1 university team. he runs an average of 12 miles a day and he wears mizuno wave riders. “trash niche brands”? what are you talking about?
Hey… shut the fuck up about your Asics.. and yeah whoever wrote this has def. got your number.
Really? i didn’t know that he did not tailor fit this to every white person in America. Who would have thought??
What’s wrong with Uggs? They are warm and comfy. Wearing them makes me feel superior to others who denigrate Uggs without ever having worn them.
Also in every Apple keynote Steve Jobs used to wear a couple of NB 991, well at least before the Nike+ shit thing.
if you like this blog, check out http://justsomepetpeeves.wordpress.com!!
Go to a suburban church and count how many new balance shoes you see.
I wear New Balance athletic shoes because they are the only brand I know of that makes a few vegetarian-friendly styles WITHOUT sweatshop labor. My last two pairs of leather athletic shoes were Avias purchased on clearance.
I’ve only had two pairs of Nikes in my life, once in junior high and once in high school. The first pair, which I wore about 50% of the time, were not well-made and wore out within three months. The second pair, which I bought only because they matched my gym uniform, lasted throughout high school. Why? I only wore them in gym class!
I used to love Adidas, but they are also evil. . .
New Balance are the only shoes that routinely are available in widths. As an 11 1/2 EEEE, I have to buy wide shoes. New Balance are the only game around in most stores. That, and I also love hiking.
I wear ASICS or New Balance and refuse to wear Nikes because of their shonky trade practices. Whenever I go to the gym and I’m sizing someone up to see if they’re worthy of my respect I always look at their shoes. If I see a good looking chick who I would usually think is too good for me one look at their Nike clad feet immediately makes me feel morally superior. However, it’s disconcerting to notice that a lot of non-white people wear Nikes.
New Balance are now made in China.
Well I began jogging this year but my whiteness is sadly compromised by continued insistence on wearing nike.
New Balances are related to more White People lovables than you have yet mentioned. They distribute to troops (supporting the troops), sponsor Matt Bonner (who makes layups, threes, and assists- and nothing else), sell expensive products that do not appear to be cheap and functional (a la the college student with an eight dollar sweater and an eighty-five dollar hair cut), and they have threatened the New England area with the possibility of moving their production to, you have guessed it, CANADA. They need only make sweaters and adopt abandoned Chinese baby girls (both of which may be in the planning stages) and they shall be the Whitest brand in human history.
PS- Chris, I understand your objection, but the only NB’s made in China are the NB’s sold in China. I was worried about the same thing, though.
Are you kidding me? You make yourself feel morally superior to someone else by looking at their shoes?
How’s this for you: consider how moral the practice of prejudice is.
Same. I have wide feet; can’t help it, and Nike’s and Adidas are too narrow. Sorry if that makes me too white, but I’m not going to buy to-skinny-shoes and get blisters just to appease people.
This is the first time I have ever been on this website. The second thing I decided to look at was NB shoes and I’ve just realised that I’m wearing a pair. However, I must add that I like them because the sports shop usually does a special price offer for two pairs after Christmas. (and I have wide feet)
i shit you not, i have a pair of new balance high-tops and bought them after i started playing in a rec league and was hassled for wearing new balance running shoes after twisting my ankle.
I wear New Balance because I have wide feet and the others don’t fit me.
I wear them in every season at most places.
I know people who work in the factory that makes them.
They cost less and are everywhere.
I am white.
White people don’t care that much about the running shoes they wear as long as they are comfortable.
Haha I think it’s having vans off the wall loafers now!!
My work shoes are New Balance, they last 3x longer than Vans…I am wearing them now. I used to wear Nike, but stopped, mostly because I couldn’t find a pair that didn’t look ugly.
It’s a sad day for me. NBs are now not only made in China but also Vietnam. I found them at KOHLs and SportMarts. I’m sure they’re everywhere by now.
Goodbye, NB! I’m taking my business elsewhere.
My NBs are dead to me. Bring on the Brooks! Their ethical code of conduct ensures that my shoes are being made by workers with an education.
White people, well all people, also enjoy http://www.NakedHipster.com. Mainly because the girls are hot and don’t have clothes on. Usually those two things go well together. You know, the hotness and the nakedness.
I can dunk in mine 🙂
i think new balance sneakers are the ugliest sneakers i have every seen….as a matter of fact i dont really like sneakers at all and the last time i looked i was white….oh by the way…im not that crazy about tims with the laces untied either…
hey that’s no fair! i really love my NB shoes. mainly i just like how ‘vintage’ they look…
Stopping by for the first time and I find this to be quite interesting. I have a question, do white people care about not messing up their expensive shoes when they drive?
vicky- another offended white person
ps New Balance shoes are pretty gay. I can’t really argue with that.
I think mormons get issued a couple of pairs along with their bicycles and stack of bibles to hand out.
W-I-D-E. At least once a year, I go to the Shoe Dept or whatever it is in the local mall, pull every pair of size 13 4E New Balance from the shelves — I seldom find more than five or six pairs — and pick the three or four least-ugly pairs and buy them, often without even trying them as I am so confident about their comfort.
Understand, though, that should qualify “least ugly”: I think New Balance are actually less ugly than most of the garish, overwrought atrocities that seem to hold the most appeal to youths and minorities. In fact, I long for more mundane sneakers, similar in appearance to the more conservative track shoes with thin soles and few appointments. But my primary interest is comfort; appearance, especially ostentatiousness, is for the young and “urban”.
haha I love this site but yeah…I’m white and I’ve never liked or owned a pair of NB
I am happy to have found this blog, and more happy to have long tail explained so well. Thanks.
I hate white people. This blog captures all that I hate about them. I’m going to have my skin tattooed black and have my facial features “Negrotized” and then I’m going to join the African American culture. Fuck you white jerks. I have just burned all my NB shoes and really thin t-shirts as well. Fuck all white people! I can’t wait till I’m black.
If it makes you feel any better I’ve seen a homeless black man in Boston Garden who wore New Balances. It was completely careless of whomever donated them since it hurts the brand’s image. Better to have hired someone to buy shoes from Target and then donate those.
Even New Balance has tacky and gauche shoes:
http://www.shopnewbalance.com/newbalanceMR870R.htm
One cannot help but wonder how that design received the executives’ stamp of approval.
All New Balance shoes are hideous. Most athletic shoes look awful to begin with, and New Balance manages to place a clunky sans-serif “N” atop their s**t sundae.
Adidas has managed to churn out a few stylish looking pairs, but NB somehow manage to make expensive high quality footwear that looks like it was not only made by children in a Taiwanese sweatshop, but designed by them too.
Seriously, they’re so ugly, if they’re going to put a giant letter it should at least be serif. Gee whiz
Nike Free ftw. I don’t think they still use sweatshops… or at least they’ve done a good job of sweeping it under the rug.
New Balance are some of the ugliest shoes ever. I know a million crackers and none of us own a pair.
They got nothing on some of the hip hop inspired eyesores though.
New balance may be the ugliest trainers ever but, they are one of the most comfortable running shoes out there along side Asics&Nike. I run as its part of my career, so i am always looking to try the next best thing, ‘New balance’ trainers are very durable and one of my Favourite running brands.
Clander, those are trailer park shoes you moron. We wear Mephistos or Pantofola d’Oro. Most Negroes can’t even pronounce the name let alone have the money to buy them.
I’m actually wearing New Balances right now and I’m not a runner, but I have good reason. 1. I have ridiculously wide feet and they’re about the only shoes I can find that fit me. 2. They’re comfortable. 3. Most New Balances are horridly ugly but if you get the right ones they look fine.
White people wear sneakers for comfort not style.
I never wanted to even wear sneakers or sporty shoes, being an artsy kind of gal, but now I’m 42 and have had a back injury and stand on my feet all day teaching art, so I buy them because I have to! (and I’m white, too…lol)
I do not understand what is particularly “white” about this.
Pretty close. White people seem to have foot width demands and when considering dropping $150 on a pair of “trainers” the options open up w/ NB. NB were always on the high shelf of the local running store and came in various widths that were *in stock* versus the Nike, Addidas, and that other A brand that could be ordered—an event white reserve to do for themselves in the comfort of their own Mac from Zappos.
This isn’t a list of “Stuff White People Like”.
This is a list of “Stuff White Liberals Like”.
I’m a Nigga that has been rocking New Balance 50 series shoes since the Eighties so your sterotype is wrong.
But then again everytime I step out in a pair some white person will offer up a cheerful ‘NICE SHOES BUDDY’ so you might be right after all.
Race has nothing to do with what kind of shoe’s one wears. Unless you need to follow the crowd. I wear NB because they keep my feet centered and prevents painfull corns from developing. I wear what allows me to work without pain or irritation in my feet. I never buy certain shoes because it’s the style. Comfort is the key and that’s what I buy. I’m not a style guru. I dance to my own drummer and I respect those who do the same. I’ve tried other brands and big brand named sneekers and these are the best for me. Proud to be non jogger/runner who wears NB.
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Sorry, New Balance are ridiculously popular in Korea. Among the Koreans. Not the ‘white’ people. This one is a bit of a miss.
This website is called, “Stuff White People Like” not “Stuff ONLY White People Like.”
I own a Pair of New Balances because they are the only brand of running shoes that fir my cave man feet.
I am white though.
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I have been LMBO at these posts…LOLOLOL!!! I happen to like New Balance shoes. Now, I wear Saucony. I refuse to wear Nike simply b/c everyone else does & their tennis shoes NEVER appealed to me.
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This post doesn’t make sense to me because the people I see wearinget New Balance the most are Asian peoplease. NB shoes always seem to be in their style, but I ra rely see white people wearing NB.
There is certainly a great deal to know about this subject. I love all the points you made.
F “ck, I thought I was the only white boy wearing new balance shoes?
I’m white and I wear NB’s while dancing to funk.
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One mention of your affinity for selected footwear could undo all of your hard work. … shcarnival.wordpress.com
I just ordered a fresh pair of M574s in gray. Yes, I am a white guy in his 30s from New England. Yes, one side of my family came here on the Mayflower. Yes, I went sailing yesterday.
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I dont have any new balance shoe, they dont make it in the trailer park.
I’m white I don’t run I wear New balance cause they cheap and comfortable. I don’t give a Fuck where they are made or if blacks can afford them or not
Negroes in the African bush don’t wear shoes and don’t seem to have foot problems, and can run for days. Yet I’ve never seen a negro here in the States wearing running sandals or minimalist shoes. They wear untied big stupid heavy Chinese made, overpriced high tops…and wonder why they’re always getting caught by the police??? Go figure. They might be able learn something from their REAL African counterparts..
White people wear New Balance because it’s known that blacks don’t like or wear them to any meaningful extent. It helps insure we’re not shot and killed for our shoes.
the only reason I’ve ever had new balance running shoes is because they come in size EEEE
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I’m guessing by hearing you say white people a million times you’re probably black people? Right? Lol okay… well maybe instead of commenting on other peoples shoes and shoe decisions you could possibly keep your mouth shut and get some kind of a life? lol also…. Maybe someone might like new balance shoes because they offer wide and extra wide shoes. Some people need that kind of shoe and it is hard to find in other brands….. wow 🤩 did that maybe clarify your small thought process? Lol wow to write a whole page on really dumb stuff you black people don’t know what you’re talking about. How about you just shut up. You are everything wrong in this world currently, black people.
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I wear them because they are really comfortable. I would wear clown shoes or little dead toy poodles bound to my feet with strips of rawhide if they were this comfortable. Though I am pleasantly surprised to discover that they aren’t made by enslaved child laborers. TMYK…